Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 -OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT-BROADCAST IN OAOAST 3D We come to sofa central where Double C sits wearing the OFFICIAL Angleslam football jerseys. COLE Welcome, folks to Hershey, Pennsylvania, welcome to OAOAST HeldDOWN~!TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT SIX MAN TAGREJECT, BOHEMOTH, LEON RODEZ VS NAT BLACK, NED BLANCHARD AND BARON WINDELSTONIGHT! COACH You saw right, we got a huge mainevent tonight! COLE Plus we have footage of the Duncan family reunion and it was wild! All that and more on HeldDOWN~! Lady Gaga’s “Disco Heaven” sounds out as multicoloured lights flash over the entrance way. Dancing out onto the stage is The Disco Duck Vinny Valentine. At his side is his nemesis/cousin Tony Tourettes. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a televised time limit of fifteen minutes! Now making his way to the ring being accompanied by TONY TOURETTES, he is from Brooklyn, New York, “THE DISCO DUCK” VINNY VALLLENTTTINNNEEEEEEEEEEE! COLE Folks, don’t forget Angleslam is just two weeks away live from Baltimore, Maryland! Sisters fighting sisters, elimination chambers and more are in store for the event of the summer! Vinny enters the ring with a look of amusement resting on his face. He snatches the microphone from Buffer, which pleases no one but himself. VINNY Aww sookie-sookie now! Vinny Valentine back on HeldDOWN~! TONY With Tony Tourettes, shit faces! VINNY Hey, don’t steal V-Squared’s spotlight! TONY Don’t steal my sweet Asian pussy then! VINNY Oh man, oh man, oh man! Are you still going on about that? You weren’t gonna get it in anyway, she would’ve bolted when she saw your weiner was smaller than Mister Peanut! TONY I take that as a compliment, piss monkey, Mister Peanut is a large legume! Vinny has had enough of his cousin and chucks him through the ropes! The lights dim and spotlights swing across the arena as “All I Need” by Natasha Bedignfield comes over the sound system. The camera spots Oscar Friberg, stationed on a stairwell in the arena. He nods and smirks to the cheering fans, before heading down to the ring. BUFFER And the opponent, from Amsterdam, Netherlands, he is THE FREEBIRD….OSSSSCAARRRRR FRRRIIIIBBEEERRRRGGGGGGGG! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Upon entering the ring, Oscar removes his tank top to give the ladies even more reason to cheer. COLE Oscar Friberg and I talked a bit earlier today and he told me he’s happy to have the Cucaracha Kingdom well behind him. DING DING DING Vinny circles a stoic Oscar, with a confident smile on his face. He then steps into a lockup with The Freebird. COLE Folks, as Oscar Friberg and Vinny Valentine lockup we just remind you of our red hot mainevent tonight with Reject, teaming with Leon Rodez and world champion Bohemoth to face off against Baron Windels, Nathaniel Black and Ned Blanchard. COACH That’s an Anglemania level mainevent right there, Mikey Cole. Vinny shoves Oscar into the corner, where a clean break is called for by referee Charles Robinson. V-Squared gives it but does so only so that he may shove Oscar in the chest. COLE I don’t know if Oscar is the type of guy you want to shove like that. Oscar proves Cole correct as he darts at Vinny. The Brooklyn native scrambles backwards, ducking beneath the opposite corner ropes to protect himself. COACH Look at that thug chasing down a legitimate athlete. It makes me sick. Oscar ignores Robinson’s calls to separate from Vinny and pounds him in the back. Eventually the veteran official has no choice but to physically step between Oscar and Vinny. Oscar isn’t pleased with this, and directs a hard glare at Robinson. COACH Now that criminal is going to hit the referee! COLE I think he’s just insulted that Vinny shoved him in the chest. The Freebird has a lot of pride. COACH What’s he got to be proud about? That he was dealing weapons? That he was in a gang? Vinny complains to the referee about Oscar’s aggression, demanding he be awarded a some sort of compensation. TONY Get to work, fart tickler! Vinny barks at his cousin to keep silent before stepping into another lockup with Oscar. The two men tangle for a good amount of time. After several seconds pass, Oscar swings behind Vinny to take him down to the canvas with an amateur style takedown. He can’t keep hold of Vinny for long as the Disco Duck shoots out in order to grab a hammerlock. COLE Personally, I think Oscar has all the tools needed to succeed in the OAOAST. He’s a good looking kid with a lot of talent and he’s connected with the OAOAST Galaxy. COACH That don’t say anything good about the OAOAST Galaxy if they’re connecting with a criminal. Oscar fights to his feet, where he manages to snatch Vinny inside a headlock. Vinny quickly pushes Oscar into the ropes, but is knocked over by a running shoulder tackle. TONY Don’t take that shit from this Europussy! Vinny gets to his feet, and then shoves Oscar in the chest for a second time. The Freebird locks down at his chest with eyes alit by fury. His fist then shoots forward and smacks Vinny across the jaw. Down goes Vinny, and he immediately begs for mercy from his aggressor. Oscar isn’t one for being merciful, and he stomps Vinny into the corner. COLE Let’s talk about tonight’s mainevent, Coach. Can anyone trust anyone? COACH I don’t think so. Reject’s a sneaky dude, he’s as liable to give his own partner’s a Eulogy as he is the other team. Leon Rodez may just walk out. And Bohemoth isn’t gonna go out of his way to help any threats to his title. On the other side you have three hot tempered dudes. Vinny brings himself upright in the corner. Too his dismay he’s blasted in the chest by knife edge chops from Oscar. Giving Vinny a taste of his own medicine, Oscar shoves him in the chest. COACH This kid gives us all a bad name. He makes people think dudes in the wrestling industry are nothing but bullies and criminals. Oscar attempts to whip Vinny across the ring, but Vinny reverses the hold to send Oscar into the corner. The Dutchman stumbles towards the center of the ring, right into the boot of V-Squared. Vinny bounces off the ropes, coming back to nail Oscar in the face with a sliding uppercut! VINNY COLE The OAOAST’s very own representative for Dancing With The Stars? I don’t think so. Vinny slides out the ring, while Oscar rolls closer to the corner. The Disco Duck snatches hold of Oscar’s leg, and then swiftly slams it into the steel posts. Oscar howls in agony, as Vinny offers a high five to his cousin. His return is a middle finger. COACH It doesn’t matter how big or how small you are, if you can take out your opponent’s knee you’ve got a good chance of earning a victory. After rolling back into the ring, Vinny grabs Oscar’s leg and viciously slams it down onto the canvas. He continues to target Oscar’s leg, by driving his elbow onto his knee. Oscar tries to squirm away but Vinny has him trapped with a leg lock. COLE The Freebird has been caged! COACH He should be used to being cage with him spending half his life in a jail cell. Oscar reaches out for the ropes, but he’s much too far away to touch them. His face is a beet red from the pain that travels through his body. Desperate to break free, he begins elbowing Vinny in the side of the head. The Disco Duck can only stand so much of this, and is quickly forced to release the hold. However, he stays on the attack by driving his snake print boot into Oscar’s knee. COACH Vinny is a fun loving guy, but he’s also a dangerous guy. COLE That’s right, Vinny Valentine can hurt you if you give him the chance. But, the match isn’t over yet and I think the rookie is up for the challenge. Vinny twists and turns Oscar’s legs in an effort to gain a submisson. Robinson inquires to Oscar’s status and gets a definitive refusal to quit. COACH You also gotta give Vinny credit for doing this within the rules. He ain’t a lawbreaker like Friberg. Oscar summons a burst of strength in his free leg to shove Vinny away. The Disco Duck crashes sternum first into the ring posts. Oscar is right there to school boy him… ONE! TWO! Vinny rolls out the pinfall. He jumps to his feet, and pastes Oscar against the ring posts with a clothesline. From there he targets Oscar’s legs, stomping him down to the ground. When that’s over, he blatantly chokes his foe with his oddly designed