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OAOAST TMW: A comedy/erotic e-fed

AnglePalooza 2k16


Chanel #99

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TV M
L, V, N


PRESENTED IN OAOASTHD

* DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA *

Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid's shock and delight.

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THE OAOAST... WHAT THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD IS READING~!

The show opens with a shot of New Year's eve revelers at various cities -- New York, Paris, Tokyo, Mexico, etc -- counting down from 10-1 (in their native language). Images of OAOAST superstars in action mesmerize the crowds. Then a OAOAST logo shaped New Year's ball drops in various parts of the world!

ANGLEPALOOZA 2K16

RENEE
Vroom! Vroom! The Road to AngleMania is here! This is AnglePalooza from Toronto, Ontario, Canda, home of the NBA All Star game and now The Lethal Bang and Lethal Rumble. And joining me to call the Lethal Bang is the OAOAST Women's Champion, Holly!

HOLLY
One woman. One woman gets the pleasure of getting their ass stomped into the minor leagues by this redheaded bitch right here. Who's it gonna be?

RENEE
The field is wide open!

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We go from Sofa Central to ringside which is full of naked Hotties and naked Superstars. But for now we focus on Michael Buffer.

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen it is time for the 2016 Lethal Bang! With the winning Hottie being the Hottie who orgasms last, and that Hottie will face the OAOAST Women's Champion at SluttyMania!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
Introducing, first, from Seattle, Washington, “ASSCAKE” BOBBI CHEESECAKE!

“YYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Los Angeles, California, “THE FUCKSLUT FROM HELL” MAYA DUNCAN BLANCHARD!

“YYYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Lexington, Kentucky, “THE NATURE GIRL” SUGAR BELLEFLAIR!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

BUFFER
From Lviv, Ukraine....DASHA!

“YYYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Alexander, Virgina, “THE MONARCH OF POSH” GRETCHEN WRIGHT!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Asgard, “THE ANARCHIC ANGEL” ANNAGRET WICKEDBORN!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Los Angeles, California, “LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA” JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN!

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Marseilles, France SOPHIE GREEEEEYYYYYYYYYY!

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Lovelock, Nevada “THE SPICE OF LIFE” CINNAMON SPOONS!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Big Bear, California “ THE VANILLA FREAKAZOID” BUSTY ROSE!

“BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

BUFFER
From Hartford, Connecticut, “THE KINSLAYER” DEIRDRE!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

BUFFER
From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada MADISON NERDLY!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Yaroslavl, Russia, “THE VIOLET SHARK” ANASTASIA VIOLETTA!

“BBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

BUFFER
From Kyoto, Japan, SUNSHINE YUKINO!

“YYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, MALAYSIA NERDLY!

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

BUFFER
From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada “THE DEATH VIEL CUTIE” MAGGIE NERDLY!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

BUFFER
From Rush, Ireland “THE DAUGHTER OF DARKNESS” LYRIC DELACEY!

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
From Los Angeles, California....”MISS CALIFORNIA” KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

BUFFER
And from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, “THE MAPLE LEAF CUTIE” MORGAN NERDLY! Let the 2016 Lethal Bang BEIGN!

YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
Holly, I'd ask for your strategy but you were the first one eliminated last year.

HOLLY
(beep) off.

And away we go! The first focus is on Bobbi, who is swirling her tongue around the head of Doc White's cock. Doc has experience with Bobbi, but this is even better than before as Bobbi has developed the new technique of digging her tongue right into his slit. Its a bit of a tease for Bobbi, just taste of the real magic she can work. And that magic comes soon enough as Bobbi plasters her mouth with the upper part of Doc's shaft. Its an amazing feeling, the warmth of Bobbi's breath just on part of his dick.

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The cock sucking continues down the way as Busty is on her knees, blowing James Riggs. Riggs is of course enjoying himself, running coarse fingers through her pitch black hair. Its much more romantic a gesture than Busty is used to dealing with BPT, but its appreciated nonetheless. Busty glares up at Riggs keeping her grey gaze on his rugged face, she takes swipes with her tongue against his member. After a few gentle strokes with her pink tongue, her mouth welcomes the dick home with some light bobs.

HOLLY
I like Busty as much I can like another person, but what kind of (beep) (beep) is that? Hey, why the (beep) am I still getting bleeped out? There's a mass orgy going on and you still won't let me curse!

Elsewhere Sonic has decided to approach Yukino who is hanging back to survey the scene.

SONIC
What about you and I? Does that sound cool?

SUNSHINE YUKINO
Hmmmmmmmm. Cool.

SONIC
Cool.

Yukino drops to her knees, facing away from Sonic and presenting her much sought after Asian pussy to young Sonic.

SONIC
Very cool.

HOLLY
What is he? Carlito?

Sonic lines himself up with Yukino and passes his needy cock directly through her walls. Instantly Yukino becomes moist, as if someone turned the switch to a Japanese garden's fountain. Vast wetness forms in her sex at the brilliance of Sonic's entrance. Sonic is soon like a scuba diver, powering through the ocean with how wet Yukino has become.

YUKINO
This amazing sex! You too good! You too good!

Its just a steady, pleasing rhythm to Sonic, a gentle nudge of his cock through Yukino's pussy. But to Sunshine Yukino its like the solar flare of sexual intercourse, a magic explosion of light all throughout her horny pussy. Its all too much for Yukino to take, she wasn't expecting Sonic's cock to be that of a super powered demi god. It is a true golden spear that pierces her rising sun and has her hollering...

SUNSHINE
I CUMMMINNNGG!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED 1st: SUNSHINE YUKINO
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
One Hottie down. Holly, you won't be facing Yukino at SluttyMania.

HOLLY
Lucky me.

Krista has forgone blowjobs and handjobs for the moment, rather choosing to bend over and take it from behind from Brian Travis Kidd. BTK savors whatever short moment he has and is truly ramming into Krista. His lean size doesn't prevent him for powering his dick through Krista's sex, shooting his penis into her with enough force to keep propelling the MILF skank forward. The only reason his hard cock strokes don't bowl her over is because he's got his hands on her slender hips. Its rough sex, but when your as skanky as Krista that's what you love.

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KRISTA
What's your name, baby?

BRIAN
Uh-

KRISTA
Nevermind, I don't care, just keep pounding this space age MILF pussy!

Gretchen is overlooking things, still unsure how to proceed in her first Lethal Rumble. As she wanders around she bumps into her brother. Her naked, fully erect brother!

GRETCHEN
AIIIEEEEE!

WRIGHT
Ah!

GRETCHEN
Yes well then we have encountered each other, and we shall on be on our way and have no more interaction. And I would ask you not tell mother about this.

WRIGHT
A wise request.

The smallest Hottie in this match, Sugar Belle is putting herself through a big ride on Detective Bosley's dick. She flings herself upward, boosted by his manly hands, and then comes crashing down, a near attack on his dick with her tiny thighs and legs. Tiny as she may be its a massive burst of sexual energy for Bosley to be ridden with such aggression.

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SUGAR
Yeah! I'm doing a real man! Not some punk kid, because I ain't a punk kid! I'm a real woman!

Near Sugar Maya is trying to give Tim Cash a handjob but she keeps getting distracted by Jade.

JADE
Are you okay?

MAYA
I'm surrounded by penises, my favorite thing in the world. Why wouldn't I be okay?

JADE
You aren't talking to me.

MAYA
Because I'm jerking off Tim Cash.

JADE
I love you.

MAYA
I'm just gonna go give some one else a handie.

CASH
:(

Cash doesn't have to be sad for long as Gretchen comes to up with a warm smile.

GRETCHEN
Tim Cash, you a man of high moral fiber, it would be an honor for me to perform anal...fellatio on you.

CASH
Anal fellatio?

GRETCHEN
No, no, just fellatio. Nothing to do with analingus or anything of that nature.

HOLLY
Hahaha, this oughta be real (beep)ing good.

Gretchen makes one of the referees lay a TOWEL on the ground, so her knees will not be soiled by the ring mat. When that is taken care of to her standards, she situates herself on the ground, with her blue eyes locked onto Cash's penis.

GRETCHEN
Now then, I shall give you the pleasure and privilege of receiving oral sex from me.

Gretchen takes just the tippiest of the tip into her mouth, resting right on the edge of her tongue. Its barely enough to be considered oral sex.

HOLLY
That's (beep) weak!

RENEE
Maybe she's just a tease.

Slowly, and with painful elegance and grace does Gretchen further allow the cock access to her mouth. Her eyes float up to Cash, who is dying from the lovely feel of her mouth and the torturous pace of her blowjob. His suffering does not influence Gretchen's technique in the least. She continues to allow a leisurely journey by her mouth to be had around Cash's schlong. In the end, though, she is fully engaged in her blowjob, pulling the skin along with her with loving caring suck.

RENEE
See I told you!

HOLLY
Shut it.

Busty is on her back, legs in the air with J-MAX pounding away. The masked grappler has tons of energy and is slapping his balls against her thighs with each speedy stroke of his penis. Busty hadn't expected to like being fucked missionary by a masked dude, but J-MAX is relentless in his insertions of his cock, like having a dildo on the speediest setting thrust into her.

BUSTY
Holy shit, I'm cumming!     

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED 2nd: Busty Rose
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
Back to the Missionary Man for Busty Rose!

Annagret's moist lips slide over The Warthog's hefty cock, with her wicked tongue testing his slit. Her smooth hands cup his balls, feeling their incredible might. Then her tongue wiggles against the underside of the chocolate shaft, seguing into liquid and rhythmic.

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HOLLY
Throat (beep) her, get her out of there for me! (beep) that dumb bitch!

RENEE
How about showing some class for once?!

The sky high thug known as Ice Quiz rubs little Dasha's sweet pussy, and then  attends to her desperate clit.   He makes Dasha, yelp, jump and gasp and clutch at his broad muscles. Her reactions seem to inspire him, and soon her is spinning, body filling with intense mushy heat.   The gangbanger takes the Euro trash bitch to that wonderful place just shy of orgasm.

RENEE
Ice Quiz fingering Dasha through broken ribs. What a warrior!

HOLLY
God dam, you'll spit any old cliché. A whole lot of pain fingering a hot European bitch.

Free of any incidents with his sister, Wright is directly next to his partner mirroring his work with another smaller girl, Maggie Nerdly. His first two fingers thrust into her fast and furious. Maggie feels herself go into that heady rush that leaps her towards climax.   Her back bows and one foot springs from the floor.

MAGGIE
Ugggh! Unnnhhhh! Cummming!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED 3rd: Maggie Nerdly
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
Thank the universe, Christian is still single, I might be able to get a date!

HOLLY
I don't go for those sappy guys.

As Maggie, clears out her elder sister, Malaysia is on a hunt.

MALAYSIA
Where is my sweet Esmeralda? Where is my little girl?  

HOLLY
Get your head in the game and focus on winning this match!

MALYSIA
Where is he? Where is he?

Malaysia doesn't get greeted by Archie, but rather by Archie's pal, CLAR AISLING DELACEY who hops over the guardrail and attacks her!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

The two begin a fight that threatens to disrupt the whole Lethal Bang!

RENEE
Holly your best friend is going nuts! Aren't you gonna do something?

HOLLY
You act like I'm that bitch's mom. She can do what she wants.

Luckily for everyone else, Aisling and Malaysia brawl themselves all the way backstage!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED 4th: Malaysia Nerdly
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HOLLY
Problem took care of itself.

RENEE
You are an awful friend.

Deirdre's legs are stacked on top of each other, as Piercey D guides his cock into her aching, tingling, lovable snatch. She gasps as The Result pushes deeper and deeper past her nether lips, into her vagina. Deirdre feels every inch of his cock as he plunges in deep.   Half his length fills her with the first thrust.   He pulls almost out, before going in even deeper, and then the true fucking begins!

DEIRDRE
Oh. My. God!

 

Rico and Remy see this and aren't happy.

RICO
Hey, mang, that asshole kid is messing with our woman.

REMY
Mon ami, relax, there is no need for hostility. We have the entire smorgasbord of Hotties just waiting for our pleasure. Let us take our time and conserve our strength, and then, mon ami, then we unleash the beasts.

RICO
Hhehehee.

HOLLY
Those are two are (beep)ing stupid.

RENEE
Wow, we actually agree on something.

Anastasia has been paired off with Phecda, which isn't exactly an unlikely mating. But in this case its more like they're posing, rather than fucking, as Phecda is just using her pussy as a sleeping bag for his dick.

HOLLY
What the shit is that?

RENEE
He won't have actual sex with her, so she won't orgasm and won't be eliminated. That's kind of cheating if you ask me. It shouldn't be allowed.

HOLLY
I changed my mind, if you don't like it, it must be a good thing.

Aanstasia's old flame, Lyric, however, is truly in the spirit of things having wrapped her muscular legs around Ser Pike Pantera's huge frame as he uses his considerable strength to jackhammer his cock into her. Lyric does her part to kick the pleasure into a wild state as she hurls her hips forward, grinding into the big boy. All while his is going on Flex Strutter is groping her sizable tits, using them as his personal stress balls.

LYRIC
Yes, mates, that's it! Use me like a filthy bloody minx!

Madison, as expected is in over her head, and has to turn to the biggest whore on earth for advice...

MADISON
Krista, help!

KRISTA
What's wrong, Doctor Maddy?

MADISON
I don't know what to do. I can't very well ask Morgan, she'll just laugh at me. Besides, you're you know....better at this sort of situation.

KRISTA
You mean mass public sex? Yes, I do have a certain je ne sais quoi about me when it comes to open fornication, don't I? So what do you need?

MADISON
Do I just go ask someone how to start? What do I do? Its very intimdating.

KRISTA
Lots of hot studs about, it can be a little frightening for one who doesn't make it their business to constantly suck cock as I do. We need someone who's well incredibly unattractive. Daddy! Oh, daddy!

Congressman Duncan waddles over to his daughter.

PAPA DUNCAN
Hey, Krista, my cock ring hasn't fallen off once yet. You were right about this thing!

MADISON
:scust:

KRISTA
Daddy, my friend Maddy needs an unattractive troll like person to have sex with. And you're of course the first person I thought of. So can she?

PAPA DUNCAN
Can she? I ain't fucked a broad this nice since before your mother's shitty nose job. Let's get to it!

Papa Duncan flops onto the floor, which is reminiscent of a walrus dying of a heart attack.

MADISON
Are you sure about this?

KRISTA
Am I sure of anything? Not unless I'm drunk, which I am, so yes I'm sure. Are you ready, daddy?

PAPA DUNCAN
Penetrate me at your leisure!

MADISON
Okay, here goes...

Madison situates herself over Papa Duncan, getting a full view of this toothsome lecherous grin. That might scare most women off, but Madison is a brave girl and lowers herself onto this troll creature's protruding member.

KRISTA
It is an honor for me to have you ride my dad's schlong.

MADISON
Oh, the uh, honor is, uh all mine.

PAPA DUNCAN
Whee! Ride the troll!

That's not exactly confidence inducing for poor Madison, but she can't chicken out now. So she lowers herself onto the cock ring lined penis of Papa Duncan, pushing the meat missile all the way into her opening, until that cock ring rests against her quivering lips.

KRISTA
Okie doke, looks like you're all situated, so I'm gonna skedaddle.

MADISON
You're leaving me?

KRISTA
Duh, there's about a hundred cocks out here, and I plan on getting dp'ed by every mathematically possible combination.

Krista walks off with Madison growing horrified at being left alone with her dad.

PAPA DUNCN
You feel purrdy on my pee-pee.

Madison's body grows tense, fat hands grope her breasts, and she knows she must act. She starts bouncing herself up and down, easing into a steady hard rhythm that pounds her pussy a lot harder than she'd have wanted. Yet every thrust sends amazing ripples of pleasure through her, while also forcing a great shame over her. Never did she think she'd be fucking a fat ex-politician in front of millions. Soon her vagina IS throbbing, pulsing around his invading cock.

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PAPA DUNCAN
Yes, fuck the troll!

MADISON
Can you not talk?

PAPA DUCNAN
Sure thing, toots!

Gloss is discussing terms of an engagement with Studderboxx.

GLOSS
So my friend she's gotta watch, that's sort of her thing these days. Watching me get boned. So if you're cool with it, we can bang, I haven't done a dude in the mask since Nixon was in office.

The camera pans over to see a naked Sammi standing behind Gloss.

SAMMI
Please, Studderboxx! Pretty please!

STUDDERBOXX
***Makes winning buzzer sound***

SAMMI and GLOSS
Hooray!

Sammi hovers about, pulsing with horniness at the fucking that's to come. She watches as Studerboxx takes hold of Gloss' leg in one arm, and angles his penis to stroke her slick tingling folds. In pushes his penis, and up thrust his hips. Every stroke sent the most wonderful sensations rippling through her overheating body.   Gloss wiggles and writhes, and flashes a hungry smile at Sammi.

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GLOSS
You like what you see, baby?

SLAMMI
Mmmm-hmmm!

GLOSS
Then, Slammin Sammi, slam those fingers into that pussy!

