Chanel #99 Posted February 12, 2017 Report Share Posted February 12, 2017 TV M L, V, N, SSCPRESENTED IN OAOASTHD* DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA *Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid's shock and delight.THE OAOAST... WHAT THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD IS READING~! A historical rundown of Anglepalooza's past plays, but then it cuts in to a live stream of Pete-O beating off so that ends a little too slowly to be comfortable and then we are cutting live inside the arena as a crystal ball drops to set off the pyro and ballyhoo! BOOM!BOOM!BOOM! B O O M ANGLEPALOOZA 2017 RENEE Welcome to the 2017 edition of Anglepalooza! What are you about to witness? Mayhem, insanity and a whole lot of sex! I am Renee Young here at Sofa Central where we will see if Spencer Reiger can make good on everyone's expectations that he would one day be a world champion, and who will mainevent AngleMania 3000! But before we get to all that we have a boat load of naked Hotties and superstars at ringside for the Lethal Bang! The camera pans around to show all the participants in the Lethal Bang! RENEE Normally the champion helps me commentate on the Lethal Bang, but well since the cooties test, Sugar has refused to leave her mom's basement. So to help me out here's the Queen of All Media especially Erotic Media...KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN! I stay out too late Got nothing in my brain That's what people say, mmm-mmm That's what people say, mmm-mmm I go on to many dates [chuckle] But I can't make 'em stay At least that's what people say, mmm-mmm That's what people say, mmm-mmm But I keep cruising Can't stop, won't stop moving It's like I got this music In my mind Singing, "It's gonna be alright." 'Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake I shake it off, I shake it off Heart-breakers gonna break, break, break, break, break And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake I shake it off, I shake it off The DC fans erupt with huge cheers and soon huge erections as the Queen of All Media shows why she's also the queen of creating boners... RENEE Oh! Oh my! Uh, welcome! Far different than Coach's entrance. KRISTA Gotta get limbered up for all the hot slippery sex I'm gonna have. RENEE Actually you're just gonna help me announce. KRISTA Can I grab your boobies? RENEE Maybe, but let's get to the intro of the Hotties! BUFFER It is time for the 2017 Lethal Bang! The winning Hottie will be the last Hottie who oragasms! The winner will get a Hotties title shot at SluttyMania 3!!!!! KRISTA Uh, aren't we missing the last winner? I notice these sorts of things, when hot women are absent. RENEE Maybe Gretchen is making a big intro? BUFFER First from Ocean City, New Jersey...EUPHORIA!!! KRISTA You say no to ratchet pussy, Tony Tourettes can't. BUFFER From Los Angeles, California..she represents Sunrise, "THE FUCK SLUT FROM HELL" MAYA DUNCAN BLLLAANNCCCHHAAARD! KRISTA Someone's gonna cream in my teen! RENEE Probably multiple someones. KRISTA Could my day get any better! RENEE From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, “THE TITY MAMA” MELODY NERDLLLY! KRISTA Those tits wet my pussy in ways not seen since Britney Spears burst on the scene! RENEE High praise! BUFFER From Asgard, she represents SUNRISE...THE ANARCHIC ANGEL...ANNAGRET WICKEDBORN! RENEE Sugar has tossed her TV dinner at the wall right now. BUFFER From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, MOLLY “SHOWGIRL” NERDLY!!!! KRISTA If you don't think a hot mousy girl getting drilled by bunches of dudes is hot then Trump needs to ban you from life. BUFFER From Caledra, Chilie, RHAENYS! RENEE It would be a big night if Rhaenys won the Lethal Bang and The All XFL team won the six man belts. KRISTA It would be a bigger night if Xavier killed himself. BUFFER From Chatanooga, Tennessee, representing Sunrise, "SLEEPING BEAUTY" DECEMBER BELLE!! KRISTA The Tooth Fairy, and December, truly The People's Champ's greatest works. BUFFER From Yaroslavl, Russia.."THE VIOLET SHARK" ANASTASIA VIOLETTA!!! MELSSIA AHEM! BUFFER She is accompanied by MELISSA NERDLY! RENEE Usually you don't have managers at the Rumble. KRISTA Cuckolding takes on many a strange form! BUFFER From Boston Massachusetts, representing DELTA DELTA DELTA Cassidy Number Two! RENEE Hey, she's willing to have sex somewhere besides a graveyard good for her! BUFFER And from Boston, Massachusetts, also representing DELTA DELTA DELTA ,CASSIDY MAGUIRE! CASSIDY Hey, let's get to the truth asswipes! Morgan and Diabetes JR spiked Gretchen's tea with an aphrodisiac and she's been orgasming all day and that's why she's not here! MORGAN Did I? I don't remember much but it must be my ptsd, thanks for announcing me though. Cassidy has to be held back by Number Two and some of the guys in the Bang! KRISTA I am outraged! I paid Sophie a lot of money to lemme out here and now no Gretchen. Will someone stop me from molesting you next? RENEE Yikes! BUFFER From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, MALYSIA NERDLY! KRISTA Nipple clamps, spankings, fish hooking...so many good memories of last Tuesday with Malaysia. BUFFER From Chesterton, England, “YOUR CRIMSON DREAM GIRL” RUUUBBBYY! RENEE Jim Cornette- KRISTA Stop, that name is worse than cooties. BUFFER From Val D'Ors, Quebec, Canada, “THE CINDERELLA FROM THE GARDEN OF SLAUGHTER” PIERETTE SAINT NERDREGARD!! PIERETTE Yay violence! CASSIDY Hey ginger rainman, this is an orgy. PIERETTE No killing? Boooooo! BUFFER From Lovelock, Nevada, THE SPICE OF LIFE....CINNAMON SPOONS! KRISTA She had sex with a horse. A guy hung like a horse is no problem! BUFFER From Boston, Massachusetts, she represents The Menagerie...REAGAN FLANAGAN! RENEE So many Hotties from Boston, go Pats! RENEE From Saratoga Springs, New York..."THE KINSLAYER" DEIRRDREE! KRISTA Hi, I killed my family, feel free to beat off to me. BUFFER And from Los Angles, California, THE BOOTY MAMA...JADE RODEZ DUNCCCAAN! KRISTA I love my daughters, but I show everyone else's kids just as much love as I do them! RENEE Lock up your daughters, America! BUFFER Let the 2017 Lethal Bang begin! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 12, 2017 Author Report Share Posted February 12, 2017 The Bang is on as we focus on Riggs sliding his dick inside the sexy and hungry pussy of one Molly Nerdly. Mousy, she may be Molly squeals in delight and pleasure from the full feeling within her sex. Right next to Molly is Deirdre being pounded hard and fast by Bosley! So hard that she cums! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 1st: Deirdre ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ KRISTA No one even got a chance to do some guilt ridden masturbating over her. As Deirdre stomps off a failure, Reagan is riding the rod of Brian Travis Kidd, her soaking cunt clinched tightly around the teenager's dick as he tries his hardest not to cum with her repeated fantastic thrusts downwards. REAGAN YES, that cock of yours is marvelous! I know why the young women like you so much, young man! December is already getting quite the exhausting drilling, splayed out on the floor with Money Marc pressing into her shoulders as his cock presses into her cervix! December yells out in a combo of joy and pain but the experienced whore refuses to cum! RENEE December won the first ever Lethal Bang, and she's got a great chance to win this. KRISTA I dunno, she's the only person that can orgasm during a coma I bet. Imagine now that she's fully awake. Morgan has the heroic duo of Tim Cash and Biffman thrusting hard into her in very unheroic manners! Morgan squeaks in surprise but doesn't protest, instead gripping down with her fuck hole and asshole and letting the heroes have their damn dirty way with her! Morgan thinks she has this all under control, confident in her ability to take a heavy double stuffing. But much to everyone's amazement, she cums within moments! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 2nd: Morgan Nerdly ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Cassidy has a good laugh at Morgan's expense, but the real news is now arriving in the form of Bi Curious George!!!! KRISTA Ah! No! No sir! BCG Boys, I am ready to get STUFFED! RENEE But Sophie comes out to clear things up! SOPHIE George, you are in zhe Rumble not zhe Bang! Zhe RUMBLE! Well this isn't the news BCG wanted but nonetheless he holds his head with pride and skips backstage. KRISTA Sofi deserves a raise for saving us. Meanwhile, Melissa is forsaking her vows to Christ by rooting on Anastasia as she takes a most uncomfortable ass fucking from Rayder! Rayders' hard fuck is on a hastened pace, he pumps in her ass with his hands gripping her hips. The Russian super hottie feels his organ swell inside her and his bouncing sack tighten. He collides quickly and heavily with her backside, his hairy scrotum slapping slapping her between the thighs, making her figure jiggle for the amusement of her tormentors. ANASTASIA Can we switch positions? MELISSA You think Christ said can we switch to a futon off this crucifix? Heckie no! KRISTA At least that buck tooth inbred hick knows what I wanna see. Way on the other side of the ring, a lesser woman might have had the life pounded out of her the way Euphoria takes it from behind by Daisuke! Moving and grinding, Daisuke gives Euphoria a strong style fucking! Hugging close to her, he pumps deep and quick, each plunge nudging her cervix. Her walls cling to him, massaging his girth, milking him so that her uterus can be fed. With gasps of air in between them, giggles and yelps speed out a seriously turned on Euphoria. PAPA DUNCAN Hey, she won't even let Tone diddle her like that. What gives? EUPHORIA Hissssssss! MAYA Hey, hey, I know what grandpa likes and he doesn't like worrying about Tony's boner. He likes his hot teenage granddaughter taking his fat meat. Doesn't he? KRISTA The family that plays together cums together. That's our motto! Maya lies on her tummy pretty risky considering the size of Papa Duncan! But this slut is a warrior and doesn't even flinch when her grandpa plows into her with enough force to have her leaving an imprint on the ground! Wild screams come from Maya's mouth as there's nothing she loves more than incest and there's no pecker she loves more than her dear old grandpa's! Maya trembleds as her grandpa mounts her , her breathy moans only building her anticipation of him cumming. But grandad still has stamina and just kept hitting that little, useless barrier, each contact making her anatomy warm in his embrace. The teenage whore sort of drifts off into a stupor as he hammers her needy cunt. KRISTA Arrrrgh! I gotta get in there! I am a Horny Mule! I need my daughters' pussies, I need all this dick! RENEE Calm down! KRISTA Ahhh a peak down your shirt is just what I needed! Cash is on his knees, treating Pierette the way a lady is supposed to be treated. His stubble tickles the inside of her thighs, while his tongue plays with her asshole of all things! Pierette groans and groans, loving the pussy fingering and ass eating no one knew Cash was capable of! In fact Cash is quite the talented pussy eater and gets Pierette to cum! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 3rd: Pierette St.Nerdregard ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ PIERETTE Awww, I didn't even get to stab any cute boys. KRISTA Wanting to stab a good looking guy, huh? She already knows what its like to be married to Ned. Annagret is on her knees, fingering her pussy as Flynm Stevens beats off over her. This is a dream come true once more for Annagret, in a submissive position to big black dick. ANNAGRET Oh yeah, daddy, give me that nice hot African load. Annagret gets it alright! More than just a load, a megaload of cum springs from Flynn's dick and drenches the face of the nineteen year old goddess. Annagret couldn't be a happier slut as oodles and oodles of jizz rocket out the BBC and splatter across her pretty white face. Number Two gets pussy filled fully by the long hard member of one Vinny Valentine. Even though Vinny fucks like a raging river running through her sex canal, Number Two handles it with ease. Almost creepy ease as she whistles the soundtrack of Howard the Duck while his veiny shaft rearanges her insides. KRISTA Is she even old enough to know who or what Howard the Duck is? Melody is on her knees and going where no woman and I do mean no woman has ever gone before, and that's with her tongue right up Heavy D's ass! KRISTA Damn, I have to step my depravity game up! Melody feels like she's under some sort of spell, her mind numb and animal, lust filled instincts taking over. Heavy D's asshole seems to have some sort of magnet that attracts Melody's tongue. The hard working tongue licks up and down his ass crack while her face displays a wide smile when she comes up for air! But Heavy D wants more ass eating and brings one hand to the back of her head and guides her movements, one minute coaxing her to jack hammer his asshole with his tongue, the next holding her face in his ass while she suck and lick the outer rim of his anus. Flynn is back at again, this time joining up with Painbow of TMW fame to give Cassidy a proper spitroast! Flynn slams heavy and hard, spurring the small frame of the white girl forward and causing her to take more of a mouthful of black dick than she can handle! Cassidy may be a bit uncomfortable at the feeling of two huge dark rods tearing into her, but the pleasure is all worth it! EUPHORIA What a sight! I'm just gonna kick back and enjoy all the hot fucking! KRISTA You can't waste stoned pussy! She has to fuck, I fuck under every influence there is. That's why I'm such a bad influence. Euphoria rubs her moist slit, showing she aint quite ready to kick back. Her lips part for entry and she sinks in two fingers to fuck herself while surveying the most legendary orgy in town!! She sure does make a crazy but hot sight, rapidly attacking her cunny with all her might! RENEE As long as she doesn't orgasm she should be ok. But she does orgasm! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 4th: Euphoria ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ EUPHORIA Did I do that? Tee-heh! Euphoria isn't too upset about her epic fail and instead bounds off to be with her "pudding." KRISTA Ewww, I think her pudding has been curdled since 1996. The show keeps on a rolling and the people keep on a masturbating with the home viewing audience treated to Rhaenys' asshole taking all sorts of punishment from Brock. The huge warrior just surges his mighty hip upright and completely owns and dominates Rhaenys' now incredibly sore asshole, while Ice Quiz jerks off over her! ICE QUIZ Daaaaaaamn, nigga going in on his home girl! I fucks with that though! KRISTA I don't fuck with him talking, he's making people's penis' go soft. Rhaenys may have expected Brock to take it easy on her, but that's the exact opposite of what's going down! Brock is a bull enraged and his dick are hints gorging poor Rhaenys' asshole! RHAENYS Ahhhhh! Jesus Christ! Jesus! Christ! KRISTA I'm jealous! I'm so jealous! Finger my booty, Renee! RENEE Settle down Krista we have a job to do. Bobbi is on her knees riddled dickmatized by the ferocious and powerful penis of Outlaw Cello! Bobbi screams in delight and raw doggy heat! This is better than being fisted for her. Outlaw keeps pounding away at her slut hole, bringing her to very summits of pleasure and pain. Bobbi continues to scream at the rapid stretching of her nineteen year old cunt. Each thrust, each movement expands Bobbi's perfect little skank hole. The moans from Asscake grow higher and higher until Bobbi lets out a roar! BOBBI This weiner is so big it should be outlawed! About two feet away Bang newcomer, Ruby is being taken from behind by Brian Travis Kidd! Ruby is hollering for more, feeling the intense horny heat of taking a furious dick from this hot stud! The lean boy pumps his slender hips into her, not fucking like a madman though. Rather he fucks like a gentle lover, giving Ruby more pleasure than she can really handle. MALAYSIA You're gonna cum! RUBY How wrong you are! Ruby is pushing back against BTK, loving the sensation, the dirtiness of it, the wrongness of it. And it becomes very dirty as Brian pours a in his piping hot load into her snatch. The magic of getting her insides coated with cum pushes Ruby over the edge and causes her to orgasm! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 5th: Ruby ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MALAYSIA I told you! Like it or not Men-U-Pause remains the top bitches! KRISTA Oh yeah, top me, whip me, beat me! RENEE Krista, please calm down. Number Two has her hips gripped firmly by Riggs as he licks and tongues and just feasts on her asshole! Number Two is arching her back and popping her ass obscenely for Riggs. Riggs is more than up to the task of ass eating. He's pulling apart her cheeks so her pucker can accept his hard wet tongue which slides deep within her tailpipe. NUMBER TWO This is for you, Gretchen. Number Two doesn't exactly sound overly enthused, but trust me she is. Riggs' tongue is clinging to her asshole and the pale blond really does now know why Gretchen loves getting her ass eaten so much. Actually she learns it too well as she cums! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 6th: Cassidy #2 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CASSIDY Damn it, Number Two, you couldn't outlast Yakov? NUMBER TWO Can I have a do-over? CASSIDY There are no do-overs, you div! That "yakov" is Anastasia who has made a dick sandwich out of Al Houd's man meat and her big, big knockers! Maybe even Putin has had this from the ex secret agent, her titties squeezing the holy life out of Al Houd, milking precum from him! The position is so intimate that Anastasia can smell the scent of precum and dick. The movement makes him harder and harder, even if he really wished it was Melissa! Insert Anastasia 9 tit job MELISSA Ya'll better not let me down! I gotta get this win over Delta House! KRISTA Then maybe this awwww shucks huckleberry piece if shit should be spreading her legs! Krista's mood improves dramatically when she spots her eldest daughter riding the hell out of Piercey D's dick! KRISTA Unclecest is low on my incest fangirldom but you can never go wrong with my kid's booty! Preach! The booty mama is throwing down what she got from her mama on her uncle, grinding her big fat ass into his lap as his eyes almost literally bug out their sockets. I mean forget even the way she worms and wiggles his member within her, the real story is how fucking fantastic her big ol ass looks on her uncle's lap! JADE Mmmm, feel that big ass, Uncle Pierce? You can get it whenever you want it! PIERCE Right on niece-bro!!! For anyone but a black cock fiend, Annagret might be in a bad way! But Annagret is the patron saint of black cock fiends and has no problems with CPA impaling her asshole, with Marcellus Wallace walloping her cunt. The pussy pounding is easy enough to deal with, but her pucker is overtaken with a sharp pain that only worsened as CPA pushs deeper, provoking her to bite her lip to stomach the black assault on her asshole.Feeling a bit alpha, Wallace feels the need to match CPA's brutality and makes mincemeat out of the white teenager's insides! CPA's retreat to her entrance way bit as agonizing as the plunge back inside, and with the addition of pulling on her anal ring, making it drag along his length. Annagret's pussy ain't helping her, clinching down on Wallace's invading fuck tool, a fuck tool that brooks no resistance and beats the hell out off Annagret's clinching vagina! ANNAGRET I love how black dick feels when it tears up my pussy and asshole! I love it! KRISTA Mmmph! Lemme in there! I want those cocks! RENEE Krista! Sit down! You're dripping all over the place! With Ruby out the picture, Malaysia can concentrate on winning her first Lethal Bang, and she's just the bitch to do, although Bosley is sure treating her mouth like she's a bitch! His fucking cock is sure fucking her mouth like she wants to cram it all the way down her throat. The dom feels like a sub as it feels like her mouth is being ripped apart! Jizz and spit trail down her mouth, to her chin and finally to her big boobs. RENEE Yikes! How can she stand that? KRISTA I'd hate to give him any sort of credit, but she's taken Jock's dick down that gullet, that's almost like fucking Cinnamon's horse! Reagan is moaning and writhing in delight atop Christian Wright's dick, and what woman wouldn't do the same with a lady's man like CW? She feels herself tighten and then release, every muscle in her body convulsing as a tidal wave of pleasure sweeps through her. REAGAN Ahhhhhh, cummmmmmminnnng! ~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 7th: Reagan Flanagan ~~~~~~~~~~~ CASSIDY Back to watching reruns of Mama's Family, grandma! RENEE With that kind of feisty spirit, Cassidy might be better in the Rumble than the Bang! Maya's situation makes Malaysia's look like something out a romance novel! Warthog's has her arms raised into the air, while he relentlessly and more importantly joyfully plunges his fat black meat into her teenage mouth. A huge sack filled with sperm swings back and forth, as the bulbous cock above it terrorizes her mouth! The cock hungry school girl is getting more than her daily dose of black dick, as Warthog refuses to let her go, so in love with the teenage hottie. The pretty babe can feel her own saliva mixing with the pre-cum along the length of the dick as she gets worked over. It quickly pooles at her lower lip and dripped down onto her long arcing seams of spittle. KRISTA Yay, I don't have to feed her, she's getting plenty of dark meat right now. RENEE Warthog looks in love. You might have a future son in law on your hands! December has her legs spread wide open as her asshole and pussy gets torn wide open by Ice Quiz and Vinny Valentine! The hip hop icon and the disco icon are fucking the usually lazy whore in horny earnest, and Sleeping Beauty is wide awake for wide splitting their doing to her most intimate of holes! December is grinning a happy smile, full of cock and surrounded by the odor of males in heat! DECEMBER Ah, ah, ah! Double penetrations are pretty cool I think. But I like double anal the best. KRISTA Renee and I totally agree with that. RENEE Yikes! I'm just an innocent announcer, people. 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Chanel #99 Posted February 21, 2017 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2017 Quentin Benjman has taken Rhaenys from behind, which I wonder what The XFL will think! Panting like a bitch on heat, Rhaenys tenses her legs as she feels a wave of something completely foreign start to build up inside her! A wave of orgasm crashes through her and rips her from reality into a place of sheer passion and pleasure! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 8: Rhaenys ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RHANEYS Wait...wait! Quentin, how could you?! How could you! KRISTA What a reaction. "And the results of the lie detector test, Rhaenys, is he did sleep with your dad." "Wait..wait! Quentin, how could you! How could yooooouuuuu!" RENEE I think we have to wonder what The XFL's reaction will be to that. KRISTA Nope, we sure don't have to wonder because do not give a fuck. As Rhaenys stalks off, she walks past Melody who's riding the dick of Brock Ausstin. Well, that doesn't sit well in Rhaenys' mind, that her stablemates should still get pleasure, so she shoves Melody off Brock, shocking the normally stoic monster! MELODY Hell no! RIP in peace, biznitch! Melody makes like Lucius and pimps slap Rhaneys! "YYYYYYEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!" The naked duo engages in one of the hottest catights of the year, but one so wild and heated it carries Melody backstage and out the contest! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 9th: Melody Nerdly ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ KRISTA That's not fair. Do you mean to tell me if Melody comes back and wants a blowbang someone they say "Melody, you're eliminated, no one wants to see you suck more dicks, they want to uphold the sacred sanctity of the Allah blessed mass orgy?" Badass Jack is plunging into Bobbi's virgin tight opening as her leg hangs back across his rib cage. Thanks to this position, his massive weapon is able get the full warmth and snuggness of her little fuck hole. The taught skin of the big purple crown is awash in Bobbi's slutty arousal, and just so we don't miss that fact, she hollers her burning passion! BOBBI Oh shoot! Oh freaking yeah!! Wheeeeee! Drowning in lust is Malaysia Nerdly, who's overstuffed with huge hard dicks, Pierce's schlong crammed in her mouth, Doc White buried in her pussy and Joey The Rat mousing around in her asshole! The tatted up dominatrix screams in delight around Pierce's bro-cock as the men show no chill whatsoever and her hole struggle to accommodate such big furious peckers! Even with all the sex she has, Malaysia is feeling damn tight and damn wet which at least helps ease penises into her pussy and mouth. RENEE Now that's a gangbang! KRISTA Ohhhh, I can sure you some gangbangs that'll make that look positively puritanical. RENEE I bet you could! Lil Wayne said pop that pussy for a real nigga, and Cinnamon is popping that pussy on a real wigga...Ice Quiz! ICE QUIZ Shout outs to Nicole Aniston, Brandi Love, shout outs to Brian Pumper, shout outs to Peter North, but not for no gay shit. KRISTA God, I wish he and Xavier would die in a plane crash. Cinnamon might be worthy of those illustrious porn names, rolling her hips back and forth, sucking up as much cock as her cunt can handle. With all the mighty thrusts of her hips, the almighty valkyrie rams herself flush to the hilt full of big ass wigga dick! Molly has the long stiff dick of Christian Wright planted inside her well fucked asshole, while Scourge slides through her sopping wet pussy. The NYU grad is stretched to the limit and far beyond with the double cock fucking, two nice big long cocks obscenely violating two of her holes. Molly is breathing so hard and being fucked so hard she can scarcely think straight! MOLLY Ahh, ahhh, ahhhhhhhhh! Oh my God! Is what Molly probably wanted to say. The adorable pale skinned brunette can't take much more than these two cocks, having gone far and above what she ever thought she was capable of! She'd like a third one, one in her mouth, but as of now all good things come to end even for Molly. MOLLY Ooohhh ahhhhh, I'm cummmming! Oohhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhh! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 10th: Molly ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Just as Molly walks off with her head held high a dick up the ass from Quentin Benjamin has Anastasia cumming! MELISSA No! No! N to the o! She's faking it, ain't you faking it! CASSIDY If she's faking it she shouldn't just be kicked out this match, she should be kicked out this genepool for being a total asshat. Beat it, idiot hookers. MELISSA ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 11: Anastasia Violetta ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Anastasia runs off in tears as Melissa starts to wish she had brought her guitar to lay waste to a taunting Cassidy. KRISTA I mean, like, she could you know use her fists, but then she wouldn't be a giant pussy. Good riddance to bad apples! RENEE So that leaves seven Hotties left with a shot at glory and glory holes! Cassidy Maguire, Jade Rodez-Duncan, Maya Duncan-Blanchard, Malaysia Nerdly the longest lasting Nerdly, Cinnamon Spoons and Bobbi Cheesecake! The BTK and JoJo are two well hung young studs and they are giving December the double penetration of a lifetime! Her toned belly tightens as she can feel the dominating power in which the beefcakes blast her culo and punta(?)! There's a tense rising in both the boys as they fight to delay their own orgasms so they can stay hard inside this wet and hot slut hole of the laziest slut in town. DECEMBER I was scared when I heard there would be a Lethal Gang here, but they're a lot like the Lethal Bang. KRISTA Warthog has just about found vaginal gold and that golden puss belongs to nineteen year old Maya Duncan Blanchard! The perky babe is bouncing back and forth against Warthog's huge frame while his massive black dick violates her innards. The teenage whore is wailing with joy as she's repeatedly and wildly drilled, while beyond them in TV land fans are no doubt shooting ropey loads of semen over this hot and violent fucking of the young babe. MAYA Wow, mister! This is such a good cock, mister! Thank you! KRISTA My girl is always polite. RENEE I see that. Cinnamon is on her back and screaming for The Time Killers to cum for her. Well screaming in her own special way, CINNAMON Oh, noble heroes of those who make teenage screams happen lay your seed upon this holy knight! ANNAGRET What a loser. But that's just the motivation the hot hunks need as BTK lets Cinnamon use her hands to coax out rives of sperm from him and JoJo unleashes his seed all across her pelvis, the pretty blond coated in bright white gold. KRISTA Boooooo! Creampie or bust! There's chaos at hand as Melissa comes back with that guitar she always wished she had brought in the first place! RENEE Hold on! Someone stop her! But before the officials can reach her, Melissa bashes the guitar across the back of Cassidy's head! "BBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" KRISTA Booooo? Chant bullshit, because that's what that is! Melissa puts the bad mouth to Cassidy, which mostly consists of damning her to hell. Though when she notices Cassidy is stirring tonight's sermon comes to a close and Melissa sprints backstage. Just barely fast enough as Cassidy is on her, welding the remnants of the instrument like a serrated edge blade! KRISTA The Jesus freak might get stabbed to death. To quote Ice Cube, today was a good day. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 12: Cassidy Maguire ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE So we're down to seven Hotties! Jade is fucking Biffman so hard and bouncing down her super powered ass so wildly she's knocking him off balance...and he's lying down! JADE Holy phat ass white girls, Biffman! The penultimate PAWG fucks him bу imраling hеrѕеlf оn his сосk repetitively until she has his very body vibrating along with the bounce of her big ass and huge tities. The super hero grabs her her hiрѕ аnd thrusts upwards to smash hiѕ cock all thе wау in hеr phat white pussy. Jade is grinning a fucked silly type of grin, the type of grin normally reserved when she finds out she's getting an extra scoop of ice cream. Painbow slides his monstrous BBC сосk in the queen of black cock, Annagret's, with her anal ring clamping down ѕо tight it rides thе ridgеѕ of his сосk tо the роint it lооks distended оn thе оut ѕtrоkе аnd indеntеd оn the in ѕtrоkе, Annagret looks back and witness the same thing as the horny audience. ANNAGRET Damn flood my ass with cum, daddy! The sweet sleeve of tight Annagret ass is doing the job, working over Painbow's rock hard shaft as tight as a handjob could! Speaking of handjobs, Bedorck is on the scene and plants his dick right in Annagret's hands! ANNAGRET Ahhh! White guy! RAAAAAAPPPPPEEEE! MAYA Be a pal, Annagret, most of the women he had sex with had more hair than Sloppy Joe. ANNAGRET You've got such a good heart, baby. Okay, Bedrock, you get a handjob just this once. Insert Annagret 9fuck black white Malaysia is spit roasted between The Golden Grrr, yes that Golden Grrr, and Quentin Benjamin. Big black dicks bear down with synchronized force, to let the dominatrix have a serious reaming, generating a strong reaction as she gives it right back. Her tatted up tits bounce underneath as she's forward and back, along with yelping, shaking and writhing, tossing my bob around, soon feeling an orgasm expanding! KRISTA She's gonna...she's gonna...she's gonna...CUMMMM! Krista McMahon has the right of this fucking, when Malaysia cums she involuntary stops sucking and throws her head back! She pushes back just as QB1 gives her a strong finish pumping her full of his seed while Chick douses her hooters with chicken feed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 13th: Malaysia Nerdly ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bobbi is left to the kindness of Mathis Golden and Brock Ausstin, which isn't any sort of kindness at all as the weapon of ass destruction of Brock's tears apart her shitpipe and Golden's golden gun decks her inner walls with balls of precum. Bobbi's asshole hell her whole body cracks with burning penetration. The two men are animalistic and destructive in beating the hell out of Bobbi's holes. Her body rocks and rolls like a ship caught in the perfect storm as her mouth blubbers utter nonsense. RENEE She's getting it so hard she's speaking pig Latin! KRISTA Obbay gonna ummay! December is jerking off Piercey D as Bad Ol JR mounts her from the behind. The party boys high five with Riggs establishing a wonderful rhythm inside Sleeping Beauty. The fuck is smooth and oh so glorious word to Bobby Roode, hitting a g spot that keeps December very much wide awake and elevated into a hot sexy trance! DECEMBER Whee. Sex is good. KRISTA I couldn't agree more, my lazy unmotivated friend. Sex is great for Cinnamon thanks to the double vag stuffing by Heroes United, so great that she expels their dicks with a violent orgasm full of squirting greatness! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 14: Cinnamon Spoons ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE No SluttyMania main event this year for Cinnamon, now it's off to take a nice shower. KRISTA I would join her, but my journalistic integrity says to stay right here. Warthog remains glued to Maya's pussy, and the horniest slut in town is just fine to ride the night away on his black man meat. Warthog is willing to share the skank's love and that's why Piercey D is able to give stroke after stroke into her asshole. The duo go in with hard pumping, Maya sent bouncing up and down up and down by the huge dicks lodged inside her fuckable body! MAYA Whooo hoooo shove that dick in me, Warthog! PIERCE Niece-bro? MAYA Oh yeah you're here too, Uncle Pierce. PIERCE December's pussy is bouncing around CW's cock, gushing sweet nectar all over the ladies man's big schlong! Nat Black is right there in her asshole pumping the entire shaft from just the tip down to his balls! December continues to coat Christian's pecker in slimy, bubbly cream as the squishy sounds of her being double fucked are heard in HD sound! Drenched penis dives inside the lazy slut touching dick that is reaming out her shit pipe KRISTA As my daughter would say...whoo hooo! I would raise a glass to this dicking but the courts said I can't drink. Speaking of daughters Jade is also taking a dp, the Booty Mama getting that fine ass torn up by Chick and her pussy slammed by Joey The Rat! Chick grabs her waist and with his face sucks one of her tig ol bitties as he simultaneously thrusts up into her voluptuous bod. As Joey goes into her cunt, the slamming causes her buttocks to ripple from the incredible impact and the beautiful blonde screams in passion. She bellows over and over again from the feeling of dicks buried deep inside her until she can take no more! JADE EEEP! EEEP! EEEP! THESE BIG DICKS ARE MAKING ME CUM! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 15: Jade Rodez Duncan ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ KRISTA The court also told me I shouldn't commit acts of incest but after seeing that what does the legal system know? RENEE No comment there, none whatsoever. But we are down to an all Sunray final four of Bobbi, Annagret, Maya and December! The fans give it up for the final four Hotties, who embody that term in every last sense of the word. But more specifically they embody the word whore, and none of these whores are going to cum without taking one hell of a drilling in all the holes they have. DP, triple penetration, double vag, these sluts are ready to rock n roll n fuck they're way to SluttyMania 3! KRISTA You all may see too few Hotties and too many dicks, but a true blue skank like me sees double anal galore! RENEE Yikes! Well we don't see double anal as Krista promised, but we do see Vinny Valentine pushing his disco dick into Maya's asshole with Bifffman plundering her sweet pussy. The former tag team partners don't seem like they need much to cum in this hot ass teenage babe, but somehow continue to pound away at her holes rather than unleash loads of jizz into her the jizz lover. BIFFMAN Citizen Vinny, we ride again! MAYA Uh, it'd be better if you not talk. Thanks. Bobbi is in one interesting and mega hot position, elevated and pinned by Daisuke from behind and Nathaniel Black from the front. Bobbi feels more than just a pair of glorious dicks, she also feels the ethereal heat burning off the studs instead de her. She can feel the need for their release radiating inside her naughty holes, but to their credit they also manage not to fill their girl up with spunk. But Bobbi demands sperm! Demands it! BOBBI Splooge inside me, you big weiner idiots! These big weiners give Bobbi plenty of that steaming splooge, ejaculating in unison. White nectar spills out Bobbi's cunt and butt and with the river of jizz flowing through her Bobbi announces... BOBBI Holy jumping, I'm cumming! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 16: Bobbi Cheesecake ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE Bobbi is out! KRISTA I'm proud of her. She went out like a true whore, coiencedently that's what her uncle is. Annagret is back in black dick el dorado as she tries to win her first Bang. Moses Robinson achieves the pinnacle of interracial sex as he spleunks his dick in Annagret's tight white ass. Bellow him Flynn Stevens' dick rages into her cunny, going up and pushing past her worn cervix. Annagret is blessed with a ferocious lust that leads her to start making out with Flynn! KRISTA A kiss in a dp. It's Nora Roberts meets Evil Angel. Warthog just can't leave Maya alone! And can you blame him?! The Slaughterhouse dude has his steely hard rod still buried in the cum princess' snatch. But other black dudes get the benefit of the dirty teen's skills as Kwahi Erving and Painbow of TMW get their black beasts jerked off. But its Warthog that's really dominating here, the heady scent of his arousal filling her nostrils above all else! MAYA I never knew burger flippers could give such good dick! I gotta cut my vegan diet and head to N and Out burger. KRISTA Sacrilege! I can't brag to my friends about a..a..a...meat eater! December is getting hard from all comers and cummers as Heavy D lets loose a stream of jizz that falls into her chocolate locks, decorating them a pale white. Still lasting in her asshole for that mythical double anal Krista promised are Slime and Jojo Whoa. This matched pair has lust in their eyes as their dicks combine to devour December's asshole! DECEMBER I never knew I could take two dicks in my ass. I discovered something. I'm a scientist. Yay. KRISTA If a woman who believes the earth is 6000 years old can lead children's education surely December can be a scientist. Maya is now the total property of Warthog, hooked in his arms as her ass gets a big time fucking from his big time dick! The Fuckslut From Hell lets out a high pitched anamlistic growl feeling the powerful pressure, pleasure and pain from the massive anal assault upon her. She sucks in air and her eyes water, the roughness of his fucking the savageness of his desire driving her wild. MAYA I'm gonna cum! I'm gonna cum! I'm cumming! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated 17th: Maya Duncan-Blanchard ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE Krista, one of Annagret or December will mainevent SluttyMania! KRISTA It was supposed to be Maya. I'm gonna have to have a fist to face meeting with the booking staff. Annagret and December are in their element, making their second appearance a piece in the final two. The Sunrays are under a deluge of penis, some might say they're eclipsed by it! As soon as one stud cums in them or on them another dick takes their place. The sluts soon lose track of who's fucked them, who's sperm is on them and even who's dick is inside them at the moment. In this breathless confusion of whoring and sex the two babes let out a unified scream... ANNAGRET & DECEMBER I'M CUMMING! DING DING DING KRISTA Uh, no. Two officials, Val Venis and Nunzio, converge on the worn down pair but much to the shock of the world Val raises December hands while Nunzio raises Annagret's hand! DECEMBER Yay, we're twins. ANNAGRET Ugh, are you telling me we both came at the same time?! Val seems to say December came last but Nunzio insists that Annagret came last. When extra officials arrive it only adds to confusion as they can't agree who came first! RENEE Fans, tune- KRISTA Don't you dare say tune into HeldDown for the resolution. RENEE Tune in to HeldDown for the resolution! KRISTA Fuck you. RENEE SLUTTYMANIA 3: OPEN WIDER LIVE FROM LOS ANGELES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 21, 2017 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2017 *** Trios Title: The X.F.L., Mathis Golden & Brock Ausstin w/ Rick Heyross vs. The 3 Amigos © *** Initially THE PLAYMAKERS accompanied their All XFL Team-mates ringside but got sent back to the locker room by the Xavier because he didn't want anybody "piggybacking off our glory." RENEE Are you kidding me?! COACH Given their recent play Xavier obviously feels Moss and Benjamin need to be sent a message. Who can forget their Anderson Cup choke job a few weeks ago? RENEE Clearly not Xavier. COACH And who can blame him? He basically gifted The Playmakers a deep Anderson Cup run and they fumbled. Then following the loss they shake hands with the guys they just went to war with! RENEE It's called sportsmanship. COACH Not according to Xavier. To him that's a losers mentality. In a shock to no one, the size and strength of the All XFL Team gave the champs problems. At one point Mathis and Brock tossed Mariachi around like a football and "spiked" him face-first into the top turnbuckle via Snake Eyes. HEYROSS But the 3 Amigos successfully managed to use their speed against their bigger opponents. A quick strike attack/combo offense that had the All XFL Team on its heels until Xavier turned everything around with a well placed Yakuza kick, sending Mariachi Thru the Upright for 3 as the flaming luchador attempted a springboard hurricarana! COACH Good thing Mariachi wears a mask, that way nobody can tell how much uglier he got after that shot to the face! Chick broke up the ensuing pinned and then all hell broke loose as Brock and Mathis confronted the last Amigos standing. Despite the size disadvantage Chick and Juicy refused to be intimidated, taking the fight right to their foes. The action spilled outside as Xavier signaled for THE LONG BOMB... but a being as lightweight as Mariachi meant incredible high time, so as Mariachi spun in the air he managed to NAB XAIVER AROUND THE NECK and spike him with a HURRICARANA for the 1-2-3!!! XAVIER Winners: The 3 Amigos, via pinfall. Disbelief on one side, jubilee on the other as the 3 Amigos celebrated their win. RENEE Never underestimate the heart of a champion! THE PODCAST IS HERE~! THA PUERTO RICAN SPEAKS WITH TYLER BRYANT. LIVE AFTER ANGLEPALOOZA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 21, 2017 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2017 *** OAOAST World Title: Spencer Reiger w/ Gloss Angieacola vs. Tyler Bryant © w/ Lorelei DeCenzo & THE FLEX *** COACH More than just the OAOAST Championship is on the line for Tyler Bryant, so is a place in the record books as the longest reigning OAOAST World Champion of all time, a title he currently shares with OAOAST legend Drek Stone at 9 months. RENEE Let's not forget tonight was supposed to be Blaine Cayley's shot at the gold, which he earned the right to receive after winning The Challenge: Singled Out* last summer. *Along with the $500,000 grand prize, a Money in the Bank contract (originally won by THE FLEX at AngleMania XV) was also awarded to the winner thanks to Lorelei DeCenzo's big mouth. COACH Instead, just weeks after rumors of a bounty had spread, Blaine was mysteriously attacked at the 2017 OAOAST New Year's Spectacular. RENEE And then Tyler and company collected the bounty! COACH Somebody had to take the damn money. Nobody else stepped forward to claim it. Besides, they donated the money to charitable cause in the Philippines! RENEE Riiiight. Anyway, with Blaine sidelined by post-concussion syndrome, a new challenger was needed. So Spencer Reiger stepped to the plate seeking to avenge his friend. COACH After backstabbing him most likely. Not judging. I'd do it to for a World title shot. RENEE You're confusing Spencer Reiger wih Baron Windels when it comes to backstabbing. But what better way to get back at Tyler than by taking what he cherishes most: the OAOAST World Title. The action was fast and furious early. Both men going 100 MPH. But it's what happened late that will leave the OAOAST Galaxy talking as Lorelei distracted the ref (and Gloss after she rushed over) so that THE FLEX could sneak inside to assist Tyler... only for Spencer to take him down with a REIGER COUNTER! COACH AAH! RENEE Serves Flex right trying to interfere! Unfortunately for Spencer, after kicking Flex out of the ring he walked right into Tyler's 0-100 TKO for a nearfall! TYLER Tyler's expression said it all. No way Spencer could've possibly kicked out, so he complained to the ref about a slow count. While that happened Gloss slipped the WORLD TITLE to Spencer (which went undetected by the ref since he was busy telling Lorelei and Flex, who joined Tyler in protest, to quit whining). COACH Wait a minute! Clutching the title, Spencer gave it a good hard look... then tossed it away! GLOSS Spencer's message was clear: I want to win my way. Unfortunately Spencer was still groggy from the 0-100 from moments prior, enabling Tyler to block a Reiger Counter and surprise Spencer with another 0-100 (TKO) to retain the title. Winner: Tyler Bryant, via pinfall. Gloss could only shake her head in disappointment. Meanwhile, the champ and company were on cloud 9. COACH Cheers to the longest reigning champion in OAOAST history... Tyler Bryant! ANGLEMANIA 3000 COMING IN APRIL Back LIVE!, the celebration continued for Tyler Bryant and company. The champagne is popped but only Tyler and Lorelei enjoy the bubbly as THE FLEX still has to compete in the Lethal Rumble. LORELEI You did it, baby! The record is all yours! TYLER That isn't the only thing that is all mine tonight! *pulls in Lorelei for a hug* LORELEI Oh! TYLER So let's get this party started! I'm ready to hit more than the town! Big man, I know you can handle the rest of the night without me. I'll see you at the club later. THE FLEX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 21, 2017 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2017 es for Gory Dragan as he faces daunting odds in his second Lethal Rumble. BUFFER From Veronia, Oregon he is THE BLACK DRAGON...GORRRYY DRRRAAGGGONN!! "YYYEEEAAAAA" Gory busts out some smooth MJ style dance moves before sliding into the ring and waving on the next 29 foes! BUFFER And entrant number two... We're riding down the boulevard We're riding into the dark night, night With half the tank and empty heart Pretending we're in love, when it's never enough As the silence filled the lonely air Oh, they can hear now now now baby We see a storm is closing in, Pretending we're escaping Don't say a word while we danced with the devil You brought the fire to a world so cold We're out of time on the highway to never Hold on (hold on), hold on (hold on) Don't say a word while we danced with the devil You brought the fire to a world so cold We're out of time on the highway to neverHold on (hold on), hold on (hold on) One of this narrators fav songs "Ocean Drive" smoothly rolls into the arena but the fans are full of hatred for the duo of Phecda and Al Houd who proudly show off their "With The Band" PYM t shirts. RENEE They're both here, but who's gonna be in the match? BUFFER From Chocklow Poland, he is THE SHINING ONE...PHHHECCDDAAAA! "BBBBBOOOOOOOO!" COACH This dude is a former bodybuilder one of the strongest dudes in the contest. If he got the stamina he could go far. Phecda enters the ring and showcases his mighty muscles as he removes his top. DING DING DING Gory swarms his foe with punches and kicks to start! Full if energy the former 24/7 champion hits the ropes but when he comes back Phecda tries to toss him over the ropes! Lucky Gory is able to slide under the ropes instead! But he comes up against Al Houd who slings him into the guardrail! "BBBBBOOOOOOOO!" the DC fans hiss. AL HOUD All for Melissa. RENEE That makes it okay?! Gory is tossed into the ring, where his elimination should be easy. But when Phecda starts to pitch him over Gory counters with a springboard face crusher! COACH Moves like that will take a lot out of you. Suddenly Al Houd enters the ring and shoulder blocks Gory! As he and Phecda stomp their foe, the countdown begins.. TEN NINE EIGHT SEVEN SIX FIVE FOUR THREE TWO ONE BZZZZZZTTTT Cigarettes and tiny liquor bottles Just what you'd expect inside her new Balenciaga Vile romance, turned dreams into an empire Self-made success now she rolls with Rockefellers Survival of the richest, the city's ours until the fall They're Monaco and Hamptons-bound but we don't feel like outsiders at all We are the new Americana High on legal marijuana Raised on Biggie and Nirvana We are the new Americana As "New Americana" plays to cheers and applause the refined Coco Chanel sprints to the ring. COACH Gory fucked, this dude hates him. But Coco comes in and strikes Al Houd with a high knee! RENEE Or maybe not! Phecda grunts his anger and takes a swing at Coco. But the LA native ducks the attack and back suplexes him out the match! "YYYYYEEEAAAAA!