boot. Robinson makes an instant five count… ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! Vinny breaks away from Oscar, holding his hands up as if to say he’s done nothing wrong. COLE Vinny Valentine stretching that choke right out to the five count. COACH That’s what any good veteran does. Vinny steps past the referee to grab Oscar by his blond hair. But as he tries to pull Oscar upright, The Friberg tags him in the stomach with a punch. Vinny responds with a clubbing forearm. Yet, this can not stop Oscar from getting to his feet and then stomping Vinny in the stomach. This leads to Oscar snapping on a front facelock. He tries for a vertical suplex, but his knee gives way to allow Vinny to break free. The Disco Duck capitalizes on his freedom by bouncing off the ropes, and chop blocking his foe. Oscar cries out from the anguish before he’s pinned to the canvas…. ONE! TWO! Another two count as Oscar performs a kickout. COLE I think Oscar’s knee might be in danger of going out. COACH Good. That’ll put him on the shelf for a good six or eight months. Vinny starts to lift Oscar into the air for a shin breaker. However, Oscar pounds his foe in the head with hard punches and manages to lower himself down to the ground. Vinny shoves Oscar away to prevent any further punches. Wishing to stay on The Freebird, he charges at him. But Oscar greets his arrival with a springboard leg lariat! COLE A springboard leg lariat! And that may have taken too much out of the nineteen year old Oscar Friberg. That much is evident as Oscar limps around the ring. Vinny charges him once more, expecting to knock him off his feet. But Oscar explodes forward with a elbow that connects with Vinny’s jaw. The Disco Duck falls back into the ropes, whom promptly spew him back at Oscar. The Freebird grabs onto Vinny and upends him with a flapjack! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Vinny staggers to his feet, seeking to get away from Oscar. However, he can do no such thing as Oscar drives him to the canvas with a half nelson slam! COLE What power shown by The Freebird! Tony elevates himself onto the ring apron to distract referee Robinson. While Tony “amazes” him with tales of his masturbatory habits, Vinny yanks a pair of brass knucks out his tights. COLE Vinny has the knucks! Look at out Oscar! Oscar ducks the incoming haymaker from V-Squared! Vinny swings around, and is kicked in the stomach. Oscar then leaps onto his back and falls to the side for the CK3! COLE Birdcall! As the fans cheer, Oscar hooks both of Vinny’s legs for the fall…. ONE! TWO! THREE!!! DING DING DING BUFFER Your winner as a result of a pinfall…..OSCAR FRIIIIBERRRRGGGGG! Oscar’s hand is raised by the referee, while Tony shrugs his shoulders, disinterested in his cousin’s latest defeat. COLE Another victory for The Freebird, who continues to roll! Oscar limps away from the official to try and celebrate his victory. But, there will be no celebration tonight as FAQU drops him with a side kick! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE What is this? Faqu shoots Oscar into the corner, and then slams his massive chest into him with a big splash! Oscar sinks down to ground, his eyes glazed over from the tremendous pain he’s in. COACH This is revenge that’s what this is! Oscar’s head is nearly smashed into pieces from a running butt smash from the Samoan Wrecking Ball! FAQU BLLLAAARRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Faqu stares menacingly and wild eyed at Oscar as he lies battered and broken in the corner. COLE I thought Oscar had put The Cucaracha Kingdom behind him? COACH I think they say differently! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 We hurriedly cut to the back of the arena, in time to catch THEODORE MONEYMAKER arriving to the building. With Lorelei dressed lavishly beside him, Moneymaker is brought to a halt as Josh Matthews runs up to him. MATTHEWS Mister Moneymaker! Is there any truth to the rumour going around that you're planning to call for the coronation ceremony, right here tonight? MONEYMAKER Hmm. Tell me, where are we again? MATTHEWS Uhm, Hershey, Pennsylvania. "YYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!" As the poor fans out in the arena cheer, Moneymaker turns his nose up. MONEYMAKER A coronation ceremony? Surrounded by fat, spotty, chocolate smeared peons? I don't think so. No coronation tonight! This town doesn't deserve to see it. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" As Teddy goes to walk off, Josh holds him up again, earnin a frustrated sigh from Moneymaker. MATTHEWS Uh, one more thing. Have you heard about King Landon, claiming he has a big announcement to make here tonight? MONEYMAKER A big announcement? Let me guess. His majesty finally got approved for a Discover card? BWAHAHA! You know what, not only have I not heard about Landon's little announcement, I also don't care about Landon's announcement. It is of zero significance or consequence to me. MATTHEWS Well, apparantly he disagrees and says you'll be the most interested in what he has to say. In fact, he said that he hoped the entire Enterprise would be with you, watching. MONEYMAKER Is that so? Well, my time is very valuable. But, hey, we could all do with a laugh. BWAHAHAHA! Moneymaker and Lorelei rudely brush Josh off, striding out of sight.LATER TONIGHTDUNCAN FAMILY REUNION FOOTAGETONIGHT!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 Before a ruckus crowd is OAOAST correspondent Tony Brannigan in the ring. BRANNIGAN The temperature isn’t the only thing hot right now, so too is the action in the OAOAST. And we’ll definitely feel the heat Sunday night, August 28 when the OAOAST presents the hottest event of the summer, Angleslam, live exclusively on pay-per-view from Baltimore, Maryland. One man experienced a different kind of heat last week on this very program thanks to my guests… BIG PAPA THRUST and the lovely OOHLALA! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Accompanied by the buxom Oohlala, BPT flexes the largest arms in the galaxy as “Big Pimpin” by Jay-Z blares in the background. BRANNIGAN Big Papa Thrust, Oohlala, thanks very much for your time. We have a handful of topics to get to, and let’s begin with the nature of your relationship. Business or pleasure? BIG PAPA THRUST You know, Tony Brannigan… BRANNIGAN Tell me Big Papa. BIG PAPA THRUST … a gentlemen never kisses and tells, but being the living legend that you are I’ll go ahead and spill the beans. It’s no secret the Big Bad Glutei Daddy has been on the prowl for a #1 freakazoid, one that all began months ago with the wooing of Malaysia, the ultimate combination of beauty and beatdowns. That is until I bumped into Oohlala at my friendly neighborhood sperm bank. It was then I realized I overlooked one key area in my hunt for the #1 freakazoid in the world. This chick had to have the class to go along with her fine tits and ass. BRANNIGAN Your new valet is fine all right. BIG PAPA THRUST A valet is one of those little girls like that Ester chick or Lorelei DeCenzo. This woman right here is my #1 freakazoid. Now I may not be no rocket scientist, but I’ve sent Oohlala into orbit a hundred times and back while Mr. Dick’s been in hiding the past 7 days. See, that piece of trash called me a waste of sperm, so I decided to do something useful with my guys. Roll the footage. COACH Oh no. Tell me we’re not gonna see that again? COLE The highlight of my OAOAST career.LAST WEEKBIG PAPA THRUST rushes down the aisle with a SUPER SOAKER and OOHLALA the sperm bank receptionist who’s also equipped with a super soaker. MISTER DICK BRANNIGAN Incoming! * WHOOSH * Brannigan heads for higher ground as BPT shoots a gooey white substance at MD and Malaysia, both of whom struggle to maintain their footing. After he’s through with the first Super Soaker BPT begins shooting the second one. MD and Malaysia manage to escape the ring and flee through the crowd totally drenched while BPT stands tall with Oohlala. "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BRANNIGAN That incident has Mr. Dick hot under the jock strap. He’s since challenged you and Oohlala to a tag match at Angleslam. OOHLALA (South African accent) Did you hear that, Big Papa -- little Dickey is hot under the jock strap. Good thing you didn’t win the Ride Her Cup or you could’ve caught an STD from that