Chanel #99 Posted January 31, 2022 Report Share Posted January 31, 2022 We open to our lovely and sometimes surly GM…. KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN, who sits with hands balled into a fist behind her desk. Forget the fueng shui of the room; Krista is pissed. KRISTA Hello. Welcome to Taco Duelsday. I have bad news. No one died. Yet. The Woke Queens, How2Girl and Tori Malibu were struck on Figueroa by a hit and run driver. Tori and Hayley are ok. But, in fairness they can’t challenge for the tag team titles tonight. The authroties say if you know anything please alert them immediately. Fuck that. You tell me right now what you know, cocksucker. Because when I find out who hit Hayley and Tori they’ll be my first rape of the day. I’ll post the video of you squirting when you take it from the back so all your retarded family can see it. Enjoy the show. I'm coming for you, fuckface. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted January 31, 2022 Author Report Share Posted January 31, 2022 YO QUERIO TACO BELL???? YO QUERIO MAYA’S TITS! YO QUERIO JADE’S ASS YO QUERIO LEBRENDA’S PUSSY! YO QUERIO ALL OF SAMMI AND BREA! YO QUERIO TACO DUELSDAY! We go to Sofa Central for this oddly named special event! To fit the title, Alix has gathered a bunch of tacos. RENEE Welcome to Taco Duelsday, a special Raw Is Whore! We are on the road to Anglemania and we are gonna feast on some tacos and some babes! And the biggest babe of all, Maya Duncan-Blanchard defends her title LeBrenda James. And Alix your sister Izzy teams with the technical marvel, Eponine against a very game- ALIX Mmfmffm! RENEE Hey! Are you gonna eat the whole show?! ALIX Mmfmff! RENEE Do you wanna get fat? ALIX Mmfmfmf?! Uhhh anyway…. WHO YOU TALKING TOO MAN?!! RENEE That’s the music of Lady XFL and Alysanne The Charming! The fans are on their feet, hissing and jeering to the arrival of the blond South American.... RENEE She hails from Peru and she plans on conquering the world, with sarcastic kindness it looks like. Alysanne stepped into the ring, soaking in the hatred with a slick smile. ALYSANNE So I understand since I’ve been on my vacation they nicknamed you all Deviants. “WE ARE DEVIANTS! WE ARE DEVIANTS! WE ARE DEVIANTS!” ALYSANNE Do you know what deviant means? It means someone who departs from accepted standards. Here is a fact, not an opinion, the OAOAST fans have a legacy of deviancy. RENEE Well, that’s hard to argue. ALYSANNE And the reason? Because when I debut with my sister Rhaenys you deviated from the accepted standard of beauty and talent. You did not realize, despite it being obvious, that I was the star. You people, stupid as you are, said Rhaenys would be the star. Rhaenys would be the women’s champion. Alysanne The Charming would be doing comedy skits with Deirdre and Joey The Rat. I’ve got a little question for you. Maybe you might know the answer. Where is Rhaenys now? Do you see her on the roster? Do you see her on TV? I just want to know where my sister is. I’m worried about her. RENEE So disengious. ALYSANNE But you know where I am and where I have been. After Anglemania I took a bit of a vacation. Barbados, Costa Rica, Monaco, Milan, Barcelno. A well-deserved vacation. But all good things have to come to an end. And all good things have to start. In our case restart. Our? Oh yes, you didn’t think you were done with The Lady XFL, did you? ALIX Uh-oh spaghettios ALYSANNE They used to call me Alysanne The Charming. Now they can call me Alysanne The Diamond, because I am as valuable and beautiful as any gem you have ever seen. Who else but me could orchestrate the Anglemania 20 Hottie’s Edition mainevent? RENEE What is she talking about? ALYSANNE Obviously I had to go above Krista’s empty head to talk to the real power, Toni Patrica. And obviously she loved my idea: Lady XFL in the mainevent competing for the Hard On Hoes Championship! “CANCEL THE NETWORK! CANCEL THE NETWORK! CANCEL NETWORK!” RENEE What?! How can that be? Lady XFL is skipping the line! ALIX No big deal. I skip the line at Del Taco all the time. It’s just black people in the line anyway. RENEE ………… Well, Alix’s racist comment can be disregarded because we hear……… Obey We hope you have a lovely dayObey You don't want us to come out and play Away, now now There's nothing to see here It's under control We're only gambling with your soulObey Whatever you do, just don't wake up and smell the corruption A woman almost as disliked as Sgt.Holt arrived into the Toy Box. Despite the immense disgust aimed her way, Etta made a confident stride into the ring. RENEE Tonight, Etta Kitt tries to teach Jade a lesson on being a proper lad. ETTA Alysanne “The Charming” I am pleased to meet you. Your scheming, dirty tricks, and underhanded behavior have placed you in an echelon above your sister. Because that’s all you want. To be above Rhaenys. Allow me to offer you a lesson. ALYSANNE You’re going to teach me a lesson? Miss no name? ETTA I am Etta Kitt, and I will be your teacher for this moment. Alysanne you are struggling to define yourself as an individual compared Rhaynes. I feel confident that you saw that your sister was superior in all things compared to you at a young age. This is the crux of a sibling rivalry. Rhaenys continued to excel in her activies while you lagged behind. In order to compensate for your inferiority, you developed an overly kind, fake personality. But you still felt the childhood trauma of your inferiority. You could no longer hold up the act of kindness and you grew bitter. That, Toy Box, is the lesson in childhood trauma, and neglecting a child’s needs. Though I would hope most of you have vasectomies and never have children! ALYSANNE You are incredibly lucky, you wrinkled bitch, that Lady XFL is training for her mainevent and not here. Because if she was in the Toy Box that would be the end of you! ETTA Lady XFL. Hmph. I’ve seen her kind many times. Lazy, stupid students who think they will get by on athletic gifts alone. But what happens when they come across an athlete just as talented as them, but with the gift of intelligence? Lady XFL is banned for life from the LFL for sexually assaulting her coach in the shower. Correct? ALYSANNE They weren’t paying the players on time. ETTA A disgusting way to resolve conflict. She is as demented as the women she sexually torments. Both her and the uncouth, sick, depraved “hotties” deserve each other. And as far as sexual assault, I am certain, 100 percent certain Lady Xena deserves the same desecration of lady parts. ALYSANNE Desecration? ETTA Look it up. But before that, listen to what I think about Lady Xena. We see she has never learned the lesson of self-control. This is a lesson we teach five year olds. You manage a large kindergartner. Her teachers were unable to reach her because she is a lazy, idiot, jock. ALYSANNE I think you should choose your words more carefully, lady. Those old brittle bones can break easily. ETTA Since I am a master of the English language, I will choose my words carefully. I hope to reach Xena now, Alysanne. With a simple message: there will be no Anglemania mainevent for you. Whoever wins the title match tonight, LeBrenda or that …that…that…vile…sexually active teenager, Maya, will encounter Etta Kitt and her Pedigree! ALSYANNE I don’t know what to say. ETTA Inferior minds are usually left speechless when confronted by a woman of intellect. ALYSANE Are you a moron? ETTA Did you just ask- MOMENT OF SILENCE FOR THE CHAMPIONS!! RENEE It’s the number one contender, the woman who will take on Maya Duncan Blanchard tonight for the Hard On Hoes Title! LeBrenda struts to the ring, making a belt motion around her waist before she notices a sign that says “MJ=GOAT.” At that point she turned red and ripped up the sign. ALIX That’s my friend Paco and that sign meant his friend Matthew James, big TMW fan with stage 5 lung cancer, is the GOAT. LeBrenda slid into the ring, sporting a Clippers jersey…with the logo X’ed out. Which would make her popular….except she opens her mouth LEBRENDA Yo, yo, yo! I hope you two are listening. Don’t you ever tell me who I’m facing in ANYTHING! Don’t tell me I’m gonna be in the bed with Booker X when I’m only fucking Painbow! RENEE Of course she picks the guy who played basketball. LEBRENDA Keep talking your talk, Etta Kitt, you just a Christ Nowitzkini rip off. I’ll hit you with a Slam Dunk and send your ass to his brain institute! Etta Kitt clenched her fists and turned away from LeBrenda LEBRENDA Alysanne, I ain’t speaking to you. I don’t talk to rip offs, let me get at Rhaenys instead. “OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH! More clenched fists. This time from Alysanne. LEBRENDA Lady XFL, I’m put this real simple to you, you gonna get my message because I’m gonna speak your language “Durr…durrr….durrr….no title shot for you! Durrrrrr!” Now put that in your drool bag, stooopid! ALIX That type of promo makes my nipples hard, Renee! It reminds me of seeing my dad play ball in those short Pumas. And ohhh those post ups did it for me when he was one bein posted up. My daddy’s got good timing when they do that dribble backdown. He takes all their cookies more times than not! RENEE Talk less. Please. We’re not done Yet! Because Taylor Swift’s Shake it Off booms to life! I stay out too late Got nothing in my brain That's what people say, mmm-mmm That's what people say, mmm-mmm I go on to many dates [chuckle] But I can't make 'em stay At least that's what people say, mmm-mmm That's what people say, mmm-mmm But I keep cruising Can't stop, won't stop moving It's like I got this music In my mind Singing, "It's gonna be alright." 'Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake I shake it off, I shake it off Heart-breakers gonna break, break, break, break, break And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake I shake it off, I shake it off RENEE Oh my! Oh my, the boss has arrived! And Krista’s cuuuuummm looking good…. RENEE She didn’t come just to dance and hawk t-shirts, did she?? ALIX She doesn’t look too mad. Good! I don’t have to sleep in the tent tonight. RENEE She makes you sleep in a tent in a house with 12 bedrooms? KRISTA Hello, ladies. Accdiental wrestling reference, don’t shoot me. Though the wrestler was a pornstar so gimmie some credit. Hi. I’m Krista. Nice to meet you. I make the matches around here. Like really make the matches because I got a sound guy’s dick sucked by Brit…while Nikki fucked him in the pooper with her nightstick. I didn’t expect that part. What I do expect from you gorgeous gals is to realize I’m the boss, you’re in the independent contractor. I tell you what to do, you do what I say, and…I also get a portion of any outside income you make despite having no involvement in the earning of said income. I love capitalism. ALIX KRISTA I’ll address you in order of people I’m least likely to release: LeBrenda, you have won nothing, you are not Hard On Hoes champion. Honey, you might not even make it to Anglemania 20. I might have you hosting a Livestream Watch Party on Twitch. Whatever that means. Billie was rambling about it. It’s hard enough to have sex with drug addicts, it’s harder when they’re Gen-Z! ALIX Millienial, right here! RENEE Millenial?! Well, pro wrestling isn’t always honest. KRISTA Alysanne, honey, I’m glad you enjoyed your luxury box with Toni Patrica. I know the closest you usually get to luxury is when you scrape together five dollars to buy Suave Luxury Daily Cleansing Shampoo from Rhonda Singleton at the Wal-Mart. Toni said it would be lovely to have yous and Lady XFL’s presence at Anglemania. So, honey, it would be my joy and delight to give Xena’s hot ambiguous race ass a match in Madison Square Garden. Against an opponent who I take great care and so much pleasure in choosing. Who WILL NOT be the Hard On Hoes Champion. LEBRENDA Told your ass! ALYSANNE Not a title match?! KRISTA I’m sorry, darling, but no. ALYSANNE You.Have.Made.A.Mistake. KRISTA I did that when I got pregnant with Jade and it turned out it okay. RENEE That’s one of the worst compliments I’ve ever heard! KRISTA And Jade brings me to Etta Kitt. Etta Kitt smiled a twisted smug grin. KRISTA Etta Kitt, you were forced upon me by Toni, who I love to death and would do anything for and too! And it feels so wonderful when she orders me around. I like being dominated by black women. But, she AND you have me all heated up! ETTA I will say the same to you! In much more dignified terms. Your parenting skills have angered me. You have raised a daughter with no redeemable features, who prides herself on being a trash receptacle for male ejaculate! “WE LOVE JADE! WE LOVE JADE! WE LOVE JADE!” ETTA All of you should be quiet! Do you know her point of pride is her rear end’s ability to engulf large black genitals?! “YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!” KRISTA That’s mama’s girl! ETTA And your youngest daughter- ALYSANNE Heh. Alysanne knew Etta was about to fuck up. And Etta Kit was smart enough to realize it as well. ETTA There is still hope for her. I do not care what you have to say right now at Taco Duelsday. Anglemania 20 is another day- KRISTA No shit. ETTA And on that day I will humble, discipline and defeat your daughter for the Hard on Hoes title. And following that day, I will remake her in my own image. KRISTA Yeah, that ending line was so lame I can’t really do a cutesy but life-threatening way to counter it. So, enjoy the show, kids! And LeBrenda, I’m gonna need to take an 80 percent cut on your baskestball line instead of 25. LEBRENDA We negotiated 25! KRISTA The negotiation got renegotiated. RENEE An explosive start to Anglemania 20! ALIX A lot riding on the matches tonight, partner. RENEE And a lot of Hotties riding on some thick dongs tonight! ALIX Awesome followup! High Five! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted January 31, 2022 Author Report Share Posted January 31, 2022 Backstage, we find….. THE DOLL, the assistant GM on her job as well. The glamorous gal approaches someone we haven’t see in a while… CADY OF GRIM THE DOLL Wow, Cady, I forgot how beautiful you are. It will look so funny seeing you against those dorks, Rizzo and the other guy. Please embarrass them. And come back and we’ll talk a nude photoshoot! CAD My father has, Sadist, taught me this; All humans are destined to collapse... The penis shrinks, and the vagina withers.Nothing begets existence...and existence begets nothing... THE DOLL Okaaaaay. I’m gonna let you go now. The Doll backs away slowly, very slowly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted January 31, 2022 Author Report Share Posted January 31, 2022 We’re taken to the ring where Lillian Garcia is looking as good and a slutty as any of our Hotties…. LILLIAN The following handicap two on one match is scheduled for one fall! In the ring, we have….um…well.. RIZZETTE(?) Don’t worry, we got this toots. Yes, in the ring we have the dragged out, awfully dressed, woman impersonating, Scumbag Reformation Project. RENEE People are qutting their jobs left and right. But, Rizzo and Anson are clinging to theirs. RIZETTE(?) Hey, uh, I’m you know I’m Rizette, a cool woman, you know, you know. And this is my main bitch ANSON Man! RIZETTE Hey, not in a gay way! I mean this is my bff, my homegirl, you know, you know/ RENEE Did her forget Anson’s fake name? Yes he did. ANSON Ansonia. It’s Roman, ya’ll. Roamn. And, I’m gonna throw it back to Rizzo. But I don’t mean throwing my ass! RIZETTE Yeah, we’re living our, you know, our truth. But we still fuck women! ANSON Get it straight, ya’ll. RIZETTE Cus we’re, you know, we’re straight. RENEE Triple Patty is backstage pressing the dump button and getting chewed out by Vince149. ANSON And we get tons of bitches. Tons! I can't use what I can't abuse And I can't stop when it comes to you You burned me out but I'm back at your door Like Joan of Arc coming ack for more I nearly died I nearly died I nearly died I came to cut you up, I came to knock you down I came around to tear your little world apart I came to shut you up, I came to drag you down I came around to tear your little world apart and break your soul apart via GIPHY RENEE Thank god for the demonic Cady of Grim! This is the daughter of Sadist. I don’t mean to be rude, but I have a hard time imagining being raised by Sadist leads to well developed audlt. ALIX Whatchu talking about, hoe? Sadist was a locker room leader back in the day. One time this dude named Damaramu refused to job to Krista so Sadist shoved a baseball bat up ass and made him dress in the women’s bathroom. And then some arena worker walked in on Damaramu and he got arrested! That was when wrestling was wrestling. LILLIAN And introducing their opponent! Returning to Raw Is Whore after a two year absence, she hails from White Deer, Texas….she is THE SEMEN DEMON….CADY OF GRIM! RENEE I see. Deviants, we’re looking at a towering six foot deviant in her own right. ALIX When ya got a name like Semen Demon you ain’t leading the church choir! DING DING DING Rizzette and Ansonia suddenly realized the trouble they were in when Cady started flexing her boobs! There was no honor in theifs as Rizzette shoved Anson towards a Cady thrust kick! ALIX We don’t know a whole lot about Rizette and Ansonia. Big opportunity for them on the big stage, Renee. RENEE Uh, we do know a lot about them! They’re scammers, liars, and thieves! It’s just Rizzo and Anson Carter. Lisa Ann fired them and they’re scamming their way back. Ansonia got lucky: Cady pitched him out of the ring! The poor guy landed so hard, the stuffing in his pushup bra fell out. But at least he didn’t have to fight Cady! RENEE Why? Just leave The Toy Box, dudes. Rizette ate a lariat with enough power to twist his wig around and blind the bastard. ALIX Folks, I think that wig came from the Chinaman. Gotta assume it’s using Phillipine hair and not the good kind of Asian hair. RENEE Holy racism, Batman! Rizette stumbled around the ring, his blindness getting worse with each shift of his lousy wig. We then had meeting of the minds as Cady banged the Rizzo’s noggin against the returning Anson’s skull. Ansonia flew off the apron with a wild crash into the guardrail. Less than sympathetic, the Deviants chuckled at his suffering. ALIX Folks, let’s call that the meeting of the retards. RENEE No! You definitely shouldn’t call it that! Rizzo’s misery seemed never ending as Cady swatted the blows away with bored ease. CADY Your penis might caps out at 5! You do not deseve a cock, inferior cur! Cady weren’t all talk! The Semen Demon clutched onto Rizzo’s balls to elicit a horrible scream! RENEE I don’t think she’s looking for sperm! Ansonia stumbled into the ring: this was nothing more than a grave error. His black balls found themselves seized by the iron grip of Cady of Grim! ALIX She ain’t looking to make any black babies! The two drag queens screamed their submissions in shrill, girly voices! RENEE Listen to that, something girly about them! The two men collapsed onto each other once Cady released them. Sadly they fell into a 69 position. RENEE Gifs and memes are now cemented. Winner: Cady of Grim, by submission Post-match Cady commandeered a frightened cameraman! CADY I will render all who oppose me to ashes! Feel the might, feel the power of the pussy that crushes mountains! