OAOAST IntenseZone - 12/23/02

[Chanel #99]

A dark room, covered in it’s own filth. Dirt, dust, and other substances coat the walls and floors. No five-second rule here, something hits the floor, it stays there. A single, solitary light shines down from the ceiling, onto its two captives. Two young men, both in their low 20’s, skinny and muscular, physically fit, are bound and gagged in two chairs. Both of these men, however, are wearing XPW t-shirts.

And then Satan himself steps into the room. A short man, only around 6 feet. He too is skinny, though his muscles and skin are covered in scars, battle scars from wars in which no one wants to fight. Save the man with the scars, of course. He carries a bag into the room, as he places his arms through the straps to hold the bag over his back. The man slaps both of the captives to consciousness, a place where they will not be for long.

“Wake up cunts. Wake the fuck up.”

Sandman9000 reigns down more open-hand blows to the faces of Josh Prohibition and M-Dogg 20. Both men try to duck and avoid the blows, but that just leads to Sandman hitting them harder.

“Come on, you little sellout bitches, wake the fuck up.”

Josh and M-Dogg are fully awake now. They are completely unsure of where they are, but they know that they cannot move, and the person holding their lives in his demented hands is standing in front of them, in an aWo shirt, using two aWo bandanas as a make-shift mask, as he always does.

“You know what, I was gonna go on this large speech about why you two shouldn’t have done what you did, but fuck that. Both of you two little sellout bitches stabbed CZW in the back for that porno company. I could just let you suffer over there, but fuck that, I’m in a violent mood. I’m gonna tear up both of you little pathetic spot-blowing pieces of shit.”

Sandman pulls the bag back from around his back, and pulls a weedwhacker out. Sandman pulls on the cord, bringing the instrument of death to life.

“I swore, after the I Quit match, that I would never use this again. I’ll make an exception for you two.”

The camera turns away as the sounds of flesh tearing, inhuman screaming, and blood splattering fills the air.

[Chanel #99]

JR:"And after that, er...well, let's go right now to a special announcement!"

BILL WATTS

For those wondering, no I'm not dead. I've been dealing with OaOast matters as of late so I haven't been around much. But be ensured, I'm watching all the shows. Which is why Big Poppa Popick has been fined $50,000 for his attack on Tony last week. Even though he has denied any wrong doing. With that said, enjoy the rest of the show.

[Chanel #99]

OAOAST North American Title

"Hells Bells" by AC/DC hits as El Dandy makes his way to the ring. The crowd is going wild.

The "Ban Agnes" chants begin as "Pools of Fear" hits. Angle-Plex makes his way out from the back with his OAOAST North American Title around his waist. He enters the ring. Before the bell rings, AP gets a mic.

Angle-Plex: Before you ring that bell, there's something I have to say. Dandy, I saw you put brass knuckles in your tights before you walked out here. Now if you think you're going to cheat to beat me, you've got another thing coming. So ref, go check Dandy's tights. I don't want to get screwed out of a title I earned.

The ref walks over to check Dandy's tights. Dandy is shaking his head. The ref says he didn't find any weapons. He motions for the bell to ring.

Angle-Plex: No way. This is bull. You didn't check good enough. He probably paid you to let him win, since he knows he can't beat me in a fair match. Don't ring that bell yet. I want another ref to come out here and check Dandy better than this guy did.

The crowd, wanting the match to begin, starts throwing trash into the ring. Another ref rushes down to the ring to check Dandy's tights. While he is checking, the monster JINGUS and Mystery Eskimo run down the isle and jump into the ring. They start attacking El Dandy! AP, MME, and JINGUS laying a beating on Dandy! Dandy tries to fight back, but he is out-numbered!

Spiderpoet runs down the isle and starts helping his partner fight the three cowards off. Dandy clotheslines MME over the top, sending them both out of the ring. JINGUS and SP are brawling in the ring, while Plex is standing in a corner. JINGUS picks SP up, over his head, and throws him out of the ring. JINGUS climbs out of the ring to continue his brutal assault. MME and Dandy are brawling in the crowd.