walking sperm dumpster Malaysia. “OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” COLE Ouch. COACH That’s a low blow, Cole. Not to mention a lie. BRANNIGAN Is that a South African accent I detect? OOHLALA Very good Tony. Most people assume it’s British the first time they hear me speak. BRANNIGAN I dig chicks with foreign accents so I tend to recognize where each comes from. Anyway, back to my question regarding the challenge issued for Angle-- Wait just a minute. Heads turn as DEUCE DEUCE BIGELOW enters the ring. BRANNIGAN Deuce Deuce Bigelow! DEUCE I don’t mean to interrupt… BIG PAPA THRUST Well you just did. DEUCE …but I heard about the challenge and I’m sure you’d agree with me when I say the ring is no place for a woman, at least one not trained to wrestle. As you well know, I’ve had my problems with Mr. Dick and Kareem, so how ‘bout we leave the women in the corner and take on those two at Angleslam? "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COLE There’s a match I’d like to see. Big Papa Thrust and the Beast from Sin City against Mr. Dick and the Middle Eastern Wet Dream. BIG PAPA THRUST No. Deuce pumps his fists in excitement before realizing BPT said no. DEUCE No?! BRANNIGAN I gotta admit, Big Papa Thrust, your answer took us all by surprise. BIG PAPA THRUST I don’t hang or bang with fatty-fat-fatties. I only teamed with you the first time because I was after a piece of ass that turned out to be radioactive, not to become your BFF. You can deal with whatever remaining problems you have with Mr. Dick and his fat bastard BUTT buddy on your own time. Me and Oohlala-- “Motherfucker of the Year” suddenly cues and MR. DICK appears onstage with KAREEM and MALAYSIA. MISTER DICK With friends like that who needs enemies, huh? Kareem and Malaysia nod. MISTER DICK But why don’t you ladies put your panties back on straight and listen to an interesting proposal I have for you concerning Angleslam. Actually, you can thank your #1 slut-- er, I mean freakazoid for the idea. Instead of just a simple ol’ tag match I say we kick it up a notch and have ourselves a 6 person SPERM DUMPSTER MATCH! COLE A what?! MISTER DICK No, all that wax in your ears didn’t make you hear that wrong. I said a sperm dumpster match. What that means is the first team to toss all their opponents in a dumpster placed ringside will be declared the winners. Unless of course you don’t have the balls to accept our challenge. BPT and Deuce shoot each other a look. Oohlala then has a word with BPT. BIG PAPA THRUST Since rules are made to be broken, I’ll team with you one last time, Bigelow. After this it’s every man for himself. DEUCE I wouldn’t have it any other way. “Just a Gigolo/I Ain't Got Nobody” hits and a mass staredown ensues. COLE What a match signed for AngleSlam. COACH Yeah, the first ever Sperm Dumpster match. A 6 person sperm dumpster match. I wonder though, will the dumpster have actual... you know. COLE You'll have to order Angleslam live on pay-per-view to find out. But, right now is HeldDOWN time and here on HeldDOWN we have footage of the Duncan family reunion as shot by Molly Nerdly! COACH Krista allowed that? COLE Alix forged her signature. COACH That explains it. COLE Let's roll the footage, it promises to be something else! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 DUNCAN FAMILY REUNION PART ONE The Duncan family reunion is in full swing in the swank and gorgeous Hotel Vitale in San Francisco. Well dressed reunion goers are deep in conversation with one another.JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN nervously stands in a corner, trying to figure out to approach these highly successful people. Before she comes up with the answer, a woman in her mid thirties comes up to her. JADE Uh…hi? MERRILL Hello there! You must be one of Krista’s daughters; I’m your third cousin Merrill. JADE A pleasure to meet you. MERRILL So polite. Let me guess, you’re the one who posed for those popular pictures! JADE Uh….that was Maya. MERRILL Oh. Well, then you’re probably the one coming out with her clothing line. JADE Maya again. MERRILL Hmmmm….then you must be the one recording a single with Puff Daddy. Jade clenches her fists and bites back a snarl. JADE Maya. MERRILL Well…I’m sure whatever you do its something great? JADE (proudly) I’m the OAOAST Women’s Champion. Merril stares at Jade with a curious and confused glance. JADE I’m sure my mom or someone mentioned it to you. It’s a pretty big deal after all. MERRILL OAOAST? Is that some sort of rehab clinic? That’s the one in Long Beach, isn’t it? Are you a recovering alcoholic? My prayers are with your struggles. I suppose having a sister as successful as Maya would turn anyone into a jealous, drunken, wreck. But, don’t worry I’m sure you’ll find something you’re good at. Another snarl is forced away by Jade. JADE I’m good at wrestling. MERRILL Wrestling? Topless oil wrestling? Well, if that’s how you earn your money, then that’s just dandy. A job is a job, I say. But, I’m currently in talks to produce a Mister Ed movie with Hugh Jackman and Reese Witherspoon. Maybe you could- JADE (hopeful) Be in it? MERRILL I was thinking clean up the horse dung. ******MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD is the center of attention, animatedly telling a story to six other family members. MAYA So Diddy is asking me if I want Jade to be in my music video. And I say, are you kidding me, her big rat’s nest of a hairstyle wouldn’t even fit in the camera shot. LISTENERS MAYA But, hey working with Diddy on my music is great. It sure beats hanging around Jade and some of my friends. Hey, that’s the first time I used the word Jade and friends without “has no” in between! LISTENERS MAYA I think my next song is gonna be a duet with Joe Jonas. Jade met him first actually. She was so desperate for him to get her an acting role she jammed her resume right into his face. I think that was the first time anyone’s seen a resume written on crayon on the back of a Denny’s menu. But, with that striped top she’s wearing right now she’d be perfect to play the role of Hamburglar. LISTENERS Watching and listening all of this is an irate Jade. JADE She’s making fun of me! MOLLY (O.S.) I….don’t know about that. JADE Really? Because, I don’t think being compared to Ronald McDonald’s archnemesis is a compliment! MOLLY (O.S.) She said some other things. JADE Like how my resume was written on the back of a Denny’s menu? It was an iHop menu! MOLLY (O.S.) That might actually be worse. JADE I was in a hurry, I had to get it to him right away! MOLLY (O.S.) Jade, just try talking to some of your other family members and have a good time with them. JADE Yeah, ok. Good idea. ******* An exasperated KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN is in mid conversation with…PIERCE DUNCAN with a BOOMBOX on his shoulder. KRISTA I’m telling you, you idiot, Grandpa Steven is a holocaust survivor. PIERCE That’s more of your craziness. There weren’t any Italians in the holocaust, bro. KRISTA The wonders of your stupidity is only exceeded by your amazing iability to form a coherent sentence without the word bro. He’s not Italian. We’re not Italian. PIERCE What are babbling about? We’re a traditional Italian family. KRISTA We’re Jewish, you daft moron! I don’t know what would make it any clearer, the fact that everyman here but you is wearing a yamaka or the irrational fear of black people we all possess. And what’s with the boombox? This isn’t Kid N Play’s House Party. PIERCE I’m done talking to you, big sis! You just don’t know how a woman should behave in a traditional Italian family. KRISTA Someday an anvil will drop on your head, and the entire world will come together in joyus song. Pierce strides away from Krista with an overly cocky strut. He walks up to an elderly man in a wheel chair and swipes his food out his hand. PIERCE Thanks for the pate, old dude. Pierce strolls away. OLD MAN That was my denture cream. The Result sets the boombox down in the center of the room, an odd sight that draws little attention. PIERCE Hey, this a party is a major drag! Let’s get this bitch started right!Party rock is in the house tonight Everybody just have a good time And we gonna make you lose your mind Everybody just have a good time Party rock is in the house tonight Everybody just have a good time And we gonna make you lose your