SAMMI
Mmmm, yeah, awesome idea!
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Elsewhere, Gretchen is in danger! For Bosley has focused directly on her tan butt. His fingertips work high into her butt crack, and Gretchen rises up on her toes when those wicked fingers pass over her butt hole. A jolt shoots up through her body, and falls down straight into her vagina.

GRETCHEN
Ugh! My anus is being violated!

HOLLY
Give up! Give up, bitch, you can't last!

Gretchen's pussy throbs. It has never felt so hot, wet, or achy before. Yet she won't let herself cum!

RENEE
Look at that self control by Gretchen! Pretty amazing stuff.

HOLLY
She's getting fingered, fingered in the ass and she ain't coming. Big (beep)ing deal.

Right next to Bosley, is his partner, CPA showing the strength in his form by compressing Cinnamon, and using the force of his invading phallus and the crush of his hips to push her into the ground. Cinnamon is panting,and having a tough time being put through a position that churns her insides with CPA's massive meat. Still she clamps her pelvic muscles around his shaft like a lioness bites the long, slender neck of a gazelle. Our Cinnamon is a tough one, as she lets her black lion force his way through the vise like grip of her pussy.

CINNAMON
Yep, yep, I see why Annagret likes you people! People who wear sunglases indoors are great at this sex thing!

HOLLY
That bitch is straight up dumb.

CPA drills Cinnamon harder and harder with his dick bouncing our slutty Valkyrie off the ground as if she were as light as a ping pong ball

RENEE
Jesus how she can take that?

HOLLY
You (beep) a horse, you can take anything.

Morgan is left on her back, being worked over by the questing fingers of Eagle Eye, of all dudes.

RENEE
He's got the eagle eye for the Maple Leaf Cutie. Hheheehehe.

HOLLY
That was unbelievably corny.

That finger thrusts into little Morgan over and over, driving her crazy.   Her insides go from warm and fuzzy to hot and mushy.   Pussy throbbing, so achy and tingly, Morgan gasps for air.

HOLLY
She's on the verge.

MORGAN
I'm not cumming! I'm not!

Her body is hungry for that exhilarating release, but her mind is desperate to deny. Deny, deny, deny. Constant rejection letters from mind to orgasm. But the orgasm doesn't give up! It kicks Morgan's door down and says here I am, bitch, better love me!

MORGAN
I'M CUMMMMMMMINNG!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 5th: Morgan Nerdly
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Madison sees that her sister has been eliminated and is sent over the moon with glee!

MADISON
She's gone! I outlasted her!

PAPA DUNCAN
The job ain't finished, toots. This cock ring and the pills Bedrock got me are gonna keep my erect for three days.

MADISON
You got erection pills from a caveman? That seems like a bad idea.

PAPA DUNCAN
What are you? A doctor?

MADISON
Yes!

As Morgan storms off, she walks past December who is....sleeping.

HOLLY
That bitch is gonna win just because she's got narcolepsy. What a crock of (beep)!

Sophie is on her knees hauling Rayder's cock into her mouth for several bobs. Just as she starts to groan from the feel of the cock in her mouth, she turns and wraps her lips around Scourge's dick. The thick piece of meat overstuff's her tiny mouth. Sophie then takes the scientific route and decides to measure the length of the cock's together.

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RENEE
Sacre bleu, they are huge, mais oui?

HOLLY
Your accent is as crap as your jokes.

Deidre is still going strong, face fucking herself with the powerful rod of TMW's Jesse Ferguson. Ferguson shows some raw carnal aggression himself, grabbing her head with both of his hands. In he thrusts, harder, deeper, nastier with each pillage into Deirdre's mouth.

RENEE
Who said guys with glasses don't know how to have a good time?

Maya is stretched out on the ground, providing her excellent blowjob skills to one Sonic Jr In fact the gif is so long I don't even have to write anything I just have to show it!

MAYA
Whoo! What a cock ya got, Sonic! Makes up for your stupid nickname, buddy.

SONIC
:)

BOBBI
You're doing great, Maya! You're such a good friend and an awesome generous person, and you're so wonderful and magical!

MAYA
Uh, yeah, sure.

Remy and Rico who have imporbably and foolishly stood on the sidelines to wait for their moment finally see something they like.

REMY
Jade Rodez-Duncna. Are you thinking what I am thinking, mon ami?

RICO
Hheheheh, you bet I am, mang. You bet I am.

REMY
Then let us go, we must be away. And she must be out of this competition.

Remy and Rico strut their stuff, their naked stuff, to Jade, ready to take her by hook or my crook and mostly by crook. Jade sees them coming and is less than welcoming to their arrival with a scowl. And yet they keep approaching.

RENEE
I don't like the way this is heading, Holly.

HOLLY
I couldn't give a (beep) what happens to Jade. No, I take that back, I do enjoy seeing her suffer and lose.

As soon as Rico and Remy reach Jade, who's on the floor with Slime, they sink to their knees for action. But they're given quite the fright as LUCIUS SOUL hops the guardrail to confront them!

“YYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

SOUL
Good evening, punk ass bustas!

JADE
Lucius! What's going on?

SOUL
Back it up, babygirl, the Soul Man needs to bake these turkeys.

RICO
Eh, mang, there's two of us. And one of you. You're not gonna do a damn thing, mang.

SOUL
Don't believe me just watch!

Soul drops his pants to expose a HUUUUGGEEEE ERECTION TO THE WORLD!

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

RENEE
Oh!

HOLLY
Oh holy (beep)!

Remy and Rico start to scoot back, fearful of this monstrous penis! Yet there's no escape for them! None whatsoever! Soul's beast unleashes phallic hell and knocks them both out with one fell strike!

“YYYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAA!”

HOLLY
Never seen that before.

RENEE
I hope not!

JADE
Lucius, you're my hero!

SOUL
And you're my babygirl.

JADE
In that case, let your babygirl do you right.

SOUL
Well alright now!

Soul lies down on his back, shooting his dangerously sexy cock towards the ceiling of the arena. And soon its engulfed in the cozy confines of Jade's pussy as she forces herself down on it. By far its the biggest cock Jade's ever had, and getting in her pussy is more a process of withstanding its incredible girth than anything else. Once its in, she can feel its expanse pushing the room of her stomach, filling her womb as if it were a strangely shaped baby. And its this monster she begins riding.

JADE
That's good, daddy? That's real good right? Yeah it is, isn't! Yeah it is!

Lucius begins pushing upwards, firing his penis even further through Jade's sex. He goes deep into the cavernous depths of her stomach, traveling to regions few men have ever dared search out. Jade continues to slam her hefty body down on him. sending her ass cheeks rippling to add to the height of sexiness in this incredible fuck! But its so wonderful that Jade experiences release far soon than she experienced!