Thunderkid runs out of nowhere and jumps into the ring. AP turns around right into a THUNDERBOLD DDT~! The crowd is going nuts! Road Agents run out and break up MME/JINGUS and SP/Dandy. Thunderkid is walking up the isle and into the back, as Angle-Plex lays on the mat.

AP slowly gets up and gets a mic.

Angle-Plex: Thunderkid! You get back out here!

Thunderkid walks out from the back with a smile on his face. Road Agents stand between him and the ring, hoping to stop another fight from starting.

Angle-Plex: That's it, Kid! Every week for the past few weeks, I've had a match, and you've hit me with a cheap shot! Well come Bloody, Battered, and Beaten, you have to face me one on one. Man to man. No more cheap shots. We'll see who the better man is! And I KNOW that I am! I've worked to long and hard to lose this title to someone like you!

Thunderkid's runs toward the ring, but the road agents and officials stop him. Agnes and Thunderkid stare at each other as IZ goes to commercial.

[Chanel #99]

Backstage, Zack Malibu is living it up, walking around with a Santa hat on his head, when Michael Cole comes wandering up to him.

ZM:"Let me guess, you want your present now?"

MC:"Um, no. It's interview time."

ZM:"Ah, a present for the Prepophiles out there!"

MC:"For the who?"

ZM:"Prepophiles, MC, NOT Pedophiles. For Pete's sake man, keep your mind out of the gutter!"

MC:"OK, NEW topic...how do you feel about being locked in a 20 foot cage, a Hell In The Cell, in just a few short days when you do battle with CWM?"

ZM:"You know Cole, you really know how to ruin someone's Christmas spirit. Truth is, I'm wary. I'm being cautious. You might even say scared. Not because of the structure. Certainly not because of CWM. But because of what will happen when we're in there together."

MC:"What are you saying?"

ZM:"I'm saying that it's all coming to a head...this thing between he and I, yeah it's laid low for a while, but it's still there. The pain, the hostility, the rage bottled up inside us both...who knows if even Hell In A Cell can contain it."

MC:"So how would you handle it Zack?"

Zack sighs, and hesitates before he speaks.

ZM:"It's kinda like Eminem's song, Cole. In order to win this match, you just have to lose yourself."

That being said, a now somber Zack Malibu walks away, leaving Cole somewhat disturbed by his last comment.

[Chanel #99]

"Short Stories With Tragic Endings" hits with no lighting effects, and Spider Poet makes his way down to the ring. He's all smiles, wearing a santa hat and red tights with green web designs on them. Very festive.

JR:"Well, this young man is certainly festive despite a run-in with the tag champs a bit earlier!"

He slides in the ring and plays to the crowd for a few minutes before taking a mic from the announcer and looking around.

SP: Well now, looks like it's that time of year, kids. When presents are under the tree, candy stuffs our stockings, and family comes together for yet another huge meal, not unlike Thanksgiving! And you know, we here in the OAOAST are like a family. A very . . . dysfunctional family, but hey, in this day and age, whose family *isn't* dysfunctional, right? And you know, just like alot of you, the ol' Spidah Po' has a couple of family members that just really get under his skin. Like crazy Uncle Jack that hits the sauce too hard - and I don't mean gravy - and screwy Aunt Frankie that isn't sure exactly which side of the tree hir garland is on, if you catch my drift, we here in the OAOAST have our own odd couple. But, we love 'em anyways! So, as a special Holiday gift, I put together this little video package for our very own nutty pair, Uncle JINGUS and Aunt Mystery Eskimo!

Roll that beautiful bean footage! Um . . . I mean, play the bloody tape . . .

*cut to video* http://mm.dfilm.com/mm2s/mm_route.php?id=660639

*cut to the audience laughing, and SP going over the top with his own laughter, stomping about the ring, doubled over*

SP: As you can see, *laughs*, it's a good thing that I got out here with a mic before monster boy or --

JINGUS is in the ring before SP even realizes it, having come through the crowd! He spins Poet around and wraps his huge hands around the smaller man's neck. The Devilman hauls SP up and SLAMS HIM DOWN, seemingly with the intent of putting the man through the mat. JINGUS picks up the discarded microphone and kneels down beside the dazed SP. He looks at the Mic, and looks back to SP, and repeats it several times, apparently formulating something dastardly. Finally, he reaches down, and forces SP's mouth open wide, and starts trying to literally SHOVE THE MIC DOWN HIS THROAT! Gasping and teeth grinding can be heard over the speakers, a sickening sound to be sure.

