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OAOAST TMW: A comedy/erotic e-fed

Raw Is Whore 5/24/2021


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THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PORN AND SPORTS AND ENTERTAINMENT PRESENTS RAW IS WHORE!

We cut to Sofa Central where Alix is seductively sucking on a Hottiemania 20 LOLLIPOP

loli888.gif

***Ansonia and Rizzette’s JOBS ON THE LINE: Our Truth Vs Cady of Grimm***

Casy entered to Vow by Garbage…

I can't use what I can't abuse
And I can't stop when it comes to you

 

 

via GIPHY

(pretend the sign says CADY instead of SID!!)

LILLIAN
The following contest is a two on one HANDICAP MATCH! Now making her way to the ring from White Deer, Texas, she is “THE SEMEN DEMON” CAAAAAAADYYY OF GRRRIIIMMMMMM!

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
I can understand Rizette and Ansonia wanting to keep their dream alive-

ALIX
They got bills!

LILLIAN
And already in the ring, fighting for their very livelihood….RIZETTE AND ANSONIA CUTTER….OUUUURRR TRUUUUTTTHHHH!

RENEE
But, to harass Krista and demand she rematch you against Cady of Grim? With your jobs hanging on the lines? Why am I entertaining this like Rizette and Ansonia deserve serious analysis?

ALIX
Wise Alix once  say: wrestling is taking chicken shit and giving it a five star review, six stars in Tokyo Dome.

RENEE
Speaking of chicken shit, there’s farms in Canada I can get Our Truth unpaid internships at.

ALIX
Free labor! Awesome! Just don’t take the black one or you’re gonna get into some weird slave territory thing.

DING DING DING


RIZZETTE
Anson, take her rear.

ANSONIA
You ain’t gotta tell me to take a bitch’s rear!

RIZETTE
Hhaha, good one, man…woman. 

Anson or Ansonia took Cady down with a Karate Kid worthy leg sweep. He didn’t count on Cady kipping up, which she did within three seconds of hitting the ground. To his/her credit Anson wailed away at Cady with clubbing lefts. Little good the attacks did! Cady folded Anson with a single lariat!

ALIX
It’s crazy this tranny stuff,  Renee, you think you can be talking to Aunt Joan but she’s really Uncle Jack.

RENEE
There had to be a more sensitive way for you to say that.

Rizette  continued to give marching orders, this time sending her partner for a monkey flip effort. Alas, Cady easily blocked the move with a simple flick of the wrist. Even easier: the sit-out spinebuster Cady then used to crush Ansonia’s vertebrae!

CADY
Creatures of the night! Speak to me!

“YYYYEEEEEAAAAA!”

ALIX
Cady’s sort of friendlier than her dad.

RENEE
You’re not saying much.One of Ruby’s curses is friendlier than Sadist.

Sweat pooling on his/her forehead, Anson tried to slow the situation with a side headlock. Instead, Cady threw him/her to the mat with a lightning-fast back suplex!

ALIX
Oh oh oh, one time Colombian Heat got super hammered and was all like “Sadist, if you’re so big, why don’t you fight me?!” And it took like 6 people to stop Sadist from drowning Heat in that Burger King toilet. I didn’t think that many people could fit in a toilet stall!

RENEE 
Stories like that are why we don’t have a “Ride Along” type show.

But, Ansonia served her purpose as a distraction; Rizette dispensed of Cady with a simple scoop slam. Keeping with the basic offense,  Rizette hit a running fist drop!

Into the cover…

ALIX
This is it, this is a career making moment!

A kickout before the one!

ALIX
Oopsies never mind.

Freak flags shone brightly as Our Truth teamed to douse the flaming hot Texan with a wave of forearms. But, Cady exploded like magma, sending RIZETTE tumbling to the mat with a leg trap spinebuster!
 
CADY
BURN IN THE FIRES OF PANDEMONIUM!

ALIX
Just don’t burn Jade’s bacon!

As Rizette endured a procession of stomps to the head, Ansonia knew Riz needed rescuing! Thus the deadbeat dad scurried to the top turnbuckle

A Deviant in NEW NEW MIDNIGHT EXPRESS shirt hollered, “THE BLACKER THE BERRY THE SWEETER THE JUICE!

RENEE
I feel sick.

This bit of sexual harassment halted a now disgusted, frowning Ansonia up top. This provided a blessing to the demonic Hottie. The Semen Demon snatched hold of unsuspecting Ansonia. The Scumbag hadn’t a chance to defend himself before Cady scrambled his brains with a brain buster onto the top turnbuckle!

ALIX
Holy guacamole!

“HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!” The fans sung, some already tweeting about the punishing move.

RENEE
That’s one of those holds that might get banned eventually. If not Ansonia now then one day Cady is going to break someone’s neck.

A cover….

ONE!


TWO!


THREE!!

NO! RIZETTE BROKE UP THE FALL!

RENEE
That was so close Melody was ready to move The Scumbags to the alumni section of TMW.com

Rizette unloaded 30 odd years of rotten luck, incompetent public defense attorneys, and predatory loans on Cady in the form of right jabs. But when he bounced off the ropes to barrel into a dizzy Cady, The Semen Demon knocked him/her out her/his TJ-MAXX bought pumps with a CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL!!

“YOU GOT FUCKED UP! YOU GOT FUCKED UP! YOU GOT FUCKED UP!

RENEE 
Sadist’s baby girl just sent Our Truth’s employment hopes to hell.

ALIX
Oooh man their creditors are gonna be hella P.O.ed!

Cover….


CROWD
ONE!


CROWD 
TWO!


CROWD 
THREE!

Winner: Cady of Grimm, via pinfall

RENEE
That’s all she wrote for the seven-year OAOAST career of Rizette and Ansonia. And oddly enough it’s sort of a fitting way to end.

ALIX
HEHEHEH they lost their job because they got beat up by The Semen Demon. Heheheh you hate to see it! Hehhe, now Ansonia’s kids know their dad got beat up by The Semen Demon. Hhehehe!

Post-match, Cady addressed the crowd…

CADY 
Creatures of the blackest night!

“YYYYYEEEAAAAA!”

CADY
No one can hope to defeat the evil eye or the all fucking vagina. The meat curtain has been lifted, creatures of the blackest night. Enjoy  the bloody spectacle!

RENEE
Cady takes everything her dad did and turns the volume to max.

RENEE
Welcome to The Toy Box where the Deviants are going wild for the whores of Raw Is Whore!

TONIGHT!
A SPECIAL SNEAK PREVIEW OF TONI PATRICA’S NEWEST PRODUCTION

ALIX
Oh boy! Oh boy! I can’t wait! Get my vibe ready, Izzy, big sis is gonna go wild!
 