JADE
Cumming! Cumming! Cumming, daddy!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 6th: Jad Rodez Duncan
~~~~~~~~~~~~

HOLLY
That loser with the afro just did what Remy and Rico planned to do all along. What a (beep)ing putz!

RENEE
Aww don't be mean. And look they're leaving holding hands.

HOLLY
I'd never hold hands with my bitch of a husband.

MARV has already splashed his cum on Krista's face and her ginormous chest, and yet Krista's mouth refuses to relinquish hold of his beef rocket. Truly, Krista is a shining example for these Hotties! His cock is delightfully hot, sweaty and coated in cum. It makes an amazing stench, this delicious mixture of raw sex. It spurs her on sending her head back and forth, to guide her spread lips and roving tongue across every bit of his shaft.

HOLLY
Someone make that old bitch cum! Someone do it!

RENEE
Why don't you give it a shot?

HOLLY
(beep) off.

RENEE
Intimidated by a sexy older lady. I understand.

HOLLY
(beep) off!

Sonic has departed Maya to find himself inside the intimate shangri-la of another Sunray, this time Dasha. The petite yet busty cutie is bent forward, letting herself by lost in the raw grace of being pounded from behind by Sonic.

DASHA
Aiii, Hedgehog man is amazing for animal!

Sonic doesn't bother to comment that he's a human not a video game character. Why bother when heaps of pleasure are being dumped on his penis, that sloshes through the juice filled physical dimensons of
Dasha's hot lust.

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DASHA
Hedgehog man so wonderful inside me! So wonderful! So wonderful! Oh no I cum!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 7th: Dasha
~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENNE
That Sonic's got some mad skills to go with the good looks.

Madison has somehow and someway gotten into an erotic zone while fucking the ugliest man out here, Papa Duncan!

MADISON
Yes, yes, yes! Up and down, up and down!

Even with Papa Duncan's blubber heaving and leaping from her heavy leaps and drops on his dick, Madison still remains at the height of her lewd hot and desperate realm. The usual reserved and calm doctor is thrown into a space that pours grunts and screams from her mouth until finally she yells...

MADISON
I'm cumming! I'm cumming! Oh god I'm cumming!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 8thh: Madison Nerdly
~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
That's a pretty good showing by Madison, I think that's a woman who knows how to party.

HOLLY
Yeah on top of (beep)ing a sloth's sochlong! That bitch is disgusting.

RENEE
Hey, be nice!

December is still dozing off, yet has somehow been awake long enough to get a pillow and a teddy bear!

RENEE
She took all she can handle last year and won, so I guess December's strategy this year is to just say 'I have a headache.' and go to bed.

Seeing, December laying down get Sonic curious and he walks over to approach her.

SONIC
December?

DECEMBER
(sleepy)
Ahhhhhh, what's up?

SONIC
You're missing the whole Lethal Bang.

DECEMBER
Oh. Is that where I am? I forgot. Okay, you can bang me. I think.

SONIC
You think? I'll need a tad more conviction than that!

DECEMBER
Okay, plow it into me. That'd be cool.

SONIC
Trust me, the pleasure is all mine, but I'll give you some to.

DECEMBER
Ah, that's cool. Thanks.

December spreads her legs, while lying down (of course), and determines she's just going to sleep through the whole event. Yet when Sonic pushes his pecker through past her lips, he breaks a barrier, the barrier of sleepyheadness and encounters a thrilled December!

DECEMBER
Oh man! What a cock! What a cock! I think. No I know! This time I really do know! What a cock, Sonic!

Young Sonic plows deep into December's suddenly alive sex.   Her heart starts hammering as if she were thrown into a caffienne overdrive. Instead she's thrown into a sonic boom! Her breath catches, and it its so hard to get started again, her pants come out ragged and labored.   Sexy jolts rip through her., and her lower belly tightens

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DECEMBER
Ah, ah, ah, man, you're really good at this! And you're oh so hot. Probably. No, you're for sure hot! Keep it going, pretty boy!

HOLLY
(beep), you might be right. This Sonic kid found his calling. Better than flipping burgers for minimum wage at the shit joint Carl runs.

RENEE
I don't think he actually has to flip burgers. That'd be pretty sad if he did.

Speaking of burger flippers, Big Boy is living a scene Burger King employees can only hope to dream of. His meaty hamhocks are locked around Maya's arms, which usually seem heavy with muscle but look so thin and vulnerable held by Big Boy. His big boy meat rushes into her lovely cunt, heavy hips smashing against her slender ones.

MAYA
Make me your bitch, mister! Show the world who your bitch is!

Maya feels so full and desperate for more at the same time. She squeezes her vagina, almost as if she's trying to milk Big Boy's dick. Which she sort of is, hungry to squeeze his cum into her vagina. And those who like to see ugly dudes fuck pretty girls can have permission to beat off...

 

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Little Sugar gets a big stuffing, a double vagina stuffing from The Party Brigade! Despite the two confines, the two best friends manage to fuck Sugar like madmen. Its almost as if they're waging war for territory in Sugar's pussy.

RENEE
Oh my god, that's hot!

HOLLY
No (beep), but how's that little bitch taking it?

Huge sounds of joy and agony come from Sugar and she can't stop the flood that builds within her. Against the tremendous power of the double vagina fucking, Sugar bucks and her body writhes around the two invading penises.

SUGAR
Agggggh! I'm cumming! Dang it! Dang it all!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 9th: Sugar Belleflair
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few feet past Sugar, Deidre is the same position, being fucked in a frenzy by J-MAX!  Her insides pulse and pulse, the pleasure so intense it shuts down her mind down for a moment.   Her cum floods her tight channel, making her feel even slicker inside.   All Deirdre can do is gasp and shake, and savor the moment.   Its better than when she masturbated.   A hundred times better.   A thousand times better!!!! And much better than what Rico and Remy can offer!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 10th: Deirdre
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HOLLY
Bitches can't handle the d.

RENEE
You're one to talk. You got eliminated first last year!

Papa Duncan has moved on from Maddy and is having great fun with Bobbi, the older man pushing his face all the way into her boobs!  His stubble abrades her soft skin, silky skin. The teenager cries out, clutching the old man's head in both hands as he motorboats her tits.

BOBBI
Wow, I wonder where Tony Touerettes is? He's missing all the fan.

Meanwhile, at the Sky Dome

TONY
Where the fuck is everyone, Bedrock? Where's the Lethal Bang?

BEDROCK
Ooga trooga?!

Back at Air Canda Centre

GRETCHEN
I shall endeavor to be gangbanged at this moment!

HOLLY
She makes it sound like she's going to her prissy tea time.

Gretchen approaches the currently ready and waiting  KC Roach and Badass Jack

GRETCHEN
You look like serviceable men. I declare you shall penetrate me forthwith!

Certainly no further invitations are needed, especially when Gretchen latches her lips around Jack's schlong. That's Roach's cue to press into her, and being a Vainglorious Bastard he wastes no time with romance in sliding in on Gretchen. His thrusts are quick, dirty, and nasty for a girl not accustomed to such. This raw punishing of Gretchen's, spurs her body forward as he blows Jack. It causes her to take quick tongue strokes around his tip,  then wrap her lips around the hard ridge and to give him intense head.

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HOLLY
She's not gonna last.

RENEE
You said that twenty minutes ago, and here's Gretchen still banging away.

Annagret is almost filled to the brim with both members of Hood Again claiming her asshole and pussy as extensions of their turf. But there's still her mouth to be taken care of, and we have a willing participant on hand....

GOLDEN GRR
I'm ready for the party, boys!

MOSES
You sure you're at the right party?

GOLDEN GRR
Bitch, any party I'm at is the right party!

ANNAGRET
Whoa, let's see what you got, daddy. You think you can handle this white girl?

GOLDEN GRR
I was born to handle you, white girl.

The Golden Grr exposes an erection almost as big as Lucius Soul's and revels in the stunned and appreciative gaze Annagret gives him. But, its the feel of her hot and horny wet mouth that truly super charges the tiny tyke.

ANNAGRET
MMMFFFFF!

Annagret feels so damn stretched out by all this black cock she can't believe it. Even with being well fucked and wildly wet, all this chocolate feels huge within her. Her white  pussy tightens around Kwahi, which should make it harder for him to go into her. Doesn't matter. He just goes deeper and deeper, while his partner dives deeper and deeper into her anus, and Chick goes deeper and deeper down her mouth.

Tim Cash thrusts into Sofi's butt, driving deeper and deeper as her tight ring of muscles pulse around him, trying to adjust.   He feels twice as big in her butt.   Her hands claws at thin air, and his free hand comes around to roughly maul her jostling tits. Well as rough as he can.

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SOPHIE
C'est étonnant! Il est trop grand! Eet it making me cum from my pussy!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 11h: Sophie
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anal is also the order of the day of Lyric DeLacey, who has her legs pressed over head while MARV ravages her asshole. Luckily she's a flexible vamp! He fucks her even faster than he would her pussy, pushing in deep and sending wonderful ripples throughout her body.

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LYRIC
Bloody hell mate, you're going to break my brain!

Hot cum floods her poop chute.   It gets oh so hot and slippery inside her., as she feels the wealth of seed fill her rectum.

LYRIC
Yes, mate, yes! We cum together! We cum together!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 12h: Lyric
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
The girls are going down in more ways than one.

HOLLY
How many puns do you got?

RENEE
I've got at least fifty on deck, and twenty five back up puns. Wait till someone uses their arm pits!

HOLLY
You're a doofy bitch.

CINNAMON
Ugggggh!

That noise comes from Cinnamon being spit roasted by the Masked Mutants! The Valkyrie feels Snot gliding into her love canal effortlessly, her nice hole so wet and slick its ridiculous. And all the while the drool seeps out her mouth from the powerful conquest Slime makes of her mouth. All in days work for our heroine!

RENEE
Cinnamon was the runner up last year, so she's got plenty of stamina in the bedroom...or the public sex forum.  Or the horse stable!

HOLLY
I used a horse joke already.

Right next to Cinnamon's spit roast, Krista is bent over and having her snatch snacked on by a much younger man in Jo-Jo Whoa. Woe is not Krista, as Jo-Jo sweeps his tongue along the other folds of her pussy, before sending on an expedition through her insides. He also can't help himself but to grab onto her juicy body, pressing his fingers into her bronze skin.

KRISTA
Mama's pussy is absolute loving that! You are such a good boy! Such a good boy!

Lifetime losers The Rizzo and Coulter Doyle are in luck as they're pounding into Gloss with a double vagina stuffing. Most women would be horrified to be flooded with cock and their own spewing juices, such a feeling being too outrageous to bear. But Gloss is the horniest of the horny, loving her pussy being abused by two relentless cocks for the entertainment of Sammi, who's fingers dig into her pussy who's breath comes ragged and hard.

SAMMI
God, I love it! I love watching you get fucked Gloss! I want to watch you take cocks all day!

RENEE
Its a good thing Sammi's not in this match, she's cum enough for to be eliminated five times.

With Gretchen's leg raised high above her, Marty takes on the task of trying to lift her to orgasm. Gretchen groans a wild type of groan as  young Fox pierces her womanly region. His cock hammers in out of her, and Gretchen swears she can feel an electric pulse travel between him.. His bloated testicles swing beneath him, slapping against Gretchen with each surge of his hips. Not exactly a feeling she's used to, but so perverse she can't help but love it.

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HOLLY
If you're any kind of man, Marty, you'll make the bitch cum! Make her cum!

GRETCHEN
Though the fornication is no doubt pleasant, Holly, I will not reach orgasm until I am bedded atop the women's title!

HOLLY
Go to hell, bitch!

Sammi notices that something is amiss! Anastasia is still just posing in sexual positions with Phecda. The Lioness isn't about to suffer that injustice and readies herself to roar.

SAMMI
What do you two think you're doing?

ANASTASIA
Its none of your business what we're doing last time I checked.

SAMMI
Except now I'm checking and it is my business.

Sammi tackles Anastasia to the ground, which pops the sold out Canadian crowd! But rather than engage in a catfight with the Russian babe, she starts sliding her leg against her thigh, engaging in an unwelcome but splendid trib that Anastasia can't bring herself to fight against!

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“YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAA!”

Phecda makes a move to stop Sammi from thrilling the audience and bringing Anastasia to release.

GLOSS
Not so fast, buster!

But he's halted as Gloss bites his hand!

PHECDA
AHHHHHHHHHHH!

And with no help on the horizon, and no escape from the mounting of the Lioness, Anstasia's plan falls to pieces.

ANASTASIA
Oh gaaaawdddddd I'm cumming! No! No! Why meeeeeeeeeeee?

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 13h: Anastasia Violetta
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

GLOSS
Team high five!

SAMMI
I'll pass on that sort of display. Its more a low class thing.. But the thought is there for sure.

RENEE
Eight girls are left after a daring move by Sammi!

HOLLY
If she tried that move with me....I'd probably let her....but then I'd slap her.

Anastasia is throwing a fit, having to be escorted off by a referee and a bleeding Phecda. But the show must go on, and with less girls and plenty of guys, the Hotties are in over their heads. Poor Bobbi is in the midst of a brutal blowbang with Fenrir's dick clobbering her mouth, stretching out her cheek and knocking against the waiting dick of an impatient Vinny Valentine. While the pretty blond whore gives Vinny an unwilling cheek job, and gets throat fucked by Fenrir, Blackhawk waits ready to force his dick upon her unwitting person.

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RENEE
I don't know if Bobbi's gonna cum, but she might just pass out!

December Belle has three men taking her through the rough trails to sexual nirvana. Big Boy pounds into her, crushing her with his heavy body, while MEL tortured her nipples with yanks and bites them. And above all else, Nathaniel Black reams out her throat with balls coated by thin hair. December bucks and writhes between them, head spinning, and desperate to get more air. But that doesn't come with Black's balls bursting her mouth, and so the poor sleepy whore breathes in nothing but nuts.

DECEMBER
MMMMMF! MMMMFFFF!

RENEE
Uh, I think she's trying to say something.

Black releases his nuts from December's mouth, yet they stay connected by tentacles of spittle.

DECEMBER
I came, I really did. Yep. No question this time.

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 14h: December Belle
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
There goes last years winner, just too much sex for December for one night.

Free of her rival, Anastasia, Gloss can do what she does best. Get gangbanged! The self professed inventor of the ganbgnag, is gulping down Joey The Rat's cock, while Bosley is making mincemeat of her pussy.

Sammi as she watches this scene of debauchery with intense pleasure ripping through her soul as intense fingers rip through her pussy. Gloss's very core throbs feels her vagina tighten, so much so that she bellows a mighty roar. Even as her pussy floods with her girl cum, Bosley creams her good. Filling her fields with potent seed, Bosley makes Sammi release her own nectar from her sex. Gloss sucks harder on Joey, working the tongue and throat and a moment later hot cum flows down her throat!

SAMMI & GLOSS
We came!


~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 15h: Gloss Angieacola
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
Holy cow, a quadruple cum! Only in the OAOAST, ladies and gentlemen.

Showcasing her years of fitness skills and years of blow job skills at the same, Krista does push ups that constantly carries her mouth down and then away from Jesse Ferguson's dick. Each time she leaves behind a smoking hot string of spittle.

HOLLY
Shit, even I gotta admit I'm impressed.

RENEE
Me to, that's wi....hey is that Queen Esther walking towards the bang?

QUEEN ESTHER
Krista, Krista, your fairy god mother is present! I am ready to begin your world title match!

KRISTA
Shiiiitttt.

Queen Esther spots Krista's innovative blow job style.

QUEEN ESTHER
OH GOOD HEAVENS, WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE LORD ARE YOU DOING?!
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HOLLLY
BWAHAHHHHAHAH (beep) that bitch!

Poor Cinnamon is knee deep, ass deep, mouth deep, hands deep and pussy deep in huge pulsating rods. It may be her body, but she owns little control over what's being done to it at this point. Ice Quiz and Studderboxx are basically treating her encircled hand as a pussy to be slammed into, their thrusts doing the jerking motion instead of Cinnamon. Her pussy feels every inch of Heavy D with every shove he gives her. And the head she's forced to provide an upward shooting Tim Cash is glorious.

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When Cinnamon pulls her lips off Tim Cash she lets out this roar...

CINNAMON
I'm cumming! Great Scott!

DOC
Did someone say great Scott?

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 16th: Cinnamon Spoons
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Elsewhere Bobbi is panting like crazy while MEL and Sonic work their penises into both of Bobbi's bottom orifices. Its exhausting to be fucked so hard, but Bobbi takes it like a pro, writhing, buckling and trembling.

BOBBI
I never knew I could take weiner's this freaking big! I never freaking knew! Do it to me, you morons! Do it hard and wild!

RENEE
See, Bobbi doesn't curse. Why can't you do that?

HOLLY
(beep) you.

Then, MEL yanks Bobbi's head back by her hair and smacks her  hair, and smacks her butt.

Thwack!  Thwack!   Thwack! Thwack!   Thwack!   Thwack!   Thwack!

Bobbi cries out in agony, and it stings like crazy, yet its so hot she can't help but be thrilled by the abuse.

BOBBI
Oh Sonic! Your my favorite man-whore! My favorite!

Bobbi watches with fascination as the two men hurtle closer and closer to climax.   And then their eyes rolled up, and she feels them coming inside her, cum splashing up to her cervix and deep into her bowels!

BOBBI
Aiiyyyeeee! Give me your sticky sweet juices, because that's all you're good for!

The strength of Bosley and Mathis Golden combine to elevate Maya in the air. But more than just their hands suspend her, their cocks keep the Fuck Slut From Hell aloft. Not only that, but their thrusts, Bosley in her ass and Golden in her fuck hole, keep the teenage whore bouncing, pinging her up like a tennis ball jumping off the court.

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RENEE
Knowledgeable fans know that's Maya's favorite position.

HOLLY
Maybe she ain't so bad after all.

RENEE
But what I wanna know is where she got the hat?

Krista is once again showcasing her dancer and fitness form by taking a DP in a most odd way. With Christian Wright stuffing her asshole and Pike Pantera having her dick ridden by her milf pussy, its better if I just show you....

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KRISTA
Those are my boys, those are my boys spreading my horny tight holes. Yeah, let mama feel yor cocks, okay!

RENEE
Krista still has to wrestle in the world title match!

The Christ Air Express are taking turns on playing with Gretchen's butt. Together they kiss and nibble her butt cheeks, and then toy with her anus with the tip of their tongue, sending her towards a very unwelcome orgasm.

GRETCHEN
My weakness is being exploited! I musn't reach climax! I simply musn't!

HOLLY
You don't stand a chance, bitch! Cum now!

Annagret's legs are spread like the true cum slut she is and the teenager is struggling to think of anything else but Chick's cock that invades her ass and  cock that powers through her pussy.   She wails and moans as both pieces of fuck meat meet in her aching womb. Her body is rising fast towards climax, getting closer and closer with every bounce.

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ANNAGRET
Oh fuck yeah! You know I love those big black dicks in my tight white pussy! Fuck yes!

MARV shoves in two fingers inside Gretchen's asshole, to her anus' objection She tried to relax, but it is so hard. And yet the forced anal probing is so hot. MEL pushes his dick into her mouth, forcefully and angrily and gets all the way to the back of her tongue.   She gagged, hacks, and coughed, but the CAE does not relent.

RENEE
Man, its getting rough out here!

While Gretchen has to deal with a rough anal and oral probing, Bobbi's shit hole is battered by a  doublestuffing from Sonic JR and Brian Travis Kidd. The boys don't go in too deep, but seem to be waging war with their dicks for ownership of Bobbi's most naughty hole.

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BOBBI
HOLLLLY JUMPING!

Even with all the dick in her shitter, her anus tightens. So tight it hurts. The duo makes Bobbi feel every inch of them. Yet, it isn't long before she's bouncing up and down, feeling the dirty goodness of being violated so obscenely. The boys never miss a deep, hard thrust up her butt.   She lays atop them writhing and gasping with every stroke. 

BOBBI
AHHHHHHHH I'M CUMING! AHHHHHHHHHH!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 17th: Bobbi Cheesecake
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

FINAL FOUR: Krista Isadora Duncan, Annagret Wickedborn, Maya Duncan Blanchard, Gretchen Wright

RENEE
There's your final four! One of these Hotties will face Holly for the women's title at SluttyMania.

HOLLY
One of them is getting their ass beat.

Krista is standing at attention, sandwiched between Doc White and Jesse Ferguson, who's dicks stand at attention with Doc filling out her asshole and Jesse nesting in her pussy. The two cocks stretch the hot mommy every which way. To Krista they feel like one ginormous cock inside her, filling her up to the max and beyond.

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KRISTA
Damn, boys, power tools aren't even this big!

DOC & JESSE
:)

RENEE
She's such a sweet talker when she's having sex.

Gretchen is not being double teamed at this point. No, she is being triple teamed at this point by The Masked Mutants and Studderboxx! Bent and squashed like a trashy skank, Gretchen is made to ride the dick of Snot, with Slime plowing her asshole. Nastiest of all is Studderboxx who is taking her deep throat. His fifth thrust is down her throat, and he didn't pull back out, either.

GRETCHEN
Ugggggh!

Studderboxx's hairy, sweaty nutsack is slapping her ceaselessly in the face, as he plows deep down her throat. Even more penis arrives with the demanding presence of a horny Rizzo. With his cock slapping her in the face, Gretchen has no choice but to take hold of it, and as her body is pounded by conflicting thrusts she jerks The Rizzo off!

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HOLLY
Hhaha, this bitch is done for. She'll pass the (beep) out before she gets a chance to cum. No chance I face her at SluttyMania, no (beep)ing chance.

Maya is borrowing some of Annagret's black love as Felix Strutter and CPA are powering that long coffee colored dicks into her holes. Felix smashes downward, plunging his penis into the nether reaches of the nasty bitch's sex. CPA is even rougher, holding the poor teenager in a full nelson while firing his ram rod  into her shit pipe, unleashes holy hell and blissful heaven into her ass.

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MAYA
Ohhh, Annagret, I think I'm gonna take all the black cock from you!

ANNAGRET
You can take whatever you want, because you're my best friend. :)

Annagret's willingness to share the black cock might just be in large part due to the fact she has some great black cock with Chick driving into her asshole, and Flynn Stevens terrorizing her bomb ass pussy! The nineteen year old skank has her legs spread nice and wide, making her into a hot perverted scene for the Galaxy to jack off over. And if you can't jack off to two black dicks punishing a big titty white girl, you ain't American!'

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ANNAGRET
You're gonna do my best friend, Maya, next aren't you? Do her real good and hard like she deserves!

MAYA
Just focus on your self!

ANNAGRET
My girl is selfless as hell! Even when therre's black cock involved.

With Jo-Jo Whoa in her ass and Sonic Jr working his magic in her pussy Krista is pushed to the threshold yet again.   Her body trembles and quake, begging for that final release.   Tingly heat flows into her thighs, it flows into her chest and down her arms, and then she feels both men swell within her. She's certainly not the only feeling a swelling with viewers glued to the fifty year old whore queen taking it raw.

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KRISTA
Ohhhh shit! Here you boys cum! Cream in me! Cream in mommy, boys, cream in your mommy!

Jo-Jo's body shakes and she feels hot cum flood her poop chute.   A couple strokes later, Sonic loses control and floods her unprotected womb with hot sticky goo.

KRISTA
Ohhhh my fucking lord!

Tanned body rocking as if surging in a mosh put, the MILF slut is thrown through the throes of an epic orgasm that has her gushing her own sweet liquids and ejecting the wealth of semen that's been stashed inside her.

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated 18h: Krista Isadora Duncan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
Krista hung on to some hung studs right to the very end.

HOLLY
Not that I was worried about facing or nothing, but good riddance. Not that I cared.

RENEE
Uh-huh.

ANNAGRET
Maya, maya, we should cum together.

MAYA
What is wrong with you? That's the exact opposite point of the match!

Three cocks! Three cocks inside Gretchen at once! Bosley's in her mouth, Jesse's in her ass and Pierce's in her pussy. Not to mention her fingers are coiled around Fenrir's shaft. No longer is she a lady, now she's a pure unadulterated slut! The young beauty doesn't know if it this is pure glory or what.   It was like nothing she'd ever felt.

HOLLY
You can't last! Just spit out that dick and say I quit!

GRETCHEN
Urrrrrrrrggggggggghhhhh!

Gretchen bucked and kicks her feet against the wealth of penis that is invading her body.   She whipped her head in tight circles around Bolsey's schlong, or what she thinks is Bosley's schlong.   There's been so much penis inserted in her orifices she's not sure who's is who's. Not fitting for a lady in the least. But its oh so hot to be a gutter fuck toy for these hot studs. So hot she might cum!

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GRETCHEN
Uggggghhhhh! Uggggggh! Ugggghhhhhhhhh!

HOLLY
That's it! She's cumming!

RENEE
You don't know that!

Maya sets the benchmark of achievement for aspiring whores as a line has queued up behind her. As soon Tim Cash unloads a helping of spunk in her mouth, Sonic Jr is there to plunder her dick sucking lips with his rod. Jizzsum flows out her asshole, but that leak is soon plugged by Big Boy who adds a couple of strokes before he squirts his clam chowder into the mix.

MAYA
Mmmmmmffff! Mmmmffff!

The dirty teenage slut's semen soaked shit hole is filled up by Christian Wright, who daggers her with long strokes. Of course her pussy is getting plenty of a workout as Rayder is able to last a comparative eternity while taking violent strokes in her naughty whole.

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Sonic yanks his cock out of Maya's mouth, and the massive beast spits forth a heaping of cum onto her pretty face, and right after that Ice Quiz despoists a piping hot load of spunk onto her and Maya smiles like a good slut...

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RENEE
Aww she's adorable!

Annagret is doing her part to be a filthy whore for the delight of the world, absorbing black dick in every which way by osmosis. The mighty mite Chick Golden makes a mighty pounding of her hot asshole, filling it up with a tank of semen, then getting hard all over again to repeat the process. Warthog fucks Annagret like she's a bitch in heat, pumping hurried strokes into her fuck hole. Meanwhile a rotating cast of back dick gets sucked off by the white babydoll making her their oral bitch for the night...

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Three Hotties left, three Hotties violated, fucked, reamed and quivering around an army of cumming dicks. Its a game of mere moments at this point, and who will break at which second.

In one second two Hotties break.

MAYA and ANNAGRET
Cummmmmmmminnnngg!

RENEE
That's it! They came together! Its over!

~~~~~~~~~~~
Eliminated: Annagret Wickedborn and Maya Duncan-Blanchard
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the 2016 Lethal Bang and going to SluttyMania...

HOLLY
NO!

BUFFER
Gretchen Wright!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAA!”

ANNAGRET
We came together, Maya, that means were so made for each other.

MAYA
Do you even care that we lost?

The guys who were treating Gretchen like a two dollar just a second bring the victor to her feet. But its an unsteady rise for Gretchen as she merely falls into the arms of Ice Quiz, and enters a much needed slumber.

RENEE
Awww look at sleeping beauty.

HOLLY
NO!

RENEE
Sorry, Holly, but Posh Spice is coming for your title!

Furious at the dreaded outcome of the match, Holly storms from ringside, and is left to contemplate who she can stem the surge of Gretchen's tide.

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*** Oscar Friberg & BTK vs. OAOAST U.S. Champion Tyler Bryant & THE FLEX w/ Lorelei DeCenzo ***

Having come close a couple weeks back to regaining the OAOAST United States Championship, Oscar found himself back in the ring with the champion and the man largely responsible for that still being the case, Tyler's bodyguard Flex.

RENEE
If not for THE FLEX's actions last week we'd have a new U.S. Champion. 