Fighting to keep his jaw from breaking, SP lashes out with his right fist and clocks JINGUS on the side of the head. As JINGUS shakes it off, SP quickly rolls away and tries to get to his feet. No sooner is this barely accomplished than JINGUS charges him! SP ducks, however, spins, and hits JINGUS with a SUPERKICK! The Devilman is down, if only momentarily. Seeing an opportunity, SP scrambles over to the corner, bending over to pick his hat up off the mat on the way. As he climbs to the top, he pulls it on snug and points to the stirring JINGUS and to the audience, and seems to enjoy the rising volume. With a grin, he leaps up and arches back, flipping over and landing the SPIDAHSAULT~!, and quickly sliding under the ropes for a quick exit. SP grabs a mic from under the ropes and starts backing up the ramp, holding his sore jaw and pointing.

SP: Merry Christmas, Jingy Bells. I got one more present for you, but it'll have to wait for Bloody, Battered, and Beaten. It's a big ol' table, with your name on it. Make sure and polish up those belts real nice, cuz Dandy and I are ringin' in the new year with Gold.

As JINGUS looks on with seething disgust, SP points at him with a big grin and makes his way behind the curtain.

[Chanel #99]

::The lights go out, and a familiar drum beat plays the loud speakers. 'This Means War' kicks in for the first time in months, and the fans go absoloutely

apeshit.

JR-'By God, it's Caboose! He's here tonight!'

Jesse-'What The Hell?!?!'

JR-'He must be here to answer Naz Mistry's questioning of his loyalties!'

Jesse-'Good, cos I want to know on which side of the trench Caboose stands.'

Caboose walks out onto the rampway dressed in all black, with his face painted black and white, with a solitary spotlight shining on him. Caboose walks to

the ring, climbs to the second rope. As the lights come on Caboose strikes his famous glare at the crowd, who are still cheering wildly.

Caboose steps down from the second rope and walks over to The Fink, who hands his mic over to Caboose with a look of fear in his eye. Caboose walks to the

centre of the ring and begins to speak...

Caboose-'Just like Big Poppa Popick, you fans are too easily fooled...'

Caboose peels away his face paint and takes off his wig to reveal none other than Naz Mistry! The crowd erupts into boos!

JR-'Son of a bitch! Who does he think he is?!'

Jesse-'Quiet JR, Naz has demonstrated how easy it is to pull the wool over these stupid redneck fans.'

Naz-'See what I mean? I told you Caboose had tricked you all into believing he was some kind of saviour, just like he's tricked Big Poppa Popick! And to tell

you the truth it isn't that hard, so I can understand how Caboose has pulled it off so easily.'

(Crowd Boos)

Naz-'I come out dressed up as that has-been Caboose in one of my old Positively Caboose outfits, and you idiots go insane. Just how gullible are you people?'

(Crowd Boos)

Naz-'I'm telling you fans, Caboose is not here to save the OAOAST! He is here to join up with his old friends the aWo, so they can all destroy the OAOAST!

You have to believe me!'

(Crowd Chants Bullshit)

JR-'I'm inclined to agree with the fans.'

Jesse-'Your inclined to shut up when Naz Mistry is talking.'

JR-'Do you people not remember who Caboose is? How many times do I have to explain it? Caboose is friends with no one. He turned his back on the aWo god

knows how many times. He turned his back on the Deadly Alliance, he turned his back on the OAOAST. He even walked out on his beautiful wife! He cannot be

trusted or relied upon! Caboose is bad news!'

(Crowd chants 'Shut-Up and wrestle!')

Suddenly BPP walks out without his music even playing and marches straight to the ring, as the crowd cheers.

