Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 TV 14 L, VPRESENTED IN OAOASTHD* DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA *Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid's shock and delight. In honor of tonight's show being held in South Beach...BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! B O O M ~! The crowd roars in excitement as we pan around the sold out American Airlines Arena.LIVE Miami, Florida COLE Welcome to Miami! Michael Cole alongside Da Coach and we're not wasting any time getting this party underway! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 The acidic rock of Slither fires up, as gigantic snake’s head spews flames from its eyes. Through the mouth of this ferocious beast comes Simon Singleton, clad in orange tights with a silver snake down the left hand side, and a tombstone on the right. At his side, dutifully filming his entrance is art student Molly Nerdly. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of twenty minutes! Now making his way to the ring, being accompanied by Molly Nerdly, he is from Orange County, California, BOX OFFICE SIMON SINGLEEETTTTTTOOOOOOONNNNNN! Molly films Simon as he fist bumps his way down the asile. That’s right fist bump. Simon is too cool for hand slapping. COLE The MLB All Star game was held in Orange County a few weeks back, and we’ve got an All Star in Simon Singleton here with us tonight. If he wins then he succeeds in his goal of ending Christian Wright’s win streak. Simon styles his hair in front of Molly’s camera, putting a playful smile on the film buff’s face. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum (Jesus Walks) God show me the way because the Devil trying to break me down (Jesus Walks with me) The only thing that that I pray is that my feet don't fail me now (Jesus Walks) And I don't think there is nothing I can do now to right my wrongs (Jesus Walks with me) I want to talk to God but I'm afraid because we ain't spoke in so long Molly’s smile and the joy of the audience are erased by the arrival of Jesus Walks. Yellow and green lights illuminate the beach setting, and hearald the arrival of Christian Wright and Lorelei DeCenzo, clad in a lovely sequened black backless gown. CW welcomes the hatred of the booing audience with outstretched hands. He then releases the disgust with a throwing of his hands and green and yellow pyro spears the air. BUFFER And the opponent! Being accompanied by Lorelei DeCenzo, he hails from Washington DC, weighing in at 8 1/3 bars of gold, THE GOD CHILD CHRIIIISTTTTTIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAANNNNNN WWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHHHHHHHHHHHTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Wright and Lorelei stroll down the entry way with heads held high and noses held even higher. Simon and Molly regard them with disgust, with Simon ordering his once good friend into the ring. COLE There’s a lot of hatred between these two former teammates, and a lot riding on this match. Christian Wright has a chance to erase his DQ loss to J-MAX caused by Simon by defeating Simon. DING DING DING The two competitors circle each other for several seconds before coming together for a lockup. They tussle and struggle against one another until Simon gains the upperhand with a hammerlock. He twists and turns on Wright’s arm, causing a high level of discomfort. Fortunatley it doesn’t last for very long, as Wright reverses the hold into a side armbar. COLE I’m not so sure Christian Wright should be playing a technical came with Simon Singleton of all people. Just to infuriate CW, Singleton begins yawning in boredom. Wright tries to tighten his hold in response to BOSS’ taunting. But this meets in failure as Singleton sweeps Wright’s legs, and holds control of his right wrist. The God Child doesn’t stay grounded for very long, as he kips up and snaps on an arm lock. Wright then switches into a side headlock and wrenches on Simon’s neck. This causes BOSS a bit of pain, but not so much that he’s unable to shove his foe into the ropes. Wright bounces back with a flying elbow, but Singleton catches him within his arms. He then runs forward and drives CW’s back into the ring posts. This alarms Lorelei, and she calls for an immediate disqualifaction, for some strange reason. COLE A surprising show of power from Box Office Simon Singleton. COACH I didn’t think he had it in him. Singleton grabs onto CW’s arm and throws him across the ring to the opposite corner. He charges in after him, but CW evades any attack by ducking through the ropes. Singleton’s body slams against the turnbuckle posts, and he goes staggering backwards in pain. It’s a pain that’s only increased when Wright nails him with a springboard dropkick. “CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS! CHRISTIAN SUCKS!” WRIGHT SILENCE! Wright begins scraping Simon off the canvas. But halfway up, BOSS surprises his former friend with an STO! He rolls through and executes another one! Thinking that the third time is a charm, BOSS rolls CW back to his feet to repeat the attack. But The God Child counters with a blatant low blow that has Molly and the audience calling for a DQ. COLE That just wasn’t right! COACH CW’s win streak in on the line, Mikey, he’s gotta do whatever it takes to preserve it. Wright stomps about the ring, irritated by the chastisement from numerous parties. Lorelei encourages him to refocus, as Simon is getting to his feet. He follows this advice and attacks his foe with vicious European Uppercuts. After the final blow lands, Wright grabs onto Simon’s long black hair and hurls him over the ropes to the outside in front of Lorelei. As you can guess this is to Simon’s disadvantge; Lorelei lifts him up and Wright connects with a baseball slide to the jaw! Simon falls back against the guardrail, where the audience pats him on the back and urges him to get back in the game. “LET’S GO SIMON! LET’S GO SIMON! LET’S GO SIMON!” Wright pries Simon away from the guardrail and slams his face into the ring mat before dumping him into the squared circle. The God Child then climbs onto the ring apron, and slingshots himself into the ring with a leg drop. A cover quickly follows… ONE! TWO! Simon throws his shoulder off the canvas! He attempts to crawl upright but is hindered by the front facelock applied by CW. Rather than perform any sort of attack, Wright merely keeps his opponent trapped inside the basic submission hold. The audience rallies around Simon, trying to will him to fight free. The cheers and chants help tremendously; Simon begins throwing body blows to escape the hold. COLE Simon getting out of that submission, and what can he do now that he’s free? Simon whips CW into the ropes, but faces a lariat on the rebound. He ducks the attack, and The God Child runs the ropes once more. When he comes back to BOSS, he’s taken for a nauseating and painful ride with a tilt a whirl backbreaker! CW is in incredible anguish, and grabs onto his back to protect it from further beating. Simon isn’t what we’d call sympathetic, and mocks CW by mimicking his actions. COACH This dude don’t have no sportsmanship. He’s a bad example for the kids. COLE And Christian Wright is? Simon attempts to hurl his foe into the corner. But CW reverses the attack and dumps Simon against the posts. BOSS stumbles towards the center of the ring, where a nasty European uppercut drops him to the canvas. Wright plants a pair of kicks into Simon’s skull before clamping down on his neck with another front facelock. Simon can’t be grounded for long, however, as he quickly begins fighting to his feet. CW tries his hardest to keep the hold tight, but that’s a difficult task made all the more imposible by the punches BOSS throws into his stomach. Eventually Simon wins his freedom much to the audience’s delight. He and CW trade punches for several seconds, before The God Child lashes forward with a lariat. But BOSS deftly ducks the attack, and comes behind CW. Within moments Wright is being launched through the air with a release German suplex! The move earns so much height that The God Child lands on his stomach instead of his back. COACH Dayum~! Singleton takes a knee and breathes heavily, the german suplex taking its toll on his body. Wright fares no better, strewn about the canvas with muscles aching. The referee hasn’t much choice but to begin a count on both competitors… ONE! TWO! THREE! “LET’S GO SIMON! LET’S GO SIMON! LET’S GO SIMON!” the fans and Molly chant, while Lorelei gruffly orders Christian upright. Both forms of encouragement work wonders, as each performer heads to their feet. Wright draws first blood with a punch aimed at BOSS’ head. But Simon fires back with equal force and soon the two men are locked into a deadly brawl. Wright attempts to gain the advantage on the situation by throwing himself off the ropes. But when he returns he’s caught by a back elbow from Orange County resident. Wright hastily returns to his feet, but is pounced upon by BOSS and sent into the ropes. When he returns, Singleton upends him with a back body drop! COLE Wright is in double jeopardy, in danger of having the J-MAX loss stay on his record, and in danger of having his streak of not being pinned or submitted snapped. Wright crawls to the corner, eager to gain some reprieve from the beating. But no reprieve is forthcoming as Singleton picks him and shoots him to the opposite corner. He charges in after his foe, but CW lifts up his loafers and smacks BOSS dead in the face. Singleton teeters backwards, causing Wright to sniff blood in the water. Thus he charges forward only to be the victim of a sitout hiptoss! Singleton crawls on top of him for a cover… ONE! TWO! Wright manages to power out the pin. COLE The win streak is hanging by a thread! COACH No it ain’t, that loss to J-MAX is gonna get erased because no one has pinned The God Child in over a year. Singleton bounces back and forth on his boots, waiting for CW to rise. Once The God Child comes to his feet, Singleton captures him in his arm in set up for the Blockbuster Hold! But CW reverses the attack and spikes BOSS head into the canvas with a DDT! As Lorelei applauds the counter, CW hooks onto the legs for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Simon pushes himself out the pinfall. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE Maybe its Simon who can’t be defeated? Wright holds his head in hands and damns the referee for a perceived slow count. Once done lamenting the poor officiating, CW puts himself off the ropes. But as he comes back he’s lifted up and afflicted with a Manhattan Drop! With Wright hobbled, Simon builds up speed on the ropes and comes back to bulldog his one time associate. A pin is then made, as Molly counts along… ONE! TWO! Wright preserves his win streak by kicking out. Unfortunatley he’s placed in immediate danger as Singleton attempts to apply an ankle lock! But before any damage can be done, Wright rolls through and captures BOSS in a pin… ONE! TWO! BOSS rolls out the pinall. Both men come to their feet, where Singleton charges with a lariat. But CW counters with a snap powerslam! The referee scores the pinfall… ONE! TWO! Simon kicksout! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” With Singleton down for the moment, Wright heads to the ring apron. He takes a lesiruely stroll up to the top rope and then spreads his wings as though he were an eagle about to take flight. A smile appears on his face as he flies forward with a body splash! But Singleton kips up and dropkicks him in the chest! Wright tumbles through the air before crashing into the canvas a broken mess. He’s a mess that’s easily pinned by BOSS… ONE! TWO! Kickout! COLE Every pinfall in this match is so pivotal, especially if you’re Christian Wright. Singleton hunches over his foe as he begins to make an unsteady rise. Once Wright is somewhat upright, he’s captured into Simon’s arms for the Blockbuster Hold. But Wright quickly shifts his position and rolls up Singleton! However, before a pin can be made, BOSS manueveurs through the pin and starts to grab a leg lock! Fearful for his health, Wright kicks at Singleton’s face and eventually backs him into the ropes. Wright senses that this an opportune moment to strike and runs at Simon. But the Orange County native ducks low and upends Wright over the ropes! The God Child barely manages to come down with his feet on the ring apron. It’s a feat not unnoticed by a worried Lorelei on the outside. Wright gives her some reassurance by shoulder blocking Simon and sunset flipping back into the ring… ONE! TWO! Singleton kicksout! He comes to his feet, breathing heavy. Wright pounces on him and captures him in setup for an Alabama slam type move. But BOSS reaches forward and clamps down on the ropes, forcing a break. Annoyed with this, CW throws himself off the ropes to strike down his foe. But as he returns, Simon sidesteps his shoulder charge, and he slams stomach first into the ropes. CW bounces backwards and is thrown backwards by a release German suplex! Singleton makes things seem easy by dusting his hands off. “SIMON! SIMON! SIMON!” Singleton takes Wright into his arms for another try at the Blockbuster Hold. But once again Wright foils his plans this time by wheeling out with an arm drag! Singleton is quick to his feet, however, and dashes to Wright. But Wright greets his arrival with a Wright Off (sky high)! The refereee counts the resulting pinfall… ONE! TWO! THRE-NO! Lorelei has a few choice words for the referee while the fans celebrate Singleton’s miraculous kickout. Meanwhile Wright picks Simon up by his streaming black hair. BOSS fights him off with a flurry of punches that’s only stopped by the eye rake delivered by The God Child! Wright then runs the ropes, but comes back to a tilt whirl effort. Fortunately for him, he’s able to glide out the attack. BOSS is stunned by this and his surprise allows him to be easily floored by Wright’s European Uppercut. Wright then goes for another pin… ONE! TWO! Simon pops out the pin, bringing out cheers from the sold out Miami audience. COLE It’s a party here in Miami, but its nothing but frustration for Christian Wright so far. Wright begins to scrape Simon off the canvas by his orange tights. But Simon stuns him by grabbing hold of him and speedily executing the Blockbuster Hold! COLE He got it! A crucial pinfall is then made… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! But Lorelei has distracted the referee with some sensuous and highly arousing grinding of her slender sexual hips. COLE Come on! COACH Only you would complain about something like that. Singleton stomps over to the referee to gain his attention. But he meets with rotten luck as Wright school boys him! ONE! TWO! FOOT ON THE ROPES! THREE! NO! COLE These have got to be tense moments for Christian Wright. COACH They’re tense moments for me! I can’t believe the win streak is on the verge of being officially kaput. Singleton runs to the ropes, only to have his foot latched onto by Lorelei. SIMON Oh Moooolllllyyyyyyy. Molly charges over to Lorelei and spears the raven haired vixen to the ground! MOLLY You rang, BOSS? Satisfied, Simon turns back towards Wright…AND IS HIT WITH THE STOCKMARKET CRASH (Gordbuster)! COLE Oh my! Wright then dives atop his opponent for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! THREE! DING DING DING BUFFER Your winner as a result of a pinfall, CHRISTIIAAAAAAAAAAANNNNN WRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIGHHHHHHHHHHHTTTTTTTTT! There’s a plethora of boos as “Jesus Walks” plays over the speakers. Wright falls onto his back and smiles, able to rest easy now that his win streak has been restored. COACH The streak is back on! COLE That’s correct, folks. With a victory here against Box Office Simon Singleton, Christian Wright has erased his previous DQ loss to J-MAX. The streak lives on. Who will be the one to finally stop Christian Wright once and for all?LATER MR. DICK vs. BARON WINDELS FOR THE WORLD TITLE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 Alix and Krista are seen walking backstage with Krista eating a protein bar. She finishes up her tasty snack and throws it at the trash can, missing it by inches. KRISTA Oops missed it. ALIX Missed it? Ya know we totally live in a super throw away culture? First we throw away our trash, then we throw away our minds, then we throw away our values, and then we throw away our souls, and ya know what happens when you throw away your souls? You become a lesbian. KRISTA We’re lesbians! ALIX I’m bisexual. I only threw away half my soul. Before Krista can present any sort of argument, her mother arrives to interrupt. GENEVIEVE Krista, Mexican tart. KRISTA Woah, whoa, are we bringing the racism all of sudden? ALIX Bring in the noise, bring in the funk, bring in the Klu Klux Klan! GENEVIEVE Its not racist. KRISTA Chink, gook, nigger, honkey, cracker, spic, these are a few of my mother’s favorite things. GENEVIEVE Honey, that’s what she is she’s Mexican. KRISTA Not in that context! GENEVIEVE Oh, is she Japanese sometimes when she goes to the Sushi Bar? She goes to the KFC and then she’s black? Is that it? KRISTA More racism! Mother, what do you want, besides to be stoned to death by Jesse Jackson? GENEVIEVE And besides to tell you that your lesbian relationship is the scourge of my existence and I wish this Mexican tart nothing but the most inhumane of torture? ALIX You mean getting boned by Krista with a strap on after she’s had five bottles of Dos Equis and just watched The Lakers lose in overtime? GENEVIEVE Grrrrrrrr. I came to tell you, not that its any of your business, that I’m writing Jock into my will. KRISTA And I came to tell you that you’re completely out of your mind. GENEVIEVE Honey, he’s had such a hard life. KRISTA Yeah, that penis pump turning his dick green was really rough on not just him but the entire nation. A hero has fallen, god save America. GENEVIEVE His family, has had a hard life as well. ALIX Well, yeah, if my son was running around in assless chaps and being blown by a Canadian tranny I’d have a pretty hard life to. GENEVIEVE No one asked for your opinion of anything, honey, I’m just surprised you have the brain matter to formulate one. Regardless, Jock’s dad was in Vietnam. KRISTA On a business trip in the 90’s! GENEIVEVE And his gradfather was in Germany. KRISTA Yeah, as a Nazi sympathizer! Alix feigns shock and horror. GENEVIEVE I just came to tell you the news, not to debate it. KRISTA Not to debate it? You don’t want to argue our problems in front of numerous people we don’t know? That’s so unjewish! GENEVIEVE Actually, Jock suggested I convert. I’m giving it serious consideration. While Krista searches for the right response to this stunning statement, Genevieve turns to walk off in the opposite direction. ALIX That’s not such a big deal. Diet Dr.Pepper taste just like regular Dr.Pepper. KRISTA Not what she meant. A cloak of flashing white lights hang over the entrance stage. From the sound system pours the epic tones of Smashing Pumpkin’s http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KhOs-zBeRHs. A rusted cage rises from the netherworld (or beneath the stage if you prefer) onto the entrance ramp. Behind these dilapidated bars stands a thickly muscled 6’4 man. In left hand rests a sharpened blood soaked blade, while his right holds onto a battle worn shield. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of ten minutes! Now making his way to ring for his first apperance in the OAOAST, he hails from Kavala, Greece, he is THE MODERN DAY GLADIATOR….ALEXANDER THE BRUUUTTAAAAALLLLL! The cage door rips open, releasing Alexander to the intimidated world. The shredded gladiator stalks a path down the entrance ramp, his fear inducing sword held to his side. He stares at the ring with malice in his eyes and fists clenched into tight balls. COACH He looks like he can do some damage! COLE Indeed he can. Our first ever superstar from the country of Greece looks to make a name for himself at the Ultimate Beach Party. BUFFER And his opponent, from Mexico, UNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Uno chants a voodoo spell, hoping to place early injury on his Greek opponent. COLE Uno’s partner Dos was recently put on the DL by Krista- COACH Who broke his neck! If that’d been anyone else we’d be calling them a monster, but because its Krista we just let it slide and go on like she didn’t just end a dude’s career. DING DING DING Uno reads from his prayer book, attempting to summon a demon from the great beyond. But what he unearths is a thrust kick from Alexander that sends him toppling to the ground. COLE BRUTAL! Uno scrambles to his feet, and immediately searches out his lost book. Unfortunately for him he’s struck by another kick that deposits him into the corner. COLE BRUTAL! COACH This is going to be a long night! Uno attempts to call upon a voodoo spell that will make Alexander disappear and save him from further damaging kicks. Instead he earns the appearance of a wave of punches that bomb against his face. The attacks would sag Uno to the ground, were Alexander not holding him up so that he may savagely pummel him. COACH This guy is- COLE BRUTAL! Alexander grabs Uno by the neck and roughly situates him atop the turnbuckles. He then climbs to the top rope, where he resumes battering his opponent with heavy hands. After referee Earl Hebner calls for an end to the closed fists, ATB traps Uno inside a front facelock. Uno screams in abject fear! His horror is well earned as Alexander falls backwards and throws him to the canvas with a superplex! Uno’s hands find his back, and he grimaces in pain. COACH I think Uno may join Dos on the DL. COLE All because of this BRUTAL man! Alexander summons Uno to his feet. Once Uno rises, Alexander strides forward and plants another kick into his foe’s skull. Uno topples over to the canvas where his body writhes from the agony. ALEXANDER UP! Uno doesn’t move fast enough for Alexander’s taste, and the Greek superstar rips him from the mat. He hoists him onto his shoulders, and in one super fast motion throws him into the turnbuckle posts with a powerbomb! He then strides forward and slams the underside of his brown boot into Uno’s skull. “OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Uno is in a great deal of hurt, and rolls to the ring apron to escape his tormentor. But Alexander is relentless, and reaches over the ropes to grab Uno by the throat. With his foe screaming his fright, Alexander pulls him off the apron. He then slings him back into the ring with a chokebomb! Hebner counts the resulting pinfall… ONE! TWO! Alexander ends the pinfall, wanting to inflict further harm upon his foe. And inflict harm he does, grabbing Uno by legs and swinging him around until his head slams into the second posts. ALEXANDER RAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRRRRR! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COACH This guy is something else, Mikey. He’s gonna be a problem for a lot of superstars. Alexander begins pulling Uno from the canvas, only to be struck by a low blow. Uno then takes off to the ropes but as he comes back Alexander attempts to take him down with a crossface. Thankfully for the few Uno fans in attendance, Uno is able to roll through the hold. COLE A narrow escape for Uno! Uno roars back at Alexander with a lariat. But Alexander catches onto his arm and trips him to the canvas with a crossface! COLE Now he’s got it! Uno doesn’t even bother to struggle against the painful submission hold, rather he immediately taps out! DING DING DING BUFFER Your winner as a result of a submission with his first victory in the OAOAST….ALEXANDER THE BRUTAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL! Alexander has to be pried off Uno by the referee. This is a hazardous task made all the more dangerous by the fact that Alexander almost applies the crossface on Hebner! Luckily for the frightened referee, Alexander clams himself down and releases his grip. COACH This dude is in animal. He’s got no limits to his violence! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 “The World is Mine” by David Guetta hits to a chorus of boos, followed by the appearance of the LDC MONEYGANG, both of whom dressed like tourists in Hawaiian shirts. COLE What are they doing here? COACH They happen to be the One & Only World tag team champions. COLE I know that. But they weren’t scheduled to appear. COACH Obviously plans have changed. Like a magician, Reiger pulls a microphone out of his back pocket. REIGER We had to cut short our fun in the sun because it seems a few folks on the internets are calling shenanigans on our 100 second challenge. COACH The internet?!? Shit just got real in a hurry, Cole. REIGER Not only are they saying the challenge is too difficult, even though we proved that wasn‘t so, it’s also being suggested the drawing of opponents is rigged in our favor. COLE That is the concern. REIGER Uh, hello. Random drawing you morons. What, you people got something against bright young OAOVW talent getting a taste of the show? CMJ Bunch of racists. REIGER But just to show we aren’t ducking anybody, we had Lorelei go out on short notice to find us real competition. Let’s see who she found us. “Living in America” by James Brown cues and THE ALL-AMERICAN BOYS appear waving Old Glory. COACH Even you got to admit the All-American Boys are a step up from the LDC Moneygang’s opponents last week on HeldDOWN~! COLE You won’t find any better men out of the ring than the All-American Boys, but they haven’t won a match in ages. Referee Billy Silverman rushes to the ring and signals for the bell. * DINGDINGDING * Freedom is prepared to lockup when Reiger puts his hand up and points to his BLUETOOTH HEADSET. REIGER I’m being told somebody is attempting to light the American flag on fire backstage! ALL-AMERICAN BOYS The AABs race to the back as the LDCMG motion for the ref to count them out. COLE Don’t tell me they’re going to win it like this! COACH ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN!!! * DINGDINGDING * The LDCMG yuck it up inside as the official decision is announced. BUFFER The winners by count out and still your One & Only World tag team champions… COLIN MAGUIRE, JR. and SPENCER REIGER… THE LDC MMMOOOONNEYGANG!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE I can't believe they pulled a fast one on us again. You can bet there won't be any shenanigans when Baron Windels defends the World title against Mr. Dick later tonight.SOUTH BEACH SPECTACULAR WILL CONTINUE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 We see Theodore Moneymaker sitting in a timeless wood decorated living room. Clad in a red and black robe, he sits in a lounge chair next to a fireplace. On the table next to him is a picture of him with George W. MONEYMAKER Hello there, America. How are you? It’s a pleasure to have the company of your presence. I’m sure you’d feel the same way about myself, if it weren’t for the biased liberal media and their ruthless propaganda machine. These folks, these same folks that would supply arms to the Taliban if they could, they have branded me a “reckless dictator”. I have been labeled as no better than a self absorbed fool and no worse than a tyrant. With their cutting words and biting wit, they have turned an entire nation, the nation I love, against me. They have put me next to such historical monsters as Pol Pot and even Hitler himself. Ask yourselves did either of these men have an undying love for the moral and ethical fiber of America? Did they hold the spirit of America’s founding father’s in their hearts? No they did not. But I do, I will and I always have. Yet that makes me the enemey according to these socialist thought terroists. And you believe them! Like hungry puppy dogs you lap up the plate of filthy lies they put in front of your face. But, I don’t blame you, with their onslaught of evil words against me, the sheer mass crushes your free will and you have no choice but to buy into their lies. All I can do is hope to win you back to my side. But mere words aren’t enough to accomplish that goal! No, only actions may speak to my noble patriotism. And I ask you what’s more American than beautiful women? What’s more American than wrestling? What’s more American than competition? That’s why at Angleslam I bring to you the second ever Ejaculation Chamber for the OAOAST Women’s Title. Please stay tuned in the coming weeks for more.Master Blaster (Jammin') hits, and the crowd comes to its feet for Denzel Spencer, who meets Terry Taylor at the wheel. TAYLOR Ok, in our last match of this series, Denzel was able to get the best of TK in a steel cage, and in doing so, cut the deficit to 2-1! So, let's find out right now, what sort of match Denzel will compete in in attempt to even up the series! Denzel spins the wheel, and it goes around and around, before slowing down and coming to a stop. TAYLOR Wow, the wheel has stopped on Spinner's Choice! COLE That means Denzel gets to choose whatever kind of match he wants! COACH Dynamite drop-in, Michael! That broadcasting school has really paid off! TAYLOR Well, Denzel, what sort of match will you choose? DENZEL Be right back, mon. Denzel jogs backstage, then re-emerges moments later with a long leather strap. DENZEL Tonight we gonna have a Carribean strap match, mon! COLE A strap match! Denzel's choice thanks to the spin, and if it pays off, this series will be tied at 2! Denzel's music continues as he makes his way to the ring. BUFFERThe following contest is a strap match! The first man to touch all four corners of the ring, while pulling his opponent behind, will be the winner! Introducing first, from Montego Bay, Jamaica, weighing in at 227 pounds...DENZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLLL SSSSSSSSSSSSPENCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! Denzel slides inside and prepares himself as God of Thunder hits, and TK makes his way down the aisle. BUFFERHis opponent...from Green Bay, Wisconsin, weighing in at 250 pounds...representing the Deadly Alliance...he is the OAOAST Heartland champion...THHHHHHHHHHHHHHHUNDERKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID!!!!! TK climbs inside and removes the belt, before the referee sets up the strap. He then sets it up on Denzel, before TK attacks! *DING DING DING* COLE TK getting the early advantage with the attack before the bell! TK hammers Denzel in a corner, delivering European uppercuts, then scoops him up and slams him hard to the mat. He goes for an elbowdrop, but Denzel moves, then fires off with right hands. COLE Denzel avoiding the elbow, and now he fights back! Denzel shoots TK into the ropes, and catches him with a flying back elbow! Denzel plays to the crowd, which offers its support. He then picks up TK and slams him to the mat, and drives an elbow into his sternum. He goes to pick TK up, but TK strikes with a knee lift. TK then gathers up the strap, and lashes Denzel across the back! He does it twice more, then allows him to get to his feet, and lashes him across the chest! COLE Denzel being whipped like a dog here by TK, and now choked with that strap! TK chokes Denzel down in the corner with the strap, then whips him into the ropes. He puts his head down, however, and Denzel scores with a kick! Denzel delivers right hands, then takes TK down with a clothesline! TK rolls to the outside, and Denzel follows. COLE And now taking it to the floor! Denzel starts to choke TK with the strap, but TK fights back, kneeing Denzel in the gut, then hammering him on the back, before throwing him into the timekeepers' table. TK then grabs a chair and slams it across Denzel's back! COLE And these guys will use anything that's not bolted to the floor here in Miami! TK rolls Denzel back inside, then follows him into a corner, where Denzel kicks him in the gut, then delivers a big headbutt. He shoots TK into a corner, then catches him coming out with a spinning wheel kick! COLE So far Denzel has been able to withstand everything TK has thrown at him and get back on the offensive! Denzel drops down after a brief pause and slugs away at TK as the crowd counts along. 1!!! 2!!! 3!!! 4!!! 5!!! 6!!! 7!!! 8!!! 9!!! 