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 1, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2022 In the parking garage of The Toy Box, which happens to see a lot of action, we find the nervous pacing… DREAMY Not exactly attuned to people’s emotions, comes a cheerful…. KATHY KAREN KELLY KKK Dream Team! Why are you in the parking garage? Did I miss a new challenge we gotta do? Billie is getting problematic. I’m done holding her heard while she pukes up pills. Dunzo! DREAMY I’m about to be majorly screwed! KKK Yeah, you do look like someone told you Travis Scott was about to play at your birthday party. DREAMY I promised Krista my big time friends would come into Taco D. and totally cancel those loser Nerdregards. And my homegirls are no shows. And Tabby ditched me also. I feel like a main piece who’s man chooses the baby mama. If they don’t come Krista says I gotta face her in the cage. I’m dead like Anothony Davis’ career! “BBBBBBOOOOOOOOO!” The listening crowd hisses. DREAMY Don’t boo me! And mind your business, chumpstains! KKK You tell em, Dreamy! And your totally gonna roll over Krista like The Clippers would roll over The Lakers in a playoff series. “BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” DREAMY (nervously) Whoa, whoah, let’s not hate on Krista! She is caucuasian magic! KKK That’s an awesome nickname, Dream Team! Better for me than that woman you’re totally gonna destroy! DREAMY Sadly, Dreamy has further problems as the always present…. MITAMA And…. HINA, arrive for their usual judgey observations. MITAMA Sister, sister look, it is Dreamy. She is so pathetic I can barely stand to look at her HINA Mitama, Mitama, I feel nauseous. DREAMY What the fuck? Why are two even here?! MITAMA Do not curse. It degrades an already worthless person Oh it can get worse! Because an arms folded, scowling THE DOLL strides with a purpose to Dreamy. MITAMA Sister, sister, look, the corpse of a once beautiful woman approached. HINA Mitama, Mitama, I am afraid of her zombie like appearance! THE DOLL You both need to just leave me alone for once! Dreamy? DREAMY Uh…no I am her twin sister, Nightmare. THE DOLL You promised two big names, two big second generation names. The call time was 1:30. It’s 7:30. They aren’t here. Where are they? DREAMY I’m, Nightmare, so you’ll have to ask Dreamy. DREAMY ….Then tell Dreamy she needs to get ready for her cage match against Krista. DREAMY *gul* RENEE It’s looking like a tough night for “The American Wet Dream” Dreamy! ALIX It’s kinda sad for that Nightmare though. It’s hard to be the ugly twin. RENEE How did you survive so long being like you are? ALIX You can get pretty far if you’re willing to give a bunch of blowjobs! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 1, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2022 Up in the ring our very own Alix Maria Spezia is joined by Hotties tag champions Chicks Over Black Dicks. ALIXFor the benefit of the blind, I’m here with my little sis, Isabella Spezia, and her partner in tag not in life, Eponine Black. And babes, the mood has yet to change after news of the accident to Tori Malibu and How2Girl. IZZYWhat a terrible thing to happen to such good people. Ebb and I were just as excited about our rematch as all the fans. For fate to intervene like this... I-I’m still at a loss for words. Two people who weren’t, DIDI and PIPI BIGGUNS, who arrive to the tune of “My Boobs Are OK” by Lene Alexandra. DIDIBoo-hoo, boo-hoo-hoo. Pipi wipes away mock tears as she and Didi confront the champs. RENEE(points to Alix & COBD) For the benefit of the blind, the deaf and the stupid, the Bigguns are perfectly okay unlike Tori and How2Girl. PIPIYeah! Forget the Woke Queens. They’re BROKE QUEENS by the sound of it! DIDII mean riding to the area instead of taking a limo? Which is how real stars travel. PIPIYeah! Like us! DIDIThey probably let their looney mascot behind the wheel too. Now because of them the OAOAST is exposed to potential lawsuits over false advertising! EPONINEDon’t tell me. You have a solution to nip that in the bud being the good little cocksuckers you are? DIDI & PIPI😮 DIDIHey, you may get off making bitches tap, but for me it’s cold hard cash and jewelry, especially gold. PIPIYeah! And those belts sure are shiny. Eponine hands her title to the ref, signals for the Bigguns to break it. “YYEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!” RENEEAlix, get out of there! We may have ourselves a tag title match after all! The Bigguns snatch the belts away and pose with them... “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” ... only to try and cheap shot the champs! But COBD duck, with Ebb taking down Didi in the HEART OF ICE CROSSFACE while Izzy nails Pipi with a SUNSET FLIP PILEDRIVER!!! RENEEBurning Sensation When You Urinate! The bell sounds and we get a simultaneous tap and 1-2-3! Winners: Chicks Over Black Dicks! RENEEOh my gosh! That may be a OAOAST record! As the champs celebrate we unexpectedly cut backstage where EUPHORIA, ice bag sloppily wrapped over head, hurls a BASEBALL BAT at the back of a heavily damaged speeding CAR! EUPHORIA You’re dead, bitch! You hear me! Dddeeaadd! Ow! *touches head* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 1, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2022 Backstage we find the legendary, much despised and much lusted after… ANNAGRET WICKEDBORN She’s soon approached by…. KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN And MISS KUNT! ANNAGRET Oh, look, it’s Krista and Miss DORK! KRISTA Are you upset about something? ANNAGRET Ugh! No, quit prying! Miss Dork, it looks like your runt girlfriend, Zelda Bazil, is too shook to own up to her fuck up. Typical Bazil, right? It’s sooooooo lame that Lucius Soul wasted all that black awesomess hanging around Remy. So, Cinnamon and I are gonna kick your butt by yourself. IS THAT OKAY? OVERLOAD KRISTA! KRISTA I’m starting to sense some anger from you. Did I delete the Mandingo porn off your pho…HOLY SHIT LOOK OUT! Look out indeed, bitches! Cinnamon Spoons, attired in her wild leather outfit soars through! Not alone but on her beloved, unruly horse CHUB CHUB! CINNAMON Yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiikes!!! MISS KUNT A horsey! CINNAMON The maiden of justice arrives on her trusty steed! Fear us evil, for your future is bleak! KRISTA Is it supposed to be that big? I mean like really, let’s talk about that. Because how can we not? Is that CGI in real life? Are we in the matrix? ANNAGRET Oh-em-gee! This company will do anything not to focus on MOI! Do you realize I’m a literal goddess? Miss Dork, I’m sorry your dad died in you arms and that he was a shady loser and you can’t pick good friends. But that’s not my problem. My dad is a god. G-O-D! And me and this loser’s mom is a valkyrie. What are you? MISS KUNT I’m a fighter! A practitioner of Kunt-Fun! KRISTA It’s gigantic, Cinnamon. Is it okay? Is it cursed? MISS KUNT A pact between girls is a pact made in the heat of our gushing sex! ANNAGRET Excuse me? What? MISS KUNT The cunt juice I’ve shed in my love for Zelda and the cunt juice she’s shed in her love for me gives me faith! Faith that we will meet you in- ANNAGRET BWHAHAHAAH! Stop right there. Dude, she’s just not into you. If she gave a shit she’d be here. MISS KUNT You don’t know Zelda! ANNAGRET Oh-em-gee, I just can’t right now. Cinnamon? CINNAMON Your so called friend is craven! The very surname Bazil is infested with the lice of cowardice! If she shows her face, I’ll rip off that witch hat and have ChubChub trample it into itty bitty pieces! My sister demands it! She is the princess and I am her loyal heroine! ANNAGRET Hmph. MISS KUNT But…but….we’re girls… CINNAMON I’m no girl, weakling! I ride the most well endowed steed in the nine realms! When the opressed turn to the sky and they open their eyes, they see Cinnamon and ChubChub soaring to their resuce! KRISTA Maybe, I’m getting too old, but this is driving me nuts. I’m not gonna let a girl with one and a half years experience go alone against literal deities. What was I thinking? How did I let it get this far? There’s a tug on Krista’s shoulder belonging to…. THE SOCCER MOM TSM Hey, Krista, hi. KRISTA Hheheh, why hello there? You like uhhh stuff? TSM Of course! I like all sorts of stuff! I like baking pies, and playing with my cat- ANNAGRET Like, ugh! If you really wanna do some stuff, how about you go jump off a bridge! TSM Actually, I just want to be Stacy’s partner. MISS K I told you not to call me Stacy! ANNAGRET Stacy, Stacy, Stacy! Bwhaahaahh! TSM Krista, you asked me to watch out for Stacy. And…well, here I am. KRISTA So we’ve determined that in place of a cowardly, tiny, yet magically gifted second-generation wrestler, a barely trained, middle-aged, YouTube reality show winner is better. ANNAGRET It wasn’t YouTube. It was Dailymotion. BWHAHAAHAHAHA! Did you watch all the eps, Stacy? Did you, Stacy? Did you bookmark them, Stacy!? CINNAMON ChubChub and I hunger for justice! We rode all the way here from Nevada and only trampled a few migrants! And they understand we were on the quest for justice! And Susan Leslie, Soccer Mom, you are a foe to justice and the friends of justice everywhere! You have offended my sister and me and my Wild Pegasus demand JUSTICE! KRISTA I just get this sinking feeling that offending a Wild Pegasus is a bad idea. TSM Great! I hope we have a good match! ANNAGRET Ugh! Dorks everywhere! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 1, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2022 Miss K entered to “Knock You Out by” Bingo Players with TSM tta My fight is wonWho needs a gunBoom boom knock you outYou knocked me downBut who's laughing nowBoom boom knock you outMy fight is wonWho needs a gunBoom boom knock you outYou knocked me downBut who's laughing nowBoom boom knock you out via GIPHY Off with your headDance til you're deadHeads will rollHeads will rollHeads will rollOn the floor RENEE I know Stacy can be overbearing, but she has to have friends in the back? Someone to help her besides the Soccer Mom? ALIX Ain’t none of those girls friends, bitch. Shhhiiii, them skeezers is hoes and TriplePatty and Vince149 are thricks. Sheeeeeeeit. By the way, can someone send me more bean and Christmas cake tacos? Fire & Ice enter separately and Cinnamon came firs to “Heads Wil Roll” by The Yeah Yeah Yeahs.. RENEE For worse and much worse, Annagret is the leader of Fire & Ice. She barks, Cinnamon listens. But, Cinnamon is no background player. She is one of our louder personalities who seems to only see things in black and white. What do you think Alix? ALIX I think she’s a disgrace to the Big Sister League of America! I don’t do anything Isabella tells me to do, because I’m the big sister. Izzy can SUGGEST I stick two fingers in her booty. But she can’t TELLE me to do it. RENEE Somehow you made your point. Annagret entered to “Sex” by Collette Carrr Sex, the way you move it make me wanna Sex, question is are we gonna Sex, we ain't kids... Sex, I know we just met but listen Sex, the way you move it make me wanna Sex, question is are we gonna Sex, we ain't kids... Sex, no disrespect but I need your sex via GIPHY Face down, ass up, that's the way I shake my butt RENEE In way, Annagret brings up a decent point. Would any other deity be asked to tolerate all the issues she tolerates? ALIX That’s rigjt! Are you seeing Vishna down here being harassed by white guys on Sunset when the man is just looking for some rappers? Does Jesus gotta deal with porn directors who don’t want anal creampies? And let’s talk that hoe ass nigga Allah- RENEE Let’s not! DING DING DING CINNAMON The maiden of justice, The One Woman Onslaught, arrives to defend the honor of her sister and the oppressed around the world! RENEE Really, all thatn happened is Zelda is clumsy, Annagret tripped over at Anglemania, How2Girl decked Annagret and Annagret’s team lost. That’s it. And it has spiraled into this mess. MISS KUNT Ummm? I’m not sure how to respond. But, it’s great to see a woman stand up to the degeneracy of the male gender! RENEE That’s not what she said. ANNAGRET Bwhahahaha, Stacy!! Your dad was a dork for like two months, then he ditched Baron and everyone knows his name! You’ve been a dork since I met you a year ago, Stacy! And who knows who you are, Stacy? MISS KUNT As women, we need to respect each other! And I ask that you respect that I don’t like to be called Stacy. ANNAGRET Cinny, she’s being mean to me! TSM Hold on a minute! I understand believing in your family. But, Cinnamon, do you think your sister is truly honest with you? TSM’s question merely led to Cinnamon decking Miss K with a lariat straight out of Valhalla. ALIX Sorry, Susan Leslie, but that dog don’t hunt. TSM watched as Cinnamon bumrushed Miss K into the corner with a worried frown. Reminiscent of Bum Fights, The Spice of Life delivered wild punches into the gut of her foe. CINNAMON Pssst, ChubChub is watching so can you make it look like I’m super powerful and beating you up real bad?? MISS KUNT I can’t! It’s my duty as your fellow female to give you fair combat. That didn’t please Cinnamon one bit…. ANNAGRET Ugh, I’m surrounded by total dorks! CINNAMON Oh no! Anny, I didn’t hear you! Are you okay? ANNAGRET Huh? I was just telling everyone I’m surrounded by a great elder sister every day! CINNAMON You are the beacon that guides my battleship through rough waters! RENEE It’s time someone did something about Annagret taking advantage of Cinnamon. This isn’t right. ALIX Yeah! Big sisters are supposed to take advantage of of sexually abuse kid sisters. RENEE That’s not what I meant… Miss K offered Cinnamon a fair and respectable lockup. But, unfortunately, Stacy’s naivety bought a her standing big boot! ANNAGRET That’s my move, but okay whatevs. RENEE She’s rotten to the core. ALIX Rotten, but that core is one juicy thang! Just like these orange peels and raddish tacos! RENEE That’s what stinks! Miss K crawled upright against the ropes, with urging and support heaped on her by TSM. That only annoyed Miss K, which led to distractions that saw her endure a clothesline to the back by Cinnamon! RENEE Ooof! Big blow from a big sister! CINNAMON Miss Kunt, your cunt must be punished in the name of JUSTICE! RENEE That sounds interesting. The Deviants rose to their feet, hoots and yells already escaping their lips. They watched with glee as Cinnamon mounted Miss K in grounded head scissors. “FUCK THE KUNT! FUCK THE KUNT! FUCK THE KUNT!” MISS KUNT DEGENERATE MALES! Misdirected anger: thy name is Miss Kunt. Masturbation: thy name is Miss Kunt! Cinnamon pleased men (and lesbos) world wide with her version of justice… “YYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” ALIX Justice, huh? The Judge Judy fantasies die hard. TSM That’s wrong! Stop it! CINNAMON-+*/6 Susan Leslie, you vile puke! It is time to enact Winged Avalanche Number 5 and make you beg for forgiveness. Winged Avalanche Number 5 turned out to be simply a body bump. But it was enough to drop TSM to the apron. ALIX How about these gingerbread and pineapple Christmas tacos? Yum-yum for the tum-tum! Cinnamon turned around with the heathen intent of a filthy pagan who hates Christmas. But Miss Kunt rocked her with a discus punch! This left The Spice of Life Woozy, but not woozy enough to prevent recovery with a polish hammer effort. But Cinnamon moved too slow and swung too long as Miss K countered with a leg sweep! RENEE Kunt-Fu in action! Cinnamon kipped up, eyes flashing confident defiance! MISS KUNT A worthy foe! Ugly males could never fight so courageously! Even though she complimented the Lovelock, Nevada native, Miss K still struck her throat with a throat chop. Coughing and wheezing, Cinnamon involuntarily put herself through the pain of a Pump Kick! “YYYYEAAAAAA!” MISS KUNT Don’t cheer me, degenerate males! “YOU ROCK, MISS K!” Shouted a 56 year old biker lesbian MISS KUNT Thank you so much!!! I love you! ANNAGRET Moving on from Zelda, Stacy? It’s for the best, Stacy. I think you’ll be happier with the fat biker lesbian than Zelda,Stacy. Cinnamon sprung on Miss K’s anger, and surprised her with a leg hook front face lock. Yet, Miss K surprised HER with a small package! ONE Easy kickout! RENEE A small package will never beat Cinnamon. ALIX Small package from a lineage of big packages! Cinnamon began walloping Miss K with blows, using brute force to disarm Kunt Fu. The Spice of Life beat Miss K all the way to the odd couple corner. Sanity would say let Stacy fight back. But The Soccer Mom must be nuts because she hurriedly tagged herself in. via RedGIFs RENEE What do you think you’re doing? ALIX Susan tagged herself in. As the kid’s say this shit is a dub, time to toke up while we run a Man Mountain Rock vid package. Hear he’s gonna be huge! RENEE Even if you did give blowjobs to get ahead, I would think you’d exhaust all goodwill at some point. ALIX I do it on camera. RENEE Not a shocker. TSM nervously entered the ring, goosebumps on her pretty skin. Worse yet, her knees trembled. ANNAGRET Cinnamon, Cinnamon, tag me, tag me, tag me! RENEE If Annagret gets the tag I honestly fear for Susan’s safety. She’s a reality show winner trying to beat a literal goddess. CINNAMON But, Annie, I wish for you to remain safe against the nefarious forces of doom! ANNAGRET Jus shut the….uh, lemme shut the door on this match. You’ve worked so hard already. CINNAMON You are so sweet! Cinnamon gave into false flattery and tagged her younger sister. This elicited a roar of shock, anger, and a little excitement from the Deviants. But, The Snowbunny decided to just kick back and relax on the turnbuckle pads… ANNAGRET Are you coming, Susan? ALIX Partner, it’s like my father used to say, this woman Susan, is as useful as a one legged man in ass kicking contest. RENEE Your father never said that. And get that gross crab and green and red sprinkle taco away from me! Susan felt intense trepidation, overwhelming her. Beads of sweat soaked her forehead. RENEE I don’t like this at all. The hoots and hollers of the crowd put her futher on edge. MISS KUNT Tag me back in! ANNAGRET I know I look good, Susan, but you’re staring a little too hard. Only the offensive line of the Rams can look at me like this. Not those white dorks they have though! RENEE It’s surreal to have a Norse goddess reference American football. ALIX Mmfmfm! RENEE You’re spitting Christmas sprinkles on me. Susan decided to put her best foot forward and fight for what she believed in. Alas, Annagret put her best foot forward lashing out at incredible speeds for a big boot! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” The (white) fans hissed some throwing their drinks into the ring! ANNAGRET It’s soooo funny how I so don’t care about you white losers! I’m just gonna lie down for one of my chocolate daddies to put me on a leash and make me their little doggy! ALIX Defund the police. All we need is Annagret to go into the inner city and heal the wounds the system has caused my dark skinned brothers. RENEE I can’t believe you haven’t been suspended or fined once in your life. ALIX Is it really a fine if you never pay it? Miss Kunt fumed fabulously on the ring apron. I mean really, really, really fabulously and sweaty… A woman of great courage, and naivety, TSM charged forward for a running elbow drop….and ate nothing but mat with Annagret rolling out the way! TSM Ouch! ANNAGRET Bwhahahh! Ouch! Bwhaahah! Go home and be a family woman, Susan! Your white husband and white kids need you! TSM I have a black husband and a biracial kids. RENEE That was the wrong reply. BAM! BAM! BAM! Annagret rained stomps upon TSM’s skull! The suburban nice gal couldn’t handle them and began crying from the pain! ANNAGRET Aren’t you gonna do something, Stacy? You too chicken shit to do anything, Stacy? Heh. Guess it’s obvious why you crush on Zelda. You wanna be a Bazil too! Bwhahahah! Stacy felt nothing but fury! How she wanted into the ring but couldn’t get past Clem Buzzlefoxxer V! MISS KUNT Hands off me degenerate male! ANNAGRET Hmmm? You don’t like boys, huh? You keep an eye out for any hot chicks, then? Annagret suddenly grabbed Miss K by her noir hair and flung Stacy into the ring! RENEE Hey! That’s not cool at all! ANNAGRET What do you think, Stacy, like what you see? Long legs, tight body, even tighter ass….Bwhahahaha, you’ve been lusting after a girl with a 9th grader’s ass. Lemme give you the grown woman version. TSM I can’t allow that! What Susan will or won’t allow mattered not as Annagret drilled her with an uppercut. The Soccer Mom was left dazed, possibly concussed and severely broken on the mat. RENEE This is disgusting! ALIX Susan won a reality show, and now she’s getting the reality of the OAOAST. By a supernatural goddess. Who is also the daughter of a mythical being. A prone Stacy was given no choice, none whatsoever but too taste the goodness of Annagret’s hot white ass! “WE LOVE RIMJOBS! WE LOVE RIMJOBS! WE LOVE RIMJOBS!” The crowd howled. ANNAGRET How about it, Stacy? Can you taste al the black dicks, Stacy? Stacy only tasted defeated and shame as Annagret further ground her ass into Miss Kunt’s face. The Deviants’s shouts and grunts of satisfaction overwhelmed the microphone, the sound of so many forcing the Fluffer’s to attend to their needs. RENEE The Buzzlefoxxer family is the worst refereeing family ever! ALIX Just wanna send a Christmas get well to little Clemmy The 8th, fighting lung cancer at Saint Judes. His big dream is referee a Christmas TMW main event between Lawson and Wes! RENEE Damn it. TSM I….I….can’t allow this. This can’t happen. ANNAGRET Bwhahaha! Hey, Cinnamon, look! Here comes trouble! Annagret did not take Susan’s threats with an inch of concern. Yet for our Valkyrie it was though someone replaced her horse with a reindeer! Cinnamon immediately pounced upon the rising Soccer Mom, snaring her into a rear waistlock! CINNAMON The only thing you can make happen is your screams of death, thanks to Cyclone Whopper Delta! ANNAGRET Ugh, am I on dork patro….I mean, uhhh? Susan, let’s end this. It’s Christmas, and me and Cinnamon are very understanding deities. If you just, say, bark like I dog we will let you go. TSM ….Arf! ANNAGRET Bwhahah! She did it! She barked! Quack like a duck! TSM Quack! ANNAGRET Bwhhahah! Moo! TSM ….Mooooooooooooooo moooooooooooo! RENEE This is so sad. ALIX I lost my Christmas smile. ANNAGRET Not bad, not bad. Cinnamon, what do you think? CINNAMON Annie, no, Annie, no! Cinnamon Spoons, The Spice of Life, requests to carry out justice! ANNAGRET Hmph. Fine. Annagret watched a with distached smirk as Cinnamon attached a double nerve hold onto Susan! RENEE No! Look how much she’s pain! Susan whimpered and wailed, tears flowing from her eyes. The hold known as a Pinch of Cinnamon produced the type of pain rarely seen our shows. It brought Susan to lowest pain imaginable; beaten, disheveled, and a quivering mound of flesh on the mat. ANNAGRET Since I am the legal diety… Annagret placed her leather boot on Susan’s stomach for the ultimate in arrogant cover…. ONE! TWO! THREE! Winner: Fire & Ice, via pinfall RENEE This is the type of win that turns my stomach. ALIX Mine too, ReeRee! It makes me not wanna eat my salmon and candy cane taco. Fire & Ice have taken bullying past levels Krista even thought of. “Hey, Rico, that can’t be an OAOAST photo of you. You’re not on flat on your back!” That’s good natured bullying. These two are just different. It got worse…. ANNAGRET Thank you, thank you, thank you! No applause, please. Because your opinion is meaningless too me. Unless you're black! Then keep em coming, along with all that juicy baby batter. I’ll be eating way to much chocolate during your earth holiday season. But hungry animals like Stacy and Susan are going to go without. That is why I, The Snowbunny, have started the “Bunny Hop” food charity! Charities are supposed to be about giving, so, Susan, Stacy, your hungry mouths are about to get fed! Two stagehands rolled wheelbarrows of what looked like dog food towards the ring. ANNAGRET Move faster! You call that help?! The stage hands finally got the food to the side of the ring. ANNAGRET Get them in the proper position or I swear to my father you’ll get hurt! You’re a little too young to throw away your life! As the stage hands put food directly in front the LED Ramp, Annagret turned to Cinnamon. ANNAGRET Cinnamon, all animals deserve a good meal. Don’t you agree? CINNAMOn Yeah! Our animal friends have done nothing wrong! ANNAGRET Ugh, what a mor…more poignant phrase than I have ever heard. You inspire me to feed these furry creatures. If Annagret wanted to feed me, then let me starve; The Snowbunny launched Susan over the ropes into the first pile of dog feed. Next, Stacy soared into the second bin, landing even harder than Susan. Stacy’s body collapsed the container and caused food to scatter about ringside. ANNAGRET Bwhahahaa! Guess that one didn’t need much feeding! Save some for Zelda, Miss DORK! Bwhahahah! After naturally making Buzzllefoxxer V hold the ropes open for her, Annagret left with the ring beaming pride and satisfaction. Quite easy to do when your foes are agonizing in pet food! RENEE Maybe it’s my fault. Was I wrong for expecting decency out of Annagret? Was I an idiot? ALIX You are a huge idiot! Holy crap, one of the biggest idiots I have met. Like, for reals, there’s no bigger idiot alive than you. Your parents will probably be talked about in your town because they raised an idiot like you. RENEE Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 1, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2022 Backstage in an empty locker room we see…. LEBRENDA JAMES readying herself for Hard On Hoes title match. By doing crossovers with a basketball? Alas,the basketball is swiped out her hands by…. ETTA KITT LEBRENDA Cracker, I ain’t got time for games. ETTA Then you need to stop playing them and take your Hard On Hoes title match seriously. Are you aware of how long I had to work to get my title match against Princess Jasmine in SMUSH? LEBRENDA I don’t care about some ching chong, chop suey adventures. I care about now. ETTA I question that. Because you haven’t learned no woman is an island. Everyone needs somebody. Ladybird is obviously unreliable. And if you can’t rely on your only ally, you can not rely on yourself. LEBRENDA I don’t need some life lessons from you. I can put in for my squad! ETTA As can I. I propose we partner. Just for tonight. Even though we are polar opposite I will assist you in your Hard On Hoes match against that….that….vulgar child. I will do so as long as you promise to grant me a title bout at Anglemania 20. LEBRENDA But, Krista? ETTA I will have my title match at Anglemania. Krista will not stop me. LEBRENDA Alright, cracker, let’s make it happen. RENEE What does this mean for tonight’s matches, Alix? ALIX It means those two Daughters Of a Bitch are god damn Daughters of a Bitch! Damn them! Like they haven’t done anything else so it’s a preemptive damn it. Like when I'm sure my dealer is putting percs in my cocaine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 1, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2022 ***The Midnight Foxes (The Scarlet Bitch Ruby and Miss Perfect Caeldori Fox) Vs The Mega Hotties (The Lioness Sammi Cayley and The Little Hottie That Could Brea Brea) I don't know where the lights are taking us But something in the night is dangerous And nothing's holding back the two of us But, baby, this is getting serious Oh oh oh Dan-danger-dangerous Oh oh oh via RedGIFs RENEE I think they need no introduction. They are the totally mismatched pair of The Scarlet Witch Ruby and Miss Perfect Caeldori Fox. Actually, I’m not even sure how they got together. But they’ve been one of the winningest tag teams we’ve seen in Raw Is Whore. ALIX I know how they got together. Back when wrestling was conducted in smoky barns in hick towns in Alabama, Vince149 found two- RENEE Just stop. Please, just stop. Uh-oh, running out of breath, but I Oh, I, I got stamina Uh-oh, running now, I close my eyes Well, oh, I got stamina And uh-oh, I see another mountain to climb But I, I, I got stamina Uh-oh, I need another lover, be mine Cause I, I, I got stamina Don't give up, I won't give up Don't give up, no no no Don't give up, I won't give up Don't give up, no no no ALIX Listen to that ovation! One half of the Mega Hotties, the underdog who made good! The fans are on their feet and god damn it we’re gonna have a fight! RENEE I think it’s awesome how Brea Brea has befriended the Cayleys. To be honest they’re kind of hard to get close to. So major props to Brea. Years go, limit some once fast Swallowing the past Making something last I've seen you at your lowest of low Watching your demons grow Struggle you won't show Maybe I got plans for you And you take care of me My blood brother, fight for me ALIX And lemme tell you why we’re gonna have a fight! Because this is the fox den, damn it! The Midnight Foxes do not lose matches and they say there ain’t no such thing as the Mega Hotties because Miss Perfect and The Scarlet Witch are the MEGA HOTTIES! DING DING DING As Sammi limbered up, Ruby leaned over the ropes to offer a barrage of whispers to Cali. ALIX Wonder what Ruby’s saying. RENEE What she says out loud is bad enough. Her whispers must be ten times worse. Suddenly, Cali charged Sammi and Thez pressed her to the ground! ALIX Holy shitballs! To Sammi’s amazement and agony, Cali began smashing the back of The Lioness’ head into the canvas! RENNE Yikes! Sammi managed to shove Cali off; The Lioness breathed heavily just from the effort. Cali remained on the assault delivering a hot shot to Sammi! Our Welsh-born Hottie couldn’t even process the pain before Cali rained down forearms on her back! CALI You really think you’re better than me? Huh? Huh? You think you’re better than me bitch! RUBY MWHHAHAHHA! RENEE Why cast a curse when you can tell a lie? I doubt Sammi thinks she is better than Cali. Sammi fought back with punches, or swipes from Lioness's paws. Either way , Cali made herself Queen of this jungle as she used a Triple H’s style knee face crusher to rock Sammi! But, that wasn’t all; Cali then offered a show for Sammi and Sammi alone! Miss Perfect’s alluring beauty beamed directly into Sammi’s expressive eyes. RENEE They call her Miss Perfect for a reason! CALI Say it! Say I’m prettier than you! SAMMI Mmmm, you are the type of girl I’d meet in the hotel lounge, seduce you and perform deviant acts on you in front of my brother. But, dear, DO NOT ever compare yourself in any way to The Lioness! Sammi isn’t as aloof as we think! She provided the Deviants with some Christmas cheer and gave all us perverts a better present than Santa could ever! RENEE Christmas at the Cayley house must be an adventure! ALIX Crazy stuff, Ree Ree. I just assumed they were Illumanity Satanists. Cali must be jhiad seeking Muslin because she angrily ripped Sammi's Santa Hat off. CALI Who do you think you are?! SAMMI Someone who is prettier than you. Not to mention richer. Better educated as well. More popular, I have to believe. Cali couldn’t take it anymore and shoved Sammi into an empty corner. But much to Cali’s surprise Sammi came roaring back with Cruel Intentions 1! ALIX Ah! Someone call Selma Blair, the bitchy rich girl is on the loose! Titania dropped down for the pin count… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE ???? TITANIA OWWWW! Titania flopped onto her back, grimacing in agony. RUBY Is something wrong, puppy? It’s hard to be half fairy, half wolf. Half-Breeds have such a hard life MWAHHAHAHA! TITANIA What did you do to me? Sammi helped Titania to her feet. Or at least tried to. Instead, the Nerdly girl wobbled and slurred her words. Sadly, Cali remained unsympathetic and clobbered them both when she rocked Sammi with a dropkick to the back! RENEE Hey! Have some decency will you? ALIX Yeah! It’s Christmas! Both referee and Sammi suffered on the ground, clutching their back and whining in pain. Cali tags in Ruby with malice on their mind with the two down. The pair hook Sammi into their arms and delivered a double hip toss. ALIX Partner, The Midnight Foxes are tag team champions for a reason and it ain't because they spread their ass cheeks for Vince149 and Triple Patty. RENEE What a way to break the fourth wall. Ruby is such an evil bitch that she threw Sammi’s Santa Claus hat at Brea Brea! Even nice girl Brea Brea grew angry, pacing along the ring apron. RENEE The Grinch remake: starring Ruby! Ruby spent most of her time berating Titania….. RUBY Death, destruction, despair! That’s what a half breed like you deserves! MWHAHAHAAHAH! RENEE This is new type of prejudice. Ruby’s horrific attention turned back to Sammi, who endured a round of stomps from the ginger. The brunette then suffered kicks to the ribs while trapped in the corner. Yet, The Lioness managed to fight back with spirited forearms. ALIX Claw metaphors! Claw metaphors Yet, Sammi’s offense fell short as Ruby nailed her with a Hangman’s Elbow! RENEE Witch’s Brew! The cover…. ONE! TWO! Kickout! Ruby made a quick surge of offense, battering Sammi with elbows as she pulled her to her fight. Sammi was sent into the ropes and kicked in the back by Cali. But when Ruby surged forward for a sliding elbow, Sammi hit her with a basement dropikick! RENEE Incredible counter by Sammi! Yet, The Scarlet Witch rose upright, fuming and huffing. She launched a spin kick that Sammi slid underneath. The Lioness slid so well she connected with Brea for a tag! “YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” RENEE It’s The Little Hottie That Could! A cute 12 year old girl walked up to the ring to hand Brea Bea a box of chocolates as a gift. ALIX Kids these days, Renee, they respect their elders! RENEE I bet they do when their elders buy them a ticket to a pornographic wrestling show! Yet an ominous cloud hung in the air with the ginger witch observing the exchange with barred teeth. RUBY Won’t you share? BREA BREA Well, if it’s alright with my friend? The 12 year old gives a firm nod of approval. ALIX Brave kid, Renee, you love to see that in the youth of America. RENEE I’d guess she’s brave if she survives living with parents who bring her to Raw Is Whore. Brea Brea passed Ruby a chocolate truffle, the South African’s hands shaking with nerves. She expected the worse, with one fist clenched and her heart thumping. But Ruby merely enjoyed the taste of the