LATER TONIGHT....JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN VS LADYBIRD JONES!!

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Backstage in one of the locker rooms we find 

Bebe-Rexha-Hot-Boobs-Photos-1.jpg
KATHY KAREN KELLY

Consoling a despairing…..


I've shown so much of myself to the world': The Witcher's Anya Chalotra on  power, people-watching and being a perfectionist | Television | The Guardian

DREAMY

While

hannah (she/her) on Twitter: "anywayssss https://t.co/ogQmaEUjtM pls avert  ur eyes if u know me irl sksjdjdn https://t.co/51fRTcidg4" / Twitter

ANGLESLUT makes puppy dog faces in sadness. Maybe faux sadness since she’s doing it into her phone.

KKK
You know the last time I fought Charli9ine she ran me down with a spear. But she totally cheated and this time is gonna be WAAAAAAY different.

DREAMY
Hold please, you’re taking her on? Are you bonkers?!

KKK
After what she did to you last Raw Is Whore, where she cheated, AGAAAAAAIN, I can’t let that stand, BFF. She’s going to get the uno, dos, tres! 

AS
Great idea! I hate cheaters, and I hate blonds, except you, Kathy. And Charli is a blond and a cheater!  So to heck with her! The Skylites and the AWO are all besties so why not tear that ugly, ratty, unwashed blond her out her head? Then you can stand over her brand new OVARY champion. That’s almost as great as being a gold medalist in equestrian dressage. A very far almost actually. But it still counts somehow!

KKK
So awessoooooommeee!


But before KKK can strap up for the fight, in walks…

kelly kelly | Page 4 of 11 | Sportzwiki

SKYLAR, checking her phone.

51 Hottest Liv Morgan Big Butt Pictures Which Are Incredibly Bewitching –  The Viraler
With BILLIE CHILD sucking on a Lollipop


SKYLAR
Ten thousand new Twitter followers. Hmmmmm  It should be eleven thousand. Anyway, what are you queens discussing?


BILLIE
You should post more about where to find good xannies….because I need some bad.

KKK
I’m so about to wreck Charli once and for all!

BILLIE
Man, I wanna snicker, but the downers are having their way with me.

SKYLAR
Is that so?

KKK
Oh yeah!

SKYLAR
I don’t think so.

BILLIE
That’s a good catch phrase. But Krista won’t let me do promos because she’s afraid I’ll fall asle…ZZZZZzzzzZZZZ

Everyone ignores Billie.

AS
Someone has to deal with Rat’s Nest. I can’t because I don’t fight jobbers.. But Kathy does!

SKYLAR
While I agree with you, queen, I think we’ll have Dasha handle it.

DREAMY
Dasha? Praying for her life in this cold world.

KKK
Dasha? Dasha absolutely sucks!

SKYLAR
We have to support Dasha as women and survivors.

KKK
Survivors?

SKYLAR
Surviors of the toxic haters running rampant and attacking our spiritual well being.

KKK
But Dasha has toooonnnnns in common with Charli. They both have stupid names, they both have an obvious inferiority complex when it comes to me. 

DREAMY
Deep, deep, within the deepest bowls of my body there is a begrudging respect in my body for Dasha….hahaha just kidding! Those two squaring off is practically a family reunion because they’re a family of total losers!

ANGLESLUT
You’re darn right she is. I’ve got more gold medals than anyone in this company. And what’s Dasha? A kid from a backward country that I don’t see why anyone cares about. Did Ukraine medal at my Olympics? I don’t think so! But, Russia did…but they’re also rotte cheaters…

SKYLAR
Dasha is bomb and Dasha is a queen. Putting her against Charli just feels right, queens. Let’s show her all the love and support we can.


Skylar nods with finality that shuts everyone else up. Except Billie who SNORES loudly.

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We return to the ring where we find THE BIGGUNS..

keisha grey didi MV5BNzc1NTU5MTYtODgwMy00OGYxLTg0MjMtZjI1Y2RkYjQ2NGFkXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNDUzOTQ5MjY@._V1_FMjpg_UX1000_.jpg
DIDI BIGGUNS

And

jj pipi.jpg
PIPI BIGGUNS (looking tough in backwards Anglemania X-8 baseball cap)

DIDI
Controversial statement: Chicks Over Blacks Dicks are as over The Bigguns. Controversial statement: Chicks Over Black Dicks deserved to beat The Bigguns at Taco Duelsday. 

RENEE
There’s nothing controversial about any of thoe statements.

DIDI
Controversial statement: Chicks Over Black Dicks has 1/999999th the legendary lactoids as Didi Bigguns! That statement is where I draw the line in the sand. Let me explain something to you, the reason our family took on the name Bigguns is because every female in the family produces top of the line milk making BIGGUNS!

ALIX
So dudes are walking around with the last name Bigguns because their grannies got big tits? Gay!

DIDI
Everything that goes on inside the Toy Box goes according to the rules laid out by The Big Shot, the Big Rack, Didi Bigguns. See, what I think is that these other girls wanna be Didi Bigguns. Especially when the other girls we’re talking about are Eponine and Isabelle.

ALIX
Izzy and I love to play pretend!

DIDI
 But they don’t got the spirit of Didi Bigguns in em and they don’t got Didi’s Bigguns on em.

ALIX
I got the joke! I got it! But, I’m gonna let Renee tell em what Didi meant so Renee can prove that she  knows.

RENEE
……

DIDI
Chicks Over Black Dicks, the only thing that’s over is your title run, and the only one who is over is me! I dragged Pipi along, I put a little courage in her and-

PIPI
Geisha Girls!

DIDI
Huh?!

PIPI
Geisha Girls, I’m calling you flat-chested cows out!

RENEE
Pipi Bigguns is demanding an appointment with Hina and Mitama.

ALIX
Wouldn’t cows, by nature of being cows, not be flat chested?

RENEE
Look at that UCLA education go!

PIPI
Geisha Girls, I’m already fixing to get angry. Don’t make me fit to be tied!

DIDI
What on God’s Green Earth are you yapping about?

PIPI
The Geishas slithered, because they’re slimy like snakes and they ain’t got Bigguns like snakes, the snakes slithered into BLK’s life last Raw Is Whore.

RENEE
I remember that. Turns out some of the BLK guys ordered the Geishas from Christopher Patrick Allen.

ALIX
Don’t worry, Renee, it’ll be your turn soon.

PIPI
And then on TMW I get taken advantage of by Bedrock because The Geishas cast some sort of mystical spell on my Luther. And that’s why my black knight didn’t put on his shinning armor and resuce me.