BPP grabs the mic out of Naz's hand and starts to talk.

BPP-'For the love of god won't you shut up?!'

(Crowd Pops)

BPP-'Every f***ing week you come out here and you babble on about Caboose this, and Caboose that! The man hasn't even returned yet and you can't shut up

about him siding with the aWo! Newsflash boy, Caboose is twice, no thrice, hell ten times the man you'll ever be, so shut your stupid mouth, before I do. Or

worse yet for you, Caboose drops from the rafters and breaks your face with his cricket bat!'

(Crowd pops huge)

Naz pauses, takes the mic back from BPP, who shoots Naz a stern look.

Naz-'Well, well, well if it isn't Caboose's biggest fan paying his fanboy homage to that piece of scum...'

BPP gives Naz a straight right to the face!

Naz goes down like a sack of potatoes and the crowd roars it's approval.

JR-'Oh Hell Yeah! It's about time someone shut that little whiner up!'

Jesse-'BPP just can't deal with the truth.'

BPP looks at Naz and steps out of the ring, Naz pulls himself together and picks up the mic.

Naz-'Hey Poppa, if you wanna walk into Caboose's trap, fine go ahead, don't say I didn't warn you. If you want to end up in the same place you did the last

time you trusted Caboose.'

BPP shrugs his shoulders.

Naz-'BPP take a look at the AngleTron, I'm sure you'll never forget that night...'

::Footage of the finish to BPP Vs. AnglePlex from Beach Brawl...

The crowd pops loud as BPP looks up…this could be the end…BPP up top for what looks like to be a shooting star press. The crowd is on its feet…as CWM hits

BPP from behind with a tire iron…BPP falls down and right into AP's waiting arms…ANGLE-PLEX! 1…2…3!!!!!!! (Huge pop)

JR: YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! Angle-Plex won! He's reinstated!

Tony: What was that?! He cheated, Ross!

Gary: The winner of the match, and now reinstated -- Angle-Plex!

The aWo will now get 5 minutes alone inside a steel cage with Big Poppa Popick.

The cage lowers as the rest of the aWo comes out…Celes is distraught on the outside and is being restrained by Bill Watts. CWM brings in his trusty

tire-iron, while AngleSault brings in two chairs…

JR: Bill Watts is holding back that witch...Oh, my! The aWo are bringing in weapons.

Tony: This is going a little too far.

BPP looks around, and realizes he's outnumbered…AnglePlex gets a chair from AS, and goes to hit BPP, who moves and kicks the chair into AP's face.

JR: BPP moved. AP got a chair right in the face.

CWM attacks BPP, but gets thrown right into the cage…BML with a wrapup of BPP, and SomeGuy goes for the SomeKick, but BPP moves, and BML gets SomeKicked!

Tony: BPP might get away.

But whack! Anglesault nails BPP in the head with a chair. CWM recovers and pulls out two pairs of handcuffs…and the aWo handcuff BPP to the cage…Ange-Plex

gets his chair back, and and bloodies BPP with a vicious chairshot. There's another as the 5 minutes ends…but they can't raise the cage because BPP is

handcuffed to it.

Tony: Why isn't the cage being raised?

JR: BPP is still handcuffed to the cage.

CWM comes in with a tire-iron shot to the skull, which finally knocks BPP out. Bill Watts calls for officials from the back and wrestlers to help get the

cage door off to get in there…AS holds a chair to BPP's face…BML hits a dropkick onto BPP's face.

Tony: I've had my troubles with both men, but c'mon. The 5 minutes are up.

CWM with a tire-iron shot to the crown jewels of BPP…who is just slumping against the cage…The officials start to enter the cage but are held back by the aWo

as AP and AS hit a con-chair-to BPP…Celes is screaming on the outside as the aWo lay in as many shots as they can before the head of the Board of Directors

-- Bill Watts, OaOast officials and Tony "The Body" separate them...

JR: Bill Watts called Tony into the ring to help clear things up. Wow. BPP may be seriously hurt. No doubt he has a concussion.