mind We just wanna see ya shake that The sound of LMFAO and the image of Pierce fistpumping the night away now gains the reunion’s horrified attention. People watch with disgust and disdain as the black sheep of the family busts an unwelcome move. PIERCE (fistpumping) Get crazy! Get loose! Get wild! Buck wild! Pierce’s dad, Congressman Duncan walks up to his son with a solemn expression resting on his face. CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN Son. PIERCE Get stupid! Get loose! CONGRESSSMAN DUNCAN Son! PIERCE Dad! Fistpump if you’re feeling me! CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN You’re my son and I love you, but I’m afraid I have to do this for the greater good. REUNION GOERS ******* Jade excitedly approaches another family member, hoping to make the right kind of impression of him. JADE Hi! MAN Hello, I’m Merrill’s brother, Chet. JADE Its so nice to meet you. I’m- CHET Jade. Yes, I know all about you. JADE Really? CHET I know that you’re the OAOAST Women’s Champion. Jade smiles, thrilled to be recognized for her accomplishment. JADE I am, yes! CHET Very impressive, considering your disability. JADE Excuse me? CHET There’s no need to be ashamed, your sister Maya told me all about your “mental retardation”. I think its fantastic that you’ve overcome it to live a successful and productive life. JADE I’m not retarded! CHET Of course not. I meant to use the word “mentally disabled”. Maya told me how often times she’ll find you wandering the street in just your diapers. JADE My diapers?! CHET And how she has to stop you from using paint thinner as steak sauce. You’re truly lucky to have a sister who cares so deeply for your well-being. And to do it while launching her clothing line and music career is most incredible! JADE Oh yeah, I’m real lucky Maya is my sister. CHET I just took on Ben Stiller as a client, I’m an entertainment lawyer, and a lot of people don’t know this but he works with a lot of special needs kids, I’m sure he’d be happy to meet you. Jade storms off as her cousin Chet wonders if her rudeness is due to her “retardation”TO BE CONTINUED Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 “God Of Thunder” hits as the entry way lights up a deep yellow. Stepping through yellow smoke are the duo of ThunderKid and Abdullah Abir Nerdly. Unaffected by the crowd’s negative reaction, TK glides to the ring with Abdullah singing his praises behind him. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of fifteen minutes! Now making his way to the ring, being accompanied by ABDULLAH ABIRD NERDLY…..he is……THE GOD OF THUNDER……THUNNDDERRRRKKKKIIIIDDDDDDDDD! COLE ThunderKid in action tonight on HeldDOWN and we’ll see fellow Church member Reject in that big six man tag in tonight’s mainevent. COACH Can’t wait for that one, Mikey. After entering the yellow lit ring, TK raises his arms as he bounces back and forth on his heels. 3 Doors Down’s “Its Not My Time” comes over the sound system to a great reception from the Hershey crowd. Stepping through the parted entrance doors is ultimate good guy Tim Cash. With a smile on his face, he shakes hands on his way down the entrance ramp. BUFFER And the opponent, from Peoria, Illinois, he is TIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMM CCCCCCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! COACH Yo, this cat got got last week. COLE I don’t think we need to address that incident. I’m just glad to see Timmy is doing well. DING DING DING Cash shakes hands with referee Clem Buzzlefoxer and then turns to TK. The Green Bay native shakes his head, refusing the kind gesture. COLE Tim Cash’s good friend Baron Windels along with ThunderKid’s partner, Reject, will be in that massive Elimination chamber at Angleslam on August 28th. TK boots Cash in the gut, doubling the good guy over. This gives TK the chance needed to capture Cash with a side headlock. He wrenches and grinds on the hold as though he were trying to pry Cash’s head off. The Peoria native grows weary of this tactic, and as such he uses all the strength in his body to try and push TK to the ropes. But, TK merely drops to his knees in order to negate those efforts. COLE ThunderKid is just so strong, and so powerful. The crowd gets behind Cash, urging him to fight out the hold. He manages to do so, by briding TK back into a pinning position… ONE! TK quickly escapes the pinfall. After getting to his feet, he smacks his knee against Cash’s stomach. With Cash hobbled, TK backs into the ropes. He returns to upend his foe with a lariat! A cover is then made…. ONE! TWO! Cash brings the shoulder up. COACH I’m surprised Cash can even be out here in the same building with you, Mikey. You got him beat up. COLE I didn’t! Pierce and Riggs…well….they’re going to get what’s coming to them. COACH From you? COLE From somebody. TK picks Cash off the canvas, and targets him with measured punches to the forehead. The good guy falls into the corner, where TK stomps him down to the ground. His situation grows all the worse when TK begins standing on his head! ABDULLAH Yes, my child, crush his head! Do god’s work and you will be richly rewarded! Buzzlefoxer separates TK from Cash’s noggin, drawing complaints from both performer and manager. Letting Abdullah continue to rag on Clem, TK brushes past the referee to get a hold of Cash. But, Cash fights him away with hard punches to the stomach. TK comes back, however, with a powerful boot attempt. But Cash slides out the way and TK crotches himself on the ropes! ABDULLAH This is not what god wants! No, it is not what he wants! Being the good guy that he is, Cash allows TK time to remove himself from the ropes. TK repays the kindness by charging at Cash with a lariat. Cash counters this with an arm drag. Seconds after hitting the mat, TK is back up and darting towards Cash. Another arm drag puts him on the ground, this time with Cash trapping him inside an armlock. COACH I’m just sayin’ why you stand by and let Riggs and Piercey D do your boy like that? COLE I’m not a fighter, I’m just an announcer. COLE But still that’s your mans getting that whup-whup put on him. TK finds his way to his feet, but still is tangled inside an armlock. He remides that solution by using his free arm to hammer Cash with closed fists. This breaks the hold and allows TK to run the ropes. He telegraphs a shoulder tackle on his return and for that reason Cash is able to knock him over with a dropkick! A pinfall is then made…. ONE! TWO! TK gets the shoulder up. Now its Cash who runs the ropes as his opponent gets to his feet. Coming back, he’s hiptossed over and then pinned to the canvas…. ONE! TWO! Cash makes the kickout! TK batters his foe with brutal punches, trying to bust him open. When that fails he pulls Cash up and sends him into the ropes. A powerslam welcomes Cash on his return, and the official counts the fall… ONE! TWO! Cash brings his shoulder up to escape the fall. COACH If Riggs or The Result came out here right now what would you do? COLE I’d worry for my safety. I spoke my mind on those two, and I think the OAOAST Galaxy agrees with what I had to say. TK pulls Cash up and sends him into the corner. A leaping splash follows, causing Cash to stagger out to the center of the ring. TK climbs to the second turnbuckle of the vacated corner. Rooted on by Abdullah, he sails off with a lariat that bowls Cash over. TK then goes back to punching Cash, until he’s warned by Buzzlefoxer. Forced to relent, TK begins yanking Cash up. However, Cash fights him off by shoving him away. Angered, TK comes screaming back with a bicycle kick. The attack is ducked, and Cash goes behind TK to hit a Randy Orton style backbreaker! COLE Cashback! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Cash heads straight to the top rope to further popl the sold out Hershey audience. He claps his hands together as he awaits for TK’s rise. When TK comes upright, Cash leaps forward to strike him in the side of the head with a missile dropkick! SPEAR BY JAMES RIGGS~! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Riggs leans over the ropes and demands a microphone. RIGGS Boo me all you want but there’s only one person to blame for this and that’s Michael Cole! COLE What did I do? RIGGS Cole, I saw you palling around backstage earlier today with Cash, know what I’m saying. You were talking and you were laughing, and you were probably laughing at me and Piercey D. COLE That isn’t true! RIGGS And I know you were doing it, because that’s all you can talk about is me and The Result. We’re the only subject that ever comes out your lips. The only reason you don’t speak on us when we’re not out here is because you’ve got producers yelling in your ear to stay focused, know what I’m saying. But, right now you should be complimenting me. Because I am withholding my anger, and I’d like to be the strangler of your punk ass little neck. COACH You gonna get got! RIGGS Cole, the fact is simple: you display a complete lack of respect, as you sit with your feet up at sofa central and use the commentary position to trash me and Piercey D. I believe you’ve done a hit of acid and started imagining any one gives a damn about you have to say. Your jealousy and envy whirls you into a frenzy every time you see our faces. So you twist and you twirl and you spin yourself into a major rage. The people you’ve trashed before us are cool with just letting your insults slide on by. But me and Piercey D we’ve got reps to uphold, know what I’m saying. And because of that you’ve got to get your ass kicked. COACH Hahahahaaha! You fucked now, Mikey! COLE Hey now! This isn’t fair, I’m just announcer. RIGGS I can hear you from here, making your excuses that you’re just a announcer. I was prepared to hear that excuse, know what I’m saying. We’re gonna make things sporting for you and give you a fair chance to fight back. You can pick two of your boys to face me and Piercey D at Angleslam. If we win we get five minutes in the ring with you. If you win, we’ll quit bothering you and you’re free to spew all the garbage you like to spew. COLE I chose Biffman and Tim Cash! RIGGS Biffman and Tim Cash? You couldn’t make this hard on us? Boy, you are as dumb as you look. Fine, just to give you a taste of what’s coming at Angleslam…. Riggs turns around ready to spear Tim Cash. Instead he’s caught by a lariat from Biffman! Riggs scrambles upright, only to see Timmy and Biffman join hands to lariat him over the ropes! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE Yes! Way to go, guys! Way to go!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 OAOAST HeldDOWN~! Is Brought To You By...Expedia-Where You Book Matters Up on the interview stage stands Tony Brannigan, soaking in a few cheers and compliments before he gets on with business. BRANNIGAN Alright, everybody please welcome right now the unofficial King of the OAOAST, with Queen Esther, give it up for LANDON MADDIX! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The crowd 'give it up' in their own special way, as "Parade Of The Charioteers" trumpets through the arena. Clad in his regal purple and gold robe, the former King Of The Ring and stubborn King in his own mind Landon walks out, with Queen Esther at his side. The King looks fairly morose, as he trails up onto the stage. Meanwhile, we cut to the Enterprise locker room, where members of The Enterprise are gathered around their TV screen, with plenty of gold on show between the 6-Man Champions and, front and centre, the US Champion Theodore Moneymaker. BRANNIGAN Landon, you'll forgive me if I drop the whole King Landon thing. Landon nods his head, sadly. BRANNIGAN I guess it's safe to say that 2011 hasn't been a great year for you so far, Landon. There's been friction in the Kingdom. You've lost your protége. You got beat at AngleMania by Nathaniel Black. And you've come back to find yourself dethroned, just for good measure. But apparantly, you've got a big announcement to make here tonight. So, what's on your mind? KING LANDON You know, contrary to what people think, being a King isn't all fun and games. It's not as easy as it looks. Underneath this robe, this gold and these jewels, I am a man. A mere man. A man trying to lead as a King. And sometimes, the weight of the world on my shoulders is too much even for me. I've tried to lead a group of followers to greatness. And it's been a thankless job at times. I've had people stab me in the back from day one. Not understanding my vision for greatness. I've struggled with those who are unwilling, those who are unable and those who are just unneccessary. And lately, I've been struggling a lot. Sometimes, I sit in my royal throne and I ponder. I ponder and I wonder, "is it all worth it"? Should I just step down, relinquish my throne, go back to my humble roots. Back in the Enterprise locker room, Moneymaker grins wide. Landon looks sad, but suddenly straightens up. KING LANDON But then I remember who I am. I am King Landon! No matter what the OAOAST says, I am a King! Yes, my Kingdom has fallen on some hard times lately. But my Kingdom is not in ruins. The Enterprise locker room continue to look on, amused. SPENCER Can you believe this goofball? BRANNIGAN With all due respect, we've been hearing this kind of talk for a while now Landon. It's gonna take more than a few semi-fancy words to convince people. KING LANDON I agree. That's not why I'm out here. The time for talking is over... well, almost. I have more to say. The time for just talking is over. The time for action is here! I don't need to convince any of these people about me. I need to convince my Kingdom. The lowly subjects will follow in time. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" KING LANDON For too long, people have tried to tear me down, tear my Kingdom down. Well, I say if they try to tear it down, we will rebuild! Not concerned by this rallying cry are The Enterprise locker room. MONEYMAKER This pompous idiot. You know who'd love this. Christian. Get Christian in here! Where's Christian? Back out in the arena, Landon has hit his stride, chest puffed out in defiance. KING LANDON A few months ago, I did lose a protége. But the fact is, I 'lost' him because I wanted to. Enough was enough. I was sick of his incompetence and quite frankly, whoever ends up dealing with his incompetence is welcome to it. But, I made a mistake. I took my eye off the ball. And although I didn't need that incompetent guy anymore, I made the mistake of not replacing him. That was a chance to inject fresh blood into the Kingdom and I should have done it. Well, better late than never. BRANNIGAN Is this the announcement? KING LANDON This is the announcement. And it's going to trump a certain other person's 'big announcement'. See, I don't just recruit any down-on-his-luck boot licker to my Kingdom. Heaven forbid! I wanted somebody worthy of being in the Kingdom. And, as luck would have it, I got approached by somebody. Somebody who's had some problems lately. Somebody who's been looking to change his allegiances, to a real leader. Suddenly, the jovial mood in the Enterprise locker room has dampened a little. Blonde looks hurt at the cheapshots taken at him, but Moneymaker looks far more concerned. KING LANDON It's funny. Sometimes in life, you reap what you sow. BRANNIGAN That's very profound. What's gotten into you, Landon? KING LANDON What's gotten into me are the words of a profound man. A man who's going to take the Kingdom to new heights. Allow me to present, the newest member of The Cucaracha Kingdom... CHRISTIAN WRIGHT!!!!!!! COLE WOW!! MONEYMAKER From the back, Wright walks out and joins King Landon on the stage with a handshake. The crowd react in surprise, if not enjoyment, to this announcement. Meanwhile, in the Enterprise locker room, Lorelei, Spencer and CMJ all freak out, around Moneymaker who sits with his jaw on the floor, aghast. BRANNIGAN Is this for real, Christian? You're telling me you've swapped the Enterprise for the Kingdom? WRIGHT Astute as always, Mr. Brannigan. It has become abundantly apparent to me, that my tenure in The Enterprise has met it's natural, inevitable conclusion. Mister Moneymaker's appreciation has transformed into accustomization. Lately, I have been taken for granted. Oppressed and played for a fool. King Landon spoke great truth and I came to an awakening. My talents and my acumen have surpassed those of my former employer. Moreover, he had become a restraint. I owe him a debt of gratitude, but I owe him no more than that. Which is why, upon termination of my obligations with his organisation, I have enlisted with a new cause. And on August 28th, free from restraint, I shall face Theodore Moneymaker, the man who tarnished my undefeated streak, for the OAOAST United States Championship! Moneymaker continues to watch dumbstruck, as Landon beams with joy. KING LANDON Finally. A protége who can string two words together! BRANNIGAN Did you understand any of them? KING LANDON That's not important. What's important is, the Kingdom is back. And at AngleSlam, we will have gold once again. Let this be a lesson, a warning, a... a... WRIGHT Proclamation? KING LANDON Yes! A proclamation, to all of the OAOAST... don't mess with the King! BWAHAHAHA! "Parade Of The Charioteers" fires up again and King Landon hugs Queen Esther, barely able to contain his joy. Backstage, Theodore Moneymaker takes a deep breath, before storming out of the room. COLE Oh my! Landon Maddix just pulled a powerplay on The Enterprise! And now, AngleSlam, Theodore Moneymaker is finally going to have to deal with his former tag team partner, one on one, for the US Title! Folks, we will be back but please stay tuned for more HeldDOWN~!