Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 -OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT-BROADCAST IN OAOAST 3D CUE: Scary music~! Outside a HAUNTED HOUSE sit two carved PUMPKINS on the porch with the faces of DEUCE DEUCE BIGELOW and ABDULLAH NERDLY. The door creaks open and we go inside to find OLD GLORY displayed on the wall with action figures of CHRISTIAN WRIGHT and SPENCER REIGER positioned on a shelf nearby. As we continue through the house, grainy black and white footage of the BPT/REJECT/OOHLALA incident from HeldDOWN~! can be seen on the 1950’s era TV in the living room. In the kitchen, the images of TK, THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS, MARIACHI and THE ALL-AMERICAN BOYS are found on a MILK CARTON with the caption "MISSING." On the walls in the hall are pictures of ZACK MALIBU, TODD CORTEZ and JASON SILVER. We hit the bedrooms next and find posters of JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN and MELISSA NERDLY in one room, posters of J-MAX and JO-JO WHOA (with lipstick on cheek) in another. The master bedroom contains a replica of the OAOAST Championship, a $100 bill and a CROWN on a blood stained bed. Out in the backyard is a TOMBSTONE with a photo of ALIX MARIA SPEZIA and ODIN. THUNDER sounds and then LIGHTNING strikes, splitting the tombstone in half.OAOAST HALLOWEEN SPECTACULAR VBOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! After the pyro concludes we go to the arena to see a sea of humanity with numerous people dressed in costumes. Sofa Central, which is decorated as a pumpkin patch is our next scene. There are miniature witches and monsters lined throughout the area, and a fake black cat rests on the announce desk. COLE Hello and welcome to Las Vegas for Halloween Spectacular! Trick or Treat, Coach. Does Krista have some tricks up her sleeves for tonight’s mainevent? COACH Krista’s doesn’t usually wear shirts with sleeves when she wrestles. Hell, she barely even wears clothes! COLE Urrrgghhh. Or will it be the ultimate treat for Landon Maddix or Theodore Moneymaker? Also on tap is a Buried Alive match between Alix and Odin that’s fitting for this very night. COACH And don’t forget about my boy Reject sonning that hot headed muscle freak Big Papa Thrust. Big Papa Thrust thinks he runs with the big boys? Nah, Reject gonna show him where he belongs. He gonna be out trick or treating with the little kids because that's where he belongs. COLE And we’ll have another major triple threat contest, pitting Todd Cortez against former friend Jason Silver and The Franchise Zack Malibu. We'll also to the highly anticipated debut of a new broadcast personality! The entertainment industry has been trying to guess who it could be. COACH My guess is Kris Humphries. Homeboy needs a new gig now. Ain't got no league to play in, ain't got no wife to support him. He needs this! COLE Let’s get this spooky night of fights and frights started! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 *DINGDINGDING* Jo-Jo offers a handshake to start off the match and after a brief pause, J-MAX accepts. COLE Alright, getting things started on the right foot. Good to see. Both men circle each other tentatively, until J-MAX sees an opening and springs up, hooking Jo-Jo around the head and taking him over with a hurricanrana! 1... 2... NO! COLE Oh, almost had him immediately! Jo-Jo wasn't expecting that! As Jo-Jo gets back up with a look of surprise on his face, J-MAX points out how close he came to beating him. Jo-Jo responds by rushing J-MAX and sending him off the ropes. Up and over a drop down, J-MAX then tumbles, rolling underneath a leapfrog by Jo-Jo. As he lands on his feet Jo-Jo then hits the ropes. J-MAX sidesteps, then tries a leapfrog of his own, but Jo-Jo hooks the top rope and stops himself. Able to land well J-MAX quickly runs at Jo-Jo and does a wall flip off of him against the ropes. J-MAX then runs forward again, backdropped over the top by Jo-Jo, but able to land on the apron. As Jo-Jo tried to deliver a shoulder through the ropes J-MAX flips back inside over his back, coming off the ropes and looking for a monkey flip, which Jo-Jo shoves him off of, only for J-MAX to somersault onto his feet. "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And we are at a stalemate! COACH Wow! With neither able to get the advantage, J-MAX and Jo-Jo acknowledge the other's efforts and things slow back down. "LET'S GO J - MAX!" "LET'S GO JO - JO!" "LET'S GO J - MAX!" "LET'S GO JO - JO!" Going to lock up, J-MAX surprises Jo-Jo with a kick to the back of the leg and quickly grabs a side headlock. Jo-Jo pushes J-MAX off and ducks his head for a backdrop, which J-MAX reads and counters with a kick to the shoulder blade. J-MAX then follows up with a spinning wheel kick to knock the rookie down! COLE These two evenly matched in size and style, but J-MAX has the experience edge. He's been there and done it here in the OAOAST. J-MAX whips Jo-Jo into the corner and tries to follow in, but runs into a boot. Jo-Jo quickly goes to the middle rope. Alert, J-MAX springs up to meet him there. Jo-Jo pushes J-MAX off... and although the masked superstar backflips and lands on his feet, seconds later comes off the rope with a missle dropkick turning J-MAX inside out! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" Cover by Jo-Jo... 1... 2... NO! Delivering some forearms, Jo-Jo comes off the ropes and goes for a clothesline, which is caught by J-MAX. Wringing the arm, the Brit winds up behind Jo-Jo and leaps onto his shoulders, looking for a victory roll. Jo-Jo throws him off though and then kicks J-MAX across the backs of the knees. COLE That might be a smart move, to try and attack the legs and ground J-MAX. COACH I don't think that's what these two want though Cole, they wanna see who the best high flier is. Which is dumb, but it is what it is. Off the ropes, Jo-Jo delivers a running dropkick and covers again... 1... 2... NO! Jo-Jo leads J-MAX up by the mask. The referee warns him about it though and when Jo-Jo holds his hands up to apologise, J-MAX takes advantage and jumps up to deliver a jawbreaker! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!" With Jo-Jo dazed, J-MAX drops him with a spinning back kick. Getting in position he follows up with a STANDING CORKSCREW MOONSAULT!! COLE WOW! 1... 2... NO! J-MAX attacks Jo-Jo as he tries to get up with kicks, then hits the ropes. Sparking to life Jo-Jo catches the Brit on his shoulders in a fireman's carry... but J-MAX squirms free. Shoving Jo-Jo into the ropes, J-MAX then scores with a Powerslam! COLE You don't see that out of J-MAX often! 1... 2... NO! Rolling outside, J-MAX stands on the apron and waves Jo-Jo back to his feet, with something in mind. Leaping to the top, the masked flier springboards off the top and does a somersault in mid-air... ...onto his feet, as Jo-Jo moves out of the way! Jo-Jo waits for J-MAX to turn around, then springs back off the middle rope, hooking J-MAX with an ace crusher!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE The Jo-Jo Butter Cutter! What a move! Cover by Jo-Jo... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE This match back and forth, as we expected. Two dazzling OAOAST stars throwing big bombs at each other, in an attempt to put the other away! COACH It's a human highlight reel, that's for sure. Whipping him to the corner, Jo-Jo hits J-MAX with a corner clothesline. Jo-Jo tries a whip the other way, which is reversed. As he approaches the turnbuckles though, Jo-Jo manages to scale the ropes and hits a MOONSAULT PELE KICK out of the corner on the oncoming J-MAX!! JO-JO WHOOOOOOAAAAAAAA!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE That's the Whoa Whoa Wall Flip Kick, Coach. COACH Yeah, this kid's a goofball. Neglecting to go for a cover, Jo-Jo drags J-MAX around and heads for the top rope instead. COLE Jo-Jo going to take a risk here, scaling to the top and looking for something big! Jo-Jo reaches the top and takes a second to fire up the crowd. Which proves his downfall, as J-MAX avoids his attempted double stomp from the top! Rolling through Jo-Jo comes to his feet and takes a wild dive at J-MAX, who evades again, causing Jo-Jo to throw himself into the turnbuckles! Jo-Jo staggers away, into a REVERSE RANA BY J-MAX!!!!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE OH MY! Right on his head! Knocked loopy, Jo-Jo is forced down and pinned... 1... 2... NO! J-MAX looks appealingly to the referee, surprised that wasn't enough. COLE Give this kid credit, able to kick out after being spiked into the mat like a tentpole! Working Jo-Jo over with kicks, J-MAX then comes off the ropes and blasts him with a Busaiku Knee Kick! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Looking for something to finish Jo-Jo off, J-MAX slams him near the corner and heads to the top. COLE Now it's J-MAX going up, where he's very comfortable. J-MAX measures up Jo-Jo and comes off the top with a 450 Kneedrop... ...but MISSES! Jo-Jo is able to move out of the way and with J-MAX hurt on his knees, Jo-Jo quickly snaps off a Kneeling Flatliner!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Great resourcefulness from the newcomer! Still feeling the effects of the reverse hurricanrana, Jo-Jo is slow to follow up, but eventually turns J-MAX over and hooks the leg... 1... 2... NO! Immediately climbing outside, Jo-Jo goes to the top rope with J-MAX still down... ...and soars HIGH with the Top Rope Double Stomp!!!! COLE CRASHING STAR!! Jo-Jo makes the pin... 1... 2... KICKOUT!! COLE BOTH of these guys showing tremendous resiliance! COACH They're leaving it all out there, no doubt. Looking a little lost for what to try next, Jo-Jo eventually decides to pick J-MAX up. As he scoops the Englishman up for a slam though he loses him, J-MAX able to float over the back. Jo-Jo sees the turnbuckles lying invitingly in front of him and tries the Wall Flip Kick again... but J-MAX runs underneath it! As Jo-Jo picks himself up, J-MAX then comes off the second rope with a BLOCKBUSTER!! COACH OH, SNAP! J-MAX drags himself up and calls for the finish. COLE It may be time to take things to the MAX! Climbing to the top, J-MAX throws up a sign to the crowd and takes off... ...but finds NOBODY HOME on the Shooting Star Legdrop!!!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Getting up holding his tailbone, J-MAX's back is further punished by a LUNGBLOWER from Jo-Jo! Cover... 1... 2... NO!! COLE Still not enough! But Jo-Jo is calling for the end here! Jo-Jo quickly picks J-MAX up, trying to set him up for the Cradle DDT. J-MAX manages to escape though and tries a northern lights suplex. Able to block, Jo-Jo breaks free with some knees to the chest. A shove sends J-MAX back into the ropes and Jo-Jo throws him up in the air... ...but J-MAX plants a foot on his chest and BACKFLIPS OFF OF HIM! Landing on his feet, the Brit ducks a clothesline and springs off the middle rope, twisting in mid-air... ...but Jo-Jo BLOCKS a swinging DDT and turns it into the CRADLE DDT, SPIKING J-MAX DIRECTLY ON THE TOP OF HIS HEAD!!!!!!!! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" COLE OH, MY~! COACH That boy got DRILLED!! Cover by Jo-Jo... 1... 2... 3!!!!! *DINGDINGDING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner... JO - JO... WWWHHHHHHOOOOAAAAAAA!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Sitting up, Jo-Jo nods his head with a smile, a mixture of relief and satisfaction at pulling out the win. COLE A major statement made by Jo-Jo Whoa, coming up with a big win! COACH That was impressive, I've gotta give the kid credit. He may be goofy, but he's got talent. And these idiots seem to like him for whatever reason, so whatever. Jo-Jo pats J-MAX on the chest and having given him the chance to recover a little, gives him a hand up. Favouring his neck, J-MAX is able to raise Jo-Jo's hand in a token of victory before falling back to one knee. Jo-Jo bows to him, before scaling the turnbuckles to salute the crowd. COLE What a balls to the wall effort from both these men tonight. Incredible action. And we're going to be seeing a lot more where that came from in the future from both men, I've got a feeling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 OLE Folks, up next we have a match that for Abdullah Abir Nerdly could be more frightening than any Halloween monster, as he faces the monster from right here in Vegas, Deuce Deuce Bigelow. Got a chance to talk to Deuce earlier today, and he said he may have more hatred for Abdullah than he ever did for his ex-partner Kareem. COACH I just don't understand why you'd hate someone who's heart is full of love for all living beings. Abdullah won't even eat meat that's how much love he has for god's creatures. COLE I saw him eating a double cheeseburger earlier today! COACH That was a cow made by the devil. “Arab Money Instrumental” blasts through the speakers and out walks Abdullah Nerdly. BUFFER OAOAST Marks, the following special challenge match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, by way of Damascus, Syria..."THE SPEAKER FOR THE PROPHETS"... ABDULLAH AABBIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRR NNEEERRRRRDDLLLLYYYYY!