Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 TV 14 L, V, NPRESENTED IN OAOASTHD* DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA *Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid's shock and delight. An elementary school student, a middle school student and a high school student watch the clock in their respective classrooms as 3:00 nears.BZZZZZZZZZZZT! The bell sounds and scores of students rush out of school, but only after their teachers point to a message on the chalkboard which isn’t revealed to the very end: the School’s Out logo with date of the event underneath. LogoBROUGHT TO YOU BY ALICE IN WONDERLAND ON DVDBOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! B O O M ~! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"LIVE KANSAS CITY, MO We pan around a sold out Kemper Arena. COLE School’s Out, but tonight Class is in Session for the OAOAST superstars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 BUFFER The following contest is the Five Versus Five, Winner Stays On Elimination Match! The rules are as follows. One member of each team of five will start the match, with eliminations occuring via pinfall, submission, disqualification or count-out. When one competitor is eliminated, the winner stays on and the loser is replaced by one of his partners, until all five members of one team have been eliminated. The fanfares of "Parade Of The Charioteers" play throughout the arena and lead out the members of the Cucaracha Kingdom. At the head of the line, of course, the King and Queen of the OAOAST, Landon and Esther. With the Knights, the Prince and as is customary, the Wild Samoan Savage Chewing A Title Belt, all in tow. BUFFER Introducing at this time, team number one! The team accompanied to the ring by QUEEN ESTHER!! Consisting of... LUCIUS SOUL and RICO DE JANEIRO, THE MARDI GRAS HELLFIRE CLUB!! And, the OAOAST World 6-Man Tag Team Champions... "THE SAMOAN WRECKING BALL" FFFAAAAQQQUUU!! "THE TRENDSETTER" JAMES BLONDE!! And, the 2010 OAOAST King Of The Ring... KING LANDON MMMAAAAADDIIIIXXXXX!!!! Together, they comprise the CUCARACHA KINGDOM!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" King Landon spins into the ring and soaks in the reception from his people. COACH Always a glorious day when we're graced by the presence of the King! COLE If you insist. As the Kingdom take their places on the outside, "Chelsea Dagger" pumps out to bring out the opponents. An odd assortment, with Nathaniel Black marching with a purpose alongside Megan, The Last Kings Of Scotland marching angrily and MARV and MEL stopping to hit their jumping high-five and make friends with the crowd along with Melody. BUFFER And ladies and gentlemen, team number two! First, accompanied by MELODY NERDLY... the team of MARV and MEL, THE CHRIST AIR EXPRESS!! Hailing from their native country of Scotland, DANNY BOY and SCOTTISH SCOTT, THE LAST KINGS OF SCOTLAND!! And finally, accompanied to the ring by MEGAN SKYE... ladies and gentlemen, he is NATHANIEL BBLLLLLAAAAAACCKK!!!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE So the rules, as you heard, two men start and when one man is eliminated, he is replaced by one of his team-mates. Interesting to see who is going to get in early and who's happy to sit on the sidelines and wait their turn. Black makes it clear, in no uncertain terms, that he's starting the match. Which doesn't go down great with the Last Kings, not happy taking orders, especially from an Englishman. Megan and Melody call for calm in the team and eventually, the LKOS settle down on the outside and with just a hint of bitterness, agree to let Black go ahead and start. COLE Tension between Black and the Scots. Every one of them wants to get their hands on King Landon here tonight. COACH Well, maybe they ought to be careful what they wish for. Black crouches down in the ring, encouraging one of the Kingdom to man up and get in with him. And finally, the King decides to lead. By pointing at James Blonde and ordering him into the ring. Blonde doesn't seem too sure about this idea and tries to come up with a different, better plan, but the King isn't hearing it. KING LANDON Go! GO! Resigned to his fate, Blonde slowly sets about climbing into the ring. COLE So it'll be Nathaniel Black to start out with, what seems like, an unwilling James Blonde. Usually when the King says jump, Blonde'll say how high and how many times. Thing is, this is like jumping into a lion pit. *DINGDINGDING* As the bell rings, Black smiles at Blonde, in a far from reassuring way. Realising he's in trouble, Blonde stops backtracking and tries to get the first shot in. But that's all he gets before Black overwhelms him and starts beating the tar out of him to wincing looks from Rico and Lucius! "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COACH Oh, JB, fight man, fight! Black stomps a hole in Blonde's back and ribs as the Canadian flails around in pain. He then picks Blonde up and takes him to a corner, where he dishes out a European uppercut! And another one! Now even King Landon is wincing, as Blonde gets whipped to the opposite corner, then CLUBBED as he bounces back out with a hard clothesline! KING LANDON Come on James! Make me proud! More hope than expectation is found in the King's voice as he watches Blonde try to get back to his feet. Black waits patiently. Then, when Blonde is up, Black buries a headbutt into the stomach. Turning him around, Black bends Blonde over backwards and strikes him in the chest with a hard forearm. After looking down at Landon, the Englishman then comes off the ropes and drops a knee. Cover, with Black staring right at the King... 1... 2... No! COLE The King looking on, knowing that pretty soon, that could be him on the recieving end of this punishment. Black drags Blonde back up and delivers a forearm. And another one. Blonde is wobbly, so the Brit hits the ropes, looking for a clothesline. Blonde manages to duck and goes behind, with a waistlock. Which doesn't last long as Black reaches back and grabs him by the EAR! COACH Hey hey hey! COLE He's got him by the ear, like a naughty child! Kicking and wailing Blonde tries to beg off, but Black responds with a hard SLAP, which gets the King all riled up! He thinks about storming the ring, then when Black looks his way, he pretends that Queen Esther is holding him back. COACH That's no way to treat the Prince of the Kingdom! Black simply smirks down at King Landon, before doing a 180 and NAILING Blonde with the Black Lariat!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE Oh, my! How about that for some rough treatment? The King doesn't even bother to pretend to be held back now. He's fine staying out of the match after seeing that clothesline. Black gives him a long look before picking Blonde back up. Barely able to stand, Blonde is held up by a Black half nelson hold, until the Englishman hoists him up and delivers a Half Nelson Backbreaker! Before he can hit the mat, Blonde is then hoisted up again and trapped in the Crossface Chickenwing!! COLE There it is! COACH Come on, James! There's panic in the Kingdom as they watch Blonde being flailed about in the submission... before quickly succumming and giving up!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COACH Oh no! *DINGDING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, James Blonde is eliminated! Landon hangs his head despondantly as Blonde is tossed aside by Black. The Englishman dares Landon to come in next, which is what the crowd in Kansas City want to see. However King Landon doesn't seem ready to fight yet. Instead, he calls over Faqu and gives him a peptalk, ready to send him in to take care of Black. Meanwhile, The Last Kings look on, still unimpressed. COLE Whoa boy. Nathaniel made light work of James Blonde but this will be a much tougher test right here. The three hundred plus pound Samoan Wrecking Ball, Faqu! As Faqu climbs into the ring Black doesn't wait around though and takes the fight right to the Samoan, jumping him right as he gets through the ropes! Black clubs away on Faqu, until the Samoan manages to break through, grab the head and deliver a big headbutt! COACH Yeah! Let's see you try and bully someone around now, Nat! Faqu goes after Black, taking him into a corner. After a clubbing shot to the chest, Faqu goes for an irish whip. But Black manages to reverse and sends Faqu crashing into the buckles! As Faqu staggers out, Black whips him again, into the other corner! And a third time, back where he came from! With the Samoan staggered Nathaniel hits a quick kick and tries to set Faqu up, looking for the Half Nelson Backbreaker again, but not able to lift the three hundred pounder. Instead Faqu backs up, ramming Black into the turnbuckles! KING LANDON *applauds* With the approval of the King, Faqu lines Black up for a big Avalanche in the corner... but MISSES! Faqu stumbles back and gets caught WITH THE HALF NELSON BACKBREAKER!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" KING LANDON COLE YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME~! Black, understandably, grabs his knee, but manages to go for the cover... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE I can't believe that. What strength from Nathaniel Black, to lift up this massive Samoan and hit the Half Nelson Backbreaker! COACH I think the Queen has gone into shock! Black gets to his feet and measures Faqu, ready for the big Lariat. The Kingdom looks on worried, as Black pulls off the 360... but there are cheers of relief, as Black gets trapped with a crushing Belly To Belly Suplex!! "OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Cover by Faqu... 1... 2... Kickout! Encouraged not to worry from the outside, Faqu stays on Black and delivers a throat thrust against the ropes. Irish whip sends Black off, but Black counters a Samoan Drop, catching Faqu with his head down with a kick. Black then charges in, only to get clotheslined by the Samoan. COLE King Landon, starting to loosen up a little. Looking a little more relaxed all of a sudden. With Black down, Faqu comes off the ropes and drops the Big Splash... but NOBODY HOME! The King's relaxation is over now as Black quickly jumps on Faqu's back while he's on all fours and tries to put on the Crossface Chickenwing again! COACH No no no! COLE Black is looking for it, but I think Faqu is too thick to put this hold on. Sure enough, Black is forced to give up when Faqu gets to his feet and breaks free. Ducking a clothesline, Black starts to unload with forearms, backing Faqu up. A couple of European uppercuts start to weaken him up. Black then comes off the ropes with a big clothesline... which Faqu just absorbs! Beating his chest, the Samoan seems to demand more. So Black fires off three more European uppercuts, then hits the ropes for a second clothesline... and Faqu stays standing, just. COLE He's still up. But I think Black is wearing him down, slowly but surely. Sensing some progress, Black tries again. This time Faqu is ready and waiting and swings with a clothesline of his own. But Black manages to catch the arm and turns it into a hammerlock. Coming out the front, Black then kicks out Faqu's foot and gets the hammerlock DDT! Faqu grasps his shoulder when suddenly, it's snatched by Black, trapping Faqu in a CROSSFACE CHICKENWING on the mat!!! COLE HE'S GOT IT ON! COACH No way! Black kneels on Faqu's back to keep him down and tears at the shoulder, to roars of approval from the crowd. Hunched over the apron, King Landon looks on pensively. He stares at Faqu, with a look that's begging his big Samoan not to tap out... ...but that's exactly what he does, draining the colour from the faces of the rest of the Kingdom!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" COLE FAQU TAPS! And Nathaniel Black is mowing through King Landon's Kingdom, one man at a time! *DINGDING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, Faqu has been eliminated! The Last Kings look at each other, arms folded. COLE At this rate, Nathaniel is going to win this single handed. In this mood, he might be capable of beating the entire roster, if it means getting hold of Landon. Looking around for troops, King Landon takes one look at both Rico and Lucius, neither of them wanting to get anywhere near Nathaniel Black right about now. So, with the referee calling for the next entrant, King Landon mans up and starts to disrobe! "YYYYYEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COLE Oh my! Here we go! COACH Alright, the King's had enough! Let's get this over with! If this rock-headed idiot insists on daring to challenge the King, let him get what's coming to him! The Queen takes hold of Landon's robe and looks unsure as he climbs onto the apron. Black can barely contain himself, daring Landon on. The King stares back from the apron, trying to fire himself up. "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" "LAN - DON SUCKS!" With a hostile crowd and an even more hostile opponent, Landon stalls for a while. Black goes to move in but the referee holds him back, giving Landon a fair chance to enter the ring. Which, eventually, he does... ...before immediately bailing out the side and heading up the ramp! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" COLE Wait a minute! COACH Uh-oh. The King must have remembered some important duty that he has to attend to. COLE Or maybe he remembered that he wants no part of Nathaniel Black! Look at him go! Trying to look nonchalant and walk as fast as humanly possible at the same time, Landon glances nervously over his shoulder a couple of times. And on the second time, spots Nathaniel leaving the ring in pursuit! So Landon manages to pick up his walking pace into a jog, fast enough to take him through the curtains and heading towards the hills, with Black running after him! COLE Well Nathaniel Black is going to try and get his hands on Landon one way or the other, but he's going to have to do it in the parking lot, because the referee is counting and these two are showing no signs of turning back! COACH Someone get the King's carriage ready! *DINGDING* BUFFER The referee has counted BOTH Landon Maddix and Nathaniel Black out of the ring and BOTH have been eliminated from this contest! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Left looking on at ringside, The Mardi Gras Hellfire Club try to get over their King deserting them and call a conference with the Queen. Meanwhile, as Megan heads off after Black, that leaves The Last Kings Of Scotland and The Christ Air Express on their team. Rico enters for the Kingdom, up against MARV, who wins rock, paper scissors as judged by Melody. COLE So it's now 2 on 4, essentially. A great leader, the King turned out to be. Rico and MARV lock up, which Rico breaks immediately with a knee to the gut. Clubbing away, Rico stops and strokes down the porn 'stache, before clubbing away some more. Irish whip shoots MARV to the ropes. MARV evades Rico with a baseball slide through the legs, then avoids a clothesline and hits him with a dropkick off the ropes. COLE And the pace will definately quicken now, with MARV in this match. Hitting the ropes again, MARV hooks his way around Rico with a headscissors takeover and quickly goes for the pin... 1... 2 - No. As MARV tries to get a hold of Rico the Brazilian quickly cuts him off with a shot to the gut, then hangs MARV up with a hotshot across the top rope! "OOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!" Much happier with a slower pace, Rico takes his time and stomps away on his speedier opponent. Whipped to the ropes, MARV then gets caught with a Powerslam! 1... 2... No! Rico sets MARV back down and backs into the ropes, for a very deliberate legdrop, stroking down the 'stache as he pins MARV down... 1... 2... No. COLE That's simply not going to get it done. COACH It gets it done with the ladies Michael, lemme tell ya. After a few more stomps, Rico is feeling good and jaws with the crowd. Lucius likes it too. And Rico looks in complete control as he lifts MARV up, trapping him in the Body Lock. However, a little bit too much confidence allows MARV to slip down the shoulder and escape! Landing on his feet, MARV delivers a quick kick to the back of the leg. And another. Rico takes a swing at him, but MARV ducks and up-ends Rico with a back legsweep, then follows up with a Standing Moonsault!! "YYYEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" 1... 2... Kickout! MARV tries to catch Rico on his way up with a forearm, but the Brazilian blocks and delivers a boot to the gut. COLE Rico cuts MARV off again, but you can tell he's having some problems keeping up. Taking in some deep breaths, Rico throws MARV to the ropes. But MARV comes flying back and catches Rico cold with a flying forearm! COLE And again, the speed of MARV, just too much! Looking to capitalise MARV boots Rico and sets him up, ready to run the rails with the Acid Drop. Rico throws MARV off, but the high-flier manages to stop himself in the corner. Fending Rico off with an elbow MARV then leaps to the middle rope, twisting back with a crossbody block! 1... 2... Kickout! As the Queen looks on nervously, MARV ducks underneath a shot from a flagging Rico and comes off the ropes... but suddnly faceplants, thanks to a trip from the outside by Lucius!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Hey! Lucius, behind the referee's back! MARV stumbles back up and right into the Hand Of God from Rico, who quickly covers... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, MARV of The Christ Air Express has been eliminated! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" No time to celebrate for Rico though, who turns around to find MEL soaring in off the top with a high crossbody!! 1... 2... Kickout! COLE And MEL picking up right where his brother left off! MEL dishes out some forearms to Rico, keeping him off balance. Hitting the ropes MEL manages to avoid another lazy clothesline. But he doesn't avoid the Harley Race knee on the rebound, sending him flying! Cover by Rico... 1... 2... No! Rico backs into a corner, waiting for MEL to get back up. COLE I think Rico could do with a tag out here, but that's not how this match works. COACH He's doing fine if you ask me. COLE His tongue is practically hanging by his chest! Summoning some divine inspiration Rico attempts the Hand Of God again, but MEL manages to tuck and roll out of the way! Rico stops and tries a charge in the corner, but MEL avoids him again. And with Rico winded in the corner, MEL comes flying in with a big corner clothesline, landing on the middle rope! As Rico staggers out MEL then slips outside and skins the cat, catching Rico with a headscissors! COLE Great moves here by MEL! MEL waits for Rico and connects with a Spinning Heel Kick, looking for the pin... 1... 2... No! With the Scots looking on impatiently, MEL heads to the top rope. On his way there though MEL finds himself distracted, as Lucius teases getting onto the apron. The referee deals with him, but the distraction proves costly as it allows Rico to crotch MEL on the turnbuckles! With MEL hurt, it allows Rico to lift him off the top and over his shoulder, up and ready for the MOUSTACHE RIDE, driving MEL into the canvas!! Cover... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDING* BUFFER MEL of The Christ Air Express has been eliminated! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And once again, teamwork pays off for the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club, in what's supposed to be a one on one mini-contest. COACH It's winner stays on and Rico stays on, because he won. That's all that matters. Rico is feeling in the party mood now, stroking his 'stache in celebration. The dancing and joviality from he and Lucius stops abruptly though. Lucius, eyes wide, points behind Rico, to Scottish Scott, who levels him with a big clothesline!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" COACH Now come on, this isn't fair! The man is clearly tired! COLE That's not what you were saying a minute ago. COACH Well, he just hit the wall. It happens all of a sudden. Scott goes to work on Rico, hammering his former fellow Queen's Man in the corner. Whipped across Rico is then mowed down by the Flying Scotsman in the corner!! Scott whips Rico back again and hits him with the Flying Scotsman a second time, knocking whatever air Rico had left right out of him!! Setting him up in the middle of the ring, Scott then gives a cursorary look to the outside, before muscling the big Brazilian up and delivering a Jackhammer!! COLE The Jockhammer~! COACH You've gotta be kidding me! 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDING* BUFFER Rico de Janeiro has been eliminated!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" COLE And now, the Kingdom is but one man! Scott rolls Rico away, but Lucius is already in the ring and jumps Scott before he knows what's hit him. The Black Knight puts his funky feet to Scott, then tries to pin him down and get lucky... 1... No such luck. COLE Lucius trying to get this over quick. But even if he does, he's still got to get through Danny Boy as well. Lucius fires away with right hands, which eventually stop having an effect on the big Scotsman. At which point, Lucius tries begging off. Scott responds with a boot to the gut and whips Lucius to the ropes, picking him up in a Gorilla Press... and letting him fall back down to earth with a thud! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!" Rolling towards a corner, Lucius puts himself in harm's way, which isn't lost on the Queen. She begs her man to move, run, escape, anything. But too late, as the Flying Scotsman motors in and engulfs him in the turnbuckles!! COLE Oh my! Two hundred sixty pounds, just annihiliating Lucius Soul! COACH Cover your eyes, Queen. Protect your gentle heart! Lucius makes it two steps before collapsing in a heap, right at Scott's feet. Looking down at him, Scott seems unimpressed. He turns to the outside and asks Danny Boy if he wants a piece, which he does. So the big Scotsman proceeds to pick Lucius back up... AND BOOT HIM BELOW THE BELT!!!! COACH AAAHHHHH!! QUEEN ESTHER *DINGDING* Scott, very calmly, steps back with his hands up and agrees to leave as the ref calls for the bell. BUFFER Due to a lowblow, the referee has disqualified Scottish Scott, eliminating him from this match! COLE And I don't think he cares! With Scott gone, that makes Danny Boy legal. And he wants to get in on the fun. Danny Boy takes over from his partner, who decides to hang around at ringside, not expecting this to last long. Which it doesn't, as Danny immediately lifts Lucius up on his shoulders, hanging over certain doom. Turning to the Queen, Danny Boy gives a royal thumbs down... AND SPIKES LUCIUS WITH THE BACK TO FRONT TOMBSTONE!!!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Goodnight, sweet Knight! 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, Lucius Soul has been eliminated... therefore, your winner of the match, representing The Last Kings Of Scotland... DDAAAAAANNYYYYY BBOOOOOOOYYYYYY!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Scott re-enters the ring and gives a high fist pump to his partner, as the Queen is horror stricken still on the outside. The LKOS stand tall over Lucius and decide to rub it in, placing a foot on Lucius's prone body and beating their chests triumphantly! COLE A measure of revenge here tonight for The Last Kings Of Scotland, over the Cucaracha Kingdom. But I've got a feeling that they, along with Nathaniel Black, still want to get their hands on the monarch himself, Landon Maddix, sometime and someplace very soon. As Lucius is rolled out to be fussed over by the disconsolate Queen, the Last Kings stand tall in the ring, celebrating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 We're taken backstage to the interview area (different than the interview lounge!) where Terry Taylor stands in front of numerous video monitors with Genevieve Duncan. Man, I wished I had picked an easier first name to spell. TERRY Hello, everybody, I’m backstage with the beautiful Genevieve Duncan. Mrs.Duncan, you look absolutely fabulous. I mean, there are women half your age who don’t look as good. You look like you could be Morgan’s younger sister, and she’s nineteen! GENEVIEVE Oh, honey, stop. TERRY Well, okay. GENEVIEVE I’m kidding, do continue. Oh! It is great to see my daugher finished your potty training lesson. TERRY I’ve been potty trained since I was six years old! GENEVIEVE But did you realize the toilets are for us humans, and the newspaper is for you creatures? TERRY Why must I every evenening be spent being mercilessly tortured by everywoman in the Duncan family? Um, Mrs.Duncan, I don’t mean to pry but can you explain your relationship with OAOAST world champion Mister Dick. GENEVIEVE Honey, what is there to explain? Jock understands the value of a mature woman’s company. A younger girl will always let you down. Always. Your credit score’s not good enough, or you’ve been to jail one to many times, or you skipped out on child support on five of your six children. A young girl will think of any reason to break your heart. TERRY You’ve got a point there. GENEVIEVE But a mature woman, a woman who’s experienced life’s trials and tribulations, she will always be there to comfort, nurture, and love you. I suppose to answer your question, Jock is a trusted friend and a valued companion. His company is treasured. He makes me laugh, he challenges me, and he appreciates the love and respect I give him. He makes me feel as though I’m young again! And it doesn’t hurt that the young man is smoking hot. But then again, so am I, and shouldn’t us gorgeous people associate with one another. TERRY That explains why Krista hangs around me! Because I’m damn sexy! Well, Mrs.Duncan, Mister Dick and Baron Windells will face Alix and your eldest daughter Krista for the world titles in tonight’s mainevent here at School’s Out. I can only assume your putting your friendship with Mister Dick aside to root for your daughter. GENEVIEVE Honey, you know what they say when you assume things? You make an ass out of “u” and me. I will be doing no such thing. I’ll be remaining impartial through the course of the contest. TERRY But, Krista, is your daughter. GENEVIEVE That may well be, but Mister Dick is my treasured friend. And I wouldn’t dream of rooting against him. I’ll be rooting for an entertaining and spirited match. May the best team win! TERRY Well, thank you for your time, Mrs.Duncan. Please enjoy the show. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 We cut on location to an elementary school. COLE It's time for the Sunday Detention match for the OAOAST Heartland championship! There you see the building where the match will take place! Cut to a classroom where the participants are sitting at comically undersized desks, likely a kindergarten or first-grade classroom. Four referees stand behind the teachers' desk. The back corner of the room is occupied by the Ghetto Groove Monkeys...Vinny Valentine, Deadbeat Dave, the Burrough Boys, and Tony Tourettes. Jumbo is shown pulling a bag of Cheetos out of a lunchbox, as Bosley and CPA walk into the classroom. Sandman9000 sticks his foot out and trips Bosley, who hops up and is restrained by CPA as Sandman and Thunderkid laugh. Denzel then walks into the classroom, and the school bell rings. Terry Taylor walks into the classroom and sits at the teacher's desk. TERRY OK, guys, it's time for the Sunday Detention match, for the OAOAST Heartland championship! A paper airplane, launched by Vinny Valentine, strikes Terry in the head as he finishes the sentence. Terry gives a stare to Vinny, and continues. TERRY This is a 20-minute match, with man-to-beat rules...if someone pins Denzel, that man becomes the man to beat. Whoever has scored the last pin when 20 minutes runs out will be the champion. I'm going to take roll call, and then we'll get the match started. First, the defending Heartland champion, Denzel Spencer! Denzel raises his hand. TERRY From the Enterprise, Bosley and CPA, V.I.C.E.! BOSLEY Yeah. TERRY Tim Cash! Cash stands up and sits down. TONY FAGGOT TERRY Colombian Heat! HEAT Yo! TERRY Spanish Fly! Fly raises his hand. TERRY Cuban Wall! Wall does the same. TERRY "Virgin Island Thunder" Victor Perez! PEREZ Yep. TERRY Simon Singleton and Ned Blanchard, the Orange County Cobras! NED Over here. TERRY From the Deadly Alliance, Thunderkid and Sandman9000! Both raise their hands. TERRY The Ghetto Groove Monkeys! VINNY Yeah, we're here. MARIANO Damn skippy we here, nigga! We 'bout ta get real like Shaquille O'Neal, cuz we the superintendents of pain! TERRY ...right. Deuce and Jumbo! DEUCE We're here. TERRY Ok, looks like that's everyone, so let's... Terry is interrupted by Black Sweat playing over the intercom. COACH Boy, I didn't see this coming! Roars are heard, as MISTER Warrior emerges from the coat room, and pounds on his chest. He delivers a big right hand to Cuban Wall, then tips his desk over. COLE We're underway! He grabs a pencil box, and smashes it over Wall's head, then exits the room and runs down the hallway at full speed. Everyone else in the room begins to brawl, as Terry ducks for cover, then runs and DIVES OUT THE WINDOW! Everyone in the room suddenly freezes and makes their way over to the window. Clearly they all forgot that the building was only one story, and just see Terry brushing himself off outside. TERRY I'm OK, guys! Tony Tourettes throws an empty Capri Sun pouch and hits Terry in the face. TERRY Hey, Tony, respect the pouch! The wrestlers all walk away from the window unimpressed. TK Next time jump out the window that leads into traffic! The combatants continue brawling, as the alarm sounds to start the timer. COLE OK, now that that retardedness is out of the way, the match has officially started! Denzel Spencer of course is the man to beat!KEY -Classrooms are surrounded by purple borders, with blue marks for the doors. -The yellow lines are the windows. -The orange boxes are staircases. -The big room outlined in green is the gym, and the dark green box is the bleachers, which extend from the wall. There are two entrances to the gym from the main hall I forgot to add in. -The light blue box on the outside is a cage containing the electrical box. -The room outlined in red with the poorly-made star is where the wrestlers begin the match. -The skinny rooms in the back of the gym are locker rooms. -The room directly across from the office is the restrooms. There are two doors on there, it is actually two different bathrooms. The girls' is the one around the corner closest to the staircase. There is a basement floor if you go down said staircase with more classrooms, which extends to the set of stairs to the far left of the building. (Notice the "Hill" on the back side of the building, it dips down to the basement levels, and there are actually windows to the basement classrooms as well.) -G is a garage. -P is the principal's office. -B is a broom closet. -T is the teachers' lounge. -L is the library. (contrary to the map, there is only one door to the library, the one separating it from the gym. It's actually a little bit of a drop from to windows to the blacktop below, as it slopes down from the back door.) -K is the kitchen. -Not sure why I marked the lunch line with an "E", but yeah, E is for the lunch line. Any other questions, just ask, if you -even read what's under the picture, which you most likely didn't anyway! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 Victor Perez helps Denzel fight off Mariano and Waldo as a referee trails. COLE And the referee will follow the action where Denzel Spencer is, you noticed there were four referees in the classroom, extras in case of an injury to the original referee, they can send a new one to the location! COACH What happens if all four referees are injured? COLE Well, then I suppose no one will be available to count for the duration of the match. COACH So if Denzel wanted, he could just take out all four referees and then no one could count him out! COLE Well, in that case, I'm sure President Baker would step in and issue some sort of discipline. Wall and Fly double-team Jumbo, as Tim Cash helps the big man out. The OCC and VICE have made their way through the back door outside the building and are duking it out. COACH No love lost between these two teams, Cole! Bosley grabs Simon and tosses him into the side of a dumpster, as back inside, Deuce and Deadbeat Dave brawl their way into a classroom. Dave grabs a pair of erasers and makes a chalk cloud, which stuns Deuce long enough for Dave to grab a yardstick, which he breaks over Deuce's back. The broken piece flies into the camera. COACH Whoa, not even the cameramen are safe in this one! Quincy enters the room and assists Dave, as in the gym, Sandman hammers away on Colombian Heat. COLE And there's history between these two, as well! In the teachers' lounge, it's a triple-team, as Vinny, Wall and Fly gang up on Denzel, as Tony raids the fridge, coming out with a pack of bologna and a can of cheese spray, then sprays the cheese on the bologna and rolls it up to eat. Vinny and Fly each grab an arm of Denzel, and ram him into a pop machine, followed by a big boot from Wall, who covers... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH We got a pin! COLE Cuban Wall is now the man to beat! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ man to beat: Cuban Wall time: 1:32 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Wall stops to celebrate, while Vinny makes signals to Tony, who grabs a jar of mayonaise out of the fridge, and busts it over the back of Wall's head as Vinny tosses Fly into the pop machine, then covers Wall... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Yeah Vinny! COLE And now Vinny Valentine is the man to beat! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ man to beat: Vinny Valentine time: 1:48 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Vinny enters the library and shuts off the lights, then peeks into the gym looking for the right time to sneak out. He blocks the teachers lounge -> library door with a desk. TONY HEY, THEY GOT FUCKIN DR SEUSS BOOKS IN HERE! Vinny jogs to the back window to see if that's a way out, but decides it's not a safe jump. He calls Tony over. VINNY Hey, I'm gonna open this window, and I want you to hang from the sill. Then I'm going to climb down the back of you to the ground. TONY ...YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT UP TO YOUR DICK! COACH Uh, I gotta side with Tony there, that's not gonna work out. As Vinny and Tony banter, we cut back to the gym, where TK and Sandman double-bodyslam Jumbo onto the bleachers. Sandman then slams Perez on the court, and TK jumps up and grabs the rim, pulling himself up, then letting go and coming down on Perez with an elbow! COACH Look at those hops from TK!Black Sweat then plays again, as MISTER Warrior comes roaring out of a storage closet with a bag full of basketballs. He empties it out, and begins hurling basketballs at anything that moves. Once the bag is empty, he raises his arms into the sky, then runs into the kitchen. COACH That guy is a fucking weirdo. Cut back outside, where it's Vinny who has decided to hang from the window sill, as Tony climbs down. COLE What are those idiots doing? Tony drops to the ground. VINNY OK, now catch me! TONY I'M NOT CATCHIN YOUR GAY ASS! VINNY Hey, I could have caught you, but no, you didn't want to hang! Catch me, you pussy! Vinny drops, and Tony breaks his fall as both crash to the ground. Vinny notices a window to a basement classroom which has been left open. He heads for the window, but Tony wanders off on his own. He spots the OCCs and VICE still doing battle. COLE Boy, VICE and the Cobras still haven't stopped! Tony walks to the frey and eggs them on, when suddenly Denzel bursts out the gym door, and flips over the stair railing, taking out all five guys! COLE Look at Denzel! COACH Even poor Tony took a hit there! Cut to the basement classroom, as Vinny slides down through the window, then peeks out into the hallway, as the referee meets him at the door, causing him to jump back in surprise. Vinny lets him in and shuts the door. COLE And Vinny just trying to hide out downstairs, but plenty of time left in this match, someone will find him eventually! Deadbeat Dave and Spanish Fly double-team Tim Cash in the library, while Wall and Deuce do battle as well. Deuce delivers a series of headbutts to Wall, then hiptosses him into a bookshelf, which causes all the aisles of books to fall down like dominoes! COACH There goes the library! Tony wanders up the stairs and inside the gym, towards the kitchen, as Heat and Jumbo work over Sandman. COLE Tony is not a participant in this match, we should point out, he was just here tagging along with the Ghetto Groove Monkeys! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 As Tony makes his way to the kitchen, Sandman makes his way outside, and Heat and Jumbo follow. Jumbo starts hammering on CPA, while Sandman and Ned do battle. COLE And now we've got a big crowd of participants converging outside the school! Cash and Fly have made their way through to the lunch line, where Black Sweat plays once again, and MISTER Warrior is seen behind the counter with spaghetti hanging from his mouth, as he pumps his arms in the air, hands full of spaghetti. A slice of meatloaf comes flying into the screen and hits him in the side of the face, which came from Tony. MISTER Warrior looks Tony up and down. COLE Well, this is quite a staredown here! MISTER Warrior snarls, then roars at Tony, who roars back. MISTER Warrior then rubs a handful of the spaghetti in Tony's face. COLE Shades of George "The Animal" Steele and the turnbuckle stuffing! We cut back to Vinny hiding out in the classroom, back in the coat hall. He hears the door open. LUTHER (off-camera) Nigga, you knew dem teachers be storin' dat prime stash on the job! Vinny peeks around the corner, and sees the BB's setting up shop in the classroom. MARIANO Yo, V-squared! Git yo' nary ass over here! You 'bout to be the Heartland champion, we gon' celebrate the way we do, wit' some a dat hydro green-green! Vinny sits down, as Deadbeat Dave also enters the room. Cut back to the library, where Deuce and Wall are doing battle. Wall knocks Deuce to the ground, then grabs two dictionaries and brings them into the sides of Deuce's head like cymbals. Cash then jumps onto the back of him. Cut outside, where Heat is making his way to the swingset as VICE, OCC, Jumbo and Sandman all do battle. Heat gives himself a nice push, then when he gets into the air, he jumps out of the swing, landing onto the mass of bodies! COLE Colombian Heat taking advantage of his surroundings! COACH I remember when I did that to the kindergartners at my school. COLE I didn't think 6th graders shared recesses with kindergarteners. COACH No, this was just last week! You should have seen how mad those teachers were. COLE I can only imagine. Spanish Fly is then shown on top of the swingset. COACH Oh my... COLE Fly must be some 20 feet in the air! When the gang of bodies gets back up, Fly drops down and grabs the pole of the swingset, much like a gymnast on a balance beam, then pulls himself forward and flips through the air, also like a gymnast, landing on the crowd! COACH Whoa! COLE Spanish Fly with a sensational move! As the bodies start to stir, we cut back to the classroom, which naturally is engulfed in smoke. WALDO Yo maaaannnn...when I signed up for pottery in high school...*takes a puff*...this is what I was envisionin'! LUTHER Nigga, you trippin! You prolly thought "high" school meant somethin' else, too. QUINCY Y'all prolly thought y'all was gon' be sittin all up in each other like those cats from Ghost, moldin' stuff. Patrick Swayze, God rest his soul. MARIANO Worrrrrrrrrd. Tony then busts in the room, followed by MISTER Warrior, and a slowed-down version of Black Sweat playing. LUTHER The fuck you bringin' this crazy ass white boy wit' you? MISTER Warrior roars at Luther. WALDO What up, maaaaaann? *takes hit* You ain't gon' snitch, are you? MISTER Warrior growls again. TONY DON'T JUST SIT THEIR ON YOUR BALLS, GET THE MAN SOME DOPE! VINNY It looks like he's already got some dope! BB's/DAVE Cut back outside, where Sandman sets up Ned on a swing, then pulls him back and lets him swing into TK, who drills him with a BICYCLE KICK~! COLE Nice double-team move there by Sandman and TK of the Deadly Alliance! Meanwhile, up on the steps leading into the gym, Bosley is attempting to suplex Perez down onto the electrical box! COLE Oh no, this can't happen! Bosley trying to get Victor Perez electricuted! COACH It CAN happen, and it must happen, before any more PRL bretheren are spread along the OAOAST! However, Perez is able to straighten himself out midway through and come back down in front, then lift Bosley and drop him gut-first over the stair railing! Perez then steps to the side for Denzel, who executes a SCISSOR KICK~! to Bosley, who falls to the blacktop a few feet below. COLE And thank goodness Bosley didn't complete that move! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 Deuce is shown roaming the halls, looking for the referee which would lead him to Vinny. Deuce looks in the broom closet, then starts going from classroom to classroom looking for him. Wall stalks him down the hall, following him into a classroom, where Deuce spots him and shoves a desk into his midsection. He then grabs a lunchbox, and clubs Wall over the head with it. Cut back to the classroom where Vinny is hiding out, along with the BB's Dave, Tony, and MISTER Warrior in a huge cloud of smoke. MISTER Warrior The day my grandfather died, I never exactly knew how to deal with the death of a loved one, especially this being my first experience. I took a walk that day: sat on the swings and cried as I thought the death of a loved one is often one of the most painful experiences everyone goes through. When someone dies, we often feel at a loss, and to express our emotions and heartfelt feelings and at the same time brings our deep seated fear of death to the fore. In the grief of the death of my grandfather, whom we were all close to, we shouldn't forget the positive qualities of him just because he is no longer physically here in our world. LUTHER Speak. MISTER Warrior (pulling out a piece of paper) This poem helps me to remember the real essence of my grandfather: "Not how he died-but how he lived, not what did he gain-but what he gave. These are the units to measure the worth of a man as a man regardless of birth". There's no necessity for funerals to be just solemn occasions devoid of smiling and laughter. Humour is an essential part of life so why not of death? QUINCY Worrrrrrd. MISTER Warrior Everything we see has its roots in the unseen world. The forms may change yet the essence remains the same. Most people define themselves by this finite body. Even under microscope, we're an energy field. I got up and smiled, as I thought, my grandfather's a spiritual being! He's an energy field, operating in a larger energy field, and like anything as Quantum Physicists discovered, energy can never be created nor destroyed. It always was, always has been, always will be everything that ever existed and will always exist. It's moving in form, through form and out of form. WALDO That's deep, maaaaaaaannnnnnnn. MARIANO Who's hungry, man? Mariano starts tearing through a bag of chips. LUTHER Yo, slow down, Frito Santana, save some for everybody! Vinny starts laughing, and falls back on the floor in laughter. Waldo gets the referee's attention. WALDO Yo, count this nigga out. Waldo lays back on Vinny... 1... 2... 3!!! COLE ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ man to beat: Waldo time in: 12:55 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Waldo gets up and sneaks out, as no one else even notices in the confusion. He gets about halfway down the hall, when one of the classroom doors swings open and clobbers him, sending him to the ground. Victor Perez emerges from the room, and covers... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Oh, no! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ man to beat: "Virgin Island Thunder" Victor Perez time in: 13:23 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COLE Boy, wouldn't this be something, if Victor Perez, in his short time in the company, could walk out of here with the Heartland title? Victor makes his way upstairs, where he's met by Fly, as the two lock horns. CPA and Heat join the frey as they burst through the doors. Cut outside, where Denzel and Bosley are swinging at each other as they climb the jungle gym. Both get to the top, sitting on bars, and exchange blows, until Denzel ducks back to avoid one, then rams Bosley's head into the bars. COLE A little matrix action from Denzel there! Denzel then pulls himself up, and lifts Bosley, then drops him, crotching him on the bars. COACH Oh no! Denzel climbs down and makes his way towards the building, entering the doors where Heat and CPA continue to brawl, and gives Heat a hand. COLE Denzel, I understand, very good friends with Colombian Heat, and giving him a hand right here! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 As those two work over CPA, we cut back to the teachers' lounge, where Perez knocks Fly to the ground, then opens the fridge, which for some reason has beer in it, and pulls one out to drink. He sees Fly coming to his feet, and tosses the beer can at him, and catches him lunging over the table, delivering shots to the back. Wall enters the room and hammers on Perez, and a double-team ensues. COLE And now it's Wall and Fly, the partners, going to work on Victor Perez, who is the man to beat! Cash and Jumbo come in to the aid of Perez, as Jumbo and Wall tumble into the library, and Cash hammers on Fly in the lounge. Perez gets to his feet and walks into the hallway, where Bosley swings the door to the broom closet open and tosses a bucket of mop water into his face! COLE Bosley with a mop bucket, and who knows what's in that water! Bosley hits the blinded Perez with a roundhouse kick, and covers... 1... 2... 3!!! COLE And now Bosley, with just over 3 minutes to go, is the man to beat! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ man to beat: Det. Tango Bosley time in: 16:38 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bosley gets up and starts walking around the hallway as if he's searching for something, as Fly jumps onto the back of Deuce as he tries to pursue. Ned makes his way into the hall to go after Bosley. COLE Less than three minutes left in the match now! Ned tackles him into the wall, but Bosley is able to fight back and hammer him down. Bosley makes his way to the left end of the hallway, and pulls the fire alarm. COACH FIRE DRILL! Everyone outside! Everyone stops and puts their hands on their hips, looking around, as Bosley runs down the hall, along with the referee, trying to usher everyone out. Denzel looks on, unimpressed, as everyone reluctantly leaves the building. COLE I can't believe Bosley may get away with this! COACH What are you talking about? You have to go outside on a fire drill, didn't you go to school? COLE But Bosley pulled the fire alarm himself! This is no drill! Denzel grabs Bosley from behind, and throws him through a trophy case in the center hall! COLE Bosley right through the glass! Denzel covers... 1... 2... 3!!! COLE And Denzel, with two minutes to go, is back on top! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ man to beat: Denzel Spencer time in: 18:03 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Denzel walks around the hall, and into a classroom, then opens up a window and yells at the other competitors, who are all out on the sidewalk. They all make their way back to the door. COACH And look, everyone else is still outside! As the contestants stumble over each other getting back to the building, Vinny sneaks into the classroom behind Denzel. COLE No, look! COACH Oh, it's Vinny! They were down stairs the whole time, remember? Vinny creeps behind and spins Denzel around, but Denzel blocks a punch, and fires off rights on Vinny! COLE But Denzel was ready for it, and he's got just over a minute to keep from being pinned and retain his title! Vinny grabs Denzel, and slides him across a round table onto the floor on the other side. COLE Less than a minute remaining! Vinny crawls across the floor, as Luther and Waldo wearily wander into the room, but are knocked to the floor by a superkick and a spinkick, respectively. COLE And now Denzel fighting off the Burrough Boys! A split screen comes up, showing the mass of bodies brawling in the hallway, as they make their way to the room Denzel is in. COLE 30 seconds left! Denzel makes his way over to the teachers' desk, and hammers Vinny, who is getting up on the other side of it. Denzel climbs over the desk to get at him, when TK suddenly appears and delivers a low blow. TK then climbs onto the desk, and turns him over and hooks him, driving him with a SCORPION DEATHDROP~!!!!!11111 onto the desk! Cover... 1... 2... 3!!! COACH Hey! COLE TK with the pin, and there's only 10 seconds left!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ man to beat: Thunderkid time in: 19:50 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As the 10-second countdown is made over the intercom, TK gets down and scoots out of the room, jogging back to the room where the match started, and grabs the belt from Terry Taylor as the school bell rings! COACH YES~! COLE We've got a new Heartland champion! Thunderkid steals it right from under Denzel's nose right at the end! The referee raises his hand, as Terry gets up from the desk. TERRY The match is over, here is the winner, and NEW OAOAST Heartland champion, from the Deadly Alliance, THUNDERKID! TK YEAHHHHHHHH~! TERRY A huge win for you, TK, where do you go from here? TK I'm gonna carry this title proud, just like I have in the past! I'll take on anybody and everybody who gets in my way, because that's the way we do in the Deadly Alliance! TK stops to catch his breath. TK But first, I'm gonna celebrate in the Virgin Islands...and when I get back, it'll just be called "The Islands", baby. TERRY Very nice. Congratulations to TK, let's throw it back to Sofa Central! COLE OK, thanks Terry, and for TK, he begins his third reign as Heartland champion, Coach, that puts him in elite company, only Alfdogg and Tha Puerto Rican had held that title on three separate occasions! COACH That's right, Cole! You know, a lot of people look at TK as sort of the whipping boy of the DA, but they forget how many titles this guy has held in the past! This is a tremendous competitor! COLE And he proved that in this match, the winner of the Sunday Detention match, and the new OAOAST Heartland champion! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 COLE Standing by right now is our colleague Josh Matthews who is with the One & Only World tag team champions. We cut to the locker room area where Josh is joined by OAOAST World Champion Mr. Dick, his main squeeze Malaysia and Baron Windels. JOSH Guys, in recent weeks you’ve not only gotten into it with COD and the Orange County Cobras but each other as well. Just how prepared are you for your title defense later tonight against COD? BARON Well-- MISTER DICK (pats BW on chest) As the captain of the team I’ll handle this one, big fella. MD snaps his fingers and Malaysia shoves Josh out the door. MISTER DICK Preparation is overrated. I rely on my instincts in the ring. It won’t be a cakewalk but I will walk out of here tonight still one half of the One & Only World tag team champions… and it’ll be all because of my instincts. TIM CASH enters the picture. CASH I’d just like to say one thing real quick. MISTER DICK CASH No matter the outcome of the match, whether the Lone Star Gunslingers retain or COD win their historic 6th tag title, I hope whatever hard feelings there are can be put aside in the spirit of friendship. Thank you. Citizen Soldiers high five as we go back to the arena. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen this next contest is set for one fall... and is for the OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first at this time, your special guest referee for this match... MMMOOOOORRRGGAAAAANN NNEEEEERRRRDDLLLLYYYYYYYY!!!!GO! To un-explain the unforgivable, Drain all the blood and give the kids a show. By streetlight this dark night, A séance down below. There are things that I have done, You never should ever know! And without you is how I disappear, And live my life alone forever now. And without you is how I disappear, And live my life alone forever now. Charges of electricity scream down on an entrance stage that’s carpeted by dark blue lights. On the numerous video screen images of flashes of electrical bolts find their way onto screen. After the final violent bolt of electricity touches down on stage, out shuffles Morgan Nerdly, looking unsure of herself in this unfamiliar role. COLE I tell you what, you want to talk about 'combustable elements'. Morgan is unpredictable. She's dangerous. She's also a former Women's Champion. But to expect Morgan to be able to maintain control of a professional wrestling match, especially one involving someone like Holly? This just screams disaster to me. COACH I don't know. She's a meek girl but after everything we've seen outta Morgan, if she says do something, I dunno about you, but I'd do it. Fast! Morgan approaches and enters the ring, her referee's shirt a little baggy on her, certainly not a custom made. She looks unsure of where to stand and wanders around the ring aimlessly before finding a corner and settling there.Crush Crush Crush CrushCrushCrush TWO THREE FOUR Green and gold lights flash at the sight of the entry way, while pillars of smoke spring forth from around the chaotic illumination. Underneath a white bridal veil, Maggie Nerdly skips out from the back and flashes the famous Nerdly RAWK~! hand signal to the adoring crowd. As she makes her way down the ramp she slaps hands with the eager fans as any right minded baby face would do! BUFFER Now, introducing the participants. First, the challenger! From Edmonton, Alberta Canada... she is the OAOAST's very own "IT GIRL"... MMMMAAAAAGGIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE... NNEEEERRRRRDDLLLLLYYYYYYYYY!!!! "YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" As Maggie enters the ring, she makes her way to the center, half an eye on her sister. Maggie points her bouquet of flowers to each individual turnbuckle, a tower of green pyro exploding from each one in turn. Including the one behind Morgan, which manages to shake up the makeshift referee. COLE This is Maggie's third shot at the Women's Title in the past month and hopefully, it'll be the first without any sort out outside assistance for the champion. COACH Well we shouldn't have to worry about Abdullah getting involved, not after he got zapped like a bug by that maniac in the ref's shirt! COLE Good! NOW I'M THAT BITCH NOW I'M THAT BITCH NOW I'M THAT BITCH NOW I'M THAT BITCH As Feel Good Drag cuts into the P.A system, the stomping boots of Holly march onto the stage. Carrying her Women's Title over her shoulder, Holly scowls at the two young Nerdly sisters on her way to the ring. BUFFER And from Las Vegas, Nevada. She is the reigning and defending OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION... "THE ANGEL OF DEATH"... HHHOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYY!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Holly sets down her belt on the outside refusing to let Morgan so much as touch it. Instead an attendant takes it away, under some very forceful orders from the champion. COLE Holly was none too happy about our OAOAST President Josie Baker signing this match. Pretty obvious that the girl Holly wants to get her hands on is the one in the referee's shirt, which could pose some problems. Entering the ring Holly starts to badmouth (no surprise there!) Maggie. The two start to chat back and forth, Holly dictating the pace. Until, after about fifteen seconds, they start to get sick of talking and realise the match still hasn't started. HOLLY Ring the (bell) ya dumb (beep)ing (beep)! Jumping a little, Morgan awkwardly asks for a bell. *DINGDINGDING* Right on cue Holly surprises Maggie with a boot to the gut and starts wailing away with shots across the back. COLE And finally we're underway, Women's Title on the line and Morgan Nerdly your referee. In the midst of the beating she's taking Maggie manages to trip Holly's feet from under her and get a mount, firing away with some punches! The match turns into a scrap on the mat, champion and challenger each turning over on top and getting in a few shots. Morgan looks on and looks pretty helpless as the fight spills into the ropes, forcing a break. Sort of. COACH Come on ref, get her off of Holly! Morgan tentatively comes over and asks, ASKS, for them to break apart. But neither woman is listening, still scrapping around. COLE You know, Morgan's a former police inspector. She might want to draw on her experiences now. COACH She is. She's inspecting what's happening. She's just not doing anything about it! Finally Maggie is convinced to ease up by Morgan and the competitors end up breaking apart. As Holly gets to her feet she starts to hound Morgan ready to complain about the slow break, when Maggie surprises her with a schoolgirl... 1... Kickout! Holly and Maggie lock horns again and scrap for a second before Holly wins out, by delivering a headbutt. As Maggie staggers away Holly follows up with a clothesline and starts to stomp away in a rage. COLE The cruel and vicious Women's Champion, taking over. Dragging Maggie back up off the mat, Holly scoops her up and gives her a slam. Off the ropes comes an elbow drop and Holly makes a cover... 1... Kickout! HOLLY Pay attention, stupid (beep)! Shying away from the yelling she's getting, poor Morgan continues to hate her job as Holly stomps away some more. Maggie tries firing back, swatting at Holly's stomach with some shots. A knee dropped across her chest and pinned to her throat puts a stop to that though. Holly chokes away for a second, then jumps up to drop the knee a second time. Yelling at Morgan before the pin this time, Holly gets a quicker reaction to her cover... 1... 2... No! COLE What do you make of Morgan's counting technique, Coach? COACH You think I'm watching her arms? Holly looks annoyed and decides to toss Maggie outside, just cause. Left in the ring alone with Morgan, there's suddenly an awkward stare between champion and former champion. COLE Uh-oh. Almost daring Morgan to tell her off for throwing Maggie out of the ring, Holly hounds the reluctant referee again. Morgan shies away. So Holly, deciding to press her luck, starts pointing her finger in Morgan's chest as she berates her. Still she does nothing, so Holly gives her a light shove and laughs. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Come on! COACH Hey, if Morgan's got a problem with it, let her DQ her. COLE I don't think Morgan wants to do that, because she knows if she disqualifies Holly, that means Maggie doesn't win the title. Once she's had her fun with Morgan, Holly turns around to find Maggie back on the apron. And ducking in with a shoulder to the midsection! Holly doubles up and Maggie comes in with a sunset flip... 1... 2... No! Rolling onto her feet, Holly attempts to catch Maggie unprepared by aiming for the seated challenger's head with a stomp. Maggie manages to block the foot though and throws Holly back, allowing her to get back up. Unloading with some punches, Maggie tries for an irish whip. Holly reverses, sending Maggie into the corner, but then misses a charge and runs herself into the turnbuckles. The challenger quickly skips by, up to the middle rope. And after dishing out a little bit of RAWK she connects with a flying clothesline from the 2nd floor!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!!" COLE Nice clothesline by Maggie, not letting this special referee situation distract her. She's determined to make good tonight and finally win the Women's Title for a second time. Maggie waves Holly back to her feet. Ducking in, she goes for a northern lights suplex, only to get a knee lifted into her midsection! As Maggie collapses, Holly shoots an angry look at Morgan as she aims to inflict more pain with a standing body splash... ...but Maggie gets the knees up! COLE And now both ladies down, clutching their stomachs, as Morgan looks on... unsure of what to do. COACH When did Holly become a "lady"? COLE Good point. Both women are hurting but it's Maggie who's up first. She connects with a couple of shots and then whips Holly into a corner. As she charges in though, Maggie gets caught in a headscissors. Leant back on the top turnbuckle, Holly proceeds to flip Maggie off with both middle fingers, then lifts up one boot and SLAMS it down across the top of Maggie's head! COLE Ooh, right with the heavy heel on that combat boot! Morgan looks concerned for Maggie who is on all fours dazed. Any concern can wait though as Holly brushes Morgan aside to do some more damage. But Morgan is sure her sister is hurt and tries to get in to check on her again, leading her to eventually resort to (wo)manhandling Holly aside!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE And Morgan finally exerting her authority! Good for her! COACH Yeah, well, it ain't gonna be good for her for long! Absolutely SEETHING that Morgan would dare touch her, The Angel of Death looms over Morgan and grabs a hold of her collar, lifting her up from checking on Maggie! Holly and Morgan go face to face with Holly spitting some foul stuff at the little referee! And then, giving her a shove! "KICK HER ASS!" "KICK HER ASS!" "KICK HER ASS!" "KICK HER ASS!" Morgan, troublingly, starts to shake. Holly doesn't back down though and continues to goad Morgan... ...at which point Maggie gets back up and is quickly dropped by a boot to the chest from Holly! COLE The Women's Champion paying just about enough attention. But she needs to focus on Maggie, not Morgan. Dropping down to make the cover, Holly angrily demands that Morgan count. A little hesitant about doing it, Morgan realises she doesn't have much choice... 1... 2... Kickout! Holly drags Maggie up by the hair, looking to take her frustrations out on the other sister in the corner. Striking away, she wears Maggie down into a defensive position in the corner. Morgan looks on until she can see her sister take no more, then tries to step in. COLE Holly is really pushing her luck here. COACH She's taking advantage of the situation. COLE She's taking advantage of Morgan, is what she's doing. I think by now Holly's figured out, Morgan's not disqualifying her. After some tussling, Holly is finally dragged off by Morgan. Holly turns her attention to the diminuitive referee, who backs away, enough to save her from Holly for now. Instead Holly turns back to Maggie and goes for a charge in the corner. Which Maggie manages to avoid, catching the champion with another quick schoolgirl! 1... 2... No! Holly shuts Maggie down quickly, slamming a boot into her stomach. With two more handfuls of hair, Holly then sets up for the X-Factor... only for Maggie to throw off the hands and SCREAM REALLY FREAKIN LOUD IN HER EAR!!!! HOLLY OW, WHAT DID YOU (BEEP)IN DO THAT FOR YOU (BEEP)IN (BEEP) (BEEP)!?!? COLE Holly may be deaf... unfortunately, our censors are not. A wild swing from Holly misses the mark and starts to respond with some right hands. Irish whip sends Holly off and the resident It Girl scores with a dropkick! Holly staggers back up and gets caught with another dropkick, throwing her out of the ring through the bottom two ropes. Remembering her duties, Morgan begins to starts a 10 count. But Maggie hurries over and gets her to stop, not wanting the count-out. COACH Hey, you can't just tell the referee not to follow the rules! Shenanigans: I'm callin' them! Waiting for Holly to pick herself up, Maggie runs across the ring and scores with a third dropkick, this one from through the ropes, throwing Holly back against the barricade!! "YYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" Maggie goes out after Holly and throws the Women's Champion back inside, going for the pin... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Morgan's count has been pretty consistent so far. Have to give her that. Maggie grabs the arm and looks to put Holly away, hammerlocking her up for the HIEIYRM... you know, the DDT thing. However Holly counters by reaching out and grabbing Maggie's hair, using it to drag her down to the mat! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" As Morgan warns Holly about the hairpull, Holly turns around and lashes out, SHOVING MORGAN DOWN! COLE Hey, hey! COACH Well, Holly's had enough. Holly badmouths Morgan a little, then turns around... and gets hit with the Deoderator!! Holly grabs her side in pain as Maggie rolls over, hooking the leg... ...and wonders why there's no count. COLE Maggie's got this one won but no referee! Morgan is down. Rolling off of the champion Maggie goes over and checks on Morgan, who isn't hurt, at least not physically, but is still down from the shove. Maggie tries to help her little sis' back up, giving Holly time to recover. And despite the screams of the crowd Maggie doesn't notice until it's too late, Holly coming in from behind and catching Maggie with a dose of PERCUSSION!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE DDT! Holly capitalises with a DDT, right over Morgan. COACH Brilliant! Still holding her side Holly tries to shake it off, as she goes to pick Maggie up. Meanwhile, Morgan is up too. Quietly seething, the little referee turns around. And she makes a move towards Holly... but the Women's Champion places Maggie in between. And with a front facelock, she sinches up and delivers a SECOND Percussion DDT, this one spiking Maggie down hard! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Another DDT! And that's gonna do it, no way Maggie gets up after that. Holly looks at Morgan as she flips Maggie over, making the pin. Just about managing to hold herself back from doing something silly, Morgan stops for a second and looks down at the cover. Clearly she doesn't want to count. But, with her hand forced, Morgan sadly drops down... 1... 2... 3!!!! *DINGDINGDING* Looking as sad as anyone in the audience about the outcome, Morgan huddles up and hangs her head. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner... and STILL OAOAST WOMEN'S CHAMPION... "THE ANGEL OF DEATH" HHHHHOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYY!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Holly snatches her title belt and smirks down at Morgan. Morgan can barely look, let alone do her job of raising Holly's hand, as the Women's Champion lifts the belt up and shouts some profane I told you so's at the crowd. COLE Much as she didn't want to, Morgan had no choice but to count her sister down. And Holly is going to make her feel as bad about it as possible, of course. As she goes to leave the ring, Holly decides to rub things in a little by taking a kick at Maggie. Morgan jumps up and goes for Holly again, who quickly exits the ring and takes her title before anything more can happen. Leaving Morgan in the ring to check on her sister. COACH Way to go Morgan. Great job! COLE She did the right thing. Let's not ridicule her for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 TO THE BACK~! where BARON WINDELS lies unconscious in a pool of blood surrounded by OAOAST officials, one of whom is Tony Brannigan for those worried he may have been a budget cut. COLE We’ve got chaos backstage as Baron Windels is down. COACH Obviously he fell off his horse, Cole. COLE Now is not the time for jokes. Lame jokes at that. Our concern right now is for the welfare of Baron Windels, the victim of a sneak-attack. Tim Cash wanders in with a plate full of food. CASH (drops plate) Oh my God! Mr. Dick, wearing nothing but a towel, and Malaysia arrive on the scene as BW is loaded onto a stretcher. BRANNIGAN Where have you been? MISTER DICK I took Malaysia out for our traditional pre-match fuck. What the fuck do you mean where have I been? BRANNIGAN Uh, do you know you have a little blood on your towel? MISTER DICK Number one: why are you staring at my package? That’s more of a Cole thing. Number two: Malaysia’s on her period you insensitive fuck. Number three: I know who did this and everybody should too. In fact, I’m gonna make sure justice is served now. We follow MD and Malaysia as they barge into the dressing room of COD to find NED BLANCHARD and SIMON SINGLETON enjoying a cold one. In the background we can hear the showering running. SIMON Hey Dick, we’ve been expecting you. Wanna drink? MISTER DICK So you admit it? *laughs* (to Brannigan) What did I tell ya, guilty as sin. NED The only thing we admit is our innocence. I mean, Jesus Christ, you silly bastard, we participated in the Sunday Detention match. No way in hell we could’ve done that and then ambush Baron Windels. Besides, why the hell would we jump his ass? We like the guy. He’s a helluva drinking buddy. MISTER You damn well know why-- to help your baby’s mama in a big important match. Plus it explains your hand being taped. Ned holds up his hand, which is indeed taped. NED I hurt it fisting your mom. MISTER DICK SIMON Since we explained how we couldn’t have attacked Baron, why don’t you hit the bricks? KRISTA (off-screen) What’s all the fuss about? Krista and Alix walk out of the shower wrapped in towels. BRANNIGAN Pre-match fuck? ALIX Nope, only a shower. We’re gonna rassle Zest fully clean! KRISTA Unless Joey Greco’s walking through that door everybody better get the hell out. MALAYSIA (to MD) Come on, baby. We’ll take care of them later on in the ring. ALIX We? Um, does not compute. MISTER DICK Are ya deaf or something? The lady said “we”. Ya’ll thought you pulled a fast one, huh? *laughs* With Baron out Malaysia is gonna be my partner tonight. (throws his towel at COD) Swallow that! COLE Oh, my! OAOAST officials escort MD (bare-assed) and Malaysia out of COD’s dressing room.THE GREAT ANGLE BASH SUNDAY NIGHT, JUNE 27 LIVE ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 “Khyber Pass” shoots through the arena bringing forth boos from the Kansas City crowd. Through parted entrance doors comes the duo of Quiz and Abdullah Abir Nerdly. The Speaker For The Prophets dances around Quiz, praising him as a saint and urging the audience to do the same. Quiz simply grunts his appreciation before striding down to the ring. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of fifteen minutes! Now making his way to the ring from Calgary, Alberta, Canada, he is accompanied by Colonel Abdullah Abir Nerdly, weighing in at two hundered seventy seven pounds, he is QUUUUUUIZZZZZZZZZZZZZ! Jeers and hatred fill the air as Quiz enters the ring. His thick muscled arms find their way into the air and his large lips form into a snarl that inflames the audience’s rage. Lady Gaga’s chart topping hit “Alejandro”brings its funky, airy dance styling to Kansas City. Bumping and grinding his way out from the back is Mariachi, his pink leather tights perfectly matching the strobe lights that flicker around him. At his side is the less flamboyant but much cockier J-MAX, who throws up British gang signs to the camera. England goes hard, homie. BUFFER And the opponent….being accompanied by J-MAX he hails from Cabo San Lucas, Mexico and weighes one hundred sixty eight pounds, he is MARIAAAACHIIIII! “YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Mariachi bumps and grinds the guardrails, bringing a festive sexual atmosphere to the audience. The fans dance along with him, enjoying his fun loving personality. For his part, J-MAX plays to the audience with his gang signs and hand slapping. COLE Mariachi is out to avenge his partner, Moracca, who’s career was ended at the hands of Quiz, who threw him through the window of The Heavenly Rockers tour bus! Mariachi hits the ring, but engages in none of his usual theatrics, thanks to an intimidating stare and harsh threats from Quiz. COLE Quiz took a surprising loss to J-MAX this past HeldDOWN as Mariachi distracted the big Calgary native, allowing J-MAX to get the winning pinfall. COACH Mariachi has frustrated the hell out of the rookie, its time for payback. DING DING DING Quiz steps into Mariachi for a lockup, but the clever luchadore slides between his legs. With Quiz confused, Mariachi pinches him in the BUTT! QUIZ What the hell is this aboot?! Quiz swings around with a fist aimed for Mariachi’s skull. But Mariachi ducks it and instead takes Quiz down to the canvas with double leg takedown. Mariachi then infuriates Quiz all the more by mounting him, and humping him missionary style. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COACH This is how you avenge your fallen partner? By dry humping the dude that threw him through a window? Quiz manages to succeed in shoving Mariachi off him. He roars back to his feet and aims a lariat at Mariachi. Its countered by a drop toe hold that causes Quiz to smash his face against the canvas. Ever the kind one, Mariachi soothes his anger by LICKING HIM! COLE Mariachi is just too much! COACH And too gay, and too annoying, and too much of a jackass. Furious, the muscle bound Quiz shoots to his feet. But he can effort no attack as Mariachi hurricanranas him to the canvas. Quiz attempts to make another return to his feet and gets hurricanraned once more for his trouble. Mariachi then leaps onto the second rope and springboards back with a leg drop onto Quiz’s throat. The first pinfall attempt of the contest is then made…. ONE! Quiz makes an easy kickout. Breathing heavily he comes back to his feet to be Irish whipped to the corner. Mariachi cartwheels towards his position, and then strikes him in the jaw with an elbow. Dazed by the blow, Quiz staggers out the corner. This allows Mariachi to take up position on the top turnbuckle. He waits patiently for Quiz to turn around, and when he does Mariachi pounces with a third hurricanrana! Clem Buzzlefoxer counts the ensuing pinfall… ONE! TWO! Quiz kicks out, albeit with a little more difficulty than last time. He comes to his feet and gets jammed in the stomach with a boot. Mariachi then rushes to the ropes, but has his foot grabbed by Abdullah Abir Nerdly. This draws the attention of J-MAX but Abdullah starts coppin’ pleas like a bitch nigga. ABDULLAH My child I only wished to serve him with the daily affirmations of our lord! Please forgive my eagerness! Mariachi turns around from the commotion and steps right into a lariat from Quiz. COLE Look at that power from the big Canadian! The Calgary native scoops Mariachi off the mat in order to tag him with pair of right crosses. He then hooks him into a front facelock and brings him to the canvas with a vertical suplex. This earns hearty applause from Colonel Abdullah who encourages Quiz to pound his foe in the name of Allah. Quiz does just that, stomping away at Mariachi until deciding to attempt a cruel choke instead. COACH Mikey, imagine having that guy’s hand wrapped around your neck. COLE How is Mariachi even breathing? Quiz is forced to break up his choking session by an adamant Buzzlefoxer. Sighing to himself over the enforcement of the rules, Quiz brings Mariachi up by his mask. He throws him into the corner where he pelts the Mexican with powerful punches to the stomach. As Mariachi wilts under the attack, J-MAX tries to rally the crowd to get behind his friend… “HOMIES! HOMIES! HOMIES!” COACH There’s only one homie now and that homie is getting his homo ass kicked. Quiz begins choking Mariachi with the underside of his boot. This causes great distress to the luchadore who gags in anguish. Fortunately for him, Quiz is forced to break the hold before he can suffocate his opponent. But this doesn’t end the terrible punishment. Quiz begins driving his massive shoulders into Mariachi’s thin midsection. Several attacks land before Mariachi stuns Quiz with a roll up pin attempt… ONE! TWO! Quiz fights his way out the pin. Seething with anger, he jumps up with the intention of taking Mariachi’s head off. But Mariachi counters such an attempt with an arm drag. And another! And a third one sends Quiz succrying out the ring into the waiting arms of Abdullah. “QUIZ IS A PUSSY! QUIZ IS A PUSSY! QUIZ IS A PUSSY!” the fans berate the large Canadian rookie. Quiz pulls away from Abdullah, walking around the outside mats with hands finding hips in frustration. Suddenly he lashes out and strikes J-MAX with a big boot! J-MAX crumbles into a heap of flesh and bones, brutalized by the attack. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE That was just uncalled for! Quiz had no business assailing J-MAX. COACH J-MAX shouldn’t even be out here. He has no manager’s license. Ol have to press caps lock everytime you wanna type his name ass nigga. I hate him. Apparently Mariachi agrees with Cole’s assement, as he slips his legs through the ropes to kick Quiz in the face. Hurt, Quiz goes staggering backwards and finds a landing place against the guardrails. Mariachi then takes flight and topples his much bigger foe with a corckscrew plancha! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” ABDULLAH You fools! Do you not know the bastion of sin you cheer for?! Mariachi reaches his feet and celebrates by kissing a male fan on the nose! COACH Rape! Mariachi grabs hold of Quiz’ tree trunk sized arm and uses it to irish whip him into the stairs. The steel casings come lose, tumbling off to the ground. Mariachi then rushes forward and strikes his opponent in the head with a dropkick! He then decides Quiz had been a bad boy and starts spanking him! COACH Rape part two! Mariachi painstakingly rolls Quiz back into the ring so that he may pin the native of Calgary…. ONE! TWO! Abdullah puts Quiz’s boot on the ropes, earning himself heat from the sold out audience. Not noticing the interfernce, Mariachi runs the ropes. He returns right as Quiz stands to strike at his foe with a crossbody block. But Quiz catches Mariachi and slams him forward with a fall forward slam. He then grabs onto Quiz’s leg for the pinfall… ONE! TWO! Mariachi lifts his shoulder off the canvas mere seconds away from a three count. He starts to come to his feet but eats elbow strikes from Quiz. The Rockers bodyguard then whips his smaller foe into the ropes. Mariachi ducks a big boot, and leaps onto the third rope to spring board back with another cross body block. But Quiz punches him out the air and Mariachi suffers a horrible crash landing as a result. Quiz smiles to himself as he makes a pinfall effort… ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! COACH Quiz laid into that dude, Mikey. You know Mariachi’s gotta be feeling pretty sore right now. COLE It was a hard shot by the big man from Calgary. Quiz scoops Mariachi up into position for a pump handle slam! But as he lifts Mariachi up, the luchadore slips down Quiz’s back. Before Quiz can even recognize what’s happened, he’s being dropkicked in the back. He stumbles into the corner where Mariachi strikes is back with a second dropkick. Wounded, Quiz staggers backwards and finds himself school boyed into a pin! ONE! TWO! ABDULLAH THROWS THE KORAN AT CLEM! Fortunately for the death-cheating referee, Abdullah has lousy aim. But this heinous action is enough to draw the anger of a recovered J-MAX. The masked Brit rushes forward and spears Abdullah to the ground! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COACH His holiness! COLE There’s nothing holy about that shady trickster. Mariachi climbs to the top rope, and flies forward to roll Quiz into a sunset flip. But Quiz refuses to go down, and Mariachi hasn’t the strength to drag the hulking monster to the canvas. Thus Quiz lays his hands around Mariachi’s neck and begins lifting him into the air. COLE This doesn’t look good for Mariachi! But Mariachi counters with a ddt! A cover is then made, and Buzzlefoxer slides into position to count the fall… ONE TWO! Quiz powers out the pinfall. He slaps the canvas in frustration, and then rises to his feet. Now upright he swings at Mariachi with menacing fury. But Mariachi ducks the attack and begins kicking Quiz in the leg. He then arm wrenches Quiz and hops onto the third rope. His legs find their way around Quiz’s neck for a hurricanrana. But Quiz counters by surging forward and throwing Mariachi down with a running powerbomb! COLE Pop Quiz! “OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH” The referee counts the resulting pinfall…. ONE! TWO! THREE! DING DING DING BUFFER Your winner as a result of a pinfall…..QUUUUUUUUUUUUIIIIIIZZZZZZZ Quiz throws up his arms in grand triumph as the crowd douses him with their disgust and disappointment. Abdullah enters the ring, and quotes from his holy book, dedicating is sermon to the enthused victor. Meanwhile, J-MAX pulls Mariachi out the ring and tries to call him back to life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 Please allow me to introduce myself I'm a man of wealth and taste I've been around for a long, long year Stole many a man's soul and faith And I was 'round when Jesus Christ Had his moment of doubt and pain Made damn sure that Pilate Washed his hands and sealed his fate With Guns N Roses’ cover of Sympathy For The Devil comes the ubiquitous(I hate that word) green and yellow spotlights and a downpour of cold hard cash. Into this amazing scene steps the trio of the snobbish Christian Wright, the egomaniacal Theodore Moneymaker and the gorgeous Lorelei DeCenzo. Moneymaker flashes his infamous money fingers as Christian Wright welcomes the drizzle of cash with open arms. Lorelei twirls around to showchase her sexy white halter dress outfit. COLE The God Child Christian Wright, and The Devil Himself Theodore Moneymaker. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen the following six person contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of thirty minutes! Now making their way to the ring, first from Manhattan Beach, California, she is THE MONEY HONEY LORELEI DECENZO, and from Washington DC, THE GOD CHILD CHRISTIAN WRIGHT, and their leader, from Vero Beach, Florida, he is The Enterprise CEO and a former world heavyweight champion he is THE DEVIL HIMSELF THEODORE MONEYMAAAAKKEERRRR! Together they are THE ENTERPISSEEEEEEEEEEEEE! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”Pleased to meet you Hope you guess my name, oh yeah Ah, what's puzzling you Is the nature of my game, oh yeah Lorelei gracefully struts up the ring steps, and earns her paycheck by holding open the ropes for Wright and Moneymaker. Inside the ring the three join hands and lift their arms into the air in celebration of their greatness and their vast wealth. COLE Well, this match is a rematch of sorts from Motor City Spectacular. Things between The Enterprise and D*LUX have been tense ever since Christian injured Shayne’s eye, and they’ve only gotten worse after that debacle of a date this past HeldDOWN~! COACH Debacle? That was great, that was a Jerry Springer worthy ass whupping. Shayne needs to go to the line and shoot two because that shit was flagrant! I loved it!WELL ITS MIDNIGHT AND ITS COLDER PULL YOU CLOSER I CAN SEE THROUGH WHEN ITS SUNSHINE AND ITS SOLAR AND ITS OVER GUESS ITS ME AND YOU BLOOD. BY. SUN. LIGHT. Huge cheers greet Lupe Fiasco’s “Solar Midnite” as D*LUX rushes onto the entrance stage! The boys trek a speedy path across the steel flooring, working up the crowd and firing themselves up for the upcoming contest. Clad in her cheerleader outfit, Jade meekly walks onto stage, overshadowed by her little sister Maya’s leaping and exuberant jumping routine. BUFFER And the opponents, hailing from Detroit, Michigan……accompanied to the ring by MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD, they are LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN, SHOWTIME “SHAYNE”, TREMENDOUS “TYLER”….D*LUUUUUUUUUUXXXXXXXXXXXXXX! The girls rush to the forefront of the stands as D*LUX hand slaps their way down the asile. Shayne is only moderately interested in the show of goodwill, instead keeping fierce eyes locked on The Enterprise. COACH How Krista gonna have two kids by two different men and claim to be a modern feminist? That’s hood rat status, b. COLE I’m going to disassociate myself from you for my own safety. Folks, the rules of this contest are simple the men can wrestle the men and Lorelei and Jade can only wrestle each other. DING DING DING Lorelei circles Jade, fluffing her hair and happily skipping around the peeved cheerleader. Jade can’t control her anger for very long, and lunges at Lorelei. But The Money Honey avoids her dive and manages to grab her into a rear waistlock. She then uses her power to throw Jade down to the canvas in one swift motion. Pleased with that attack, she fluffs her hair once more. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” MAYA Hey, if I had hair extensions that nice I’d fluff my hair to! LORELEI Hair extensions? You little brat, I should come out there and WOOOOOOAH! Jade’s rolled up Lorelei into a pinfall that’s counted by referee Clem Buzzlefoxer! ONE! TWO! Lorelei pops out the pin. She rises to her feet and meets Jade with a lariat. But Jade ducks bellow the strike, and now its her grabbing a rear waistlock. The attractive cheerleader then wheels to the side and takes Lorelei down to the canvas. From there she moves forward and captures her foe into a sideheadlock. MAYA Alright, everyone give it up for the simplest of wrestling moves! JADE I’d like to see you do what I’m doing! MAYA I’d like to see you not have smaller breasts than me when I’m years younger! That shuts Jade up, but pisses her off enough that she violently wrenches on Lorelei’s neck. Though the hold is painful, its not enough to stop Lorelei from pushing her way off the canvas. Now upright, Lorelei shoves Jade into the ropes. Jade bounces back with a shoulder block, that fails to floor Lorelei and only pushes her back mere inches. Jade isn’t exactly put off by her failure and instead retries her efforts. This time Lorelei flourishes forward and connects with a lariat! COLE Big time move! Lorelei gets in touch with her sensual side as she grinds her slender hips and runs her hands through her raven colored hair. while making a sexy pouting face to D*LUX. That earns a begrudging cheer from the audience that’s tempered when Lorelei mounts Jade and begins raining down punches on her skill. After receiving a warning about a closed fist, a frustrated Lorelei applies the tag to Christian Wright. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COACH The unbeatable man! With Wright entering the ring, Jade is forced out, and Tyler takes her place. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Tyler comes screaming across the ring with leg raised for a yakuza kick. But Wright has seen his arrival and merely sidesteps the speedy attack. Having come up short, Tyler whips around but is met with a series of European Uppercuts. Wright then grabs onto his arm and shoots him into the ropes. But as Bryant comes back he puts himself on the offensive and attacks CW with a phantom neckbreaker! COLE Wicked neckbreaker by Tyler Bryant! Tyler hops on his feet, waiting impatiently for CW’s rise. When The God Child comes to his feet, Tyler sezies upon him with a front facelock. The two men engage in a struggle over the hold that’s won by CW as he shoves Tyler into the ropes nearest D*LUX’s corner. A blind tag is promptly made by Shayne Brave. MAYA Why is it called a blind tag? I saw it, you saw it, the people at home saw it, the people in the stands saw it. Stevie Wonder could’ve seen it! COLE She takes after her mother more and more everyday. Shayne springboards into the ring with a lariat that wipes out CW! The fans cheer loudly, as CW groans in miserey. Brave isn’t all too sympathetic to his plight and brings him to his feet. He softens The God Child up with a pair of elbows to the stomach before trapping him inside a front facelock. Brave then leaps in the air and swings around to connect with a tornado DDT! “WE LOVE SHAYNE! WE LOVE SHAYNE! WE LOVE SHAYNE!” Christian Wright’s feelings border on the opposite as he’s hit with an elbow drop and promptly pinned… ONE! TWO! Wright manages to throw up his shoulder to escape the pinfall. COACH The God Child can’t be defeated! Why even bother to pin him? Why waste your time with a pointless exercise? The Centennial Man slowly comes to his feet, hampered by a groggy head. He’s tagged in the jaw with an uppercut, and left dazed as Brave runs the ropes. But Showtime put himself too close to Theodore Moneymaker, and the Billion Dollar Heir swats him in the back of the head. The is crowd is angered, as is Brave. He turns around to deal with Moneymaker and is soon hit in the back with a running double knee strike. With an opponent down and ripe for the kill, Moneymaker eagerly tags in. COLE Look who’s finally getting his hands dirty. Its become a rare “treat” to see him in the ring. COACH Mister Moneymaker pays good money to Christian, Spencer, and Colin, why not sit back and gain a return on your investment? Moneymaker stomps away at Showtime, leaving him distressed and wounded. His condition continues to worsen as the Flordia native chokes him with the bottom ropes. Teenage girls in the audience wince as they watch their crush be punished in such a cruel manner. COLE What a disgusting act by a disgusting individual. COLE Your talking about a billionaire, you ain’t gotta like the man, but you gotta love his cash. Moneymaker grabs onto Shayne’s moppy hair and brings him off the canvas. He wrenches on the boy’s arm before quickly moving into a side headlock. Shayne’s neck is ripped and cranked by the smiling tycoon, who makes kissey faces at Maya. MAYA I think my every last hormone just went up in a blaze! The Devil Himself swings behind Shayne to capture his arm in a hammerlock. He then pushes the boybander down, and roughly throws him into the ring posts. Shayne hollers out in pain, as Moneymaker laughes over the damage he’s wrought. MONEYMAKER Money talks, bullshit walks! MAYA How does that even relate to the situation at hand? Preferring not to answer that question, the former world champion pulls Shayne out the corner and into The Enterprise’s. There he applies the tag to Christian Wright, who enters the ring with nose held high into the air. He first lays in several kicks to Shayne’s injured arm, his loafers doing extreme damage. Next, he grabs Shayne into an arm wrench, causing moans of agony to seep out the Detroiter’s mouth. Wright follows that up by leaping over the top rope and crashing Shayne’s arm against the cable! Brave falls backwards, his arm clutched to his chest. WRIGHT Where is your l’chaim now? CROWD Our what? WRIGHT Nevermind. Annoyed with the ignorant audience, The God Child slides into the squared circle. However, Brave isn’t the weak foe he left. Now standing, Brave uses his good arm to wing knife edge chops against Wright’s chest. But The God Child t is able to cut short the flurry of attacks with a devastating European Uppercut! Brave staggers away, his arm and his chest burning with intense pain. Wright then grabs onto Brave’s arm and slams it against his knee. COLE Shayne Brave has got to find someway to protect his arm or more preferably make the tag to one of his partners. Wright weakens his foe with more European Uppercuts before taking off to the ropes. But as he returns to Brave, the boybander leaps into the air and strikes him in the face with a Leg Lariat! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans delight as Wright rolls onto his stomach to shield his face. Increasing their cheers is the fact that he applies the tag with Jade Rodez-Duncan! MAYA People with hyphenated last names rule! Lorelei enters the ring in a rather leg revealing way, even wiggling her BUTT for old man Clem. Jade hasn’t much patience for Lorelei’s time wasting and runs over to attack the dark haired beauty. But Lorelei fends her away with forearm strikes. Jade is hobbled and her arm is trapped by The Dollar Doll. After tossing a kiss to Shayne, Lorelei executes a brutal neckbreaker that leaves Jade whimpering in anguish. COLE E-commercide! Lorelei taunts Jade by digging a grave above her, an action that does not endear her to the sold out audience. Once finished with her cruel behavior, Lorelei drops a leg across Jade’s neck. A pinfall then follows… ONE! TWO! Jade makes the kickout! “JADE! JADE! JADE!” the fans bleat. Lorelei grabs onto the back of Jade’s cheerleader top and roughly pulls her off the canvas. She gives her few insulting slaps in the face and then sets her up for an Urange. COLE Lorelei is looking for that Urange into a Gutbuster. COACH Good, knock off some of that baby fat Jade’s got. But Jade uses her elbows to swat away Lorelei. Angered with Jade’s escape, Lorelei fires off a right hand. But Jade uses her forearm to block it! A right jab finds its way to Lorelei’s face and a left jab does the same. Jade twirls around, and shoots her arm forward to level The Money Honey with a lariat. MAYA Exclusive: Rich Little Blonde Girl Kicks Ass! Get your copy today! I ain’t selling crack, I’m selling news papers! Jade dives on top of Lorelei for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Christian breaks up the pinfall with a boot to the head! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” COLE Totally uncalled for! Tyler and Shayne feel the same way and enter the ring to come to their girl’s aid. Clem holds Shayne back, but he can’t fend off Tyler, who tackles CW to the ground. He mounts The God Child and begins raining down powerful punches. COLE Get ‘em, Tyler! And you look good doing it! Go on, boyfriend! But Tyler’s relentless assault is ground to a halt by Lorelei digging her nails into his eyes. He screams in pain, fearful that his eyes may well be dug out his skull. But before that miserable fate can happen, Jade pulls Lorelei away. While Clem ushes the illegal men out the ring, Jade backs Lori into the corner with forearms. She then backs to the center of the ring, and performs a little cheerleading dance. After that she surges forward, seeking to strike Lorelei with a corner splash! But Lorelei moves out the way and Jade crashes into the corner posts. “OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH” Things go from bad to worse for Jade as Lorelei grabs onto the ropes and proceeds to give her the Tramp Stamp (shoulder blocks to the lower back). Jade whimpers out her distress, looking to her sister for help. Maya needn’t be asked twice, as she jumps onto the ring apron. MAYA Look at me I’m on the ring apron, yelling, and shouting, and dancing, and screaming, and distracting you! LORELEI Get down from there, brat, before I take you down myself! MAYA LALALALALALA I’M ON THE RING APRON LALALALALALALA LEE LEE LEE! Lorelei is drug down into a rollup from Little Miss California! ONE! TWO! Lorelei gets her shoulder up at the last possible moment. COLE That was a brilliant distraction by Maya. COACH How can you condone her jumping on the ring apron and screaming like a loon! If Colin had come out here and done something like that you’d have a bitch fit. Jade drags herself to her corner and applies the tag with Tyler! This draws a vexed Moneymaker into the ring, and he doesn’t exactly have his heart into fighting. This becomes more than a small problem for him as Tyler slams a running dropkick into his face! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” The Devil Himself comes to his feet, fuming with vicious anger. Unfortunately he can find no way to sate his rage as Tyler backs him into the corner with overhand rights. After landing several more shots, Bryant attempts to whip Moneymaker across the ropes. But Moneymaker reverses the hold and pulls Bryant in close for a knee strike. He then grabs onto his neck and twists him around for a neckbreaker! He follows that with a fistful of dollars that enrages the crowd. They’re left to hold their breath as Moneymaker makes a pinfall…. ONE! TWO! Tyler pushes his way out the pinfall, pleasing the sold out audience. Less pleased is Moneymaker who pulls Bryant to his feet and gives him a pair of knees to the gut. Bryant is hobbled over, which permits Moneymaker to strike him in the throat with a nasty punch. COLE That was a borderline illegal move. Some referees might not have allowed it. COACH But Clem did and Mister Moneymaker is in control. The Billion Dollar Heir stomps at Tyler’s head, his gold boots seeking to crack the teenybopper’s skull wide open. His next action may have more success to that end, as he bashes Bryant’s skull with a Billion Dollar Knee Drop! COACH Mister Moneymaker is in rare form! COLE Because he jumped in the air and landed his knee on Tyler’s head? That’s what counts as rare form? The Devil Himself brings CW into the ring, with stern orders to “finish the job”. Wright does his best to follow orders as he brings Tyler off the canvas. Bryant is thrown into the ropes, and when he returns he’s caught inside a sleeper hold by The God Child. Bryant refuses to be submitted though and immediately begins firing elbows into Wright’s midsection. This forces Wright to shift his strategy. His new tactics find much more success than his old one as he’s able to hit a swinging neckbreaker on Bryant. A pinall then follows…. ONE! TWO! Kickout! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” A tag is made to Theodore Moneymaker, and the fans’ cheers quickly turn to jeers. Moneymaker does little to improve their mood as he enters with stomps to Tyler’s sore neck. Giving Tyler little time to recover, Moneymaker pulls him upright and shoves him into the corner. There he leans into his foe and chokes him, much to the fans’ and Maya’s chagrin! COLE The Enterprise has certainly taken a liberal interpretation of the rules tonight. The former world champion finally releases Tyler, showing him to be a hacking and wheezing wreck. The Billion Dollar Heir fires off several left hands, before twisting Bryant into another neckbreaker. “LET’S GO TYLER! LET’S GO TYLER! LET’S GO TYLER!” WRIGHT SILENCE! Moneymaker leaves Wright to deal with the churlish audience, and focuses his attention on Bryant. He hooks the youngster into a front facelock, and wastes no time in lifting him into the air. COLE Spear of Longinus? COACH That’s the spear that killed Christ, and its damn sure gonna kill Tyler Bryant! Apparently Tyler>>>Jesus as The Tremendous One counters the signature attack into a DDT~! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Nursing a sore neck, Bryant attempts to crawl towards his corner. But his foot is clamped onto by a desperate Theodore Moneymaker. Tyler fights to his feet, however the hold remains, and Moneymaker is quickly regaining his strength. MAYA Teddy! Look a penny! MONEYMAKER A penny?! Where?! Where?! I want! Poor Mister Moneymaker. For there is no penny. There is only the enziguri that cracks his skull! As the audience celebrates, Moneymaker teeters over to the canvas and comes down in a pained heap. This permits Tyler to make the tag to Jade Rodez-Duncan! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Instead of getting Lorelei as expected, Jade gets a frowning Christian Wright, who dares her to challenge his unbeaten streak. COLE Get him out of here! Tough like her mother, Jade puts up her hands, ready to test skills against the unbeatable superstar. But thankfully she won’t have to face that insurmountable challenge as Shayne leaps over her and wipes out Wright with top rope lariat! COLE Alright! Shayne kips up and rallies the audience with a fist pump as CW tries to come to terms with what just happened. He slowly pulls himself off the canvas, but is caught by the side by Brave. Showtime lifts him up and then slams him onto his knees for a backbreaker. As Shayne holds him in place, Jade is able to elevate to the second rope. She poses like the cheerleader at the top of a pyramid to garner a grand reaction from the fans, before flying off with an elbow drop onto Wright’s face! COACH That’s not fair! Its supposed to be women vs women and men vs men! COLE Wright’s the one who wanted a piece of Jade in the first place. Moneymaker gathers up his strength and wits and pushes himself off the ropes with a lariat aimed for Brave. But Jade drops to the ground, and an unaware Moneymaker trips right over her! The fans share a tickled laugh as the billionaire takes an embarrassing face first dive to the canvas. While he struggles to get back to his feet, Brave climbs to the top rope. He singals to the audience, and they come to their feet expecting a superb high risk attack. But what they get is disaster as Shayne misses his picture perfect elbow drop! His crash is a painful one, causing the girls in the audience to scream out in fear for his safety. Noticeably less concerned is The Devil Himself, who quickly hooks the leg for the pin… ONE! TWO! Tyler yanks The Enterprise CEO off his opponent. Moneymaker quickly comes to his feet, and the two enagage in fisticuffs! I love that word. The brawling ability of Moneymaker gains the upper hand as he’s able to pound Bryant into the corner. He makes his infamous money fingers gesture and then situates Bryant atop the turnbuckle. Following his foe atop the posts, Moneymaker has several words for Maya. Ignoring her blowback, the Florida native hooks the Detroiter into a front facelock. COLE Could we be seeing a superplex? Moneymaker falls backwards, throwing Bryant through the air, and landing him on the canvas with the devastating top rope move. Moneymaker then speedily floats over into a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Jade breaks the pinfall up! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” This highly annoys Lorelei, and she lunges forward to tackle Jade down to the ground. COACH Catfight! It isn’t much of a fight though as Jade somehow manages to gain the upperhand on her larger opponent. Little Miss California wrenches and tugs on Lorelei’s hair, and eventually pulls out a hair extension! MAYA I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! Elsewhere, Tyler and Wright do battle in the center of the ring. Bryant gains the upperhand with well placed kicks to Wright’s ribs. Because of this he’s able to take The God Child onto his shoulders in set up for the Idoloizer (TKO)! COLE A big move is coming up! Not if Lorelei can help it, she executes a low blow that hobbles Shayne and forces him to release CW. Now free, Wright wastes little time in punishing his foe; he takes him into the skies and throws him forward with a gordbuster! COLE Someone call The Wall Street Journal because the Stockmarket Crashed! Wright makes the pinfall…. ONE! TWO! Jade breaks up the fall once more! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” There’s zero cheers for Lorelei who rips Jade up by her golden hair and guides her into a front facelock. She hooks onto Jade’s legs in set up for the Cash Flow (fisherman’s DDT)! But Jade manages to fight out! Incensed, Lorelei whirls around with a lariat. But Jade ducks it and comes up behind The Dollar Doll. Her hands clamp under Lorelei’s chin and from there she sits out with a reverse x-factor! COLE Got if from her mama! Krista would be proud! Maya goes wild on the outside, as Jade reaches forward and hooks the leg for a pin… ONE! TWO! THREE!!!! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans come to their feet to celebrate the good guys’ achievement. BUFFER Your winner as a result of a pinfall….D*LUX AND JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN! COLE For all their money and all their schemes The Enterprise could not overcome the talent and unity of these four superstars. Maya performs the you can’t see me hand gesture to a fuming Teddy. A gesture that’s sure to land her in hot water with her mother! Meanwhile, Tyler, Shayne and Jade high five in the center of the ring, then go to the top turnbuckles to pump up the exuberant audience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted April 1, 2013 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 COLE Well, fans, it‘s time for our main event. One nobody expected until about an hour ago when it was announced Malaysia would take the place of Baron Windels after he was violently attacked backstage. We still don’t know who the perpetrator was. COACH Of course we do. Ned Blanchard. We’ve seen the blow ups on TV between the Orange County Cobras and Lone Star Gunslingers. And who’d benefit the most if Baron was taken out of the picture? The Orange County Cobras and COD. Alix and Krista become the new champs, then turn around and give Simon and Ned the first title shot. Plus it gets Ned back in Krista’s good graces after years of hostility. COLE As much as I hate to admit it, everything you said makes perfect sense. Ned certainly has the motive and the balls to do something that extreme. I-I just don’t know what to think. COACH We live in a crazy world. That’s all you need to know. * DING * DING * DING * DING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, this is your main event for School’s Out: Class of 2010. And it’s for THE ONE & ONLY TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE WORLD! Are you ready? “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” BUFFER OAOAST Galaxy, ARE… YOU… READY? "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BUFFER Then for the thousands in attendance and the millions watching around the world… Ladies and gentlemen… LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLET'S GET READY TO RRRRRRRRRRRUMMMMMMBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! “Girlfriend” by Avril Lavigne cues and COD get their big intro I’m too lazy to look up/write. BUFFER Introducing first, the challengers who tonight look to regain the titles they lost just 1 month ago. From the City of Angels, here are America’s Sweethearts… KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN and ALIX MARIA SPEZIA… CHICKS OOOOVVVEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKKSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BUFFER And their opponents. First, substituting for the injured Baron Windels, she is a former OAOAST Women’s Champion and the ultimate combination of beauty and beat downs… MMMMAAALLLLLLAAAAAYYYYYSIA!! Her partner hails from San Antonio, Texas, and is the reigning OAOAST heavyweight champion of the world… MISSSSSTERRRRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!!! *boo* "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" *boo* Krista paces frantically as MD takes a seat in the corner and waits for Malaysia to crawl over to him. Once Malaysia snags the title hung out of MD’s short shorts with her teeth Alix leapfrogs her to BRONCO BUSTER MD! COLE How’s that for a Youtube Moment? * DINGDINGDING * Alix throws her hands in the air and waves them like she just doesn’t care in celebration. Suddenly she’s grabbed from behind by Malaysia and swung around like a rag doll. Quick to her aid is Krista, who snaps Malaysia straight back with a REVERSE X-FACTOR! COLE Elizabeth, I'm coming to join ya, honey. Its the big one! COACH Oh no! Already? The cover. ONE! TWO! THR-- NO!! SAVE BY MD! MD puts the boots to Krista until being clobbered by Alix. COD whip MD into the ropes for a double BAAAAAACK body drop, then both seductively grind their bodies together before Krista delivers a double stomp to the face while Alix double stomps the midsection. COLE A new twist to an old classic: a double grind and double stomp. COACH What is this, the U.S. border? There’s a whole bunch of illegal activity going on in the ring. Krista steps on MD’s pubes on her way over to Malaysia, only to get leveled by a vicious clothesline. COACH You know Malaysia took exception to Krista’s last move. Nobody stomps on Dick’s pubes but her. MD receives the tag and takes a page out of Krista’s baby’s daddy playbook as he STOMPS A MUDHOLE AND WALKS IT DRY! COLE What a slap in the face that is. MD snap mares Krista out of the corner and returns the pube stomping from moments ago, then shoves Alix to bait her inside while he and Malaysia do a number on Krista. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Following an illegal switch Malaysia executes a butterfly suplex and makes the cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Krista reverses a whip and leapfrogs Malaysia, who turns around only to walk into an inverted atomic drop and then get nailed with a super kick! COLE You can bet Malaysia will never forget Krista's Great California Adventure. MD charges in and gets hip tossed. COD tag and hit a double dropkick that knocks MD outside. Their attention turns to Malaysia who runs through a double clothesline and decks COD with one of her own. COACH That’ll teach COD not to break the rules with their constant illegal double-teaming. Alix is scooped up and rammed hard into the corner, followed by a series of shoulder thrusts. Malaysia sits Alix on the top rope and delivers a FALLAWAY SLAM! The cover. ONE! TWO! SAVE BY KRISTA! Malaysia tags MD and he performs a MILITARY PRESS SLAM. The cover. ONE! TWO! NO! With a shit eating grin on his face MD lifts Alix’s head off the mat and near his crotch. COLE Is that really called for? COACH Do you know how many chicks would kill to be in Alix’s position right now? Hell, you’re probably green with envy yourself. COLE MD whips Alix in for a second press slam only to be stunned by a springboard spear STRAIGHT OUT OF COMPTON! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" COD tag and Krista unloads on MD. Following a backdrop Krista hits MD with THE HEBREW HAMMER! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! MD begs off in the corner but Krista shows no mercy applying a TESTICULAR CLAW! MISTER DICK COLE Blue Ball Special~! Malaysia enters and gets placed in the claw as well, much to her pleasure. COACH She likes it. She really likes it. Krista squeezes harder and MD experiences double the pain as Malaysia twists his nipples! COLE Needless to say, Mr. Dick isn’t enjoying himself right now. Not to be left out, Alix twists MD’s other nipple. But if three’s a crowd, four’s a nuisance so Malaysia lays out both members of COD. COACH Aw, it just was getting good. After a quick rubdown on his balls and nipples, MD rams Krista into the buckle. Sharpe right jabs follow and then Krista is whipped across, but she avoids a corner splash and tags out. COLE Here comes Alix. Alix monkey flips MD out of the corner and then a funky new move, a HANDSPRING MOONSAULT! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Alix sends MD for the ride but telegraphs a backdrop and gets drilled with a bulldog leg drop. COACH The ATM~! COLE Let’s not go down that cavity again. The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" MD complains of a slow count which the ref has none of. Following a tag MD and Malaysia try to double suplex Alix, but she stomps on their feet and drives both their canvas into the mat! COACH Dirty fighter! Malaysia reverses a whip, but Alix springboards off the top rope and back at Malaysia who delivers a YAKUZA KICK TO THE CHEST!! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” The cover. ONE! TWO! THR-- NO, KICKOUT! COLE She kicked out! Alix kicked out! COACH I’m speechless, Cole. I thought she was out for sure. Malaysia viciously applies a neck vice which she turns into an inverted Boston crab. “LET’S GO ALIX!” *clap*clap*clap*clap*clap* “LET’S GO ALIX!” *clap*clap*clap*clap*clap* “LET’S GO ALIX!” *clap*clap*clap*clap*clap* The encouragement from Krista and the OAOAST Galaxy only serves to anger Malaysia. And poor Alix is the one who experiences her wrath via THE BODY RACK! COACH If I were Alix I’d quit right now, Cole. She’s getting killed in there. COLE If you were Alix you’d be one ugly looking woman. Unable to get Alix to scream uncle, Malaysia tries to turn the rack into a POWERBOMB, but little do people know Alix has a goldfish named Kidman… AND YOU CAN’T POWERBOMB KIDMAN! COLE Facebuster! MD distracts the ref as Alix tags Krista. Needless to say Krista becomes irate when the tag is disallowed. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH The people can boo all they want, but even you gotta admit the ref made the right call. COLE I would if he hadn’t allowed Malaysia in after she and Mr. Dick switched illegally. Unfortunately officiating is just as bad in wrestling as it is in football and basketball. All you want is consistency. Malaysia tosses Alix outside as the ref escorts Krista back to the corner and MD drops Alix throat-first on the guardrail. He dumps her back in and receives the tag, then executes THE COCK BLOCK! The cover. ONE! TWO! SAVE BY KRISTA! MD and Krista have a heated argument while Malaysia’s attempt to ram Alix into the ring post backfires and she’s the one who meets the cold steel. "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" MD greets Alix near the apron and takes a shoulder to the gut. Alix swings over the top but cannot complete the sunset flip as MD drops down and flexes his muscles. ONE! TWO! NO! Alix hooks MD’s arms with her legs and takes him over. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Alix ducks a clothesline and gets drilled with a knee to the spine by Malaysia. A tag is made and Malaysia looks to humble Alix with THE CAMEL CLUTCH. “ALIX!” “ALIX!” “ALIX!” The OAOAST Galaxy rallies behind Alix as she tries to rise up, but Malaysia is quick to sit back down hard on her. Alix repeats the move again to the same results. On the third attempt she rolls onto her back and crotches Malaysia with her shins! COACH What did I tell you, Cole? She’s a dirty fighter! COLE Alix doing anything she can to survive. MD screams at Malaysia to get up and stop Alix from tagging, but with Malaysia still hurting from the previous blow he’s forced to take matters into his own hands. Alix spots MD and dives towards her corner to make the tag! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" MD meets Krista head on and gets the worse of an exchange with her. Krista whips MD and Malaysia into each other and then gives them a DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER which knocks them both loopy long enough for her to deliver a TOP ROPE FLYING CROSSBODY! The count. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! COACH What a match we’re seeing, Cole. It’s gonna take luck to put one team away. Alix dropkicks MD outside while Krista rams Malaysia into the buckle and follows up with corner punches from the middle rope. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FI-- NO! Malaysia bear hugs Krista and drops her face-first on the top turnbuckle. Suddenly we cut backstage where an AMBULANCE driven by TIM CASH parks. In the passenger’s seat is none other than BARON WINDELS, head bandaged and all. COLE What do we have here? Always ready for the unknown, the OAOAST production team puts up a split-screen with BW power walking to the ring as Malaysia sets Krista overhead for THE CANADIAN BACKBREAKER PILEDRIVER. As Krista is lifted up her feet accidentally strikes the official upside the head. COACH Now we have no referee. Malaysia drops Krista as BW sprints down the aisle and attacks MD! COLE & COACH Caught off-guard MD dives back in the ring and throws Malaysia at BW, who decks her with a Cowboy Bebop elbow to a rousing ovation. COACH Can somebody tell me what the hell is going on? COLE I think we just found out who ambushed Baron Windels earlier in the night. Cash tries to prevent MD from fleeing the scene but is shoved aside. BW gives chase as Malaysia staggers to her feet and right into a CODEBREAKER! COLE KIDology! Malaysia pops straight up in the air and gets drilled by a SOMERSAULT NECKBREAKER by Alix! COLE Confessions of a Kristaholic! COACH 2 on 1, Cole. Senior referee Earl Hebner slowly crawls over as Krista makes the cover. ONE… TWO… THREE!!! * DINGDINGDINGDING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, history has been made. The winners of the match… and for the SIXTH-TIME your One & Only World tag team champions… KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN and ALIX MARIA SPEZIA… CHICKS OOOOVVVEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKKSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Baron Windels returns ringside along with Tim Cash to hand COD the tag titles himself, then raises their hands in victory as pyro blasts and confetti falls from the ceiling. COLE It’s gotta eat BW alive inside the way his team’s title reign ended, but yet again he proves what a real man he is, not some snake in the grass like Mr. Dick. COACH Haters gonna hate, Cole, but Dick knew Baron was the weak link in the team. Look at him fraternizing with the enemy. Dick did the right thing going with Malaysia in this match, which they had won I might add until Baron Windels interfered. Face it, Cole: he just doesn’t have the killer instincts like Mr. Dick. COLE That’s because Baron Windels respects the rule of law. COACH Don’t make me sick. COLE Ladies and gentlemen, we hoped you enjoyed School’s Out 2010. Remember to join us again live on pay-per-view Sunday night, June 27 for the 9th annual Great Angle Bash and this week for HeldDOWN~! For Da Coach I’m Michael Cole saying goodnight! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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