chocolate. RUBY Delicious. Thank you. Now, The Little Hottie That Could could barely control the thrum of her racing heart. BREA BREA Huh, I don’t have to get slammed with a magic trick? RUBY Magic…tirck? ALIX Ruh-oh, Shaggy! RENEE If Zelda doesn’t like the word magic trick we kind of can guess how Ruby feels. RUBY I would be delighted to show you a….magick trick. A few soft Latin words seep from Ruby’s lip. Whatever they mean, they journey to Brea Brea. The words infected her very being and buckled her knees. RUBY Do you like my magic trick? BREA BREA What did you do to me? Ruby eruptsedwith a “MWAHAHAHAAH!” as she feeds Brea to Cali. However, Cali was posing for a fan who flew in from Japan just to see her…. via RedGIFs RUBY Cali! The Foxes collected tag titles for a reason; Cali somehow made a quick recovery and slammed her knee into Brea’s stomach. The blow hurt much more than it should with the South African stumbling backwards. RENEE We can’t keep allowing Ruby to freely cast curses in the middle of a match. ALIX I don’t get it, why not? RENEE Why not?! Why not?! I…I…what can I say? ALIX Hhehe, I won the argument. I’m smarter than Renee. Ruby twisted her thin body around to slam her hand into Brea’s chest with a discus chop! RENEE Malefic Aura! After a tag delicate enough to not ruin Cali’s manicure, The Foxes kept Brea in their coner. The two tag champs beat their foe to the ground with a parade of back elbows! RENEE If you think about it Caeldori and Ruby aren’t, well, they don’t match up very well personality-wise. Frankly, I’m not sure anyone matches up with Ruby. ALIX Ree Ree is being mean. Ruby has lots of good qualities! Today I saw her boiling newt for Pipi Bigguns so Didi would choke to death. That’s a real pal! Titania ordered the Foxes to quit their relentless assault. Instead, the devastating pair used their strength to turn an Irish Whip into a weapon and slam Brea’s back into the corner post! The beloved South African sunk to the ground, her face twisted by agony. ALIX What do you think the Foxes want for Christmas? RENEE Hmmm, well Caeldori’s bio on the website reads she likes “Rich men, five-star hotels, chauffeured cars, REAL fur coats and, herself.” Ruby’s bio says she likes “graveyards, cauldorns, blood sacrifice, dark miasma,-“ ALIX I love that place! Great yoga studio, awesome teachers, five stars on Yelp. Cali stomped away at Brea with her expensive boots. Yet price didn’t equal danger as Brea fought her way upright. The beloved Hottie struck at Cali with forearms that brought the brunette Hottie to her knees. There, Cali decided the best offense was no offense. Instead, she supplicated Brea Brea and turned her very life….and vagina…over to her! CALI Please, please, won’t you make me yours? ❤️ BREA I don’t know what to do…. CALI Can’t I be your Cali girl? Brea stood paralyzed at the offer of what most of us don’t even get near: Caeldori Fox’s fox hole! But Brea couldn’t bunny hop onto the fox hole as The Wicked Bitch of RIW slammed her face into the turnbuckle! BREA Uggh! I can’t see! Brea’s blindness led to her falling to Cali’s European uppercut! RENEE Cali Took Her Best Shot! As Brea groaned in pain, Cali made the cover… ONE! TWO! Shoulder up! The Wicked Bitch of RIW stepped into the ring, ignoring tag rules, and strutted around the ailing South African. TITANIA Ruby…. RUBY Don’t worry, halfbreed. I merely wish to conduct a fair contest. Shockingly, Ruby didn’t have Brea throwing up black sludge, or turning into a frog. Instead the English native struck the former Hard on Hoes champ with a zig zag! The move left Brea, clutching her head and begging for relief! RENEE A Draconic Hex cast on Brea! The cover… ONE! TWO! Again Brea klcked out! Ruby felt DA POWA~! The power that all gingers must fell, the power of redhead might! The Scarlet Witch waved on her quidkly fading foe… But much to Ruby’s surprise, Brea Brea summoned all her might and rammed the thinner Hottie directly into a neutral corner! RENEE There’s that trademark Brea Brea fight! And fight Brea did! The Little Hottie That Could rained down punch after punch as she used the second turnbuckle to tower above her foe! ALIX One, two, three, spread out the cape! One, two, three, twirl on the floor, one two three, left foot you swing! RENEE We’ve become Seasame Street. Ruby had no plans of seeing her delicate face scared. Instead she began to lift her foe for an atomic drop! But Brea reversed course, and shocked and hurt the unpreared Ruby with a DDT! ALIX Wrestling! Yes! Brea quickly scooted to her corner to tag in a stern faced Sammi! SAMMI Hear me roar! Ruby grunted in disgusted as she tagged an entering Sammi with a series of lefts. However, such febble punches took nothing to The Lioness; Sammi countered by hitting Ruby with a Sammi (stun) Gun! RENEE Although Sammi has never held a singles title we can safely say she’s one of our most talented performers. ALIX Is she better than Izzy? RENEE Out of respect for you I’m not going to comment. Ruby fell on the mat, coughing, wheezing, and plain suffering. This led to Sammi victimizing her with a Welsh Press! “YYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!” RENEE Here’s the cover! CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! Caeldori broke up the pin with a stomp! Unfortunately, Cali merely roused Sammi’s fury. SAMMI You’ve annoyed me for the final time, tramp. You believe you’re such a beauty? Let us see some proof of it! Sammi latched onto Cali’s fancy wrestling gear against the will of the former Hotties tag champ. Despite, Caeldori’s struggle or perhaps due to it, Sammi ripped down the top! “YYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” ALIX Yowzzzzzzzza wooozzzzzzzza! The embarrassment Caelidori felt was so palpable, so raw, so real that it was giftable… via GIPHY “FOXY LADY! FOXY LADY! FOXY LADY! Cali’s horror was not raw enough that it didn’t flip upon her hearing the crowd's chants. With the Deviants and their erect dicks rooting on her hot bod, Caeldori grew much more cheerful… via RedGIFs RENEE Looks like Caeldori has some new OnlyFans subs. Ruby, ever dour, yanked Sammi by the hair and threw her to the ground. Before, Sammi could rise The Wicked Btich of Raw Is Whore decked her with a dropkick to the face. Ruby’s British accent snapped at Cali to take up the fight. Though pouting, Cali dropped a fist onto Sammi’s face. TITANIA One of you has to get out the ring! Cali left, with a pout, but she still exited the ring. The hoots and hollers of the horny assholes quickly erased her classic look of sadness. Sammi was plenty sad for everyone as Ruby rocked her skull with a hangman’s elbow! “OOOOHHHHHHHH!” RENEE Ruby calls that one Witch’s Brew! Ever The Queen of the Jungle, Sammi returned upright; her vision blurred, and her gait was unsteady. Sadly all Sammi did was walk herself into the path of the most demented creature in wrestling… RUBY What’s a Lion to a Godddess?? Afflicted by Ruby’s curse, Sammi fell back into the ring ropes. The Lioness had every intention on moving, on fighting back. Yet, Ruby’s workings brooked her no free will. SAMMI Stop! RUBY So shy all of a sudden! You can’t play innocent with me! Surging forward, Ruby did the absolute unthinkable: the ginger dominated The Lionness! As befitting a kitty, Sammi endured Ruby’s grand ginger pussy directing into her model worthy looks… RENEE No! I can’t believe what I’m seeing! ALIX Ruby’s pussy hair may be red, her cunt may be pink, but her heart is black! Sammi could taste the wicked bitterness of Ruby’s dripping cunt juice. To all the shocked Deviants, Sammi appeared to be Ruby’s broken pet. So they watched, schlongs hard, as Sammi panted heavily, cunt juice dripping off her exiquste lips. RUBY I’m feeling a bit more merry than I’m used to….aren’t I? ALIX Yes! Yes! Please don’t curse me! Instead of cursing the fearful Alix, Ruby focused on domesticated Sammi. How? By breaking her with a wheelbarrow driver! RENEE Ruby has Sammi locked in for Vendetta! But when the ginger lifted the Welshwoman, Sammi deftly escaped what happened to be a loose grip. Furious, Ruby lunged for the Lioness only to endure a wild leaping lariat! “YYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!” ALIX Cruel Intentions One, right into the black heart, the soulless pit of Ruby! The Deviants were on their feet, their voices urged Sammi to undertake the journey to her corner. Brea, extended her hand, her face strained with strees! RENEE This is life and death! And somehow Sammi slapped hands with her South African teammate! ALIX The Little Hottie That Could from South Africa is ready! Damn you Apartheid! Damn you! MANDELLLLAAAA! Brea flung herself recklessly into the ring, taking down Ruby and nearly Titania with a crossbody block! Face as red as her hair, Ruby pushed Brea away. But Brea latched onto her like a parasite, flipping Ruby across the ring with a South African Arm Drag! “WE THINK SHE CAN! WE THINK SHE CAN! WE THINK SHE CAN!” Now, Brea trapped the English witch in the corner. Suddenly, Ruby looked a lot less menacing; Brea dominated her with The Little Axe Handles That Could! As Ruby sagged to the ground, Brea Brea knew it was time to celebrate! BREA BREA Sorry, girls, you can’t pull Christmas off like I can! “WE THINK WE CAN FUCK HER! WE THINK WE CAN FUCK HER! WE THINK WE CAN FUCK HER!” Unfortunately for Brea her show of lightskin drew the ire of the always jealous Caeldori Fox! Miss Perfect took down Brea with a sloppy spear worthy of any strip club in America! The punches were made for a catfight outside the club and left Brea Brea woozy and weak! RENEE Sometimes Miss Perfect is Miss Reliable. ALIX Holy contradictions Batman! Although The Foxex had the advantage, Miss Perfect’s vanity overwhelmed her will to fight. CALI Do you like my outfit? Or do you love my outfit?! via RedGIFs “PERFECT TITS! PERFECT TITS! PERFECT TITS!” CALI😃 RENEE Caeldori’s surgeon pumps his fist. The team's true leader, Ruby got Cali’s competitive juices flowing. Together they sent Brea into the ropes and drilled her with a double lariat upon her return. As Brea laid on the mat, prone and writhing in pain, The Foxes ascened to the second rope! ALIX Foxes don’t fly! Foxes don’t fly! They do if they’re thrown to the outside as Sammi did to poor Caeldori! SAMMI Do I love your outfit? In a JC Penny’s quaint type of way. Ruby finally lost her cool and threw her entire lithe body at Sammi! However, The Lioness caught the witch within her arms! SAMMI Now we’ll see who’s the true witch. Sammi turned Ruby out and struck her with the forever deadly Cruel Intentions 2! ALIX By gawd she knocked her so silly I won’t be surprised if she wakes up as Sabrina! Ruby’s misery continued; Brea twisted the Englishwoman around and devastated her with a hangman’s facebuster! “YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” RENEE Brea’s Breeze! The Mega Hotties made a DOUBLE COVER on Ruby! CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! WINNERS: THE MEGA HOTTIES, VIA PINFALL! But nothing ever went according to plan in Raw is Whore. The second Titnaia raised the victors hands was the second THE NASTY BOYDS clobbered the babes! NIKKI You forget about us, cousin? The Boyds had thing on their mind: tormenting Sammi. Thus Brea’s presence made an unwanted intrustion. The trailer trash sisters tossed the black babe out of the ring with unceremonious disregard! ALIX That’s a human being! That’s Sammi’s best friend! BRIT Do you know what we used to feast on for Christmas dinner? Starvation and loneliness. NIKKI Sometimes we didn’t have fucking lights on for Christmas! Did your father, our uncle, do anything to help, Sammi?! Did he, Samantha?!!! I’m asking you a question, bitch!!!! Brea tried her best to crawl into the ring, to help her bff. But THE MIDNIGHT FOXES thrawted her efforts, slamming the poor Hottie into the guardrail. That left Brea aching, back sore and head rattled. ALIX These Midnight Foxes are no good lousy daughters of a bitch! RENEE Hey, hey, hey! Sammi’s fate is far worse in the ring: her cousins prepare her for the deadliest double team since the 3D…. RENEE Not a Nasty Bomb! WHIRR! WHHIIRRRR! WHIRRRR! RENEE Wait? Wait?! ALIX It’s THE FREAKAZOIDS! AWWW HELLL YEAH! HOLLA IF YA HEAR THE DEVIANTS ROAR….THE SUMMER FREAKAZOID AND THE WINTER FREAKAOZID ARE READY FOR ACTION! ALIX It’s the three time OAOAST Women’s Tag Team Champions! December and Bobbi hit the ring, and suddenly the Nasties look a lot less sure of themselves. And with good reasons, as Big Poppa’s Girls launch haymakers that have them reeling! RENEE It’s looking like one of the Boyd’s prison riots back in Valdosta, Georgia! Like the prison riots, the guards need help! And they get help as Ruby and Cali hurriedly pull the sisters out of the ring! ALIX Get back in the ring, Boyds! There ain’t no anchor tied to your ass! Nikki is ready to fight, but she’s counseled to hold back by Brit and REFEREE WALLY NERDREGARD RENEE Oh, now he shows up when they’re twenty feet apart from any danger. RFN Listen, listen, listen! “SHUT THE FUCK UP! SHUT FUCK UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!” RFN No! I won’t shut up because I’m the star of Raw Is Whore! I’m the biggest name and I make the most money! And I’m the one everyone came to see! Sammi, I shit in your bag once and I’ll keep shitting on your bag, on your life, and on your career! Anglemania is coming up and that’s when I shine, daddy! And I’m gonna eat the whole catering spread and I’m gonna take a dump on Sammi, on Brea, on Bobbi, on December worthy of Anglemania 20, my night! My night! MYYYYY NIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT RENEE What a disgusting human being. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 2, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 2, 2022 e’re taken backstage to the catering area! The area is filled with declisious tacos and our great road agents Max Anderson and Snot serving them up! But our focus is on our ace reporter… ANNIE IDOL & HARD ON HOES CHAMPION MAYA DUNCAN BLANCHARD ANNIE Wow! Amazing! OAOAST Galaxy I am Annie Idol, rocking that Taco Bell sweater, and standing with OUR Hard On Hoes Champion, MAYA DUNCAN BLANCHARD! MAYA It’s your slutty side chick, Maya! ANNIE Maya, inquiring minds want to know, how will you achieve your number one goal of defending your Hard On Hoes Title against LeBrenda James? MAYA Oooh right! I should figure that stuff out. ANNIE There you have it, inquiring minds…that wasn’t an answer at all! Maya stares daggers at Annie! MAYA I blame you. When a Duncan has a dagger jump back as Annie does! Even if it’s a metaphorical dagger. ANNIE Me?! MAYA My number one goal isn’t defending the belt against Juwanna Man at Taco TNA Slamaversary. ANNIE Your mom isn’t going to be happy you mocked the show! MAYA Eh. Ya know, everyone is like “basketball this, basketball that womp, womp womp.” The chick I’m fighting got this job because she built a “BRONument” in her grandmother’s section eight housing. In the master bedroom, grannie James had to sleep on an air mattress in the hallway. ANNIE Wow! Amazing! In depth insight into the mind of- MAYA A complete dumbfuck! ANNIE😮 MAYA So, I heard bball players watch tons of hoops to get prepped. And I so did the same to get ready to rumble with LBJ the gender swap version. ANNIE Did you hear that, inquring minds? Our Hard on Hoes champ spent hours in the tape room going over Lebrenda’s matches! Maya puts on a sheepish, awkward crooked smirk. MAYA Uh, no. I watched He Got Game, and I watched Like Mike, the one with the black chick off Equalizer, and I watched Major League. ANNIE Isn’t that movie about baseball? I feel bad you wasted your time. MAYA I didn’t waste my time. Young Charlie Sheen is hot. Alix boned the older version. Not too sure she shoulda done that. But when in Calabasas do as the Calabasians do! But, Major League. Yes! I noticed the sexy owner wanted to ship the team out of Cleveland. Huh, huh, see where I’m going? So Cleveland has booted Lebron the trans version out of the Midwest. Fly over country? Fly LeBrenda’s ass over to LA! ANNIE Testify! MAYA And now LeBrenda has arrived in Los Angeles, California, the home of yours sluttily. Buuuuuuuut, the LA of my childhood is so far gone we can count on Ken Burns documentary about it. That’s the right old dude, right? ANNIE Possibly? MAYA Whoever he is I think he sent Alix dick pics! Well, whatevs, the glitz and glamor of my town is kinda just a little bit painted over by…Annie, will tell ya, I’m a chill girl who quarrels with none. ANNIE The violent crime rate in Los Angeles County increased 20% in 2021 over 2020. In 2021 there were over 100 reported deaths of homeless people. Skid Row has the highest concentration of sex offenders in the county, gang activity has increased in numerous cities and townships in LA County. MAYA Oh, Annie, I know that associates degree from Forest Park Community College was great, but that reporting was something else. Remember when Alysanne was supposed to be a news reporter for The All XFL Team, but she never actually reported anything? Yeah, you saying a syllable is better than Alysanne! ANNIE Thanks a million! MAYA My town used to be a place to live your dreams. Annie, can you finish my cliché line for me? ANNIE Now its where dreams come to die? MAYA Exactamundo, dude! LeBrenda, LAAAAA BRENDA, I’m like super sure you thought when you drove your Ford Focus across this great land you’d park it and leave my town on a private jet. Sucks to be you, LBJ post-gender ask me for my pronouns! Because now you’re just gonna have to hop on Spirit, someone is gonna be drunk on the flight and fighting the flight attendant, probably Alysanne because Alysanne sucks, they’ll charge you extra for your bags which pretty much ruins the whole “save money to fly to shitty cities in Florida” deal, you’ll have like three different stops so a four hour flight goes to seven hours, and you’ll miss