10!!! Denzel then gathers up the strap, and touches a corner. COLE Denzel's going for the corners! Denzel touches a second corner, then goes for a third, but TK is able to get to his feet and clobber him from behind. TK picks up Denzel, and drops him with a back suplex, then drops a knee to the sternum, and goes to the corner. COLE And now it's TK for the corners! COACH And look, he's dragging Denzel around by the neck with that strap! As TK goes for the second corner, Denzel is able to kick him in the gut from the mat, forcing him down to the mat, but TK lands a kick to the face, knocking him back down. TK then gets to his feet and wraps the strap around Denzel's neck, then dumps him over the top rope! COLE And look at this, come on! COACH TK trying to hang Denzel! Denzel struggles, but manages to land a punch to the face of TK, and drops to the floor gasping for wind. TK rolls out to the floor, and wraps the strap around him once again, this time using it to sling Denzel into the ringpost! COLE And now Denzel sent into the steel post! TK rolls Denzel back inside, and touches a corner. COACH TK might get it this time, Denzel's taken quite a beating these last couple minutes! TK walks over and touches a second corner, then delivers a stomp to Denzel. He goes for a third, as Denzel tries to pull him away, but he manages to reach. COLE That's three corners! One more corner, and TK will have taken a commanding 3-1 lead in the series! However, Denzel springs up and flies at TK with a dropkick, knocking him back to the mat! COLE But Denzel with one last gasp, is able to stop the champion! Both men tangle on the mat, eventually rolling to the outside. TK tries to ram Denzel's face into the steps, but Denzel blocks, and TK tastes the steps! Denzel then slides inside, and back outside on another side of the ring. He plays to the crowd, then jerks the strap forward, causing TK to collide with the ringpost! COLE Oh, and TK right into the steel ringpost! Denzel rolls TK back inside, and springs in with a guillotine legdrop! He then touches a corner. COLE Denzel gonna try it again! Denzel touches a second corner, then stomps TK down to the mat, and touches a third! COLE One more corner for Denzel! Denzel struggles halfway to the last corner, but TK pulls himself up and hits him with a BICYCLE KICK~! COACH Yes! TK shoots Denzel into the ropes, and goes for a clothesline, but Denzel ducks, and the two clothesline each other! COLE And now both men down on the mat! Both men lay there for several seconds, then get to their feet. TK tries a right hand...but Denzel blocks, and delivers one of his own! Another try, same result! A third try, and Denzel comes back with a flurry of rights, but TK goes to the eyes. He whips Denzel into a corner, and charges, but Denzel gets his feet up! Denzel then climbs to the top rope, and hits TK with a missile dropkick! COLE Big dropkick from the top, and Denzel's cookin' now! Denzel then gathers the strap, and lashes TK across the back! COLE And now it's TK tasting the leather! Denzel picks TK up after a few more lashes, and kicks him in the gut, then goes for the SCISSOR KICK...but TK dodges and sticks his arm out, low-blowing Denzel! COLE A low blow from TK! TK touches a corner, then goes for a second...as Denzel touches the corner behind TK! COACH Oh, wait a minute, he's touching the corners too! TK touches a second corner, as does Denzel. COLE TK doesn't even know that Denzel also has two corners! TK touches a third corner, as does Denzel, who then spins TK around and begins a slugfest. TK wins, however, then kicks him in the gut and lifts him for the THUNDERBOLT DDT~!!!!!11111...but Denzel comes down and lifts TK up in the same motion, and drops him with the CARRIBEAN COMPACTOR~!!!!!11111 COLE Denzel hit his move! Now just touch the corner! Denzel rolls up to his feet, and touches the final corner! COLE There it is! Denzel Spencer has tied this series! BUFFERThe winner of the match...DENZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLL SSSSSSSSSSSSPENCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! COLE It's now 2 wins apeice, down to a best of 3 series! Denzel Spencer victorious here at the South Beach Spectacular! Denzel celebrates his win as we go to commercial. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 Taped this morning THE DECISION: AN OAOAST SPECIAL PRESENTATION The camera cuts to a dark room, with two shadowy figures sitting across from each other at a table. The lights then come on, to reveal Tony Tourettes sitting to the left in a bathrobe, across from Vinny Valentine in a robin's egg-colored sport suit. VINNY So Tony, what's new? TONY The fuck you talkin' about? You're my cousin! You're around me 24/7! How could you not know what's going on with me? Are you a FUCKING DUMB APE? VINNY OK, I guess you've got a point there. So, when did you make your decision? TONY As soon as I woke up! VINNY And do you have any doubts about your decision? TONY (ponders) ...no, I don't think so. VINNY Who all have you told about your decision? TONY I told YOUR MOM! Once I woke up, I rolled over and told her EXACTLY WHAT THE FUCK I WAS GONNA DO! VINNY You moron, you do realize that's also your aunt? TONY ...oh yeah. Oh, and I also told Waldo. WALDO That's WORLDWIDE Waldo, nigga! Me and T-squared been hard at work in this process! VINNY Who, in this process, have you taken advice from? WALDO We take advice from Mary Jane, nigga! LUTHER We hear dat! VINNY So, do you wanna sleep on this a little longer, or are you ready to make this decision? TONY I just got out of bed, YOU FAGMO! I think I've slept on it enough! VINNY OK then. Tony, the question everyone wants to know. What's your decision? TONY This morning...(sighs)...this is tough. This morning, I've decided to make Fruity Pebbles part of my balanced breakfast. The Burrough Boys erupt in cheers in the background, and exchange high-fives and chest bumps. VINNY Fruity Pebbles...that was the decision you woke up with this morning? TONY That was the decision I woke up with this morning. VINNY Why? TONY Cause they're FUCKIN' YABBA-DABBA DELICIOUS, THAT'S WHY! Plus, how many cereal spokesmen can also push Winston smokes? FRED FLINTSTONE WILL FUCK YOUR GIRLFRIEND! VINNY Well, you heard it here first, Tony's decided that Fruity Pebbles will be the centerpiece of his breakfast this morning. Until next time... Vinny snatches the cereal box and takes off! TONY VINNY? MY PEBBLES! Tony flips the table over, cereal bowl and all, and chases down Vinny. Various sound effects can be heard within the house as the camera pulls away. COLE Well, that was... something else. COACH And somewhere, the city of Cleveland mourns. COLE Wait, what did any of that have to do with Cleveland? They were talking about cereal. COACH Does Cleveland need a reason. They're Cleveland. They're mourning because they're Cleveland. COLE ...you've got a point. Let's go to the ring, Women's Title on the line next. *DINGDING* Already in the ring, Jade Rodez-Duncan goes through some last minute stretching and warming up, with little sister Maya by her side. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall and is for the OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP!! Introducing first, the challenger. Now residing in Los Angeles, California... accompanied to the ring by MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD! She is "THE PRODIGAL DAUGHTER" of the OAOAST... JJJAAAAAADDEEEE... RRROOOOODDEEEEZZZZZ - DDUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAANN!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE And Jade looking to become the Women's Champion once again, against the OAOAST's most anti-social female. NOW I'M THAT BITCH NOW I'M THAT BITCH NOW I'M THAT BITCH NOW I'M THAT BITCH Feel Good Drag takes over and brings out the OAOAST's own feel good dragger, the Women's Champion, Holly. Bitterness all over her face, Holly slowly walks to the ring, scowling at the Duncan girls all the way with her title flung over her shoulder. BUFFER And, the opponent. From Las Vegas, Nevada! Representing the only rock n' wrestling band that matters, The Heavenly Rockers! She is the reigning, defending, three-time OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION... "THE ANGEL OF DEATH"... HHHHOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COACH Damn, Holly looks mad. COLE I'm not sure I can blame her. Holly with a score to settle here tonight and some face to be saved, after being blasted in the face with that fire extinguisher a few weeks back on Syndicated at the Duncans' hands. And then, two weeks ago, Holly's team The Heavenly Rockers, losing to Jade and D*LUX in a six person tag. Holly hands over her title belt and continues to scowl at Maya, all the way out of the ring. *DINGDINGDING* "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" The fans are quick to back the popular challenger, which annoys Holly enough that she leaves the ring to debate them. And by debate, I mean yell and cuss. COLE Holly out making friends, I see. After emasculating one fan in particular and leaving him hanging his head in shame, Holly climbs back into the ring. But she's met by Jade, who is tired of waiting and hits Holly with a shoulder to the gut through the ropes. Jade then grabs the top rope and brings the Women's Champion in the hard way! Grabbing her BUTT, Holly scurries to her feet and throws a right hand. Jade blocks and responds with a forearm shot. And a second. And a third. Jade then whips Holly to the ropes and knocks her down with a back elbow. COLE Big shot to the chest! That might take some of that hot air out of those lungs. Jade waits for Holly to get back up and charges in with a clothesline, knocking Holly through the ropes and to the outside! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" The challenger gets the crowd going as on the floor, Holly cusses out anyone with earshot again. COLE Or, maybe not. But Holly off to a bad start here tonight in this Women's Championship match, the former champion Jade Rodez-Duncan, fiery and energetic. And Holly would be best served paying attention to the action in the ring instead of the crowd. COACH She's just letting off a little steam, that's all. All part of Holly's strategy. COLE Is there ever a moment when Holly isn't "letting off steam"? Holly stomps back into the ring, stopping to glare at Maya, who razzes her tongue at the Women's Champion. Back inside, the wily Holly tries to slow things down... simply to lure Jade into a false sense of security, before booting her in the gut. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Holly hammers away on Jade, before turning around around and giving a very blatant "up yours" gesture to Maya. COLE Hey, come on, that's uncalled for. COACH Like she's never seen anyone do that before. That's Krista's daughter. Scoop and a slam plants Jade in the middle of the ring, Holly setting her up for a big elbow... but finds nobody home! As Holly shakes out her arm Jade comes up from behind and spins Holly around into an armdrag. Right back up, Holly is caught with a second armdrag. And reeling, she walks into a third armdrag. Holly decides she's had enough of this and goes to roll out of the ring again. But before her feet can touch the floor she gets a shove back inside from Maya!! "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COACH HEY! HOLLY YOU STUPID (beep), GET YOUR (beep) HANDS OFF OF ME!! As Holly rages at a nonchalant Maya, Jade sneaks up and schoolgirls her to the mat! 1... 