DIDI
Yer Luther? Like Luther Mandela from BLK?

PIPI
How much you gotta hear the same ol thing.I keep telling you he’s my boyfriend! And, ya’ll need to know something! Ain't nothing happening on this show until Didi and me do right by Luther’s honor, my honor and my G-Cups and tear them Geisha Girls some new ones!

BAM!

RENEE
Didi sucker punched her own cousin!

Didi hoisted whimpering Pipi onto her shoulders, spun to each section of the Toy Box, and then….

RENEE
Didi looking for that Alabama Slam!

BUT, PIPI ESCAPED down the back!

RENEE
The fighting Bigguns cousins are back at it! 

Pipi subdue Didi with a dreaded NIPPLE TWISTER! The pain of the move laid the elder Bigguns out. With Didi suffering, Pipi ascended to the top rope with a huge leap.

That’s where Pipi’s impressiveness ended. .

PIPI
It’s kinda scary up here.

Luckily, Pipi was able to get down before the height could claim her life. Unluckily, Didi’s PRESS SLAM brought Bigger, Bustier and Badder crashing to the canvas!  

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHH!”

Shaking her head in disgust, Didi hoisted Pipi up yet again! But, this time Didi got off the Albama Slam with a shout they heard in Mobile! 

Post finisher, Didi ascended to the top turnbuckle with a question for the Deviants…

DIDI
How do you like my Bigguns now?!

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***Jade Vs Ladybird Jones***

We see Lillian Garcia standing in the ring, looking MILFY, in a strapless sequined red dress.

LILLIAN
Deviants, please welcome Reject to RAW IS WHORE!

None other than the multi time OAOAST world champ, and TMW analyst, Reject sits in the front row. He wears a blue button up shirt and faded jeans.

RENEE
Hi Reject!!!

Reject ignores Renee.

ALIX
:haha2:

LILLIAN
The following match is scheduled for one fall, and will be refereed by Konan!

Konan has DA STICK~!

KONAN
Yo yo, lemme speak on this! Viva La RIW!

“VIVA RIDUB! VIVA RIDUB! VIVA RIDUB!”

KONAN
We bout to get bouty bouty and rowdy rowdy!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

LILLIAN
Introducing first, from right here in A by way of Grand Rapids, Michigan, she is “THE BOOTY SOLDIER” JADE RODEZ DUNNNCAAANN!

Jade entered to Twerkulator by City Girls…

It's time for the twerkulator
It's time for the twerkulator
I'ma shake what my mama gave me
I'ma shake my money-maker

It's time for the twerkulator
It's time for the twerkulator
It's time for the twerkulator
It's time for the twerkulator (ayy)

 

via GIPHY

 

ALIX
I’ll tell you what Jade has one hell of a challenge at Hottiemania 20!

RENEE
Exactly. She will goe belly to abs with LeBrenda James, one on one, for the first time ever.

ALIX
I’ve seen Jade do it all. I watched her beat every single Nerdly sister in the ring except Madison. And Melody was in OAOAST 2k11 and she lost 50 matches before that and Krista says Melody let Jade win, but it still counts!

RENEE
Uh what’s your point?

ALIX
My point? Uh, I don’t have one. Duh!

Ladybird got the jobber entrance, but don’t worry we have a skit!

“EARLIER TODAAAAAAAY!!!"

We see our General Manager, KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN in front of her office, offering instruction to a pair of Fluffers. One Fluffer has short red hair the other is at least 6’3.

KRISTA
You don’t have to make him cum twice, but if you make him hard again after he jizzes you can sleep well. 

The Fluffers nod. Tall girl takes notes.

KRISTA
Paths intersect. The path of handjobs, the path of blow jobs all intersect.

More nods. More note taking.

KRISTA 
If you work hard you can make him cum. But if you do not lick the balls you have no future and are doomed to a life of going out with other lonely women you call girlfriends and eventually killing three people in a DUI accident after you’ve had a wine cooler. Class dismissed.

Krista strides away, sure she’ll be nominated for teacher of the year.

BUT Ladybird Jones has other ideas. LeBrenda’s BFF came in on her own with PAMPHLETS she passed to the Fluffesrs.

LADYBIRD
If you want to learn something read this instructional pamphlet I wrote, “Good Wrestling For The Modern Age.” This, Fluffers, is how you wrestle. And make sure to pay close attention to my match with Jade. You’ll see for sure that I am that MF!

FLUFFER WITH SHORT RED HAIR
You’ve got attitude! You’re that mother fucker!

LADYBIRD
You have it all wrong, Fluffer with red hair. I’m thst MEDIUM FUNDAMENTAL. Get ready to attend my wrestling clinic. I’m going to make Jade my first patient.

But THE GEISHA GIRLS….

Update] Choa says she's leaving AOA for mental health reasons, FNCE says  not finalized – Asian Junkie
MITAMA

And

a0e00-park-shin-hye28929.jpg

HINA

Giggled in the background 

MITAMA
Sister, sister, another soul tries desperately to save her job.

HINA
Mitama, Mitama, hopefully she will join shrewish Doll in being wished well in her future endeavors.

MITAMA
Sister, sister, please do not mention The Doll, the very thought of her horrifies me.

BACK TO SOFA CENTRAL

ALIX
Ha! Jade won’t even get a physical because she doesn’t wanna know her blood pressure. Like really? There’s no clinic Jade is showing up to! Ha!

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Ladybird jumped on Jade as Sowee made her entrance into the squared circle. Clubbing forearms wore down Jade, giving rise to Ladybird to proclaim-

LADYBIRD
Substance triumphs over flash.

ALIX
Cope, cope, cope.

Jade struggled upright only to see Ladybird toss her to the mat with a hip toss. The Harvard grad stayed on Jade and swiftly tangled her into a surf board style submission!

ALIX
If ya look closely you can see down Jade’s top!

Jade hollered in agony but refused Referee Konan queries towards submission.

LADYBIRD
Very few people besides myself would think to apply a submission within the first 15 seconds of the match. But very few people lack my intellect.

ALIX
I know the feeling!

Jade might not be the brightest, but she was the toughest! She used that strength and grit to fight free of Ladybird’s hold to the fans joy. The Deviants rooted the big girl on as her recovery saw her pitch Ladybird into the ropes. Jade lowered her head for Ladybird’s rebound, expecting a leapfrog. What she got? A kick to the chest!

LADYBIRD
Fundamental: Never take your eye off your opponent. 

Jade threw a right hand that Ladybird swiftly sidestepped. Showcasing great agility, The Medium Fundamental seized old of Sowee in an armlock. Again Jade wailed in pain now forced to suffer through the pressure on her elbow and shoulder. 