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 Returning to the arena we find the ring coated in red, purple and orange lights. Standing inside it is OAOAST Commissioner/President/General Manager Alfdogg. Behind him are numerous orange and black clad security officers. ALFDOGG Alright, we are here for the contract signing for the highly anticipated Angleslam contest between Badass Jack, Odin, and Alexander The Brutal. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” ALFDOGG I’m in here because no announcer or interviewer wanted to be anywhere near those three men. Frankly, I fear for my safety as well. And because contract signings never end well, I’ve brought a load of security to make some sort of attempt to keep the peace. But should I not make it out of here alive, which is very likely, I want you all to know that I love you very much. COACH Damn, Alfdogg is acting like these dudes is gonna mess him up big time. COLE I wouldn’t put it past any of them! They’ll go through anyone to get to the others. ALFDOGG Let’s get this underway. Introducing first….Badass Jack!Cause I'm a badass And you don't want to clash Cause your mouth's writing checks that your face can't cash Cause I'm a badass And this war is your last You just crossed my path and I'll drop you fast Badass Jack storms the ring to the tune of “Badass” by Saliva. Upon entering the squared circle he stares down the suddenly nervous security guards. ALFDOGG And Odin! plays to a negative reaction from the audience. Through parted entrance doors emerges The God Of War Odin. He strides down to the ring with a wide smile playing upon his bearded face. ALFDOGG And Alexander The Brutal! The crowd lets out a decent sized pop as “Disarm” comes into the arena. Stoic to the last, Alexander doesn’t acknowledge the cheers of the audience as he makes his way into the ring. ALFDOGG So far so good. You haven’t attacked one another yet. Jack is there anything you’d like to say before you sign the contract. JACK Yeah. You two, you’re stepping into the ring with the wrong man. I ain’t a normal wrestler. I ain’t for lockups, or arm drags or none of that. I am an animal. I am that monster you gotta look over your shoulder to make sure you’re a good distance ahead of. I ain’t got no remorse, no sympathy, and no feelings. I twirl a switch blade, I live with an alligator and three Dobermans and I don’t give a shit about anybody. I’m cold blooded and rotten to the core, and I’ll make you two regret the day you ever crossed me. Jack puts his signature to the paper. ALFDOGG Odin? ODIN Jack I hear you claim to be a cold blooded killer, and I hear the proclamations that Alexander is an unstoppable force to be feared and fled from. But, let me remind the world that I am more than a killer, and much more than a mere force. I am a god above all men! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” ODIN To stop me is to stop the world from turning, an impossibility. As a god I can see the future of mortals, and both of your futures are ones filled with blood, anguish and torment. And all three are brought on by me! Odin scribbles his name down on the sheet. ALFDOGG And Alexander? “BRUTAL! BRUTAL! BRUTAL!” ALEXANDER I do not know of gods nor do I know of animals. I only know the reality in which I reside in. In this reality I am no longer one third of the six man champions. This is due in large to part to your interference. I promised you that should you interfere in the match that vengeance would come swiftly and brutally. At Angleslam I will make good on my promise. Alexander writes his signature on the dotted line. ALFDOGG Hmmm. This all went surprisingly smooth! Just as soon as Alfdogg makes that claim, Jack surges forward to clothesline Alexander! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Odin jumps Jack from behind, attacking him with hard forearm shots. ALFDOGG (to the security guards) What are you waiting for? Christmas?! Get in there! The security guards jump in between the three men and try their hardest to separate them from their latest war. These efforts are almost pointless, as the three continually break free of the security guards to get at one another. COLE Folks, let's go to part two of the Duncan family reunion! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 DUNCAN FAMILY REUNION PART 2TYLER BRYANT is stood nervously by with...AMBERLYN DUNCAN TYLER I think, I’m gonna go outside and get some fresh air. I’ve been here a pretty long time. AMBERLYN Nonsense. TYLER I just…I really need air. AMBERLYN Did you eat some of the “pate”? You know that’s denture cream, right? You’re not going anywhere, I need you around to make all my cousins jealous. They think their fancy Harvard law degrees make them so special? Well, I’ve got a hot boyfriend, so your Harvard law and $250,000 a year salary can eat it! TYLER A Harvard law degree is pretty impressive. AMBERLYN For a man or a butch lesbo like Krista! If you’re a girl its all about having a hot boyfriend with a nice ride! Which reminds, you really need a better car. I can’t keep dating you if you’re going to keep driving that Jetta. Wait, here I’m going to go get us some sodas. Diet of course, you look like you have the potential to get fat. I can’t date a fat guy, unless he’s loaded, and you aren’t that loaded. Which we’ll discuss later, because that’s a problem to. As soon as Amberlyn leaves, her mother, Genevieve, swoops in on Tyler. She admires him with lust filled eyes. GENEVIEVE She wasn’t lying. TYLER Oh boy. GENEVIEVE Trendy haircut, finely shaped lips, skinny jeans to show off that rock hard ass, TYLER Um….. GENEVIEVE I can see why you’ve got my daughter’s heart all aflutter. You are quite the handsome little boy. TYLER Um…thanks. GENEVIEVE I bet you’re also a naughty boy. GENEVIEVE I bet you have fantasies of doing nasty perverted things to my daughter, don’t you? I bet there’s all kinds of sick and twisted things you want to do to her. But the problem is Amberlyn is a bit of a prissy thing. She’s the type to worry about her hair getting messed up instead of worrying about pleasing her man. But, I happen to be different. I have years of experience on Amberlyn, and I know all about satisfying my lover, slamming him against the wall, dropping to my knees, opening my mouth and taking all of him in. TYLER I really need that fresh air. Badly. Before things can get any worse for Tyler, and believe me they’re plenty bad, Amberlyn walks over with two diet sodas. AMBERLYN Oh mom. Hi. GENEVIEVE Hello, Amber. Tyler and I were just discussing….the weather. Isn’t that right, Tyler? TYLER Yes! **** Maya is involved in a conversation with a female family member in her fifties. ALICE My husband and I are purchasing another home in Spain. It’s a tad bit expensive and we already have two, but I sometimes you’ve just to splurge! MAYA I work with this crazy guy from Spain that thinks he’s a King, so if you run into him when you’re over there please punch him in the face for me. ALICE I’ll do my best. What about Maya and her romantic life? You must not have any time for boys with the music, and clothing line and the modeling. All very amazing pursuits especially for a girl your age. I wonder what your sister is doing? It doesn’t seem like she’s an equal to your own success. MAYA Its hard with her physical deformities. ALICE Of course how insensitive of me. Does she even have a boyfriend? MAYA