COACH
At least Oscar can say he got a taste of the gold! 

Oscar pointed at his face to remind Flex he hadn't forgotten about that ::beltshot:: delivered to him. 

FLEX
:) 

TYLER & LORELEI
:lol: 

OSCAR
:angry: 

The action finally got underway with U.S. Champion Tyler and BTK putting on a fast pace display. Then Oscar got a chance to take out some frustration until a knee to the back off the ropes by Flex shifted the momentum to his and Tyler's side. Oscar would be isolated and worn down but Tyler and Flex weren't able to keep him down. The leader of Team SCREAM fought back, eventually tagging in the fresh BTK whose quick strike offense put Tyler and Flex on their heels. 

RENEE
Look at BTK go!

COACH
Kid's quicker than a hiccup! 

Spinning heel kick knocks Flex outside, but BTK gets blasted right after with a yakuza kick by Tyler. The U.S. Champ signals for the 0-100 when he's surprised by a BIRDCALL from Oscar! 

"YYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!"

As Oscar goes to drape BTK across Tyler he's tackled out through the ropes by Flex. The two brawl outside as legal men Tyler Bryant and BTK remain down inside. BTK is the first to show sign of life as Oscar backdrops Flex over the security barrier!

COACH
AAH!

Flex happens to land in the lap of a gorgeous REDHEAD in the front row. 

COACH
Wait! I know that chick. That's Rena Maria! La Muñeca -- The Doll -- in ARRIBA. She's been in commercials, soap operas and reality shows in Mexico!

RENEE
Which goes a long way to explain why she's never held the ARRIBA Women's Title. 

Oscar makes sure our VIP is okay. Unfortunately Oscsr's gesture leaves him open to attack and he gets clobbered by Flex. Flex then reaches for The Doll's purse!

THE DOLL
Hey! 

A tug of war ensues, one The Doll obviously loses. 

THE DOLL
:angry: 

Flex bitchslaps Oscar with the purse, sending it flying towards Sofa Cental. Suddenly the OAOAST Galaxy erupts as TANNER NEPTUNE storms ringside, diving over the security barrier to tackle Flex and pummel him!

COACH
What the heck?

Back inside, BTK looks to hit his Thunderstruck moonsault... but Tyler gets the knees up and delivers his 0-100 TKO for the 1-2-3. Oscar too late to breakup the pin.

Winners: Tyler Bryant & THE FLEX, via pinfall.

After the match Flex and Tanner are separated by OAOAST security. As Tyler gloats about their win Tanner checks in with The Doll (bringing back her purse) and the two share a kiss.

RENEE
Well that explains why Tanner rushed to The Doll's aid. 

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*** 6-Man Tag Title: Rico de Janeiro, Remy Brazil & Pete-O vs. "The King of Bronies" Daisuke Motozaki & The Party Brigade © w/ Amberlyn Duncan ***

Looking to prove Lucius Soul was the weak link in their group, the remaining members of Southern Immorality (Rico and Remy) came ready to fight. The same couldn't be said for their partner Pete who lurked on the apron trying to snap a boob shot of Amberlyn. 

RENEE
What a creep! No wonder Rico and Remy felt Pete was a better fit with them than Lucius!

Slapped back into reality by Remy, Pete did well when he got in the ring after his opponent had been worked over by Southern Immorality. In fact, those were the only times he was tagged in, which showed Rico and Remy understood Pete's ring skills haven't yet caught up to his party skills. But when Rico found himself in need of a tag late and Remy temporarily incapacitated, there was no choice but to tag Pete. 

COACH
AAH! Just think Dice is a young Asian hottie and pounce on that ass Pete!

Unfortunately for Pete it was he who got pounced, with Dice-M ultimately pinning him following the Rainbow Dash Mash.

Winners: Dice-M & The Party Brigade, via pinfall.

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The Lethal Bang is over and most of our Hotties are exhausted from being drilled non stopped. We see Maya sat in an elevated chair, relaxing after nearly going the distance. Alas relaxation doesn't last for long as Jade runs up to her.

JADE
Maya, I came as soon as Lucius and I were done!

MAYA
You two have been going at it this whole time? This whole time? Its been more than an hour!

JADE
Don't worry, next time you can watch us. I have a few tricks to show you.

MAYA
You have tricks to show me?

JADE
Okay, let's get you to bed so you can get some much needed rest.

MAYA
Hey, I have to watch mom's world title match!

JADE
Bed first, young lady. Let me carry you.

MAYA
I can walk myself, but I'm not going to bed at eight thirty PM!

BOBBI
(OS)
Hands off, slob-o!

Bobbi Cheesecake isn't banged out either as he runs up and brushes Jade's hand off Maya.

BOBBI
If any one is carrying Maya to bed its gonna be me!

MAYA
Fuck my life.

As expected Annagret arrives last but angriest.

ANNAGRET
Paws off, dogs, this bitch is mine to carry to bed.

MAYA
Not this shit again. Look, lets skip the part where you three have an absurd argument and go straight to the part where I get up and walk away in exapseration.

Maya gets up, but gets clawed and grabbed by all three girls, and because of that hapazard grip she falls on her left arm!

MAYA
Owwww! My elbow!

ANNAGRET
Maya, are you okay?

MAYA
Owww! My elbow!

JADE
Sister, are you alright?

MAYA
Owww! My elbow!

BOBBI
Maya, baby, how do you feel?

MAYA
What part of  “Owww! My elbow!” do you fucking dummies not understand?! Get me to the doctor!

JADE
Okay, I'll carry you!

ANNAGRET
Like hell you will. I'll carry her!

BOBBI
Back off, putz, that's my job.

MAYA
Oh fuck me, I'll just walk.

Maya gets up clutching her elbow and takes the sad walk without her bickering suitors noticing she's leaving.

 

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As Queen Esther is still recovering from seeing Krista's push up blow job, the challenger went solo.

KRISTA
My jaw hurts.

THE XFL
I wonder why.

KRISTA
Man, I'm sore. My whole body feels beat.

THE XFL
Its just me, but I bet its because of that gangbang you were just in.

KRISTA
Ohhhhh, that makes sense. Missed ya out there.

THE XFL
You did?

RHAENYS
Quit talking to her! She's trash!

RENEE
A huge world title match here, and an AngleMania rewind all in one-

COACH
This bitch called this nigga a child molester!

RENEE
And there's that.

With Rhaenys supporting him, The XFL comes face to face with his tormentor,

KRISTA
Honey, why so close? My breath smells like dick.

THE XFL
World title match, bitch, we settling this score once and for alll. You wanna throw dirt on my name? Me? The XFL the Young Wolf, Cam Newton before Cam Newton became Scam Newton.

KRISTA
What the fuck are you talking about? Who are those people?

THE XFL
Didn't you watch the damn superbowl?

KRISTA
Oh, football. I'm gonna knee you in the nuts for bringing that shitshow up.

And Krista does knee him in the nuts. Then slaps him. Then pitches him in front of Rhaenys.

KRISTA
Hey, where's your sister? Where's the cute one?

RHAENYS
Excuse me? What did you say about me?

KRISTA
Nothing, its your sister I was talking about. Pay attention, please, I don't speak for my health or entertainment of others.

RAHENYS
Xavier, KILL her!

The XFL has many reasons to go after Krista and slid back into the ring, just to get stomped out again.

RHAENYS
NO! Get back in the ring and KILL her!

KRISTA
Chill, bitch, this isn't the civil war.

RHAENYS
AGGGH! KILL HER!

The XFL endured more stomps, but this time fought back. He managed to dump Krista into the corner, and targeted her stomach with shoulder tackles then a gut buster, followed by a rare senton.

RENEE
Pulling out all the stops against the abs of steel.

The XFL taunted the Toronto crowd by rapping Meek Mill.

KRISTA
Meek over my nigga Drake? Awww hell no.

Krista superkick The XFL and slammed him against the ropes, and got a shock as he returned to nail her with a lariat!

THE XFL
Toronto your town is MY HOUSE in MY TOWN in MY WORLD! I am The Young Wolf and I am here to FEAST!

“BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

KRISTA
Why do I have to keep reminding you Robb Stark got savagely killed. In the show his baby mom's got stabbed, and yes I wish the ugly sisetr down there would meet that same fate, but I want to help you.

THE XFL
Quit telling people I fuck little Asian dudes then!

KRISTA
Honey, that was like two times.

THE XFL
We went on a syndicated talk show!

KRISTA
Look if everyone I slandered and libeled stayed mad me I'd never have any sex. So lets be friends with benefits.

RHAENYS
Kill her!

The XFL sprung at that ordered trying to hit his yakuza kick but got tied up in the ropes when he missed. Miss California slammed chops into his head, then hit a rope assisted Blonds Never Pay a cover that got a two count.

“THAT WAS THREE! THAT WAS THREE! THAT WAS THREE!”

KRISTA
Uh, no it clearly wasn't. Is rhythmic counting an unattainable skill amongst you Canadian folk.

The XFL brought himself back into action with a flurry of punches but suddenly got dropped with a snapmare, and hit with Krista's running knee strike to his seated face!

“OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!”

Krista gave these Canuck bastards far more than they deserve by jiggling this hot ass and flipping over with a moonsault.

RENEE
Krista's pretty dang amazing, she gets gangbanged for forty minutes and wrestles flawlessly for twenty.

COACH
And she'll probably fuck Alix tonight for thirty.

RENEE
True.

The XFL staggered upwards and got nailed with a KIDology that popped the crowd. But his pin saw him kickout, and push Krista back into referee Nunzio.

KRISTA
Of all the fuck ups in the world, you're going to die because I bumped you with my shoulder? I'm 140 pounds, I'm nearly fifty, stand up!

Suddenly the fans turned to ramp as the largest man in the OAOAST, MATHIS GOLDEN emerged to aid his longtime friend,

RENEE
Oh no, not Mathis Golden!

COACH
Krista been through a lot, but she's about to get put through hell!

Golden entered the ring and loaded up his fist to hammer Krista with the Heart of Golden, but through the crowd came a handsome hero, a well hung hero in a glittering white cowboy hat!

RENEE
Mister Dick!

The Human Hard On smashed his steel cup against Golden's nuts to cause him immeasurable agony!

“YYYYYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Jock tossed Krista the steel cup, which she used to wallop The XFL in the face!

RHAENYS
AHHHH! NO!

Rhaenys crumbled to her knees and sobbed as The XFL was pinned and defeated for his world title.

Winner: Krista Isadora Duncan, via pinfall

RENEE
A great match capped off with Krista winning her ninth world title after screwing god knows how many guys just a short bit ago.

COACH
Only in the OAOAST!

Not exactly the best of friends or friends at all really, Krista and Mister Dick exchange a nod of very minor respect before Jock bows out to let Krista have her moment.

RENEE
So Krista is heading back to AngleMania and Mister Dick and The XFL are headed to war! But who will win The Lethal Rumble? We'll find out in a bit!

SLUTTYMANIA 2
LIVE FROM THE TOKYO DOME
THIS MARCH!

 

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Inside a blue spotlight stands Michael Buffer, legendary ring announcer.

BUFFER
Ladies and gentlemen it is time for the 2016 Lethal Rumble!

“YYYYYYEEEEEEAAAAA!”

BUFFER
The winner will receive an OAOAST World Heavyweight Title shot at AngleMania! Now it is time for the arrival of entry number one.

All a nigga want is some of that lip service
All a nigga want is some of that lip service

“BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Striding out onto the entrance stage, huge body bathed in white lights and dressed as Willy Wonka is Big Papa Thrust! The huge specimen of a man, throws down his oversized top hat and lets out a snort and a shout of curses towards the jeering Toronto crowd.

BUFFER
Making his way to the ring, residing in Maui, Hawaii, he is “THE PHENOM-A-NOM-A-NOM” BIG PAPA THRUST!

“BBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOO!”

RENEE
One hundred percent muscle, one thousand percent man, Big Papa Thrust is gunning for his first AngleMania mainevent here tonight in Toronto.

Stepping over the ropes, Big Papa knows he has a very long road laid ahead of him. Yet he shows no concern as he drops to his knees and allows all the freaks in attendance to worship his huge arms.

BUFFER
And entry number two....

Cigarettes and tiny liquor bottles
Just what you'd expect inside her new Balenciaga
Vile romance, turned dreams into an empire
Self-made success now she rolls with Rockefellers
Survival of the richest, the city's ours until the fall
They're Monaco and Hamptons-bound but we don't feel like outsiders at all
We are the new Americana
High on legal marijuana
Raised on Biggie and Nirvana
We are the new Americana

As “New Americana” blares over  the arena sound system and Big Papa Thrust paces in the ring. A standing mirror is brought onto the stage. Its ornate with runic script, and truly a majestic sight. That is until the glass shatters, and through the gaping hole of the destroyed mirror stands a majestic sight in his own right; a blazer clad Conan “Coco” Channel! He shushes the roaring crowd, which of course doesn't work, then journeys to his ring.

BUFFER
From Los Angeles, California, he is the TMW: Revolution winner, CONAN “COCO” CHANEEEEEELLLLLL!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
Let's talk about how nervous Conan has to be, entering his first Lethal Rumble ever!

COACH
There's butterflies in his stomach. But if he pulls this off, he'll go down in history.

RENEE
Like the Flintstones!

COACH
Yabba-dabba-dooooooo!

Conan gracefully finds his way into the ring, while also ridding himself of his jack, then comes to face to face with Big Papa Thrust.

DING DING DING

BPT
You beat Gory!

CONAN
Congratulations on being observant.

BPT
Now I get to beat on you because that's what I do I beat on people I feel like beating on including other people's bad ass kids because that's what The Phenom-a-non-a-nom does. Beat on kids!

CONAN
Stop talking.

BPT tries to lift Conan into a press slam but it gets countered and Conan starts hammering BPT with forearms to the back. When those don't work he smashes him with a pair of knees to the back, that shove his foe to the ropes. He thinks he can take him out and charges, but eats a shoulder block, then suffers the humiliation of a flexing elbow drop!

“BBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

BPT
Fuck you, Toronto! Fuck your asses!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Eager to get rid of Conan, Big Papa Thrust presses him into the air!

RENEE
This might be the end for our TMW winner!

But again Conan manages to evade the attack! He then jumps up and cracks his foe with a lung blower. While Big Papa Thrust is reeling, Coco makes his way to the top turnbuckle.

RENEE
That's pretty risky!

Of the top comes Coco, nailing BPT with a diving European Uppercut!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
Daisy Dream!

The countdown begins!

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!


SEVEN!


SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!

 

THREE!


TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZT

In my hands, I hold the ashes
In my veins, black pitch drums
In my chest, if I can catch this
In my way, the setting sun
Dark clouds gather 'round me
Due northwest, the soul is bound
And I will go on ahead, free
There's a light yet to be found

 

The last pale light in the west
The last pale light in the west

Outlaw Cello emerges into the Air Canada Centre. Our third entrant slowly removes his cowboy hat, slowly adjusts his belt buckle and then makes a much faster trip to the ring.

COACH
The master of The Lasso!

Outlaw slides into the ring and begins trading hands with Coco. He overwhelms and sends him into the ropes, but gets a shock when Coco comes back to deck him with a high flipping lariat. Unluckily for Coco, BPT comes along and tosses him over the ropes.

RENEE
Oh no!

But wait! The TMW winner lands with his feet on the apron, then sling shots himself into the ring to hit both Cello and BPT with a double lariat!

COACH
Dayum~! this dude Coco is stunting.

BPT rolls away, leaving Cello to catch the brunt of his attack. The Los Angeles native tries to force Cello over the ropes, but the Outlaw fight back and snaps his neck into the ropes.

RENEE
That was dirty.

COACH
You gotta do what it takes to win in the Lethal Rumble.

Big Papa Thrust comes forward and hammers Cello with a series of punches. But Cello comes right back and hammers him with punches! Then Conan comes in and attacks them both and all three topple to the mat.

BPT
Fuck this shit! Fuck it! Fuck all this shit! And fuck Toronto! You're the worst city that could ever be so that's why I say fuck you!

“BBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!


SEVEN!


SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!

 

THREE!


TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZT

They didn't warn me
When I was running wild
The dragons breathing fire
In the backyard at night

We live in circles
And it's so hard to breathe
Maybe the same old fears
What have we here?
Don't bring me down
With you

Now I'm just chasing time
With a thousand dreams I'm holding heavy
And as we cross the line these fading beats have all been severed
Don't tell me our youth is running out
It's only just begun


“YYYYEEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Spencer Reiger rushes from the back, face gritted in resolve in spite of having an early draw.

RENEE
The Lethal Rumble just got cuter!

Spencer slides into the ring and is pounced on by Cello with stomps. The New Mexico native then launches Spencer towards BPT and Conan, and Spencer slides beneath them, comes off the ropes, rolls beneath the two again and pops up to nail Cello with a jaw breaker!

RENEE
Whew that was dizzying!

With Cello stunned, Spencer tries to dump him over the ropes, but Cello manages to avoid any elimination. Next he tries to eliminate Spencer, and manages to get his upper back over the ropes!

COACH
This dude Spencer is in danger.