“BORING! BORING! BORING!” the audience heckled Ladybird.

LADYBIRD
You need to be conditioned to appreciate me. 

Jade tried to fight her way to freedom, but LadtB knew exactly what to do; the Harvard grade twisted in front of Jade and hit a jawbreaker!

“OOOOOOOOOH!”

RENEE
That’s LeBrenda’s Hoop Dreams!

Cover…


ONE!

A kickout!


RENEE
After all that work by Ladybird, Jade still has tons of energy left.

ALIX
That’s really really odd cuz high cholesterol lowers your energy level.

With Jade still grounded, Ladybird fastened her into a chin lock. The simple move locked Jade’s breath, ragged gasps coming from her mouth.

LADYBIRD
Friends. the chinlock gets a bad rap, but after the Hoop Dreams chin crusher it is an effective hold sure allow me to stand in the winner’s circle.

Uh no: Jade powered her way upright, much to Ladybird’s surprise! The Medium Fundamental can’t help but scream in misery and shock as Jade sent her flying with a hip toss. Shock or not, Ladybird clambered upright. Alas that carried her into the path of Jade’s E!ziguri!

“YYYYYEEEEEEAAAAA!”

JADE
See these?
KYLIE PAGE MASSAGE BOOBS.gif
These are giant melons! They’re part of a balanced diet! Eat up Ladybird!

Splash onto Ladybird’s face!

via GIPHY

 

RENEE
I just have the hardest time believing Jade knows a thing about a balanced diet

ALIX My computer is going everythi
Hater! She so does! She has bacon and grits for breakfast, a bacon and lettuce sandwich for lunch, and a bacon cheeseburger for dindin.

RENEE
Good grief.

Jade abused Ladybird like she was Trevor Bauer, eventually dumping LadyB into the corner.

JADE
Melons taste great and fundamentalss tell us everyone should have fruit in their mouth!

Jade readied for a BIG SPLASH, but K-Dawg had other ideas..

SHOCKED KYLIE PAGE33.gif

KONAN
Yo, yo, yo let me freak on these!

“VIVA LA WHITE GIRL! VIVA LA WHITE GIRL! VIVA LA WHITE GIRL!”

Admist all this fuckery, Ladybird ascended to the top turnbuckle. No exposition needed from the biracial Hottie: she sailed at Jade with a cross body and bowled her over! No easy feat!

Into a lateral press…


ONE!

No! Jade reversed it!

ONE!


TWO!


Ladybird with the kickout! 

The Medium Fundamental rolled upright and then launched a pair of kicks to Jade’s thiiiiick thighs. But the white trash slut shrugged them off, shocking Ladybird. The wide eyed brainiac got those big brains rattled as Jade belted her with a left! Then a right! And then Swoeee laid her out with a clothesline!

RENEE
Two Piece and a Biscut combo!

“OINK! OINK! OINK”

JADE
Let’s get that bacon sizzling! Bootytime!

“YYYYYYEAAAAAAAA!”

We got the rump jiggling…

 

 

Reject looked on approvingly!

And then into the moonsault….NO! Ladybird brought up the knees! Jade reeled backwards, her soft stomach ailing. 

ALIX
Krista says “Just five crunches, five is all I’m telling you to do.” But Jade won’t do it, and by gawd, she paid the price.

Ladybird pointed at Reject, who nodded in appreciation. Why not as Ladybird went to the Eulogy in tribute! But Jade pushed Ladybird off midflight, landing her foe into the corner. Though in pain, Ladybird charged back with a somewhat slow-moving lariat. The slow defeated the slower as Jade dipped behind Ladybird’s questing arm.

RENEE
Ladybird is  left wide open!

ALIX
And it ain’t the first time, by gawd
.

Renee had it right; Jade brought Ladybird crashing to the mat with a reverse x-factor!!!!!!

RENEE
Jade Got It From Her Mama!!!!!

Konan counted the fall!


CROWD
ONE!

 

CROWD
TWO!

 

 

CROWD
THREE!!!!


“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Winner: Jade Rodez Duncan, via pinfall

RENEE
Ladybird got into Jade’s face, brought the fundamentals, but Jade brought-

ALIX
Da Sizzle!

RENEE
And will that sizzle be enough to beat LeBrenda James at Hottiemania 20 live from Madison Square Garden?

Post-match, The Booty Soldier addressed her troops.

JADE
Medium Fundamental, great match! Now, I’m a lady with a ton of nicknames, and I’d like to add a new one. 

ALIX
Mrs.Genevieve has a TON of nicknames for Jade.

RENEE
I think we won’t explore that family dynamic right now.

Jade exited the ring and approached Reject. The multi-time OAOAST World Champion leaned back in his chair with a slick smile.

JADE
I think I’ll call myself…

Jade slowly slipped her skirt down, giving the Deviants the tease they deserved. The smile never left Reject’s face. Nor did the smiles leave any Deviants’ face!

JADE
The Juicy Fundamental! 

“YOU’RE A WHORE! YOU’RE A WHORE! YOU’RE A WHORE!”

Reject’s reaction is immediate, his cock is out and ready for Sowee. The fans rose  to their feet as Jade sunk low, her juicy fundamental arrested by Reject’s dick.

JADE
Ohhhhhh yesssss!

Jade rode Reject as only a seasoned whore could, as only a Duncan could!

jade cowgirl3.gif

JADE
Juicy, juicy, baby!

ALIX
Dig diggity dog, I love my job!

The purring piggy was happier than a boar in mud! Her mewing soon turned to oinking such was the incredible pleasure given to her!

jade cowgirl2.gif

Jade got Reject in so deep his big heavy sack rested against her entrance. Full of sperm, these meaty nuts already pumped jizzum into her greedy fuck hole.

JADE
OINK! OINK! OINK!

Deviants across the globe stroked their love muscles to this fantastic scene. Even I have to pause to attend to my member. You know how I love white bitches!

via RedGIFs

 

JADE
Oinkity Oink OIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINKKKITY!

More cum pumped into Jade’s slut hole, not an uncommon sight, but still a smoking hot one. The fat bitch rode Reject so hard you’d think she went from an XXL to an XL!

“WE LOVE WHORES! WE LOVE WHORES! WE LOVE WHORES!”

A tiny pale Fluffer with long black curls down to her waist hurried to Jade’s side!

FLUFFER
Jade, Jade, come quick, Maya is being attacked by Etta Kitt!

Sowee loves big dicks but she loved her sister even more! Jade hopped off Reject’s dick just as fast as she hopped on. 

ALIX
Waddle, Jade, waddle!