2... NO! Holly scrambles back up but is pulled back down with another armdrag, Jade hanging on and barring the arm of a very angry Holly. COACH What was that, Michael!? That was blatant outside interference! COLE Well, Maya was just doing the fans a favour. She just saved about a dozen people from being sworn at. Picking herself up, Holly escapes the armbar by kneeing Jade in the abdomen. With two handfuls of hair, Holly then hurls Jade to the mat face first. COACH Well now they just made Holly mad... I mean, madder. With half an eye, an evil eye, on Maya, Holly drags Jade back up. Measuring her for it, Holly then pops Jade right in the face with a closed fist. Jade goes down clutching her nose and the referee gives Holly a stern warning. MAYA (emotionless) Oh no. Not her face. How terrible. Not concerned with the warning, Holly follows up by kicking Jade in the face and going for a cover... 1... 2... No! Throwing Jade aside, Holly turns and hurls some more abuse at Maya. The champ then goes after Jade, but right near the ropes, allowing her to be backdropped over the top and to the outside! COLE Again, Holly not paying enough attention to the match and focusing on the fans and on Maya. COACH Can you blame her? The girl's a pest! She's got no business out here. Holly picks herself up by the apron but takes a kick to the head for her troubles. Jade then goes to step out of the ring after Holly, but The Angel Of Death snatches hold of Jade's sneaker and yanks her off the apron, causing Jade to SMACK her face against the edge!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Ooh! That did not sound good. A little more pleased with life now, Holly slides back inside and lets the referee count. Maya comes around to check on her half sister while Holly decides to vent at the crowd on the other side. COACH Looks like Holly might have just put out Jade's fire! HAHA! COLE Referring of course to Syndicated, when Jade sprayed Holly with that fire exti... COACH Everyone knows what I'm referring to, numbnuts. Don't have to remind us all. We ain't got the memories of goldfish. COLE Actually, scientists discovered that a goldfish's memory is a lot longer than they originally thou... COACH Do you have an off-switch? With a little help from Maya, Jade is able to roll back into the ring. And right into a barrage of stomps from Holly and her heavy combat boots. The referee moves Holly back and gives Jade a chance to get back up, but Holly moves right back in with some more heavy kicks. "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" Holly picks Jade up and whips her to the ropes, catching her on the way back with a hooking clothesline. Holly then gives the fans the "up yours", before making a cover... 1... 2... No! By the hair, Holly starts to slam the back of Jade's head repeatedly against the canvas, forcing the referee to intervene again. Breaking it up, Holly grabs hold of Jade's wrists. Lifting her off the mat Holly then places her foot on Jade's chest and gives her a Reverse Curbstomp, bouncing the head back violently one more time!! COACH That's it, it's over. As boos rain down on Holly, the Women's Champion soaks it up for a while before electing to cover... 1... 2... Kickout! HOLLY Oh come the (beep) on! Holly gives the referee a hard time, complaing about the count. COLE Jade is a mild-mannered girl but we've seen before, she's tough, she's got a lot of heart. Picking her back up, Holly throws Jade face-first into the turnbuckles. A few stomps to the midsection soften Jade up, before the Women's Champion takes a run-up and charges in with a knee. Holly turns her attentions back to Maya, directing a few words at her before she runs in again and buries another knee. Smile on her face, The Angel Of Death decides to rub it in Maya's face some more. Leaving Maya in the troubling position of having to publicly cheer on her half-sibling. Em-barr-ass-iiing! Holly makes sure to dedicate to Maya the next shot, which looks to be another knee... until Jade kicks up a foot and catches Holly running in with a kick! Kicking up on the turnbuckles again, Jade wraps her legs around the dazed Holly's shoulders. As she goes for the Victory Roll though, Holly manages to keep her balance and counters by falling backwards with an Electric Chair!! COACH Great move! Howd'ya like that, Maya? Cover by Holly... 1... 2... Kickout! MAYA Yay! Suck it, Coach! COACH Holly looks to finish Jade off and sets her up, ready to dish out some Percussion! As she holds Jade in position though, Holly takes the time to seek out Maya. Giving Jade time to recover and catch Holly with a Flapjack! "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" Both champion and challenger stay down and take time to recover, during which time, Maya starts to cheerlead for her sister. COACH ...little pest. Both Holly and Jade get back up at the same time, with Holly ready to strike. But Jade manages to block and fire back with a forearm. Jade catches Holly with another forearm. And another, starting to fight back. Holly cuts her off with a boot though. Irish whip is reversed however, sending Holly into the corner and setting her up for a double knee attack against the turnbuckles. COLE Jade is starting to get some momentum here! And we all know how hard Duncan's are to stop when they've got that momentum on their side. As Holly staggers out of the corner, Jade leaves her feet, with a Front Dropkick to the chest! Cover... 1... 2... No! Waving the referee aside, politely, Jade heads to the middle rope. COLE Jade going to take a risk here. COACH Don't think Maya thinks much of this idea. Maybe she saw the 'elevation' on that dropkick. Jade waits for Holly to turn around before leaving her perch, looking to catch her with a flying Thesz press. Holly catches Jade out of the corner of her eye though and counters with a SPINEBUSTER!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And the high-risk did not pay off! Maya just shakes her head sadly and with a little embarrassment. Meanwhile, Holly takes a walk around. Maya and Holly get into another spat... which turns into a SPIT, as the Women's Champion sends some phlegm the youngster's way!! MAYA "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COACH COLE That's just despicable! Despicable! Poor little Maya is left to clean off her shoulder, as Holly goes back on the attack. And she calls for the finish. Hooking on a front facelock, Holly looks for Percussion one more time... but Jade shoves her off... RIGHT INTO THE REFEREE!! COLE Down goes the ref! COACH Oh great. Holly doesn't seem too concerned and starts to shout and swear at the downed ref for getting in the way. She then turns around, catching Jade with a boot and a Percussion DDT! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Nailed it that time! But there's no referee. Still unconcerned by this, Holly gives the referee a kick to check that he's unconscious. Once she's sussed that out, Holly then gets an idea. She stares down at Maya for a second, before climbing out of the ring, yelling at camera men to get the (beep) out of her way. Holly drops down and hunts under the ring, before emerging with... a FIRE EXTINGUISHER!! COACH Oh yeah! Payback time! Holly slides back in with the fire extinguisher and pulls the pin, ready to give Jade a dousing. She aims the nozzle right at the recovering challenger's prone rear-end and makes some unkind remarks, as usual, before preparing for blast-off... ...BUT MAYA ENTERS THE RING AND LEAPS ON HOLLY'S BACK!!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" *DINGDINGDING* The recovering referee calls for the bell and the disqualification as Holly flails around, trying to get Maya off of her back, the Duncan girl with a death grip around the Women's Champion's neck! COACH Get her out of the ring! COLE Those fighting Duncan genes have kicked in and Maya is trying to strangle the life out of Holly! Eventually Holly manages to shrug Maya off and grabs her, throwing her over her head onto the canvas. COLE Uh oh. Maya, get out of there young lady. As Maya grabs her back from the fall, Holly is STEAMING mad. She snatches the fire extinguisher up off the mat and decides to turn her attentions and the extinguisher towards the youngest Duncan daughter instead. COLE There's no need for this... COACH Sure there is! Kids need to be taught about fire safety! Holly stands over Maya with the fire extinguisher, with a snarling smile on her face. HOLLY You just made a BIG (beep)ing mistake, you stupid little (beep)!! MAYA Uh... okay... that's cool 'n all, but... HOLLY Shut your (beep) little (beep) mouth! MAYA But, uhm... you... ya really oughta... HOLLY What? I really oughta WHAT? MAYA ...turn around. HOLLY Oh, really? Do you really (beep)in' think I'm that (beep)in' stupid, that I'm gonna (beep)in' fall for that (beep)in' (beep) (beep) trick, huh? MAYA No. I guess not. I guess my childhood naivety took over. Please ignore me. HOLLY ...fine, what the (beep) ever. Now shut the hell up and eat foam! Holly goes to spray the extinguisher... but gets spun around! Face to face with Jade, Holly freezes, as Jade tilts the nozzle up... AND MAYA HITS THE SPRAY, BLASTING HOLLY RIGHT IN THE FACE!!!! COACH AAAAHHHHHH!