But Spencer wraps his legs around Cello and throws him around with a head scissors!

RENEE
Crisis averted it looks like.

Elsewhere, Big Papa Thrust has Coco by the hair and tries to launch him over the ropes, but Conan blocks placing his hand on the turnbuckle posts. He then attacks Big Papa Thrust with a series of elbows to break his grip. Staggering away, BPT gets rocked with an inverted bulldog from Spencer!

“YYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
New York Knockout!

BPT hits the mat hard and blood starts oozing from his forehead!

“OOOOOOHHHHHHH!”

COACH
Awww man, BPT got busted open the hardway.

RENEE
And now he has to spend the match with blood dripping into his eyes.

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!


SEVEN!


SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!

 

THREE!


TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZT

The game ends here, the structures fall

Collapsing walls, I'll let you know this time

A curtain call, the final thoughts

To end it all so now you know you're mine

 

Your worst nightmare

You'll work for your soul here, and I said

It's not what you wanted

But you'll get hung, drawn and quartered in here

“BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

The giant fat deadly and very obese and very blubbery man known as Jumbo lumbers to the ring!

COACH
This dude is gonna be impossible to eliminate. Impossible!

Jumbo steps over the ropes, creating a fearsome presence within the ring. He's confronted by Coco, who slams punches into his face.

RENEE
I think even his face is to fat to be hurt.

Jumbo shoves Coco to the ground, allowing himself to fully get into the ring. But he continues to be pressured as Big Papa Thrust tries to seize him in a waist lock...but can't because his waist is too big!

BIG PAPA THRUST
You big piece of white trash! You belong in fat camp not a Lethal Rumble! Because you got a FAT ASS!

Since he can't suplex Jumbo, BPT just starts battering him with clubbing forearms. But Jumbo has a fat fucking back so he just turns around and starts trading blows with BPT. Eventually the two are thrown into a slug fest. Its a slug fest that ends when Coco and Spencer team up to dropkick Jumbo in the back, pushing him into BPT! Big Papa Thrust falls into the ropes, and nearly goes over but catches himself.

RENEE
Wow, that was pretty close.

COACH
I have a feeling we'll be saying that a lot tonight.

Big Papa Thrust is peeved and roars at the hot hunks, but he's caught with a boot to the gut by Cello. As those two do battle, Coco and Spencer have turned on each other and are trying to force one another over the ropes.

RENEE
Its like Teddy told his cousin, you can't trust anyone and that alliance fell apart quickly.

Jumbo comes along and tries to force both Coco and Spencer over the ropes. And with a great heave of his fat fucking arms he does manage to at least dump Conan over the ropes! Luckily Conan lands on the ring apron, but unluckily he has to brace himself against the stomps of Jumbo. Though the blows hit hard they don't eject Coco from the match.

TEN!

 

NINE!


COACH
I'm betting on Alix!

RENEE
Who bets on order of entry? You're worse than The Rizzo!

EIGHT!


SEVEN!


SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!

 

TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZT!


My niggas stack their money just to spend it
Cause when you die you cannot take it with you
If you ain't beefin' 'bout the
money, then what's the problem?
Don't worry about my niggas cause I got 'em
My niggas stack their
money just to spend it
Cause when you die you cannot take it with you
And if you ain't beefin' 'bout the
money, then what's the problem?
Don't worry about my niggas, Zoo I've got 'em


“YYYYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Shredding his #traplord jacket, Shayne Brave makes a dash to the ring!

RENEE
The #traplord! Coach, its gonna get real!

COACH
No it ain't.

Shayne slides into the ring and goes right up to Cello and starts slugging him in the face. The fans root #Traplord on as she snaps off a dropsault that knocks Cello through the ropes.

COACH
Leave it to Shayne to fuck that up.

RENEE
Awww be nice.

Conan comes charging at Shayne but gets rocked by a big time leg lariat!

RENEE
That's called Finessin'!


Shayne starts dabbing ala Cam Newton, thinking he's the big star of this match. But sadly Big Papa Thrust grabs a hold of him and press him high into the air!

RENEE
Oh no, Shayne!

And out goes the #Traplord, launched from the ring by a press slam into a huuuuuge throw!

“OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Shayne Brave
ELIMINATED BY: Big Papa Thrust
ELIMINATIONS: NONE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BIG PAPA THRUST
Hit the showers, twink!

Big Papa Thrust goes back to work and starts facing off with Jumbo again, this time he works over the legs with stomps and then begins to start forcing him over the ropes. Outlaw comes over, and starts to help and the two seem to be making progess. But, Jumbo suddenly wards them both off with headbutts from his oversized dome.

TEN!


NINE!

 

EIGHT!

 

SEVEN!

 

SIX!

 

FIVE!

Coco turns his head to the entrance ramp, awaiting his next foe.

FOUR!


THREE!

 

TWO!

 

ONE!

BZZZZZZZZZZZT!


“YYYYEEAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
The King of Bronies! The audience is going absolutely nuts!

Swagsuke is on the scene swagging on these bums! The fans are indeed going nuts as Motozaki makes his way to the ring full of cool jerky movements.

COACH
Damn if I had five percent of this dude's swag I'd get laid every day of my life.

Daisuke is jumped upon by Coco, who batters him with stomps and kicks.

“DAISUKE! DAISUKE! DAISUKE!”

Further Coco tries to hit his repeated double stomps on Daisuke, but the King of Bronies makes a hasty escape from the attack! Daisuke pops up and when Conan charges him the Japanese star rocks him with a  massive lariat!

“YYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

To the right of Daisuke, Big Papa Thrust is trying to force Jumbo over the ropes. But again. Jumbo is a hefty dude isn't willing to go. Or at least his girth isn't willing to go. Coming along to help, Daisuke aids BPT in getting their foe semi over the ropes. But then Jumbo lashes out with huge arms and knocks them both down!

BIG PAPA THRUST
You fucked up because your Japanese and that's what happens, all Japanese shit always breaks because it ain't made in the USA!

Not appreciating being insulted in that manner, Daisuke begins rifling punches at Big Papa Thrust. He hits him hard enough that he backs him all the way to the ropes. Then Cello comes along and smashes Big Papa Thrust with the Lasso! The Maui native tumbles over the ropes, and for a moment it looks like he might be eliminated. But he just lands on the ring apron and holds on for dear life.

TEN!

RENEE
Number eight is waiting to be released!

NINE!

 


EIGHT!

 


SEVEN!

 

Cello stomps at BPT, trying to get him off the ring apron.


FIVE!

 

FOUR!


BPT rolls back in, but has to deal with Cello's mounted punches!


THREE!

 


TWO!

 

ONE!


BZZZZZZT!

Want to bite the hand that feeds me, want to turn the tides
Set the demons free and watch 'em fly
Strike down the one who leads me, I'm gonna take his place
Gonna vindicate the human race
Better watch out 'cause I'm a war machine
Better watch out 'cause I'm a war machine


“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

RENEE
Oh no!

The giant monster known as Brock Ausstin appears with Rick Heyross singing his praises. The fans continue to pelt him with jeers as he makes his charge to the ring.

COACH
He's gonna be a problem!

Jumbo is the first to meet Brock and delivers a crushing head butt that seems to stagger Brock. But Ausstin shakes it off and smashes Jumbo with a punch that knocks him down immediately.

RENEE
A one punch knock down! You're right, Coach, he is going to be a problem.

Conan shows no fear and starts clubbing Brock in the back, which of course does little to hurt Brock. Instead the giant muscles Coco into the corner and begins lighting him with knees in the clinch. An opportunity is seen by Spencer, who leaps in and hits Brock with a dropkick. This stuns Brock for the moment, and The One Man Triple Threat tries to lift him over the ropes.

SPENCER
A little help here? Anyone?

No one comes so poor Spencer is thrown to the mat by a side belly to belly suplex!

“OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

Beyond Spencer, Cello has whipped Daisuke into the ropes. When Daisuke returns, Cello tries with a big boot but the blow is ducked and Daisuke fires off a forearm to the back of Cello's head. Cello staggers forward, and Daisuke attempts to launch him over the ropes. But Cello manages to block and a tussle occurs between the two men. That's when Brock comes along and shoves them over! But Cello lands on the apron and Daisuke skins the cat to bring himself back in!

DAISUKE
No, no, no.

“DAISUKE! DAISUKE! DAISUKE!”

Big Papa Thrust is ready to press slam Spencer out of the ring, but the New Yorker manages to slide out and escape BPT's hold. Angered Big Papa Thrust turns around ready to floor Spencer, but gets smacked by a knee from Coco who leapfrogged over Spencer!

RENEE
Pretty innovative from the TMW: Revolution winner!

TEN!

 

NINE!


EIGHT!

No friendly partnership between Conan and Spencer as they begin trading kicks and punches


SEVEN!

RENEE
We're waiting on number nine!

SIX!


FIVE!

Jumbo tries to take out both Coco and Spencer, but they team up and level him with a double dropkick!


FOUR!


THREE!


TWO!


ONE!

BZZZZZZZT!

Cue:: Simply Ravishing

OAOAST GALAXY
:o

RENEE
Hey, wait, it can't be? Can it?!

Yes it is, Renee! Tony Brannigan, the body, OAOAST Hall of Famer and legend appears on the entrance stage!

COACH
Is Tony Brannigan gonna enter the rumble?!

Brannigan slaps hands with the fans as he makes his way to his way to the Lethal Rumble!

RENEE
This will be Tony Brannigan's first Lethal Rumble in nearly a decade, Coach. This is amazing!

COACH
What kind of shape is he in? He's the ninth man in and he has to last to the end. At his age?

Brannigan steps into the ring and takes a deep breath, soaking in the atmosphere, the sweat, the grime, the beauty of being back inside an OAOAST ring. And then he's clubbed in the back by Cello! The Outlaw then nails him with a Six String backbreaker that leaves him in a world of hurt!

“BBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

COACH
See what I mean?

Stomping away at Brannigan, Cello sees an easy target to remove from the ring. He picks The Body off the mat, and tries to force him out near the corner. Brannigan starts to go over the ropes, and the fans are horrified to see the Legend's time in the match come to an early end. But suddenly Brannigan starts filing elbows into Cello's body and head to back him away. Cello is stunned but to far now for Brannigan to take advantage.

RENEE
It'd be a pretty big deal for Cello to eliminate a Hall of Famer.

Brannigan gets help from his cousin, Conan as Coco shoves Cello forward. This brings him into The Body's arms and he uses a back body drop to launch Cello out of the ring and eliminate him!

“YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Outlaw Cello
ENTERED: 2nd
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 2nd
ELIMINATED BY: Tony Brannigan
ELIMINATIONS: NONE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
How about that, Coach? The old man eliminated Cello!

As Cello is furious on the outside, Brannigan daps up cousin Conan for a job well assisted.

“TONY THE BODY! TONY THE BODY! TONY THE BODY!”

COACH
If anyone deserves to soak up the spotlight its Brannigan.

Daisuke and Brock are battling it out, trying to get each other over the ropes. When that doesn't work for either, Daisuke rifles off a headbutt then smashes Brock with a trio of forearms. He comes off the ropes, looking for a lariat, but Brock springs forward and grounds him with a tackle! Pleased with himself, Brock jumps up and does the HAPPY HOSS DANCE~!

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!


SEVEN!

RENEE
Get your guesses ready for number ten!


SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!

COACH
After Brannigan it could be anyone. Even Virgil, again!

RENEE
I'm gonna say no on that one.

THREE!

 

TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZY!

This is survival of the fittest
This is do or die
This is the winner takes it all
So take it all


“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

The Orange Country Cobra rips off his bandanna and blazes a trail to the ring!

RENEE
Awww hell yeah! Its Ned Blanchard!

Blanchard arrives into the ring and raises hell by smashing Big Papa Thrust with a Lou Thez Press!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Blanchard beats down Big Papa then jumps up to deck Jumbo with a left haymaker!

RENEE
Can you tell Ned's been itching to get into this match?

While Ned stomps a mudhole in Jumbo, Brock is battering Brannigan in the corner. After beating him with knees to the stomach, he tosses the OAOAST Hall of Famer into the center of the ring, landing him in a heap.

COACH
Brock, man, you should have tossed him out of the ring!

Brannigan steels his resolve and comes after Brock, but is promptly beaten down. But he's only beaten down beneath the ropes, thus saving him from an elimination. Brock turns his attention to Spencer, but acts to slowly as he gets booted in the gut! Spencer then latches him into a double underhook that pops the crowd. He can't get off his finisher as Brock back drops him over the ropes! But, Spencer lands on the ring apron, and makes a hurried run up to the top turnbuckle.

RENEE
That's risky, Spencer!

Brock comes after Spencer, forcing the Manhattan native to leap over him and take down Blanchard with a crossbody block! Still wanting Spencer to suffer, Brock rushes at him, but is blindsided by a high knee from Daisuke! Daisuke then showboats big time by doing the HAPPY HOSS DANCE~!

“DAISUKE! DAISUKE! DAISUKE!”

Seeing easy pickings in a downed Ned, Jumbo tries to force him out of this match. However, Blanchard responds by battering him with punches directly to the nose, then just plain cracks him across the jaw with a  dropkick. Jumbo falls into the corner and is once again forced to have a mudhole stomped into him!

TEN!


NINE!

 

EIGHT!

 

SEVEN!


RENEE
We're on number eleven!


SIX!

 

FIVE!


Daisuke and Brannigan trade punches with Brannigan holding his own against the six man champion.


FOUR!


THREE!

 

TWO!

 

ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!


THE DAY IS MY ENEMY, THE NIGHT MY FRIEND!


“”YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

The viscous vampire known as Colin Maguire Junior saunters onto the stage, tossing his hoodie off to reveal a body honed to supernatural perfection and a face with a sneer for the world.

RENEE
Colin Maguire Jr has to be a bunch of people's favorite to win this match.

Conan confronts Colin the moment he enters the ring, slamming stomps into his back. These blows do zero damage and Colin merely rises upright.

COLIN
You are very lucky your Theodore's cousin, otherwise your insolent attack on me would end very poorly. As it stands I'll merely remove you from my sight.

With a grip on Coco's throat Colin has little trouble in simply forcing him over the ropes to eliminate him!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Coco Chanel
ENTERED: 2nd
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 3rd
ELIMINATED BY: Colin Magurie Junior
ELIMINATIONS: NONE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All Daisuke does is gingerly step into Colin's vantage point, and that's more than enough for The Irish Golden Boy to grab him by his funky haircut and send him flying over the ropes!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Daisuke Motozaki
ENTERED: 7th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 4th
ELIMINATED BY: Colin Magurie Junior
ELIMINATIONS: NONE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
Don't get in Colin's way if you know what's good for you.

COACH
He's clearing dudes out!

Next in Colin's warpath is Brock Ausstin, and the giant is no match for a vampire! Colin throws Brock over the ropes!


But wait! Brock catches himself on the top rope and hangs on for dear life.

COLIN
Now you've turned yourself into a very large sitting duck.


Colin rocks Brock with a thundering kick to the head, and though it hurts, it causes Brock to fall back into the ring.

RENEE
Brock has to have a four leaf clover and a rabbit's foot in his trunks.

Beyond Colin, Brannigan is doing battle with Ned Blanchard, both men slugging it out in the corner.

RENEE
Talk about a fight between mythic legends, Ned Blanchard versus Tony Brannigan!

“LET'S GO BLANCHARD!
LET'S GO BRANNIGAN!
LET'S GO BLANCHARD!
LET'S GO BRANNIGAN!”

Looking for an easy target, Jumbo comes in with a massive charge. But Blanchard and Brannigan step to opposite sides and Jumbo slams his gut into the turnbuckle posts!

JUMBO
OOOMPH!

The legends then combine forces and drill Jumbo with a double lariat!

TEN!

 

NINE!


EIGHT!


RENEE
Number twelve set to arrive, and we've still got a long way to go. Settle in, guys!


SEVEN!

 

SIX!

 

FIVE!

BPT takes on Spencer, trying to use his strength to force him over the ropes. However, Spencer blocks and batters BPT with chops.

FOUR!

 

THREE!

 

TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!


You know I'm bringing bombastic
I'm feeling fucking fantastic
Turn up the music yeah blast it
You know I'm playing like, no more Mr. Nice Guy


You know I'm bringing bombastic
I'm feeling fucking fantastic
Turn up the music yeah blast it
You know I'm playing like, no more Mr. Nice Guy
I'm coming for you


“YYYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAA!”

Wearing bunny ears for some reason, Alix makes a bunny hop to towards the Lethal Rumble!

RENEE
She has sex like a rabbit and fights like a shark, she's The Hollywood Bad Girl and five time world champion, Alix Maria Spezia!

ALIX
Its a meeeee.....Mario! Mario on these nuts, nigga, stomping your bitch ass like a Goomba.

Unfortunately Alix has said while outside the ring, so no one is really intimidated. Anyway, Colin and Ned are getting into it, with Blanchard trying to hold his own against the vampire. Blanchard lifts Colin up by the legs, thinking he can simply dump him over the ropes. But Colin shifts his weight and then clobbers Blanchard with a high angle DDT.

COACH
That was almost like a brain buster right there.