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ELIMINATED: Phecda Eliminated by: Coco Chanel Entered: 2nd Eliminated: 1st Eliminations: None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ GORY Thanks, pal. COCO Stop talking. Coco stomps at Gory then shoots him into the posts before hammering him with a drop kick! Gory slumps over and Coco goes to the center of the ring to wave him up. Gory does get up but is able to duck a lariat from his former TMW rival! From there Gory shocks just about everyone with a sliced bread into a face crusher! RENEE Red Sky Warning! Coco stumbles upright but isn't about to get thrown over as she elbows Gory back then wallops him with a spinning wheel kick! Lucky again Gory falls through the ropes rather than over! RENEE Gory was born under a lucky star! The Black Dragon latches onto Coco and tries to suplex him out the ring. But Coco is too strong for that and suplexes him back into the ring! The countdown then starts and when it finishes we hear... "YA'LL NIGGAS GOT ME HIGH" The DC fans put out huge cheers as Pimp Magic Lucius Soul sheds his pimp robe and heads to the ring. And now it's time to SYN! Soul formed a brief team to take out Gory, but the Oregon native avoided their schemes and then took them both down with diving laraits! Soul, though, got up quicker than Coco and hit a roundhouse that knocked Gory into the ropes. But Gory returned fire with a school boy into a superkick! RENEE Evidence on Fire! Everyone was in recovery mode as the ten count came on to summon... And our people talk to me, but nothing ever hits, So people talk to me, and all the voices just burn holes. I’m going in (ooh) This is the start of how it all ever ends They used to shout my name, now they whisper it I’m speeding up and this is the Red, orange, yellow flicker beat sparking up my heart We rip the start, the colors disappear I never watch the stars there’s so much down here So I just try to keep up with them Red, orange, yellow flicker beat sparking up my heart "Yellow Flicker Beat" played and the entrance doors parted to bring out Silver! Anglesault's nephew discarded his cape and clapped his hands as he sped to the ring! RENEE A former Anglemania maineventer! Silver ducked a spin kick from Soul then forever the New Orelans native to eat a tornado DDT! The Menagerie member then joined forces with Gory in pitching Soul over the ropes! But in the end Soul was able to land on the ring apron to avoid dismissal. RENEE Silver and Gory that's a freaky pair. COACH A whole lot of crazy! Silver and Gory equals half Euphoria on the crazy scale. Coco stormed through both loons with a lariat, then proceeded to isolate Silver in the corner. GORY I got you buddy! The buddy Gory had was Coco as they joined forces to try and take out Silver. But the Brooklyn native backed them away and hit a crossbody right before the countdown came and played.... (Cause I ain't goin out like a sucker, no way I'm nice right now, I, I feel good If you have a drink, would you please put it in the air) That party last night was awfully crazy I wish we taped it I danced my ass off and had this one girl completely naked Drink my beer and smoke my weed But my good friends is all I need Pass out at three, wake up at 10 Go out to eat, then do it again, man I love college.. "I Love College" plays to warm and welcome cheers as Chad Mustard arrives on scene sipping out a bright red cup and sporting University of Maryland themed tights! CHAD HEEEEYYYYY! "HHEEEEYYYYYYYYYY!" the fans cheer, many of whom have fondness for the University of Maryland right up 95 or route 1 if you prefer the scenic pain in the ass route! RENEE Chad won a six person elimination match in TMW, last eliminating Rex to get this incredible opportunity! But he's a got a long road ahead with his number six entry. "DO SOMETHING CRAZY! DO SOMETHING CRAZY! DO SOMETHING CRAZY!" The almost hometown fans chanted to Chad, and he sure did as he entered with a springboard Swanton to Coco! "YYYYEEEAAAAAA!" Chad met bad soon as Soul tried to Go To Sleep him out his match! But the college bro escaped and nearly tossed Soul out the ring, and would have if Soul didn't skin the cat back in! Pimp Magic then tried his finisher again, but Chad countered with a stunner! RENEE Doing it for the biracial God, Derek Jeter! Meanwhile Coco whipped Gory into the ropes and wanted to back drop him out the ring. But Gory countered that plan and hit his foe with a running DDT! The Black Dragon then took a risk by going up top, which didn't pay off as Silver crotched him! But when he pushed him off Gory managed to jump back and land on his feet on the steps! COACH Damn imagine if Sophie said we don't need steps there. The countdown returned and the fans got hyped, that is until this played... Tearing me apart with words you wouldn't say, And suddenly tomorrow's a moment washed away. 'Cause I don't have a reason, and you don't have the time, But we both keep on waiting for something we won't find. The light on the horizon was brighter yesterday, With shadows floating over, the scars begin to fade. We said it was forever but then it slipped away, Standing at the end of the final masquerade.The final masquerade! The King himself, King Landon Maddix emerged for yet another rumble with Ser Felix Strutter ready to praise him to the world... SER FELIX All rise for Landon of House Maddix, first of his name, King of all rumbles, King of Spain, and King of the OAOAST! “BBBBBBOOOOOOOO!” RENEE King of rumbles? Well he has won a lot that's for sure. King Landon entered with pomp and grace, but had to fend off Conan right away. The stronger of the two, Coco kept King Landon on the defensive and almost eliminated him with a dropkick! Luckily for all the commoners in Spain Landon didn't quite get over the ropes and instead fell back to the mat! COACH There ya go, your grace, keep it up! RENEE Keep getting your butt whipped? Elsewhere Silver grabbed hold of Gory and tried to nail him with an AngleSlam! But young Gory slipped out the hold, but carried himself into a Lucius Soul Go2Sleep that left him out on his feet and easily lariated over the ropes by Chad! ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Gory Dragan Entered 1st Eliminated 2nd Eliminated by Chad Mustard Eliminations: none ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE Talk about a group effort! So much for friendship as Soul kicked Chad in the gut then tried to pitch him over the ropes! But Chad blocked it and then hit a stun gun that at least allowed him to lariat Soul onto the apron! CHAD I just want to say I watched the documentary American Pimp six times and I understand and love pimping culture. SOUL You a weird white boy! The countdown rolled ending when "Ecstasy of Gold" hit! Boos were plentiful and loud and passionate, but Baron Windels ignored them as he shed his orange vest and charged to the ring! RENEE I almost wanna turn my back on him. Baron Windels coming in at number eight. A whole punch of people ate Texas sized right hands from big BW, and poor Chad of course had to suffer through a Devll's Addiction fallaway slam! As he stood tall, BW tossed up the bullhorns! "SELLOUT! SELLOUT! SELLOUT!" Meanwhile the champ enjoyed watching this backstage with Lorelei and a draft beer. COACH You earned that drink, superstar! In the ring King Landon was lighting up Coco with forearms, until Coco had enough and smashed his head against the ring posts! The King was thrown for a loop and summarily got himself flapjacked out the match! "YYYYYEEEAAAAAAH!" COACH King Landon! How the hell did that happen?! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: King Landon Entered 7th Eliminated 3rd Eliminated by Coco Chanel Eliminations: none ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Elsewhere Chad was trapped in the contour by Baron... CHAD Let's just say my brother's shrine to Dwight Yokum and the sex slaves he inducted into it make me adequately able to deal with this situation! Low blow by Chad! Chad then got help from Silver, but both men weren't strong to handle the big San Antonio native who proceeded to steamroll them with double shoulder blocks! Soul then tried his hand with a running crossbody, but Baron got him and tried to use a fall forward slam to rid the match of him! Luckily the fan favorite fell on the apron to avoid an elimination! The countdown returns and the fans count along. The buzzer sounds and then... Don't Hurt MeDon't Hurt Me Eminem and Lil Wayne's No Love plays and out comes a larger than your average luchadore luchadore! The man pulls aside a shiny dark blue cape, pounds his fist and then jogs to the ring! RENEE Wow! It's Abacus from ARRIBA at number nine! A legend that's put his mask on the line 8 times and never lost. COACH Dude is incredible, watch him in action. Abacus impressed the crowd as he sprung into the ring off the ropes and hit Conan with a head scissors! He then showed off power as he threw Chad down with a gut wrench suplex, then knocked the wind out him with a splash! RENEE Tons of talent in the ring, including the legend Abacus and much more to come! Abacus tries to send Silver out of the ring with the force of an atomic drop, but Silver only bounced into the ropes, and thwarted Abacus with a super fast spinning heel kick! SILVER Hiding your true face behind a mask, it's the mark of hopeless misery. I'll rescue you. Silver did try to peel the mask off his foe, Abacus fought him off then drilled him with a tombstone! The legend then got fancy as he arm wrenched Chad, and held onto it as he went up top. But in her high rent district he got evicted as Chad managed to shove him outside! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Abacus Entered 9th Eliminated by Chad Mustard Eliminated 4th Eliminations: none ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ CHAD That ones for you, Jetes. Now I gotta air out my scrot. RENEE His what? As Chad got talked out of showing off his scrotum by the officials, the countdown worked and resulted in.... Oh, what a cold, dark world it is to walk through Alone with a fear-filled head Thinking of losing you is a haunted song And a dread much worse than the fear of death Cheers were abundant as Oscar Friberg made his return to in ring action! The beloved baby face nodded his head and pointed to the fans before taking off his tank top and charging to the ring! RENEE Ozzie suffered some injuries in his match last year against Alexander The Magnificent, but he's all ready to take his shot and get a crack at his old rival Tyler! Oscar entered the match and traded chops and forearms right away with Conan. The LA native sent his foe into the ropes but Oscar rocked him with a high flipping lariat. Baron thought he might be off balance and immediately tried to press Oscar out the ring! COACH So much for taking a crack at Tyler. But Oscar escaped down the back and spun Baron around to him with a codebreaker! BW was out on his feet, so Oscar rocked him with a dropkick that sent him tumbling over the ropes! Just barely was Baron able to hang onto the ropes and keep his AngleMania dreams alive! RENEE That was the closest call yet! Soul still saw Baron as weak and sprung off the turnbuckles to try and catch him with a DDT that would have spiked him on the apron and probably knocked him out this match. But the San Antonio native caught his smaller foe and pitched him to the floor with a northern lights release suplex! ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Lucius Soul Entered 4th Eliminated 5th Eliminated by Baron Windels Eliminations: None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH Night nighty, ashy nigga! RENEE So right now Silver and Coco Chanel have been in the match the longest. Followed by Chad. The countdown resumes once more, finishing up after ten... I look and stare so deep in your eyes, I touch on you more and more every time, When you leave I'm begging you not to go, Call your name two or three times in a row, Such a funny thing for me to try to explain, How I'm feeling and my pride is the one to blame. 