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Holly takes a big dive and blinded with foam, starts to crawl out of the ring. And Jade gives her a helpful blast, firing the extinguisher right into Holly's backside, sending her tumbling through the ropes and to the floor!! The embarrassed Women's Champion scrambles away, face and buttocks bitten by cold, which makes for a comical exit for the Miami crowd. In the ring, Jade and Maya celebrate with a hug, that is until Maya realises what's happening and screeches "Ew! What the HELL do you think you're doing!?" COLE AHAHAHA! Holly getting a FROSTY reception from the Duncan girls here at the South Beach Spectacular! AHAHAHA! COACH I hate your laugh. And I hate the Duncan family! They just embarrassed the Women's Champion again, do these girls have no soul!? COLE Lighten up, Coach! They're just having fun. Infact, they're having a BLAST! AHAHAHAHAHA! COACH ...I will cut you. Despite being on the end of a disqualification loss, Jade celebrates. And of course, end up being over-shadowed by Maya. But that's okay because it's all smiles for the Duncans either way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 COLE We are back live and it’s now time for the first of our double main event this evening! “Motherfucker of the Year” by Motley Crue cues and Mr. Dick is showered onstage by golden pyro. COACH Right away we’re thrown a curveball, Cole. Rarely does Mr. Dick come alone. COLE And that worries me. MD is in no mood for theatrics tonight. He tosses his entrance attire aside and loosens up in the ring as “Not Afraid” by Eminem hits. COLE Listen to this ovation for the reigning World Champion! BW marches ringside alongside fellow Citizen Soldier Tim Cash. COACH Look at Baron Windels, Cole. Unlike Mr. Dick, he didn’t have the guts to show alone. Something Mr. Dick is quick to inform BW about. Citizen Soldiers converse and it’s decided Cash will return backstage. COLE Are you happy now? COACH I just want a fair fight. * DING * DING * DING * DING * BUFFER This is your main event of the evening! A winner take all I QUIT match for the HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE WORLD! Are you ready? “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” BUFFER South Beach… ARE… YOU… READY? COLE We’re all ready! BUFFER Then for the thousands in attendance and the millions watching around the world… Ladies and gentlemen… LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLET'S GET READY TO RRRRRRRRRRRUMMMMMMBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BUFFER Introducing first, from San Antonio, Texas, weighing 238 pounds, the former undisputed heavyweight champion of the world… MMMIIIIIIIIIIISSSSTTEEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" BUFFER His opponent also hails from San Antonio, Texas, and is one-half of the Citizen Soldiers tag team, here is the reigning and defending OAOAST HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD… “THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGER” BBAAAAARRRRROOOOOOOOOONN WINDELS!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BW hands the title over for perhaps the last time and watches as senior official Earl Hebner displays the championship overhead. * DINGDINGDING * MD and BW come face to face mid-ring. After some words are exchanged MD pokes BW in the chest, then motions to the crowd and gives himself an air hand job. COLE What disrespect being shown to the OAOAST Champion. BW responds with multiple right hands, then whips MD into the ropes for a BIG BOOT… but MD ducks and unloads with a FACIAL~! COACH That caught Baron Windels square between the eyes, Cole. If I’m Mr. Dick I go straight for the Roughrider in hopes of catching BW off-guard. And that’s exactly what MD does. BW resists and delivers a COWBOY BEBOP ELBOW while on his back to free his leg from MD‘s grip. MD staggers to a corner where BW mounts him for a series of punches. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN!!! MD crumbles to his knees and then is rolled onto his back as BW looks to apply the STF. COLE Oh, my! BW is going for Mr. Dick’s own Roughrider submission! MD is quick to escape though, thumbing BW in the eye and then delivers a CHOP BLOCK. COACH Mr. Dick is starting to set BW up for the Roughrider, Cole. MD stomps on BW’s leg repeatedly, then BASHES it against the RINGPOST. Again. And again. BW slides away but MD stays on the attack, draping the leg on the bottom rope and crashing his weight down ala Ric Flair. He goes to the well one too many times though, and is sent tumbling over the top to the floor! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BW struggles to his feet as MD soars off the top… and eats a big right! COLE The Lone Star Gunslinger with a facial of his own. COACH That sounds so dirty coming out of your mouth. Russian leg sweep buys BW a breather. Meanwhile, TIM CASH views the action backstage on a monitor when he’s suddenly approached by Krista’s mom, GENEVIEVE DUNCAN, with food and drinks. COACH Ms. D’s too cool to hang around the likes of Tim Cash. GENEVIEVE (to camera) Hush Jonathan! COACH Yes, ma’am. Back ringside BW whips MD in for THE SLEEPER, but MD counters with a KNEEBREAKER into THE STF! COLE Roughrider! COACH We’re gonna have a new champion, Cole. I can feel it. “BARON!” “BARON!” “BARON!” The crowd rallies behind BW as he refuses to submit, even with MD slamming down on top. MR. DICK Say it! Say it!! BARON NO!!! MD breaks the hold in frustration and slaps BW upside the head. He then reaches into his boot and pulls out HANDCUFFS, which he loses control of after a big right hand. MD receives the worse end of an exchange with BW until a knee to the gut puts him back in the driver’s seat, albeit momentarily as BW reverses a whip and connects with a BIG BOOT. He then CUFFS MD and applies THE SLEEPER!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COLE Your boy has nowhere to go, Coach. COACH Don’t fight it, Dick. You can’t say I quit if you’re passed out. Right in MD’s face is referee Earl Hebner who repeatedly asks MD if he wants to quit. Of course the answer is no. MALAYSIA (off-screen) Hey Baron! Baron! Up on the AngleTron we find MALAYSIA in a dark room backstage wearing an S&M MASK. MALAYSIA I’d release that sleeper if I were you. BW shakes his head no, then really cranks on the sleeper. MALAYSIA Maybe this will change your mind. The camera pans out to reveal TIM CASH bent over a table blindfolded and gagged! BARON COLE Oh, my. Malaysia leans over and yanks Cash’s head back violently. COACH Hey! Malaysia’s choking the chicken just like Mr. Dick said! MALAYSIA Now, are you going to release that hold or am I going to have to give your little friend here a special colon exam on live TV? BW immediately releases the sleeper. MALAYSIA Oh, we’re not done yet. That was just foreplay. The real fun is about to begin, unless you do one tiny thing. I’ll give you a hint: it’s 2 words, 5 letters. COLE She doesn’t mean…? COACH I think she does. BARON Screw you, you crazy bitch! Malaysia laughs, then pulls out a DILDO! MALAYSIA Only person who will get screwed here is your friend. So I’ll give you another chance. COACH Malaysia’s got a hostage. It’s Tim Cash. *laughs* BARON Alright, alright. I quit. HEBNER BARON I said I quit! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winner and NEW heavyweight champion of the world… MMMIIIIIIIIIIISSSSTTEEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Damn him and Malaysia! Still cuffed, a groggy MD has the ref place the title around his neck before fleeing backstage. BARON There. I said it. Now let Tim go. Malaysia nods, then SHOVES THE DILDO…. No, just playing. The camera pulls back in time to show her dropping the foreign object on the floor. BARON COLE After his traumatic ordeal will Tim Cash have anything left to compete later tonight in Battlebowl?!? Backstage, Reject converses with Melissa. REJECT To be fair, babe, she almost cost us the match last week. MELISSA I know, but this means more than the match! Me and Morgan haven't always gotten along, but she's still my sister, and it's tough watching Leon treat her that way. I know this means a lot to you, but this is family! REJECT I guess you have a point. Leon's pullin' some bitch shit. The R-Man has more respect for his women than that! Reject puts his arm around Melissa, as Sandman walks into the room. Sandman is wearing a LeBron Heat jersey. REJECT Oh, look at you, frontrunner! Typical Miami, always jumpin' on them bandwagons! *crowd boos* REJECT Where's TK? SANDMAN Still outside destructing arena property. REJECT That's OK, we'll avenge him tonight. The Deadly Alliance is gonna dominate Battlebowl, and everyone else is gonna leave Miami with no ring...just like Dan Marino. *crowd boos* REJECT It's about that time! Reject and Sandman fist-bump as the camera cuts away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 La Roux’s calls Sophie out from the back. Dressed in a black workout pants and a white top with her name scrawled across the back, Sophie kicks up sand at the cameraman before heading to the ring. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of twenty minutes! Now making her way to the ring from Marseilles, France, SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE! COLE Sophie has to be looking forward to getting revenge on Morgan here in Miami. COACH Wanna bet? COLE On whether she’s looking forward to getting revenge or not? COACH I have a gambling problem. ::Cue:: GO! To un-explain the unforgivable, Drain all the blood and give the kids a show. By streetlight this dark night, A séance down below. There are things that I have done, You never should ever know! And without you is how I disappear, And live my life alone forever now. And without you is how I disappear, And live my life alone forever now. Thunderous bolts of electricity pound the entrance stage, as the audience comes to their feet. The video screens across the arena fill with images of flashing beams of electricity. A final electrcital bolt punctures through the dark blue light on the entrance stage, and hearlds the arrival of Morgan Nerdly! Morgan looks cute in a pinstriped booty shorted romper, however, her expression is one of hatred for an opponent that stares at her from the ring. COLE And her opponent, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, perepare for shock and awe from MORGGAAAAAAANNN NNNNNEEEEEERRRRRRRDDDDDDDDDLLLLLLLYYYY! Morgan nervously inches down the entry way, her eyes glancing at the audience who eagerly root for her to lay a beating on Sophie.Can you hear me cry out to you? Words I thought I'd choke on figure out. I'm really not so with you anymore. I'm just a ghost, So I can't hurt you anymore, So I can't hurt you anymore. And now, you wanna see how far down I can sink? Let me go, fuck! So, you can, well now so, you can I'm so far away from you. Well now so, you can. Morgan gets into the ring and stands on the first rope, while leaning over the second. She casts a quizzical glance at the audience, almost childlike in its odd innocence. DING DING DING The contest begins with a lockup. The two gorgeous ladies tussle back and forth, neither able gain the upperhand on the other. Eventually Sophie grows frustrated and shoves Morgan away. She curses the Nerdly girl en Francais, which causes Morgan to shy away. But Sophie is unrelenting and slaps her in the face. COLE Come on! Another slap follows, causing the audience to douse Sophie with jeers. Jeers soon turn to cheer as the encourage Morgan to fight back. With their approval, Morgan begins firing of super fast jabs at her foe. But Sophie returns fire, and a fierce slugfest ensues. Overpowered by the larger woman, Morgan quickly switches to leg kicks. Sophie follows suit and her black boots leave red welts on Morgan’s bare legs. With Morgan hobbled, Sophie throws a kick at the tiny girl’s midsection. But Morgan catches onto her boot. She then steps over Sophie’s leg and throws a wheel kick that floors the French Girl! COLE Sophie has changed so much since Josie left the OAOAST. She’s left behind her friends, developed this new attitude, and it’s a shame that this is what she’s become. Morgan shows off her agility by leaping onto the top rope. Unfortunately for her, Sophie is up with incredible