Jade did more than waddle! She ran backstage in hopes of saving her sister from a devastating beating.

RENEE
I hope Etta doesn’t have that paddle.

ALIX
I hope she does!

RENEE
What kind of step mom are you?

The Fluffer lead Jade past the guerilla position…into a SLAM DUNK TOMAHAWK CHOP from LEBRENDA JAMES!!

RENEE
It was a trap!

ALIX
Not the tranny kind of trap, the even worse kind!

Jade writhed in pain, her head wracked with the ringing of the brutal assault.

LEBRENDA
This ain’t a buffet, bitch! It’s a slaughterhouse, ho and I’m the cutting board! You can’t see me, fat girl, I’m a legend! You should pay me to feud with you. Don’t worry though at Hottiemania 20 I’ll come and collect.

FLUFFER WITH LONG BLACK HAIR
Ms.James. What about the five hundred you promised me?

LEBRENDA
You want your five piece?

SLAM DUNK to the FLUFFER!!!!

LEBRENDA
There you go, trick, five fingers to the dome. Thank me for that rub.

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We’re taken to the medical area of the Toy Box. No it’s not an STD testing place! What we have is a state of the art room with many physical therapy features. We have TRX bands, elipitcal machines, massage tables….and DOCTOR MAX ANDERSON and DOCTOR STEPHEN PIGLEY aka THE LOVE DOCTORS

DOCTOR ANDERSON
Easy, Pierette, easy you don’t have to push yourself.

Standing next to Doctor Anderson is…

km3333katherine-mcnamara-smile-2018.jpg
ADELPHE SAINT NERDREGARD

ADELPHE
Though it is in our Nerdly blood to push ourselves to the great limits of the Galaxy, Doctor Anderson is right.

What is Pierette pushing?

Why, she’s pushing DOCTOR STEPHEN PIGLEY’s dick up her redhead snatch!

image.gif

PIERETTE 
I gotta be me, kid, I gotta be, Pierette!

PIGLEY
Not so fast, it’s about the motion in the ocean. Nurse how she’s looking?

A busty dark skinned nurse looks at Pierette’s leg.

NURSE
No redness, no swelling.

Oh there’s swelling alright! In the Deviants’ pants!

PIERETTE 
Then I can max it out!

Pierette goes harder on Doctor Pigley’s dick!

image.gif
What a coincidence as I’m going harder on my dick! But cock blocking the situation are members of the AWO…

image.jpeg
ANGLESLUT

&

image.jpeg
TABITHA

ANGLESLUT
If this isn’t the average fucking the average! What did you think of that joke, Tabby?

TABITHA 
Did you say something? This mirror caught my attention.

ADELPHE 
You are very unwelcome, Angie.

ANGLESLUT
Excuse me? I’m an Olympic gold medalist! I have an NFT of me riding a horse. And it’ll sell one of these days! And who are you? Second rate, knock off Nerdly cousins? What’s next, Tabby, a super villain named Buff Globe? Get it, Tab?

TABITHA
This mirror is awfully small. I can barely see the strands of my naturally blond hair.

Though pained, Pierette rose and limped to face Angie aka Angleslut.

PIERETTE
You’re wearing white! Good, the bloodstains will look awesome!

ANGESLUT 
Hey! The day you put your hands on me and the day I lose to any discount Nerdly is the day heck freezes over! Tell em, Tbaby.

TABITHA
Excuse me, girl admiring herself. Please keep your voices low.

Adelphe clenches her dainty fists, making them look not so dainty

ADELPHE
Angie, you must have been born under an unlucky star. My Celestial Cum Craver heart beats hard, I stand amongst the golden waves of glory. And these waves will sweep over you at Hottiemania 20 and carry the AWO and your gold medals away.

ANGLESLUT
Interesting, very interesting. I’m gonna be like my bestie, Maya, and offer you this rebuttal.

SHOVE, Angleslut pushes PIERETTE into the ginger’s baby sister. Both girls go tumbling to the ground, landing in a heap of red hair, wet pussied and scowls!

DOCTOR ANDERSON
Adelphe, Tabitha, you need to leave.

TABITHA
It would be an honor.

popcorn soul

ANGLESLUT
You better remember, bucko, that I am the sluttiest there is, there sluttiest there was and the sluttiest there ever will be, and I’m the bottom bitch because Angleslut said so, if you taste what the slut is cumming!

We end the segment on an electric staredown between Adelphe and Angleslut. Never have we seen such fierce, stoney intensity from the usually kind and ethereal Adelphe.

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Look who it is…

ko18636.jpg
KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN, legend, general manager, multi millionaire and queen of all porn. Our beloved fap fodder sits behind her desk all smiles. She doesn’t notice there’s jizz in her hair!


KRISTA
Boys, have you ever wonder what daddy’s little girl gets up to when she’s over papa’s house? Wonder no more as Toni Patrica and I present Daddy’s Little Girl, exclusively available on the OAOAST network and starring my little girl, Maya and her big strapping dad, Ned Blanchard. Yes, Ned may be a low life piece of shit worthy only of dying alone on a traffic median. Bit before Jewish Jesus can kill him off let’s see him make mama’s girl squeal! Check it out…

TONI PATRICA AND KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN PRESENT…

DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL…


KRISTA
My filthy fucking daughter sure knows how to sin. Just like I fucked my dad, my girl is gonna fuck her dad. Good girls give daddy the relief he needs, choking down every last inch of his cock and milking those balls for every last drop!

 

via RedGIFs

 

KRISTA
First and foremorst, my daughters are my playthings. Bu, well sometimes mommy is being a stick in the mud and isn’t in the mood. So daddy comes rolling up in his corvette that he’s late on his payments on and is going to get repossed any minute now, and daddy’s lil girl hops in for a fast and bumpy ride.

sophie dee fuck2.gif

KRISTA
Even if daddy’s little girl gets a boyfriend that poor sap is just being cuckolded by the real man in her life!

via RedGIFs

 

KRISTA
Some people say we’re sick to fuck our dad’s. But isn’t it a little girl’s responsibility to make her dad happy?

sophie dee bj.gif

KRISTA
And we DO NOT use condoms! So what if our daddy’s cum inside us? That’s what abortions are for! tee-heh!

 

via RedGIFs

 

KRISTA
Some people ask what kind of mother am I to allow my daughter to be fucked by her father.

 

via RedGIFs

 

KRISTA
I’m the kind of mother that fucks her own father! He took my virginity so I’ll keep taking his cocks! Ned was a little late to get on the incest train. But now he’s full speed ahead into Maya tight twenty year old twat. And according the producer we have to hear from him, which is just a terrible, terriblbe thing. He’d be perfect if he was mute, And perhaps incapable of learning any way to communicate. Oh, how lovely that would be! 