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" A spotlight shines on Abdullah as he kneels mid-ring for prayer. COACH What do you suppose is going through the mind of Abdullah Nerdly right now, Cole? COLE How I wish my guys weren't banned from ringside, because I've just been informed OAOAST officials issued the ruling moments ago. COACH That's not fair. It could throw Abdullah's entire strategy out the window. COLE Like using his church members to help him defeat Deuce? COACH Well, uh... COLE Uh-huh. “I’m Bad” by the Last Vegas hits and the Beast from Sin City power walks to the ring. BUFFER And his opponent… from LAS VEGAS, NEVADA, weighing 390 pounds… "THE BEAST FROM SIN CITY"... DEUCE DEUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCE BIGELOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" As Deuce approaches ringside, Abdullah dives threw the ropes and connects with a forearm smash that doesn’t even faze the big man. In fact, the inspirational leader of the CoA bounces right off! COLE Abdullah splattered all over like a fly that crashed into a windshield. Deuce pounds his chest ala King Kong and chases after a terrified Abdullah, who sides into the ring and introduces his boot to the face of the Beast from Sin City. * DINGDINGDING * The match officially underway, the self-professed Speaker for the Prophets gouges Deuce’s eyes and then delivers a top rope double stomp! The cover. ONE! KICKOUT… AND WITH AUTHORITY! Abdullah takes flight once more, but this time he’s caught in midair and crushed in the corner. Deuce follows up with a series of shoulder thrusts and forearm shots, then fires Abdullah across and executes his trademark handspring elbow! COACH Things aren’t looking too good for Abdullah. Abdullah staggers out of the corner and into the arms of Deuce, who delivers a sit-out shoulder piledriver! COLE What Happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas! The cover. ONE! TWO! THR-- NO! Deuce breaks the pin, points to the top and delivers a FLYING HEADBUTT! COLE Funky Cold Medina! The cover. NO! Deuce decides to perform another top rope flying head BUTT! COACH What the hell? Put the man out of his misery. COLE I think Deuce intends to put that snake in the grass through more of it. Deuce follows with a second and third flying head BUTT and then covers Abdullah. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! * DINDDINGDING * “I’m Bad” by the Last Vegas plays as Deuce beats his chest. BUFFER Here is your winner… DEUCE DEUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCE BIGELOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Backstage, TK and the Heavenly Rockers tear their dressing room apart in a fit of rage. COLE Abdullah Nerdly proved to be no match for Deuce Deuce Bigelow without his church members present.TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT OAOAST WORLD TITLEKRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN VS LANDON MADDIX VS THEODORE MONEYMAKER TONIGHT!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 THE WORLD IS MINE! Numerous flashing spotlights that alternate between entirely red and entirely white flood the entrance stage. The lights on the floor then turn blue cutting through a thin haze that fills the stage. Stepping into this tranquil mist, Spencer does an arrogant twirl before doing a quick Timberlake style dance. At his side, looking as ravishing as ever is Lorelei DeCenzo. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of thirty minutes! Now making his way to the ring, being accompanied by LORELEI DECENZO, he hails from Manhattan, New York, weighing in at two hundred ten pounds, he represents THE ENTERPRISE, one third of the OAOAST Six Man Champions….”THE ONE MAN TRIPLE THREAT” SPENCEEERRR REEEEIIGGGEEERRRRRR! Spencer strolls down the entrance ramp, as confident and arrogant as one can possibly be. All along the walkway, flashing blue and red illuminations that read “SR” appear. COLE Spencer Reiger looking to give Christian the fight and fright of his life on this Halloween Night. He’s here to challenge for the United States title. COACH This would be Spencer’s first single title in the OAOAST, after capturing a few OAOVW titles in the minor leagues. But, I just can’t believe this match is happening. This is just heartbreaking. Standing atop the turnbuckle, Spencer rips open his Affliction hoody to show off his body while the lights rapidly alternate from to blue to red. Diddy’s “Come With Me” hits and with the song comes a heaping of boos from the Vegas crowd. Swagged out in a shimmering golden jacket, Christian Wright steps into the graveyard. Applauding him with earnest enthusiasm is Sophie. BUFFER And introducing the champion…being accompanied by SOPHIE, he weighs in at 8 1/3 bars of gold, now residing in Washington DC, representing the CUCARACHA KINGDOM, “THE GOD CHILD” CHRIIIIISTTIIIIIAAANNNN WRRRRIIIIIIIIGGHHHHHHHHT! Wright and Sophie at the final announcement from the ring announcer. The rest of the attendees merely boo and offer thumbs down. COLE This match made by Alfdogg and came about after a brawl between Spencer and Wright. COACH I think both men are in the wrong. Spencer didn’t have to insult CW like he did on Syndicated, and CW didn’t have to go and mess with Spencer during his match on HeldDOWN. This whole situation is foul. DING DING DING WRIGHT I extended my hand to you, not as equal to equal, but as superior to inferior, as our roles have always been. Wright puts out his hand, expecting Spencer to shake it after just being called inferior. Spencer takes no moment to consider this, and swiftly boots Wright in the gut. Wright is snagged into a side headlock, and has neck stretched and worked over by The One Man Triple Threat. COACH Who do you think the OAOAST Galaxy is pulling for in this one? COLE I don’t think they like either man. But, if I had to guess I suppose Spencer would gather more cheers than Wright. He was somewhat likable for a short period of time in the spring and early summer. Wright manages to shove Spencer into the ropes. Rather than bounce back, Spencer hooks his arms around the cables. This annoys the US champion, and he dashes at the New Yorker. Spencer greets his charge with a kick to the stomach, and follows that with a sunset flip… ONE! Wright easily rolls out the pinfall. Coming to his feet, he’s caught inside another side headlock by Spencer. COLE Spencer Reiger’s current and Christian Wright’s former boss, will be in a triple threat match later tonight for the OAOAST World Title. And if Moneymaker wins I have to believe Christian, being the US champion, could have a claim to a title shot. Wright manages to power out Spencer’s headlock. However, he can do no more than that as Spencer upends him with a beautiful dropkick. Spencer then comes off the ropes, returning to hit a now standing Wright with an inverted bulldog! COLE New York Knockout! The cover… ONE! TWO! Kickout! CW hurries to his feet, and speeds to the ropes. They spit him back at Spencer, who catches him with flapjack! Another cover is made… ONE! TWO! Sophie puts CW’s foot on the ropes, drawing a heated stare from Lorelei. COLE These two OAOAST Hotties are liable to go at it at any moment. For now Sophie has to settle for talking strategy with Wright, as he sneaks out the ring before Spencer can grab hold of him. “CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS!” SOPHIE FERMEZ LA BOUCHE! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Spencer can only take so much of Wright’s stalling, and his limit is easily reached. He steps out the ring to go fetch CW, but The God Child begins running away. Spencer gives chase until both men find themselves inside the ring. Wright backs away from Spencer, luring the younger superstar in. This plan works wonders as Wright is able to hit Spencer with a Wright Off (sky high) the moment Spencer reaches him! Referee Clem Buzzlefoxer counts the resulting pinfall… ONE! TWO! Lorelei applauds as Spencer makes the kickout. COLE Folks, right after this match we'll see the debut of our new broadcast personality! COACH My man Kris Humphries on the set! COLE It could be anyone! Wright lifts Spencer up to terrorize him with a hard European Uppercut. This dazes Spencer, and he’s unable to stop Wright from swinging around him to grab a rear waistlock. Spencer attempts to fight free of the hold, but meets with failure and is dropped to the canvas with a bridging German Suplex. Buzzlefoxer scores the fall… ONE! TWO! Spencer lifts his shoulder up to end the pinfall! Wright argues the call, as most superstars in the OAOAST tend to do. As always the call remains the same and Christian is forced to go about his way. He brings Spencer off the mat, and then hits him with a pair of knife edge chops. They lead into a snap powerslam that’s counted by the official… ONE! TWO! Spencer makes the kickout at the last moment. COACH It could be a serious momentum killer for The Enterprise if Spencer took the loss to CW tonight. COLE And at the same time it would do wonders for The Cucaracha Kingdom if Wright were to successfully defend his United States title. Wright brings Spencer to his feet, and arrogantly slaps him across the face. This brings Spencer to life and he begins to send a wave of punches into Christian’s face. Christian tries to fight back against the onslaught, but his defense is shredded by a kick to the stomach. Spencer then hooks up Wright for the Reiger Counter, drawing out a cheer from the sold out Vegas audience. COLE This could be the end of Christian Wright’s title reign! Luckily for Christian, he’s able to back body drop Spencer to save himself from sure defeat. Wright takes a moment to collect himself before trying to turn Spencer into a Golden Cloverleaf. Spencer furiously battles against the hold, and succeeds in shoving Wright into the ropes with his legs. Wright is thrown back into a rollup by Spencer… ONE! TWO! Wright untangles himself from the pinfall. COACH Maybe our new broadcast personality ain't Kris Humphries. Maybe its the Greatest Of All Time Tim Duncan. COLE Why are you assuming its an NBA player? COACH Those boys gotta eat! Spencer and Wright exchange blows at the center of the ring with Wright winning out with a European Uppercut. The God Child goes on to lift Spencer onto his shoulders, looking for his rolling fireman’s carry. However Spencer counters, by swinging out to hit a DDT onto his opponent. COLE Former friends battling it out live on Halloween Spectacular on TSM. And tonight we’ll have two major triple threat matches, in addition to Reject versus Big Papa Thrust and a Buried Alive match. Spencer grabs hold of Wright’s legs, using that grip to slingshot Wright into the ring posts. With Wright leaning against the turnbuckles, Spencer rushes in and splashes him! Wright staggers backwards and is hit with a neckbreaker by his old friend. The cover… ONE! TWO! Sophie again places Wright’s foot on the ropes. COACH Its like I always say, Sophie is useful, and she’s smart. COLE Compared to Queen Esther she’s got the wrestling mind of Ric Flair. Spencer starts to haul Wright off the canvas. However, Wright fights back with punches to Spencer’s ripped midsection. Having doubled over Spencer, Wright heads to the ropes. Returning to his foe, he rocks him with a knee to the face! COLE What a knee! Christian Wright with that high impact style he’s known for. Wright allows Spencer to get to his feet under his own power. Once his challenger is fully upright, Wright winds up and clocks him with a superkick! COLE That’s the move that defeated Moneymaker at Angleslam! Wright hopes it will defeat Spencer as he hooks the legs for the cover… ONE! TWO! Kickout! Wright drapes Spencer across the ropes, using them as a weapon to choke the poor kid. “CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS!” CHRISTIAN SILENCE! The crowd, of course, does not go silent. They continue to boo as Wright pulls Spencer away from the ropes. He raises him up slightly, and then drops him face first onto the top turnbuckle. Spencer stumbles away from the ropes, and is placed onto Wright’s shoulder. The God Child rolls forward with his fireman’s carry depositing Spencer on the ground. COLE He calls that 30 Pieces of Silver, after the amount of money it took for Judas to betray Christ. COACH I'm sure we're paying our new broadcast personality a lot more than that! Wright grabs onto Spencer’s legs for the cover… ONE! TWO! Kickout! Wright gets up to argue with Buzzlefoxer, believing the count to be a terribly slow one. All this does is create an opportunity for Spencer to charge Wright, and he does so with incredible speed. But Wright is aware of his approach and back body drops him over the orange ropes and onto the ring floor! COLE Folks, we’ve got to take a commercial break! Halloween Spectacular and this United States title match continues after this.COMMERCIAL As we return from break, Wright has hooked Spencer into a sleeper hold. Buzzlefoxer begins raising Spencer’s arms to test if he can continue the title bout. “ONE!” “TWO!” The arm is lifted a third time and this time it stays up. Spencer begins pumping elbow after elbow into Wright’s side to break the hold. Eventually his tactics prove fruitful and Wright releases him. COLE Spencer’s free! Let’s see what he can do! Spencer nails Wright with an inverted atomic drop! This staggers the champion, and Spencer takes advantage of it by running the ropes and hitting him with a high knee lift! The cover… ONE! TWO! Kickout! COACH I don’t like seeing these two fight, but they’ve put on a high quality match. Maybe, if they fight it’ll get the animosity out and they can be friends again. COLE I never knew you were so sentimental. Wright is whipped into the ropes, and upended with a hurricanrana upon his return. The cover is counted by Buzzlefoxer… ONE! TWO! Wright gets himself out the pinfall. Beyond the view of referee and superstars, Lorelei has slid the title belt into the ring. This does not go unnoticed by Sophie, who rushes over to tackle Lorelei to the ground. The two beautiful ladies tussle and tangle, determined to rip each other’s hair out. COACH Maybe this Kingdom/Enterprise feud isn’t so bad! Wright gets to his feet, and hits at Spencer with a forearm. He then attempts a basic body slam on his foe. But Spencer slips out the back to avoid the move. Wright turns around and is nailed in the stomach with a kick. This gives Spencer the chance to set Wright up for the Reiger Counter. The fans get to their feet, expecting to see a title change in a matter of moments. But Wright delays this by low blowing Spencer! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!” Wright traps Spencer inside a small package… ONE! TWO! THREE! NO! Wright is unable to fathom how he couldn’t have earned a three on that pin. He lets the referee hear his concerns and complaints, while completely ignoring Spencer. This is problematic for Wright, as Spencer has picked up the United States title. COACH Don’t do it, Spencer! Don’t do it! Wright turns around, despite Sophie’s request that he exit the ring as quickly as he can. Spencer surges forward and smashes the title belt into his face! Wright drops to the canvas, left in severe agony. DING DING DING BUFFER Your winner as a result of a disqualification and still OAOAST United States Champion….CHRISTIAN WRIGHT! The fans don’t seem to care that Wright remains champion. They’re simply pleased to have seen him get hit with his own title belt. COLE Its Christian Wright who’s the winner, but its Spencer Reiger who stands tall tonight in Las Vegas. Spencer drapes the title across Christian’s chest, and then delivers a sarcastic round of applause for his former friend. COLE Well, folks, we're just seconds away from the debut of our new broadcast personality! COACH We're just seconds away from meeting you're replacement! COLE No can replace the irreplaceable. I have pictures of Alf with a goat! Folks, let's see who some of our superstars think its going to be! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 VINNY I bet its gonna be Vick The Shark. CAMERAMAN Who’s Vick The Shark? VINNY Vick the Shark is the meanest gangster in my neighborhood in Brooklyn. He fears no man, except for me Vinny V. Vick The Shark is Vick the Guppie to this bad mama jamma! CAMERMAN Viewing audience, I wish you could see me rolling my eyes. **** TIM CASH I hope whoever it is is an upstanding, kindhearted, loving, and caring person. But whatever their personality, I’ll be the first to help them feel at home. ***** SCOTTISH SCOTT They better be able to hold their liquor. DANNY Aye. SCOTTISH Its an OAOAST tradition for all the new guys to have a drink with us, and we don't wanna have to drag some lightweight back to the hotel room. ***** MELODY I hope it’s a dude! And I hope he’s not that cute, because cute guys don’t play Words With Friends I noticed. What is it with cute guys? I asked Spencer if he wanted to play and he just laughed in my face. But I asked you, mister cameraman, and you were all for it. CAMERAMAN For playing a game with you I get called ugly?! **** AMBERLYN I’m not really too concerned who it is. CAMERAMAN Surely you have some guess. AMBERLYN Nah, not really. CAMERMAN But you jumped to the front of the line to say who you thought it was. AMBERLYN I just wanted to get on TV. Makes it easier to get in the clubs, ya know. Well, you probably don’t because you look like a loser who couldn’t get in if he had his own television channel devoted to him. **** HOLLY If it’s a girl, that bitch better respect the fact that this (beep) is the goddess around here, if she can’t (beep) respect that (beep) she’s gonna be minus a few teeth. CAMERAMAN And if it’s a guy? HOLLY Depends. CAMERMAN On what? HOLLY If he’s got a big fat (beep). Because if he does, I’m gonna drag him into my hotel room put my lips around that nice juicy (beep) and suck and slurp every last ounce of (beep) out that (beep). CAMERMAN Don’t you have a husband?! HOLLY He’ll be (beep) me from behind the whole (beep) time. CAMERMAN I think we should probably end on that note. COLE Folks, lets meet our new broadcast personality! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 We’re taken to a Halloween themed interview set. Webs, large fake spiders, two giant mummies, a coffin complete the scene along with a haunted house backdrop. The camera pans over to reveal… Celebrity SARA JEAN UNDERWOOD! SARA Hello! I’m Sara Jean Underwood, but for purposes of keeping things sweet and simple you can call me Sara or SJU for short. And, I am the newest edition to the OAOAST broadcast team. When I got the call to join the OAOAST there was a lot of heavy breathing and a weird slapping noise on the other line, but after that the director of talent relations came on to invite me to join the party, and I couldn’t resist. I’ve watched the OAOAST for years, and its always looked like a lot of fun. I’ve always told myself it would be cool to be a part of all the zany action, and lo and behold I’m now officially a member of the OAOAST Galaxy! But enough about me, lets meet my first ever guest, one Baron Windells. Baron walks onto the scene, earning himself a huge cheer from the arena audience. SARA Baron, you look great! But, how do you feel? We all know you had that separated shoulder. BARON That separated shoulder was caused by the most intense match I’ve ever been apart of. The Elimination Chamber at Angleslam. A lot of folks ask me if I regret being in that match ‘cause I busted up my shoulder pretty bad. I just look at them like they’re crazy. When you get a world title opportunity you seize it. It don’t matter what type of match its in. Inferno, barbwire, falls count anywhere, when the call comes to compete for the world title you answer that call the second its made. SARA What was it like being on the shelf for these past couple of months? BARON Its been nothing but hell. I love the OAOAST with all my heart, but I just couldn’t watch it when I was at home rehabbing my shoulder. It made me sick knowing I’m not out there competing, and doing what I do best and what I love. SARA So what comes next for you? BOHEMOTH (OS) What comes next is getting out of my interview. Bohemoth strides onto the scene. He takes a look at BW and Sara and sneers. Sara, for her part, puts on friendly face. SARA Hi, I’m Sara. BOHEMOTH Hi, I don’t care. SARA You must be Bohemoth. BOHEMOTH I must be Bohemoth? As if there was any doubt. How many people do you know that stand my height, weigh my weight, and look my look? Of course, I’m Bohemoth. BARON What do you want, pal? BOHEMOTH I want an explanation. SARA An explanation on what? BOHEMOTH On a bunch of things. Why wasn’t I given a match on this show? I dominated this sport in the summer, I was the face of this company, and when fall comes around I’m forgotten about? And why do you get time to introduce yourself as if anyone gives a crap about you or why you’re here. SARA Hey! BOHEMOTH And why does he get screen time? He didn’t obliterate Krista, he didn’t survive the Elimination Chamber, he got injured in it, because of ME, and its all about me! Now somebody get this asshat a chair so he can watch the face of this company and learn a few tips on being a professional. Ask me a question. BARON I’ve got a question for you. BOHEMOTH What? BARON How’s your nose? BOHEMOTH My nose? Nothing’s wrong with my nose.POW! Baron slugs Bo in the nose. The self-proclaimed face of this company doesn’t go down, instead staggering backwards. Apparently one punch isn’t enough to satisfy Baron, and he spears Bohmeoth into the Halloween Themed backdrop. The entire thing tumbles to the ground, along with the two big men. Before a full on brawl can break out, officials rush onto the scene to separate the two men. BOHEMOTH You’re dead, Windels! I want you to know that! BARON Any time you wanna rumble, come find me! SARA Holy cow, what a first day on the job! Its all your, guys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 We cut back to a shocked and elated Sofa Central. COACH Mmmmmmm. Alf throwin' the money in all the right directions! Girl be looking fine! COLE It's great to finally meet our new interview personality, and we look forward to working with her. COACH We sure as hell do!I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seats... I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights, slashed a hole in all 4 tires... Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats. Summoned by the sounds of “Before He Cheats” by Carrie Underwood, the chap wearing, corn chewing, cowgirl hat sporting, guitar carrying, Melissa Nerdly dances her way onto the entrance stage. She offers the crowd a warm smile on her way down the entrance ramp. In return many of them offer her the middle finger. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall and is for the OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, the challenger. Now residing in Nashville, Tennessee, by way of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada... this is “CANADIAN COUNTRY” MMMEEEELLLLLLIIIISSSSSAAAAAA... NNEEEEEERRRRRRDDLLLLLYYYYYYYYYY!!! COLE Melissa Nerdly is fame and attention starved. She wants so bad to be thought of as a country singer, she’ll sink to any depth to achieve that goal. Even attacking her opponent tonight with a guitar. COACH Melissa’s a go-getter, Mikey Cole. She sees the spotlight hanging nearby and she’s gonna go it for herself. Can’t blame her for being ambitious. Melissa enters the ring and dances for the audience. And not in a sexy way either, more in a way that enrages the fans with each and every step."Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) And you don’t care what they say See, every time you turn around They screamin' your name Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy) And you don’t care what they say See, every time you turn around They screamin' your name" The Vegas’ crowd put forth a large reaction to “When I Grow Up” the famous entrance song of Jade Rodez-Duncan. Putting a Halloween flair into her cheerleading outfit by wearing it orange and black, the Women’s Champion fires up the sold out audience. BUFFER And ladies and gentlemen, her opponent! Now residing in Los Angeles, California... she is one half of the OAOAST’S WOMEN’S TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS…the current, reigning and defending, three time, OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION... "LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA"... JJJAAAAAAAADDEEEEEEEEEE... RRRROOOOODDEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZ - DDUUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAANN!!!!! COLE Here comes a girl who has exactly what Melissa Nerdly wants: fame, and adulation. But, unlike Melissa Nerdly, Jade has worked for what’s her’s, she’s earned the respect and adoration of the OAOAST Galaxy! And this past HeldDOWN she and kid sister Maya became the first ever OAOAST Women's Tag Team Champions. Jade slides into the squared circle, eyed down by Melissa. Jade isn’t one to be intimidated or forget past wrongs and glares back at the woman he assaulted her this past HeldDOWN~! DING DING DING An angered Jade lunges for Melissa. But the country singer swings behind her, and captures her inside a side headlock. Melissa wrenches on the hold up until to the point where Jade pushes her into the ropes. The cables shoot Melissa back and she’s caught with an elbow to the jaw by Jade. Little Miss California sees Melissa writhing in pain, and decides to try her hand at a pincover… ONE! Melissa makes the kickout. COLE Jade took a devastating guitar shot after her Women’s Tag Title victory this past HeldDOWN. As nice as Jade is, she’s still got that Duncan temper and I know she wants to make Melissa pay. Melissa rolls to the corner, and then grabs onto the ropes. This forces referee Earl Hebner to keep Jade away from the Nerdly girl. Melissa doesn’t stay grounded for long, however. She comes up to pop her unexpecting (not a word) foe in the jaw with a punch. Melissa takes aim with a several more shots before breaking into a little shuffle. This time waster, allows Jade to sneak behind her and set up for the reverse x-factor. The crowd pops for Jade’s upcoming finisher, but Melissa manages to slither out the hold. She rolls all the way to the outside where she acts as though she has the contest totally under control. COACH Melissa is trying to escape the safety hazard that is Jade’s weight. COLE Stop it. Melissa rolls back into the ring with a lariat aimed at Jade’s head. Jade ducks the attack, and when Melissa turns around she’s rocked with an enziguri to the face! COLE E!ziguri! Melissa falls into the corner, where her enraged rival proceeds to pound her with clubbing forearms. After backing away, she looks out for The Little People with a pair of running knees. But Melissa slides out the way, and JRD is forced to smack the turnbuckle posts with her knees. Rather than capitalize on Jade’s miss, Melissa decides to attend to her aching back. This is an error that Jade makes her pay for with a