speed. She runs to the corner, and attempts to capture Morgan onto her narrow shoulders. COLE What could Sophie have in mind here? Whatever it is, Morgan wants no part of it, as the little girl slams punch after punch into Sophie’s head. This annoys Sophie and she responds with knife edge chops to the exposed parts of Morgan’s chest. COLE That could tear through flesh! COACH Hoefully it’ll tear through her clothes, so I can see some titaaaaaayssssss! Morgan is weakened atop the turnbuckle, wincing and breathing heavy. As such she can’t defend herself from being pushed off the posts to the outside. She crash lands with tremendous force, bringing immediate worry to the hearts of the fans. COLE This vicious streak of Sophie’s is brand new, and Morgan is feeling it here at the South Beach Spectacular! Stroking her pixie like hair, Sophie exits the ring to retirve Morgan. She stans the Nerdly girl up against the guardrail and reddens her chest with a stiff series of chops. As Morgan whimpers in pain, Sophie grabs onto the seat of her booty shorted romper and dumps her back into the ring. Sophie attempts to follow her inside to cause more damage. But as she’s on the ring apron, Morgan comes to life with a rolling wheel kick that throws her back to the ground. COLE Those platform heels connecting with Sophie’s skull. COACH Morgan’s wearing platform heels and she’s still that small. Without them she’s probably the size of my penis. Morgan runs the ropes, preparing to dive over them to splash Sophie. But Sophie rolls into the ring, forcing Morgan to make a quick baseball slide to the outside. Unfortunately her good defense ends at that moment; Sophie comes sailing through the ropes to shoulder tackle the Edmonton native! COLE Amazing athleticism! COACH Its a party here in South Beach, but it ain’t no party for Morgan. Sophie grabs Morgan by the back of her pinstriped romper and roughly throws her back into the ring. The lithe French Girl then follows her back inside and attempts a cover… ONE! TWO! Morgan makes a crucial kickout! This frustrates Sophie, and she slams her fists against the canvas in response. SOPHIE Son fini! After that proclamation, Sophie snapmares Morgan to the canvas. She then kicks her in the small of the back, causing screams to pour out Morgan’s mouth. The pain continues to grow as Sophie aims another kick at her face. But Morgan catches onto her leg and drags her down for a pinfall…. ONE! TWO! Sophie launches her shoulder from the canvas. She brings herself to her feet, only to be taken off them by a dropkick from Morgan! The tiny Nerdly girl is doubled over, bone weary and still hurt from Sophie’s previous high flying attack. COACH When she’s doubled over like that, you’ve got a great view of a camel toe. A great view. COLE Will you focus? Sophie pulls herself up by the ropes, and sags against the corner posts. Problematically, any efforts to catch her breath are halted by Morgan ramming her shoulder into her thin midsection. Sophie then sinks to the canvas, clutching a now sore stomach. This gives Morgan the opportunity to attempt a high impact strike. She backs across the ring, and then strides forward to plant the bottom of her platform heel into Sophie’s face. Sophie falls over, tangling herself between the second and bottom rope. This is pleasing to Morgan, who slingshots herself over the ropes and drives a leg into Sophie’s neck. “MORGAN! MORGAN! MORGAN!” the fans sing as Morgan nervously paces around ringside. After moments of frantic indecesion, Morgan hurriedly returns to the ring to pin her foe… ONE! TWO! Kickout! Sophie returns to her feet under her own willpower, and trades blows with Morgan. The fans root on Morgan, and she pleases them by gaining the upperhand. With Sophie staggered, the smallest of the Nerdly kids runs the ropes. But as he returns Sophie flips her overhead with a hurricanrana into a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Morgan rolls out the surprise pinfall. Again Sophie is displeased and glares at the referee through strands of her pixie haircut. COLE It’s a very festive atmosphere in the stands, but in the ring its all business between these two former women’s champions. Using the blond locks of Morgan as a handle, Sophie snapmares her over. She then affixes Morgan inside a rear chinlock. The refere immediately checks for a submission, but Morgan waves him off. SOPHIE Soumettez! MORGAN No! Morgan continues to fight against the hold, even as Sophie tightens her grip. COACH Keep at it, Sophie. Her kind always gives up. They don’t have the mental strength that we do. COLE How can you say that? Morgan’s cherub like cheeks burn with pain, as Sophie wrenches her hands across them. She tries to break the hold, but her little arms can’t manage much in the way of achievement. “MORGAN! MORGAN! MORGAN!” Morgan finds a small victory as she’s able to slowly come to her feet. Now upright she can pump elbows Sophie’s thin stomach. The series of elbows work like magic, and shatter the hold. Morgan immediately goes on the attack, striking Sophie with a pair of kicks to the ribs. She then slams her platform heel into her face with a round house! COLE Lightening Kick! Morgan chews on her hair, nervous and afraid of a sudden sneak attack. When she realizes her paranoia is just that, she heads to the ropes. But as he bounces back, Sophie slams a dropkick into her jaw! COLE Sophie may have just crashed this beach party! Sophie falls atop her opponent’s little body for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! The Most Electrifying Woman in sports entertainment makes a stunning kickout! COACH I thought Morgan was knocked out! COLE Don’t underestimate the Tiny Terror of Edmonton. Morgan rolls to the corner, looking to use the posts to aid her in her rise. But that task is taken care of by Sophie who yanks her up by hair straight hair. Sophie backs her against the posts, and smashes her exposed chest with a vile chop. Sophie then whips Morgan across the ring, following close behind. However she misses her mark, when Morgan wards her away with a back elbow. Stumbling backwards, Sophie is caught off guard by second rope cross body block from the cute Canadian. The referee counts the resulting cover… ONE! TWO! A near fall as Sophie escapes the pin. She gets onto her knees, taking deep and labored breaths. As she does this Morgan runs the ropes. When she returns to Sophie she slides across the canvas and nails her with a lariat! COLE Shades of Leon Rodez! COACH Call that move the Electric Slide. Morgan hooks onto Sophie’s outside leg for the cover… ONE! TWO! Only a two count as Sophie powers out the pin. While Sophie attempts to collect her bearings, her foe leaps onto the turnbuckles. She hunches over, awaiting Sophie’s rise. COACH Bam! There’s that camel toe again! When Sophie rises Morgan flies off the posts with a beautiful missile dropkick! Sophie is flung to the canvas, where she’s pinned by her foe.. ONE! TWO! Sophie makes another pinfall escape! COLE What a great battle we’re seeing in the new home of Lebron James, Miami, Florida. COACH What great camel toe I saw! If they make ‘em all like that in Edmonton, Lebron shoulda switched sports and signed with the Oilers. Morgan attemps to irish whip Sophie. But the French Girl reverses the hold and lacerates Morgan with a diving short arm lariat! With both ladies seemingly down and incapacitated, the official has no choice but to begin a count… ONE! TWO! THREE! Sophie begins to rise, and glares at the referee for daring to count her out. She stalks her way to the corner, daring a now moving Morgan to challenge her. Morgan takes this dare and darts her. Sophie smiles at this taking of the bait, and floors her with a leaping sidekick! Moving swiftly, she grabs Morgan by the side of the head and stashes her inside a front facelock. From there she falls backwards and nails a DDT! The referee drops into position to count the ensuing cover… ONE! TWO! Morgan succeeds in kicking out! However her troubles continue as Sophie grabs onto her exposed legs and turns her over into a Boston crab! The littlest Nerdly hollers out her agony, as pain shoots through her back. SOPHIE Do not be zhe fool! Give up! Morgan does not follow Sophie’s rudely stated advice. Instead he furiously crawls her way to the ropes. Despite the misery she finds herself under, Morgan still manages to latch onto the bottom rope! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Frustrated and annoyed, Sophie stomps away from Morgan. She engages herself in an argument with the referee, giving Morgan some time to make a much needed recovery. She attempts to sneak up on her taller foe. However, Sophie is wise to her arrival and turns around to terrorize her with right hooks. Thinking Morgan dazed by the parade of punches, Sophie attempts to body slam her. But Morgan finds her way out the hold! She then captures Sophie onto her shoulders in a standing firman’s carry! COLE Here it comes! Here comes Shock & Awe! But Cole and the roaring audience have spoken too soon as Sophie slithers down Morgan’s back. She then leaps upwards and drags Morgan back to the canvas with a rear naked choke! COLE A choke! COACH That is something you don’t see in an OAOAST women’s match very often. You know what you do see? Some fine ass titaaaaaaaaayyyyyyysssssss! Morgan frantically and furiously fights to be free of the chokehold. She manages to get to a sitting position, but still Sophie traps her inside the chokehold. COLE Is Morgan going to tap? Will she give up? Morgan succeeds in fighting to her feet, but the hold remains. The fans implore her to keep fighting, and Morgan agrees to their request solely out of instinct. COLE Will this be all she wrote for Morgan here in Miami? Not quite as Morgan somehow finds a way to maneuver Sophie onto her shoulders. The hold is broken, and much too the audience’s delight Sophie is being prepared to be flung sideways by the Shock & Awe! But Sophie slithers down Morgan’s back, and rolls her up into a pinfall! ONE! MORGAN’S BOOTY SHORTS ARE HOOKED! TWO! THREE! DING DING DING BUFFER Your winner as a result of a pinfall…SOOOOPPPPPHIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE! Not wishing to inflame a lion’s rage, Sophie quickly dives out the ring. Now located in the safety of the outside area, she raises her arm and smiles in triumph. COLE Sophie stole one! Morgan shakes her head with a deep sadness. She can’t even bring herself to look up and face the crowd after such a crushing loss.NEXT BATTLEBOWL!