Chanel #99 Posted March 31, 2013 Report Share Posted March 31, 2013 -OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT-8 Mile Detroit Michigan Two cars, a Mitsibushi and a Spyder pull up next to each other at a traffic light. In the Mitsibushi is Mister Dick with Malaysia in the passenger seat, in the Spyder is Tim Cash. MISTER DICK Hey, baby, you wanna fuck or you wanna race? CASH Racing is an unsafe practice that can cost lives. MISTER DICK Pussy! Mister Dick speeds off leaving Tim Cash behind. He heads onto the highway, driving peacefully until he notices a Spyder rapidly approaching. MISTER DICK It couldn’t be. It can be and it is, Tim Cash and his high powered car speed past Mister Dick. Cash sticks his hand out the window and waves goodbye to Mister Dick. This enrages The Human Hard On and he steps on the gas to chase down Cash. He catches Cash suddenly cutting down a side exit, but can’t brake in time to make the same move. Forced to rethink his plan, Mister Dick slams on the breaks and then starts driving through traffic IN REVERSE! MISTER DICK You afraid, baby? MALAYSIA I’m not afraid of nothing. MISTER DICK Good. Malaysia points out Tim Cash zooming down a side street. Past honking traffic does Mister Dick weave his way to chase down his rival. Mister Dick continues to accelrate, inching closer and closer to Cash. That is until Cash hits the nitrious and flies forward to pace himself away from Mister Dick. MISTER DICK That son of a bitch! Mister Dick flips the switch, causing himself and Malaysia to be thrown back in their seats as their car furiously rockets forwards. They leave all auto mobiles and scenery in their wake as a muddy blur, as they catch up to Cash’s convertible. MALAYSIA Bridge! MISTER DICK Huh? Mister Dick looks ahead to see a bridge raising ahead! Panicked, he skids to a sudden and halting stop. But Cash plays the dare devil and takes the bridge on with reckless gusto. He yells out into the night as the elevated bridge launches him into the Detroit night, making him one with the clouds. Finally he comes down on the road, spinning wildly nearly throwing itself into the guardrail. MISTER DICK I didn’t think he had it in him. Cash exits the car, as the bridge begins lowering. He sees Mister Dick looking at him in frightened awe, and the two men engage in a staredown. ~MOTOR CITY SPECTACULAR~ We go live to the Joe Louis Arena, which is filled to capacity with roaring OAOAST Marks. They brandish signs and put up loud cheers in anticipation for the Motor City Spectacular BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen please silence all cellphones and electronic devices or else they will be stolen and sold on the street corner by the Ghetto Groove Monkeys. Thank you. COLE Folks, welcome to Detroit city for the Motor City Spectacular! We are live inside the Joe Louis Arena in downtown Detroit, and Coach, the excitement level of the OAOAST Galaxy is off the charts! COACH No doubt, Mikey! They are pumped for our mainevent of Tim Cash against Mister Dick. COLE Two men who are polar opposites of each other that have formed a tense friendship lately. But in Mister Dick’s case kindness will be thrown out the window, and we’ll have to see how Baron Windells reacts to that. Right now let’s throw it backstage to Terry Taylor to give us a report on the Baron Windells and Leon Rodez match. We cut backstage to Terry Taylor who stands in front of The Gunslinger lockeroom. TERRY Thanks, Michael, Baron Windells has made it clear that he believes the Money In The Bank briefcase should be his. He’s expressed gratitude to Josie Baker for giving him the opportunity to compete for it. Leon Rodez on the other hand sees this as just another roadblock in his quest to regain the world title. It should be interesting to see their two goals collide tonight. Back to you at ringside. COLE Thanks, Terry. We will also see a number one contenders match tonight for the one and only world tag team titles with the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club facing off against their old rivals Chicks Over Dicks. Rico and Lucius sport and atrocious zero wins and five losses against Alix and Krista. COACH That was the Wrecking Crew, Mikey. This is the Hellfire Club of the Cucaracha Kingdom, led by Landon Maddix. They’re fighting for queen, king, and country tonight. I see a big upset on the horizon. COLE Well, folks lets kick it off with a little home cooking in D*LUX facing The Enterprise! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 31, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2013 Please allow me to introduce myself Im a man of wealth and taste Ive been around for a long, long year Stole many a mans soul and faith And I was round when jesus christ Had his moment of doubt and pain Made damn sure that pilate Washed his hands and sealed his fate "Sympathy For The Devil" by Guns and Roses plays out The Enterprise, as popular as ever. I.e, not very. Green and yellow lights swirl across the arena, as MONEY begins to shower down from the ceiling. COACH Whoo-hoo! COLE Stay right here. COACH Aww.Pleased to meet you Hope you guess my name But whats puzzling you Is the nature of my game Flashing the "money fingers" is Theodore Moneymaker, laughing it up at he stands underneath the falling bills. Christian Wright stands at his side with Lorelei DeCenzo by his side, the trio looking most comfortable underneath all this money. Even if it is fake moneey, with Theodore Moneymaker's face plastered on it. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen this is your opening contest, LIVE from Detroit, Michigan's Motor City Spectacular! A tag team contest, set for one fall... introducing first, team number one. Accompanied to the ring by LORELEI DECENZO! Representing THE ENTERPRISE... the team of "THE GOD CHILD" CCHHRRRRRIIISSSSTTIIIAAAAANN WWRRRIIIIIIIIIIGGHHHHTT... and, his tag team partner, the CEO of The Enterprise and former World Heavyweight Champion... "THE BILLION DOLLAR HEIR" TTHHHEEEOOOOOODDOOOOOORRRREEE... MMOOOONNEEEEYYYYMMAAAAAAKKEEEERRRRRRR!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Moneymaker leads Lorelei safely up the steps and into the ring as Christian gets into an arguement with a fan. Which he wins easily, simply by baboozling the man with words. COACH Always a treat to see Mr. Moneymaker in action! COLE Yes. Theodore hasn't gotten his hands dirty in a while, so we'll see if there's any ring rust on The Billion Dollar Heir here tonight.WELL ITS MIDNIGHT AND ITS COLDER PULL YOU CLOSER I CAN SEE THROUGH WHEN ITS SUNSHINE AND ITS SOLAR AND ITS OVER GUESS ITS ME AND YOU BLOOD. BY. SUN. LIGHT. "Solar Midnite" by Lupe Fiasco powers out through the arena, to a screaming roar from the Detroit crowd! Rushing out onto the stage, the fired up boys from Michigan, Tyler and Shayne, rush out towards their fans and fire them up. A little bit cooler and more nonchalant are their management team, Maya and Jade, although Jade seems happy to be home as well. Maya, being from Los Angeles, sees Detroit for the stinkhole it has become, but plays nice and takes pity. BUFFER And introducing the opponents! Hailing from the great state of Michigan!! "YYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYY!!!" BUFFER Accompanied to the ring by JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN and MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD! Total combined weight, three hundred and seventy nine pounds... "SHOWTIME" SHAYNE... "TREMENDOUS" TYLER... ladies and gentlemen, D*LLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!" The homestate heroes handslap their way down the aisle, the cameras getting a good shot of the bruising underneath Shayne's left eye as he passes by. COLE This match stems from last week's HeldDOWN, where it was supposed to be Christian Wright going one on one with Shayne Brave. However, Christian had an offer to make. Five thousand dollars, to forfeit the match! And when Shayne didn't accept... well, then this happened...LORELEI What do you say, Shayne? SHAYNE No way! "YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The audience is enthused and gleeful but Wright certainly is not. Assuming he had the night off, The God Child becomes enraged and lunges for Shayne. He strikes the teenyboppin wrestler right in the eye with the microphone! Shayne sinks down to the canvas, and is brutalized with more attacks from CW's microphone. COACH Cut Shayne some slack, everybody. He ain't used to holding a microphone. Can't blame him for being clumsy and poking himself in the eye with one. COLE CW went on to win that match, thanks to the cheapshot to the eye, to maintain his undefeated streak in singles competition. As D*LUX slide into the ring the smiles on their faces disappear and they stare down The Enterprise, who look on unconcerned as they disrobe. *DINGDINGDING* With the bell sounded, CW starts out for his team, against Tyler, who gets the Detroit crowd a-clappin'. WRIGHT SILENCE! SILENCE I SAY! COLE Christian, not big on the rhythmic clapping. COACH Yeah, what a prude! Who needs Beethoven when you've got 10,000 slobs slapping their hands together like hungry seals? Out of a lock-up Tyler gets a hammerlock on CW. Wright looks up, down and all around for an escape before he takes Tyler down with a drop toehold. As he rolls over the back looking for a headlock though, Tyler slips out and grabs another hammerlock. "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" Wright grumbles over the continued noise around him, getting to his feet. And he silences the crowd for a moment by hitting an elbow, breaking free of the hold. Wright then hits the ropes, but Tyler delivers an armdrag and hangs on, barring the arm again, to CW's frustration. COACH This isn't fair. These people are throwing CDub off his game. This is a man used to concentration, calm, serenity. You think he has pop music blasting out while he's balancing the Enterprise books? Back to his feet again Wright is backed towards the ropes, where Shayne makes a quick tag. Whipped across CW is then hit with a Double Hiptoss by the Michigan heartthrobs! Shayne plays to the crowd a little bit, before going for a pin... 1... 2... No! Shayne quickly takes over on the arm, barring it up. "LET'S GO SHAYNE!" "LET'S GO SHAYNE!" "LET'S GO SHAYNE!" "LET'S GO SHAYNE!" COACH There's that noise again! COLE This isn't a library, Coach. This is a wrestling event. COACH You think these people have ever been inside a library? No. CW has. And that's how he likes it. QUIET! Back up, Wright buries a knee to the gut, then nails Shayne with a measured right hand. The ref warns him about the closed fist, but CW delivers a second one anyway. Irish whip sends Shayne for the ride, but as CW ducks his head, Shayne baseball slides right through his legs! Wright turns around and quickly goes for a clothesline. But Shayne ducks and turns it into a Backslide! 1... 2... No! Clearly annoyed, Wright tries to cut off Shayne's youthful exuberance with a boot to the midsection. Catching the foot, Shayne wags his finger. After a dizzying spin around, Wright is then hit with a hard right hand, right to the EYE! "YYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" Howling in pain, Christian scrambles to his corner leading to an almighty protest from The Enterprise! Shayne meanwhile wheels away and jumps to the turnbuckles to play to the Michigan crowd! COACH What a cheapshot artist! He hit him right in the eye! COLE Well maybe that was a little payback from Shayne. Or maybe it was an accident. COACH Maybe you's a simple bitch! He punched The God Child in the eye, that should be a disqualification! Furious, in comes Moneymaker to berate the referee and demand the DQ. Getting a little over-heated he ends up shoving the referee... who shoves right back, causing Moneymaker to back down! The Enterprise are forced into some calm and Moneymaker legally tags in, allowing CW to nurse his injured eye with Lorelei outside. MAYA HEY TEDDY! Moneymaker prepares to lock-up with Shayne, trying to concentrate. MAYA TEDDY! TEDDY! TEDDY! Which is proving hard to do. Moneymaker stalls over locking up because of the annoying voice in his head. MAYA TEEEE - DDYYYYYY! MONEYMAKER WHAT!? WHAT IS IT, WHAT!?! MAYA Game's over there. As Moneymaker finally loses his cool with his young tormentor, he suddenly gets rolled up from behind! 1... 2... KICKOUT! Shayne wrings the arm on Moneymaker and makes the tag to Tyler, who comes in off the top with a double sledge. A second wring of the arm by Tyler is cut off by Teddy raking the eyes though. After a couple of knees, Moneymaker whips Tyler into the ropes. Tyler ducks underneath a clothesline though. And then a back elbow. Thrown off his game, Theodore is then hit with a crossbody block! 