Medical personnel arrive on the scene and Bill uncuffs BPP, who slumps to hit the mat…Celes comes in and holds the battered head of Popick, who has no idea

where he is at.

JR: Celes is almost in tears, as her man doesn't know where he is.

I'm being rejoined by Tony.

Tony: I'm not a doctor, but BPP probably has a concussion. Looks like he'll need stitches as well.

The aWo makes their way up the ramp…too boos...::

Naz-'You were the leader of the Deadly Alliance back then, and Caboose was second in command. Yet when you were receiving the beating of a life time from the

aWo, the men Caboose claimed to hate so much, where was Caboose? Why didn't he lower from the rafters and save your ass then? Why didn't he lead the rest of

the Deadly Alliance, AlfDogg and Sandman to your aid? Hold on a second Sandman is now in the aWo as well isn't he? You think maybe it was a plan all along

on?Caboose, Sandman and the aWo really stitched you up didn't they?

Well I'll show you exactly where Caboose was when that happened. Roll the footage...'

::Black And White Security footage from July 14th 2002, Beach Brawl.

Caboose sits on a chair, watching a monitor showing BPP getting beaten down, as he polishes his World Title::

Naz-'BPP, can you rely on Caboose? Let alone trust him? Can any of us trust the man who left you, his own ally to be brutally attacked by the men he claimed

to hate? I don't think so.'

Naz drops the mic as BPP stares at the frozen image of Caboose polishing his belt while watching BPP getting beaten down.

(The crowd become subdued)

Jesse-'You have to admit JR, Naz makes a lot of sense'

JR-'I don't know what to think?'::

[Chanel #99]

"The Wall" by Kansas hits as the lights in the arena go out. People take out thier lighters as the strobe lights go on. Alf walks out from behind the back and poses in the isle as pyro goes off all around him. He starts walking down to the ring.

(Cut to OAOAST Replay. In the bottom right-hand corner of the screen it say "Last IntenseZone". After the Superstar/Alf match, Anglesault rushes to the ring and blindsides Superstar. He continues to stomp away at him, until Alfdogg returns and sends Anglesault packing with a chairshot to the back of the head, and a clothesline out of the ring! As the aWo retreats, Alfdogg grabs the DA shirt away from Superstar and stares a hole in him. Then he hands the shirt to Superstar personally, and shakes his hand! The crowd erupts as the newest member of the Deadly Alliance gets his hand raised by the leader. )

Alf poses on a turnbuckle and plays to the crowd. "Downfall" hits as Superstar walks to the ring to join his partner. Alf gives Superstar a high-five as the letters "a", "w", "o" appear on the titantron. The screen goes red, white, and blue as Sandman walks out from behind the curtain. He points to the entrance s the OAOAST World Champion, Anglesault, walks out. He wears his belt around his waist. The aWo members walk down to the ring while insulting the fans along the way. Sault jumps into the ring first. Superstar tells Alf that he wants a piece of Sault. Alf and Sandman stand in their repective corners as Sault and Superstar start the match.

DING DING DING!

AS and Superstar run toward each other and lock-up. AS, using his weight to his advantage, launches Superstar into his corner. He turns to Sandman and smiles. Superstar quickly gets back up. He runs at Sault, and dropkicks him right into the aWo member's own corner. AS gets up and shakes it off. Superstar tells AS to bring it. AS talks a little trash, then tags out to Sandman. Sandman runs at Superstar and attempts a clothesline. Superstar ducks, and dropkicks Sandman's leg. Sandman falls to the mat holding his knee. Superstar starts to stomp on the leg. Tag to Alf.

Superstar lifts Sandman off the ground, as him and Alf execute a DOUBLE SUPLEX~! Alf goes for the cover, but Sandman kicks out at 2. Spinebuster! Sandman holds his head. Alf picks Sandman up.....T-Bone Suplex! Sandman uses the rest of his energy rolling out of the ring. Anglesault runs into the ring and knocks Alf down with a right hand. Superstar climbs onto the turnbuckle and hits a cross-body on AS! Sault quickly gets up and starts yelling at Superstar! They look like they are going to kill each other when the ref breaks the 2 up and tells them to get out of the ring. Alf walks over to the ropes to get Sandman. Sandman smashes Alf in the head with a chair he got from under the ring. He rolls into the ring as the ref looks down at a barely concious Alf.