Brock and BPT are in a war that comes to a close when Brock grabs hold of BPT and uses a vertical suplex to throw him into the turnbuckle posts. Ausstin then seizes hold of an entering Alix in a front facelock. From there he puts her atop the turnbuckle and the fans begin to panic for her safety.

COACH
Gonna be Alix's shortest time in this Rumble.

Brock starts to climb to the height of the ring with Alix, when The Hollywood Bad Girl suddenly catches him with a flipping neckbreaker that hauls the big man down to the mat!

ALIX
THERE WILL BE BLOOD! PERIOD BLOOD!

COACH
Eww dat nasty as fuck.

Alix runs across the ring and smashes Jumbo with a running knee that dazes the fat ass! Then she goes back to the ropes and hammers Jumbo again, blasting him with a knee! And again and on this thrid time Jumbo becomes tangled into the cables. Finally Alix gives it her all...

ALIX
(with a flying kick)
HI-YAH JAPANESE WRESTLING FEDERATION NOW DEFUNCT!

And her big kick sends all that massive biker fat toppling out of the match!

“YYYYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Jumbo
ENTERED: 5th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 5th
ELIMINATED BY: Alix Maria Spezia
ELIMINATIONS: NONE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
There's a big obstacle removed from the match-

COACH
By a big drug addict!

RENEE
Don't go saying mean stuff. The Lethal Rumble is about love.

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TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!

COACH
What number is this?

RENEE
Thirteen, mister don't keep track of anything

SEVEN!


SIX!

Ned is pounding Spencer's back in the corner, but The One Man Triple threat refuses to go over.


FIVE!

 

FOUR!


THREE!

 

TWO!


ONE!

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

And our people talk to me, but nothing ever hits,
So people talk to me, and all the voices just burn holes.
I’m going in (ooh)

This is the start of how it all ever ends
They used to shout my name, now they whisper it
I’m speeding up and this is the
Red, orange, yellow flicker beat sparking up my heart
We rip the start, the colors disappear
I never watch the stars there’s so much down here
So I just try to keep up with them
Red, orange, yellow flicker beat sparking up my heart

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Lorde's “Yellow Flicker Beat” rolls into the arena and summons the New York native known as Silver. The Menagerie member puffs out his white hair and flashes a manic smile before charging to the ring.

ALIX
KILL WHITEY!

Alix doesn't kill whitey but she does soar through the ropes with a suicide dive to take out Silver!

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” the Canadian crowd sings.

The referee's gather around Alix trying to get her to stop bashing on Silver. To no avail of course as Alix wails away with murderous intent.

RENEE
Look at Alix go, everyone, she's going to every town on the map!

Meanwhile in the actual Rumble, Ned has Spencer in the corner in a dangerous spot. With one heaving shove, he gets him over the ring posts and seemingly out of the ring. But, Spencer holds onto the ring posts and keeps himself suspended in mid air!

RENEE
Wow! I've honestly never seen that before.

COACH
Me neither, that's crazy.

Spencer uses his strange grip on the ring apron to pull himself back inside and away from elimination. He's immediately attacked by Big Papa Thrust, showing there's no rest for the weary in the Lethal Rumble! However, Spencer gets some help as Tony Brannigan tries his hand at eliminating Big Papa Thrust.

COACH
Brannigan trying to take BPT by surprise. If he fucks up he's gonna have a problem.

And there is a problem as Big Papa Thrust doesn't even go anywhere near over the ropes. Instead he hangs Brannigan in them and that rocks him with a lethal lariat! The attack dumps Brannigan over the ropes and provides his elimination!


But wait! Brannigan has held onto the ropes, and only one foot has touched the floor! Thus, The Body is able to pull himself back into the ring and keep on fighting!

“YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
Ya know what, Coach, Tony could maybe win this!

COACH
There's still a long way to go.

TEN!

 

NINE!

 

EIGHT!


RENEE
The mystery returns! Who could be coming out next?


SEVEN!


SIX!

 

FIVE!

 

FOUR!


THREE!

 


TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZT!

We are crawling along
At the edge of the world
Dance beneath the borders
Bring fences to fall
We seize the day
We own the night
Lets move measured and slow
Walk until the crimson shows

We taste honey, we smell blood
Raise your fists, open your hearts
We taste honey, we smell blood
Raise your fists

WE ARE THE NEXT ONES TO COME
YOU WON'T TAKE US DOWN
WE ARE THE NEXT ONES TO COME
YOU WON'T TAKE US DOWN

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Blaine discards both e-cig and trench coat, before raising a fist to the roaring fans and taking off to the ring.

RENEE
I don't like to predict things, but I've got to say Blaine's got a great chance of winning this match. He seems to do everything perfectly.

COACH
Including his sister!


As Blaine enters the ring, he takes the fight to Brock who was beating on Cello. Meanwhile, Colin and Ned are squaring off with Blanchard wailing away on Colin. With the vampire teetering, The Orange County Cobra comes off the ropes with a lariat! But Colin tries to bring him down with a crossface! However, Ned escapes by rolling through. Sadly he comes up too close to the ropes for his own good and all Colin needs is a well placed dropkick to send him flying to the outside!

RENEE
Ned is gone!

COACH
That's a big elimination!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Ned Blanchard
ENTERED: 10th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 6th
ELIMINATED BY: Colin Maguire JR
ELIMINATIONS: NONE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
And that's three knocked out for Colin.

Alix and Silver have found their way into the ring, but are right at the edge, near the ropes.

BLAINE
Easy pickings it seems like.

Spencer agrees and he and Blaine give the fighting duo a shove....a shove right over the ropes and out of the match!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Alix Maria Spezia
ENTERED: 12th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 7th
ELIMINATED BY: Spencer Reiger
ELIMINATIONS: Jumbo
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Silver
ENTERED: 13th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 8th
ELIMINATED BY: Blaine Cayley
ELIMINATIONS: NONE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

However, Alix and Silver barely register they've been eliminated and keep their war going outside! This forces the officials from backstage to come and separate the duo, and basically carry them backstage.

ALIX
Hell no! I wan't go! Hell no! I won't go!

Alix breaks free of her captors and leaps onto Silver, tackling him and all his handlers to the ground!

“YYYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
Forget Django unchained its Alix unchained!

Now even more officials have to arrive to still this raging fire, and so twenty people have to cart off one forty eight year old woman and one cruiserweight man!

COACH
Shit gets crazy in the Rumble!

RENEE
Especially when you involve people like Alix and Silver!

TEN!

 

NINE!

 

EIGHT!

 

SEVEN!

RENEE
I doubt its going to get any calmer with number fifteen coming up.


SIX!

 

FIVE!

 

FOUR!

 

THREE!

 


TWO!

 

ONE!

BBZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Give it to me, give it to me!

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

COACH
Awww shit here he  come!

Yes, yes, the United States Champion is on the scene! The Canadian fans greet him with a blast of heat but he is all million dollar smile, as he pulls down his sunglasses.

TYLER
Mmmph, too bright!

And the shades go back on!

RENEE
How arrogant can you be?

As Tyler makes his way ringside the battle rages inside as Brock is pounding on Colin in the corner. This only last for so long before Colin starts smashing him with body blows that back him to the center of the ring. Brock takes aim with a  lariat more as defensive move, but Colin shifts behind him and then throws him across the ring with an Irish Suplex!

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!'

Tyler, having entered the ring, sees an opening and tries to throw Colin over the ropes. Tries and fails horribly!

COLIN
Just what do you think you are doing?

TYLER
Hey, man, I'm just playing with you. Having a good time. Its all jokes.

Colin doesn't think its funny and starts battering Tyler with forearms. The blows beat Tremendous Tyler to the ground, forcing him to duck out of the ring for safety!

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Annoyingly Colin can't go after him as Brock returns to club him in the back. Elsewhere, Spencer and Brannigan are having it out with the much younger Spencer, trying to force Brannigan over the ropes.

COACH
I can't believe The Body has latest this long.

Brannigan holds on and eventually finds his footing. He then turns the tables on Spencer by throwing him into the corner, and then charging in with a corner lariat. Spencer sinks to the mat, meaning he can't be eliminated, but Brannigan still lays into him with stomps. That is until Blaine nails him with a crossarm side Russian leg sweep!

RENEE
Song for a Sad Girl!

Blaine picks up Brannigan and starts to get him over the ropes, but realizes he's dealing with a large man.

BLAINE
Any plans on helping, Spencer?

SPENCER
You could just ask.

Spencer joins in Blaine and together they get Brannigan over the ropes...but only onto the ring apron! The duo proceed to lay into him with stomps, but still Brannigan finds his way back into the ring.

RENEE
Tony Branngian is a survivor!

COACH
Just like Destiny's Child!

RENEE
Taking it way back with that reference.


TEN!

 

NINE!

EIGHT!


SEVEN!


SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!


TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

The game ends here, the structures fall

Collapsing walls, I'll let you know this time

A curtain call, the final thoughts

To end it all so now you know you're mine

 

Your worst nightmare

You'll work for your soul here, and I said

It's not what you wanted

But you'll get hung, drawn and quartered in here

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

The tatted monster, Deuce Deuce Bigelow, brings his hefty weight and mean disposition to the rumble.

COACH
My pick! My pick!

Deuce slides into the ring and wallops Blaine across the face with a headbutt. Then he drops Spencer with a shuffle side kick. Big Papa Thrust makes a charge for him and gets flipped over with a big back body drop!

DEUCE
RAAAAWWWWWRRRRR!

“BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Colin isn't so impressed and starts flinging punches at Deuce. The BUSTLE TUFF champion fight back and the two men begin a brawl in the center of the ring. Its cut short when Brock spears Deuce in the back, bowling him right into Colin, creating a terrible collision of bodies!


“OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!”

Brock comes up first, and begins the happy Hoss dance. Its cut promptly short by a yakuza kick from Tyler that throws the giant grappler into the ropes! Star67 then begins the process of trying to take Brock out of this match. Its a short process as Tyler gets the feeling this huge human isn't going anywhere.

TYLER
(patting Brock on the shoulder)
Gonna leave you to it, big guy.

RENEE
This guy has some nerve.

Deuce is currently standing on Tony Brannigan's head. I repeat, standing on Brannigan's head. The pain is indescribable and immeasurable for Brannigan who transmits it as howls.

COACH
Don't you wish you stayed retired, Tony B?

Thinking he's worn Brannigan down, Deuce pulls him up with mind on elimination. But Brannigan comes to life and makes a desperate yank on Deuce's pants  that throw him onto the middle ropes. Hung up and dizzied by the sudden strike, Deuce has no defense from Blaine who springboards off the turnbuckle and delivers a double stomp to his back!

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Brannigan gives a thumbs up to Blaine, and because Blaine has at least a modicum of kindness he refrains from superkicking the old man like he had planned. Instead he turns around and bumps into.....Tyler Bryant.

BLAINE
Just the guy I wanted to see.

TYLER
Really? I'm the US Champion, future AngleMania maineventer, what's to stop me from yakuza kicking your head to Japan?

BLAINE
People have been swinging at me for years and they always seem to miss.

Tyler feigns laughter, a play that pushes him into a surprise forearm that's expertly blocked by Blaine.

BLAINE
Care to try again.

Tyler's face reddens with fury and he bounces off the ropes, this time firing off his Yakuza kick, that misses due to Blaine ducking. Instead it smacks Colin flush in the face and Colin is not happy with it.

COLIN
Did I not chastise you once before? What shall it take to get you to leave me be?!

Colin grabs hold of Tyler by his gelled hair and launches him over the ropes!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAA!”

The fans joy is premature as Tyler has caught his right foot on the bottom rope!

RENEE
Wow! That's pure luck by Tyler!

COACH
The man upstairs is looking out for Star67.

With Colin having turned his attention to fighting Deuce, Tyler is able to pull himself back into the ring. There he takes deep breathes and thanks the stars above his future is still bright.

TEN!


NINE!

 

EIGHT!

 

SEVEN!

 

SIX!

RENEE
We're waiting for our 17th entrant!

FIVE!


THREE!

 

TWO


ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Ya, You never said a word
You didn’t send me no letter
Don’t think I could forgive you

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOO!”

Full of boasts and promises for victory, Logan strolls to the ring, shouting to be heard over the disdainful audience.

RENEE
A fresh Mann for the rumble. Hehe.

COACH
I don't get it.

RENEE
Come on, Coach.

Logan sees Tyler sagged against the ropes, and tries for an easy elimination. The problem is Tyler is well healed and fights off Logan. No on the back pedal Logan tries to throw a wicked left hook, but Tyler goes low and levels him to the mat with a basement dropkick. Star67 then runs the ropes and comes back to drop a flipping leg on the back of Logan's neck, leaving Logan in serious pain already.

RENEE
Not the best of starts for Logan Mann, the final entrant eliminated last year.

Big Papa Thrust throws Brannigan into the ropes, and then sends him flying overhead with a back body drop. Brannigan hits the mat with crushing impact and reaches to his back as he groans in agony.

BIG PAPA THRUST
You're finished Tony The Body, now I call you Tony The White Trash because that's exactly what you are, a piece of white trash and not a genetic specimen of manliness and sexual drive like me.

Big Papa Thrust picks up Brannigan and begins choking him on the ropes. With no real rules in this match, the officials can't do much more then plead with BPT to cease his abuse. After several seconds of tormenting Brannigan. the Maui native hits the ropes, looking to push Brannigan out of the ring with a lariat. But, much to BPT's horror and dismay, Brannigan lowers the ropes and causes BPT to fall out of the ring!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Big Papa Thrust
ENTERED: 1st
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 9th
ELIMINATED BY: Tony Brannigan
ELIMINATIONS: Shayne Brave
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
What an amazing run by Tony Brannigan! Let's give it up to him right now.

COACH
I don't know how this dude is doing it, but he's doing it and he's doing it well.

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!


SEVEN!

RENEE
Number eighteen, a pretty decent draw.

SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!


TWO!


ONE!

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Time will destroy everything

Time will destroy everything

Time will destroy everything

Time will destroy everything

 

Oh, the world is rough

It's just like hoping it will swallow you right up

And know that you're awake

The clock is ticking and it won't stop, it don't stop

“YYYYYYYEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Ivar steps onto the entrance stage, adjusting his wrist tap and gazing impassively at the crowd. His run is anything but as he makes a hard sprint to the ring.

RENEE
Here's a guy who I think is on the cusp of winning the world title.

Ivar enters the ring and is immediately attacked by Deuce. The monster throws a wave of headbutts that have Ivar sagged against the ropes. Sagged but not out, as Ivar shocks Deuce by simply grabbing him into a fireman's carry! Deuce doesn't even have a moment to fight out before Ivar flips him over and out of the ring!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Deuce Deuce Bigelow
ENTERED: 16th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 10th
ELIMINATED BY: Ivar The Cunning
ELIMINATIONS: None
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
There goes Coach's pick.

Elsewhere, Spencer is throwing down with Logan near the ropes. He wear Leezus Price down and then sucks him into the makings of a Reiger Counter. But before he can properly hook the arms, Logan delivers a lethal low blow!

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOO!”

Spencer howls in agony and Blaine sees his predicament. Yet before he can reach Spencer, Logan pitches him over the ropes!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

BLAINE
Well now that was a mistake.

And Blaine fires off a wild uppercut that lands with such horrifying impact that is hurls Logan out of this match and possibly into the ER!

“YYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Spencer Reiger
ENTERED: 4th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 11th
ELIMINATED BY: Logan Mann
ELIMINATIONS: Alix Maria Spezia
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Logan Mann
ENTERED: 17th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 12th
ELIMINATED BY: Blaine Cayley
ELIMINATIONS: Spencer Reiger
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TEN!


NINE!

RENEE
Knock two out and let number nineteen come in.

EIGHT!


SEVEN!


SIX!

COACH
We got some big names still waiting to enter this thing.

FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!

 

TWO!

 

ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Hell's where I was born! Hell's where I was raised,
This hell is where I'm from and this hell is where I'll stay.
The hush is all I need to hush the misery;
The hush that belongs to me, like the hush inside a dream
Just be still and pray
And let the noise just fade away.

COACH
Who's music is that?

RENEE
I don't know, Coach, we've never heard it before, I have an Apple Music playlist and this isn't on it!

With the entrance doors parted, the anticipation builds to its height, and the fans are shocked to see the grizzled TURBOWOLF step forward.

RENEE
Turbowolf?! I really didn't think we'd see him on the main roster with his attitude.

COACH
Shit, a werewolf got almost as good a chance at winning this match as a vampire.

After heaving a wad of spit onto the floor, TurboWolf makes his charge to the ring. After sliding inside, he brings up his lanky body and blasts Blaine with a  hard right hand. The Lion is knocked into the corner, but comes roaring back TurboWolf. However, the Louisiana native catches him with a  powerslam!

RENEE
The Lion is no match for a werewolf right now.

Colin comes up to TurboWolf and starts rocking him with Irish uppercuts. TurboWolf is staggered, but soon starts fighting back with hard closed fists.

RENEE
Werewolf versus vampire in the Lethal Rumble!