We find…

NED BLANCHARD, leaning back on one of his many sports cars, this time a Phantom. Little Maya stretches out across the hood in a bikini.

NED
Maya came to me and said she and Krista were making another one of those pornos with Toni. I said “nuh-uh” you ain’t making nothing without ol Ned Blanchard!

MAYA
You’re so strong, daddy! Please fuck me everyday ❤️

NED
This dick created this bitch, and this dick is gonna go to god damn town all day and all night on this bitch.

MAYA
Yes, please, daddy!

NED
You wanna call Ned Blanchard a deadbeat dad? I didn’t pay child support? You ain’t gotta worry about my money, son because I’ll be pounding my kid like she owes me money!

CAMERAMAN
Don’t you owe money on all these cars?

KICK.WHAM.STUNNER.

The camera cuts to Maya quite pleased with herself, even though she has a strand of Ned’s cum hanging off one of her eyelashes.

MAYA
Some of my friends ask me “how can you fuck your own father?” Like, how can I not? Have you seen my daddy? Uh, like, he is so friggin hot! I mean, yeah, there are plenty of hot guys out there. Plenty of fish in the uhhh thingie with water, but ain’t no Flounders got the big dick my daddy’s got! And I’d be a super shitty daughter if I ddn’t suck his cock when he was kind of enough to grope my tits suddenly.

We cut back to Krista who know stands in front of a display of DVDs and Blu Rays featuring her spreading her perfect Cali pind.

KRISTA
But wait, Toni Patrica also presents “Shut Up And Take Cock!” starring my daddy, and me! In this thrilling tale based on my life story, a crooked politician pimps his daughter to advance his career.

amber m fuck.gif

KRISTA
Am I doing it right, daddy?

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
Doing great, sweetheart, I mean that!

We cut back to Krista, who apparently has forced the Fluffers to TAKE CALLS for people wanting to buy  the movie.

KRISTA
Watch my dad make me  fuck anything that moves in new and demeaning ways for your viewing pleasure.

 

via RedGIFs

 

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
God damn it, Steve don’t fuck her so hard, I gotta get her to the Vietcong in half and hour and those guys like a woman who takes charge!

Cut back to Krista, who’s a little too hands on with a pigtailed Fluffer.

KRISTA
Listen to my own father reduce me to a cheap whore.

 

via RedGIFs

 

CONGRESSMAN
Bob, if you get her pregnant that’s on you. I want nothing to do with that baby

Back to Krista who is motioning for the cameraman to zoom in on the Fluffer with the biggest tits

KRISTA
He made me give up my asshole to a lawn care guy so he wouldn’t have to pay that month’s bill!

 

via RedGIFs

 

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
No gapes! I don’t want to see my little girl gaped.

KRISTA
Thanks dad!

Krista is taking orders herself! And fucking it up and crashing WINDOWS 98 computer system

KRISTA
While most of daddy’s snobby friends were racist, daddy was pimping his little girl to UCLA basketball recruits.

 

via RedGIFs

 


KRISTA
Daddy knew when I was born I’d be a  stupid blond with only one aspiration in life: to achieve the title of filthy whore. And he really helped me out by letting all those black basketball players from the ghetto fuck my brains out!

private-fantasy-of-samantha-saint-prince-yahshua.gif

We cut to Congressman JD, sitting in a makeshift Oval office.

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
Did I pimp my daughter? Yeah, I pimped my daughter. So what? Did I fuck her? Yeah, I fucked her. Who wouldn’t? Even when she was a teenager she had big tits and a tight ass. You had to pay 700 dollars to the escort service for an underage girl who looked like her back in the day. I ain’t paying that. So I just fucked Krista. Saved myself a lot dinero! They say you gotta spend money to make money. Ha! See this shirt? I stole it from Tony Tourette’s when he passed out after jerking off to a marathon of that Jessica Ferguson chick getting raped.

PRODUCER
Do you love your daughter?

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
Of course I love her. But lemme tell you, that girl is as dumb as a box of rocks! It ain’t like me molesting her and pimping her robbed the world of Marie Curie. She’s a real dumb piece of work.

PRODUCER
What about Amberlyn?

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
I keep telling her men would rather have sex with a 6 that’ll really slam ass with them then a 10 that just lies there.

PRODUCER
And what about Pierce?

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
Who?

PRODUCER
Your son.

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
What about him?

PRODUCER
Have you had sex with your granddaughters?

CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN
What do I look like? A faggot? Of course I nailed those whores! No condom, filled em right up. Most women belong in the kitchen but Jade and Maya are dunmb enough to blow the house up so they belong bouncing those big butts on my weiner! Hhahahah! But that ain’t in the movie, but you buy enough copies of the movie video tape the two kids going down on me!

DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL & SHUT UP AND TAKE COCK

BUY THEM TODAY ON DVD, BLU RAY AND ON DEMAND AT OAOASTSHOP.COM!!!!!!!!!!

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Backstage, Terry Taylor hyped an upcoming multi-team gauntlet match to determine the next challengers for the Hotties tag team championship; the winners to face either current titleholders Chicks Over Black Dicks or Woke Queens once their makeup bout is signed (see Taco Duelsday as to why). Woke Queens then spoke about the old fashioned whipping they received previously on Raw is Whore courtesy of the Skylites, which Terry noted viewing multiple times!

TORI
👁

HOW2GIRL
Highly unlikely anywhere near the number we’ve relived the incident in our minds, fellow concerned citizen! But sleep well with the thought this injustice will not go unpunished!

TORI
We’d also like to thank everyone for their well-wishes, likes and subscribes. And a special XOXO to our Hotties tag champions, Isabella Spezia and Eponine Black, for agreeing to honor the title shot the Skylites robbed us from anytime, any place.

The fighting BIGGUNS cousins took exception to Tori’s remarks, with Didi claiming the only victims of robbery were them and it was because of people like Woke Queens taking their valuable TV time and title shots!

PIPI (still selling effects from earlier in show)
Yeah!

DIDI
Shut up!

PIPI
Ooh! Do you start with me again, cousin.

DIDI
I won’t because I’m here to end this pity party.

PIPI
Yeah! End it!

TORI
Um, no. Only pity party I see being thrown is by you two.

PIPI
Hey, who’s the one crying over spilled milk?

HOW2GIRL
I see no milk spilled. *looks around*

TORI
I think our pint-sized friend is doing some projecting. After all, her “man” is going around spelling his chocolate milk over everyone but her!