1... 2... NO! Tyler starts firing away with right hands, rocking the former World's Champion. Ending up backed in a corner Moneymaker is then penned in by Tyler, who calls out to the crowd... "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" "FIVE!" "SIX!" "SEVEN!" "EIGHT!" "NINE!" TYLER WHAT'S UP MICHIGAN! "YYYYYAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!" "TEN!" COLE Another Top Ten Hit for Tyler Bryant! Staggering out of the corner, Theodore looks a little wobbly. Insults are thrown back and forth by Maya and Lorelei on the floor, as Tyler aims for Moneymaker with a clothesline as he wanders aimlessly by the ropes... but Moneymaker ducks and sends Tyler right into the path of a CW clothesline from the apron!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COLE Come on! Wright from the outside and the referee didn't see it, distracted by the squabbling on the outside. Tag is made to Wright and he comes in laying in boots, giving Lorelei the chance to end the squabble and gloat instead. Picking up Tyler, CW lays him against the ropes... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and delivers a hard chop to the chest. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and another one. The referee backs Wright away, allowing Moneymaker to wander down the apron again, laying in a clubbing overhand to the chest. COLE And this is where The Enterprise is in it's element. Shayne and Jade try to complain to the referee, but the damage has been done by the time he turns around. Whipped into the ropes, Tyler is thrown up and hit with the WRIGHT OFF by CW, sitting Tyler on his shoulders... 1... 2... No! Dishing out some more stomps, Wright lords it over the crowd by flashing the "money fingers", joined by a CACKLING Moneymaker! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH So much for Michigan pride. I bet Mr. Moneymaker could buy this entire trainwreck state if he wanted to! Wright dishes out some European uppercuts to Tyler, then makes the tag to Moneymaker. Taken up onto the shoulders of The God Child, Tyler is crushed into the mat by the Bank Roll! Moneymaker then calmly follows up by dropping a FISTFUL OF DOLLARS and making the cover... 1... 2... No! Annoyed, Moneymaker gets back up and drops a second Fistful Of Dollars! And a third! And then a fourth, before trying the cover again... 1... 2... Kickout! Moneymaker berates the referee again, then makes the tag to Wright. Together The Enterprise whip Tyler into the ropes. Moneymaker buries a hard shot into the midsection, doubling Tyler up, for an STO by Christian! Dusting his hands with satisfaction, The God Child then goes for the pin... 1... 2... Kickout again! COACH What!? Come on referee, these two could buy and sell you, show some respect and count. Wright slaps on a sleeper hold, leaving Lorelei and Moneymaker to voice their disapproval with the referee. Meanwhile in the D*LUX corner, Shayne and Jade try to get the crowd going. "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" WRIGHT SILENCE! "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" "TY - LER!" Willed on by the crowd, Tyler starts to fight back to his feet. And buries an elbow into the midsection. A second one. And a third to break free! Wright quickly cuts him off with a knee, then hits the ropes, but runs right back into an inverted atomic drop! The pained God Child limps back towards the D*LUX corner as Tyler decides to make a dive for the tag... ...but gets caught! Wright carried Tyler away from his corner and drops him down, in order to go behind with a waistlock. Blocking the german suplex attempt twice, Tyler then counters a third attempt with a roll through. But he doesn't hang on for the pin, opting instead to keep rolling, making it to his corner and TAGGING SHAYNE! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" Sitting up confused, Wright looks up in shock to see Shayne flying off the top with the PICTURE PERFECT ELBOWDROP!! COLE AW YEAH~! Shayne jumps right back up, catching Moneymaker coming in with right hands. The Billion Dollar Heir tries to swat Shayne down, but his swipes are ducked by the boybander, who eventually jumps up and cracks Theodore in the head with an enziguri!! Moneymaker tumbles out of the ring and Shayne turns his attentions back to Wright. The God Child walks right into a Leg Lariat from Shayne, who quickly goes for the cover... 1... 2... NO! Waving CW up, Shayne hits a couple of forearms, then hits the ropes. Recovering, Wright tries to throw Shayne up with the Wright Off. But Shayne counters in mid-air with a headscissors! COLE Tremendous counter! D*LUX are starting to roll here. Shayne quickly calls Tyler back into the ring to set up a double team. Scrambling back to his feet, Wright targets them both with a double clothesline, but they duck. As Wright comes back off the ropes, D*LUX then mobilise. Hitting a double thrust kick to the midsection they double CW up. Shayne then hits an inverted atomic drop, holding him in place for Tyler to take a run up and blast him with a Yakuza Kick!! COLE Opposites Attract! Two steps forward, two steps back for The God Child! Floating over, Shayne goes for a a jacknife pin as Tyler steps back out... 1... 2... NO!! Shayne rolls over and legally tags Tyler in again. COLE Here we go! Calling for the D*LUX Capacitor! COACH These kids are so pop culture. As Shayne sets, Tyler goes over to Wright and tries to lift him into the wheelbarrow position. But as Wright blocks that, Shayne suddenly disappears, pulled out of the ring by Moneymaker. Tyler leaves CW to knock Moneymaker off the apron, then turns around and gets caught with an inside cradle! 1... 2... NO! COLE Tyler almost got caught there, but now, fighting back. Tyler fires away with right hands, fending Wright off until Moneymaker slides back in. Tyler breaks away to fend off Theodore as well, but then turns back to Wright and walks right into a SUPERKICK! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Come on referee, get one of these two out of the ring. COACH Oh, so it's only okay to have two guys in the ring if they have a cute name for a double team move? Picking Tyler up, The Enterprise set him up. Wright holding Tyler for Moneymaker, who takes aim with a clothesline... ...and NARROWLY avoids clotheslining Wright! Making their apologies, The Enterprise turn around, to find Shayne springing to the top and soaring at them with a DOUBLE Flying Clothesline!! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!" As The Enterprise pick themselves back, Tyler charges at Moneymaker and clotheslines him over the top, the momentum throwing him out of the ring as well! Meanwhile, Shayne waits for Christian on the second rope. He draws him in, delivers a right hand, then comes off the ropes with a TORNADO DDT!! COLE Shayne with a big move! And the undefeated streak may be in jeopardy! An eye for an eye! Shayne lies in wait for Wright again, ready to put the finishing touches on the seemingly unbeatable God Child... ...which is when Lorelei appears on the apron! COLE Wait a minute! In an effort to distract Showtime, The Money Honey starts to shimmy with her top and tease him with THE GOODS~! Shayne seems, understandably, intrigued and moves towards the promised land. When suddenly, the land disappears from underneath Lorelei's feet, courtesy of Jade Rodez-Duncan! Hauled down by the home-state girl, Lorelei starts screaming at Jade and takes a running swipe at her, which Jade ducks, sending Lorelei RIGHT INTO A SPEAR BY MAYA!!!!!!!! "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" COACH AAAHHHHH!! The crowd erupt for Maya's attack, but are suddenly struck into silence as Shayne catches Wright running in with an O'Connor roll, only for Christian to reverse on top and PULL THE TIGHTS!!! COLE Wait, the tights ref, the tights! 1... 2... 3!!!!!!! COLE Gah! COACH YEAH!! HAHA! DETROIT, WUT? *DINGDINGDING* Wright escapes out of the ring before Tyler can get to him and throws his hands to the skies, victorious, cheap as it was. BUFFER Here are your winners... CHRISTIAN WRIGHT and THEODORE MONEYMAKER, TTHHHEEEE EEENNTTEEEERRRPPRRRRIIIIISSSSSSEEEEEE!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Hearing the announcement, Moneymaker lets out a mighty cackle on the opposite side of the ring and The Enterprise come together in celebration, joined belatedly by Lorelei, still fuming about being embarrassed a moment ago. D*LUX fume just as loudly in the ring, Shayne and Jade both complaining to the referee about the pull of the tights. COACH Unbeatable! The man is un, de, featable! COLE What a sad homecoming this has turned out to be for D*LUX, robbed here in their hometown thanks to a handful of the tights. What a sickener this has to be. The Enterprise continue to laugh up their victory, all except Lorelei, scowling eyes fixed on the ring and the scowling Maya.COMING UP NEXT WOMEN'S TITLE MATCH HOLLY VS MAGGIE NERDLYNEXT!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 31, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2013 plays to a solid ovation from the OAOAST Galaxy. Full of energy and fire, Maggie Nerdly rushes through the grill of the car onto the entrance stage. She wears black mini skirt and a sleeveless My Chemical Romance shirt, while holding a boquet of flowers. The baby of the Nerdly family travels from side to side of the stage, firing up the Detroit crowd. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a time limit of twenty minutes and it is for the OAOAST Women’s Title…Now making her way to the ring, from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, she is The It Girl on the scene….MAAAAGIEEEEEE NERDDLYYYYYYYYYYYY! Maggie slaps the hands of the fans down the entrance ramp, as she wears a bright and bold smile. COLE Maggie Nerdly, the chosen challenger of Josie Baker facing the chosen champion in Holly. And what a battle it should be here in Detroit, Michigan! Maggie hits the ring and directs her boquet of flowers at all four ringposts.BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Still sporting that broad smile, Maggie throws the bouquet backwards, causing a rush of fans to fight over it in the front row. COLE I never catch the bouquet. Always the bridesmaid never the bride NOW I’M THAT BITCH NOW I’M THAT BITCH NOW I’M THAT BITCH NOW I’M THAT BITCH Livvi Franc’s Now I’m That Bitch shifts into Anberlin’s and the boos are plentiful. Onto stage steps Quiz, wearing little more than grey boots and blue tights. He stand stoically, as Holly storms out from the backstage area. She throws up her title in defiance of the capacity crowd before making her way to the ring. BUFFER And the champion! Being accompanied by Quiz, she hails from Las Vegas, Nevada, she is HOOOOOOOOLYYYYYYYYY! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Entering the ring, Holly shoots a testy stare at Maggie. The “It” Girl returns the favor, showing little fear of the profane challenger. DING DING DING The two gorgeous ladies circle each other, snarls forming on their red lips. Holly then breaks the standoff by lunging forward and capturing Maggie’s bare leg and dragging her to the canvas. From there Holly captures hold Maggie’s arm and begins wrenching it around. This hurts hellishly, but it doesn’t prevent Maggie from kicking upwards with her tennis shoes and backing Holly away. “LET’S GO MAGGIE! LET’S GO MAGGIE! LET’S GO MAGGIE!” the fans chant because usually I don’t write chants for the girls and that’s just sexist of me. Holly’s frustrated and annoyed and rips off her red boa in symbolism of her rage. But she calms down to invite Maggie into a lockup. The It Girl accepts the invitation but soon finds she was bamboozled as Holly wraps her muscular legs around Maggie’s and brings her to the mat. Moving quickly, Holly swings to Maggie’s side and captures her in a front facelock. The cute Nerdly girl refuses to be grounded, and makes a speedy fight to her feet. But she can’t stay upright for very long as Holly rips her downwards with a headlock takedown. COLE Holly a two time women’s champion, Maggie a one time. There’s championship credentials in this match, Coach. COACH And some fine pairs of tittays! Maggie laces her legs around Holly’s neck, choking the Angel of Death. Instantly paniced, Holly frees Maggie and pops to her feet. She throws up a finger of warning at The It Girl, drawing Maggie to dismissivly shake her hand. At the referee’s orders the ladies come together towards the center of the ring. Its Holly who strikes first and deadliest with an army boot to Maggie’s exposed midfriff. A knife edge chop rocks Maggie to her very core and allows Holly to whip her into the ropes. But as the Canadian returns, she slides through Holly’s legs and evades a lariat. Desperate to not be caught by any sort of attack, Holly now makes a run to the ropes. Her return meets with failure, though, as Maggie throws her overhead with a hip toss! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans cheer as Quiz pounds on the mat in disgust. Holly finds her way back towards her feet, only to be sent crashing into the canvas with another hip toss. Now looking for an escape the ravishing redhead, comes back upright. But Maggie strikes her with an inverted atomic drop, then fells her with a dropkick from her tennis shoes. The RAWK~! hand signal is flashed to the roaring audience right before the perky Nerdly nails the champion with a leaping elbow drop! COLE Coach what is Maggie’s main strategy in this match? COACH It should be to flash us like Molly. Holly staggers to her feet and finds her way into the corner. There’s little reprieve for her there, however, as Maggie terrorizes her stomach with stomps and punches. Once done with her brutal series of attacks, Maggie takes hold of Holly’s shirt sleeve and throws her across the ring to the other corner. Maggie charges in after her, but Holly is well prepared for her and attempts to back body drop the youngest Nerdly kid over the ropes. But Maggie lands easily on her tennis shoes. A highly vexed Holly swings around to attack with a punch, but finds her blow blocked aside. Maggie then climbs to the top rope and rallies the audience with a clapping of her hands. She then flies at Holly and shoves her to the canvas with a cross body block! Referee Clem Buzzlefoxer drops to his arthritic knees to count the pinfall… ONE! The ravishing redhead powers out the pinfall long before a two count. The Angel of Death then makes quick return to her feet, but stumbles back to the corner. Trapped there she’s caught within a front facelock and lifted onto the third turnbuckle. Continuing to pump up the audience, Maggie elevates herself to Holly’s position. COLE What’s Maggie got in store? COACH I’m afraid Holly’s about to find out! But Holly thinks and acts with remarkable speed and headbutts Maggie in the stomach. The baby of the Nerdly family stumbles backwards, but comes down on her feet. However, she’s a touch dazed and this causes her to be an easy target for the diving lariat Holly punishes her with. Smiling to herself, Holly then takes to her feet and batters her foe with stomps from her rock solid combat boots. Once assured that Maggie’s been properly tormented, Holly drags her off the canvas and snaps on a cravate style headlock. Maggie whimpers in distress, and its distress that only grows worse when Holly begins pumping knees into The It Girl’s skull. COLE A hard shot from Holly! You have to ask yourself what might PRL be wondering as he watches this crucial match between Holly and Maggie? COACH He’s probably wondering what other wrestlers he can rip off and what other announcers he can try to chase out a job like me! Holly frees Maggie in order to take to the ropes. They push her back towards her opponent and she strikes with devastating purpose with a raised knee. Maggie falls over onto her back, allowing for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Maggie gets her shoulder off the canvas! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Deeply troubled by maggie’s kickout, Holly goes right back to the cravate in order to torment the teenager. But the hold isn’t applied for more than a few seconds before Maggie gathers her strength and begins blasting Holly’s stomach with closed fists. She frees herself from Holly’s cravate, and then makes a speedy trip to the ropes. But Holly does the same, and when the two meet in the center of the ring its Holly winning the duel with a big boot! Quiz claps his hands, because if anyone knows about good big boots it’s a Test clone. COLE Holly nearly took Maggie’s head off with that move! COACH Thank god she didn’t, I need as much spank material as I can get. Holly scoops Maggie onto her shoulders, as she curses out the referee for no reason in particular. Still spewing vulagrities, she throws Maggie off her shoulders and strikes her with a gut buster. COLE VINTAGE Holly! COACH You are more annoying than the bitch on the Progressive commercials. Maggie gets to her feet, as Holly waits crouched behind her. Once fully erect (an anatomical impossibility!) Maggie is trapped inside a reverse waistlock. COLE German suplex? But Maggie makes a mad and desperate dash for the corner and clings onto the ropes for safety. Holly is thrown backwards which does little to cure her perpetually dour mood. Thus its with great anger that she rushes forward and connects with a lariat onto her foe’s back! Maggie sinks down to the ground, and is immediately thrown under fire from a cascade of army boots by The Angel of Death! Buzzlefoxer attempts to interject himself into the parade of strikes, but is met with a torrent of hatred from the redhead. COLE I don’t think there’s ever been a superstar in the OAOAST with as much hatred and bile in her vocabulary than Holly. Maggie makes an attempt to fight back towards her feet. However, Holly tries her hardest to keep her down with punches to her head. Soon the two are locked into a slugfest with the grounded Maggie taking aim at Holly’s stomach, and Holly teeing off on Maggie’s head. But Holly wins the war with a knee to Maggie’s face. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Of small consellation to Maggie is that she landed near the ropes. This permits her with a way to crawl back upright. But she’s met with punches from Holly that send her stumbling into the corner. Trapped against the turnbuckles, Maggie is thrown under fire by a downpour of strikes from the champion. Holly quickly grows tired of mere punches and instead choses to choke her helpless foe! COLE This is too much! COACH This is what you have to do as a champion. Sometimes you have to skirt the rules to keep your title. Buzzlefoxer does not approve and immediately seperates Holly from her victim. This does not please Holly one bit, and her bile mouth lets the elderly official hear about it. Once she’s assured the official has gotten her point, Holly turns her attention back towards Maggie. But the challenger is not the weakened lass Holly remembered as she begins fighting back with vicious right hands. Maggie then attempts a whip to the ropes, but Holly reverses the hold. This doesn’t ‘t stop Maggie’s momentum, though, as she leaps at Holly and takes her down with a diving lariat! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE Could Maggie be staging a comeback? COACH I don’t think she can pull it off, Mikey, she’s been to worn down by Holly. Plus I just don’t want her to win, and all women’s aim should to be please me, their master. Holly picks herself off the canvas, but is instantly nailed by a running leg lariat from The It Girl. Clutching her sore head, Holly returns back upright and is again slung to the canvas with a dropkick! Maggie then picks Holly up and attempts to throw her into the corner, but Holly reverses it and its Maggie who’s sent back first into the corner. Holly lets out a stream of profanity and then makes a charge towards Maggie. But The It Girl intercepts her opponent with a tennis shoe to the face. COLE Maggie caught Holly with that one! The It Girl scales to the top rope, while Holly dizzily staggers about the ring. She then throws herself backwards and takes Holly down to the canvas with a moonsault press! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans delight as Holly escapes out the ring to catch a much needed breather. However, that reprieve will not be granted by Maggie who leaps over the ropes to wipe Holly out with a plancha! COLE I think we’re heading towards a new champion, Coach. COACH You might be right, Mikey, things have suddenly taken a downturn for Holly. Holly is in considerable pain, and wails in agony. Maggie for her part leans against the guradrail, clutching a sore midsection. Despite her pain, she manages to bring Holly to her feet and chuck her inside the ring. Slowly but steadily, Maggie begins climbing onto the ring apron. But her attention is captured by Quiz making his way to her location. COLE What does this monster want out of Maggie? COACH Probably to offer her some tea and crumpets. COLE Oh yeah right! Knowing full well that a horrible act is about to befall Maggie, Clem leans through the ropes to ward Quiz off. The two engage in an argument, capturing Clem’s attention but freeing Maggie’s to return her focus towards Holly. But as she returns to trying to enter the ring, Holly slugs her with a pair of brass knuckles! COLE Oh my! Maggie is slung backwards and crashed against the guardrail. Her body lies lifeless, as the fans desperately check on her condition. COLE That is just awful! Holly is despicable. COACH Shut up, Daffy Duck, you gotta do what it takes to retain a title belt. With Maggie out, and the plan perfectly executed, Quiz backs off from Buzzlefoxer. The elderly official finds Maggie mysteriously knocked out and has no choice but to score the countout…. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! COLE I don’t believe this is happening! SIX! COACH That was brilliant strategy by Quiz and Holly. Couldn’t have done it better myself. SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN! DING DING DING “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Holly churlishly demands her title belt and that her hand be raised. Buzzlefoxer meets both requests, causing more boos to spew from the stands. BUFFER Your winner as a result of a countout….HOLLY! COLE What a terrible way to end the match, Holly with the cheapshot and Maggie knockedout left laying at ringside. I know we won't see the same behavior from Wrestling's Last Real Good Guy Tim Cash in tonight's mainevent. COACH That's because Tim Cash doesn't have the guts to do whatever it takes to win. He doesn't have the mental makeup to be a champion. COLE But he's got the heart of a champion, and you know it, Coach.TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT OAOAST WORLD TITLE MISTER DICK VS TIM CASHTONIGHT!COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 31, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2013 We cut to Michael Buffer, standing within a gold spotlight in the ring… BUFFER The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall and it is to determine the number one contenders for the OAOAST tag team titles! Robyn and Snoop Dogg grace the arena with the sensual ballad of . The entrance doors in the grill of the automobile spread apart to bring out Queen Esther in a gigantic poofy white gown. She waves her magic wand with a giddy smile to make the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club appear on stage. Wearing black slacks and a confident smile, Soul picks his fro, while Rico, attired in Brazlian flag pattern tights, strokes his pornstache and eyes down the finer ladies in attendance. BUFFER Introducing first… representing CUCARACHA KINGDOM they are accompanied by QUEEN ESTHER.…“THE BLACK KNIGHT” LUCIUS SOUL and “THE WHITE KNIGHT” RICO DE JANEIRO… THE MARDI GRAS HELLFIRE CLUB!! COLE The Mardi Gras Hellfire Club has never beaten COD, some would say they’re the worst victims of Alix and Krista. But if their fortunes change tonight they could be in line for a tag team title shot at School’s Out. COACH They got some good advice from Landon Maddix, a multi time world champion in the SWF and a world champion in the OAOAST. Landon is going to steer these guys to the gold. And if they win those tag titles Cucaracha Kingdom will be the most powerful stable in the OAOAST. Queen Esther makes her way around the ring, smiling and waving to a less than receptive audience. Rico does his usual business of offering beads in exchange for breasts but as usual finds only the fat chicks are willing takers. Soul isn't as picky as his partner however and offers these chubettes a place in his roster of hos.Hey, hey, you, you I don't like your girlfriend! No way, no way! I think you need a new one Hey, hey, you, you I could be your girlfriend! “YEAAAAAAAAAA!”Hey, hey, you, you! I know that you like me! No way, no way! No, it's not a secret Hey, hey, you, you!! I want to be your girlfriend! Multi colored spotlights flash and shine as a red pyro fall dives from the ceiling. A pink pyro fountain reaches upwards to mingle with it, until a yellow pyro wall destroys them both. Then America’s sweethearts step onto stage to a gigantic ovation from the capacity crowd. . Alix sports a furry motif in her attire with a furry white bikini top, furry boots, and white booty shorts. Krista reps Judaism hard with a white booty shorts with the star of david on the back, a white headband with the star of david on front and a tube top with the star of david on each side of the chest. Krista spins Alix around before pulling her adorable girlfriend into her arms. Alix sexily looks over her shoulders and tosses a cute kiss to the camera as super imposed lips sweep onto screen. BUFFER And the opponents…., the most searched on Google in 2009, the Hollywood Bad Girl….ALIX MARIA SPEZIAAAAAAA! And, her tag team partner. She is a best selling author and star of the world famous FIT with KID line of exercise videos! 