'Cuz I know I don't understand, Just how your love can do what no one else can. The pop is huge with "Crazy In Love" playing but Molly and Simon have cold hearts as Simon point to Baron and rushes to the ring! BARON Come get some! Simon slid into the ring and got pounced on by BW. But Agent 009 fought upright and kicked The Living Daylights out of Baron with a crescent kick! "SIMON! SIMON! SIMON!" RENEE Ned has to be backstage celebrating that kick. Baron scrambled upright and got tagged with a series of punches that left him laid out, and then Simon stomped a mudhole in him and walked it dry! "YYYEEEEAAAAAAH!" Elsewhere Chad tried to strike up a parter ship with Coco based on... CHAD Dude, we're both white, handsome, rich and I assume ass hair free. COCO Stop talking. CHAD Is ass hair a touchy subject? My bad, dude. Behind them Oscar and Silver fought it out with Silver grabbing onto Oscar's hair and trying to pitch him out the ring. But The Freebird blocked the attack and himself tried to body slam Silver over the ropes, failing when Silver escaped down the back. As the combatants continued to fight, the clock counted down and brought us... Because I was born this way I got lightning running thru my veins Ain't nobody gonna stop this train So hop on board, or get out the way Because I was born this way I got lightning running thru my veins Ain't nobody gonna stop this train You can't stop us, we can't be stopped As "Born This Way" hit the fans rose to their feet and let the glittering chap wearing cowboy hear their disgust with him. But The Cocky Prick gives them the middle finger as he charges to the ring! RENEE Number 12 is backup for Baron looks like. COACH Hard up! RENEE Ewww! Yes it is as the second Jock hit the ring he proceeded to pitch Simon over the ropes and rid him from Baron's life and the rumble! "BBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Simon Singleton Eliminated 6th Entered 11th Eliminated by Mister Dick Eliminations: none ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mister Dick made sure Baron was ok then went over to Silver and tossed him out the ring! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Silver Eliminated 7th Entered 5th Eliminated by Mister Dick Eliminations: none ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jock comes back to Baron and gives him a high five and a pat on the back. "FUCK THE GUNSLINGERS! FUCK THE GUNSLINGERS! FUCK THR GUNSLINGERS!" Baron gets in on the eliminating action and lariats Chad Mustard right out the ring! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Chad Mustard Eliminated 8th Entered 6th Eliminated by Baron Windels Eliminations: Gory Dragan, Abacus ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Mister Dick took in Conan as Baron choked Oscar in the corner and down came da count.... Fuck bitch on BET Have her walkin', she fuckin' for BET Wildin' for wallet Kill everybody walkin' He knows that his soul in the furnace Tiimmy, Tiimmy, Tiimmy Turner He was wishin' for a burner To kill everybody walkin' He knows that his soul in the furnace Fuck bitch on BET Have her walkin', she fuckin' for BET Wildin' for wallet Kill everybody walkin' He knows that his soul in the furnace Tiimmy, Tiimmy, Tiimmy Turner The mumble rap of Timmy Turner sounds out giving a haunting and evil feeling. And the broken surcoat clad US champion arrives to give an even worse feeling to the world. RENEE Number 13 is Lord Alearys Chance the Exile and the sight of him just sickens me. But he could be facing Tyler Bryant at AngleMania 3000. The US champion surveyed the scene just a bit before sliding into the ring and poking Jock in the eye! LORD AC Coco, lets you and I put differences aside and get this man out the ring. What say you? CONAN Stop talking. Conan hit AC with a right cross... "STOP!" And an uppercut! "TALKING!" The fans scream RENEE Conan has been in this match longer than anyone, and he's got the Galaxy solidly behind him. COACH DC loves powerful men. Elsewhere Baron starts to force Oscar over the ropes, when suddenly Oscar hauls him to the mat with an arm bar! "YYYYYYYEEAAAAA!" RENEE Crowbar! Baron reached the ropes, but Oscar wouldn't break , so Jock had to stomp away at him and end the deadly submission himself. RENEE It really helps to have someone to watch your back in a match when you normally can't trust a single person. On goes the countdown the nations capital counting down and then bzzzzz! Pretty mind, silk thoughtsStart a fire when you turn the lights offOh my, my GodWhen he made you, he did a fine job Lancel Locke grabs his crotch and then with that same hand high fives fans on the way to the ring. COACH You used to be in food service! Nasty nigga. Baron and Jock think they have easy pickings, but Lancel ducked a double lariat then tagged th duo with a pair of dropkicks! "YYYYEEEEAAAAAA!" Lancel pumped himself up and the crowd but Lord AC slithered behind him... LORD AC Ah, my old friend. Let's get reacquainted with one another, shall we. To AC that meant trying to pitch him over the ropes, but the mega hot stud countered with a sliced bread into a reverse X factor! Lancel then took a risk by going up top, but it paid off as he was able to hit Boom or Bust on AC! "YYYYYEEAAAAAAA!" COACH Cornette needs to come tell this kid how to work, all this floppy flip shit. RENEE And DC loves it! Lancel squared off against Oscar in a battle of the fan favorites. Or what would have been if Baron and Jock hadn't come to clobber them with forearms and stomps! "STEERS AND QUEERS! "STEERS AND QUEERS! "STEERS AND QUEERS!" MISTER DICK Its a new America, you can steer your queer asses into any dick you want! "BBBBBOOOOOOO!" The crowd turned their attention from Jock to the returning countdown... Sun's always falling Weightless and free Now when you close your eyesJust breathe, breathe with me RENEE Uh oh. Uh oh is right, as from the entryway stood a three piece suited up Teddy Buckworth wearing a smile with all the warmth of the Arctic Ocean. And with that smile and with that suit, so did The Billion Dollar Vampire travel to the ring. COACH Awww shit, Mister Buckworth gonna wrestle in a suit! Teddy enters the ring to much wrath of the fans, but welcomes cousin Coco with a smile and a wink, both of which come singed with acid. But Coco still trusted his cousin and that proved to be his downfall as Teddy tossed him out the ring and never gave him a second look, which the world champ finds hilarious as he watches backstage with Lori. ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Coco Chanel Entered 3rd Eliminated 10 Eliminated by Teddy Buckworth Eliminations: Phecda, King Landon ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE! ASSHOLE!" BUCKWORTH My apologies would you prefer I bring him back? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 21, 2017 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2017 RENEE He is an a-hole! COACH Mister Buckworth is back in fine form! Mister Dick and Baron overwhelm Teddy and whipped him to the ropes only for him to hit a diving shoulder tackle on Baron, while Lancel cracked Jock with a basement dropkick. Jock was stunned as he got up and got spun about with a spinning head scissors from Lancel that dumped him over the ropes! But he came down on the apron to avoid disaster. “BBBBBBOOOOOOOOO!” COACH You know these idiots would pop if Jock won the rumble again. RENEE I doubt that! AC went after Oscar, but got pulled down with a Crowbar to pop the crowd! But as you can't eliminaye a guy with a submission, Oscar broke the hold shortly enough and went after the US champion with stomps. As everyone fought and the champion watched backstage the countdown hit and finally we got... This is survival of the fittest This is do or die This is the winner takes it all So take it all “Survival” by Eminem hit and the fans got on their feet! Tossing aside his silver vest, Ned Blanchard charged to the ring as Baron Windels got set to fight him! But, Buckworth was on his troll shit and started stomping away at him! RENEE Hey! COACH What's wrong with attacking someone in a rumble? RENEE Well, no one wants to see them fight! And they didn't have to for long as Ned pitched Teddy into the ring posts! The fans then popped as Ned proceeded to unleash holy hell on Baron! “FUCK HIM UP, NED! FUCK HIM UP! FUCK HIM UP, NED! FUCK HIM UP!” Mister Dick recovered to try and aid his partner, but KICK WHAM NEWPORT HAROR ENZIGURI and Jock was down! Then he had to suffer through Baron getting a drop toe hold onto his massive member! MISTER DICK AHHHHHH! “YYYYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Jock was pulled up by Ned and swiftly sent out of the ring! “YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Mister Dick Eliminated by: Ned Blanchard Eliminated 11th Entered 12th Eliminations: Silver, Simon Singleton ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE Wow! What an awesome run by Ned Blanchard, Coach. COACH All that energy wasted. Typical Ned. Ned found himself trading blows with BW once more, but then Oscar and Lancel got into the mix and the former friends and partners were seperated. Backstage, the champion watched while Lorelei whispered something in his ear. COACH Some scouting by the champion and the champion maker. RENEE That's one of Lorelei's strengths. She's a really sharp mind. The countdown plays with the fans counting along, until they hear.... I never go away No I never go away This is everything Is Everything Everything I never run away No I never run away This is everything To me Then they lose their shit! RENEE Wait! Is it really him? Is it?! Is it?! Yes, yes it is! Tristan Nystrom stands in an OAOAST arena for the first time in months, proud and beautiful yet oh so somber and deadly. As his powerful music plays over the storming cheers, Tristan sheds his black coat and reveals a lean figure clad in pitch black attire. LORD AC My friend has arrived! Lovely! With the fans damn near worshiping him, Tristan strides down the ramp as he wears a sobering expression. RENEE Sophie kept this surprise under wraps, and listen to the fans. COACH I'm listening and I can barely hear you talk. They're going nuts! Tristan entered the ring to a smiling welcome from AC, who also had his hand extended. RENEE Really? Yes, really, Renee. But Tristan ain't playing this shit and walloped AC with a buzzaw kick that launched him out the ring!!! "YYYYYYYEEEEEAAAAA!" RENEE That is now called No Second Strike because after Tristan uses it he doesn't need a second strike. COACH And it just sent Lord AC out this bitch! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Lord Alerays Chance The Exile Eliminated by Tristan Nystrom Entered 13 Eliminated 12th Eliminations: no ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tristian hadn't come for the rumble, though. He came for AC and leaps over the ropes to go after him! ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Tristian Nystrom Eliminated by himself Entered 17th Eliminated 13th Eliminations: himself, Lord AC ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH He took himself out! Tristen snarls which is far from his usual expression as AC tries to escape! But the Cali native fails and Tristen rolls him onto the table. Attention though is not even diverted to the count down... Black ocean, cold and dark I am the hungry shark, fast and merciless But the only girl that could talk to him just couldn't swim Tell me what's worse than this And it echoes in the halls They danced along the walls The memories of your ghost You are the one that I used to love And I'm still in love, but I've never loved you the most I've seen better days So unafraid in my youth I can't breathe, much less believe "Lydia" plays and the iceman himself, Northstar enters at 18, tosses away his cape and jogs to the battle! COACH There we go! Help ya boy, Northstar! But! But! But Northstar just slides into the ring and begins trading blows with Oscar! RENEE Yikes! He's just gonna leave AC to get his butt beat? Well, can't say I blame him. COACH I blame him! AC gets put through the French announce desk with an electric chair driver!!! RENEE Gae Bolg! Through a table! Tristan shakes his head in disgust and walks off from the wreckage as Northstar pays him no mind! "TRISTAN! TRISTAN! TRSTAN!" Back to past tense! BW thought he might be able to lariat Ned over the ropes, but Ned got him with a Thez press to pop the crowd! But leaving his back exposed was a bad idea as Northstar picked Ned up and tried to pitch him over the ropes! Luckily Ned was able to come down on his back on the apron. COACH This dude Ned has to realize they other dudes besides Baron in the ring. Teddy tossed Lancel into the corner, but the popular baby face countered with a raised boot! Teddy staggered backwards and Lancel exploded with a running high knee, that Oscar followed up with a standing moonsault! RENEE Oscar and Baron have been in the match the longest. But, word to Aisling and Sabrina, they have no chill! Ned was busy trading punches with Northstar, when Lancel snapped off a dropkick to knock them both into the ropes! The pretty boy then tried to hit them with a double lariat but failed to knock them both over the ropes, which disappointed the champ backstage as he wanted Ned gone. As the men in the ring continued to do battle the countdown hit... WATCH OUT HERE I COME! Watch out, watch ya asses and ya vaginas! As Blaqk Audio's “You Spin Me Round” rocks and rolls into the arena the face painted wild man, Bi-Curious