No, the relationships usually role out the following questions “Jade, can you stop snorting when you laugh?” “No!” “Jade, can you shave your unsightly mustache?” “No!”, “Jade, will you be hunch backed in ten years?” “Yes!” And from there the relationship slowly devolves into a fiery wreck for us to all laugh at and mock. ****** Dejected and depressed over how the event has gone for her, Jade is half listening to a male family member in his late thirties prattle on. MAN So I just a made a million trading hedge funds, its all very exciting stuff but I suppose it goes over your head doesn’t it. JADE What? Why would it go over my head? MAN Your sister told me all about your illness and the brain damage. JADE Brain damage? Illness? MAN Crack is a terrible thing. I’m just glad, you’re trying to get clean. JADE I don’t have brain damage! I don’t smoke crack! I’m the OAOAST Women’s Champion! MAN I see. Well, good for you, I suppose. I’m going to go find Maya, she’s such an interesting young lady to talk to. JADE Grrrrrrrrrr. That’s it! MOLLY (O.S.) Jade, I know what you’re thinking, but now isn’t the place. JADE You don’t know what its like to have an annoying sister. MOLLY (O.S.) I know what its like to have five of them. JADE Ok, so maybe you do. And you know you can only be pushed so much before you have to start pushing back! And Maya is long overdue to get pushed! Jade finds Maya at the punch bowl. With a furious face, she roughly spins her little sister around. MAYA Jeez, what do you want, chubs? Its not my turn to fill up your water bowl. JADE I just want to do this.POW! FAMILY MEMBERS Jade dives atop Maya much to everyone’s immense shock. The two girls are tangled into a hellish fight, as they tear and claw at one another. KRISTA Alix! Alix, do something! Alix LOWERS HERSELF FROM THE CEILING! ALIX Hey Sister, Go Sister, Soul Sister, Go Sister! Hey Sister, Go Sister, Soul Sister, Go Sister! Hey Sister, Go Sister, Soul Sister, Go Sister! Hey Sister, Go Sister, Soul Sister, Go Sister! KRISTA Do something else! ALIX What I've got you've got to give it to your mamma! What I've got you've got to give it to your pappa! What I've got you've got to give it to your daughter! You do a little dance and then you drink a little water! What I've got you've got to get it put it in you! What I've got you've got to get it put it in you! What I've got you've got to get it put it in you! Reeling with the feeling don't stop continue! Luckily, Tyler is there to pull Jade away from Maya. This only helps for a short little while. Once that little while is up, Maya surges forward and tackles Jade out Tyler’s arms. From there the fight begins anew with the girls trying their hardest to maul one another. We cut back to Sofa Central. COACH All I can say is wow! COLE Alix is going to have her hands full at Angleslam.COMING UP NEXT THE MAINEVENTREJECT, BOHEMOTH, LEON RODEZ VS NAT BLACK, NED BLANCHARD, BARON WINDELSNEXT!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony149 Posted April 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 *DINGDINGDING* Reject starts for his team, with his two partners barely acknowledging each others existance as they stand about a foot apart either side of the post. In opposite is Baron, ready to go with his recent rival. COLE Two former World Champions, back in the title mix at AngleSlam and back in the mix with each other here tonight. Baron and Reject lock up. The two battle for position and when neither gets an advantage, they break apart and stare each other down. Scowling, Reject offers a knuckle lock. As Baron goes to lock hands, Reject then surprises him with a kick to the knee! Baron goes down to a knee and Reject fires off a couple of right hands. Reject then hits the ropes and runs right into a hard shoulder tackle! COLE Oof! COACH Looks like Baron's got that preseason fever, baby! Snatching hold of Reject's arm before he can get away Baron wrings the arm, hammering away with some right hands to the arm. Baron then reaches out and tags Nathaniel Black. COLE Here's the man our President Alfdogg says is the one to watch next Sunday night, Nathaniel Black. Black clubs Reject's prone arm, then takes over with a hammerlock, forcing Reject down to the mat. Reject grumbles in pain, muffled by the canvas he's being pressed into. With the arm held in place, Black drops a knee. Reject grimaces and tries to get back to his feet. As he does so, Black transfers into a front facelock. He then goes back to the arm, wringing it hard and flipping Reject onto his back, into a wristlock. COLE And with Reject in trouble, an ice cold atmosphere is waiting in his corner. No love lost between Bohemoth and Rodez. COACH The two biggest loners in wrestling. For two different reasons. Getting back to his feet again, Reject pops Black with a forearm to the jaw. And another one. Reject then reverses the wristlock into one of his own. But Black quickly counters, putting his back to Reject and elbowing him! Black re-applies the wristlock, then makes the tag to Blanchard. COLE Quick tags being made on this side, certainly more cohesion than we're seeing out of the opposition. Off the top, Ned drops a double axe across Reject's outstretched arm. Ned quickly slaps on an armbar to keep control. But Reject catches him with a knee to escape. Whipped to the ropes, Ned counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the chest. Reject tries to come back with a clothesline. But Ned ducks, catching Reject with a back suplex! Cover... 1... 2... No! As Ned goes to pick Reject back up, the New York native surprises him with a jawbreaker! With Ned stunned, Reject takes the opportunity to make a tag, to Bohemoth. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" The World Champion comes in hot and tries to grab a hold of the Handsome Hustler. However Ned sees him coming and evades his grasp, then unloads with right hands as Bo turns around! Tired of being punched in the face, Bohemoth eventually reaches out and grabs Ned by the throat, shoving him backwards. Ned uses the ropes to bounce back, catching Bohemoth with a dropkick to the knee! Ned then rolls over and tags Baron. COLE Smart by Ned. A bit less of a size difference between Baron and Bohemoth than him and Bo. As Bohemoth picks himself up, Baron comes off the ropes in front of him with a shoulder tackle! Neither man budges and Bohemoth yells at Baron to try again. Not one to back down, the big Texan throws himself at Bohemoth again, but Bohemoth stands his ground. Bo yells at Baron to go for one more. Baron, figures he needs a little something extra, rallies up the crowd before he goes. As Baron hits the ropes, Bohemoth this time throws a big boot... but Baron manages to deflect it away. Baron hits a clothesline, knocking Bo back a couple of steps. He takes those steps right back towards Baron, swinging with his own clothesline. But Baron sidesteps and rolls Bohemoth up! 1... 2... NO! Baron quickly comes off the ropes once more, but gets caught with a side slam! COACH There's the power! That's why he's the Champ! As Bohemoth backs away, preparing his next move, he gets a slap on the shoulder. Deemed a tag by the referee, bringing Leon Rodez in. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE I'm not so sure Bohemoth was ready to leave just yet. COACH Yeah, that wasn't the most cohesive tag you're ever gonna see. Bohemoth holds his temper, merely annoyed as he leaves the ring. Rodez takes over, stomping away on Baron. The Fallen Idol then lures in a predictably hot Ned Blanchard, using a blatant choke on Baron as the referee prevents Ned from getting into the ring. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Ned is just dying to get his hands on Leon Rodez, particularly after what happened a couple of weeks ago. And he may get his chance at AngleSlam. He may get his chance tonight! Once Ned is put out by the referee, Leon goes back to following the rules. He delivers a kneedrop and makes a cover... 1... 