dropkick. COLE What great elevation by the Women’s Champion, who’s looking to put this rude challenger in her place. Melissa rolls into the corner to once again force Jade to give her five seconds of rest. Jade isn’t willing to do so and has to be held back by the referee. With Jade distracted, Melissa pounces upon her with a hard punch. She then grabs onto Jade’s blond hair and throws her into the top turnbuckle. Jade is dizzied by this attack, and unable to defend against Melissa giving her an Achy Breaky Back with a cross arm lung blower! The cover… ONE! NO! COLE Only a two count off that big move by Melissa. Jade’s a very tough girl. COACH Of course she is, she’s a Duncan. COLE Pierce would get pinned off a fireman’s carry. Melissa goes to pick Jade off the canvas, only to be beaten away by a pair of punches to the stomach. Jade lets out a mighty yell, before charging forward at Melissa. But Melissa swings around for a spinning heel kick! Another pinfall is attempted… ONE! TWO! Jade performs the kickout! COLE Jade has the championship advantage. She’s been in big time matches many times before, this is the biggest match Melissa has ever been in. She had a title match last month, but if she doesn’t win here, its going to be a long way back to title contention. COACH I think she’s performing great. She’s a great singer, a great song writer, and a great wrestler! COLE Your third statement is the only one that isn’t highly debatable. Melissa tangles Jade inside a figure four leg lock. Jade immediately screams out in pain as the submission’s effects begin to set in. COACH Melissa was taught that move by none other than Randy Travis! COLE ….What?! Jade fights and fights, trying her hardest to escape the deadly hold. Just as all hope appears to be lost for the champion, she manages to summon enough strength to break free of the hold. COLE Good thing for Jade that she got out, because she wasn’t anywhere near the ropes. Jade and Melissa hop to their feet with Melissa striking with a boot to Jade’s stomach. The country singer attempts to lift Jade up for a pump handle slam, but hasn’t the strength needed to do that. Instead she clutches her now sore back and whines about Jade weighing too much. JADE Jade attempts to slam Melissa to the ground, but the challenger manages to surprise her with a small package… ONE! TWO! Jade falls out the pinning predicament. COACH Who do you think is gonna come to Melissa’s victory party? I bet all the country legends will be there. What about Reba McEntire? You think she’ll be there? COLE I think she’ll be lucky if her own parents show up. Melissa springs upright, but has to duck low to avoid a clothesline. She sweeps behind Jade, and hooks her up for a front Russian leg sweep. Jade tries to fight out the hold, but Melissa succeeds in executing the move. COLE Number One with a Bullet! Melissa lays across Jade for the pinfall… ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! “JADE! JADE! JADE!” Las Vegas sings. The target of the fans’ love crawls to the ropes, and tries to use them to pull herself upright. She’s kept grounded by a kick to the ribs from Melissa’s glittery boots. This kick sends Jade into the corner, where Melissa hammers her with over hand rights. Once the shots bring Jade to her knees, Melissa begins stomping her in the stomach. MELISSA My mistake, darling, I forgot you’ve got a whole heaping of blubber to shield those blows. JADE Jade gets to her feet, ready to get revenge for Melissa’s cruel words. But the Edmonton native keeps her trapped in the corner with a series of swift punches to the chin. Hebner warns Melissa over the closed fists, and Melissa responds with a sweet innocent smile. COACH How can you hate on a woman with such a beautiful smile? COLE Its rather easy. Melissa runs in on Jade with a big boot! But Jade slides out the way and Melissa is painfully hung up on the top rope. She pulls herself away from the turnbuckles, only to be hit by a running lariat from the champion! COLE This is what Melissa does not want to see, a fired up Jade Rodez-Duncan! Jade bounces off the ropes, coming back to nail Melissa in the face with a dropkick! Melissa scrambles upright, but is caught within a front facelock. Jade signals for a tornado DDT, drawing a pop from the crowd. She swings around, but Melissa is able to shove her away. Jade looks off balance, and the country icon sees this as an opportunity to charge in. But when she reaches Jade, the Duncan girl throws her into the air with a back body drop! JADE COME ON~! “JADE! JADE! JADE!” Melissa crawls onto the corner. She slowly makes her way to her feet, and sags against the turnbuckle posts. Much to her horror Jade comes surging in with a pair of knees that connect with her chest! COLE Jade is Always Thinking of the Little People! Jade grabs onto Melissa’s arm and attempts to shoot her into the far corner. But, Melissa reverses the hold and Jade is tossed against the turnbuckles. The Nerdly kid dashes in with a body splash. However, Jade gets her boot up to back Melissa away. COACH She could’ve knocked her teeth out! You can’t be a country star with no teeth. Jade attempts to scoop slam Melissa, but Melissa clubs her down to a knee. She takes aim, and smashes her knee into the side of Jade’s head. With Jade stunned, Melissa bounces off the ropes. Upon returning, her legs travel in a bicycle motion and slam into Jade’s face! COLE She calls that bicycle kick Hell on Heels! COACH New champion, Mikey Cole! Melissa pins Jade with a broad smile on her face… ONE! TWO! THREE! NO!!!! KICKOUT! “JADE! JADE! JADE!” MELISSA (to the referee) Excuse me, darlin, but you must’ve made some sort of mistake! Hebner assures Melissa no mistake was made, and the country star is forced to resign herself to the fact that the match continues. COACH My expert advice- COLEExpert? COACH Would be for Melissa to go for that Hell on Heels kick one more time. Melissa has similar thoughts to Coach as she gets a run off the ropes. But when she comes back with the kick, Jade catches onto her silver boot in order to shove her away. Melissa is left dazed and flustered by the miss, giving Jade the chance she needs to head off the ropes and connect with her running sleeper drop! COLE That’s Sweet Dreams for Melissa Nerdly! The cover… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! Melissa gets the shoulder up! “THAT WAS THREE! THAT WAS THREE! THAT WAS THREE!” Jade awaits for Melissa to get to her feet. When the dizzied country star finally does, Jade hits a right/left combo of punches. She twirls around for a spinning clothesline but Melissa is nowhere to be found! Rather, she’s being dragged out the ring by SUGAR BELLE and her cousin DECEMBER. COLE What’s going on? A dazed Melissa is hauled up the entrance ramp by the two gorgeous ladies, much too Jade and the audience’s consternation. Jade watches with hands on hips as Melissa is carried further and further away. COLE Melissa is being carried away by the Belle Cousins! Jade decides she doesn’t wish to win retain her title on a forfeit due to cowardice. As such he hurries out the ring, and rushes to the escaping trio. She dives into them, sending all four girls crashing to the ground on the graveyard. Sugar is first up, and is highly enraged. SUGAR You want some of me? Bring it on! Part of the reason for her boldness is that December is standing behind Jade. The tall blond spins the shorter blond around and takes aim with a punch. But, Jade blocks the blow, and begins hammering December with foreams! COACH She’s beating people up in a graveyard. That’s disrespectful to the dead! People have their families buried there and she’s throwing down! COLE What the heck are you taking about?! After December goes down, Sugar jumps onto Jade’s back. Her intent is to choke her with a sleeper, but the plan fails as Jade simply chucks her forward. COACH Jade’s getting dirt on the Belle’s beautiful outfits. How are they supposed to perform on the post show on OAOAST.com? COLE Let’s hope they don’t! Jade grabs Melissa by the hair and pulls her upright. With Melissa screaming in panic, Jade drags her all the way back to the ring. She throws her inside the squared circle and then enters herself. Melissa decides she must fight back, and starts stomping at Jade. Little Miss California fights to her feet, and proceeds to belt Melissa in the throat with uppercuts. MELISSA NOT MY THROAT! MY VOICEBOX! MY VOICEBOX! Melissa throws out a desperation lariat, which is easily ducked by Jade. The women’s champion gets a hold of Melissa’s chin, marking the set up for her reverse X-factor! But Melissa counters with a sitout jawbreaker! The cover… ONE! TWO! Kickout! “LET’S GO JADE! LET’S GO JADE! LET’S GO JADE!” MELISSA Hell On Heels, baby! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” As Jade steps to her feet, the country singer throws out her signature bicycle kick! She connects perfectly and Jade goes down in a heap. The Vegas crowd is frightened as Jade is pinned… ONE! TWO! THREE! NO! JADE KICKSOUT! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE Unbelievable! Jade kicks out of the Hell On Heels for a second time! Melissa chooses not to argue with the official, instead heading to the corner. She climbs onto the top rope, raises her arms and takes flight with a superfly splash! However, Jade gets her knees up, making Melissa’s landing an unfortunate one. COACH Melissa’s not doughy like Jade, she doesn’t have a layer of fat to protect her. COLE Stop it. We’ve all seen that Jade is just as fit as any girl in the OAOAST. Jade and Melissa climb to their feet and immediately begin firing off punches. Melissa launches a flash Hell on Heels kick that’s narrowly sidestepped by Jade. Jade grabs Melissa beneath the chin, readying the reverse x-factor. But Melissa counters by slipping Jade onto her shoulders. However before she can execute an attack, Jade slithers out for a rollup… ONE! TWO! Melissa reverses the pin! ONE! MELISSA PUTS HER COWGIRL BOOTS ON THE ROPES! TWO! THREE! DING DING DING “Before He Cheats” is a fitting victory song, as Melissa has just cheated her way to a title victory. BUFFER Your winner and new OAOAST Women’s Champion….MELISSA NERDLY! The crowd pepper the ring with boos and ill words, unable to believe Melissa has gotten the title. Melissa herself can scarcely believe it. She sits on her knees, eyes wide and mouth held open in a delighted shock. COLE Melissa has just earned her first Women’s Title! And I use the word earned loosely. She cheated! COACH It don’t matter how you win, just as long as you do. And Melissa won, and this has got to be her big break. The Belle Cousins enter the ring with bright smiles on their faces. They run over to hug the new champion and celebrate her huge triumph. “BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!” Jade realizes what Melissa’s done, and it does not sit well with her. Unlike the crowd, who can only chant their rage, Jade can seek revenge on the one who wronged her. She once again jumps the country singing trio, knocking them all to the ground. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Melissa wisely bails with her title, leaving her backup singers to handle the former champion. Jade rocks Sugar with a right left combo, and then drops her with a lariat. Adding to Sugar’s woe, her cousin is body slammed onto her! COLE Jade won’t take this lying down! Sugar rolls to her feet and gets hit with more punches. She tries to coverup, but is eventually knocked to the ground by a massive haymaker. COACH Stop it, Jade, they can’t perform with a black eye! Jade turns around to deal with December. The problem is December is ready for her, and takes her onto her shoulders. She swings her around for an F-5 into a Rock Bottom! COACH What was that?! COLE Wake Me Up When December Ends! Melissa sees that Jade has been left defeated, and decides that her rival must be further humiliated. She grabs her glittering red guitar and then slides into the ring. MELISSA Hold her up, girls! We gotta learn her her lesson! Melissa takes a few practice swings with the guitar, taking her time as she wants to make sure Jade is awake to see her doom. But, all this does is allow MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD to start speeding down the ramp. COLE Here comes Maya! SUGAR Hurry up, Melissa! Melissa follows Sugar’s words and swings the guitar at Jade in a wild motion. The problem is it doesn’t hit Jade. It hits Maya, who had jumped in front of Jade to save her from being plastered with the musical instrument. “OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” SUGAR AND DECEMBER MELISSA COACH Ooooooooooooooooh shit. Melissa not only abandons her shattered guitar, and not only abandons the ring, she abandons her title as she runs away in a panicked stricken state. Luckily Sugar gathers up the title before she and December also beat a hasty retreat. COLE Melissa intended on hitting Jade, but she connected with Maya who had selflessly dove in front of Jade to protect her. A worried Jade attends to her sister, as backstage officials fill the ring to perform the same action. COLE We can only hope that Maya is ok after that heinous attack by Melissa and The Belle’s. COACH Yo, dawg, Krista’s gonna get up in all three of their asses! And I don’t mean in the way we usually associate female butts with Krista.NOVEMBER REIGNTHE THANKSGIVING WEEKEND TRADITIONLIVE FROM CHARLOTTE, NC NOVEMBER 27thCOMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 The lights go out as “Amazing” by Kanye West featuring Young Jeezy plays as Reject walks down the aisle. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, representing THE CHURCH OF ABDULLAH... from the Bronx, weighing 230 pounds... RRRRRREEEEEJECT!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Once in the ring, Reject stares out into the OAOAST Galaxy with disdain. COLE The utter contempt Reject has for the OAOAST Galaxy is exactly how Big Papa Thrust feels towards him. As we learned, nobody lays a finger on the Big Bad Glutei Daddy’s freakazoids. Especially his #1 freakazoid in Oohlala. COACH Big overreaction on Big Papa Thrust’s part if you ask me. COLE Nobody did. COACH Well I’m telling you. The guy overreacted and now he’s gonna get beat down in front of his lady. “Big Pimpin‘” by Jay-Z hits and Big Papa Thrust is led out to the ring by the buxom Oohlala. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied by the lovely Oohlala… BIG PAPPPAAAA THRUST!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BPT climbs into the ring and flexes the largest arms in the galaxy from the middle rope. COLE Listen to this ovation for Big Papa Thrust! Reject yanks BPT down from the middle rope and trash talk ensues. * DINGDINGDING * The bell sounds and Reject gains the early advantage thanks to a knee to the gut out of a tie-up. Reject then introduces BPT to the turnbuckle and unloads in the corner with a series of RVD-style kicks, until BPT turns the tables. * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BPT whips Reject across for a corner clothesline, but Reject moves and executes a German suplex! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! To the top goes Reject, only for BPT to swipe his legs out from under and crotch him! REJECT BPT quickly capitalizes with a middle rope Samoan drop! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! COACH What action, Mikey Cole. COLE Big Papa Thrust and Reject aren’t working by the hour, ladies and gentlemen. They want to win and win now. COACH You gotta believe the longer the match goes the more it favors Reject. COLE I’m sure Big Papa Thrust’s freakazoids would disagree with that assessment. Reject gets sent for the ride and damn near is taken around the world in a tilt-a-whirl, but he lands on his feet and catches BPT with a DDT! The cover. ONE! TWO! THR-- KICKOUT! Reject shoves BPT in the corner and gets a little payback from earlier. * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" * CHOP * "WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" A smirk on his face, Reject delivers one final chop and then snap mares BPT out of the corner. A big knee drop follows and so too does the cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Frustrated with his inability to put BPT away, Reject applies a choke and even takes a swipe Oohlala. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE There’s no need for that. COACH Reject’s only letting Oohlala know he hasn’t forgotten about her. He doesn’t want her trying anything funny. Reject turns his attention back to BPT and walks into a fireman’s carry takeover. The Big Bad Glutei Daddy proceeds to pummel Reject, who escapes but not far enough as BPT shoots him in and performs a military press slam. A big elbow follows and then a double underhook power bomb. With his foe in a world of hurt BPT signals the end is here. COLE Will Reject take a seat on the Lay-Z-Boy? The answer to that question is no, as Reject thumbs BPT in the eye and dumps him outside. ONE! TWO! THREE! Despite the ongoing count, Reject leaps off the apron to deliver a double axe handle… only to be caught in midair and splattered in the aisle courtesy of a release overhead belly-to-belly suplex! COACH Both men might not be able to make it back in the ring following that, Mikey Cole. A double count ensues as BPT and Reject remain laid out on the arena floor. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! Both men finally begin to stir, with BPT the first to reach the apron… FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! …but Reject pulls his leg and the two open fire on each other. EIGHT! NINE! TEN!!! * DINGDINGDING * The sound of the bell isn’t enough to stop BPT and Reject from fighting. It’s only until reinforcements are called is order restored. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has counted out both superstars. Therefore, this bout is ruled a DOUBLE COUNTOUT! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Like the OAOAST Galaxy, BPT doesn’t like the decision. Reject, however, seems indifferent. Though he didn’t win, he didn’t lose either. COLE It was a physically grueling contest while it lasted, but as you heard, the official decision is a double count out. COACH Considering how hard both guys were battling, it only seems right neither lost. Although we both know Reject would’ve gone the done job had the match continued. COLE We’ll have to agree to disagree on that. But stay with us, ladies and gentlemen. The fifth annual OAOAST Halloween Spectacular will return!COMING UP NEXT BURIED ALIVE MATCHALIX MARIA SPEZIA VS ODIN NEXT!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 We return to live action with our view focused on ring announcer Michael Buffer. BUFFER The following contest is a BURIED ALIVE MATCH! In order to win a competitor must place their opponent in the open grave atop the entrance stage and bury them in dirt! Atreyu’s hard rocking “You Were a King Now You’re Unconscious” brings a “waterfall” of blue smoke from the area above the entry way. Odin strides into the macabre setting with arms out stretched and lips cured into a large smile. BUFFER Introducing first, from Asgard….weighing two hundred fifty pounds, he is “THE GOD OF WAR”….OOOOOOODDDDDIIIIIINNNNNNNN! COLE Coach, we’ve seen Alix beat Odin before, we saw her beat CPA, we saw a frustrated Odin somehow set cars on fire because he was angered at Alix. Do you believe Alix is inside Odin’s head? COACH You talk like Odin is a normal man. He’s a god. The only thing in his head are thoughts of taking control of The OAOAST Galaxy. COLE But Alix still stands in his way. After entering the ring, Odin roars and raises his fist to the sky. This causes white pyro to rocket out each turnbuckle. SNOOP DOGGGreetings loved ones Lets take a journey KATY PERRYCalifornia girls We're unforgettable Daisy Dukes Bikinis on top Sun-kissed skin So hot Will melt your popsicle Oooooh Oh Oooooh California girls We're undeniable Fine, fresh, fierce We got it on lock West coast represent Now put your hands up Oooooh Oh Oooooh An orange neon lit bar slides onto stage with some unusual patrons. Present are Frankenstein, Dracula, Mike Meyers, a man in a Scream costume, Jason, and Freddy Krueger. Serving drinks to all these frightening characters without fearing for her safety is Alix Maria Spezia. Once she realizes she’s arrived at her destination, she blows a kiss to the camera and super imposed red lips pop up on screen. BUFFER And the opponent, from Los Angeles, California, she is THE HOLLYWOOD BAD GIRL…..ALIX MARIA SPEEEZZZZIIIAAAAAAA! COLE Alix Maria Spezia gives up a ton of weight and ton of size to Odin. But ask her if that matters and you’ll get a strong no. Alix has beaten the baddest of the bad in the OAOAST, and Odin does not intimidate her in the least. Alix steps onto the top turnbuckle to flash the peace sign to the heavily costumed audience. DING DING DING ALIX Oh my god! Story time! ODIN It is no time for story! It is time for combat! ALIX You’ll never guess who I had lunch with last Tuesday! Go ahead and guess anyway. ODIN I do not care who you dined with. ALIX Come on, guess! Charles Robinson, you guess to. He’s really famous. ROBINSON Um, Tom Cruise. ALIX Close, but no. ROBINSON George Clooney. ALIX Not with the restraining order against me. Keep guessing. ODIN This is absurd! ROBINSON Leonardo DiCaprio. ALIX Boy, I wish! I felt so bad for him when his little ship with all his friends sunk way back in the 90’s, I think he’s still hurting over that. But, I’ll go ahead and tell you. I had lunch with former president Ronald Regan! ROBINSON I think he’s dead. ALIX Not if you’re high! Awesome! Ok! Let’s fight! Alix runs at Odin with a shoulder tackle. Unsurprisingly, she isn’t able to move Odin a single inch. The God of War laughs at Alix’s failure before deciding to show her true power. He backs into the ropes, and then comes back with a shoulder tackle…that fails to move Alix! Amazed, Odin stands with jaw agape. He assumes that was pure luck and retries his shoulder tackle. ALIX THE POWER OF CHRIST RUNS THROUGH ME! Odin is outraged at Alix’s ability to simply shrug off his attacks. His frustrations lead him to slam his boot into her stomach. This doubles her over, and he’s finally able to knock her to the ground with an uppercut to the throat. COLE Imagine an OAOAST Galaxy controlled by Odin. He’d be even less popular than Gaddafi! COACH Maybe so, but you wouldn’t see Odin go out like a bitch and getting hit by some dude’s shoe and sodomized. Odin grabs Alix by her coffee colored hair, and uses that grip to repeatedly slam her into the turnbuckle posts. Once that series of strikes is over, Odin begins ramming his shoulder into Alix’s midsection. He then hurls her into the opposite corner where she smashes against the ring posts. The Asgardian’s long legs carry him across the ring, and allow him to attack Alix with a corner lariat. Alix sinks down to the canvas, which gives Odin the opportunity needed to choke her with his boot. Robinson gives Odin to the count of five to break apart his choke. It’s a count that Odin pushes the limits of. But, he does release Alix, leaving her behind to gag and wheeze. COACH Here’s the problem for Alix. Odin can knock her out in the ring, and he ain’t gonna have any problem carrying her to the grave. Alix can knock out Odin in the ring, and she’ll never get him into the grave! Odin watches Alix use the ropes to pull herself upright. When she’s fully standing, The God of War stomps over to her to grab her by the waist. He raises her into the air for a back suplex attempt. But, The Hollywood Bad Girl flings herself out the hold. Odin swings around and encounters a dropkick that dumps him into the ropes. ALIX So check it, I go over Julia Louise Dreyfus’ house for a little bit on Wednesday and I turn on the TV, and sit down and watch it and she gets hella pissed. ROBINSON Why would she get mad at that? ALIX Something about it being 3 AM, and breaking down a door, ordering porn on pay per view, and being naked. Just stupid complaints like that. Alix decides her story is done and dashes for Odin. Well recovered, the big man is able to upend her over the ropes. Thankfully, the sexy Latina is able to land on the ring apron. She raises her left leg, and kicks Odin in the face to stun him. As he stumbles back to the center of the ring, the former world champion climbs to the top rope. ALIX Normally when a little person like me does a cross body block to a big person like him something bad happens to the little person. But, that could NEVER happen to me! Alix leaps from the top rope and to no one’s amazement is caught by Odin from her cross body block. ALIX Oh poopie. Odin steps towards the edge of the ring, and then casually dumps Alix to the outside. COLE And out goes Alix to the exact place Odin needs her to go to get her in the grave. Odin steps over the ropes in classic big man style to exit the ring. Reaching Alix, he throws her into black steel steps. The steps are dislodged and Alix wails in agony. Her moment of misery is extended when Odin drops her stomach first onto the steel guardrail. COACH Odin clearly wants to punish Alix before he throws her into the grave. COACH And takes control of the OAOAST Galaxy. Odin pulls Alix away from the guardrail, as the nearby fans assail him with insults. He continues to aggravate them by throwing Alix into the announce table. COLE Right into our desk! COACH Yo, Alf sentenced Alix to death when he asked her to fight DA BASED GAWD~! Odin marches over to Alix, ready to cause her more bodily harm. But, the Los Angeles native has other ideas, throwing a PUMPKIN from the patch at Odin. The orange object hits Odin in the face, dazing him. Alix takes advantage of this by hitting him in the face with another pumpkin! Suddenly, she grows incredibly panicked and begins putting the pumpkins back in order. ROBINSON What are you doing, Alix? ALIX If I screw up the Pumpkin Patch the Great Pumpkin will never come! Linus will be sooooooooo pissed at me, he’ll never let me hold his blanket. After assuring things are well situated for a character that isn’t even real inside its own fictional universe, Alix returns to the task of pummeling Odin. A charge leads to Odin upending her towards the steel steps. Pleasing the fans, she’s able to land on the small staircase. From there she back flips at Odin. Once again, The God Of War catches her within his large arms. The ruler of Asgard smiles a broad smile as he runs Alix’s back into the steel ring posts. COACH I’m looking forward to an OAOAST Galaxy ruled by Odin. COLE I don’t see how someone can rule a Galaxy in the first place. Secondly, I don’t see how some could rule a professional wrestling Galaxy without being world champion. After dumping Alix back into the ring, Odin climbs to the top turnbuckle. This sends