your connecting flight and you have to wait forever at the gate because someone like Etta Kitt is bitching at the desk that her blanket wasn’t wool, and the whole thing will be super lame because it’s SPIRIT! ANNIE Inquring minds, we have found that Maya doesn’t like Spirit! MAYA And when you pull up to grannies crib you’re gonna have to figure out how to tell her why you get your nose bopped and your butt kicked by the white girl who fucks her family members on TV! Because my dreams never die! And LA is always LA wherever Maya goes and LA is fly and slutty as fuck! ANNIE And what about your rival Ladybird- MAYA Do you know what Ladybird’s pronouns are? ANNIE I can’t say that I do. But inquiring mind are very- MAYA Pronouns: I’m gonna bop your nose and put you through the announce desk and let Nerdregard poo on your wig! ANNIE What a scoop! Ladybird wears a wig! MAYA And Etta Kitt wears adult diapers and rubs against your leg when they’re dirty and she wants you to change them. ANNIE Is that true? MAYA Depends…on who you believe.Heheh, I’m getting clever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 2, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 2, 2022 RENEE We’re about to get to one of our biggest matches of the night, Etta Kitt squaring off against Jade Rodez-Duncan in one on one action. But let’s show a little love for our newest Referee, Konan! ALIX Yo-yoyo! I so love introducing the Latino ref on a show named after Tacos! RENEE If you’re okay with it then I guess I should be…. Etta Kitt entered to Obey by Bring Me The Horizon… Obey We hope you have a lovely dayObey You don't want us to come out and play Away, now now There's nothing to see here It's under control We're only gambling with your soulObey Whatever you do, just don't wake up and smell the corruption RENEE Etta Kitt made a bargain with LeBrenda James, this is pure watch my back and I’ll watch yours. All to get them both to the Hotties Anglemania mainevent. I believe Etta is a woman of her word. I don’t like her, but she’s a no nonsense- ALIX She’s full of a nonsense! Nothing but damn nonsense against Jade, damn nonsense against Raw Is Whore, and damn nonsense against every Deviant across the world! Jade entered to “Twerkulator” by City Girls! It's time for the twerkulator It's time for the twerkulator I'ma shake what my mama gave me I'ma shake my money-maker It's time for the twerkulator It's time for the twerkulator It's time for the twerkulator It's time for the twerkulator (ayy) ALIX Jade is standing up for the Deviants, she’s standing up for America, she’s standing up all of us, Renee, damn it! RENEE I don’t disagree with that. But, we have another thing to think about: are you trying to distract Jade with all these tacos. ALIX These are mine!! My tacos! Mine! Jade entered the ring with Etta ready for a brawl out of the school yard! But, as a Duncan, Jade had to show off the promo skillz… JADE Before we throw down like clowns, I just wanna reward the Deviants with some of my greatest hits. ETTA What exactly do you mean, girl? JADE I’m a woman, Etta. And this woman know it’s the time to be thankful. And I’m thankful for all the Deviants who love this big girl body. ETTA They should be ashamed, and so should you! JADE Ain’t no shame in this game baby! So let’s see just one of many times I rode it good and long! ETTA No! JADE Miss Patrica flew me out to Hawaii for a hot scene! Me and one of the Fluffers got lucky with Lawson Belle. ETTA It is meant to be Lawson and I. JADE Lawson’s not the nicest guy in the world…. but with a boner like that who cares about his personality? Deviants, I know you’re not fine with just that throwback, right? Lemme show what else you can get on and get off the Network… "CUM DUMPSTER! CUM DUMPSTER! CUM DUMPSTER!" JADE I don’t wanna be like I almost only fuck black guys….but I almost only fuck black guys. ETTA JADE Etta, Etta, Etta, why do you look so mad? Alix says with a booty like that you have to get a lot of black cock! ETTA You have said enough! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 2, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 2, 2022 Etta launched a lariat straight out of her Joshi days! But defly avoids the attack! Not only that Jade nails her legendary reverse x-factor! ALIX She got the attagonism from her mamma and got that move from her too! RENEE Etta had to know Jade always avoids lariats. And almost always makes her foe pay with the reverse x-facotr. Wisely, and I do mean wisely, Etta rolled out the ring. RENEE Now that’s brilliant wrestling by Etta. She has the most experience on the roster, and it shows. ALIX Right, Renee. Her ass expanded due to the experience from years of returning to the USA for black cock. RENEE That’s not what I meant! Jade hurried out the ring to grab an ailing Etta. But eyes shut with dismay, the Oklahoma native clung onto the ropes like Synth used to cling on to employment! “ETTA DOES ANAL! ETTA DOES ANAL! ETTA DOES ANAL! Etta wasn’t about to put up that! She rose to lecture the Deviants with the authority of a vice principal. Instead, Etta took a less than graceful Jade dropkick to the lower back that sent her crashing against the ring steps! RENEE It’s not too often a dropkick hits the lower back. ALIX Renee, it aint too often a girl too fat to jump tries one! Etta scrambled upward like a true fighter. Also like a true fighter, Etta suffered a right upper cut from Sowee! The joshi vet flew against the announce desk, unable to endure the blow. ALIX Those educated punches of Jade! One fist when ITT Teach and one went to Everest College RENNE Uh that’s not exactly a compliment. And coming from someone who went to UCLA it’s almost an insult. Dazed and confused like one of my favorite movies, Etta took a throw into the ring from Little Miss California. Trying to use her technical skills, Etta caught an entering Jade into a headlock. Tough luck for Etta: Jade sent her into her ropes and decked her with a lariat! JADE Mister Konan? KONAN Speak on this! RENEE We could run a show just using our refs. JADE Konan, you forgot to check me for weapons. A lot of people say I stuff the junk in my trunk. JADE What do you think, Ref? KONAN Jade’s filth, dirty, nasty! ALIX That’s the way we like it! ETTA No more! Etta ran for Jade, who swiped the former teacher around to run her into the turnbuckles. With the wind knocked out of her, Etta fell victim to Jade’s leaping double knees! ALIX This ain’t Japan! The cover…. ONE! TWO! Shoulder up! Jade pointd to the top rope to work up the crowd. Though they didn’t exactly care about the wrestling, they still cheered Jade’s ascent. Sadly, when Jade went for the crossbody, Etta desperately moved out the way! This caused Jade to land stomach first on the mat! ALIX There’s a lot of padding there on The Cum Dumpster so I don’t know if that really hurt her. It hurt The Cum Dumpster enough for Etta to seize her into an abdominal stretch! RENEE Great thinking by Miss Kitt! ALIX Miss Kit? Renne has a teacher fetish! Etta stretched Jade as much as the teacher’s weary body allowed. The camera man zoomed in Jade’s pained face for those who like that sort of thing. Well to be honest a hot chick suffering at the hands of another hot chick is pretty…hot! Let’s take a look… “SHE’S A PAIN SLUT! SHE’S A PAIIN SLUT! SHE’S A PAIN SLUT!” ALIX Hehhe, that’s how she looks when Krista holds the Taco Bell bag over her head and makes Jade jump for it. RENEE Way to work in the tacos. ALIX I’ve eaten 12 already! Luckily for Jade, Etta’s injuries caught up with her, and Jade made a big hip toss! With Etta prone and weak, The Cum Dumpster bounced off the cables. But to everyone’s surprise, Etta caught her with a drop toe hold! From there, The Okaloma native instantly seized Jade by the waist for a body lock! ETTA Disgusting fatty! Nasty blob! ALIX She sounds like Krista after 15 beers. RENEE Mother of the….she drinks 15?! “FAT GIRL MAGIC! FAT GIRL MAGIC! FAT GIRL MAGIC!” the crowd sang. ETTA SILENCE! Body positivity stirred our girl and she used a surge of might to turn Etta over into a pin! Konan dropped down for the count! ONE! TWO! THREE! No Etta kicked out! ALIX All that blubber, all that flab, all that belly, all that- RENEE I think we got it! Etta was forced to let go of the bodylock just to free herself from the layer of all that, well you get the point. Both blonds rose to their feet with Jade lashing Etta with a left jab, a right jab! Then a big boot? First, Jade was too fat to get her leg up high, and second Etta caught Jade’s leg and twisted it with a dragon screw! RENEE We are learning Etta can counter everything! Back to her tummy assault, Etta dropped a pointed elbow on Jade’s stomach! Then a pin…. ONE! TWO! ALIX When you’re that fat, that chunky, that wide- RENEE Just make your point! ALIX You exert a lot of energy with movement. That’s why Jade always tires out when Maya and I play keep away with the hot Cheetos. You know she likes them because black people like them. RENEE Good lord! Etta forced her heavy breathing foe into the corner and watched with twinkling eyes as Jade sagged against the posts. ETTA You pathetic, disgusting slob! I hate you! Etta exercised her hatred with four shoulder strikes to the stomach. Once Jade stumbled out the corner, Etta delivered a powerful stomach crusher. Poor Jade wailed in pain, which once again if you’re into that sort of thing, is hot! Maybe to your liking??? Yes? No? Sexy bitches making each other suffer for our enjoyment? Or you might like Etta dropping the big senton upon Jade! A cover… ONE! TWO! Jade labored but she got the shoulder up! “ETTA LIKES BLACK DICK! ETTA LIKES BLACK DICK! ETTA LIKES BLACK!” ETTA Shut up! Shut up! I hate every one of you! ALIX Daaaayum, I didn’t know this chick could come unglued like that. I so bet she was like that when that 14 year old boy she was fucking got stooged on to the principal by his girlfriend RENEE Can you sue your own employer for slander? We’re about to find out. ALIX And the boy was black! Etta tossed Jade into the ropes, where Jade made the wise move to hook onto them. The Oklahoma teach scowled and surged at Jade only to take a Konan style rolling elbow! KONAN Odelay! ALIX I’m like ultra surprised Jade can roll. Oh, oh, oh! It’s because Krista turned on the animal planet and said if the hippos can roll around in the mud, so can you. A 14 year old boy in AVON BARKSDALE cosplay shouted… AVON(?) Yo, bitch, pop that pussy for a real nigga! JADE Ummm, how old are you? AVON(?) American Pimpin, ho, let’s show those third world fucks how it’s done! JADE I love America! USA, let’s show em we got the best white girls…. “USA! USA! USA!” Our crowd sung as Jade showed the world how USA’s white girls worked that coochie! ALIX USA All The Way! Stay in your own country, jerks! RENEE So much was wrong with that statement. The crowd just sees one pussy but poor Etta lost her mind…. Inser booty scrowl! The teacher lunged at Jade, hitting her with a forearm into the small of the back! Jade stumbled forward leading Etta to devastate her with a reversed Schoolyard (sidewalk) Slam! RENEE Instead of dropping Jade on her back this version put her on her that hurt stomach. ETTA I am your teacher! And, Jade, I am your queen! AVON(?) The crown must not be worth much if the nigga that’s wearing it keeps losing it. ALIX Wowie wow, wow! This kid is kicking knowledge, Renee! When I was 14 I was snorting my first line coke/ As for Jade: we watched a true American hero! The Cum Dumpster bounced upright like a girl fresh outta LA County lockup. Better yet she fired herself up Duncan style….by smacking her giant sweater meat! ALIX By god, Renee, she is channeling the spirit of every serviceman, every working-class person trying to put food on their table, every single American, damn it! “AMERICA NUMBER ONE! AMERICA NUMBER ONE! AMERICA NUMBER ONE!” ALIX Yeah! Fuck Tanto, fuck Geronimo, fuck all them ho! RENEE Just because it rhymes doesn’t mean you should say it. Jade leaped at and leaped poorly at an annoyed Etta. Little Miss Cali wanted a hurricanrana, instead, Etta was the one who took respnisblity to get Jade onto her shoulders. RENEE Another great counter by Etta! ALIX Renne, that woman’s got Jade where the good lord SLIT her! For once, we had an accurate comment out of Alix: Jade’s Jadeymuffin smothered Etta’s face. Etta=Enemy? All seemed forgiven due to the teacher’s inadvertent round of clam munching! ETTA MMAMAMF!! ALIX If Etta can’t enjoy Jade’s piggy pussy then she’s a no-good son of a bitch! Oh, how this pleased the crowd! Many members grabbed the nearest Fluffer and demanded she takes penis in hand and jerk away! JADE Oh, Etta! HOLEE-SHIT! OINK! OINK! OINK! ETTAM MFMFHFF! Fluffers continued to their duty, as the Deviants made certain the young ladies thoroughly massaged their schlongs! ALIX If Etta can’t appreciate the pussy that Krista popped out her pussy and that Krista finger fucks to sleep every night…then Etta is a bastard, Renee! A bastard! RENEE Okay, okay! ALIX And you’re a bigger bastard! RENEE Hey! Once stroking in pleasure, the audience seethed in rage as LEBRENDA JAMES arrived with basketball in tow! Then, the fans watched in horror as LeBrenda threw her basketball into the small of Jade’s back! ALIX Damn her! Damn her very soul to hell! Jade went slack and tumbled to the ground, landing like a pig falling into slop! Left upright, Etta Kitt took in the forced lesbian experience, which uhhhh left her in an interesting state… RENEE Uh….what do I say to that?! ALIX Tell em the truth, Renee! Etta, couldn’t beat Jade, she’ll never beat Jade! And she’s gonna find out how money works around ‘cause Krista is gonna say “well, you know, we don’t have the money right now. We’ll give you double on the next shot,” and if Etta doesn’t enjoy being soaked in white trash pussy juice she can burn in hell! RENEE Yup, that’s something to say. I don’t know why you needed to say the middle part/ Words could not describe the horror laid bare upon Etta’s face. Nor the pussy juice! With rage motivating her every move, Kitt stuffed Jade between her legs. And, not in that way! ETTA No more of this garbage! But, instead of hitting her Pedigree, Etta soared through the air thanks to Jade’s back body drop! Lucky for Etta a certain LeBrenda James broke her fall. RENEE I don’t think that was part of their deal. Etta writhed in pain, though managed to escape to the safety of the ring apron. Safe only because the left behind LeBrenda endured Jade’s round of brutish stomps. “JORDAN’S BETTER! JORDAN’S BETTER! JORDAN’S BETTER!” That did it! Don’t talk that shit to LeBrenda! The Akron native rose upright to attempt to hammer Sowee! Attempt was the right word as Jade ran through her like she runs through Thanksgiving dinner! ALIX Boar! Boar! Boar! LeBrenda hollered out in agony, though not enough to appease Jade. The Cum Dumpster sent The Great Black Hope into the ropes and drilled her with a lariat on the rebound! RENEE Maya might have the night off. ALIX Oh noesy! When Maya or Krista have the night off they get like blackout drunk. Like so bad I feel bad for letting the cleaning staff bang them! LeBrenda wanted an escape, to take her talents out of this ring! But Jade yanked her by her Nike’s and stashed her into the setup for her Reverse X-Factor finisher! And with no escape possible LeBrenda endured the legendary move! RENEE She Got It From Her Mama! ALIX And this year Krista even let Jade shoot her own turkey. Which was a rooster. Was Terry Taylor. No time to celebrate LeBrend’a defeat, though! Etta Kitt returned to the ring and seized hold of Jade in a standing head scissors! ALIX Super oh nosey! Etta Kitt delivered a Pedigree to end all Pedigrees! ALIX Damn it! Damn that son of a bitch! The cover… ONE! TWO! THREEE!!!!!! Winner: Etta Kitt, via pinfall For once in her time here, Etta smiled…. ALIX Damn her! Damn that son of a bitch! You no good, lousy son of a bitch! RENEE I get your anger. But, has Etta Kitt punched her ticket to the Hotties Anglemania 20 mainevent? ALIX She’s punched her ticket straight to hell, the son of a bitch! Damn her! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 5, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2022 Well, back in the parking lot…Dreamy continues to swim in the ever increasing in deep end! As time passes her doom nears…a cage match with Krista! HINA Mitama, Mitama, Dreamy continues to shame both herself and her family line. MITAMA Sister, sister, I am revolted to be in her presence. DREAMY Then leave! Go away! As usual, Dreamy finds support in Kathy Karen Kelly who arrives with a milkshake. KKK Dreamster, are you ready to whup Krista’s ass? DREAMY Not so loud! KKK Calm down, calm down. You are gonna smoke her like The Warriors are gonna smoke The Lakers in the playoffs! “BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!” KKK You want some of my milkshake? It’s gingerbread. DREAMY No, no, no! I don’t want any milkshake! I want my girls to pull up! Dreamy’s mood rises to a heady high as a limousine arrives DREAMY Indeed there’s Christmas joy as two giant Christmas globes arrive…belonging to the boobilicious… via Gfycat OVARY CHAMPION… CHARLI 9INE CHARLI 9INE MMmm!I look good! Where all my rich Santas? DREAMY I know what you’re trying to do! And you’re not gonna bring me down! Scram, chump! No one wants to see you! CHARLI 9INE I’ve been a bit absent, but only because I’ve been working on Toni Patrica’s Charli Tours The Orient! All the cute guys in the world can be sure to look forward to it! DREAMY No one is gonna look forward to it, skeezebag! I’ve got real Hotties coming and- Dreamy said the wrong thing as Charli sweeps her off her feet and slams her into the limo! DREAMY Owie ow ow ow! CHARLI 9INE Shut up before I make you shut up! Ugh, no one is supposed to see a petite angel like me kicking your butt! Angry at herself for losing her cool, Charli hurriedly exits the scene of her crime. MITAMA It is a shame Charli did not shove Dreamy into the trunk and send the car away. HINA Very true. DREAMY Shut up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 5, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2022 ***THE NERDREGARD SISTERS (Pierette and Adelphe) Vs????