2... No! Trying to keep control, Leon applies a front facelock. But Baron refuses to stay down and like a bucking bronco, he tries to force Leon off of him. Eventually Leon is forced to let go and slams Baron with a knee strike to calm him down. And a second. Baron drops to one knee and Leon rears back, with a simple kick to the face! "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" Unconcerned by the fans, Rodez waits for Baron to get back up. He slams another knee into his ribs, leaving Baron winded. An irish whip sends Baron into a neutral corner. Leon follows in with a clothesline. Leon then whips Baron across the ring, to the opposite corner, where he hits a double knee strike to the chest. COLE Nice to see Leon sticking around to fight, for once. COACH Why wouldn't he? He's got big ol' Baron on his knees, at his mercy. He's doin' that work. COLE Well, Leon's not going to have much of a choice at AngleSlam, he's going to be locked inside that Elimination Chamber and he'll have nowhere to run then. Both Bohemoth and Reject stretch out their hands for a tag, but are met with a look of contempt from Leon. Instead of tagging out, Rodez pushes Baron up against the middle rope and stands on his back, choking him across the rope! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FO..." Seeing enough, Ned comes in and smacks Leon in the back, before being restrained by the referee. Leon looks appalled at being hit and demands the referee do something. BLANCHARD Kiss my ass you little bastard! COLE Tempers are threatening to boil over in this one. Nailing Baron with a couple of right hands, Leon turns and hits the ropes. Recovering, Baron throws a big boot to try and cut him off. But Leon ducks underneath! As Baron turns around, Rodez is waiting, clipping him with a rolling sobat. Hooking him up, Leon then goes for an Exploder... but Baron doesn't go! COLE Uh oh. Leon tries again, to no avail. And a third time, at which point he starts to sense trouble. Sure enough, Baron re-positions Leon's arm... and takes him over with a high vertical suplex!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" Clutching his back in pain, suddenly Leon is perfectly fine with the idea of tagging out and both men crawl towards their corners. Leon gets there first and tags in Reject, who rushes in and grabs Baron by the ankle. Only for Baron to break free and dive to make the tag to Black! COLE Tag! Reject couldn't prevent it! Black comes in firing, laying into Reject with a succession of forearms. He whips Reject to the ropes and throws a back elbow, but Reject ducks. Reject then tries a spinning heel kick. But Black ducks that and knocks Reject down with a standing lariat! Bohemoth immediately jumps in and goes after Black, as Ned rushes past and goes after Leon! COACH Whoa, wait a minute! COLE There goes Leon! Rodez takes off around the ring, trying to get away from Ned. As the chase goes on outside, Bohemoth sets Black up for a powerbomb, but gets backdropped over the top to the floor! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" With Bohemoth out of the way, Black turns away to go after Reject. But Reject surprises him with a quick boot and an almost quicker DDT! Cover by Reject... 1... 2... Kickout! Reject waits for Black to get back up and starts to strike him with kicks to the body. With Black softened up, Reject then takes aim with a roundhouse, targetting the head... but MISSING the head. Black ducks and as Reject spins back around, the Englishman gives Reject a closer look at the head. Literally, by smashing it right into Reject's jaw! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Dayyum! COLE That's a great way to break a jawbone. As Reject clutches his face, Black slams a forearm into the kidneys. Reject arches back in pain, allowing Black to hook him up and deliver a final cut! COLE Chelsea Dagger! Leg hooked... 1... 2... Kickout! Black gets back up and begins to wave Reject to his feet, when Leon suddenly rolls in beside him. Concerned with getting away from Ned, Leon isn't watching where he's going and walks right into a clothesline! "YYYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COLE BAM! Meanwhile, Reject gets back up, just as Baron comes off with top with the flying clothesline!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE I guess it was Clobberin' Time! Bodies continue flying, as Bohemoth slides back in undetected, taking Black out with a clothesline! Bohemoth then runs across the ring, taking Baron out with a YAKUZA KICK!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Look out! Big Bo's on the loose! Bohemoth sees Ned coming at him and reacts quickly, with a SPINEBUSTER! Everybody else is down apart from the World Champion, who stands in the middle of the ring and flexes his arms to the sides. BOHEMOTH IT'S ALL... ABOUT... MEEEE!!! *THUMBS DOWN* "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Apparantly that's the signal, as Bohemoth catches hold of Baron and scoops him in his arms. Carrying Baron around, he prepares to hit the B-Trayal, when Black suddenly stirs and clips his knee with a chopblock! 1... 2... Bohemoth pushes Baron off of him! COLE Wow, the champ almost got pinned right there! Bohemoth gets up hobbling and is hit with a clothesline from Black. He goes back a few steps, falling into the ropes. Quickly, Black links arms with Baron and together, they clothesline Bohemoth over the top to the outside! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" Following him outside, Baron takes the fight to Bohemoth. Meanwhile, Black turns around and gets caught with a rolling sobat from Rodez! Wringing the arm, Rodez then hits the SOUL DESTROYER! Black rolls away near the bottom rope, so Leon abandons going after him, turning his attention instead to Ned. COACH Come on Ned, now's your chance! COLE Ned just got hit with a spinebuster! He's hurt and Leon knows it, that's the only reason he's not hightailing it right now! Crouched down, Leon waits for Ned to get back up. Ned stumbles around, still shaken up from the spinebuster. And as he starts to get his bearings, he takes a step towards Leon, who responds with a flash SUPERKICK! Ned's head snaps back and he falls to one knee, set up for the rolling sobat... ...NO. Before Leon can launch into his spin, Reject suddenly spins Ned around and delivers the EULOGY instead!! COACH EULOGY~!~!1~!1~!1#!!1!!1 Reject jumps up and starts to celebrate. But Leon doesn't join in. Instead, he SHOVES Reject in the chest for getting involved in his business! COACH Uh oh. COLE Oh boy. Talk about no love lost, this is love lost! At first, Reject seems to be willing to laugh the shove off, holding his hands up and beginning to turn away... ...but then, he STRIKES, WITH A SUDDEN EULOGY TO LEON!!!!! "YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" COLE EULOGY!! REJECT JUST EULOGISED HIS OWN PARTNER! COACH Well, I'd be lying if I said I didn't see that coming. Reject looks down at Leon and shrugs, as if he had no other choice. Looking to make it three in a row, Reject then leaps up and catches Black... ...NO! Black shoves Reject off, countering the Eulogy! And with Reject off balance, he launches forward with a LARIAT to the back of the head!! BLACK OVER! COLE What a shot, Reject may be out! And Black may be setting him up for the Brittania Bomb! Crossing up the arms, Black elevates Reject up... and SITS OUT WITH THE BRITTANIA BOMB!!!! 1... 2... 3!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" *DINGDINGDING* Black shoves Reject away and climbs to his feet, raising his fists in the air as the crowd erupt. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the match... the team of BARON WINDELS, NED BLANCHARD and NATHANIEL BLLLAAAAAAACCKK!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" On the outside, Bohemoth looks aghast, as Black stands victorious in the middle of the ring. COLE What a victory, for Baron, Ned and especially for Black, who just pinned another former World Champion! Black isn't settling for just his win and invites Bohemoth to come into the ring to carry things on. But the World Champ decides not to, backing away and leaving, frustrated at how his night's gone but not about to let it get any worse. Baron rolls back in and slaps Black on the back in congratulations, Bohemoth warning them both they're in serious trouble, from a safe distance. COLE The odds don't look quite so good for Bohemoth, next Sunday night. Because in the Elimination Chamber, like tonight, it will not be just about him. It'll be about five other competitors as well! And who knows what's going to happen inside the Chamber? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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