a buzz of anticipation through the sold out audience. They’re treated to the sight of the big man flying with a lariat! Alix sees the attack coming and ducks bellow it. The God of War rolls through the avoidance, and then promptly pops up. Facing away from Alix, he can’t stop the bubbly babe from dropkicking him in the back. This shoves him into the corner, which spits him back to the center of the ring. Alix leaps onto the top rope, springboarding back to hit Odin with a flipping neckbreaker! The cover… The cover?!!! ROBISON Alix, you can’t pin your opponent in a Buried Alive Match. ALIX Soooooooooo, I can bury him with dirt, probably suffocating him and killing him, but I can’t gently lay my arm across his chest for three seconds? Gotcha! Alix settles herself on pulling Odin off the mat. She tags him with several kicks to the legs, weakening him and allowing her to hit a hurricanrana! Odin springs to his feet with great speed and throws out a lariat. Alix counters by dipping low and then jumping up to crack Odin with an enziguri! Odin staggers backwards, falling through the ropes to the outside. “LET’S GO ALIX! LET’S GO ALIX! LET’S GO ALIX!” The recipient of the audience’s cheers heads to the outside to deal with Odin. She quickly encounters a problem; Odin is retreating up the ring ramp. COLE So much for the great conquest of the OAOAST Galaxy! Alix rushes towards Odin, jumping onto his back! Odin becomes greatly annoyed by Alix’s presence, but easily deals with her, by throwing her off. He continues walking up the ramp until he reaches the stage’s graveyard. There he shows off his impressive strength by removing a tombstone! COACH DA BASED GAWD wasn’t running away, he was just getting himself a weapon to knock Alix out. Odin raises the tombstone high above his head as he approaches Alix. After lining her up, he lowers the tombstone with murderous intent. Alix allows the worried crowd to breathe easy, by slipping out the way. This snaps the tombstone in half once it crashes into the ground. Odin is irate and stomps back up the entrance stage. Alix follows his path, and once she nears him launches her body at him. This is enough to shove him to the ground, and he rolls through the entrance doors to the backstage area. COLE I don’t believe this is a smart move by Odin, Alix is fairly creative with what she can do and her mischievous mind can find all sorts of things to torment Odin with. Case in point Alix grabs a format sheet from the table and begins reading it. ALIX Printed October 30th 2:58 PM. Odin Vs Alix: Buried Alive Match, Zack Malibu Vs Todd Cortez Vs Jason Silver….oh my god that’s what’s really happening, this thing can predict the future! Bow before our true god, you blasphemer! Alix forces Odin to begin worshipping the format sheet that can predict the future that everyone already knew about in the first place. Luckily for Odin, Terry Taylor’s arrival onto the scene distracts her. ALIX Cool! Terry! Hey, why don’t you have that thing Krista gave you? She spent a lot of money at Pet-Co on that chew toy. TERRY Alix, you should focus on beating down Odin and getting someone to help you drag him to the grave so you can bury him. ALIX That’s great advice, I didn’t think that Alpo dog food Krista feeds you would make you smarter but it really does! Alix and Terry’s conversation is interrupted by Odin roaring to life with a punch to Alix’s face. This knocks her onto the table, but she’s quick to roll off. She can’t escape Odin’s wrath, however, as he grabs her hair and drags her down the hallway. COACH Don’t sleep on Odin, dawg, if he can light cars on fire with a snap of the fingers he can easily find a steel chair to beat Alix with. Odin throws Alix into the wall, stunning her for the moment. He raises his boot and aims it at her head. But Alix counters by slipping out the way and Odin meets with frustrating failure. Showcasing her aforementioned creativity, Alix grabs a mop out a bucket and jams the dirty object into Odin’s face. While Odin is coping with the horrible smell and grime, Alix swings around to boot him in the stomach. This doubles him over, and Alix is able to DDT him into the bucket full of dirty, disgusting water! COLE That’s just humiliating for a man that considers himself to be a god! Alix ducks inside a nearby room as Odin is on the verge of puking. She emerges with a large trash can and a steel chair. After putting the trash can onto Odin’s head, Alix sits down on the chair and reads an imaginary newspaper. ALIX OAOAST Stock Up Eighty Points after crazy man that thinks he’s a god gets dumped in pee water, and has trash can full of used condoms dumped on his head. Interesting! Alix folds up her newspaper, but is frustrated by the lack of recycle bin to throw it away. Brushing aside this fact, she smashes the steel chair into the trash can. This knocks Odin over, and sends him rolling away in embarrassment. COLE Odin needs to get things back to the ring where Alix doesn’t have nearly as many options and ways to fight him. Odin shrugs off the trashcan, but is furious over his unfortunate ordeal. Were he able to see the debris that hangs off his long blond hair, he’d all the more upset. ALIX Dude, you really look terrible. And your natural odor of rotten blue cheese has been replaced by the odor of rotten blue cheese in a toxic waste dump. You have got to do something that Christian Wright’s mother never does, and that’s take a shower! Let’s go! ODIN I will not take a shower in the middle of combat! I will destroy you! ALIX Oh you’re gonna take a shower! Move it! Alix begins swinging the steel chair at Odin in an effort to get him to move in the direction she wants. This tactic proves successful as a worried Odin is put on the backfoot. He tries to parry Alix’s strikes, but faced a chair swinging mad woman, he’s forced into the nearest shower. Inside the shower is the stunned face of ….MORGAN NERDLY and the much calmer, but still shocked…MAGGIE NERDLY MAGGIE Ho-ly shit! Alix! And a camera crew! And Odin! COLE Oh my! COACH God bless you Papa Nerdly! ALIX Whoo-hooo! The day started with me selling my first born to Tony Tourettes in exchange for some Laffy Taffy, it ends with me dumping a bunch of dirt on a guy who looks half-homeless half-’s rockstar, and smack dab in the middle is me grabbing Morgan and Maggie’s big ol breasts! Who’s up first? MAGGIE Morgan, you look like you need a good fondling. You go first. MORGAN Stay…away! ALIX TO MORGAN MORGAN Get off! ALIX Oh, believe me, I'm getting off! But, you’re right, this is all wrong. I’ve gotta get naked to! Sadly she can’t undress as Odin rushes to spear her into the wall. Morgan watches with fright, as Odin takes aim with what’s to be a devastating punch. But Alix kicks his arm away, stunning him. She’s able to bring him down to the shower floor with a drop toe hold. From there she backs away, building up a head of steam and punting him in the side of the head! Odin flips over onto his back, his face showing extreme exhaustion and hurt from this unusual ordeal. MORGAN Alix…you…you…can’t bring a guy in here! ALIX Why not? MAGGIE Well, for many reasons. Like the fact that it’s a Women’s Shower. Actually that’s the only reason. But its still a good reason. ALIX But its perfect, you’re here, I’m here, you’re half naked, he’s kinda cute. Let’s hump him! MORGAN What? ALIX Yeah, it’ll be fun! I’ll get rammed by his “holy spear” while I munch on your fur pie and Maggie can sample both our milk jugs! MORGAN What? No! No! No! MAGGIE Uh, Alix I don’t know how you’d grind hips with someone who isn’t really with it. ALIX Are you kidding me? I can’t tell you how many times, I’ve bashed Hugh Jackman over the head only to jump his bones while he’s still groggy. Look lemme show you how you do it. MAGGIE Alix, that’s not a good idea! You know that could be thought of as rape! ALIX Well, I’ll use a practice dummy! Alix quickly darts out the room. MAGGIE Forget getting dressed let’s get out of here before she gets- ALIX Back! Alix affixes a “marital aid” to the shower wall. ALIX So we’ll just prop him up and… Like magic! COACH I think I’m going to faint! Maggie looks on amazed, while Morgan rightly panics at being trapped with this sex crazed maniac. Luckily the other maniac in the room comes to her “rescue” by swinging a back scratcher at Alix. It hits her in the head, riddling her dazed. ODIN I grow tired of these foolish games! ALIX That’s a song. By Jewel. For a homeless man, you’re pretty with it. ODIN I am not homeless! I reside in a palace in Asgard! Odin lifts Alix into a gorilla press position, readying to throw her against the wall. But Alix counters by slipping out Odin’s back, and shoving him into the wall. Odin’s head smacks against the tile. He turns around, and his nailed beneath the chin with a leaping kick by Alix. This drops him to a seated position as he’s slumped against the wall. ALIX Oh, I get it, Morgan. You want something more festive for the holiday! So, instead we'll bob for apples. MORGAN I...I...think I can do that. ALIX So we just pull down and his pants and we've got two mini-apples staring us right in the face! MORGAN No! No! ALIX Well, at least hand me the soap so I can clean this mess cat up! Morgan decides she can at least do that, and passes Alix the liquid body soap. Apparently not used to bathing another person, Alix just dumps the soap on Odin’s head. ALIX All done! See-ya later, girls! Morgan, tell Leon I said hi! Morgan is left behind shell shocked and disturbed, as Alix guides Odin out the shower. Maggie just shrugs her shoulders, used to Alix's hyper-sexed behavior. COLE That was an adventure! COACH That was our DVD sales going through the roof! Out in the hallway, Alix hooks Odin into a front facelock. Her (foolish) idea is to suplex him over. But before this plan can even start to go awry, Melody appears. MELODY Alix, weight detection is on in this game. You won’t be able to suplex him. ALIX Oh! Silly me, I totally forgot about the weight detection feature. Thanks. Melody disappears from wherever the hell she came from, and Alix abandons her suplex effort. She settles for painstakingly dragging Odin all the way to the collection of makeup tables. FRAN THE MAKEUP LADY Howdy, Alix. ALIX Fran The Makeup Lady! The woman who wore the bull dyke haircut before it became awesome to wear the bull dyke haircut! Yes! I’ve always thought you had a pretty cool job, its like decorating cakes, only you can’t eat the cake afterwards. That African child I sponsored once would, though. He ate his whole village. Sad. Anyway back to the match! Alix grabs some powder and then flings it into Odin’s face. This completely blinds the God Of War, and he starts wildly swinging through the air. Alix catches onto his arm, and slams it onto the table. He recoils backwards, falling into one of the makeup chairs, and toppling to the ground. ALIX What would you say his color is, Fran? FRAN For sure an antique fuchsia. ALIX You’re the expert! Alix gathers up an antique fuchsia lipstick for her artistic endeavors. She scribbles across Odin’s face, with the serious look of someone conducting a life altering science experiment. Once she’s done, Odin is revealed to have fuchsia whiskers drawn onto him. COLE Do you think Odin is regretting crawling out the ring? Odin gets to his feet, where he sees his whiskers in the mirror. ODIN Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Beyond outraged, The God Of War turns over the makeup table nearest Fran and Alix. ODIN What have you done to me?! ALIX It was Fran’s idea. Odin doesn’t buy this lie and lunges for Alix. The shifty cutie steps out the way, and then dashes away. ODIN Return here at once! Odin charges after Alix, determined to make her pay for defacing his handsome visage. She zips and dodges through the crowd in the hallway as she and Odin perform a cat and mouse game. COLE Alix is fast I don’t know if Odin is going to be able to catch her. Alix dashes into Alfdogg’s office and slams the door shut behind her. Alfdogg isn’t present at this moment. Were he, he might be inclined to be perturbed about Odin kicking down the door. Alix is more concerned with fish in the office. ALIX Why does Alf bring these fish to every city we go to? Why does he even have fish? You know they eat each other. What kinda pet is that? We have a Yorkshire Terrier, would we buy a Golden Retriever if he’s gonna eat the Yorkie? No, of course not. Having lulled Odin into a sense of boredom with her mini-rant, Alix picks up a framed picture of Anglesault. She raises it high over head, and then lowers onto Odin’s head! Odin is furious, and he’s even more upset when Alix takes a bust of Anglesault and smashes over his head! COACH Does Alf have a secret thing for Anglesault? A picture is one thing he helped found the company. But a bust? Naw, nigga, you can’t explain that. Alix takes hold of books off a shelf, and swiftly begins launching them at Odin. As these are hardback books, they should do immeasurable damage to Odin. However, the ruler of Asgard brushes aside each book in his quest punish Alix. The Hollywood Bad Girl realizes her idea of launching reading material at her foe isn’t succeeding and instead launches herself off Alf’s desk with an axe handle smash. Odin easily sidesteps her attack, and latches onto her throat. He can’t, however, hit his chokeslam as Alix kicks him in the leg. Deciding that Alf’s office is no place for a match to take place, Alix rushes out the door. COLE Alix is on the move again and so is Odin! Conquering the OAOAST Galaxy, sure takes a lot of running. The crowd lets out a pop as Alix emerges from the backstage area, quickly followed by a fuming Odin. They head onto the gravesite where Alix pushes her luck severely by attacking Odin with hard kicks to the leg. The God Of War takes these blows in stride, before raising his boot and smacking Alix in the face. The former world champion topples backwards, landing inside the open grave! The crowd begins to fear for her health, safety, and the outcome of this contest as Odin flashes a wide smile. COLE Alix is into the grave, now Odin only has to bury her! Odin goes for the shovel, and upon reaching it begins shoveling dirt onto Alix. COLE That dirt is cold, disgusting and horrible. COACH And its being shoveled onto Alix! “ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” The kindness of the audience is all Alix needs to begin to crawl out the grave. Odin quickly notices her escape plan, and reaches down to try and grab onto her neck. But, Alix counters any efforts for the chokeslam by delivering a well timed low blow! COLE That’s a move even a god is susceptible to! Odin is doubled over in misery and anguish, which allows Alix to gingerly climb out the grave. The barely dressed babe, hooks Odin up inside a side headlock and then flips around with a sommersault neckbreaker! COLE Confessions Of a Kristaholic! A knocked out Odin rolls from the ground and into the grave! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE Bury him Alix! Alix would like to do just that, but before she can reach the shovel its planted into the back of her neck by DETECTIVE TANGO BOSLEY! BOSLEY HELL YEAH! I GOT ME SOME! CPA Shut up and help me get Odin out. Working together, the two strong brawlers manage to pull their lifeless client free of the grave. COLE Don’t tell me its going to end this way! Bosley rolls Alix into the grave, while the crowd deliver a torrent of heat. CPA performs his duties by dumping a wheelbarrow full of dirt onto Alix. Charles Robinson has no choice but to reluctantly make the winner official and calls for the bell. BUFFER Your winner….ODIN! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” CPA and Bosley help Odin to his feet. The God Of War is only slightly aware of his victory. However, its enough awareness for him to break out a small smile. COLE Thanks to VICE, Odin is walking out of Vegas with a victory over the chosen protector of the OAOAST Galaxy. Odin manages to raise his arms in triumph, a gesture that does earn any appreciation from the booing crowd. COACH Whew!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 COLE Ladies and gentlemen, I understand there’s a commotion backstage. We have a camera-- Cole stops in mid-sentence as we cut backstage to find TK and THE HEAVENLY ROCKERS doing a number on MARIACHI and THE ALL-AMERICAN BOYS in the locker room area. COACH Looks like TK and the Heavenly Rockers didn’t want to wait for their match against Mariachi and the All-American Boys. COLE You think? Damn them! This is without a doubt their response to what happened to Abdullah Nerdly earlier this evening. OAOAST officials step in and escort TK and THR out of the locker room. Meanwhile, EMTs tend to Mariachi and the AABs. RANDOM OAOAST OFFICIAL No way they’ll be able to compete tonight. Not in this condition. COLE Forget about tonight. Their careers may be over!COMING UP NEXT OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIPKRISTA ISAODRA DUNCAN VS LANDON MADDIX VS THEODORE MONEYMAKER THE MAINEVENT IS NEXT!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 7, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2013 Give me those bright lights, long nights High rise, over time Give me them bright lights, long nights Party till the sun is rising High rise, over time Working till the moon is shining Hot guys, fly girls Never thought I'd say I feel on top of the world I feel on top of the world Hey "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" A ghoulish gaggle of GHOSTS appear on the stage, bikini clad women in see-through sheets not so much frightening as tantalising. Sweeping through the sea of spirits is the World Champion herself, Krista Isadora Duncan, dressed like thus: COACH BOING! BUFFER And hailing from the unofficial capital of the UNIVERSE, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA!! She is a New York Times best selling author... a reality TV star... the founder of the FIT with KID line of exercise videos... a member of the Hollywood Walk Of Fame... the most desirable woman in Hollywood... a record setting champion in the OAOAST history books... and the reigning, defending, OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION... KRISTA... IIIISSSSSAAADDOOOOOORRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAA... DDUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!!!!!!!!! "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Moneymaker and Landon look on with mixed emotions, ranging from trepidation to lust, as Krista makes her way to the ring and hangs from the ropes. Not unlike a vampire bat. You know, because it's Halloween. Nevermind. COLE Maddix and Moneymaker's attempts to strike a deal with Krista to work together tonight have, unsurprisingly, not gone well. The dinners haven't gone down well. So now, we wonder what sort of dynamic we'll see in this match. Every man and woman for themselves, or will we see some sort of last minute agreement? Setting aside her broomstick, Krista hands over the World Title, looking uneasy at her opponents. Mainly because Landon is trying to get her attention and Moneymaker is... well, staring at her. Both notice each other trying to appeal to Krista and get on each other's case for doing so. *DINGDINGDING* As the bell rings, Maddix and Moneymaker get into a war of words. As they move in on each other and exchange thoughts, both periodically point over at Krista, both apparently trying to claim that Krista has their back. Leant against the ropes, Krista watches on with disinterest. Landon and Moneymaker's war of words finally turns into shoves, at which point Krista decides to step in between and seperate them. KRISTA Alright alright, before you embarrass yourselves. Let's play a game of "who's more desperate to have Krista on their side?" KING LANDON You mean you've changed you mind? KRISTA (looking shiftily) Uhh... yeah, sure. Okay! If you're so desperate for my help to try and win this match, before inevitably attempting to stab me in the back which is apparently going to go unsaid in all of this despite us all knowing the score... then prove it. MONEYMAKER How? KRISTA Kiss. KING LANDON AND MONEYMAKER :huh: KING LANDON I'm sorry, I... I don't quite understand. KRISTA Kiss each other. And I'll judge. Landon and Moneymaker look at each other, then back at Krista to check if she's joking. Which she doesn't appear to be. MONEYMAKER Are you mad, woman!? KRISTA Well, that's a matter of opinion. Now, show me how much I mean to you. Landon and Moneymaker look at each other again, with disgust. Moneymaker seems dead against this idea. Where-as Landon, against his better judgement, looks up to the skies and asks for forgiveness from above, before reluctantly leaning forward. MONEYMAKER Moneymaker slugs Landon with a right hand and knocks him down, saving his manhood in the process. Still shaken up at the thought, Moneymaker is then caught with a spinkick from Krista that takes him out. COACH Man, I dunno. I know Krista good, but are you really that desperate, Landon my man? Seriously? COLE Well, sometimes in life, you have to do certain things to get ahead... COACH COLE I mean, theoretically, of course. Ahem. Picking himself up, Landon sees Moneymaker down and looks expectantly at Krista. KING LANDON So... I win, right? KRISTA Not even a little. Krista delivers an inverted atomic drop to Landon, then sends him off the ropes. A leg lariat cuts Landon down and the self professed King quickly rolls outside to avoid more damage. Krista turns her attention to the real King, catching Moneymaker with a boot as he tries to charge her. A series of kicks to the chest back Moneymaker up against the ropes, before she runs across the ring... and gets TRIPPED by Landon! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Landon soon regrets his intervention as he pulls Krista outside, Krista blocking his right hand attempt and bouncing his face off the ring apron! COLE Krista reminding us all tonight, she doesn't play well with others. COACH Yeah, but she plays well with other people's souls, dignity and physical well-being. Jumping back to the apron Krista is up just in time to catch Moneymaker coming, feeding her shoulder through the ropes. Doubled over, Moneymaker lurches away. Krista then springboards off the top and plants both feet into Moneymaker's spine with a double stomp! COLE Looks like Krista is back to 100% which is bad news for the OAOAST. COACH Especially when she still kicked people's ass at about 70%. Moneymaker rolls outside to lick his wounds, leaving Krista alone in the ring. KRISTA Well, that didn't take long. See you all next month! Finding themselves next to each other on the floor, Maddix and Moneymaker look at each other and seem to strike up an uneasy truce. They climb onto the apron together and stare down Krista, who notices the odds are suddenly against her. COLE Well, it Krista won't work with these two, I guess they'll make their own agreement. COACH Oh, thank you! This is how it should have been all along! Landon climbs into the ring, followed by Moneymaker... ...BUT LANDON LIFTS THE ROPE, CROTCHING MONEYMAKER!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Awww, no! No no no! As Moneymaker flops outside holding his groin, a smirking Landon doesn't notice Krista coming up from behind to deliver a German Suplex! 1... 2... NO! Krista takes aim as Landon gets up... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and delivers a knifedge chop. Landon immediately covers up and shields his sensitive chest, not wanting any more of those. Of course, that's just a red rag to a bull with Krista, who punches Landon in the face to send him retreating back into a corner. *SLAP!*"AAAAAAHHHHHH!" Krista dishes out another chop, to Landon's dismay. Again he tries to cover up, but Krista tags him in the stomach... *SLAP!*"AAAAAAHHHHHH!" ...opening him up for another chop. That's about all Landon can take and he pleads with Krista to take mercy on him, which she seems to. Which is strange. What's stranger is, Landon believes her. Seconds later, Krista throws another chop... but fakes Landon out! Maddix covers his chest, but instead, Krista locks on a DOUBLE TITTY TWISTER!!!!!"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" KRISTA Hello hello. Come in, Tokyo. Are you there? COLE Oh, my! Landon weeps in pain as he's whipped across the ring. Krista follows after him with a boobylicious body splash in the corner, causing Landon to stagger out, into a running facecrusher! Cover by Krista... 1... 2... NO! Rolling outside, Landon asks for a timeout and gets Queen Esther to rub his nipples. KRISTA Esther, when you have a spare moment, I call next. Before Krista can worry about having her nipples seen to she has to deal with Moneymaker, who sneaks in and attacks from behind. Moneymaker hammers away on Krista and shoots her into the ropes. Krista comes back low, sliding through Moneymaker's legs. A waistlock is broken by Theodore, switching around the back to attempt a back suplex. Krista floats up and over to her feet, but is greeted with a back elbow as Moneymaker reacts quickly to the counter. Off the ropes, The Billion Dollar Heir throws a clothesline. Only for Krista to throw up one of her billion dollar legs and kick him right in the arm! Maddix jumps on the apron, sensing an opportunity, only for Krista to sidestep Moneymaker and run the feuding Kings together! Landon falls to the arena floor, while Moneymaker is rolled up in the ring... 1... 2... NO! Moneymaker jumps up and tries to cut Krista off, but his clothesline attempt is countered into a crucifix this time! 1... 2... NO! COLE Almost three, Krista is one step ahead of not just one, but BOTH opponents! COACH I'm telling you, Landon and Teddy need to get on the same page. Even if it's just for one night, guys! A kick shuts Moneymaker down and Krista takes a moment to adjust her top, before smashing him in the face with a knee! KRISTA Almost dropped my pumpkins. That's a Halloween pun. Because it's the Halloween show. That's as much passion as I care to put into this theme night. Take it or leave it. Krista whips Moneymaker to the ropes, but puts her head down and pays with an elbow to the back of the head! Rocked back, Krista stumbles out of control and falls through the ropes, thanks to a timely tug on the middle rope by Landon! COACH See! See what you can achieve as allies? Why must you hate each other? As Krista gets up, Landon grabs hold of her by the witch's costume and HURLS the World Champion into the ringpost!! *CLUNK* "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Oh, Krista goes head first into the steel! COACH Ding dong the witch is dead! COLE How long have you been waiting to use that one? COACH The whole time Krista's been kicking two asses at once. It's been tough holding it in. With Krista disposed of, Maddix slides back inside the ring and squares off with Moneymaker. The face-off soon descends into more shoving, before Moneymaker goes to the gut with a knee. COLE And with Krista out of the way, that leaves King Theodore and self-professed King Landon to finally try and settle their differences, which has been brewing for a number of months! Moneymaker pounds away on Maddix and beats him down to one knee before cackling triumphantly. He does so a little too early though, as Landon surprises him with a jawbreaker! With Moneymaker shaken Landon goes on the attack, firing away at the tyrant with forearms. Off the ropes, Landon then ducks a clothesline from Moneymaker and connects with a flying forearm! KING LANDON WHO'S THE KING NOW!?!? "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The (would-be) King charges at Moneymaker in the corner, but runs into a boot! MONEYMAKER I'M THE KING! THE KING OF THE WORLD! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" With the Las Vegas crowd showing their lack of support for both Kings, Moneymaker elevates himself to the middle rope. He takes a moment to jaw with the crowd though, which he pays for, as Maddix catches him coming off the ropes with a kick to the chest! COLE Call me critical, but this is a World Heavyweight Championship match. And these two seem more concerned with who gets to refer to themselves as a King! COACH It's a matter of pride, Cole. COLE I get that. But these two should probably focus on the matter at hand instead of turning this into a chance to campaign. Landon softens Moneymaker up with some kicks, then climbs to the middle rope himself and comes off with a front missile dropkick! Cover by Landon... 1... 2... NO! After checking Krista is still down, Maddix tries to whip Moneymaker into the turnbuckles. A reversal sends him for the jolting ride instead though. Maddix is then dropped with a back elbow as he staggers away from the corner. Moneymaker takes a second to compose himself, before dropping a FISTFUL OF DOLLARS! COLE Vintage Moneymaker! Moneymaker measures Landon for a second fistdrop! And a third, before making a cover... 1... 2... NO! Outside the ring, Krista crawls around trying to get her bearings, while Moneymaker some stomps to Landon. COLE Well, finally the wannabe monarchs seem to have realised what's going on. And this is a chance, with Krista out of the way. One of these two could regain the World Title, without the champion being involved in the fall, if they can take their opportunity here. Landon picks himself up and tries to fight Moneymaker off, whinging some chops his way. Able to fend them off, Moneymaker stuns Landon with a boot and dishes out a european uppercut. Shooting him to the ropes Moneymaker then hits a Powerslam, looking to put Landon away... 1... 2... KICKOUT! Moneymaker looks a little annoyed for a moment. He's brought out of his sulk by the sight of Krista, pulling herself back onto the apron. Which Moneymaker quickly puts pay to, running across and booting Krista in the skull to send her back outside! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Smart move, keep Krista out of there. Dusting his hands with satisfaction, Moneymaker goes back to the match... ...and is welcomed back with a Dropsault from Landon! QUEEN ESTHER Hooray! Landon gets up first and waves Moneymaker up. As the Billion Dollar Heir gets up, Maddix darts past him, running off the ropes to build up momentum and deliver the King's Guillotine!! Cover... 1... 2... KICKOUT! As Landon gets up, he too notices Krista trying to re-enter the match and takes her out as well! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Hey, if Krista's not gonna co-operate with Landon or Teddy, just take her out of the game. Perfect! Krista sits up and glares at the ring. With a scowl, she twitches her nose Bewitched style... and nothing happens. KRISTA No head explosions. Huh. Now it's confirmed, there were absolutely no benefits to seeing that stupid movie. In the ring, the un-exploded Landon and Moneymaker begin to trade shots. Landon gets control by booting Moneymaker in the gut and then hits the ropes... *THWACK* ...BUT GETS HIT IN THE BACK WITH A BROOMSTICK!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH HEY! COLE No disqualifications! Dragging Maddix out of the ring, Krista proceeds to BEAT MADDIX ACROSS THE BACK WITH THE BROOMSTICK PROP, causing him to howl in pain! COACH NOT COOL! Krista finally ends her onslaught, leaving Landon curled up in pain and covered in red welts across his back. Worried for her King, Queen Esther comes to his aide. And Krista simply can't resist stepping over Esther and RIDING HER LIKE A HORSE!!!! QUEEN ESTHER "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" KRISTA Well, at least that movie Alix bought me had some useful ideas. Sliding into the ring, Krista is quick to dodge Moneymaker and come off the ropes with a spinning headscissors! Moneymaker stumbles around, into a bodyslam, Krista placing the Billion Dollar Heir where she wants him in the middle of the ring. KRISTA I know you missed me during those interminable few minutes. Allow me to make it up to you. Krista reaches down and PULLS HER SKIRT OFF! COLE TRICK OR TREAT! COACH Really? Krista gets dat fine ass out and that's your reaction? Really!? Still looking shaken from her unwanted pony ride, Esther looks up and sees Krista's skirt landing on her face! ESTHER *faints* "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Krista delivers the BOOTY SHAKING MOONSAULT! But, not done there, she rolls back over Moneymaker's body and follows up with a QUEBRADA!! 1... 2... ONLY TWO! Looking to avenge his fallen Queen, Landon goes to climb back into the ring, but is taken out by a running baseball slide by Krista! As Landon hits the barricade The World Champion sits on the apron, peering over curiously but not really caringly to check if Esther is conscious. Calm as you like, Krista then skins the cat back inside. Moneymaker attempts to pounce from behind, but Krista reaches back and hits a STUNNER! Stunned indeed, Moneymaker falls back onto his ass and is drilled with a running knee to the face! COLE All that time with the spotlight on somebody else seems to have made Krista a little mad. And she's making up for lost time now! Krista casually makes the pin... 1... 2... NO! Waiting on Moneymaker, Krista dishes out a punch to the face! And another one! Already looking dazed, Moneymaker is sent loopy as Krista bends over and gives him a prime ass shot... and then MULE KICKS HIM IN THE FACE!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Dayyum! COLE You can look, but you can't touch. And if you look, you will get kicked right in the damn face! Rocked backwards, Moneymaker is stabbed in the gut with a foot and taken to LIFE IN THE FAST LANE!! Cover by Krista... 1... 2... LANDON BREAKS IT UP!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Landon puts the boots to Krista, then takes the broomstick he'd procured and attempts to choke Krista with it! COLE And now Landon, trying to give Krista a taste of her own medicine with that broomstick. After weakening Krista a little, Landon starts hacking away at Krista with the broomstick with repeated shots. Until one connects and suddenly, the broomstick won't come back. KING LANDON Crap. Landon tries to wrestle the stick away from Krista, but the World Champion flings her leg around, catching Landon in the shoulder. More concerned with the pain of that, Landon doesn't realise he's let go of the broomstick, until it's too late and he's being beaten across the back with it again!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" JIVIN' JR SHE'S WHIPPIN' HIM LIKE A GOVERNMUNT MULE, BAH GAWD! COACH Wha... where did he come from!? COLE It's Halloween, who cares? COACH Alright, whatever. The beating continues until Landon is forced to bail out of the ring to get away. Krista throws the broomstick out after him... ...BUT SUDDENLY FINDS HERSELF TRAPPED, IN THE BANK VAULT!!!! COLE Moneymaker from behind! And he's got it locked in, the Bank Vault! COACH Night night, witchy! Moneymaker sinks the cobra clutch in and Krista looks in trouble. Unable to fight it, she falls forward and Moneymaker gets a big grin on his face, nodding his head thinking the World Title is heading his way! Krista drops to one knee, then down to two, seemingly going out! Moneymaker drops down with her and keeps the pressure on, as the referee takes Krista's arm and drops it once. COACH This is the best Halloween ever! Still no signs of escape from Krista, as the referee DROPS THE HAND TWICE. "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" Moneymaker barks at the referee to hurry up, as he finally drops the hand... ...AND IT SPRINGS BACK UP!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" MONEYMAKER DAMN IT! Angrily Moneymaker starts to shake Krista around in a vain attempt to put her out... ...but before he can do do, Maddix slides back in... *SMACK!* ...AND HITS A LOW FLYING SUPERKICK ON MONEYMAKER TO BREAK THE HOLD!!!! COLE OH! Right to the side of the head, what a shot! Both Moneymaker and Krista collapse and Landon dives on top of Moneymaker, to the crowd's sudden horror! COACH YES! 1... 2... KRISTA BREAKS THE PIN!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" Landon gets up and begins to line up Krista... ...when suddenly, THE RINGSIDE AREA BEGINS TO FILL WITH SMOKE COLE What the... COACH Yo, who hit the dry ice button? COLE *coughs* I know it's Halloween but, this is ridiculous! As the smoke slowly begins to disperse, only three people are left on their feet. Krista, the referee and oh yeah, KAREEM. COLE KAREEM!? Krista looks around confused, not aware that Kareem is behind her until she gets spun around and dropped with a HEAVY duty clothesline!! The Middle Eastern Wet Dream looks down at Krista, before dropping the BIG LOAD with a mammoth splash, crushing the World Champion!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" COLE OH NO! COACH OH YEAH! COLE Kareem with the big splash... but what is he doing here!? "YOU SUCK!" "YOU SUCK!" "YOU SUCK!" "YOU SUCK!" The bigman looks side to side, as the other two men in the match start to get up, looks of concern on their faces. Kareem looks over at Moneymaker... WHO SMILES. And on cue, Kareem hoists up Maddix and hits him with the big SAMOAN DROP!!!! "OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" MONEYMAKER BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! COACH Guess that's your answer! Moneymaker pats Kareem on the back and he bobs his head, pleased with his work and pleased with the money being promised him. Kareem exits the ring and leaves Moneymaker to profit. COACH Ha ha! Who needs Krista's help when you've got Mister Moneymaker's wealth!? Big smile on his face, Moneymaker drops down and covers the prone Krista to the crowd's disgust... 1... 2... KRISTA KICKS OUT!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" MONEYMAKER WHAT!? COLE It wasn't enough! And I dread to think how much taking Kareem to dinner must have cost Moneymaker! Moneymaker takes his frustrations out on the referee, blaming a slow count for his failure to become World Champion. "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" "KRIS - TA!" Having tore a strip off the referee, Moneymaker turns his attention back to Krista. Grabbing her by the hair, he drags Krista to her knees. MONEYMAKER WHY MUST YOU MAKE THIS SO HARD!? GIVE IN TO ME! SURRENDER TO ME! Krista responds by GRABBING MONEYMAKER BY THE BALLS!! MONEYMAKER ...too rough! Locked in the Blue Ball Special, Moneymaker starts to wilt, as Krista climbs to her feet favouring her ribs. Krista looks Moneymaker in the eyes and lets him go. But Moneymaker's hopes for mercy are mislaid, as Krista delivers a knee low! Moneymaker doubles over in pain, while Krista picks up the broomstick. COACH Oh no. Broomstick in hand, Krista smirks, as she twirls the impliment around in her hands. COACH Teddy! Teddy, turn around! Krista stands on the back of Moneymaker's ankle, preparing him for a quick, sharp SODOMISATION ATTEMPT WITH THE BROOMSTICK!!!!! MONEYMAKER AAAARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!! COACH ARRHHH!! Standing bolt upright, Moneymaker grabs his BUTT in shock. Krista then adds insult to injury by 'jumping on' the broomstick to swoop into a KIDOLOGY!!!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COACH THAT WAS UNNECCESSARY! Krista makes the cover... 1... 2... 3!!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" *DINGDINGDING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the match... and STILL OAOAST WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION... KRISTA IIISSSAAAAADDOOOORRRAAAAA DDUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAAANN!!!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Krista sits up and holds her ribs, looking annoyed at what she had to go through on route to victory. COLE Despite Maddix and Moneymaker's best laid plans and efforts, Krista has made jesters of the Kings and is still the World Champion! Handed her title belt Krista decides to take pity on Moneymaker and leaves the broomstick on his chest as a souvenir. COLE Krista providing lots of tricks and plenty of treats tonight at the Halloween Spectacular! We'll see you again on HeldDOWN, as we begin our road to November Reign!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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