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 3, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 3, 2013 *DING DING DING* (slow and dramatic) BUFFERLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLadies and gentlemen...this is our main event of the evening here at the South Beach Spectacular! *crowd cheers* BUFFERTonight, 16 of the top contenders in the world do battle in an over-the-top rope battle royal! The prize...a trip to AngleSlam, for a shot, at the Heavyweight championship of the WORLD! This is the finals of Battlebowl, 2010! *crowd cheers* BUFFERAnd now, let's introduce the 16 participants! The Miami Vice theme song plays, as Tha Puerto Rican comes through the curtains to massive cheers. He is followed by Theodore Moneymaker, Spencer Reiger, Sandman9000, Nathaniel Black, James Blonde, Ned Blanchard, Biff Atlas, Vinny Valentine, Christian Wright, Reject, Leon Rodez, Tim Cash, Victor Perez, King Landon Maddix, and finally Krista Isadora Duncan as Buffer goes through the names. (yeah like i was gonna type all those out in buffer speak, lol) BUFFERLadies and gentlemen, your Battlebowl 2010 finalists. ARE YOU READY? *crowd cheers* BUFFERMiami, Florida, ARRRRRRRRE YYYYYYOUUUU RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREADYYYYYYYY??? *crowd cheers* BUFFERThen for the thousands in attendance here in Miami, and the millions and millions watching around the world...there's only one thing left to say. Ladies and gentlemen...LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLET'S GET RRRRRRREADY TO RRRRRRRUMMMMMMBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLE EEEE!!!!! *DING DING DING* COLE And Battlebowl is underway! Reject and Sandman double up on PRL, while Tim Cash goes at it with Spencer Reiger. Perez helps out PRL, while Leon picks his spots. Ned comes after him as Vinny and Biff do battle. COLE Former tag team partners, Biff Atlas and Vinny Valentine, going at it! Meanwhile, Krista stands on Landon's throat in the corner. COACH And these two were partners just a couple weeks ago in the Battlebowl qualifier! The camera cuts to catch Biff trying to dump Reiger over the top, only to have Vinny dump him over and to the floor! COLE And there's our first elimination! Biff Atlas is gone! COACH And you can bet Vinny enjoyed that one! Vinny taunts Biff from the ring, but that only leaves him open for Ned to toss him out, as well! COLE And Vinny took his eye off the ball! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Biff Atlas eliminated by: Vinny Valentine eliminated: Vinny Valentine eliminated by: Ned Blanchard ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Spencer and Ned then tangle on the mat, while Wright saves Teddy from an elimination attempt by Perez. The duo hammers away on Perez, as Leon stomps away at Cash. Meanwhile, Reject tries to eliminate Krista! COLE And Krista in trouble at the hands of Reject! However, Krista manages to free herself via a rake of the eyes. Sandman works over Black, as Blonde sneaks in assorted cheap shots, while Wright and Teddy finish their assault of Perez and pitch him to the floor! COLE And Victor Perez sent to the outside! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Victor Perez eliminated by: Theodore Moneymaker & Christian Wright ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE Gotta give the young man credit, for a newcomer like him to advance to the finals of Battlebowl, it says a lot about the talent of Victor Perez! Blonde goes after Tim Cash, while Spencer tries to convince Sandman to hold Black in place for him. Sandman looks on unimpressed, then stalks him into a corner, where Reject hits him with a right hand! COLE And Spencer Reiger in big trouble now! Sandman kicks Spencer in the gut, and Reject holds him up, as Spencer protests, and delivers a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! And another! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Ned rakes Reject's eyes from behind, while Sandman attempts to dump Spencer, but is hit from behind by Wright. Spencer slides back to the mat, still favoring his chest, and goes after Krista. He delivers a few shots, then backs up and charges, but Krista tosses him to the floor with his momentum! COLE Spencer eliminated by Krista! Another measure of revenge after COD lost the tag team titles to the Moneygang! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Spencer Reiger eliminated by: Krista Isadora Duncan ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ned gets the same treatment from Landon, as he attempts to slam him over the top, but Landon hangs on and negotiates him to the floor! COLE Ned Blanchard out as well! COACH Courtesy of the King! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Ned Blanchard eliminated by: King Landon Maddix ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Landon and Blonde then begin to assault Black, as Sandman works over Cash and Leon and PRL do battle. Landon and Blonde hit a double suplex, then Landon positions himself by the ropes, motioning for Blonde to whip Black in that direction. He attempts to, but Black reverses the whip, and Landon backdrops Blonde over the top! COACH Oh no! COLE Landon eliminated James Blonde! Landon is distracted long enough for Black to meet him with a clothesline which sends him to the outside as he turns around! COACH I can't believe this! COLE The Kingdom has crumbled here at Battlebowl! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: James Blonde eliminated by: King Landon Maddix eliminated: King Landon Maddix eliminated by: Nathaniel Black ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Black goes after Reject, as Sandman attempts to dump PRL to the floor, but is dumped himself by Teddy! COLE Sandman9000 gone! COACH Teddy just saved PRL! What is this about? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Sandman9000 eliminated by: Theodore Moneymaker ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Teddy then helps PRL to his feet and has a conversation with him. COACH What's going on here, Cole? Teddy then takes out a handful of money, and shows it to PRL. COLE Theodore Moneymaker appears to be attempting to bribe PRL! PRL takes it all in, then tells Teddy to give him a second to think about it. He starts to turn away, then hits him with Sweet Chin Music! COLE Superkick! PRL then grabs Moneymaker and pitches him over the top rope! COACH What's wrong with you, you idiot? PRL tosses Teddy's money back to him, but that allows Reject to grab him from behind and pitch him over the top! COACH Serves him right! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Theodore Moneymaker eliminated by: Tha Puerto Rican eliminated: Tha Puerto Rican eliminated by: Reject ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ PRL and Teddy brawl to the back, as officials pour out of the dressing room to separate them. COLE Well, we now have six participants remaining! COACH Wait, how the hell is Tim Cash still in there? COLE Tim Cash making a nice showing here tonight, but the obvious underdog of this field, which also includes Krista, Reject, Leon Rodez, Christian Wright and Nathaniel Black! Krista battles it out with Wright, while Leon hammers away on Cash, and Reject gets Black in a corner, and delivers a CHOP~! Crowd: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Reject then dumps Black over the top, but only to the apron, as Krista avoids Wright's Stock Market Crash, and hits the KID-OLOGY~!!!!!11111 Krista celebrates her feat, only to be dropped with Reject's EULOGY~!!!!!11111 Leon quickly strikes with a dropkick to Reject's knee, followed by his ROLLING SOBAT KICK~!!!!!11111 Leon stares down at the carnage...until Cash sneaks up from behind and tosses him to the floor! COLE/COACH LEON CASH Crowd................. :headbang: COACH ...did I just see that?!? COLE Yes you did! Leon Rodez eliminated, at the hands of Tim Cash! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Leon Rodez eliminated by: Tim Cash ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Leon knocks a referee to the ground and rolls back inside, clipping Cash from behind, then drilling him with the ROLLING SOBAT KICK~!!!!!11111 COLE Hey! This is uncalled for! Leon was eliminated fair and square! Leon slides out of the ring, leaving Cash laying unconscious, and retreats to the dressing room showered with boos. Reject picks up Cash and casually pitches him to the floor. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Tim Cash eliminated by: RejectFinal Four: Christian Wright, Nathaniel Black, Krista Isadora Duncan, Reject ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE This is a travesty for Tim Cash! His opportunity stolen by Leon Rodez! Reject then goes back to work on Black, while Krista chokes at Wright. Reject tosses Krista off of Wright, then begins to choke at her. Wright slowly gets to his feet, and works over Black. He shoots Black into the ropes, but Black ducks a clothesline, and tries for the CROSSFACE CHICKEN WING~!!!!!11111 Wright struggles to the ropes before Black can drop back to the mat, and dumps him over to the floor! COACH Yeah! Nice counter, Christian! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Nathaniel Black eliminated by: Christian Wrightremaining: Christian Wright: Krista Isadora Duncan, Reject ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wright and Reject double team Krista, shooting her into the ropes, and hitting her with a double clothesline! Wright then holds Krista for Reject, who backs into the ropes, and comes at her with a forearm, but Krista moves, and Wright is knocked through the ropes to the apron! COLE Miscommunication there between Reject and Christian! Krista fights back on Reject, then whips him into the ropes...where he goes flying over the top to the floor, as Wright pulls the ropes down while trying to get back inside! COACH No! COLE Reject eliminated! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ eliminated: Reject eliminated by: Christian Wrightremaining: Christian Wright, Krista Isadora Duncan ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Reject shouts insults at Wright as he's pulled back inside by Krista, who assaults Wright on the ropes. She whips him across, but puts her head down, allowing Wright to lay in a kick. Wright then signals for the end, and goes to toss Krista out, but Krista reverses, and tosses Wright to the floor! *************************************************** eliminated: Christian Wright eliminated by: Krista Isadora DuncanWINNER: Krista Isadora Duncan *************************************************** COLE That's it! Krista wins it! BUFFERLadies and gentlemen! The winner of Battlebowl 2010...KRRRRRRRRRRRRISSSSSSSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ISADORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!! COLE Krista is going to AngleSlam, where she will meet the OAOAST World champion, who is currently Mr. Dick! COACH That's gonna be most interesting! COLE Unbelievable night here in Miami! For the Coach, I'm Michael Cole, see you next week on HeldDOWN~! Krista celebrates her victory as we...FADE TO BLACK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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