*** Pierette entered to Dead Girl by AU/RA Friend of mine is a black suitcase and a frowny face Had a life and now my eyes are glazed, 'cause they dug my grave All I wanna do is shake my headShake my head, shake my head But how am I gonna do that with a broken neck? A broken neck, guess I ain't like them (Guess I ain't like them)I'm just a dead girl, don't live in your world I just roll my eyes back every time I hear that Ooh-ooh-ooh, here we go again Ooh-ooh-ooh, I'm about to lose a friend I'm just a dead girl, ain't even mad though I just roll my eyes back every time I hear that Ooh-ooh-ooh, I'm just a dead girl Ooh-ooh-ooh, d-d-dead girl RENEE The return of Pierette Nerdregard has been absolutely everything we thought it would be! ALIX And not what her psychiatric team thought when they gave her the day pass. But you know something, brothers? Pierette is a lot like a mall Santa’s penis. Once it’s out, it is out! RENEE I can’t believe you. Adelphe entered to Shadow by Vicetone and Allie X Just follow my shadow, baby Hold on to my hand, I know you wanna Just follow my shadow into the night OohJust follow my shadow, baby Let go of the past, you know you wanna Just follow my shadow, baby, tonight RENEE Adelphe was the first line of defense against this assemblage of second-generation starlets. When Dreamy dropped the gauntlet Adelphe picked it up! ALIX Adelphe is a lot like my Uncle Jose. You drop your kids at school and he- RENEE No! LILLIAN And introducing their opponents… I stay out too late Got nothing in my brain That's what people say, mmm-mmm That's what people say, mmm-mmm I go on to many dates [chuckle] But I can't make 'em stay At least that's what people say, mmm-mmm That's what people say, mmm-mmm ALIX My gawd! Could it be? Could Krista Isadora Duncan be Dreamy’s mystery opponent? Could she be the third woman?! Who’s side is she on? RENEE You know exactly who’s side she is on, you spend nearly 24 hours a day with her! ALIX A lot of time she leads me into the basement with a trail of coins and locks me in. Krista actually appeared in a red robe with a microphone in hand KRISTA Seasons Greetings, Toy Box! “KRISTA HAVE MY BABY!” A fan in a Tony Brannaigan “HELLLOO WOOORLLD!” shouted. KRISTA Only if you burn that shirt. Anyway, it’s the Holidays, and I know that’s a rough time for a lot of you. And my heart aches for you, it really does. Having to open presents, watching Christmas movies, spending time with your family! Silver, Godell, schedule more games! ALIX I like spending time with my family. I get to sit on my uncle’s lap, and my grandpa’s lap, and my cousin’s lap, and the postman’s app, and my dad’s ex prison buddy who’s just staying with my mom for a little bit’s lap. KRISTA I always say come to me if you need anything, and you Deviants need a lot of things. I mean a lot. And how kind of me to extend an offer for help and actually follow through. Ah, maturity! Yes, I have a little Christmas presents and New Years Greetings for all my darlings in the Toy Box. ALIX Dig-dig-diggity dog! She gives the best presents! One time she got Terry a large trash bag, a zip tie and a shovel! Such a great way to get up leafs RENEE Leafs, eh? The Nerdregards applaud Krista’s giving nature. Well, Adelphe does, Pierette just kind of dances around like a girl who flunked out of clown college. Let’s just say she’s happy it’s the New Year and leave it at that SMH. KRISTA I know just what mama’s special boys want for Christmas! “Mama” strutted to the announce desk where her wife drooled all over her bib. Yes, they gave Alix a bib. Taco’s are messy! Especially those New Year Day chili and GHB tacos Pete-O’s cooked up! KRISTA And it’s not to lower the age of consent laws! Krista stepped onto the table, shockingly careful not to kick off Alix’s tacos. RENEE She spared your tacos. ALIX Marriage counseling works! KRISTA Ready for mama’s cooking, boys? “YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” KRISTA Alrighty then! “WE’RE NOT WORTHY! WE’RE NOT WORTHY! WE’RE NOT WORTHY!” ALIX I am because I got a ring from her, suckers! PIERETTE Hmmm I prefer cute boys! Let’s get Ignatius bent over and I’ll whip his butt with candy canes! Kyahahhaah! RENEE Let your sleigh bells free, Deviants! KRISTA Something isn’t right. And I don’t mean the stench of Skid Row our crackhead, security crew drags in. Toni Patrica trusts me to put on the best show possible, and you should as well. Sure sometimes I may throw Jobette Burr out there to get the crap kicked outta her by Annagret, but most of the time I put effort into my job. But, if you notice I give the girls a lot of leeway to do their thing. RENEE Every GM in OAOAST history has their own style. ALIX Yup, Lisa Ann is more kind of give and take during sex, Krista likes her dirty talk, Abe Vigoda…man, what a freak! KRISTA And so I trusted Dreamy to deliver me not one but TWO second-generation GODDESS to face Adelphe and Pierette. KRISTA Gorgeous smile, honey. But as for your opponent or what we in the streets call the opps...I knew I shouldn’t have gotten my hopes up, and gosh it won’t be fun to throw Dreamy around a cage. But….actually, it’ll be a lot of fun. Come on out, Dream! RENEE I sort of feel bad for Dreamy. But I’m also gonna laugh at her. Sans entrance music, Dreamy sulks through parted entrance doors. DREAMY Wait just a damn minute! KRISTA I’ve been wating for weeks. DREAMY I’m a winner, damn it! RENEE She’s not gonna win against Krista in a cage. She’s toast! ALIX With cinnamon and butter! DREAMY I shouldn’t be punished for my girls no showing. It’s not my fault! KRISTA You shouldn’t be held to the promises you made. You’ll make a great politician. But it’s hard to govern when you’re being fed out of a draw thanks to pissing off your alcoholic boss. I’ll miss you, Dreamster, you sure were a cutie. DREAMY I quit, I quit! I quit! Gimmie the resignation papers. Right now! KRISTA Resignation papers? What the fuck is this? House of Cards? West Wing? DREAMY I quit! I’m finished! Done! Finito! JE SUIS FINIS! I’M- Jenny died of suicideWith a candle burnin' in her eyeBut on my tombstone when I goJust put "Death by Rock and Roll" Krista turns a dark, sharp eyebrowed glare towards "Dreamster" DREAMY Dreamy need not worried as THIS HOTTIE APPEARED.... KRISTA ALIX I know who that is! I know who that is! DREAMY Yes! Yes! Yes! I told you! I told you! I told you! In a city full of posers, phonies, and wannabees, there finally emerges a woman who has come to set the record straight! So all you losers better put your hands together for the daughter of CANDIE, and the daughter of “THE FRANCHSIE” ZACK MALIU! Here to make you MMMMMMMMMMM I, DREAMY, give you, “THE PRODIGY” JENNA MALIBU!!!!!!!! “HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!” RENEE Holy shoot! Dreamy delivered! Adelphe backed up a bit in the cage with Pierette standing tall to protect baby sister. ALIX Jeanna Malibu, Renne, she’s not like you Renee, she was never last picked in sports! RENEE That doesn’t matter! What does matter is that her father, Zack Malibu, was synonymous with the OAOAST for almost a decade. It’s fair to say that Zack was this company’s Bret Hart. ALIX Totally! Then Krista tossed him out like Uncle Phil did Jazz and took over. But for that time where I anchored Krista down in a tag team and wasted her money-making potential and forced her to feud with guys like Synth and Bosley and Rico, during that time Zack Malibu was the OAOAST’s everything. DREAMY I’m not done yet, losers! You never should never have doubted me, chumps! Jenny died of suicideWith a candle burnin' in her eyeBut on my tombstone when I goJust put "Death by Rock and Roll" DREAMY You chumps really aren’t worthy! But I’m delivering it anyway! She is an AMERICAN HEROINE! A gold medalist in the cutthroat sport of Equestian Dressage! When she’s not riding horses, she’s riding the man you hose beasts can’t satisfy! You say all she does run horses across a track, but you better hope she never runs across your man! She is my good friend, maybe my bestie, she is “THEE STALLION” ANGLESLUT!!!!! CROWD Even Krista must stand in awe, though her’s is shown by gulping down a shot of Jack It’s not a good sign when the person in charge turns to alcohol over personnel decisions. And with Dreamy's smug smile like nothing was ever amiss... That should only make Krista drink more! RENEE What even is this? KRISTA Hey, I don’t pay you ask questions in millennial cliches! RENEE Ok, ok, ok! But what I’m asking is- Renee goes from an angry drunk in Krista to an annoying whatever she is in Dreamy! DREAMY Mic check, mic check, is this thing on? It’s always on when The American Wet Dream is on! Hahahaah! You gotta love it, Alix, I’m returning the OAOAST to its roots. No more goofy second rate Nerdly cousins. I’m giving you The Prodigy, and Thee Stallion! Jenna Malibu and AngleSlut! ALIX I always liked Anglesault! It’s rare to find someone who burns so many bridges that he has to create his own federation and for it to not turn into TNA. DREAMY Haahah, exactly, Alix! And everything my dad did, Jenna’s dad did, Angie’s dad did, and Tabby’s parents did, we’re gonna do 100,000 grand, understand? RENEE I’m not December, I’m not going to be impressed by rhyming. I want to know who Tabitha’s parent is. ALIX 100,00 Grand, understand! It rhymed, Renee! I have to tell December! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 5, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2022 DING DING DING RENEE There is the bell!! Nerdly family versus Malibu and uhhh is the last name Sault? DREAMY Listened to what you said? Nerdly family versus legends! A brawl started the contest in a spirited way! The Hotties duked it out like heavyweights instead of tiny divas. Suited to combat, Jenna and AS wore down the ginger sisters. That victory led Jeanna chucking Adelphe shoulder first into Pierette’s knee! “OOOOHHHHHHHH!” JENNA You ain’t seen nothing yet! The busty Rhode Island native showed us something we’d never forget; she lashed Adelphe with a springboard flipping lariat! “OOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!” DREAMY That’s called JENNA MALIBU OVERDRIVE! Get it through your misshapen Canadian head! ALIX She’s talking to you, Rneee. RENEE I know. Jenna pined Pierette into one corner, while AngleSlut held Adelphe in the other. After they wore the gingers with chops, the pair sent them careening into each other with an Irish whip! Pained and weak, the Quebec raised sisters toppled to the mat. DREAMY Look at those inferior Canadian genetics. They’re the cheap version of Nerdlys and they’re the cheap version of North Americans. Just like you! ALIX She’s still talking to you, Renee. RENEE I know! The sisters lend each other support in their valiant fight. Together our ginger heroines rise throwing forearms! “NEREDREGARD! NERDREGARD! NERDREGARD!” DREAMY Alysanne was spot on. . Why? Because she said these Deviants are just deviants because they’re dumb! They’re chanting Nerdregard, must be idiots! Adelphe forced Angleslut against the cage, with each babe trying to use it as a weapon. Meanwhile, Jeanna wore the crazed Piettte to the ground. Anguished, Pierette found herself unable to stop Jeanna from tightening her into a body lock! Speaking of tight, your pants might feel a little tight around the groin at the sight of Jenna’s hold… But! Pierette summoned the strength of every ginger in the world to pry away Jenna’s beautiful, gorgeous, perfect legs. They looked less perfect once Pierette threw Jenna down with a dragon screw! RENEE Pierrette with an excellent counter! ALIX Just cause you eat lead don’t mean you can’t wrestle, folks. Me and Pierette are proof! Pierrette took the fight to Angleslut, walloping her with overhand rights. But when the zany Hottie came off the ropes, Anglesault’s daughter sent her into the cage with an overhead belly to belly suplex! “OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!” ALIX My god that was some serious ass impact! “FUCK YOU, ANGLESLUT, AND FUCK YOUR FATHER!” A 54 year old war vet in a DEADLY ALLIANCE shirt shouted. “ANGLE-PLEX IS THE BEST!” ANGLESLUT Oh, riiiiight. Deadly Alliance? How’s it go again? What’s their signal… I dunno if it looked that good? That GOLD MEADLIST good? DREAMY Hahhaha! You thought my dad and Reject set the standard for stables? Or was it Zack and Calvin? Did you think it was Moneymaker and Wright? Nope, Renee, it was Dreamy! It was Dreamy all along! RENEE You’re trying to say you’re the leader? DREAMY Uhhh, well, uhhh, it’s like, uhhh, I’m…uh just uhhh… RENEE Dreamy, are you ever going to tell us who Tabitha’s dad is? DREAMY Renee, I know you love scoops, and I got a scoop for you! RENEE Tell us! Tell us! DREAMY You’re an idiot! Bwhhahaha! Adelphe fought against the combined might of the second gen girls. But with the strength of their dads, AS and Jenna hammered the Nerdlys’ cousin into the corner. Yet when AS sent her out with a monkey flip Adelphe landed on her feet! ADELPHE Tada! The Celestial Cum Craver lands like a butterfly through the winds! Jenna tried to clip this butterflies wings with a lariat! But Adelphe took her down with a crossbody block known as a LEAP OF FAITH! “WE LOVE GINGERS! WE LOVE GINGERS! WE LOVE GINGERS!” RENEE If America runs on Dunkin then Raw Is Whore runs on gingers! ALIX And cocaine. Lots and lots of cocaine! Adelphe had the energy of a coke head as she ran down both The Stallion and The Franchsiette with leaping knee strikes! Both girls go down to big cheers from the standing Deviants. And more cheers rocked The Box, thanks to Pierette returning to drop a big elbow on Jenna RENEE AngleSault is a two time world champion and he has held titles that existed only when he held them. Zack Malbiu? The name speaks for itself, everybody. And- DREAMY Don’t forget my dad! Sandman9000, who produced…Dreamy, Dreamy, at last she has arrived! ALIX And Tabby! Folks, sometimes it’s ok to leave your teenage daughter with their pillhead, freebassing uncle. Especially if that uncle is Northstar! RENEE You really shouldn’t use this as a forum to slander your ex-fiance. Jenna tried to fight her way upright, swinging wildly at the ginger sisters. But, Pierette caught a hold of her legs to trip her up. Enfeebled, Jenna’s next trip came courtesy of Pierette’s slingshot into the cage! Little sis took over from there: Again and again, Adelphe pounded her rival’s face into the steel mesh! PIERETTE The music is sooooo cooool! RENEE Music? Apparently, Jenna’s face smashing into the cage created a jolly tune for her to dance too…. And for us to stroke to! “WE LOVE GINGERS! WE LOVE GINGERS! WE LOVE GINGERS!” ADELPHE Let the crimson streaks draw blood from our foes! Yeah, what she said. Anyway, Pierette got the point and joined Adelphe in attempting a double suplex on Angleslut. An attempt is where it ended; AS easily escaped the hold. Within seconds Adelphe violently twirled to the mat thanks to an… ALIX AngleSlam! Angleslam! Alix could scarcely finishing spazzing out before the world had to react to AngleSlut’s massive Angleslam on Pierette! Both sisters lay in a heap of red hair and anguished groans. RENEE Wow! Just like that the tide has turned and washed over the pride of Quebec! AngleSult treated the sisters like the NHL treats Quebec: as if they didn’t matter! Instead the Pittsburgh native turned her attention to a mousy looking 30 year old woman in the front row. ANGLESULT Hey you, got your cute little NERDLY FAMILY PROPERTY shirt on? I’ve never seen that shirt. Lemme get a closer look at it. Suddenyl sweating, the woman shook her head. ANGLESLUT Come on, come on, come on, baby! While most Deviants would sell their own mother to the devil for such an invite, the mousy woman’s nerves hit like a truck. ANGLESAULT I wasn’t asking, sweetie. With no choice but to meet the daughter of an icon, the woman allows security to help over the guardrail. RENEE Dreamy, what’s going on? Hey! Dreamy what are you doing! Security serves as no protection from The American Wet Dream who bumrushed the Nerdly fan! As the Deviants hissed, jeer and curse, the Oregon native chucks the dazed and hurt fan through the open cage door! ALIX Damn them! Damn their very souls straight to hell! RENEE I’m with you, Alix. A lot of things fly in Raw Is Whore. This shouldn’t be one of them. The woman pleaded for her life, for mercy, for anything but the doom AngleSlut held over. ANGLESLUT Boohoo! I didn’t win a Gold Medal for being merciful! AngeSlut proceeded to deliver the devastating, the lethal, the truly horrendous…garvin stomp! RENEE Dreamy is screaming at me to give everybody the correct name of the move. Which is… THE ANGLESLUT DERBY! The god medalist left the Nerdly fan, bruised crying and with a bloody lip! RENEE This is revolting. I don’t believe in censorship…but we need to cut away from this carnage. Lcukily for the fan and her health insurer, Adelphe returned to the fray with a…. ADELPHE LUMINARY UPPERCUT! “YYYEEAAAAAAAAAAA!” RENEE That uppercut was right on the money! ALIX Heck yeah! I bet Remy 50 bucks the Nerdregards would win. RENEE I can just imagine Steve Levy saying he bet on The Rams. Adelphe dove atop AS for the cover… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! NO! ANGLESLUT KICKED OUT! ALIX On my mama’s grave, I don’t know what demon possessed AngleSlut and got her shoulder up! RENEE Your mom isn’t dead, but I would believe a demon-possessed AngleSlut. Though sighing in frustration, Adelphe tangled Thee Stallion into the ropes for a round of punches. But, Dreamy finally proved her worth by clobbering Adelphe from behind! DREAMY Awww yeah, boy! Sandman certainly wouldn’t gloat over forearms, nor would he