George skips into the arena! RENEE He may have been denied entry into the Lethal Bang, but the rep from SMUSH has his chance to show his stuff in the Lethal Rumble! BCG rushed into the ring and proceeded to give Ned a love tap on the ass! BLANCHARD Awww hell son! Blanchard took a swing at Ned, but BCG ducked it and gave him another love tap on the ass! Then he proceeded to rub Oscar's head, dubbing him the prettiest girl in the ball. OSCAR Awww hell son! Oscar also took a swing at BCG, but he actually landed his and knocked the SMUSH rep into the corner. But BCG showed his stuff by coming back and hitting Oscar with a high flipping lariat, then doing snow angels!!!! “YYYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAA!” COACH Shit, its better than him being in the Bang. Lancel went for a codebreaker on Baron, which turned out to be his downfall as Baron kept hold of him and dumped him out of the ring! “OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Lancel Locke Eliminated by Baron Windels Entered 14th Eliminated 14th Eliminations: None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Baron was again pounced on by Blanchard who hit him with another Thez Press! As BW got up, Ned proceeded to hit him with a reverse sidewalk slam! “YYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” RENEE California Here We Come! COACH Dropped that nigga right on his face! Down goes the count with the fans singing along and then BZZZZZZZT! THE DAY IS MY ENEMY! THE NIGHT MY FRIEND! “YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” COACH Shit bout to get real! Teddy has no snide remarks and prepared himself one hundred percent as he awaited for Colin's arrival. But Colin didn't come and we find out why as he was being stomped out backstage by all of The Menagerie! “BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!” BUCKWORTH Hahhaahha...hahahha....hhaha...BWAHAHAAHAHAA! COACH Love it when Mister Buckworth's plans come together! RENEE How can you say that?! Colin doesn't deserve that, no one deserves to miss their chance to compete at AngleMania! Backstage Tyler was quite happy that Colin has no chance to go to AM. RENEE What happened to wanting to face the best? Colin is one of the best. The show must go on and on it went as Oscar and BCG tried to get the big Texan Baron over the ropes. But, Baron made them eat a pair of Texas sized right hands which BCG found rude. BCG I just wanted to be friends, honey bunny! BW Kiss my ass! BCG With pleasure!!! BW had to run away as BCG really wanted to kiss his ass! In fact Baron had to escape all the way out of the ring! COACH Couldn't bring J-MAX back from SMUSH, couldn't bring Eggther back, had to call up Bi-Curious George. Inside the ring Ned and Teddy went at with Ned thinking he could suplex his former boss out of the ring. But Buckworth came down on his feet on the apron and hurried back into the ring to hammer Ned with a House of the rising Knee! “BBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOO!” the DC fans hiss as Buckworth makes a hissing sound like a Cobra to mock Ned. RENEE Ted's become the quite the comedian since joining The Menagerie. The countdown hits again and makes it to zero as we next hear... All a nigga want is some of that lip service All a nigga want is some of that lip service “BBBBBBOOOOOOO!” There is something to like as The Freakazoids arrived in boob revealing cut off “Get Freaky” t-shirts! They applaud their man, BPT has he stomped out with his Willy Wonka attire and a great chance of winning! RENEE Number twenty one, and Big Papa Thrust really could be maineventing AngleMania for the first time in his illustrious career! BPT slides into the ring and was greeted by BCG! BCG Your Bi-Curious Freakazoid welcomes you! But BPT didn't receive that welcome well as he went right through BCG with a lariat! BPT I ain't got time for a Freakazoid like you ya butt sucking bastard because yer a butt sucking bastard and I ain't got time for butt sucking bastards! RENEE Eloquently put! BPT's domiance didn't last long as Oscar surprised him by pulling him down with a Crowbar! “YYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!” But BPT is one strong SOB and hadn't much trouble in powering out of the hold! He lifted Oscar over his shoulder and tried to dump him out the ring, but the Dutch babyface rolled out the hold and hit an SOS on BPT! “YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAA!” RENEE The Early Bird Gets the Worm! Tyler didn't like that one bit backstage, as he has no desire to see Oscar at AngleMania. RENEE The way Tyler looks he probably wishes a Keyboard Warrior would win this match. The struggle continues as Buckworth tried to force BW over the ropes. However, Baron fell to the mat and avoided such a fate, continuing to survive. COACH Big Baron hanging in there, doing it for ol Jockie Boy. RENEE Ol Jockie Boy?! Most everyone just laid around for a bit, which makes my writing easier and means I can hustle on down to the next entrant! A boy of anguish now, he's a man of soul, Traded in his misery for the lonely life of the road. The years were cruel to him no, He won't let them go. Lays awake tryna' find the man inside to pack his bags and escape this world. “BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOO!” The fans of the nation's capital let Leon Rodez hear what he's been hearing for nearly nine years, nothing but pure unadulterated hatred. Leon returns the favor in kind with his classic scowl and hard stare. Teddy on the other hand is rather pleased to have an ally in the ring. RENEE At number twenty two can Leon Rodez win his first Lethal Rumble? What happens if it comes down to he and Teddy B? COACH The Galaxy will explode. RENEE Probably literally! Leon entered the ring where he's welcome by his ally Mister Buckworth. Though the two aren't a LSGS type pairing and quickly go their own way. Leon did battle with Lord Northstar as Buckworth and BCG traded punches. Though their fight doesn't last for long as BPT came and clobbered them both with forearms! COACH I don't know, I think Big Papa should have caught himself a break. BPT thought he might be able to use an Oklahmoma Slam on Teddy, but The Billion Dollar Vampire escaped down the back and proceeded to pitch BPT over the ropes and out the match! ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Big Papa Thrust Eliminated by Teddy Buckworth Entered 21st Eliminated 15th Eliminations: None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE Looks you were right, Coach. Big Papa Thrust got too into smacking people up. COACH As a fellow badass I understand, though. RENEE Uh-huh. In the corner Leon lit up Ned with knife edge chops, but Ned returned fire with chops of his own then turned them into wild punches, before knocking Leon into the ropes with a haymaker! Ned couldn't push Leon over the ropes as Leon drop toe held him onto the second rope then proceeded to hit a cannonball on his back! “OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!” The countdown was heard again and then replacing it was.... I can feel the animal insideMy resolve is weakeningPounding on the doors of my mindIts nearly overpoweringI cannot begin to describeThe hunger that I feel againRun if you intend to surviveFor the beast is coming to life Tyler was on his feet backstage cheering as he and everyone else watched THE FLEX carry his huge muscles to the ring! COACH Awww yeah! Number 23, the champ's muscle! RENEE More than his muscle, his cheat code. COACH Ain't nothing wrong with having some extra insurance. THE FLEX entered the ring and laid out everyone with clotheslines! THE FLEX FLEX SMASH! “BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!” People got back up but again FLEX tore through them with clotheslines! THE FLEX FLEX SMASH! AGAIN! “BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” The DC fans respond. The others were laid out as FLEX well flexed his muscles, in fact they were all laid out until we heard the count and got.... Time will destroy everything Time will destroy everything Time will destroy everything Time will destroy everything Oh, the world is rough It's just like hoping it will swallow you right up And know that you're awake The clock is ticking and it won't stop, it don't stop “YYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Cheers were many as “Time Will Destroy Everything” played and Ivar The Cunning, the thousand year old vampire sprinted to the ring at almost impossible speeds! RENEE We saw Ivar's old squire Tristan earlier! What can Ivar do at 24? COACH Homie might just win the thing! Ivar came into the ring and started trading punches with THE FLEX immediately! And this time it was Ivar looking strong as he took out FLEX with a lariat! “YYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Tyler didn't like that at all, but at least FLEX was able to block Ivar's attempts to eliminate him, although FLEX had to use an eye rake to do so. COACH If it works it works. Ain't no time to play fair in the Rumble. RENEE We've for sure seen some pretty questionable actions in the Rumble over the years. BCG was playing with fire hammering BW with forearms and chops. And he got burned as Baron hit him in the gut with a boot and then hurled him over the top with a pump handle slam! “BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Bi-Curious George Eliminated by Baron Windels Entered 19th Eliminated 16th Eliminations: None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH Nope, freaky nigga, you ain't heading to AngleMania's mainevent! Oscar was catching a breather in the corner, having been in the match longer than anyone not named Baron. He watches as Ivar pounds on Leon in the corner. Ivar is perhaps motivated by Colin's treatment but Leon manages to overpower Ivar and is aided by Buckworth smashing Ivar in the back of the head with a lairat! RENEE Its a very good thing vampire's can't get concussions! The countdown comes over again and then comes... I wrote her off for the tenth time today And practiced all the things I would say But she came over I lost my nerve I took her back and made her dessert Now I know I'm being used That's okay because I like the abuse I know she's playing with me That's okay 'cause I've got no self-esteem RENEE Number 25 is Sloppy Joe! COACH Why? Leon and Teddy look at each other in wonder as fat boy blubbered and hustled to the ring as fast as he possibly can, which isn't very fast. RENEE Good luck, Joe! COACH You're gonna need it. Joe tried to slide into the ring, which doesn't work all that well. But Teddy and Leon went ahead and pull him in. BUCKWORTH Well now, a gold star for bravery, a beat down for insolence. Leon and Teddy banged on Joe's head with stomps and kicks, but then Oscar sprung into action and helped out Joe! This allowed Joe to get up and lariat Leon over the ropes! “YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” RENEE OMG! ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Leon Rodez Eliminated by Sloppy Joe Entered 22 Eliminated 17th Eliminations: None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH Who the hell saw that coming? I thought this dude was out in seconds and he eliminates Leon? RENEE Way to go, Joe! The battle continues as Northstar tried to end Baron's lengthy run by dropkicking him over the ropes. But Baron managed to keep himself grounded and only bounced against the cables before falling forward to the ground. COACH What's it gonna take to take Baron and Oscar out this match? Them cats have been in forever. Speaking of Oscar he was drapped over Teddy's shoulders and in danger of being tossed out the match. But The Freebird swung out the back and hit a neckbreaker! As everyone recovers we are mounting down the fans singing along, but then booing as this song plays... Ya, You never said a word You didn’t send me no letter Don’t think I could forgive you Smoke fills the entry way as Logan Mann has the audacity to arrive in Jesus robes as “Prayer In C” rolls into the arena. Leezus Price gives thanks to himself and himself alone and then charges to the ring, at least discarding his Jesus robes before entering. RENEE Number 26, and I think the fans would rather we skipped this one. Logan slid into the ring, full of confidence that comes with first being Logan Mann, but also being the number 26 entry. He thought Sloppy was easy pickings, but couldn't lift the fat man over the ropes and instead got sent to the ground thinks to a single knife edge chop! “OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!” Sloppy Joe hit the ropes, to try a running splash, but the very second he got into the ropes, Baron exploded to knock him over the ropes with a lariat! “BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!” ~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Sloppy Joe Eliminated by Baron Windels Entered 25 Eliminated 18 Eliminations: Leon ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE Awww, Sloppy! And that's Baron's leading fourth elimination, despite being in longer than anyone. Logan hammered Northstar up and down the ropes, but never could get him out of the ring, and had plenty of problems when Northstar powered him to the mat with a release rock bottom! RENEE Maria! Pained and wounded and already sick of the rumble, Logan rolled out the ring and got yelled at by the crowd. “YOU'RE A COWARD! YOU'RE A COWARD! YOU'RE A COWARD!” COACH You heard the people, Ned! RENEE You know that's not who they're talking to. On comes the count down of doom... Hell's where I was born! Hell's where I was raised, This hell is where I'm from and this hell is where I'll stay. The hush is all I need to hush the misery; The hush that belongs to me, like the hush inside a dream Just be still and pray And let the noise just fade away. And doom was hat in the form of 24/7 Champion and powerful werewolf, TurboWolf! RENEE That's a great entry number. 