Sandman pins Alf, and puts his feet on the ropes. The ref begins to make the count, but he notices Sandman's attempt to cheat. He pushes Sandman's legs off the ropes. Sandman gets up and starts yelling at the ref. Alf slowly gets up, and hits a release dragon suplex! Sandman hits the mat hard. He starts crawling over to his corner to tag his partner, while Alf does the same. Sandman makes the tag to AS! Alf reaches out to tag Superstar, but Sault pulls him back to the middle of the ring.

Anglesault picks Alf up....belly-to-belly suplex! He doesn't give Alf a chance to breathe as he runs over to Alf's almost unconcious body and locks in a crossface. Alf begins pooring blood thanks to the chairshot from Sandman earlier. Alf reaches for the ropes....and gets them! The referee forces Sault to break the hold. AS pulls Alf up and delivers another belly-to-belly suplex. He walks over to Alf again, with a smirk on his face. Alf hits a low-blow! Sault goes down! Alf starts crawling over to his corner. Sandman runs into the ring, but the ref tells him to get out. Tag to Superstar!

Superstar runs into the ring and start hitting Sault with right hands. The ref tells Superstar to get out of the ring! He didn't see the tag! The crowd is pissed. Alf staggers back into the ring. AS hits another overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Alf is hurt. AS tags Sandman. Sault holds Alf up and Sandman gets ready to hit a big right hand. Sandman punches....but Alf ducks! AS gets laid out by Sandman's punch. Alf dropkicks Sandman into his corner. Alf uses all his energy to run to his corner. He makes the tag! Superstar runs into the ring clotheslines Sandman out of the ring.

Alf and Sandman start brawling on the outside. Anglesault is left alone with Superstar in the ring. The two start talking trash, then start exchanging punches! Sandman throws Alf into a ringpost on the outside. He gets in the ring and low-blows Superstar. AS and Sandman start beating on Superstar! Alf gets a chair and rolls into the ring. He hits Sandman over the head. AS rolls out of the ring quickly. AS and Sandman regroup halfway up the entrance ramp. Superstar gets a chair of his own, as he and Alf stand in the ring. Superstar gets on a microphone.

Superstar: Why don't you two pussies get in this ring, and let finish this match!

Anglesault and Sandman start whispering to each other, then slowly start to walk to the back. Alf and Superstar runs out of the ring and up the ramp. DOUBLE CHAIRSHOT~! Cobainwasmurdered and Angle-Plex quickly run out to help their fellow aWo members. Superstar and Alf don't move an inch, and tell the two aWo members to bring it. Anglesault and Sandman run up the ramp. The 4 aWo members are at the top of the ramp, looking down at Superstar and Alf as IZ goes off the air...WAIT...

BPP steps out of his office but is hit by chair by a man dressed like Santa.

SANTA

Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Holidays, Big Poppa Popick.

Santa takes off his beard, and reveals himself to be...Tony "The Body."

TONY

That's right you fool. It was me, Popick! I had you and everybody fooled. I gave some homeless guy a can of Coke-Cola, and that was even to get him to dress as Santa. Paid off some hookers, got my freaks. Everybody thinks he did. That senile old bastard, Bill Watts fines you $50,000. Haha! I'm finished with you...no, no. I'm not done yet.

Tony drags BPP all the way to the top of the building where a plane is awaiting them. Both men goes inside the plane. The plane flies off but stops. Tony throws BPP out of the plan into a dumpster outside the arena. Tony climbs outside of the plane and delivers a big elbow drop. SWISH~!

The cameras show both men laying inside the dumpster with what appears to be a mattress which gave away. Tony climbs out.

TONY

Uh... That shows you to never question my heart. The heartbreaker, show-stealer, main eventing, 5 star carrying son of a bitch is back!

End of show.

[Chanel #99]

Credits to:SP, AP, Sandman, Naz, Tony and myself