2009's most searched superstar on Yahoo, 2009's highest trending OAOAST topic on Twitter, 2010's Angle Award winning Wrestler Of The Year, more famous than everyone else put together and multiplied by four! She is a former two-time OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion... ladies and gentlemen, "MISS CALIFORNIA"... KKRRIIIIISSTTAAAA ISADORA... DDUUUUUUUUUUUUNNCCAAAAAAAAAAAAANN!!!! Together, they are the 2010 Anderson Cup champions and five time tag team champions AMERICA’S SWEETHEARTS…CCHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIICCKKSSSSSSSSS OOOOVVVEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKKSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!! America’s Sweethearts hook arms and meerily skip down the entrance ramp while blowing kisses to their admirers. COLE America’s Sweethearts Chicks Over Dicks, it doesn’t come more successful in the ring and out of the ring than these two. But The Hellfire Club thinks they have the magic trick to finally beat Alix and Krista. COACH The Wrecking Crew were miniature poodle puppies, The Hellfire Club is pitbulls! Krista shows of her flexibility and her gorgeous legs by hanging upside down on the third rope. Alix chooses a less flashy route, instead happily waving to the audience. Once done with hanging on the third rope, Krista answers her cellphone for some odd reason only she will comprehend. COACH She brought her cellphone to the match? Can’t her agent wait to call her until after the show? DING DING DING RICO Come on, chica, let’s get this started! KRISTA I’m on the phone with my Aunt, she lives in Gross Pointe, she wants us to come over for dinner. You wouldn’t know anything about that seeing that your family eats cold food out of dumpsters. What’s that, Aunt Rachel? You think he’s kind of cute? Rico? What’s he doing after the show? I’ll ask him. Rico, Aunt Rachel wants to know what cesspool you’ll be tainting with your presence after the show is over. RICO Landon is taking us to the Motor City Casino, chica. Drinks on him, gambling on him, women on him. KRISTA She wants to know if she can come. RICO No. KRISTA Canshecomecanshecomecanshecomecanshecomecanshecomecanshecomecanshecomecanshecome canshecomecanshecome? RICO No! No! No! No! No! No! No! Does that answer your question, mami? KRISTA No. Krista says goodbye to her Aunt and tucks the phone inside her skirt. Rico sees this as an opportunity to strike and rushes for Krista. But the fitness queen captures him into a headlock takedown. KRISTA Poor, miserable, Rico, when will you ever learn? Rico wraps his thick legs around Krista’s head, causing the busty blond to kip up. The South American follows her upwards but is again taken to the canvas with another headlock takedown. Krista wrenches on the hold, but it isn’t enough to keep Rico ground, The Brazillian fighting to his feet. He shoves Miss California into the ropes, expecting to be able to shoulder block her on her return. But the wrestler of the year soars through the air and catches him with a forearm! The blow doesn’t floor Rico, instead staggering him on his yellow and green boots. KRISTA Hebrew Hammer! Krista does just that, smacking Rico to the ground with the Hebrew Hammer! KRISTA I told you what I was going to do, honey, very loudly in fact. Its like your not even trying to stop me from humiliating you. Where’s the fun in this? Rico steps back to his feet and the two gladiators engage in a lockup. This time its Rico gaining the winning hand with a side headlock on Krista. The pornstached bralwer spins out into an arm wrench, hoping to shred her limb. But he meets only with failure as Krista counters into an armwrench of her own! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans scream as Alix is tagged into the contest. The bubbly brunette, giggles as she kicks Rico in the arm and sends him stumbling away in pain. She hounds his position, takes hold of his arm and arm drags him back into the COD corner. ALIX Whew! That was exhausting! Grumbling that she barely did anything, Krista takes a begrudging tag back into the contest….only to tag Alix right back. KRISTA Now that was exhausting! Entering the affair, Alix finds Rico has regained some strength as The White Knight rakes her green eyes. Desperate to be free of COD’s torture Rico runs to his corner and applies the tag with Lucius Soul! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Soul runs towards Alix, but skids to a sudden and wise halt when he sees her winding up for a dropkick! SOUL Wait now, babydoll, this jacket I got in is the new True Religion collection, and I know you can appreciate fine fashion. Is a playa right? ALIX Oh totally! ALIX Torn over her devotion to crass consumerisim and her desire to win the contest, Alix can’t bring herself to attack Soul while he’s wearing the jacket. KRISTA Uh, why are you talking like that? ALIX Bzzzzzzt light bulb! Alix politely removes Soul’s jacket from his shoulders, drawing a smile onto the Pimp’s face as this is true VIP treatment! That is until Alix proceeds to beat him with the suit coat! Soul screams out in embarrassment as the audience laughes at his horrible misfortune. QUEEN ESTHER (standing on the ring apron) Unhand that jacket at once, harlot! ALIX Okalie dokalie! Alix throws the jacket in Esther’s face! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” The commotion spurs Soul back to life and he rushes to attack Alix. But the feisty Latina grabs onto his arm and snaps it into an arm wrench. COLE How come we never get to talk when COD wrestles? COACH I quite enjoy being paid to sit back and watch Krista’s gigantic boobs. If Andre the giant is the 8th wonder of the world those things must be the 9th and 10th! Alix guides Soul to her corner and slaps Krista’s hand for a tag. The fitness queen enters the ring in a rather graceful way, slingshotting herself to strike Soul in the head with a dropkick! The former pimp is thrown back to the center of the ring, where Krista dives on top of him for a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Soul reaches down and gathers up his strength to make the kickout. As the audience boos the failed three count, Krista tags Alix into the ring. Together the girls hurl Soul into the ropes. Krista’s heels, and Alix’s snow boots then take The Black Knight off his feet with a pair of dropkicks! COLE Great doubleteaming by Alix and Krista record holding five time tag team champions. COACH But now they face a new Rico and Lucius and even if they beat them they face the toughest team in the OAOAST The Lonestar Gunslingers. Windells may be straight pussy but that dude Mister Dick plays for keeps. Next Alix drops a leg and Krista drops an elbow onto Soul’s prone body! This brings Rico’s unwelcome presence into the ring. But the girls are ready for him, taking him down with double leg lariats! Krista and Alix position themselves at Rico’s side as the audience roars in anticipation. Their every last wish is granted as the girls send their tight tanned booties on a furious jiggling spree. They roll and bounce their hips, making their juicy flesh jump and clap to the audience’s erotic glee. The girls cut the booty shaking short to flip back into a pair of moonsaults! Rico then makes a wise roll out of the ring, not wishing to tempt further damage. Krista pulls Soul to his feet and attempts a jawbreaker. But Sweet blocks it with a knee to her neck! This dazes and wounds Krista, allowing The Black Knight to make a tag to his long time partner. The two men grab onto Krista’s arms and shoot her into the cables. When she nears them, they flourish their elbows forward and strike her down. Rico then attempts a pinfall… ONE! TWO! The busty babe makes a timely kickout! However, she can not mount more offense, as Rico picks her off the mat and throws her into the waiting boot of his partner. A tag is then applied. Soul snaps on a neck vice upon entering the ring and throws Krista downwards with a neckbeaker. The 2010 wrestler of the year whimpers her miserey, as Soul struts a pimp strut above her. “YOU SUCK YOU SUCK! YOU SUCK!” Soul then returns to Krista with a standing shooting star press! However, Krista slides out the way and The Black Knight meets with a terrible crash into the canvas. As the audience salutes his misfortune, Krista rolls to her corner to apply the tag with Alix. ALIX Wheeeeeeeeeeee! Alix enters the ring with the gift of flesh shredding knife edge chops for Soul. With her foe dazed on his feet, she takes to the ropes. She leaps onto the third cable and comes Straight Outta Compton with a springboard spear! “ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” COLE VINTAGE Alix Maria Spezia! COACH You gotta be the worst person alive. Soul makes a slow rise off the canvas, which is the precise moment Alix kicks him in the face! Soul rolls away, moaning in agony and cursing his poor luck. Alix hounds his retreat however, and yanks him off the canvas. She throws him into a neutral corner, where he’s meant to crash stomach first into the turnbuckles. But Soul evades this fate by leaping onto the top rope. Unfortunatley he can do no more than that as Alix shoves out his legs and crotches him on the posts. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Alix flashes the smoke weed sign to a five year old in the audience, as she makes her way up behind Soul. The New Orleans native attempts to strike the Princess of Los Angeles with elbows, but Alix snuffs this effort out by trapping him inside an inverted facelock. From there she dives downwards and strikes Sweet with a top rope inverted DDT that pops the Detroit audience. The referee gets into position to count the pinfall… ONE! TWO! Rico breaks up the pinfall! This does not please Alix, and she gets her revenge by punting Rico in the stomach. This sends the South American through the ropes and tumbling to the floor. Reshifting her focus back to Soul, Alix heads for the ropes. But her ankle is grabbed by Queen Esther. ALIX Oooooooh a redhead! Lets see if the carpet matches the drapes! Alix exits stage left, and a now very panicked Esther runs away at top speed. Alix gives speedy chase , but is cut down by a lariat from Rico! The audience boos the attack, while pain shoots through Alix’s slender frame. COLE Alix couldn’t have seen that coming! COACH Even a smart person couldn’t have seen that coming, so imagine what a dumb one like her must have thought. Soul grabs Alix by her chocolate colored hair and throws her back into the ring. He follows The Hollywood Bad Girl back inside and applies the tag with Rico. The South American enters the ring to a ringing chorous of jeers. The Hellfire Club then hook onto Alix’s arms then raise her up, only to drop her back down onto their outstretched knees. Alix wails in an agony that only grows worse when Rico begins driving elbows into her sternum. COLE Brilliantly placed elbows by Rico De Janerio. Rico then hooks onto Alix’s bare legs for a cover… ONE! TWO! Kickout! COLE That double team could’ve put Alix away! COACH But damn if that girl didn’t kickout! I don’t know where these chicks get their toughness from but they got it. Rico takes his anger over the failed count out on Alix with stomps from his yellow and green boots. On the outside Esther revels in delight at the misery being brought to Alix. Even more pleasing to the English girl is Rico running to the COD corner and punching Krista in the face. COACH That wasn’t smart. Furious, Krista attempts to enter the ring to maim and maul her foe. But referee Hebner holds her back, distracting him from Lucius Soul’s entrance into the ring. Along with Rico, Soul takes Alix into a front facelock and brings her downwards with a double DDT! Alix’s head feels as though its been split open, ringing from the pain. COACH Maybe it was smart! Left in the ring, Soul attempts a pinfall on Alix… ONE! TWO! But The Hollywood Bad Girl throws her shoulder off the canvas. COLE So close, so close to a big upset. COACH Thank The Gunslingers, Mikey, they came in and crushed COD’s spirit, and now Rico and Lucius can finish the job in the name of the Cucaracha Kingdom. Soul picks Alix up by the back of her halter top and guides her to his corner, where he applies the tag with Rico. “DEPORT RICO! DEPORT RICO! DEPORT RICO!” SOUL Someone oughta deport your buck toothed, ho ass mamas! “BOOOOOOOOOOOO!” RICO (to Alix) Hey, chica, you want a mustache ride? ALIX RICO You for real? ALIX Rico is sent to heaven and beyond as Alix drops to her knees and gazes at him with green eyes burning with insatiable lust. RICO Come to Rico! What comes to Rico is a devastating headbutt to the groin! Both Alix and Rico fall backwards, each pained and exhausted from different ordeals. The fans now stomp and clap, trying their hardest to rally Alix to her corner. But Soul interferes with this plan, by rushing across the ring to slug Krista in the jaw! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” the fans his as Soul helps a now enraged Rico to his feet. They each tuck their head beneath Alix’s arms and then bridge her backwards to drive her into the canvas with a back suplex! The two men exchange high fives after that lethal attack, and laugh over Alix’s misfortune. As the audience continues to deride them, Rico climbs to the top rope. He waits patiently while Soul attaches Alix inside a front facelock. But whatever their planning goes disastrously awry as Alix shoves Soul against the ropes, crotching his partner! Queen Esther is beside herself with worry for Rico, as the fans are delirious with glee. COACH First the headbutt and now the turnbuckle, man, I don’t think anyone’s gonna be taking a mustache ride tonight! Alix makes the crucial tag to an outraged Krista! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Krista scales to the top rope, as Soul staggers about the ring. She then flings herself forward and her heels strike The Black Knight with a dropkick! Soul quickly comes back to his feet and his met with an inverted atomic drop. Krista then sweeps his legs out from under him. She holds his legs opens, wondering aloud if she should stomp his testicles or not. SOUL No, no, no HELL NO! “DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!” the Motor City faithful urge. KRISTA Sorry, buddy, you heard the fifteen thousand men, women, and transgendered. Krista stomps Lucius right in testicles! COLE Its been a painful night for the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club! The night may soon come to a close as Krista makes a pinfall effort…. ONE! TWO! Rico returns to the ring to break up the pinfall! But for his troubles he’s hammered with sharp kicks to the ribs then struck by a side effect! COLE That’s one Blond that Never Pays a Cover! Soul makes a desperate dash for Krista, aiming to clock her with a surprise shinning wizard. But he’s caught by Alix who spears him out the ring! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans delight as both competitors roll about the black outside mats in pain. COLE Wow! Folks, we’ll be back with more OAOAST Motor City Spectacular after this!COMMERCIAL Returning from break, Alix has battered Soul into the corner. But The Black Knight fights her back with kicks from his loafers. He then charges at Alix, but finds himself caught in position for a neckbreaker. His struggles for freedom are in vain, as Alix flips forward and hits him with a sommersault necbreaker! COLE Confessions of a Kristaholic here on the Motor City Spectacular! The fans continue to pop and cheer as Krista carries herself onto the top rope in the most booty revealing way possible. She wiggles her fine ass for the audience before coming off with a shooting star press! But Rico pulls his partner out the way, and Krista is left to suffer a disastrous crash into the rock solid ring mat. COACH That was great positioning by Rico. If he hadn’t been there this match would’ve been over. Alix dives out the ring to assail the meddlesome Brazilian. But he meets her arrival with punches to the stomach, before slamming her face into ring apron! He leaves Alix behind to cope with her miserey, and enters the ring to pummel Krista with stomps. Once finished with those attacks, he attempts a pinfall…. ONE! TWO! Krista makes a last second kickout. “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Krista tries make movements towards her feet, but is met with a sharp kick to the back from Rico. The sleazy Brazilian then brings Krista to her feet, where he attacks her lower back with stiff forearm shots. He then applies the tag to Lucius Soul. Working in unison they trip Krista up, then grab hold of her well insured legs. COLE Each man has a five million dollar leg in his hand! From there the two men bridge backwards and slingshot her into the ring posts. Krista falls backwards and writhes in a pain that’s increased by stomps from Soul’s loafers. SOUL A pimps work ain’t never done! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” the fans jeer as Lucius traps Krista within a surfboard. The pain is almost instanteous, a sharp ripping through Krista’s back. Soul tugs and pulls on her arms, wreaking havoc upon her lower back. COLE Such sound strategy, working on the lower back of Krista, slowing her down and hindering her movement. They really need to continue this plan of action. Right as Cole makes that point, Soul breaks the hold to stomp Krista in the face. COLE Or they can kick her in the face. Rico is brought back into the ring, and the Hellfire Club concocts another brutal double team. Soul lifts Krista up and dazes her with a roundhouse kick. With Krista out on her feet the two evil doers dash to the ropes. Rico returns to strike Krista with a high knee, while Soul goes low and takes out her ten million dollar legs with a chopblock. COACH Mikey, I think we’re heading for a big upset! COLE You always say that when Alix or Krista wrestle and you’re always wrong. Always. Rico strokes his legendary porn stache to the chagrin of the audience, and then drops his leg across Krista’s neck. Miss California coughs and wheezes, the damage done quite serious and painful. In celebration, Rico struts about the ring, stroking his pornstache and laughing at Krista. “LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA!” as the fans rally their heroine, Rico applies the tag with The Black Knight. The two men take to the opposite ropes, and when they return, they drop their legs across Krista’s body for a double dose of agony. Soul exits the ring, so that Rico may attempt a pinfall… ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Rico hooks the legs for a second pinfall…. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Krista’s show of toughness draws Rico’s ire, and he targets Krista’s lower back with vicious punches. Next he tags in Lucius Soul, who joins Rico for another double team. Each man crooks their elbows, then takes to the skies for leaping elbow drops that connect with Krista’s throat! The fitness queen rolls onto her stomach, clenching her fists in an effort to deal with the pain. COACH See, Mikey, a big upset is a’ comin’! COLE When pigs fly space shuttles to Pluto. Krista is brought to her feet by the former pimp and slung into the ropes. Soul makes the mistake of lowering his head too early, and Krista summons the strength needed to sunset flip him! But The Black Knight refuses to be brought down to the canvas, instead reaching out in a last ditch effort to tag Rico! He’s finally dragged to the canvas, but its much too late; Rico enters the ring and blasts Miss California in the back with a stiff kick. QUEEN ESTHER Yes, yes! This is just the most wonderful match I’ve ever been a part of! Rico picks the Los Angeles native up and traps her inside a rear waistlock. He grinds his crotch into her tush, which does little to enliven her dampened mood. It does anger her, however, and spurs her to make a charge to the ropes. But as they bounce off the cables Rico rolls her back into a pinfall! ONE! TWO! Krista pushes Rico off her, shoving the South American through the ring ropes. The fans cheer loudly as The King of Mardi Gras splatters on the black ring mats. COLE Can Krista make the tag? She’s so close to Alix she can taste her! COACH She wishes. Before Krista can gain relief, Rico rushes to the COD corner and yanks Alix off the ring apron! Alix isn’t able to lay a single hand on him, though, as Rico makes a speedy return back into the ring. Now inside he applies the tag to Soul, and the two Knights go after Krista with terrible stomps. COLE The double teaming in this match has gotten out of hand. You expect a double team or two in a tag match but not one every minute. Soul and Rico take hold of Krista’s million dollar legs and go for an old favorite by sling shotting her into the corner. But Miss California calls upon the physical resources needed to land atop the third turnbuckle! Without wasting any time she flips backwards and wipes out the Hellfire Club with a corckscrew moonsault press! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Krista desires to make a tag with Alix, but can find neither the strength nor the way to reach her. “LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA! LET’S GO KRISTA!” the fans sing, but can do nothing to spur on their fallen favorite. ALIX I really, really, gotta do something! Bingo Dingo! Ally cat has an idea! (turning to a front row fan) Give me your cellphone, or I’ll rape your women, enslave your children, and lay waste to your village, oh and I’ll also make you sit through a Christian Wright promo. The thought of having to set through one of Wright’s long winded ramblings is enough motivation for the fan to toss Alix his iphone. Alix furiously punches her numbers of choice on the iphone. Once completed there’s a vibrating sound that fills the ring. COACH Is that my cellphone? Is it your’s? KRISTA Yeowp! COLE It musts be Krista’s! Remember she had it before the match and tucked it away. With Krista’s phone set to vibrate and tucked neatly in her underwear the phone serves as a lets just say a stimulant, heating her inner core with its light touch. She whimpers as her desire increases, the turgid pulse of ecstacy cascading through her prone body like lightning. Her back arches, she pushes her hips towards the ceiling as she twists and turns upon the ring, lost in the need, the exquisite desire, so close to the brink of orgasm. Sweat drips down her forehead, her moans of pleasure dance through her pursed red lips. Krista’s carnal lust has reached epic proportions and her body quakes and pulsates as it rides massive waves of orgasmic pleasure from crest to trough. Damn that was good writing! ALIX Uh…Krista. Krista! Krista! Krista, you’re orgasming in front of half of Michigan! KRISTA Krista sheepishly crawls to her corner to make the tag with Alix! ALIX Party time! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” A BUTT bump is delivered to Rico, followed by a second to Lucius Soul! ALIX (singing) Get-up-get-up-get-get-down 911 rolled into your town! Following Alix’s oddly stated orders, both members of the Hellfire Club come to their feet. Alix grabs onto Rico’s arm and throws him into the corner. She follows him in with a corner avalanche, then wraps her arms around his head. ALIX Toot toot! Tugboat coming through! Toot toot! Soul doesn’t heed the warning and is struck in the jaw with a lariat, as Rico is driven downwards with a bulldog! As the two men moan in misery, Alix makes her way onto the second rope. She then flies forward and strikes them both with elbow drops! As the audience cheers her attack, she hooks onto Rico’s leg for a pinfall… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! But Soul punts Alix in the head! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Now its Alix’s turn to suffer a pinfall… ONE! TWO! Krista breaks the pinfall up with a running knee to Lucius’s face! The audience is overjoyed and wildly claps their hands for the brutal blow. But Krista hasn’t the time to celebrate as she’s tackled out the ring by Rico. Left behind, Alix makes a pinfall effort on Soul… ONE! TWO! Queen Esther steps into the ring, immediately distracting the referee. He tries to usher her back to the outside, but the Queen refuses to leave, claiming she must check the health of her royal knights. Rather than be miffed at the Queen’s presence, Alix gains an idea from it. ALIX Cute gown! Can I see? QUEEN ESTHER If you must, peasant. Alix innocently inspects the fabric of the dress, nodding and hmming to its touch. This lulls Queen Esther into a sense of smug comfort, which prevents her from stopping Alix from crawling up her mammoth gown! QUEEN ESTHER WHAT?! GET OUT FROM THERE, AT ONCE! ALIX It smells kinda funny in here…..Hey there’s Gary Coleman! What’s up, dude? QUEEN ESTHER QUIET YOU! GET OUT! GET OUT! GET….IS THAT YOUR FINGER?! IS THAT…OOOOOOOH GOOOOOOOOOD! All of Esther’s attention and feeling goes to that very private love button and the lustful music Alix plays there, a concentration of sensual sensation. Alix sends waves and waves of pleasure through Esther, making the very center of her undulate and scream out her surrender to the invading body. Esther screams in unbridled ecstasy, taken to the very heights of pleasure. Her legs come together, nearly crushing Alix, and a spasm contorts her body, like she is being electrocuted. COLE Oh my! Alix certainly has the magic touch tonight. Rico frees Queen Esther from her royal pleasure by pulling Alix out from beneath her skirt, tripping up Esther. Alix comes out with the Queen’s panties between her teeth. “YEAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans cheer the sight as Queen Esther passes out. RICO Who wants a mustache ride?! Alix shakes her head no, but her protests are ignored by Rico as he raises her up for the Razor Edge style powerbomb. But Krista emerges in front of him with her hands raised begging him to stop. KRISTA Rico, wait! RICO KRISTA I just wanna tell you about my girlfriend. Alix. She takes my money. When I’m in need. Yeah, she’s a trifling friend indeed. She’s a gold digger, way over town, that digs on me. Suddenly the Michigan State marching band appears on stage, beating out Kanye West’s gold digger. KRISTA (singing) Now I ain’t saying she a gold digger. But she ain’t messing with no broke broke. I ain’t saying she a gold digger but she ain’t messing with no broke broke. Get down girl, go ahead get down. Get down girl. Go ahead. Rico! RICO KRISTA Ummm….maybe you haven’t heard that one. You know life is sort of a mystery. Everyone must stand alone. I hear you call my name and it feels like home, Rico, it really does. The marching band switches into “Like a Prayer” KRISTA (singing) When you call my name, its like a little prayer, I’m down on my knees, I wanna take you there. In the midnight hour, I can feel your power, just like a prayer, I wanna take you there. Rico! RICO KRISTA Okay, so you haven’t heard that one either. Rico, I then I have to say a little prayer for you, buddy. The moment I wakeup before I put on my make up, do you know what I do? I say a little prayer for you. While combing my hair, and wondering what dress to wear now, I say a little prayer for you. The marching band shifts to “Say a little” prayer. If you don’t know these songs, you lost! KRISTA (singing) Forever, and forever, you’ll stay in my heart, and I will love you, forever, and ever, we never will part, oh how I love you….RICO GO FOR IT! RICO KRISTA Okay, what gives? You’re usually ready to bust out half the chorus of Mama Mia by now, what gives? SOUL My man got Ear plugs! Ear plugs, bitch! Now what you gotta say about that? KRISTA I don’t know, but I know what they might think… VOICES They tried to make me go to rehab but I said ‘no no no’ KRISTA Yes I been black but when I come back you’ll know know know. RICO VOICES I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine. They tried to make me go to rehab but I won’t go go go! To large applause the University of Michigan glee club appears on stage to serenade Rico with Rehab along with Krista KRISTA and THE CLUB (singing) I'd rather be at home with ray. I ain't got seventy days SOUL Fight it! Fight, Rico! KRISTA and THE CLUB (singing) Cause there's nothing. There's nothing you can teach me That I can't learn from mr Hathaway SOUL Fight it! Fight it! KRISTA and THE CLUB (singing) I didn't get a lot in class. But I know it don't come in a shot glass. Rico can fight it no more! He drops Alix and bursts into song! RICO (singing) They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'! Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know know know! I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine! He's tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go go go KRISTA and THE CLUB (singing) The man said 'why do you think you here' I said 'I got no idea I'm gonna, I'm gonna lose my baby so I always keep a bottle near' He said 'I just think you're depressed, this me, yeah baby, and the rest' RICO (singing) They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'! Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know know know! I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine! He's tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go go go Rico’s suddenly struck by a KIDology from Krista! “YEAAAAAAAAAA!” COLE Where did she come from? COACH What do you mean? She’s been standing in front of him singing the whole time! Krista fends off The Black Knight as Alix hooks Rico’s leg for a crucial pinfall…. CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO CROWD THREE!!!! DING DING DING DING The glee club fires back up Rehab as Buffer rises to make his victory announcement. BUFFER Your winner and new number one contenders for the One and Only World Tag Team Titles….CHICKS OVER DICKS! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!“ COLE Big upset, huh? If the Hellfire Club is a pitbull, Chicks Over Dicks must be Michael Vick ‘cause they killed them! For a sixth time! COACH Leave me alone. COLE In any event its Chicks Over Dicks who will now face The Lonestar Gunslingers at School’s Out! But will Mister Dick be carrying that world championship with him? That's the major question tonight. Let's throw it back to Terry Taylor. Terry, what's the mood of Tim Cash? The view switches to Terry Taylor standing outside a lockeroom. TAYLOR The mood of Tim Cash is very confident. He's relaxed, he's laughing, he's telling jokes. This is a man in the biggest match of his career, but he isn't nervous at all. He says he's waited all his life for a moment like this and he's just going to enjoy it. Mister Dick, on the other hand, is intense. He was nice to Mrs.Duncan, but that was an anomaly. He's shut out everyone but Malaysia, and he's very wound up. COLE It should be a hell of a match! COMING UP NEXT MONEY IN THE BANK BREIFCASE ON THE LINE LEON RODEZ VS BARON WINDELLSNEXT!COMMECIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 31, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2013 BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall... and it is for possession of the OAOAST Money In The Bank briefcase!"Oh (hey!), I've been travelin' on this road too long Just tryin' to find my way back home But the old me's dead and gone Dead and gone And oh (hey!), I've been travelin' on this road too long Just tryin' to find my way back home But the old me's dead and gone Dead and gone, dead and gone..." The opening to "Dead And Gone" by T.I. fades into "Numb" by Linkin Park, to a solid chorus of boos from the crowd. All sense of home state pride goes out of the window. No-one in Michigan wanting to admit pride in their own Leon Rodez, who skulks through the entrance way with his head down and a determine expression on his face. COLE Welcome home, Leon Rodez. Leon slowly makes his way down the aisle as the song meanders along. Around his right wrist, handcuffed, hangs the Money In The Bank briefcase in his stolen possession. Coming to a stop in the middle of the aisle, Leon looks up at the skies with a scowl on his face as the song suddenly erupts and the lights flash back and forth from purple to white static."I'VE BECOME SO NUMB I CAN'T FEEL YOU THERE BECOME SO TIRED SO MUCH MORE AWARE! I'M BECOMING THIS ALL I WANT TO DO IS BE MORE LIKE ME AND BE LESS LIKE YOU!" BUFFER Introducing first. From Grand Rapids, Michigan! Weighing in at two hundred, eighteen pounds... "THE FALLEN IDOL" of the OAOAST... LLLEEEEEOOOOOOOONN... RRRRRRROOOOOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZ!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Grasping the briefcase in both hands Leon climbs up the steps and enters the ring. Looking out at the crowd Leon shows disdain, not just for the people, but for the reaction he's on the end of. COLE These people once idolised Leon Rodez. These people more than any other. Once upon a time, it was normal to be proud of this young man. Not anymore. There's nothing to be proud about, regarding his actions as of late. Not least, the Money In The Bank briefcase, that he stole at AngleMania IX in a Ladder Match that he wasn't even a part of. Tonight, Leon has the chance to actually win that briefcase. But it comes against the man who's hands he essentially stole it out of... A huge orange pyro rocket erupts on the stage and "Thriller" by Fall Out Boy hits. The TV audience is shown an overhead view of the entrance stage, it's metallic floor carpeted by simmering flames that form the shape of a bull's head. The camera then pans down to reveal Baron Windels, Tag Team Title belt around his waist, throwing up the longhorns! BUFFER And his opponent! From San Antonio, Texas... weighing two hundred, sixty eight pounds. He is one half of the OAOAST World Tag Team Champions... "THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGER"... BBAAAAAAAARRRRROOOOOOONN... WWWIIIIIIIIIIIINNDDEEEEELLLLLLLSSSSSSSSS!!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" Baron reaches out and tags some hands on his way to the ring, not hometown but certainly more of a hero than his opponent. He makes his way into the ring and casts a disapproving look over at Leon, before turning to the crowd and throwing up the longhorns again. Baron removes his Tag Title belt and hands it to the referee, looking focused. COLE It's been a big month for Baron since AngleMania. He rebounded big by winning the World Tag Team Titles the very next episode of HeldDOWN~! And, where this gets really interesting... if Baron can win tonight and get the briefcase that would have been his in Las Vegas if not for Leon's treachery, then he has a contract for a shot at the World Champion... who, just happens to be his tag team partner, Mr. Dick. Before the match can start Charles Robinson is worried about the briefcase, still handcuffed to Leon Rodez. Producing a key from his kneepad, Leon eyes both Baron and Robinson carefully as he prepares to unlock his stolen property from his possession. COACH Guess Leon figures now he's got his match, he's safe handing the case back. COLE Well thankfully Leon had the sense to bring a key with him. I'd like to see him try and wrestle with a briefcase hanging from his wrist. As Leon unlocks the handcuffs, Baron goes over to his corner as Robinson takes the briefcase... COLE Wait, LOOK OUT! ...only for Leon to snatch it back and CLOBBER BARON IN THE SIDE OF THE HEAD WITH IT!