Pipi balls up her fist ready to throw down but is restrained by Didi, who decided to throw down something of her own: a challenge. Which is for Woke Queens to press up against the glass, risking their makeup match with the champs to enter the aforementioned tag gauntlet.

“Of course they accept,” said a voice off-camera with an annoyingly familiar Jersey accent, to Woke Queens’ surprise.

The Bigguns suddenly had better things to do when EUPHORIA entered the scene, baseball bat in hand.

EUPHORIA 
Gee, why does it seem like people always leave when I show up to the party?

EUPHORIA 
Listen, E, we really appreciate you having our backs and all, but uh... maybe give us a little heads up before making career decisions on our behalf?

HOW2GIRL
You must work are your tardiness, young lady. Need I remind you what the Skylites did to me before you finally intervened?

EUPHORIA 
Yeeeeeah. About that... Sorry? *grins*

TORI
I think we better have a talk. All of us. Privately.

TERRY
No problem!

TORI
Girls’ only.

EUPHORIA 
😛

Terry hung his head as the girls left.

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***OVARY TITLE: DASHA Vs CHARLI 9INE(c)***

Dasha entered to “JUMP” by Kriss Kross, which I forgot was her entrance music until just now…

You should know, you should know that, ahh
Kris Kross is not having anything today
As we stand there totally crossed out
We commence to make ya (Jump jump)
The Mac Dad'll make ya (Jump jump)
The Daddy Mac'll make ya (Jump jump)
Kris Kross'll make ya (Jump jump)

via GIPHY

 

 

RENEE
I heard Skylar’s encouraging words. But, I don’t believe them. Everything Skylar has done to Dasha has been with pure malice and contempt. I feel bad for Dasha.

ALIX
I sure as hell dizznot. Dasha is in the best crew since Sports Entertainment Xtreme. I had an offer to join SeX but Terry Taylor convinced me to sign with the OAOAST.

RENEE
Good for you. Bad for Terry.

Charli entered to End Game by Taylor Swift…

I wanna be your endgame
I wanna be your first string
I wanna be your A-Team (whoa, whoa, whoa)
I wanna be your endgame, endgame


Big reputation, big reputation
Ooh, you and me, we got big reputations, ah
And you heard about me, ooh
I got some big enemies (yah)
Big reputation, big reputation
Ooh, you and me would be a big conversation, ah (git git)
And I heard about you, ooh (yah)
You like the bad ones too

 

RENEE
Here’s an interesting fact: Charli’s last three matches have totaled 3 minutes and 21 seconds. Combined.

ALIX
Here’s an interesting fact: Leon Rodez cums in twenty to thirty six seconds.

RENEE
Thank you for sharing.

DING DING DING

CHARLI
I don’t want to have to hurt to you…but…

SPEAR BY CHARLI!

“OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

Into a fireman’s carry!

RENEE
I’ve never seen that before!

And finally Charli threw out Dasha for the cutter!

RENEE
Cuffing Season!


The cover…

CROWD
ONE!


CROWD
TWO!!!

CROWD
THREE!!!


NO! DASHA KICKSOUT!

RENEE
WHAT?!

“HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!”

CHARLI
Now I’m mad.

Charli waited and waited for Dasha to rise. With an unsteady gait and blurred vision, the Ukrainian heroine came upright. But that brought her to Charli’s path; the OVARY champ mowed Dasha down with another SPEAR!!!

“OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!”

Charli rolled Dasha through into a second fireman’s carry, and followed through with a punishing CUFFING SEASON!

“OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

The cover…

CROWD
ONE!

CROWD
TWO!!


CROWD
THREEE!

Winner: Charli 9ine, via pinfall

RENEE
Absolute dominance by Charli 9ine.

ALIX
We don’t get paid by the hour here, folks. And if Krista had her way we wouldn’ get paid at all! 

Dasha writhed in pain on the mat, suffering enough that DOCTOR MAX ANDERSON came to take a look. The Ukranian, fighting like her countrymen, assured she was alright. This was patently false. Her woe was bad enough for Charli to check upon her.

But Charli had other problems!

RENEE
Charli, Charli, turn around!

When Charli turned around what awaited her was 23 years of hot fire: a School’s Out courtesy of one JENNA MALIBU!!!

ALIX
Damn her, damn her to hell! And damn Renee’s crappy advice!

RENEE
Like Jenna wouldn’t have attacked Charli if I hadn’t said turn around.

We had more going on than announcer bickering: namely Jenna tossed Charli shoulder first into the ringposts. That is every ringposts.

RENEE
The damage done to Charli’s shoulder…

Charli howled in pain. But her misery wasn’t enough for The Prodigy. Oh no. Jenna went up, concerning the Deviants. And why not as the indomintable Charli couldn’t rise. That led to Jenna dropping the bomb upon her with a 630 splash!

“OOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!”

RENEE
We’ve never seen that in Raw Is Whore!

ALIX
And we never seen it out her dad’s skinny fat ass.

But someone wouldn’t stand for this.

And that someone was DASHA!

A RIGHT FROM DASHA!


A LEFT FROM DASHA!


ANOTHER RIGHT!


ANOTHER LEFT!!


POP DROP BY JENNA! POP DROP BY JENNA!

“BBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

ALIX
Damn it! You bastard! I don’t think Candie and Zack were married when Jenna was conceived so yes I think she is a bastard!

Jenna strapped the OVARY strap around her waist and decided she looked pretty good…

via GIPHY


RENEE
We’ve seen total destruction from Jenna Malibu. Are we seeing the next OVARY champion?

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We’re taken to a Toy Box decorated in the principles of Feng Shui.  All furniture pieces are arranged so life and water can flow delicately and serenely.

And I’ve got something flowing to me thanks to….

sexy_stacy_keibler____by_camuskilller1904_dbpiqa9-fullview.jpg
ANNAGRET WICKEDBORN.

ANNAGRET
Hello, dorks, this Annagret Wickedborn, and this show isn’t so bad as long as I’m around. Gawds, you are so lucky. Hide your stash of dirty magazines you f’n luddiettes and  get your Annagret Wickedborn Fantasy Babe pocket pussy ready. Because I am coming for the crown. I am about to take all 14 inches of Tyrique Da Freak.

Speaking of the camera pans to….

World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) superstar Ezekiel Jackson comes to  Guyana - Stabroek News

DA FREAK, who has babyoil at the ready.

ANNAGRET
Da Freak is about to make it rain on my juicy white ass.

Annagret stretches out on the bed, showcasing that perfect frame. Crafted, tone, and chiseled, Annagret’s body is the perfect example of white beauty.

