Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 Too sick to even write an intro. BRANNIGAN Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the interview stage...ST ARCHIE'S SCHOOL FOR BAD GIRLS! “Far To Young to Die” blasts along and with it comes our mischievous tag team champions and their hapless caretaker. AISLING (in queen voice) There you are, sire, the ruggedly handsome prince I have been seeking all my life. I shalt be yours for ever! BRANNIGAN Really? I guess I can leave my wife. I put in my years with her. AISLING (in teenage voice) Oh, you thought I was serious. My bad. I wasn't. BRANNIGAN ARCHIE Forgive her, Mister Brannigan, manners have been a hard lesson to learn for these two. SABRINA I learned how to trick Tony Tourettes into downloading viruses onto his crappy laptop. Tell him a virus infected site has BangBro passwords! Hahhaahah! ARCHIE Do you see what I mean? BRANNIGAN Exactly. You two have a big title defense against the newly christened Bohemoth.com with the so called Man in their corner. BOHEMOTH (OS) Correct yourself! “BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Everyone looks up to see THE MAN Bohemoth on the video screen wearing pimp worthy sun glasses. BOHEMOTH Correct yourself, old man. BRANNIGAN Old man? SABRINA Old fat man! Old balding man! Old impot- ARCHIE That's enough. BOHEMOTH There's no so called man. I am THE MAN! And I lead THE WOMEN. Bohemoth.com. You think two punk kids can beat my handpicked babes? AISLING (in teenage voice) I'm actually around 500 years old, and they're only nineteen which is like two years older than Sabrina. SABRINA I'm legal in Vegas! BOHEMOTH Shut up! All of you shut up. I'm a nice guy sometimes, and now is one of those times. I'm gonna give you some advice. Study some tapes, hit the gym, learn some new moves, and say a prayer to god, because you'll need all the divine help you can get against Bohemoth.com With that said, Bohemoth's image disappears from the screen. SABRINA Whatever! New name same Losers.com “YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” The champ's entrance music plays and the lovely teens pose with their titles. Archie on the other hand looks a bit more concerned about Bohmeoth.com's threat. RENEE Those were strong words spoken by both parties. Only the match at School's Out can settle it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 OAOAST cameras captured Tanner Neptune warming up in the Team SCREAM dressing room surrounded by his fellow members, including OAOAST U.S. Champion Blaine and his sister Sammi. TANNER Big match tonight, guys. This could put me on the map. BLAINE Or in the hospital. TANNER SAMMI But more than likely on the map because I believe in you Tanner. TANNER Thanks. Say, do you wanna be in my corner? I mean, if it’s OK with you Blaine. Sammi and Blaine shoot each other a look. BLAINE I don’t think that’s a really good idea. Alexander’s kinda a madman right now. I know he wants a piece of me too. For all we know he’d go after Sammi to strike at me. OSCAR Alexander’s not that type of guy, but I agree, he’s a bit on edge right now. No reason to rile him up further. TANNER Geez, now I’m getting a little concerned being in the same ring with him! SAMMI Heroes don’t fear anything. And you were my hero at AngleMania saving Blaine from that brute. TANNER Yeah. I was, wasn’t I? All right. Let’s do this! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 Inside the throne room, Lord Northstar stands watch well off in a corner. He's not well hidden enough to escape the approach of AC The Exile though. SER ALEARYS Awww lucky you a match with the golden girl, Krista Isadora Duncan. If it only were me with that chance, I like to torture pretty things. Actually I like to torture all things. Northstar rounds on AC, but his look is imperceptible. And that's all the worse for AC. LORD NORTHSTAR Look around. Looking around, Ser Alearys only sees the throne room with its armed guards. LORD NORTHSTAR What do you see? SER ALEARYS Men at arms? Uh a carpet? LORD NORTHSTAR Is that all? SER ALEARYS Yes. I guess so. LORD NORTHSTAR More the fool you. Look harder. You see a single room, which is afforded to King Landon Maddix. SER ALEARYS Its the throne room. LORD NORTHSTAR Its a room inside Krista Isadora Duncan's house. If you step outside you will step into her hallway. You will find other rooms within her house. People may reside in those rooms. However they are still within Krista Isadora Duncan's house. I do not intend on doing something as vulgar as torture. Ser Alearys shrugs his shoulders, wondering what his ally could possibly be aiming at. LORD NORTHSTAR I will claim this house in the name of our king. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 *** Oscar Friberg vs. Doc White *** Both men shook hands at the start in a sign of sportsmanship. Doc put on another fine showing, but disaster struck once again attempting a high-risk move, as has been the cases in almost all his previous matches. In this case it was a flying cross body off the top that Oscar side-stepped and immediately followed with his Early Bird Gets The Worm finisher (Ranhei/SOS ) for the 1-2-3. Although Doc did pull off his rolling cradle abdominal stretch pin (The Doc’s Alive) for a near fall to a big pop.Winner: Oscar Friberg, via pinfall. After the match the two shook hands once again and Oscar raised Doc’s hand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 Sophie is going over some contracts and such when King Landon Maddix bursts through the door, trailed by Ser Timothy Cash. SOPHIE Bonjour, Monsieur Maddix. Ca va? KING LANDON You always looked down on me, that's it, that's the truth. Isn't it Ser Timothy. SER TIMOTHY It is your perception, your grace. KING LANDON No, fool! Foolish man don't you know its reality. You planted seeds of dissent in Esther's head! You, Sophie! SOPHIE I 'av not. You 'av taken her for granted, monsieur. Zhat is your fault, non? KING LANDON Non! A king is absolute! His rule that is. His mind too. Yes, yes. But when am I getting my world title back? Alix has it. She hurt Ser Felx. She has my title, I wanted it back for so long. Yes, yes, tell me that. SOPHIE Next week we 'av zhe tourney for number one contendership. Tellement amusant! King Landon can't believe what he just heard and freezes. SER TIMOHTY Your grace? KING LANDON No! No! Tournament? I think not. No! What do I get for being cheated out of my title and my queen? Cheated! Cheated! You are a monster,a terrible president, you have always hated me. A tournament! Insanity! But, you will pay for this. I will have my revenge! King Landon goes as far as to shake his fist at Sophie before he storms out with Ser Timothy dutifully behind him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 Fashionably late is Ivar The Cunning who strides into the arena in a cool leather jacket and jeans. He's almost immediately approached by Spencer Reiger IVAR Spencer. You want something from me. SPENCER What are we going to do about Colin? He needs our help. IVAR You are extremely annoying. But loyal. If you'll stand with me, we will fight Mister Maguire SR and our erstwhile companions Celtic Gothic at School's Out. SPENCER Of course I'll fight with you. But we're gonna need more than you and me. IVAR Surprisingly, I agree. I have few friends, though. This is were your stupid affability and annoying chumminess comes in handy. Convince Teddy and Simon to fight with us again. Or easier than that convince Gedrun to convince them. Spencer and Ivar give each other nods and go off to the battle plans. SPENCER Wait, he called me stupid and annoying. n an interview conducted by OAOAST Hall of Famer Terry Taylor, Deuce Deuce Bigelow cut a promo on his School’s Out opponent Daisuke Motozaki . He mocked a grown man’s love of ponies and for being a leader of freaks everywhere, but that come SO he’s gonna remind Dice-M about his place in the OAOAST: the kiddie table! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 Backstage, VICE and Joey The Rat were interviewed live on the AngleTron by Renee at Sofa Central. Their stunt last week was brought up and how it backfired. Joey complained about his guys being booked in a #1 contenders tag against the CAE at School’s Out when they’re the rightful top contenders. BOSLEY All anybody’s talkin’ about nowadays is justice. Well where’s the justice for VICE? We got bent over in the Anderson Cup Finals! CPA How quickly they forget. *puffs cigar* BOSLEY You can say that again. CPA How quickly they forget. *puffs cigar* BOSLEY So true it had to be said twice! But nobody talks about Hood Again interfering on the CAE’s behalf because they wanted no part of us. CPA We’re the big dawgs. BOSLEY And they wanted to play with puppies because they ain’t got no bite. CPA Like getting a blowjob from a hooker with no teeth. Goddamn! OAOAST tag champs Hood Again and their uncle/manager Marcellus appeared amongst the crowd carrying their own MICROPHONE and SPEAKERS! Marcellus cut a promo on VICE and hyped the #1 contenders