let a ginger rock him with the uppercut that left Dream drooling like an invalid. Fitting because the Luminary Uppercut turned her into an invalid. “LET’S GO ADELPHE! LET’S GO ADLEPHE! LET’S GO ADELPHE!” Adelphe used the crowd’s love and support as fuel to batter Angleslut with a wave of knife-edge chops. Thee Stallion countered the blows by shoving The Celistal Cum Craver into the corner. But AS wasn’t expecting the running snapmare utilized by Adelphe…utilized to neck crunching effect! RENEE Blazing Light! With the crowd cheering her name, the millions at home sitting on the edge of their basement sofas, Adelphe ascended to the top rope. ADELPHE I believe….I believe…I believe I can fly! Adelphe didn’t fly just yet. Instead she climbed to new heights. To heights such as the top of the cage! RENEE Adelphe, get down! Adeplhe, get down! ALIX The only way she’s getting down is if she flies down! ADELPHE May the Star Father shine his light upon me! Alas, the star father was no match for the founding father; his daughter ran up the ropes, to the top of the cage and greeted Adelphe with something of a smile… Then that founding father’s daughter flung Adelphe through the air, through the history of the OAOAST, back to Anglesault’s inauguration as champion. That trip owed thanks to a top of the cage ANGLE SLAM! ALIX How do you survive that?! How the hell do you survive that, Renee?! Damn it to hell these women are risking their lives and Krista is getting 9 million per year after taxes! RENEE You didn’t have to put her money matters out there, but you’re right. Can anyone survive taking and giving an AngleSlam off the steel cage! AngleSlut determined she could, crawling to the ropes for help in getting her upright. The hum of the crowd’s roar intoxicated the youthful brunette. Rather than attempt a pin, she painfully trekked to the top rope. RENEE What more can she possibly do? ALIX If ya ask me, and you so should, enough is enough. She slammed her in an Angle like fashion so pin her. If I’m dropping Remy on his head, I’m not hanging around to knee him in the testies! Yet, AS remained abuzz with the growing and passionate crowd noise. She blew a kiss to her dear old dad who was somewhere watching and sailed off the top with an ANGLESAULT! Sadly for her, it wasn’t the mat providing a landing. It was Pierette’s arm! PIERETTE Kyahahhaahah! You’re not a cute guy but you’ll do! Pierette spun AngleSlut out and delivered a nasty pile driver! “OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Apparently, AS’ groans of pain were akin to an Ed Shreean song for the now dancing Pierette… ALIX Don’t ask me what’s wrong with her, Terry is the one who hired her! Jenna returned to action, using the element of surprise to pitch Pierette in the cage! PIERTTE Kyahahahh! Fun, but I like it better when I do it! And thus Jenna’s beautiful face kissed the cage one, two, three, four, five times! PIERETTE Kyahhahaha, much more fun when I do it! Dreamy, ever the helpful one, came along and bashed Pierette in her redhead with a…pillow?! Not even a loaded pillow, just pillow. RENEE I think she’s taking her name too literally. But it did enough damage for The American Wet Dream and The Malibu Bad Girl to tighten the lunatic into a double front facelock. JENNA Back to the nut house, big red! PIERETTE Don’t call it a nut house! Defending her honor from stereotypes, Pierette turned the tables and wreaked havoc with a double Northern lights supelx! ALIX Look at the power! Look at it! That ‘s what happens when you get sent to institutions and they give you expiermental drugs. RENEE Stop making up things. A pin remained from the hold; Referee D’Lo counted… ONE! TWO! Dreamy didn’t kickout but Jenna did, which was good enough! Yet, Jeanna remained groggy, just as hurt as Dreamy. Thus the pair had no answer for Pierette’s ascent to the top rope. PIERTTE You only live once, but you can kill twice! Somehow that realization led the loony babe to climb to the top of the cage. Again the fans were on their feet, many telling Pierette to come down for safety. But since Pierette doesn’t even hold scissors safely that wasn’t happening. Instead, we all watched in awe and fear; Pierette sailed off the top of the cage and dropped an elbow on Dreamy and Jenna!” “HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! Alas, with so much attention on Pier’s flight no one noticed TABITHA’s arrival. Enjoying her rare moment of stealth, Tabitha pried the door of the cage! RENEE Wait, it’s Tabitha with the cage door! Wait…what does she have the cage door for?! What’s going on? D’LO I think you better recognize you can’t bring the door into the ring! TABITHA Oh really? I can’t? D’LO Yes! TABITHA Oh really? What are you going to do with my door and I, LoLo? D’LO Don’t make me kick your blond ass out on the street! That provoked the usually calm Tabby’s temper and she chucked the door at the greatest European Champion of all time! The door might have crippled the middle age grappler if it weren’t for Adelphe diving to save him! That left the steel door to collide with Adelphe’s head. Both redhead and black dude crumpled to the mat under the weight of the cage! ALIX Damn it, that man has a family! And Jingus’ daughter just crippled their breadwinner! RENEE With how strong Tabby is it wt wouldn’t surprise me if she was Jingus’ daughter. Tabitha looked rather pleased with the injuries inflicted. Pierette could not tolerate Tabitha’s arrogant posturing. Nor could the Deviants who called for punishment! Acting as judge Pierette levelled her verdict as she went COAST TO COAST on Tabby! Unfortunately, might made right; Tabby countered with a MAIN EVENT SPINE BUSTER! Worse still, The Babe dropped Pierette on the ginger’s already agonized cousin! ALIX When will it stop, damn it? When is enough enough? Not until Jenna got her lick in, driving the dominance home to Pierette with a fisherman’s buster! RENEE That is her dad’s Pop Drop! It has beaten Popick, Mister Dick, Leon Rodez even Anglesault himself! Speaking of our looming namesake, his daughter locked Pierette into the ANKLE LOCK! “BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!” Pierette was knocked out, left helpless and victimzed. The only reason she remained in the hold was because a laboring Clem Buzzlefoxxer took so long to hit the ring. Yet, once he got in he immediately called for the bell Winners: AngleSlut and Jenna Malibu, my referee decision. JENNA Raise the cage! Hurry up and raise the cage! I said raise it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 5, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2022 ALIX I think the dorks in the props department better do what she says! That they do as the cage rises to the ceiling. It hangs over the victors who all take different stances. Tabitha kicks back and relaxes, Dreamy gloats, AngleSlut preens like a pony and Jenna glares into the camera. JENNA Do you know who we are? “BBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOO!” JENNA Do you know who we are?! “YOU’RE SOME BITCHES! YOU’RE SOME BITCHES! YOU’RE SOME BITCHES!” JENNA Some bitches?! This is The American Wet Dream, the daughter of Sandman9000, Dreamy! This is the daughter of someone who breathed life into the corpse of the tag team division, The Babe Tabitha! I am the daughter of the Franchise, the REAL carrier of the Malibu legacy, Candie’s only daughter, THE PRODIGY Jeanna Malibu! And this is the daughter of the one each and everyone of you should bow down and worship. Believe me, your man already does. This is the gold meadalist…THEE STALLION AngleSlut! So let me ask again do you know who we are? “FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!” JENNA We are the A-W-O and we have come for what is rightfully ours! “BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!” RENNE The AWO?! They can’t be serious! JENNA You will give it to us like your man gives it to AngleSlut! ANGLESLUT Tough crowd! Majorly tough crowd. I’m sorry, I’m sorry I get a little choked up about what us second gen gals have to suffer through. Poor little Eponine Black and poor little Isabella Spezia have to support How2Girl and Euphoria. And Jade….I’m getting emotional…she has to schoolhouse it with a pudgy substitute teacher. I’m getting verklempt. RENEE She’s in the right town, because those acting skills need some work. ANGLESLUT So emotional right now. But, I, AnglesSlut, rose to prominence the day I was conceived, and then I rose high when I won that piece of jewelry for Equestrian Dressage. ALIX Talking about those gold medals folks. Our first gold medalist in our company! ANGLESLUT I need a moment, I’m getting emotional, please talk amongst yourself. RENEE Is she treating this like a joke? People are hurt because of her. ANGLESLUT Let’s go to the callers. RENEE The callers?! DREAMY Hahahah, right, chumpstains! Now is your time to get that AWO vibe in your life! 555-4444! I know OAOAST has the unwashed mong section of the wrestling fanbase, but you can remember that number. ANGLESLUT Call, we’ll talk, we’ll talk. It’ll be fun. Someone actually calls in! ALIX Oh! Hey! It comes through me! Hey there, you’re on Taco Duelsday! Merry Christmas, Happy New Years! CALLER I’d like to say that uh..uh…uh… DREAMY Next, next, next! ALIX We’re not playing calls here folks, yer either gonna get on or get off. I stay out too late Got nothing in my brain That's what people say, mmm-mmm That's what people say, mmm-mmm I go on to many dates [chuckle] But I can't make 'em stay At least that's what people say, mmm-mmm That's what people say, mmm-mmm “YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” The beloved GM, the mother figure and MILF figure returns to the scene, face darkened with disgust at what stands in the ring. KRISTA Caller, you’re on the air with Raw Is Whore, please state your name. Hi, my name is Krista, long time watcher, first time caller. DREAMY Krista! Great to see you, looking good, looking fly, looking on top of your game, your whole outfit is looking dope! KRISTA “Uh, so, uh, I just wanna say that if the rebels want any chance of winning this war, they better trust Benedict Arnold. Because when Benedict Arnold is Benedict Arnold, he’s Cornwallis and when Cornwallis is Cronwallis he’s Benedict Arnold. No one is more important to the cause than Benedict Arnold.” “Alright, thank you caller.” “One more thing I wanna say, is that uh, uh, this idea that uh Abe Lincoln as the guy to lead The Union? Ridiculous. That’s a joke. Robert E.Lee is gonna crush The Union. The problem is an this what you have to worry about if you’re supporting The Union Cause, is Gettysburgh, The Confederacy is gonna crush The Union on The Union’s turf. And if The Union comes into Atlanta? Fuggadbout it! The Confederacy will torch The Union in Atlanta! And uhh one more thing, one more thing, I just wanna say the AWO will be a great thing for Raw Is Whore, it’s gonna be great! It’s gonna be rocketbusters! Nothing ever goes wrong for the company that has stables that end in World Order! ” ANGLESLUT Very nice, very nice. KRISTA Hello, Angela. ANGLESLUT Hello, Krista. I get what you mean to say, but this isn’t a rebellion. We fully intend on working with you to manage our inheritance. And frankly, you should be happy to have me! You rose to prominence shaking your ass on TV, and I rose to prominence by reading big black beasts on TV! I got a gold medal out of my act, and made Equestrian Dressage the 16th most-watched Olympic event. You and I both are aware of that. We don’t have to worry about these Deviants being too stupid to realize that. “BBBBOOOOOOOOOO!” ANGLESLUT I kid, I kid, I make a little joke. Krista knows me, she loves me. Me and Maya went to summer camp together. Maya’s such a colorful character, she’s to die for, she and I have a lot of color in us! KRISTA That has a double meaning. ALIX Hmmmmm??? KRISTA Alix, I can hear the gears grinding in your brain. They sound like they’re dying. Angie means they both get stuffed with black cocks. ALIX I never woud have got it! Thanks, wife! ANGLESLUT Get a little black in ya, get a little white on ya, you know how it goes. See? We have fun! Auntie Krista, I wish we could have a clean transition to the AWO era, but The Nerdregards broke my number one rule: don’t mess with Angela’s stuff! All my life I played by the rules. I even made sure Maya was in her bunk bed by curfew at summer camp. But, they’ve taken my inheritance, the OAOAST, and made it a land with no rules. Now you can do whatever you want, whenever you want, and however you want. So I could give a damn what these bums off the street think! “BBBBOOOOOOOOOO!” ANGLESLUT Instead of booing me why don’t you devot your attention to the simpler things in life, like not eating out of a dumpster! I kid, I kid! We’re just having fun out here! But this isn’t about the Deviants, this is about the AWO. Every single title- DREAMY OVARY, tag, Hard on Hoes. ANGLESLUT Every single one will be ours. And all the billions this company makes. KRISTA Billions? Well, there’s a high demand for beast rape porn! ANGESLUT That money is all coming straight to the AWO. So if the kids with, what do you call it, Dream? DREAMY Call it “inferior genetics.” JENNA That’s it, Angie! If the kids with inferior genetics want to rumble, they can become part of the autobiography of the AWO! Or better yet, the warrant the LAPD will put on us. But I suggest these jobbers lay down and take it, kind of like you did to get Terry to offer you a contract back in 2005, Krista. Because they can go toe to toe with us and we’ll knock them out on every Raw Is Whore for the next twenty years! KRISTA That’s not how I want to spend my 70’s. ANGLESLUT And, Krista, fellow Hotties, I know not everyone can walk around as glammed up as me and Maya, but if you mess with Maya or the AWO you won’t be walking period. DREAMY Hit that rock n roll! “Death by Rock N Roll” hits as the fans can’t process what they’ve witnessed. Some talk to each other, others hop on the net to express shock and outrage. RENEE Alix we have witnessed a turning point for Raw Is Whore! ALIX I forgot to set my VCR! I wasn’t here for the original AWO, but you’d have to be a big fat stinking dummy to not know the kind of damage Anglesault did to this promotion. When I got hired and asked about him, Zack told me running the company as a front for drug dealing wouldn’t have been as bad as Anglesault’s operation! So you know, with drug dealing I tried to link up Zack with my dad, so they- RENEE Nevermind that! Now we have Anglesault’s daughter with Zack’s daughter. It’s not rare to have siblings or kids of past stars. And I guess with Iggy and Wes it wasn’t rare for them to fight for control of the system. But, it’s rare for our Hotties to show that kind of aggression and naked ambition. ALIX Unless that ambition is to get naked to fuck some black guys. Or horses! RENEE The horse thing is one girl. One girl. ALIX Still. She fucks horses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 5, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2022 ATUNA RAGE ATUNA ASS ATUNA DEVESTATION ATUNA WOMAN ATUNA MUSCLE ATUNA TITS via RedGIFs ATUNA PAIN!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 5, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2022 LILLIAN Ladies, and gentlemen, please welcome CHRISTOPHER PATRICK ALLEN here to bless the HARD ON HOES TITLE match with a prayer! RENEE A prayer? Confusing as it may be, we find CPA standing in the ring. His robust figure is covered by an off-white suit along with a purple tye. CPA Glory to the Most High God. And glory be to God for blessing us with this game. Oh come and see. Oh come and see that the game is good! Let God be true. Let this game be true and man be a liar. Amen. “AMEN!” RENEE Hey, that was pretty good! LILLIAN And now it is time for YOUR Taco Duelsday Mainevent featuring “THE FUCK SLUT FROM HELL” MAYA DUNCAN BLANCHARD defending HER HARD ON HOES championship against “THE GREAT BLACK HOPE” LEBRENDA JAMES! “RAW IS WHORE! RAW IS WHORE! RAW IS WHORE!” LILLIAN Introducing first- “WHO YOU TALKING TO MAN?!!” “BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” ALIX Folks, this is not scheduled and this is not good! It’s like my granny used to say- RENEE Stop, stop. Let’s just tell it like it isl Alysanne sitting at ringside is not good for anyone. Alysanne props that cute lil tush by the LITHUANIAN announce desk, Despite the protestations of head referee TITANIA NERDLY. ALIX I’m having flashbacks! Horrible PTSD! I had to once fight Colin and the entrie Black Mass to get the World Heavyweight Championship! Gah, make it stop! Make it stop! RENEE Relax, Alix! It’s just- Obey We hope you have a lovely dayObey You don't want us to come out and play Away, now now There's nothing to see here It's under control We're only gambling with your soulObey Whatever you do, just don't wake up and smell the corruption ALIX No not Synth! Anyone but Synth! Ice Quiz put the chair down! It’s not The Black Mass or Colin, but it was still a frightening sight. Fans hissed at the former school teacher and some even flashed their dicks. RENEE INSERT FACE PALM ETTA Now introducing the SPECIAL GUEST ENFORCER….ETTA KITT! No nickname needed! ALIX I’ve got a nickname for you! A son of a bitch! RENEE Alix! MOMENT OF SILENCE FOR THE CHAMPIONS!!!!! LILLIAN Introducing the challenger, she hails from Akron, Ohio and is accompanied to the ring by LADYBIRD JONES, she is “THE GREAT BLACK HOPE” LEBREEEEENDDAAA JAAAAAAMMMEESSSSSSS! ALIX LeBrenda has that black girl booty, that black girl swag, but will she have that black girl magic? RENEE She says she’ll hit Maya with the basketball so hard that she will keep Maya down for a seven second pin! Maya entered to pull up on me by Alizz... I Don't Need A boyfriend, I just wanna... I don't need your money I already got some I should come with a warning I should come with a warning How do you pull up on a bad bitch, don't you know that I'm a bad bitch It don't matter if you mad rich Can you pull up on a bad bitch? Bad bitch like me Bad bitch like me Bad Bitch like me Bad bitch like me SO PULL UP ON ME~! via GIPHY LILLIAN And the HARD ON HOES CHAMPION, she is a Los Angeles girl born and raised, she is a multi time OAOAST Women’s Champion and Women’s Tag Team Champion she is “THE FUCK SLUT FROM HELL” MAYA DUNCAAAN BLLLAANNNCHAAAARRRD! MAYA There she is Renee, the little girl who’s been riding my strap on and who’s my ride home! RENEE We’ve came with Maya, we’ve moaned with Maya and we’ve celebrated with Maya. But can we, the OAOAST Galaxy do anything against these odds she’s facing here at Taco Duelsday? DING DING DING Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 5, 2022 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2022 LeBrenda snarled at the relaxed Maya, then grew angry over her composure LREBRENDA Fuck you and that mishappen dome of yours! Maya was quite shocked at the mishappen comment! MAYA They look ok, lemme feel them. via RedGIFs LEBRENDA I meant your head, fool! MAYA That goes too far! Maya unloaded on LeBrenda with punches that LBJ could only break with a sudden lockup. Yet, Maya overcame LBJ’s efforts and shoved the challenger into the corner. Immediately, Titania began a count.. ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! MAYA Why are you counting? TITANIA Because- ETTA Do not think you can trick the referee into letting you keep your hold by asking what you already know the answer to. TITANIA I don’t need to take up for me, Etta. ETTA That would be MISS KITT!! MAYA Ok, I’m done now, thanks. Titania shook her head in dismay at Etta causing exactly what Etta feared. RENEE Maya-one, Etta Kitt-zero ALIX Renee, don’t you do your research? Maya is 20 and Etta is 51 RENEE Nevermind. Pleased with her trickery, Maya preened and pranced about the ring as only a Duncan can! via GIPHY Though the pervs worldwide may have enjoyed the youngest Duncan girl, a clenched fist LBJ did not. ALIX Maya very much in LeBrenda’s head. Also, Maya will be giving head for the low-low-low price of 5,000 smakcroos for every five minutes! The Great Black Hope and The Fuck Slut From Hell locked up. Evenly matched the two jockeyed for position. But it was the Akron native winning, sending Maya into the ropes. Maya suffered through a lariat and a round of trash talk for good measure LEBRENDA You ain’t no champ! You a chump! Maya rose swinging, eventually backing LBJ into the ropes. But the charge of the champ saw her overturned onto the apron! Luckily for Maya and her Deviants, the 20 yr old came down her heels. RENEE She landed on high heels. She’s good. Maya saw Etta Kitt make a move out the corner of her big eyes; just enough of a distraction for LBJ to hip toss her inside. Cover…. ONE! An easy kickout! “ETTA SUCKS TRANNY DICK! ETTA SUCKS TRANNY DICK! ETTA SUCKS TRANNY DICK!” ETTA SILENCE! Even Lebrenda found that funny, snickering at her ally. Not so funny: Maya hammering her with fists of fury! Or moderate annoyance. Yet, LeBrenda shut Maya down with a dropsault! RENEE Fadeaway! With Maya groaning in pain, LeBrenda took another opportunity to trash talk. LEBRENDA You know I’m great! You got all these folks scared! I ain’t afraid of no mama’s girl! LeBrenda fooled herself into thinking she had Maya on the ropes; The Great Black hope unleashed her tomahawk chop finisher! But, Maya countered with a pele kick! “YYYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAA!” ALIX No one in the history of sports throws that kick like Maya Duncan-Blanchard! RENEE Ummmm. Maya positioned herself facing away from LeBrenda’s aching bones; the 20 yr old bimbo announced…. MAYA BOOTYTIME~! “BIG WHITE ASS! BIG WHITE ASS! BIG WITE ASS!” ALIX We haven’t seen this since Krista decided it was better to boss around bitches than fight bitches. ETTA I WILL NOT allow this! Etta rose to the apron, ready to discipline the unruly skank. But ever the professional, Titania blocked her entry. ETTA Step aside, werewolf. TITANIA No. You get down! MAYA Hmmm, my give a fuck level? Negative 12. Booty time! Maya shakes that hot white ass… via RedGIFs And hit the big standing moonsault, crushing LeBrenda’s ribs! RENEE Titania has to stop Etta Kitt and can’t count the pin. Etta is doing exactly what she promised Amidst all this confusion, Ladybird snuck into the ring! The Harvard graduate smartly walloped Maya with chop block! RENEE A football move from the Harvard Academic All American! LADYBIRD Who’s boring now?! “PISS BREAK LADYBIRD! PISS BREAK LADYBIRD! PISS BREAK LADYBIRD!” ALIX We know Ladybrid has a watersports kink, but- RENEE We don’t know that! LADYBIRD Admit! I bring the BALLYHOO with my Harvard genius, ladies and gentlemen. I provide classy, highbrow sports entertainment! You ADORE it! Maya threw LeBrenda out of the ring like Uncle Phil did Jazz! ALIX Folks, looking forward to the debut of the Fresh Prince reboot. Isabella plays Latina Soft Ball player Num! Exciting! MAYA Ugh, Ladybird, you just give me vibes of the school who tattled on you because you copied your friend’s math homework. DIE SLOW, CUNT!!!!!!!!! Maya couldn’t control her perhaps irrational disdain for LadyB. The Fuck Slut From Hell left the ring to pound on LeBrenda’s gal! ALIX Sometimes ya gotta let your people go down for you. That’s what LeBrenda’s doing. Same how I gave all my parking tickets to Jade! LadyB reached out for much-needed help. Only, she reached out to Alysanne! Alas, not the sanest of moves, as we soon saw RENEE For the first time ever I am on Alysanne’s side. Ladybird created this mess; she needs to get out of it. ALIX Just don’t come near Ally Cat. I got another set of tacos coming! Maya stashed LeBrenda into a standing head scissors with the crowd buzzing in anticipation! RENEE This looks very bad for the Harvard graduate!! ALIX Heck yeah it is, mang! Maya’s the type of girl to injure you and go… And, If she breaks Ladybird’s neck she’s going out clubbing! But LeBrenda slid beneath the ropes, her fancy kicks smacking Maya in the side of the head! ALIX Good god, LeBrenda saved Ladybird, saved her ally, and saved Krista from asking why she can’t cut injured superstars. We saw vintage 98 WWF brawling with LeBrenda serving up the classic offense. Punches rained down upon the adorable brunette champion; this led the fans to howl disgust and rage towards LeBrenda. TITANIA Bring it back to the ring, LeBrenda! The Great Black Hope returned to the ring with an annoyed sneer. RENEE I hope LeBrenda isn’t trying to win by countout. It’s not only a cheap victory, but it won’t get her the Hard on Hoes Championship. Rather than let Maya languish on the outside, LeBrenda bore into her a plancha!! For one of our poorly trained girls it looked rather uhh competent! LEBRENDA Ya’ll know me!! LADYBIRD We are the Hypebeasts! LEBRENDA I said me. I didn’t say you. LeBrenda ignored LadyB’s puppy dog eyes in her quest for Attitude Era offense. The Nubian babe ascended to the ring apron with Etta watching sharply. Yet even Miss Kitt nodded in approval as LeBrenda dropped a Dude Love style elbow the champ! “OOOOOOOOH!” ALIX Is there any fight, is there any silicone left in Maya Duncan-Blanchard? You have to ask yourself that after that serious ass move! LeBrenda pushed Maya into the ring for the pivotal pinfall… ONE TWO!! A kickout!!! RENEE I think that time getting Maya in the ring allowed The Fuck Slut From Hell to recover. ALIX Folks, lemme tell you, there ain’t no way to heal from a black girl dropping that thing on ya! LeBrenda loaded up the offenses, taking warm-up jumpers to prepare for THE SLAM DUNK! ALIX She’s gonna close it out! Derozan, Lilliard, Simmons, Westbrook, and now LeBrenda. Luckily, LeBrenda didn’t hear that backhanded compliment!! Instead, she drilled the rising Maya with a THUNDEROUS TOMAHAWK CHOP!! ALIX SLAM DUNK! SLAM DUNK! SLAM DUNK!!! BILL WALTONTHROW IT DOWN, BIG MAN! ALIX Aiyo, you’re supposed to be guarding the stash! One might expect the pinfall; yet, LeBrenda spent her valuable time taunting Alysanne… LEBRENDA Bring that big ol bitch out! You got that big ass girl. Ol big for no reason bitch. Got them muscles to twist Smuckers jars. Big ugly bitch! ETTA Pin her you idiot! LeBrenda didn’t appreciate being called an idiot. Buuuut, losing the contest would cause great suffering, thus she hurriedly hooked Maya’s leg… ONE! TWO! NO!!!!!! “WE LOVE THE FUCK SLUT! WE LOVE THE FUCK SLUT! WE LOVE THE FUCK SLUT!” RENEE LeBrenda made a major mistake! She took time to taunt Lady XFL, which you should never do. And now, she may have altered the course of her career. In a bad way. LeBrenda huffed and puffed, but only could blame herself for blowing her house down. She raked Maya’s pretty face across the ropes, yet did nothing to further her fading cause. ALIX LeBrenda going out like she shot 8 for 40 over the last three games. Sad. LeBrenda railed off body blows, landing enough to whip Maya into the ropes. Alas, the chickens came to roost as the cocksucker hammered the chicken-shit grappler with a scissors kick! RENEE Inheritance Kick! LeBrenda rolled over on her back, seeing both stars and title dreams slipping away! MAYA Mom says we live in the land of retreads, reboots, and regrets! So here’s a reboot of a retrad I’ll regret when I’m running for office… BOOTYTIME Maya shakes that billion-dollar ass a second time… via RedGIFs And drew the ire of Etta Kitt! Once again, the Oklahoma 1993 teacher of the year tried to get into the ring. As Titania held her back, again, Maya hit the sault! RENEE Maya landed in a pin, but Titania has no choice but to handle Etta! ETTA Do not make me discipline you, child! TITANIA Try it! Meanwhile, Ladybird yanked Maya out of the ring! Bad, bad, bad idea as Maya hammered Ladybird with enough punches to back her into the guardrail! ALIX They’re right near the front row, where all the real pervs sit! Indeed, the pervs copped a feel on Ladybird as Maya booted her in the butt! LADYBIRD Ouch! Ouch! Stop hitting me! MAYA Kk, will. Instead, Maya used Ladybird’s hand to punch the Hardvard grad! MAYA Stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself! LeBrenda wasn’t much help either; her appearance saw her inverted atomic dropped onto the guardrail! RENEE She’s very lucky she’s LeBrenda and not LeBron! A clothesline from The Fuck Slut From Hell sent LeBrenda AND Ladybird toppling into the real pervs’ laps! ALIX Good god almighty! LeBrenda and Ladybird landed on their heads right on the Deviants’ heads! RENEE Their other head! MAYA Phew, all this is taking a toll on my Gen-Z need for health and wells, so c’mere big daddy and get me well! An lifelong OAOAST fan, who was 27 when Anglesault faced A-Train in 2003 got the treat of his middle aged life…. “LUCKY BASTARD! LUCKY BASTARD! LUCKY BASTARD!” ETTA Oh no, UNACCEPTABLE! 😨 Etta’s never ending sense of properity sent her running in another effort to reign Maya in. Her charge coincided with LeBrenda lobbing a basketball at Maya’s head! However, The Fuck Slut From Hell ducked the shot! No airball here as Etta took it on the face! She crumpled to the ground, the fans settling for her taking that load to the face! ALIX That ball smacked Etta like Spike Lee would smack the hair plugs off Trae Young! Maya sent LeBrenda tumbling over the guardrail. Hapless, LeBrenda stumbled into the ring with the grace of Bol Bol at the ballet. Life grew worse for LeBrenda as Maya crushed her with a slingshot leg drop! ALIX LeBrenda is going out like the 2012-2013 Lakers. Acting strictly on instinct and desperation, LeBrenda reversed Maya’s irish whip into a slide behind front Russian leg sweep! RENEE No one ever has doubted LeBrenda’s talent. ALIX We Just kinda doubt her morals, her ethics, her decency, her capacity for kindness, her ability to love. RENEE Yeah, just those things. LeBrenda pitched Maya out of the ring and took a few moments for a breather. Then she came back like Jordan wearing the 45 with a suicide dive that took out Maya with lethal accuracy! A 19 year girl cosplaying as Maya held her phone up to film her idol. Arrogant till the end, LeBrenda gloated in front of the super fangirl! ALIX I guess that’s better than that WWE luchadore wanting to beat up Izzy’s dad. Maya did the fucking up, suddenly mowing down LeBrenda with a lariat! Ill from the suicide dive, Maya couldn’t stop LeBrenda from recovering and running her into the guardrail. But when LeBrenda tried it again Maya turned it into a DDT into the steel! Yet, Maya couldn’t capitalize due to Etta Kitt crawling towards her. ALIX Take that guardrail and hit Etta in the head with it, Maya! Then shove it up her ass! RENEE Alix! Maya tried to focus her offense on LeBrenda; The Great Black Hope blocked the punches and back body dropped the champ onto the LED ramp! ALIX You can break more than the ramp, and more than Toni Patrica’s bank account with that one, you can break your whole booty! LeBrenda furthered her attack by beating Maya up to the XXX entrance stage and back down the ramp! Maya tried to fight back but suffered through a snap DDT onto the multicolored light ramp! “OOOOOHHHHHHH!” ALIX Damn it, what more can a human being do to another human being? What more can Papa Duncan do to Genevieve from divorcing him and taking 75 percent! RENEE 75 percent?! Give me her divorce lawyer’s email address. ALIX Breaking news, Renee is cheating with big dick trannies!!! RENEE Alix! Maya used the guardrail to pull herself upright, getting fondled and groped by the fans! Never mind the title match, there’s a 20 yr old skank to feel up! This left Etta fuming… via GIPHY LEBRENDA Ai, ai, Ladybird, get me my AIR MAX SPRAY! RENEE Air Max what? Ladybird rushed over like a good bench warmer and handed LeBrenda spray bottle! No complaints here as the Nubian goddess washed down that tight black bod… “YYYYEEEAAAAAAAAA!” Naturally, LeBrenda wanted to use it as a weapon on Maya, but Titania snatched it out the challenger’s hands! Nonetheless, AIR MAX LEBRENDA=ACHIEVED! The challenger loaded up another SLAM DUNK…. But the fondling fans got such a hold of the dumb champ that they yanked her away from LBJ! “THIS IS WRESTLING! THIS IS WRESTLING! THIS IS WRESTLING!” the fans sung as LeBrenda pulled herself from the guardrail ALIX It’s how I got my start. Maya exited the stands with a bit more protein than she came in with… And used a surge of sperm-based power to run down both HYPEBEASTS! RENEE Forget women’s evolution we have women’s degradation! Maya forced the dazed LeBrenda back into the ring. The champ got a little cocky with a big double run off the ropes only to get blasted by the FADEAWAY dropsault! “OOOOHHHHHHHH!” Cover…. ONE! TWO! Maya with the shoulder up! The Great Black Hope stashed the champ into a chinlock, worrying the legion of Fuck Slut worshippers. At least they could enjoy the close up of Maya’s tits! “LET’S GO MAYA! LET’S GO MAYA! LET’S GO MAYA!” Maya used her spunk (the other kind) to battle out of the chinlock! But, LeBrenda kept on the attack and drilled the champ with a chincrusher! RENEE Hoop Dreams! As Maya moaned in pain, LeBrenda hooked the leg for a pin… ONE! TWO! Another kickout! LeBrenda tried to send the bodacious babe into the corner and found herself thrown instead! BiIIIIIIIG BACK BODY DROP sent LeBrenda overhead! Overhead and onto her feet! Maya swung around and got drilled by the SLAM DUNK! The brunette whore went down like she took Painbow’s dick to the face! Cover… ONE! TWO! THREE! NO!!! A KICKOUT! “MAYA! MAYA! MAYA!” Fuming, LeBrenda brought Maya to her feet and whacked her forearms. But, Maya shocked her with a sudden snake eyes! The challenger staggered back into Maya’s fireman’s carry effort! RENEE Maya looking for that fireman’s carry into a one handed x-factor better known as After School Special! LeBrenda’s struggles forced Maya to swing around for balance…and conk Titania in the face! Still, Maya executed the After School Special! “YYYYEAAAAAAAAA!” ALIX This match is even better than Bill Lambieer Combat basketball!! Maya made a desperate pin; Titania shook off her pain to score it… CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! NO! ETTA YANKED TITANIA OUT OF THE RING! Meanwhile Ladybird slid the basketball into the ring! Even worse: Ladybird produced a second basketball from beneath the ring! ALIX Get Ladybird the F outta here and into the WWE so she can take that bball and knock that clown make up off their trannies! We’ll have to settle for JADE RODEZ DUNCAN, who blubbered her way to ringside and bashed with Ladybird in the back with all that fat! ALIX It’s not a Sloppy Joe gimmick, gang. Sloppy Joe went “Fat, fat, fat” and Jade goes “Fat, FAT, fat, FAT.” You see? With the one basketball in the hand, LeBrenda shot the jumper of a lifetime! Which promptly led to Maya smacking the ball into the black bitchs gorgeous face! ALIX LeBrenda promised she’d hit Maya so could she’d hold her down Not 1 not 2 not 3 not 4 not 5 not 6, but seven seconds! RENEE Can’t see that happening! With a taste of Spalding medicine, LeBrenda ate a leapfrog face crusher from the Los Angeles native! “YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAA!” ALIX iMaya! iMaya! iMaya! The cover…. CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREEEEEEEEE! DING DING DING Winner: Maya Duncan Blanchard, via pinfall!! RENEE Maya overcame every odd LeBrenda, Ladybird and Etta Kitt could throw at her. And she came out still the Hard on Hoes champion! ALIX Whoooo hoooo, Maya’s gonna be a good fuck tonight! She’s already sweaty and she’s weak. We’re totally gonna take advantage of her! The overriding philoopshy of this den of pervision: Maya must pose! We’ve known her since she’s a little girl, yet we’ve got full grown hardons over the 20 yr old bitch! But, lurking on the outside with a scowl splitting her face? ETTA KITT! FADE OUT! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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