ANNAGRET
I can’t wait to feel what that big nigger dick does to my hot white asshole/

Da Freak hoved above Annagret, taking in a moment to admire Asgard’s gift to black men.  His meaty schlong hovers above her anus. This mastodon equals three white dicks and a purring Annagret knows it.

Alas she fails to hear the giggles behind her.

The giggles belonging to one….

Olivia Dunne (@livvydunne) / Twitter
ZELDA BAZIL


ZELDA
It’s magic.

POOOF!

ANNAGRET
Ohhh, daddy, that thing is one ebony lizard.

Uhhhh….

via GIPHY

 

ZELDA
Uh oh.

ANNAGRET
In fact it’s kinda scaly and slimy feeling.

ZELDA
Oh crap.

Annagret slowly titls her head, her eyes soon taking in what used to be Da Freak.

ANNAGRET
A lizard! OH-EM-GEE! DUB-TEE-EFF!!!!!!


ZELDA
It’s magic.

Annagret is upon Zelda like Jade on a bacon cheeseburger. Except the malice flickering in Annaget’s eyes says she’s going to devour Zelda!

ZELDA
Uh oh.

ANNAGRET
You need to die already!

ZELDA
Poof. Zelda begone.

Alas that spell doesn’t work.

ANNAGRET
I’ve had enough! Hottiemania 20, I’m gonna wipe that dopey look off your pig barf face and make you say goodnight.

ZELDA
I don’t want a match.

ANNAGRET
Are you daft? Who said anything about a match, pig barf?

That’s that for a fuming Annaget, who can scarcely control her violent urges.

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We’re taken way backstage for a closeup of America’s Self Proclaimed Sweetheart…

Suite Life's' Debby Ryan Gets Her Own Disney Channel Series – The Hollywood  Reporter

ANNIE IDOL

Across from her…

cc2ea55e2c5a9e106972fd605c633cb69de2b81a

ATUNA PAIN, sits on a dirextor’s chair.

ANNIE
Wow! Exciting! Fresh! NEW! Big scoops going down in the town! We are in deep in the studios here at the Toy Box. Look around!

The camera pans to reveal an empty studio minus the tech workers needed to produce the segment.

ANNIE
We need a big space to contain a big woman. Meet, Atuna Pain, the newest signee to Raw Is Whore. Atuna Pain, inquiring minds, want to hear you in your own  words.

Atuna shifts into a leaned forward tough girl posture.

ATUNA
So what?

ANNIE
The inquiring minds want to get to know you.

ATUNA
I don’t want to know them. Back home in Union Town, inquring minds get shot. You askyou die.  I’m from the toughest place in America. We don’t have inquiring minds. We got corpses, we got bodybag, but we ain’t got inquring minds,

ANNIE
UH…um…uh…don’t ya gotta ask if someone has a boyfriend or gal if you’re interested in them?

ATUNA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH! I take WHO I want. Your relationship ain’t my problem, and it ain’t yours. I’m your problem. And I’m a problem with a dirty mind and a mean left hand. That’s it. That’s my line.

ANNIE
But, I have more questions.

ATUNA
Do you want me to be your problem?

ANNIE
No! No way! Please....

ATUNA
Then that’s my line.
 

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Obey
We hope you have a lovely day
Obey
You don't want us to come out and play
Away, now now
There's nothing to see here
It's under control
We're only gambling with your soul
Obey
Whatever you do, just don't wake up and smell the corruption

“Obey” hit to summon Etta Kitt and a wave of heel heat. The furor was so great that it rivalved Anglesault in his prime. Or Black T! Or The Hello World catchphrase!

RENEE
In my opinion Etta is a monster.

ALIX
Translation Ethopian: click, click, click. Translation Alix: Etta is a biotch!

Etta stepped into the ring, further earning the derison of the rabid Deviants. Some already began throwing trash into the ring.

ETTA
If only I was back in school. I’d have you…

RENEE
But she’s not. She’s with The Deviants!

ETTTA
As defined by Webster’s Dictionary 45th edition, Tragedy is an event causing great suffering, destruction, and distress, such as a serious accident, crime, or natural catastrophe. My industry, make no mistake it is my industry, has seen a great, great many tragedies. But very few have equaled or bettered the wrongs committed against myself. Maybe the most severe tragedy committed against me is the destruction of family, spearheaded by Krista Isadora Duncan. The family unit is a mother, father and obedient child or children. I do not care about new math or what they teach in substandard schools. This family unit can be any and everything.  It can not!

RENEE
Etta’s a traditionalist.

ALIX
I bet she doesn’t even wear lace panties. Sick!

ETTTA
When you produce offspring you have, in effect, put pen to a social contract. The primary article of said contract demands you, the parental unit, guide the young mind into fulfilling the moral, protestant values that mark the bedrock of Western society. What I witnessed tonight, this Toni Patrica production, starring Maya Duncan-Blanchard was nothing short of a disgrace!

“BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

ETTA
Silence! Krista Isadora Duncan has provided Maya with the worse parenting I have seen since the children from across the county were disturbingly bussed into my district.  Krista, I do not want to hear about your upbringing, your blame for your mother, or your father. You and your ex-husband are every bit as pathetic as the creatures who spawned you!  If god could come down he’d send Ned and Krista straight to hell!

RENEE
These are some of Etta’s harshest words.

ETTA
Krista, you should have done everything in your power to protect your youngest daughter’s innocence. Now it is up to me break your daughter at Anglemania and rebuild her in the proper protestant image. And it starts with eliminating malefactors.

Suddenly, Etta was out of the ring, speed beling her voluptuous size. The former teacher of the year was at the announce desk, her hands instantly tangling through Alix’s chocolate locks!

RENEE
Alix!

Instinctly, Renee reached for Alix, but found herself much to slow for Etta Kitt. The would be Anglemania maineventer threw the former Anglemania maineventer into the ring with a deep snarl perverting Etta’s face.

ETTA
Discipline.

Alix left a pool of sweat, a byproduct of her nervousness. The bootyrific Latina had every reason for fear. Despite her best efforts to crawl away, Alix endured slap after slap to that brown ass!

via GIPHY

 

“ETTTA SUCKS! ETTA SUCKS! ETTA SUCKS!”

RENEE
Someone help Alix!

The calvary was on the way: HARD ON HOES CHAMPIOM MAYA DUNCAN BLANCHARD, TAG CHAMPS ISABELLA SPEZIA, and EPONINE BLACK and KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN  dashed into the ring! 

RENEE
The family! 

Insults of cowardice rained down upon the rapidly escaping Etta Kitt. Nonetheless, Etta staunchly refused to return to the battlefield,

RENEE
Etta’s day will come! Will that day be at Hottiemania 20?!

FADE OUT

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