The Irish Golden Boy is shot into the ropes, and then caught with a Triple H style face crusher from TurboWolf that would fell a normal soul. As Colin isn't normal he stumbles about the ring, until Tyler catches hold of him and tosses him over the ropes!

RENEE
Colin-

Hooks himself onto the middle ropes before his final descent out of this match!

“YYYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

TurboWolf is caught looking and gets lariated over the ring cables by Brock! However, he to saves himself from elimination by hanging onto the ropes with every bit of strength in his supernatural body. Giving up rather quickly, Brock turns around and gets rocked by a vicious lariat from Brannigan!

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHH!”

COACH
What part of his ass did he pull that out of?!


TEN!

 

NINE!

 

EIGHT!


RENEE
A very good number to draw with number twenty itching to get to the ring.


SEVEN


SIX!


RENEE
Lots of talent left to come like Leon Rodez, Bohemoth, Teddy Buckworth and more.

FIVE!

 

FOUR!

 

THREE!

 


TWO!

 


ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Oh, what a cold, dark world it is to walk through
Alone with a fear-filled head
Thinking of losing you is a haunted song
And a dread much worse than the fear of death

Now I feel the fear rising up
Climbing up, taking over my body
And I feel my pulse starting up
Waking me again

Open my eyes, I'm reaching for you
Set me on fire, set me on fire
I'm burning inside, I'm waiting for you
Set me on fire, set me on fire

“YYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Discarding his leather coat to the wayside, Oscar Friberg comes roaring to the ring!

RENEE
He's not the biggest man in the match, but Oscar Friberg is one of the toughest!

Friberg hauls himself into the ring just as Colin is starting to climb back, so to take advantage of that Oscar hammers him with a superkick! Once again Colin is forced to latch onto the ropes to prevent himself from a harsh end. Brannigan soon comes in to try and eliminated Colin, but gets hooked into a front facelock by the vampire. From there, Colin seeks to lift Brannigan out of this rumble with a suplex.

RENEE
Again, Tony The Body is in big trouble!

But Brannigan fights furiously with punches and somehow breaks the supernatural's clutches!

RENEE
And again he saves himself! You go, Tony!

Brock has grabbed TurboWolf into a standing fireman's carry and seeks to flip him straight to the gates of hell! Or straight to the outside if you prefer. But as he nears the edge of the ring, Turbwolf makes the escape from his clutches. Thrown off balance by TurboWolf's counter, Brock lurches forward and that's all TW needs to grab onto his legs and dump him over the ropes!

“YYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
TurboWolf tossed out Brock Ausstin! Coach, that's crazy!

COACH
He wasn't even supposed to be on the main roster and here he is tossing out Brock!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Brock Ausstin
ENTERED: 8th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 13th
ELIMINATED BY: TurboWolf
ELIMINATIONS: none
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TurboWolf roars into the Toronto crowd, celebrating his immense coup over Brock. Little does he know that Tyler Bryant is bouncing on his feet behind him.

RENEE
Look out, Turbo!

TW turns around and gets smashed in the face by Tyler's superkick! Its powerful enough to propel him over the ropes and end his time in this match!


~~~~~~~~~~~
 ELIMINATED: TurboWolf
ENTERED: 19th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 15th
ELIMINATED BY: Tyler Bryant
ELIMINATIONS: Brock Ausstin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
Not a bad showing by TurboWolf though.

TEN!


NINE!

 

EIGHT!

 

SEVEN!

 

EIGHT!


RENEE
With twenty one on his way, we're nearing the end of the draws.


SEVEN!

 

SIX!

 

FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!

 

TWO!


ONE!


BBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Tearing me apart with words you wouldn't say,
And suddenly tomorrow's a moment washed away.
'Cause I don't have a reason, and you don't have the time,
But we both keep on waiting for something we won't find.

The light on the horizon was brighter yesterday,
With shadows floating over, the scars begin to fade.
We said it was forever but then it slipped away,
Standing at the end of the final masquerade.

The final masquerade!

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

The entrance doors spread apart and from them comes King Landon Maddix escorted by Prince AC The Exile. The crown prince is happy to remove his king's robe and wishes the snooty regent bon chance before sending him to his ring.

RENEE
King Landon is the winner of many, many SWF Clusterfuck's in his long illustrious career but he has never won a Lethal Rumble.

King Landon surveys the scene as he makes a royal stride to the ring, in no hurry to enter the festivities. As he takes his leisurely time, Ivar is starting to push Blaine over the ropes. But Blaine comes down on his feet, and then stuns Ivar with a neckbreaker that drops the vampire onto the ropes and sends him bouncing backwards.

RENEE
Yikes! That was nasty!

Blaine leaps into the ring, trying to use a springboard attack on Ivar. However, Tyler slams a superkick into him to knock him off course!

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!”

With Blaine dazed and wounded by the strike, Tyler tries to pitch him over the ropes, but Blaine again comes down on his feet to avoid disaste. Star67 can't follow up on that attack as he's soon thrown under fire from Oscar's attacks!

“OSCAR! OSCAR! OSCAR!” the fans sing.

COACH
Oscar should have let Tyler take out Blaine.

RENEE
Old grudges die hard.


King Landon finally enters the ring, and begins rifling forearms to Tony Brannigan's face. The Body wilts under the attack, leading the King to think he's easy pickings. But when King Landon comes off the ropes, Brannigan surprises him with a diving lariat!

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
The Body has been in this match longer than anyone and he's still going strong.

COACH
What the hell has he been drinking?

TEN!

 

NINE!

 

EIGHT!

 

SEVEN!

 

SIX!


Brannigan tries to pick King Landon up to lift him out of the ring, but King Landon won't allow that to happen so easily.


FIVE!

 

FOUR!


THREE!

 

TWO!


ONE!


BBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTT!

We're riding down the boulevard
We're riding into the dark night, night
With half the tank and empty heart
Pretending we're in love, when it's never enough
As the silence filled the lonely air
Oh, they can hear now now now baby
We see a storm is closing in,
Pretending we're escaping
 
Don't say a word while we danced with the devil
You brought the fire to a world so cold
We're out of time on the highway to never
Hold on (hold on), hold on (hold on)
Don't say a word while we danced with the devil
You brought the fire to a world so cold
We're out of time on the highway to never

Hold on (hold on), hold on (hold on)

There isn't a soul in the arena happy to see Al Houd step into the forefront. He, however, dismisses them with a sneer and a wave and heads to the ring with haunting eyes set on Blaine Cayley.

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BLAINE
Put some speed to it, Al Houd, I've been waiting since entry 14 to kick your ass, mate!

Al Houd doesn't take kindly to that attack and hauls ass into the ring, just the same time as PHECADA appears from outside to attack Blaine from behind!

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

RENEE
Excuse my Holly, but that's bull(beep)!

With Phecda stomping away at Blaine, Al Houd enters and joins the fray. Together the PYM do a terrible number on poor Blaine with no one to aid him.

“BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!”

AL HOUD
To hurt Melissa...

PHECDA
Your punishment will be forever.

Joining forces to lift Blaine up they carry them to edge of the ring and promptly dump him over to the fans great disgust

“BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Blaine Cayley
ENTERED: 14th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 16th
ELIMINATED BY: Al Houd
ELIMINATIONS: Silver, Logan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
Blaine got cheated big time!

One person who doesn't feel much sympathy for Blaine is Tyler who has a good laugh at Blaine's suffering. In fact he even gives Al Houd a celebratory pat on the back.


Then he tosses him out of the match!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED: Al Houd
ENTERED: 22nd
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 17th
ELIMINATED BY: Tyler Bryant
ELIMINATIONS: Blaine Cayley
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TYLER
Night, night.

RENEE
Not that I care about Al Houd but that's pretty dirty of Tyler.

The ring is a little less crowded now, but the war rages on as Ivar is pushing Branning over the ropes.

RENEE
Tony Brannigan at age 50 something has been in here longer than anyone.

COACH
Age 50 ain't nothing, Ivar is a thousand years old.

RENEE
And a vampire. And frozen at age 30.

Brannigan is dumped over the ropes, but manages to catch himself on the second rope, and use his legs to get a life saving tangle.

RENEE
He did it again, Tony Brannigan avoided elimination!

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!


SEVEN!

RENEE
We're on number twenty three, Coach.

COACH
A damn good draw to get.

SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!


TWO!


ONE!

Bruh, I see, girls everywhere

Titties, ass, hands in the air, it's a party over here

Shake it for the man of the year

Uh, man of the year, man of the... bounce

“BBBBBOOOOOOOOO!”

COACH
DA MAN~!

The Beast, perhaps the most feared man in this match, storms to the ring with eyes on advancing to AngleMania.

RENEE
Bohemoth's story is well none. He can't get a world title shot until 2017 thanks to losing to The XFL, but he can cheat that stipulation by winning the Lethal Rumble.

The Man enters the ring and delivers incredible damage right away by drilling King Landon with a STIFF LARIAT

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!”

Oscar comes under fire from Bohemoth and is wiped out by another STIFF LARIAT~!

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!”

Brannigan makes a charge at Bohemoth, testing his luck. Its a test that fails with Bohemoth drilling him with a deadly spinebuster!

“OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!”

BOHEMOTH
I'M THE MAN!

“BBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

The Beast seeks more prey to devour, and his onyx eyes come upon Ivar The Cunning.

BOHEMOTH
Come on, you viking bastard!

IVAR
You asked for it.

Ivar and Bohemoth are like two god dueling at Ragnarok, trading blows right in the center of the ring!

“LET'S GO IVAR! LET'S GO IVAR! LET'S GO IVAR!”

The two dangerous superstars continue to unleash bombs against each other, until Ivar snags Bohemoth in a wrist clutch fireman's carry!

RENEE
I think Ivar wants Time Will Destory Everything!

But, Bohemoth manages an escape from the vampire's clutches. When Ivar turns around to get a read on him, that's when Bohemoth throws another stiff lariat!

“OOOOHHHHHHHHHH”

BOHEMOTH
I'M THE MAN! I'M THE MAN! I'M THE MAN!”

“MORE LIKE THE TRANNY! MORE LIKE THE TRANNY! MORE LIKE THE TRANNY!”

COACH
Did Krista come up with that chant?

Chants are replaced by the countdown as the next superstar is no doubt roaring for his release.

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!


SEVEN!


SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!


TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

Ecstasy of Gold carries itself into the arena, and Baron Windells makes a hard charge to the rumble!

RENEE
Baron Windells all fired up and ready to fight!

Windells enters the ring and ducks Bohemoth's famous lariat. The second The Beast turns around he's leveled by a Texas Sized Right Hand that pops the crowd. Windells isn't going to let Bohemoth just lay down and nurse his wounds. Instead he picks him up and starts to move him over the ropes. Rescuing hmself, Bohemoth uses a pair of elbows to shatter Baron's grip. Then he grabs The Gunslinger by his blond locks and tries to pitch him to the outside. But Baron uses a crushing headbutt to send Bo scattering off.

COACH
Good job, concuss yourself before you can get to AngleMania.

In the corner, King Landon is lighting Branningan up with forearm smashes. With TB weakened, the King hooks onto his neck and then leaps onto the top rope to attempt a sliced bread number two! However, Brannigan makes a slick counter by shoving King Landon towards the outside! Only by his royal grace does he land on the apron and not the mats.

KING LANDON
Damnation! Damnation to you, Tony Brannigan, you devil!

COACH
The King knows what's it like to mainevent an AngleMania, he ain't gonna play around and lose so easily.

Baron has Colin set up for his Brigham Young Cocktail DDT. And yet the move never gets pulled off as Colin uses his vamprie strength to muscle Baron all the way to the corner! The second Colin peels off Baron, Tyler comes charging in for a splash. A splash that gets him caught by Baron who proceeds to dump him over the ropes!

RENEE
Tyler Bryant is gone!

Not quite, Renne! Tyler catches onto the middle rope and uses that grip to pull his way back to safety.

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!

RENEE
As we head towards the end of the entrants we're waiting for number twenty five,

SEVEN!


SIX!


FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!


TWO!


ONE!

BBZZZZZZZZZZZT

Cue: Animal By Disturbed

“BBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

TYLER
You guys are all fucked up now!

The boulder of muscles, Flex Phillips, emerges into the arena, pointing and nodding to his boss, Tyler Bryant as he approaches the ring.

RENEE
Its supposed to be every man for himself, but something tells me Flex is a man for Tyler.

COACH
No homo.


Tyler points Flex in the direction of poor Tony Brannigan, who winds up being stomped viciously inb the corner!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

Baron doesn't like to see a legend treated so savagely, and attacks Flex from behind with a clubbing blow. As Windels beats on Flex, Tyler just hangs back and watches the show.

RENEE
Come on, at least help your friend.

COACH
You think if Drake's bodyguard got into a fight Drake is gonna pull out the pistol?

Flex doesn't staty disadvantaged for long, instead grabbing hold of the side of Baron's head and tossing him over the ropes, right onto the mat! Flex may turn his attention back to terrorizing Brannigan, but Bohemoth comes along and punts Baron off the apron!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Baron Windels
ENTERED: 24th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 18th
ELIMINATED BY: Bohemoth
ELIMINATIONS: None
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
That's gotta be upsetting to Baron to get tossed out so soon.

Tyler gives Flex a pat on the back and sends him after Colin, which goes disasterly away as Colin hits him with a  diamond cutter!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
Biotic Crisis!

COLIN
Is there any other goon you have to send against me?

TYLER
:o

TEN!

 

NINE!

 

EIGHT!


SEVEN!

 

SIX!

Tyler is wise to back away from Colin, who is not pleased with having a goon sicked on him.


FIVE!


FOUR!


THREE!

 

TWO!

 

ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

I look and stare so deep in your eyes,
I touch on you more and more every time,
When you leave I'm begging you not to go,
Call your name two or three times in a row,
Such a funny thing for me to try to explain,
How I'm feeling and my pride is the one to blame.
'Cuz I know I don't understand,
Just how your love can do what no one else can.

Everyone else has arrived to the ring with a charge or a confident walk. Not everyone else is the Limitmess Man! He arrives to ring by rappelling from the Angletron, a truly amazing feat that delights the Canadian crowd!

RENEE
Honestly, that's the coolest thing ever!

Simon's mor than just a pretty entrance as after he disembarks he rocks Ivar with a crescent kick!

RENEE
He just kicked The Living Daylights Out of him!

King Landon comes up from behind and bashes Simon in the head with a forearm shot. Simon responds with a powerful knife edge chop that has the King recoiling in agony. Staying on his case, Simon whips him into the ropes and sends him flying over the ropes with a back body drop! But, the King comes down on his feet on the apron and hurries into the ring.

RENEE
There's that rumble experience of King Landon.

Tyler and Oscar are back at again, or more accurately Oscar is back at beating on Tyler. The Gross Pointe native is helpless as Oscar batters him with punches and kicks in the corner.

RENEE
Thanks to that Biotic Crisis I don't think Flex is going to be much help to Tyler against Oscar this time around.

Left to fend for himself, Tyler grabs hold of Oscar's waist and tries to lift him up and over. All this does is make him more vulnerable and Oscar thrills the fans by trapping him into a Crowbar!

“YYYYYEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Tyler screams in raw dispiriting agony, heard even over the roar of the audience. His hand taps the mat over and over again, and his eyes beg for release, but none comes.

COACH
Let him go, Oscar!

RENNE
Actually he doesn't have to, so....

COACH
Ain't you supposed to be the nice one out here?

Though the Biotic Crisis still holds heavy in his well being, Flex stirs himself t deal with Tyler's immense misery. He grabs hold of Oscar pulling him up, yet finds much dismay that Oscar is pulling Tyler up along with him!

COACH
What the hell?

Flex takes an incredible gamble and hurls the bunch of humanity over the ropes, and makes a furious effort to cling onto Tyler. Its Flex's grip versus Oscar's hold, and in the end its the brute power of the bodybuilder that wins out as Oscar goes falling away to the mats!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Oscar Friberg
ENTERED: 20th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 19th
ELIMINATED BY: THE FLEX
ELIMINATIONS: None
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

COACH
Ain't a damn like that ever happened in the Lethal Rumble before.

RENEE
I believe that sort of thing is called cray cray.

TEN!

 

NINE!


EIGHT!


RENEE
Number twenty seven awaits to take on the field!


SEVEN!

 

SIX!

 


FIVE!

 

FOUR!

 


THREE!

 

TWO!

 

ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

There's a room where the light won't find you
Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down
When they do, I'll be right behind you
So glad we've almost made it
So sad we had to fade it
Everybody wants to rule the world
Everybody wants to rule the world
Everybody wants to rule the world


“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

A whisk of the cape, a solemn expression, and a toss back of the head marks the appearance of The Stellar Evolution called Northstar. Letting his cape flutter behind him, the lean and hard grappler travels to the ring.

RENEE
Tony Brannigan in his fifties has been hanging on since number ten, the longest in this match. And Northstar, in his late forties comes in with a very sweet entry number.

Fittingly, Northstar goes right after Tony Brannigan hammering him with chops against the ropes. Soon his King, Landon, comes in and the two men work over Brannigan with chops and forearms. They think they've weakened him enough to dump him over the ropes, but Brannigan begins a fury filled assault with punches. It all concludes when the OAOAST Hall of Famer bangs their heads together!

“BRANNIGAN! BRANNIGAN! BRANNIGAN!”

COACH
What if Brannigan actually wins this thing? Is he going to mainevent AngleMania?!

RENEE
That's the dream that eluded him during his active career, Coach, there's no question he'd take a match with Krista in Philadephia.

In a battle of HGH and roids Bohemoth and THE FLEX are throwing bombs at one another. Neither man is able to gain much of an advantage over the other, and it all becomes a moot point when Ivar slams a rising knee into the side of Bohemoth's face. Staggered against the ropes, Bohemoth seems easy pickings for Ivar's charging lariat. But The Beast lashes out and lacerates the vamprie with a spear!

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

TEN!


NINE!


EIGHT!

COACH
This dude at number twenty eight, whoever he is, got a great chance at winning.


SEVEN!


SIX!

 

FIVE!

 

FOUR!

 

THREE!

 

TWO!

 

ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

I’m gonna lose my faith
I’m gonna burn it out
I’m talking to myself
The walls are coming down

When every breath that I take
Feels like the last and I’m tired
Every time it’s a shot in the dark
And I don’t know why

“BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOO!”

Gory strolls into the view of the audience, and entertains with a bit of MJ inspired dance moves. It does nothing to give him any respect from the fans, and so he just makes his way to the ring.

COACH
There's your boy, Renee!

RENEE
Ugh, no way!

Gory brings his 24/7 title into the ring with him and tries to use to wallop Tony Brannigan! Luckily, Brannigan sees him and ducks the attack. The OAOAST Hall of Famer is overtaken by outraged from Gory's attack and tackles him to the mat, raining down heavy punches!

“YYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

As Gory gets the life beat out of him. Simon and Ivar are trying to dump each other over the ropes. Ivar has the better luck of the two, being a thousand year old vampire, but FLEX comes along and tries to take them both out! But they team up, and beat FLEX back forcing him to retreat.

RENEE
Gee, nice of Tyler to help.

Brannigan has beaten Gory so badly, he deciedes to PIN him for the 24/7 title!


CROWD
ONE!

 

CROWD
TWO!

 


CROWD
THREE!


NO! A kickout!

“THAT WAS THREE! THAT WAS THREE! THAT WAS THREE!”

RENEE
It may not have been three but that was unexpected!

After the chaos of a near title change the countdown begins again....

TEN!

 

NINE!

 

EIGHT

RENEE
We have number twenty nine on tap, the second best draw in the lot.


SEVEN!

 

SIX!

 

FIVE!

 

FOUR!

 

THREE!

 

TWO!

 

ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Cue:: For The Realm

“YYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
The Bustle Junior Heavyweight Champion arrives to Toronto!

Silver hair flowing behind him, Eggther carries his lean body to the ring. He slides in, having to avoid his rival Bohemoth, then comes off the ropes to blast him with a running superkick!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
Bride Price!

Bohemoth sags against the ropes, clearly out of it, and Eggther sees his chance to eliminate him from the match. He leans against, trying his hardest to push the heavier man over the ropes.

“EGGTHER! EGGTHER! EGGTHER” the fans sing.

Colin decides to lend a hand, more to himself, as he leans into Eggther, pushing him against Bohemoth, and eventually serving to take them both out of the match!

“OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Bohemoth
ENTERED: 23rd
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 20th
ELIMINATED BY: Colin Maguire JR
ELIMINATIONS: Baron Windells
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Eggther
ENTERED: 29th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 21st
ELIMINATED BY: Colin Maguire JR
ELIMINATIONS: None
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

COACH
Dayum~! Two big names gone just like that!

RENEE
With Colin leading big time in eliminations.

Simon shoots Northstar into the ropes, and lowers his head to try a back body drop. Yet The Stellar Evolution grabs hold of his head and tries to launch him over the ropes instead! To prevent this, Simon cracks him with a series of elbows, but then Northstar surprises him with a release rock bottom!

RENEE
Maria!

Northstar may think he's experienced a high, but it quickly turns to a low as Ivar slams a lariat into his back and flings him over the ropes!

“YYYYYYEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Northstar
ENTERED: 27th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 22nd
ELIMINATED BY: Ivar The Cunning
ELIMINATIONS: None
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


TEN!

 

NINE!

 

EIGHT!

RENEE
Finally number thirty!


SEVEN!

 

SIX!

 

FIVE!


FOUR!

 

THREE!

 

TWO!


ONE!


BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Sun's always falling
Weightless and free
Now when you close your eyes

Just breathe, breathe with me

 

“YYYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
Its Theodore Buckworth!

Clad in his red trunks, and an expression that radiates boldness, Teddy Buckworth surges to the ring!

COACH
Buckworth's won before, and he's looking good to repeat now.

Buckworth slides into the ring and is immediate pounced on by THE FLEX! The huge grappler pulls him up and hammers him with blows that may hurt but don't stifle Bugatti Buckworth. The former world heavyweight champion slams his full body weight into The Flex and manages to knock him over the ropes and onto the ring apron!

TYLER
Shit!

Simon sees a chance to score a big elimination on The Flex and makes a mad charge to him. The problem is THE FLEX grabs hold of the side of his head and hurls him out of the ring!

“BBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

TYLER
There we go!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Simon Singleton
ENTERED: 26th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 23rd
ELIMINATED BY: THE FLEX
ELIMINATIONS: None
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Meanwhile, Brannigan is fending off King Landon's chops. The Texas native shows he's still in this as he grabs hold of King Landon and attempts to give him an Alabama Slam right out of the ring!

RENEE
Look out! Look out!

Landon fights desperately to be out of the attack and manages to worm his way down Brannigan's body. Now with an advantage, he begins smashing forearms into his foe, weakening him and sagging him against the ropes. However, Brannigan is able to fend him off with a well placed boot to the knee. But, he soon encounters a charging Gory Dragan! So Brannigan lowers the ropes and causes Gory to spill out the ring!

“YYYYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Gory Dragan
ENTERED: 28th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 24th
ELIMINATED BY: Tony Brannigan
ELIMINATIONS: None
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“TONY THE BODY! TONY THE BODY! TONY THE BODY!”

RENEE
Amazing! Listen to the chant for Tony Brannigan, who's been in it since number ten.

Brannigan takes a moment to soak in the adulation of the fans, which is the exact wrong thing to do as Tyler bundles him over the ropes!


But wait! Brannigan lands on the ring apron!


“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

Deciding to deal with Brannigan another time, Tyler goes off in search of easier prey. Unfortunately he walks into a Diamond Cutter attempt by Ivar! Somehow he's able to shove him off, putting Ivar in the path of King Landon who uses a spinning head scissors to stun the world and throw him out of the match!

“BBBBBBOOOOOOOOO!”

 
~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Ivar The Cunning
ENTERED: 18th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 25th
ELIMINATED BY: King Landon
ELIMINATIONS: Northstar, Deuce Deuce Bigelow
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TYLER
All you, all you, King Landon.

COACH
The Good Guys are back!

RENNE
I dunno about that.

Brannigan is being choked in the corner by THE FLEX, and probably would be passing out if it weren't for a chop block from his cousin, Teddy. Suffering, Brannigan is in no shape to help and thus Buckworth is left to deal with FLEX by himself.

COACH
Better haul ass outta there!

Teddy does no such thing and leaps onto THE FLEX's back to seek out a sleeper hold. This worries Tyler, who flies off the top to try and hit Teddy with a single leg dropkick. But, Buckworth makes the wise move to release the hold and drops down to duck the attack. THE FLEX's attention instantly goes to Tyler's wounds, which means its off Buckworth. As such it comes as great surprise to him when Buggati B dropkicks him ouf of the match!

“YYYYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  THE FLEX
ENTERED: 25th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 25th
ELIMINATED BY: Teddy Buckworth
ELIMINATIONS: Oscar Friberg, Simon Singleton
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TYLER
NO! NO! NO!

RENEE
Only five guys left and one of them is Tony Brannigan, senior citizen and longest entrant!

Tyler is frenzied over Flex's elimination and takes the run at Buckworth with a Yakuza Kick! But the attack misses and hits an unprepared Tony Brannigan flush in the face. It almost happens in slow motion, the way Brannigan is upended, slams into the ropes, and takes an agonizing tumble to the outside.

CROWD
:o

RENEE

OH NO!
~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Tony Brannigan
ENTERED: 10th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 26th
ELIMINATED BY: Tyler Bryant
ELIMINATIONS: Big Papa Thrust, Outlaw Cello and Gory Dragan
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