27 for someone who just rolls through the competition! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted February 21, 2017 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2017 The 24/7 champ slid into the ring and found Baron and Ned locked into an epic struggle at the edge of the ring. TW couldn't give a flying fuck about their beef and just lariated them both out the ring!!! "OOOOOOHHHH!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Ned Blanchard Eliminated by TurboWolf Eliminated 19 Entered 16 Eliminated Mister Dick ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Baron Windels Eliminated by TurboWolf Eliminated 20th Entered 8th Eliminated Lucius Soul, Chad Mustard, Lancel Locke, Bi Curious George, Sloppy Joe ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Baron and Ned hold each other responsible for this debacle and continued to brawl until the officials got extra security to hold them back! RENEE Whew! We almost got a whole new match at ringside. We still might as Ned leaped over the officials and pounded Baron! "YYYYYEEEEEAAAA!" But help arrived for Baron as Jock yanked Ned off and slung him head first into the entrance doors! Ned bled from the head and that was mixed with spit from a loogie by BW! RENEE Ewww! MISTER DICK You want me to give him my special Texas clam chowder? BARON Forget it, he's not worth it. The countdown rolled on, and then.. "Can't Stop It Can't Stop It" "BOOOOOOOOO!" Out came an XFL who was in such a bad mood, he doesn't even bother to mock an ailing Ned on his way to the ring. RENEE It was a tough loss to Trios Champs earlier tonight but something tells me if The Young Wolf wins The Rumble that'll all be forgotten. The Young Wolf got attacked right away by the real wolf, TW, and was dangerously close to getting eliminateed! COACH Or he could get madder. Feel bad for duke. RENEE Only you and Rhaenys feel that way. Maybe Heyross. Maybe. No need, Coach, as MATHIS GOLDEN slid into the ring and smashed TW with a heart punch! RENEE HEART OF GOLD! COACH Yo, this nigga ain't in no Rumble! But he did pin TW! RENEE Hey! Hey! An official slid into the ring and counted to three making Golden the new 24/7 champion! RENEE The All XFL Team is golden after all! What's worse is that The XFL pitched Turbo out of the ring! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: TurboWolf Eliminated by The XFL Eliminated 21 Entered 26 Eliminated Baron Windels, Ned Blanchard ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As Golden left with his title and The XFL played we got the count leading to.. I'm giving you a night call to tell you how I feel I want to drive you through the night, down the hills I'm gonna tell you something you don't want to hear I'm gonna show you where it's dark, but have no fear "Nightcall" played to a chorus of boos as the biggest lowlife we may know, Remy Bazil slithers out with a finally happy Deirdre at his side. RENEE We know why Deirdre is happy, this is the best luck Remy has ever had, a number 29 draw! Remy knew it too, entering with confidence just seeping out his pores. And into his brain because he decided to kick things off with a card trick! DEIRDRE NO! STOP! Remy didn't listen. He should have. But he didn't and that's why Oscar was able to toss him out the ring! "YYYYYEEAAAA!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Remy Bazil Eliminated by Oscar Friberg Eliminated 22nd Entered 29th Eliminated None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ DEIRDRE Idiot! RENEE Is anyone surprised by that? Nope! But the show continued with Northstar trying to dump Oscar. The Dutch babyface fought him off then fended off THE FLEX as the champ sat back rooting on his boy. RENEE Only one more entrant but we have no clue who it is. Ivar and Teddy were getting into it with Ivar attempting to rid the rumble of Teddy with a rolling firemans carry. But Teddy avoided this and hit a neckbreaker on his fellow vampire. Meanwhile Logan chilled and watched events unfold. COACH Logan smart. Oscar been here much longer than anyone and he still wanna fight. Fool ass Simpberg. Logan got confronted by Teddy, but reminded him of the good ol THR/Enterprise days and was able to avoid a beating. Sadly that meant demise of The XFL who Teddy just tossed out the ring like he trash! THE XFL ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: The XFL Eliminated by Teddy Buckworth Eliminated 23 Entered I forgot and don't wanna look it up Eliminated TurboWolf ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Next all attention was on the count. RENEE This is a mystery who is number thirty! The countdown took forever and then... "HE'S SIMPLY RAVISHING!" "YYYYYEEAAAAAAAA!" RENEE No way! No way! No way! The fans in DC and all across the globe mark the fuck out and lose their shit as one Tony mother fucking Brannigan strode out, navy robe in tact, and soaked up the incredible moment he had created! COACH Sophie had heat up her sleeve! Tyler does not see it that way and turns over his snack tray in disgust with Lorelei sitting with dropped jaw! Down the ramp comes Brannigan fans across the arena bowing and worshipping in reverence to the Hall of Famer! COACH it's an AngleMania moment and it even AngleMania! FLEX told Brannigan to bring it and took a swing when he entered. Brannigan ducked the attack and carried himself forward to clothesline Northstar out the ring! "YYYYEEAAAAAA!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Northstar Eliminated by Teddy Buckworth Eliminated 24 Entered 18 Eliminated None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "YOU STILL GOT IT! YOU STILL GOT IT! YOU STILL GOT IT!" The Flex seized upon Brannigan and battered him with punches. But The Body ducked another lariat and this one wound up connecting with Ivar and launching him out the ring! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Ivar The Cunning Eliminated by The FLEX Eliminated 25 Entered 24 Eliminated None ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ FLEX took his eye off the prize and got bundled out the ring in a hurry by a surging Brannigan! "YYYYYEEEAAAA!" RENEE Yes! He got him! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: THE FLEX Eliminated by Tony Brannigan Eliminated 26 Entered 25 Eliminated Ivar The Cunning ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Backstage Tyler damn near fell out and threw a tantrum over the turn this Rumble had taken! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Final Four: Teddy Buckworth, Tony Brannigan, Oscar Friberg, Logan Mann ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE Wow, what a final four, all these men have been singles champions, all are threats to win the world title at AngleMania. BUCKWORTH Well now what's it going to be, cousin? Tony showed his cuz what it be by slugging him in the jaw! "YYYYEEAAAAAAA!" Buckworth just laughed at this then promptly made his kin pay with a steiner screwdriver! "BBBBOOOOOOOO!" The DC fans were pissed but Tyler was rocking with joy! RENEE Spear of Longinus! It slew Jesus did it slay Tony's dreams? Oscar jumped on Teddy, hammering him with forearms! COACH Fool ass, you been in since number eight and you coming to the freshman's rescue. Buckworth tried to give Oscar a Samoan drop out the ring but The Freebird countered with a front flip neckbreaker! However, Logan jumped on him and delivered a wave of punches before trying to throw him out the ring. But Oscar did the whole Kyle O'Reily through the ropes thing and was able to lariat not Logan but an unexpecting Buckworth out the ring! "YYYYEAAAAA!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Teddy Buckworth Eliminated by Oscar Friberg Eliminated 27th Entered 15th Eliminated Coco Chanel, BPT, The XFL ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Brannigan paid Oscar back by taking on Logan, battering him into the corner. Logan fought back and pounded his foe towards the center of the ring. There Tony tried a Ravishing Neckbreaker but Logan escaped and hit a deadly Liberation DDT! "OOOOOOHHH!" Backstage Tyler ordered Logan to throw Brannigan out but again Oscar came to the legend's aid. COACH Simpberg. Oscar threw Logan over the ropes with a t bone suplex, but on sheer luck alone Logan was able to land on the apron and avoid doom! RENEE Too close! Back in the ring, Logan and Oscar threw hands with Logan being a little loopy. Still he was able to nail Oscar with a Wicked Left Hook and that was all he needed to then toss him out! "BBBBOOOOOOO!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Oscar Friberg Eliminated by Logan Mann Eliminated 28th Entered 8th Eliminated Teddy Buckworth, Logan Mann ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ RENEE It will be Logan Mann or Tony Brannigan in the AngleMania mainevent! For Tyler is better be Logan, for the world champ is on the verge of a heart attack and Lorelei panicking is no help. But TB is still recovering from the Liberation, giving Logan plenty of time to taunt. LOGAN I ain't Leezus Price though?! "BOOOOOOOO!" Leezus took Brannigan upright and peppered him with punches to set up the Wicked Left Hook. But Brannigan blocked the blow and hit his own ddt! COACH That took a lot out of TB. It did as Logan was first to rise, angry at the counter. He blasted Brannigan with even more punches then tried to toss him out only to get blocked and met with elbows to the ribs! RENEE Tony is still in this, but this Logan's second final two appearance in three years, he's learned something. Logan decked Brannigan with a headbutt of all things! LOGAN Halle Berry, hallelujah, holla back I'll do ya! Beast! "BBBBOOOOOOO!" Logan pulled Brannigan into a standing head scissors and had a plan to powerbomb him out the ring. But Brannigan upended him with a back drop over the ropes! RENEE Logan could be gone! But the former US champion held onto the ropes and kept himself alive, much to Tyler's delight. LOGAN I'm still Leezus Price! Logan decided to get fancy by slingshotting himself into the ring, but Brannigan stuffed him with his own Wicked Left Hook that sent him tumbling him to the mat! "YYYYYEEAAAAAA!" RENEEOh my god! Oh my god! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Eliminated: Logan Mann Eliminated by Tony Brannigan Eliminated 29 Entered 26 Eliminated Oscar Friberg ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WINNER: Tony Brannigan Entered 30 Eliminated THE FLEX, Logan Mann ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ COACH Aww shit, TB did it! Pandemonium had broken out all across the galaxy as Brannigan was on his knees, breathing in the glory of his achievement and returning the fans' love with a solid fist pump. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen your winner of the 2017 Lethal Rumble, TONYYYYY BBBRRRRAAANNNNIIIGGGAANN!! "YYYYEEEEAAAAAA!" Tony has headed to the top rope and points to the AM sound as Logan threatened to go off at any second, while the world champ already has! RENEE What an epic return to the OAOAST! No one saw it coming, and after all these years Tony Brannigan can make his AngleMania dream come true. A huge pyro display went off in one final celebration for The Body, but best believe the party is gonna go on all night. RENEE Look out, Tyler Bryant, here comes The Body!!! FADE OUT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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