tag at SO, although he said there won’t be any winners because whoever walks out the #1 contenders will get their ass kick. As if things couldn’t get any more bizarre, the MARDI GRAS HELLFIRE CLUB hit the ring and began throwing BEADS in Hood Again’s direction symbolic of wanting a tag title shot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 Remember a few weeks back when Logan Mann claimed Mr. Dick made repeated sexual advances towards Holly during the Real American Prick’s Everlasting Gobthrobbers days with Big Papa Thrust and that was the cause for his attack at AngleMania XIV? MD set the record straight calling it total BS in an IN-RING interview with OAOAST correspondent Sara Jean Underwood. MD revealed Logan enjoys watching Holly with other men/women and that during his OAOAST sabbatical he’d often join the ELGT on trips to watch them bang the guys. But MD had no interest in Holly. Why? MISTER DICK Not my type. And that’s me not being a dick. SARA JEAN MD hyped the 6-Pack Challenge for the United States Championship at School’s Out, the perfect opportunity to get his hands on rivals Logan and BPT in one night. “Plus I even get a chance to take home some gold.” Suddenly BIG PAPA THRUST and THE FREAKAZOIDS appeared on the AngleTron. Oohlala wore a trench coat for a reason that became clear in minutes. But first BPT took time to lay the verbal smack down on MD and his other competitors in the 6-Pack Challenge at SO. BIG PAPA THRUST Not only will I beat each and every one of your asses to become the new United States Champion and thrust myself into the position of #1 contender to the World Title, but I’ll go back to the hotel, throw Oohlala on the bed and dick her like a real man. MISTER DICK Into preggos now, huh? BPT snaps his fingers and Oohlala removes her trench coat to reveal a BIKINI underneath. No hint of a baby bump at all. BIG PAPA THRUST Killer bod isn’t it?* BZZZZZZT *OMG~! The hidden camera returns to show BPT and Oohlala (wearing a tracksuit) going inside PLANNED PARENTHOOD. Moments later they emerge happy as can be with Oohlala now sporting a tight sexy dress. * BZZZZZZT *OMG~! MISTER DICK, RENEE & COACH, THE OAOAST GALAXY OOHLALA You don’t have to worry about the daddy thing anymore, Dicky. It’s all been taken care of. BIG PAPA THRUST POP goes the little bastard!! The AngleTron goes back as a stunned Sara Jean is left in the ring with an angry and distraught MD. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 Backstage we find Remy Bazil working on a new con card trick, while he fails to notice 24/7 Champion Badass Jack standing behind him. BADASS JACK Cajun. REMY Remy is so shocked he tosses his cards into the air! Jack doesn't even blink. BADASS JACK Felt we oughta remake accquientances. REMY Nnn...now? Mon ami, is it not so...isolated, and dark here? BADASS JACK My kind of spot. Just me and you, bub, two men. Two friends. REMY Hheheh, yeah.... BADASS JACK You seem a little nervous, bub. REMY Nervous? Me? Non! BADASS JACK You're shaking and your sweating. Looks nervous to me. Here hold this, it'll make you feel better. Badass Jack forces the 24/7 title on Remy. REMY Mon ami, what is this? More shock and fright comes for Remy when Jack turns his back on him! BADASS JACK You got something you wanna say, or better yet do to me, this is your one and only chance. Although he may be dumb, Remy isn't that dumb and loads up for a ::beltshot:: BADASS JACK But after your done doing what you need to do, I will skin you alive with my bare hands. CLANK! That's the sound of the belt dropping, and we hear further sounds of Remy hauling ass away from Jack. BADASS JACK He always was a stupid bastard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 11, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 *** Alexander The Brutal vs. Tanner Neptune *** Given everything that’s occurred between the two in recent weeks, it was only a matter of time before they met 1 on 1. And despite jumping on Alexander early, Tanner couldn’t fend off the strength of the Modern Day Gladiator and eventually tapped out to the Crossface.Winner: Alexander The Brutal, via pinfall. But Alexander refused to break the hold following the match. All the tapping in the world wasn’t enough to make ATB break, but a surprise appearance from Oscar Friberg did. It took a few moments but he ultimately got Alexander to break the hold. ATB stared him down afterward. FADE OUT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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