~~~~~~~~~~~
FINAL FOUR: King Landon, Tyler Bryant, Colin Maguire Jr, Teddy Buckworth
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Brannigan sits on the outside, eliminated, and in a time when most superstars take the sad shuffle to the back.

Instead Tony The Body stands listening. Listening to the song of 18,000 thousand maniacs.

“TONY THE BODY! TONY THE BODY TONY THE BODY!”

This outpouring of love and devotion from fans who have followed his historic life, brings tears to the eyes of one of the toughest men in the business. With raised fist in salute, Tony Brannigan makes his own suffle backstage, one that's accompanied by the respect and love of an entire Galaxy.

COACH
Mad props to Tony The Body for putting in work!

RENEE
He went from number ten and eliminated three superstars and was so close. He has nothing to be ashamed of. Not a thing.

In the ring, Colin and Teddy Buckworth stand an imposing force against an intimidating grouping of King Landon Maddix and Tyler Bryant.

TYLER
Still The Good Guys, right, King Landon?

KING LANDON
Yes, yes, still The Good Guys. Yes!

COLIN
You be The Good Guys.

BUCKWORTH
We shall be The Enterprise.

Alliance are set for the nonce and war explodes with AngleMania being the ultimate prize. Buckworth overhwelms Tyler with body blows, as King Landon and Colin sling forearms as if they were firing RPGs!

RENEE
You couldn't ask for a bigger final four!

COACH
No question. My money is on Star67. Let's get it!

Colin and Buckworth work in sync together and hurl the heels at one another, creating a devastating collision! King Landon crumples to the mat, but Tyler stays upright, woozy from the attack. Bugatti B looks to send him over the ropes, but when he tosses him Tyler lands on the ring apron. Hurried, the US Champ smashes a shoulder block into Buckworth's stomach, then sling shots himself back into the ring Unfortunately he runs right into an Irish Uppercut from Colin!

RENEE
Ouch! Nobody throws one of those like Colin.

Back in the mix is King Landon who grabs hold of Colin and throws him shoulder first into ring posts. Colin staggers out, leading King Landon to crack him with an enziguri that fells him. Then its Tyler's turn and the Gross Pointe native hits the vampire with a springboard leg drop.

KING LANDON
Let's be rid of this damn swine!

TYLER
No problem.

King Landon and Tyler join together in pulling Colin upright. However, Colin gets help from Buckworth who peels King Landon away from him. The Miami Beach native smashes Landon with closed fists, then brings him onto his shoulders near the ropes.

COACH
Get down your highness! But not down on the mats!

King Landon kicks and kicks and kicks some more and finally frees himself from Buckworth's grip. Now behind Buckworth, King Landon takes a risky move and leaps over the ropes with Buckworth's head in his grip.  Buckworth's neck snaps off the ropes, while Landon lands in a precarious spot on the apron. Still, he has enough room and position to haul Buckworth over the ropes and to the ring apron with him.

RENEE
Very dangerous territory for both these superstars!

Buckworth overpowers King Landon and again snatches him onto his shoulders!

COACH
This might really be the end for his grace!

Again King Landon is has to swim his way to freedom, using leg strength to push himself out of Buckworth's hold. With no cheap tricks on his side, King Landon still has to face a fully powered Buckworth. That is until Tyler comes in and slams his knee into Buckworth's back to knock him out the match!

“BBBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Teddy Buckworth
ENTERED: 30th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 27th
ELIMINATED BY: Tyler Bryant
ELIMINATIONS: THE FLEX
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
Teddy is gone!

COACH
Some revenge for The Flex.

RENEE
I doubt Tyler is thinking of anyone but himself.

KING LANDON
The Good Guys rule once more! Kneel before us and beg for our kindness!

“FUCK YOU BOTH! FUCK YOU BOTH! FUCK YOU BOTH!”

Colin gives an excellent fuck you as he storms through both King Landon and Tyler with a double lariat. Snarling his rage, he picks Tyler off the mat, and uses a mighty heave to send him over the ropes! The audience readies to rejoice at Tyler's defeat, but the US champion comes down on the ring apron to avoid diaster.

RENEE
Man, Tyler's pretty good at staring down certain doom.

Aiding his former stable mate is King Landon, who clobbers Colin in the back of the head with a forearm. As he mutter curses, he pushes Colin into the corner and proceeds to rifle knife edge chops into his chest.

KING LANDON
I am royalty! You are an abomination! I am royalty! You are an abomination! No match for me! None!

COLIN
I would rethink that point were I you.

Balling up his fists, Colin begins to bounce punches off King Landon's handsome face. Soon enough punches land to drop the Madrid born superstar on his back and leave him begging off.

RENEE
So much for King Landon's boasting.

Tyler comes roaring off the ropes with a lariat, yet Colin sees him just in time to drop toe hold him and land his head directly onto King Landon's crown jewels

“OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!”

COACH
Awww shit!

Both King and prince roll away with Colin giving chase to the US champion. More out of desperation than anything else, Tyler grabs hold of Colin's green and yellow tights and pulls him into the ropes, to drive his neck onto the cables. Still spurred by worry and fear, Star67 hauls his foe onto his shoulders

RENEE
Setting up 0 to 100!

But Colin manages an effortless escape from Tyler's clutches, to infuriate the pretty boy. Much worse than the escape is the T-bone suplex Colin throws him down with!

“YYYYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

RENEE
HavrdPlex from the Harvard graduate!

Tyler rolls away, howling in agony, leaving King Landon to fight this battle alone. The King comes in with a series of leg kicks that would have a non vampire hobbling. As Colin is a vampire, he merely catches hold of King Landon's attacking leg on the fifth kick.

KING LANDON
You unhand me, damn it! I said unhand me!

COLIN
Who am I to deny the request of royalty?

Using King Landon's leg for a single grip, Colin presses the former SWF boss into the air and puts him through horrifying descent to the outside!

“YYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAAAA!”

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  King Landon Maddix
ENTERED: 21st
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 28th
ELIMINATED BY: Tyler Bryant
ELIMINATIONS: Ivar The Cunning
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RENEE
The King has fallen!

There's no mourning to fill Tyler's moments, with Landon gone its but one obstacle removed. So its with great speed, Tyler is upon Colin and trying to lift him over the ropes. Speed and failure, however, as Colin shrugs him aside.

RENEE
Tyler is facing down an incredibly imposing force right now.

COACH
It might as well be AngleMania right now for him.

Striding back to Colin just gets Tyler Irish Uppercutted and left with a cut across his chest, a cut he reacts with shock and horror at.

COACH
Now the boy is getting tore up!

RENEE
If he's going to AngleMania he has to earn it.

Colin etches a scowl across his face and stalks Tyler's retreat the way he might stalk prey in the night. When he closes in on Tyler he unleashes a lariat that bulldozes Tyler into the ropes but not over them. With Tyler sagging and bleeding from his chest, Colin flashes his fangs for an easy snack.

COACH
Yo, he's gonna bite the dude!

And bite the dude Colin does, his fangs diving downwards and embedding themselves into Tyler's chest!

“OOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!”

The youngster is bent over the ropes, a prone meal for a starving vampire. Shrieks of misery and fear rip out of Tyler's mouth, but Colin still sees fit to drink from him. Working with mind clouded with panic, Tyler kicks his legs up and starts to carry himself over the ropes. Unprepared for this tactic, Colin flows with him, and they make a twisting river of flesh, that empties Colin onto the ring mats!

“BBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

RENEE
Tyler Bryant wins! Oh my god, Tyler Bryant has won the Lethal Rumble!

~~~~~~~~~~~
ELIMINATED:  Colin Maguire Jr
ENTERED: 11th
ELIMINATION NUMBER: 29th
ELIMINATED BY: Tyler Bryant
ELIMINATIONS: Coco Chanel, Daisuke Motozaki, Ned Blanchard, Bohemoth, Eggther, King Landon
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


~~~~~~~~~~~
WINNER IS YOU!
TYLER BRYANT
ENTERED: 15th
ELIMINATIONS: Tony Brannigan, TurboWolf, Al Houd, Teddy Buckworth, Colin Maguire Jr
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BUFFER
Your winner of the 2016 Lethal Rumble...TYLER BRYANT!

Fireworks explode through the sky, a marker of the incredible victory that has been witnessed tonight. Except the witnesses find nothing incredible about it, rather they greet the celebration with vocal disdain.

COACH
Tyler Bryant came in at number fifteen, after wrestling earlier tonight, took out five dudes and survived getting eaten by a vampire!

Lorelei and THE FLEX have arrived in the ring to heap praise and love upon their hero. But with a bleeding wound, Tyler finds his moment muted with only the faintest of smiles. Still its smile enough, as Tyler knows what he has achieved.

RENEE
The United States Champion is en route to AngleMania to face Krista Isadora Duncan for her world title! Good night everyone!

FADE OUT

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