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COLE Damnit, Leon using that briefcase as a weapon! Baron didn't see it coming! And I think Baron may have been busted open! Under a real interrogation from the referee, Leon barely pays a bit of attention as he picks the briefcase back up and hands it over, damage done. Robinson gets the briefcase out of the ring and checks on Baron, who is down, while Leon calmly walks over to his corner as if nothing happened and waits. Baron tries to get back up and is indeed bleeding from over the eye. "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" The words of his home crowd have no more of an effect on Leon as the referee's words, a blank look on his face as he waits in the corner. Robinson meanwhile shows concern for Baron and asks him if he wants to continue with the match or not. Baron, open wound and all, using the ropes to pick himself up and is determined to carry on. COLE And this is going to put Baron Windels at an immediate disadvantage. He's already busted open and the bell hasn't even rung! COACH Which means the ref can't do anything about it. Perfect. *DINGDINGDING* With Baron insisting he's okay the match finally starts and it starts with him being ambushed in the corner! Leon stomps Baron back into the turnbuckles, before targetting the cut with some hard right hands! Charles Robinson drags Leon off of his wounded opponent and warns him about the closed fists, to another blank stare. COACH Leon better watch himself now. I think this referee would love nothing more than to disqualify him. COLE Can you blame him!? Baron picks himself back up again, putting up his fists ready to fight. Picking his spot, Leon delivers a boot to the gut to cut Windels off and then drives a forearm into the side of head. Baron falls throat-first over the middle rope. Pressing him in, Leon then reaches over the top and starts DIGGING at the cut with his fingers!! "ONE!" "TWO!" "THREE!" "FOUR!" Breaking before five Leon backs away, not wanting to push his luck with the ref too far. COLE Leon is a man on the edge. A desperate man, desperate to be the World's Heavyweight Champion again. As Baron picks himself up by the ropes Leon takes aim and comes running in with a dropkick, catching Baron in the back and sending him through the ropes to the floor. Baron lands on his feet, slumped over the ring apron. So Leon follows him outside, taking a run down the apron to blast Baron in the head with a sliding kick!! "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!" Baron lays hurt against the steel steps, while Leon rolls back in under the bottom rope and demands that the referee start counting. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE And Leon is going to take this win any way he can get it! COACH Why not? A win's a win here, whatever it takes to get that briefcase for keeps. Screams of "COME ON BARON!" come from the stands, the Detroit crowd willing the big Texan to get back in. COLE Can you imagine Josie's reaction if Leon wins this match, via a countout? Leon hangs back and watches Robinson's count reach 5, with Baron still looking dazed on the floor. The Texan suddenly shakes off the cobwebs though, starting to pick himself up. Leon's head sinks a little. And as Baron stumbles over to the apron, beginning to climb back in at the count of 7, Rodez abandons the plans to get a cheap countout and grabs hold of Baron. Facelock applied, Leon tries to suplex Baron back in... but Baron blocks. COACH Uh oh. Trying again, Leon can't get Windels up, causing his mood to sink even lower. And things get a lot worse very quickly, as suddenly Baron lifts up Leon for a suplex, before proceeding to throw him BACK inside! Leon lands face and stomach first with a groan, to cheers from the crowd. COLE Counter by Baron! And now, can Baron get himself back into this match? After a moment to collect himself Baron heads for the top turnbuckle. He waits for Leon to get back up, then looks for the big flying Lariat... ...but Leon hits the deck and Baron crashes and burns!! "OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE No, nobody home! That may have been a crucial mistake by the bigman from San Antone. Leon quickly crawls over and hooks the leg on Baron... 1... 2... No! Leon jumps right back up and puts the boots to Baron, giving a cold stare to referee Charles Robinson as he tries to move him back. COLE And now Leon, back in control. Baron clearly still feeling the effects of that pre-match attack with the briefcase, missed with the high-risk move. A big gamble by Baron. And it didn't pay off. Waiting in the corner, Leon lines Baron up and delivers another sliding kick to the head, setting him up for another pinfall attempt... 1... 2... No! Leading Baron up by the arm Leon dishes out a couple of kicks to the ribs. Wringing the arm, he then places his foot underneath Baron's jaw, falling back and hitting the Soul Destroyer! Baron grabs the side of his bloodied head as he's forced down for yet another cover... 1... 2... No! Another kickout and this time Leon shows his frustration by swiping at the mat. "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" "LE - ON SUCKS!" COLE That little show of petulance from Leon has got this Detroit crowd on his back again. COACH I'd like to think that Leon's past the point of caring about these morons. But, getting booed in your hometown, that can't be fun. I wouldn't know, I'm essentially a god in Kansas, but I imagine it'd suck. Hands on hips Leon stalks around the ring, glare fixed on the fans. Baron gets back to his feet and manages to block a right hand, firing off with one of his own! Which only increases the noise in the arena. Leon throws another right, but Baron blocks again and fires back. So Leon rakes the eyes, then doubles Baron up with an MMA style knee strike to the stomach. COACH Boy, Leon put everything he had behind that. Baron's eyes practically fell outta his head! Baron drops to one knee, winded. By the hair, Leon drags the big Texan back up to run his face into the turnbuckles. He then rears back... *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" ...and dishes out a knifedge chop... which seems to wake Baron up a bit. *SLAP!* "WHOOOOOOOO!" Another chop connects and Baron stands bolt upright, with rage in his eyes. LEON (dejected) Goddamnit... Resigned to his fate, Rodez tries a right hand anyway, but Baron is again equal to it and starts to unload with big Texas sized rights of his own! Four, five, six right hands connect backing Leon to the middle of the ring. Baron then whips Leon back towards the corner and delivers a running clothesline! COLE Oh yeah, Baron! That adrenaline is flowing! Baron gives a call to the crowd and whips Leon all the way to the opposite corner. Charging in Baron then shins up his metal ass... ...AND MISSES! Leon dodges the ass bump in the corner and Baron leaps straight into a nasty collision with the turnbuckles! As he staggers out, Leon quickly hooks Baron up and executes a vertical suplex, floating over into the pin... 1... 2... No! COACH A little too much adrenaline, you reckon? COLE Well if there's anyone in the OAOAST who's capable of being a buzzkill, it's Leon Rodez. And he killed Baron's buzz dead right there. Not getting worked up over the count this time Leon clubs on Baron as he brings him back up. Whipped to the corner, Baron is then struck with the Superman Spear! COLE Leon does connect in the corner. Baron then falls into the clutches of The Fallen Idol, looking for an Exploder Suplex. But not having much luck. Baron delivers elbows to break free and falls back into the corner, drawing Leon into a raised boot to the jaw! COLE Ever since that pre-match bloodying, Baron has struggled to get any sort of momentum. But he's not going to quit on you, that's for damn sure. Shaking off the boot, Leon goes in with his shoulder to drive Baron back into the turnbuckles. A couple of thrusts with the shoulder soften Baron up and put Leon back in control. As he goes for an irish whip though, Leon is reversed on by Baron. The Texan lets Rodez get only as far as arm's length, before reeling him back in like a lasso, getting underneath Leon and launching him face-first into the top turnbuckle!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!" COLE But maybe that will turn the tide for big Baron! COACH He still looks wobbly Cole. Don't get your hopes up. As Leon stumbles out of the corner, Baron comes off the ropes and leaves his feet to deliver a BIG clubbing Lariat!! COLE BAM! Baron scores big with the Lariat! COACH Okay, maybe get your hopes up after all. Both men are down after that collision but it's Baron shows signs of life. He reaches out for the support of the crowd, while Leon is just lifeless in the centre of the ring. "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" "BA - RON!" As Robinson lays the count on, it's Baron to his feet first at the count of five. Leon is up a moment or two later, but immediately on the recieving end of some Texas sized right hands. After a flurry of shots, Baron whips Leon into the corner, hitting a clothesline. Baron then whips Leon to the other side of the ring and forces him to BITE MY SHINY METAL ASS!! COLE A little ass action, at the second time of asking! COACH If only it were that easy in real life. COLE Huh? COACH Huh? Leon stumbles out and walks into a Sidewalk Slam, Baron hooking back with the leg... 1... 2... NO! Rolling outside, Baron goes over to the corner and heads to the top rope again. COLE Another high risk from Baron. Will it pay off this time, or is this going to be another wasted roll of the dice? Baron reaches the top and throws up the longhorns to the Detroit crowd as he waits for Leon to turn around. Shaken up, The Fallen Idol does spot Baron and he turns around... right into the diving Lariat from the top!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE This time, It's Clobberin' Time! Cover by Baron... 1... 2... KICKOUT! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Baron takes some issue with the count, thinking that was it. COLE Just a half second away from Baron finally getting the Money In The Bank briefcase that he truly deserves. Whipping Leon into the ropes Baron sets himself and scoops Leon up, only for Leon to slip out of his grasp in mid-air. Landing on his feet, Leon quickly hits a back elbow, dazing Baron. With a 360 Leon then goes for a rolling sobat to the gut. But Baron deflects the boot away with his bare hands and catches the off-balance Michigan native with a hard right that has the Michigan crowd roaring. Baron then whips Leon back into the ropes and floors him with a Big Boot to the face! COLE Things are starting to come together finally for Baron Windels. Has he put it together when it counts? COACH Well, we thought that at AngleMania. And look what happened then. Baron waits for Leon to get up, ready to strike. Which he does, with a boot to the gut, setting up for the Brigham Young Cocktail. But as soon as Leon feels the facelock lock in he drops to one knee and clings onto Baron's leg desperately to block the move. COLE Baron going for it but Leon's got hold of the leg, like a toddler clinging onto it's mommy! After his attempts to shrug Leon off don't work Baron lets go and starts clubbing away at the back. Finally he prises Leon off of him, sending him crawling away for an escape. COLE Well Leon, obviously had Baron well scouted there... As Baron follows after Leon, The Fallen Idol suddenly springs to life and catches Baron with a flapjack, dropping him throat-first over the top rope! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH And Baron didn't have Leon well scouted there. Stalking the reeling Baron from behind, the sinister Rodez lies in wait, waiting for Baron to turn around... and BLASTING him in the face with a Superkick!! Baron stumbles and Leon follows it up with a back suplex, looking for the cover... 1... 2... NO, ONLY TWO! Leon puts his hand on his head and runs them down his disbelieving face. "LET'S GO BA - RON!" *clap clap clapclapclap* "LET'S GO BA - RON!" *clap clap clapclapclap* Glaring at his hometown crowd Leon suddenly fixes himself on Baron. He watches as the Texan starts to get back up and with a cold stare, he takes aim. COLE LOOKIT~! Lookit the look in the eyes of Leon Rodez! COACH Kill time! Baron gets to one knee, shaken. And Leon uncoils with the ONE HIT KI... ...NO! Baron ducks the foot! Coming up from his one knee Baron scoops Leon up in his arms and throws him across the ring with a Fallaway Slam!! COLE The Devil's Addiction, on the OAOAST's most devilish star! And now, Baron looking to put Leon away! Loading up with the arm Baron waves Leon back up, then hits the ropes. He takes aim and charges at Leon, who just has the presence of mind left to drop to the mat. Unfortunately, referee Charles Robinson doesn't do the same. And the result is a head-on collision which he doesn't come out on the better end of. "OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE OH! Referee Charles Robinson goes down, wrong place wrong time for him. As Baron checks on the referee, Leon tries to capitalise. Baron catches him with a Big Boot though and instinctively goes for a cover, for which there's no ref to count. COACH Wrong time for Baron too. Shoulda watched where he was going. Baron goes back to trying to revive the referee as a figure rushes down the aisle. Unfortunately not another referee, but instead MORGAN NERDLY, running down to check on Leon. COLE Uh oh. Somebody please get her out of here. No good can come of this. COACH I agree. Someone gonna get zapped up in here, or something. With no signs of movement from the referee Baron gives up and goes back after Leon, but turns around to find Morgan instead. Realising she's in an awkward position, the shivering girl stands her ground, trying to protect Leon. Baron orders her out of the way, but Morgan continues to stand in the way, just long enough for Leon to recover and leap out from behind her with an MMA knee! Baron buckles, as Leon rears back and delivers another knee... and another... and a third, bringing the big Texan down to his knees. Wiping the sweat from his eyes, Leon then turns to Morgan and gives her the orders, to hold Baron in place. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Hang on a minute. This is two on one, this is ridiculous! Morgan pins Baron's arms behind his back, as best someone of her diminuitive size can on a man so back. Taking his sweet time, Leon looks out at the booing crowd as he walks into position, then sets himself. But Baron has plenty of time to break free of Morgan and lunge out, punching Leon in the stomach! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE So much for that plan! Back up, Baron tees off on Leon, as Morgan looks on in shock. COLE Baron dishing out a Texas sized beating here! And all Morgan can do is look on. She ought to get out of there. COACH Yeah, Baron's not above hitting a woman I bet. A big right is ducked by Leon, but he runs right into a back elbow shot. As Leon stumbles back, Baron then turns and hits the ropes. Coming back, he then leaves his feet again with the big Lariat... ...and clobbers MORGAN, WHO GETS PULLED IN THE WAY BY LEON!!!!!!!!!! "OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" COACH SEE! SEE! COLE Di... did Leon just... Baron looks shocked at who ended up on the recieving end of his clothesline and makes the mistake of stopping to check on Morgan, allowing Leon to creep up behind and BOOT HIM BELOW THE BELT!!!!!!! COLE LOWBLOW! I... Falling to his knees, Baron is then lined up... and BLASTED with the rolling sobat to the face!!! COACH One Hit Kill! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Looking a very relieved man, Leon shakes out the cobwebs. He looks over at Morgan, then notices the referee stirring. And without a hint of worry for her condition, Leon drops down and start to logroll her motionless body out of the ring. ALL the way out of the ring, under the bottom rope, until she hits the arena floor with a splat! COLE Are... are you kidding me here!? Don't tell me Leon is going to steal the briefcase again! Like this!? Leon turns away from Morgan and with the referee coming to his senses, he drops down and hooks the leg on Baron... 1... 2... 3!!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" COACH Woah, ho ho ho! COLE Leon Rodez has robbed the Bank... AGAIN! *DINGDINGDING!* BUFFER Here is your winner, of the 2010 Money In The Bank briefcase... LLLEEEEEEOOOOOOOONN... RRRROOOOOOOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZZZZZ!!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"Almost cracking a smile, Leon sits up with sheer relief on his face. He quickly rolls over and crawls towards the timekeeper's side of the ring, DEMANDING the briefcase be handed to him. And the moment it is, he snatches it to his chest and bails out of the ring. COLE It's highway robbery, again, from Leon Rodez! An ambush before the bell, sacrificing the referee, sacrificing the one person in this entire world that seems to genuinely care for him... there were no depths that Leon would not sink to, in order to leave his home state with that briefcase! None! Retrieving his handcuffs, Leon's immediate concern is to get the briefcase secured back around his wrist, as soon as possible. The jeers of the crowd ring closer in his ears but he has complete tunnel vision with the briefcase, which once snapped around his arm he drags away like a thief in the night. Only stopping to scoop up the lifeless body of Morgan Nerdly and drag her away in his other arm. COLE Leon Rodez is a desperate man. And a desperate man, capable of doing desperate things, is a dangerous man to be holding that guaranteed contract, with his name on it. COACH I tell you what, if you want a reason not to be the World Champion right now... that might just be it. Leon hauls out the briefcase and the lifeless Morgan, as in the ring Baron is attended to by the referee, still unaware of what just happened to him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 31, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2013 The lights dim and the spotlight shines mid-ring on Michael Buffer. * DING * DING * DING * DING * BUFFER This is your main event of the evening! Scheduled for one fall and sanctioned by the OAOAST, it’s for THE HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE WORLD! Are you ready? “YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” BUFFER Detroit, Michigan… ARE… YOU… READY? "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BUFFER Then for the thousands in attendance and the millions watching around the world… Ladies and gentlemen… LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLET'S GET READY TO RRRRRRRRRRRUMMMMMMBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! “It‘s Not My Time” by 3 Doors Down cues and Tim Cash happily scrolls to the ring. BUFFER Introducing first, the challenger… from Peoria, Illinois... weighing 220 pounds… wrestling's last real good guy... TTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMM CCAAAAAAASSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHH!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Being the good guy that he is, Cash waves and poses for pictures with fans. COLE We could all use a little Tim Cash inside of us. COACH You’re right about that, Cole. Cash is little and you’d love him inside of you. *laughs* COLE (no sells Coach’s remark) As you can see, ladies and gentlemen, Baron Windels is not present ringside. He’ll be watching this one backstage on a monitor. COACH Yeah, rather than go out on a limb and pick a side. Obviously he wants to ride the winner’s coattails. “Motherfucker of the Year” by Motley Crue hits as golden pyro shower Mister Dick and Malaysia. BUFFER And his opponent, accompanied by MALAYSIA… from San Antonio, Texas, weighing 238 pounds… one-half of the One & Only World tag team champions, here is the reigning and defending OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion… MMMIIIIIIIIIIISSSSTTEEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" MD takes a seat in the corner and spanks the World title, which dangles out of the front of his short shorts. Malaysia then crawls over on all fours and removes the World title with her teeth. COLE Did somebody crank up the heat? It sure got hot out here. COACH Something’s up alright, but it’s not the heat. Referee Earl Hebner grabs possession of the belt and holds it high for all to see. COLE And there you see the richest prize in the game today, the OAOAST World Heavyweight Title. * DINGDINGDING * Cash greets MD with a big smile and his hand extended, but MD has other ideas in mind. Like a series of right jabs. COACH When Mister Dick said he wasn’t going to treat Cash any differently because of their mutual friendship with Baron Windels, he wasn’t lying. MD whips Cash in for a PRESS SLAM, then to the corner for his trademark CROSS BODY SPLASH… but Cash moves and MD gets hung across the top rope! Cash follows with a series of kicks to the midsection that causes MD to CROTCH himself! MISTER DICK ENZIGURI knocks MD to the arena floor where he crashes against the guardrail following a SUICIDE DIVE! COLE Tim Cash in full control. Cash rolls MD back in and receives a FACIAL~! COACH Pow! Right in the kisser! MD goes out after Cash and shoves him into the RINGPOST. Cash stumbles around ringside until MD rams him face-first into Cole’s crotch! Again! And again! COLE Cole’s pleasure turns to pain as Malaysia steps on his pubes after MD tosses Cash inside. COACH MD paintbrushes Cash and then delivers an atomic drop, the prelude to the clothesline from hell… but Cash ducks under and takes MD down in a CRUCIFIX! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Both men pop up, MD whiffs on a Stiff Kick and gets drilled by a BACKBRAIN WHEELKICK! Cash scales the buckles as MD staggers to his feet and scores with a MISSLE DROPKICK! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Via split-screen we see Baron Windels jump out of his seat as Cash whips MD in for an old school SLEEPER HOLD, but MD goes behind and executes a DIVING FULL NELSON SLAM! COLE Pure Penetration! Rather than go for the cover MD delivers a HEADBUTT TO THE GROIN, which he claims was to the midsection when scolded by the referee. COACH The OAOAST Champion just being a dick. MD introduces Cash violently to the turnbuckle, then works him over in the corner with numerous jabs. MD whips Cash across and successfully delivers a CORNER CROSSBODY! COLE Bite My Giant Dick! COACH I’ll pass. Thank you very much. Cash stumbles out into a STIFF KICK! The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Noticeably frustrated, MD dumps Cash outside and flings him against the steel steps, then slams him hard on the arena floor. COLE You can feel the intensity level picking up as this match goes longer and longer. MD rolls inside and the ref starts a 10 count. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! Cash rises to his knees and grabs the bottom rope, only to go back down after being kicked square between the eyes. But at least it restarts the count. Unfortunately it also leads to Malaysia’s involvement as she levels Cash with a forearm smash. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Oh, come on. Was that really called for? Malaysia again tries to deliver a cheap shot, but this time BARON WINDELS runs out to stop her. "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BW shoos Malaysia away, then receives an earful from MD who questions why he’s ringside. COACH Well, at least Baron Windels finally took a side. He’s pulling for Tim Cash. COLE I don’t know about that. Clearly he wants the bout to remain free of interference though. MD looks to suplex Cash back in from the apron, but Cash nails MD in the midsection with a shoulder and performs a SUNSET FLIP! ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Cash executes a hip toss, then a belly-to-belly suplex. The cover. ONE! TWO! KICKOUT! Cash goes for THE MIDWEST SLING but gets wrapped in a SMALL PACKAGE! ONE! TWO! NO, KICKOUT! MD whips Cash in for a press slam, but Cash floats over and delivers a KNEE BREAKER INTO BACK SUPLEX, followed by THE MIDWEST SLING! COLE Are we about to see the greatest upset in OAOAST history? Malaysia apparently fears so and hops on the apron… but so too does Baron Windels. COACH He’s gonna hit a woman, Cole. Cash immediately breaks the MWS to defuse the situation between BW and Malaysia, which allows MD to shove Cash into BW/Malaysia and rolls him up! ONE! TWO! THR-- NO, KICKOUT!! COLE It’s not over yet! How Cash managed to kick out I’ll never know. What grit being displayed by wrestling’s last real good guy. Woozy from the previous collision Cash falls prey to a new move from MD… THE JACKHAMMER! ONE! TWO! THREE!!! * DINGDINGDINGDING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winner of the match… and still OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion… MMMIIIIIIIIIIISSSSTTEEEERRRRRR DDIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCKK!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Though mostly a loud ovation, more than a few boos can be hard. COLE A valiant effort by Tim Cash, but it wasn’t enough to walk out of here tonight the new World Heavyweight Champion. Malaysia hands MD the World title and he poses over his defeated opponent, prompting BW to gently push him away. They exchange words until MD decides to walks off. COACH What’s that idiot doing interrupting Dick’s celebration? BUTT hurt over Cash’s defeat? COLE It’s pretty obvious to me BW just wants Jock to show a little sportsmanship. There’s no need to pose over Tim Cash. In any event, Mister Dick is still the World Heavyweight Champion. COD are now the #1 contenders to the One & Only World tag team championship held by Mister Dick and Baron Windels, who just moments ago had a very public argument. COACH I just saw a man celebrating a successful title defense. COLE You only see what you want. But we thank all of you at home for watching the Motor City Spectacular live on TSM in the United States and on The Pit up in Canada. We certainly hoped you enjoyed the show as much as we did. Be sure to join us again next week as HeldDOWN~! comes to you from San Francisco. © 2010 OAOAST Entertainment Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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