Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 OVER 200 COUNTRIES IN 10 DIFFERENT LANGUAGES- -TO MORE THEN TEN MILLION VIEWERS EACH WEEK- -THE OAOAST THE WORLD WIDE LEADER IN PARODY ENTERTAINMENT-BROADCAST IN OAOAST 3D https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZVoq2SZfu0 RENEE Here we are with OAOAST HeldDOWN~! Its Renee Young, moi! And Da Coach, and what a mainevent we have tonight! TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT FIRE & ICE VS PRETTY YOUNG MONEY Baby listen I'm not on DRUGS, I'm not on DRUGS I'm just in LOVE Oooh, baby don't you see I'm not on DRUGS, I'm not on DRUGS I'm just in LOVE You high enough for me The fans let loose huge loving cheers as the arm linked Alix Maria Spezia and Queen Esther skip onto the entrance stage. RENEE Our world champion stole King Landon's throne and I take it she's hear to give him his new one. ALIX Yo! Yo! Ya'll see that sweet boy in the front row near the camera man? Everyone looks at a pauncy middle aged man in the front row. ALIX He molested no less than four fucking foster kids! Booo this man! MAN “BBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” QUEEN ESTHER Alix, dear, you misread my message. He adopted four foster kids out of the goodness of his heart. ALIX Oh snap. My bad. You know adopt, molest, they both have....letters? QUEEN ESTHER A mistake we all make with the two words. ALIX Really? QUEEN ESTHER No, sadly not. But lets be in high spirits as we present Landon with his new throne! ALIX Oh yeah, of course. I did promise that, and I'm not like some people's dads who promise oh yeah I'll take you to the Dodgers' game and leave you waiting on the front porch listening to your mom getting eaten out by former WWE star Essa Rios. I deliver results! I do deliver results, right? I mean I didn't trade the throne for weed or anything, right? QUEEN ESTHER You attempted to, but were shot at and chased off. Sometimes valor looks an awful lot like cowardice, the castle steward used to say that before my dad castrated him. ALIX Bring me the throne! We get ceremonious rollicking music and Alix hops back and forth in excitement. All this for a toilet. A pink toilet. A pink toilet missing a flusher. A pink toilet with Ben10 stickers. A pink toilet with no flusher but a condom dispenser? ALIX Yes! Here it is! Your brand new throne King Landon. I beat up five six graders for those stickers, and also a carton of Strawberry milk. Yum yum for the tum-tum. I think Mariachi stole the flusher, ah us crazy Mexicans. QUEEN ESTHER I chose the color! ALIX Right-o! And what else? Oh yeah the condom dispenser. Krista paid for that so when you bang a tavern wench “you'll never spread your retard seed.” Her words. Not mine. No hate, just love. Is there love? Not if SER FELX's arrival has anything to do with it! He attacks Alix from behind! RENEE King Landon sent out Ser Felx! That was the wrong guy to send, as Alix recovers and overpowers him. RENEE This isn't Floyd/Pacman, more like Floyd/little kid. Alix stashes Flex's head within the toilet, and begins banging the lid down on his head! Once done with that, she kicks the toilet and sends it and Ser Felix falling off the entrance stage! CRRRAASSSSH! CROWD RENEE That's not the first time someone's been pushed off the stage in the OAOAST, but its the first time someone was in a toilet! ALIX Shiiiiit. Can we give him like a coupon to Olive Garden? QUEEN ESTHER I will send the hounds to retrieve it at once. ALIX Maybe sending humans would be better, just a thought. COACH Alix has done nothing but torture the King. That's what COD does, but you can't torture royalty. Alix is digging herself a hole. UP NEXT! UNITED STATES TITLE: OSCAR FRIBERG VS BLAINE CAYLEY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 *** U.S. Title: Blaine Cayley © w/ Samantha Cayley vs. Oscar Friberg w/ Tanner Neptune *** Having lost his championship in the Double Jeopardy match at AngleMania XIV, the former champion Oscar looked to regain the title he never was pinned for. But it was not meant to be… and none of the reasons had anything to do with the match. In fact, the match never even takes place! First we had to thank ALEXANDER THE BRUTAL for jumping into the ring following the intros and giving Blaine a choke slam! SAMMI RENEE The Sword of Damocles! Tanner jumped in and received one for his troubles. RENEE And a second one! COACH Obviously Alexander hasn’t forgotten how Blaine won the title at AngleMania, or Tanner’s role in it. Shocked, Oscar shoots Alexander a look that says “WTF, man?” ALEXANDER You tolerate it. As far as I’m concerned, you’re just as responsible as them. Shades of grey, daddy! Anyway, as Alexander takes a step towards Oscar… BIG PAPA THRUST brushes him aside and begins attacking Blaine! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH What the heck? RENEE This must be what Big Papa Thrust meant by going after “the next best thing” last week. If a World title shot wasn’t in the cards, why not go after the title that gets you one step closer? On the verge of blows one second, Alexander and Oscar join forces to rid the ring of BPT. “YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" BPT retreats up the ramp only to be jumped by MR. DICK! “YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" OAOAST officials quickly rush to restore order. COACH And you thought it was bad in Baltimore! RENEE * COMMERCIAL * OAOAST correspondent Sara Jean Underwood conducted an interview with Logan Mann (w/ Holly) regarding the challenge issued to him by Mr. Dick for School’s Out. Logan was like fuck that because he’s still pissed over getting attacked by MD last week. SARA JEAN Turnabout is fair play as they say. LOGAN Hey, I’m just a caring husband standing up for his woman. HOLLY Yeah, [bleep]. Suddenly YELLING was heard as the men involved in the previous segment’s wild affair were ushered backstage by OAOAST officials. OAOAST boss lady SOPHIE then appeared and scolded the parties involved for ruining a marquee bout. SOPHIE I will not be embarrassed in my home country! Those words led to Sophie booking a 6-man tag featuring Mr. Dick, Oscar and Blaine vs. BPT, Logan and Alexander! SAMMI BLAINE You can’t do that! I just got my bell rung. SOPHIE I am zee boss. I can do as I please! Sammi then gives Tanner that puppy dog face which melts his heart/cock. TANNER (clutching back of neck from Alexander’s choke slam) Uh, Sophie, Blaine’s right. It wouldn’t be fair to him as U.S. champ to be put in a match after being spiked in the mat. I’ll take his spot. OSCAR SOPHIE You’d do that? Tanner looks at Sammi even though he’s still in pain himself. TANNER Yep. SAMMI RENEE COACH That boy is thinking with the wrong head! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 Inside the interview lounge we find... SARA JEAN UNDERWOOD with.... LILLY FLORENT and CADY OF GRIMM SARA JEAN Hey, everybody, Sara Jean here with AllXFL.com who from what I hear have a big announcement. LILLY A real interviewer. Oh, cool. Wow. SARA JEAN Nice to be appreciated. CADY FWWWWHHAAAAAAAHH! SARA JEAN CADY Do you not know the indomitable spirits have rendered the reality you know into halves! Halves beyond what you couldn't otherwise ever have seen. What was once one is now two! SARA JEAN Ooookay. What's that mean for us? CADY It means we have two announcements obviously. SARA JEAN Obviously, she says! LILLY Oh cool. I get to go first looks like. We're the number one contenders for the women's tag titles, yeah. Ummm lets see, we'll take the title shot at School's Out if that's cool. Maybe even if it isn't. Heheh, just kidding, we're good girls. SARA JEAN And your giving us a second announcement! That's what's really crazy. CADY FWAAHAHHAHAHA! Who told you all things come in simple terms! Label us the AllXFL.com but know that in other dimensions our names are the names of conquerors and dictators. We are invincible! FWHHHAHAAHAHHA! SARA JEAN Lilly help? LILLY Me? Cool. No, but, Cady wanted to announce this. CADY This world has seen change beyond it all and now the change hits the exploding outrealm were we reside. AllXFL.com is dead and buried, the monster of the deepest reaches of the abyss has spoken to us and we have heeded his words. We are now.... BOHEMOTH walks onto the scene and puts his arms around the girls! BOHEMOTH Bohemoth.com SARA JEAN But, Xavier? BOHEMOTH Yo, Xavier, deal with it, pop warner, your girls are playing in the big leagues now. All XFL Network is next, and soon all you'll have left are your participation trophies. Punk. *** "The King of Bronies" Daisuke Motozaki vs. Sonic w/ C.A.M. *** Weeks before he’s scheduled to face Deuce Deuce Bigelow at School’s Out, the King of Bronies met the big man’s Slaughterhouse stable mate Sonic. Both shined offensively, but Dice-M’s fighting spirit was simply too much for Sonic who went down courtesy of the Rainbow Dash Mash (shining wizard).Winner: Daisuke Motozaki, via pinfall. SCHOOL'S OUT LIVE FROM PARIS, FRANCE! MAY 31st! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 ***Juicy Cantu-Si and Gretchen Wright W/El Hijo del Sheep Vs Silver and Pierette Saint-Nerdregard*** COACH These idiots in the 3 Amigos fucked with the wrong ones. Juicy is barely out of the OAOVW and now he gotta face down a former world champion and former AngleMania mainevent. RENEE And a guy with a few screws lose! Juicy is carefree as he waves the plastic pal in front of Gretchen. Not smart. GRETCHEN Gah! What manner of perversion do you think you are perpetrating? JUICY Its El Hijo del Sheep. See? GRETCHEN Codswallop! JUICY Try him out. GRETCHEN Yes, good, please do allow me to “try him out.” Juicy handed Gretchen the sheep....and watched her punt the sheep all the way to the entrance ramp! CROWD and JUICY RENEE A future CFL kicker is born! GRETCHEN A grown man gallivanting with a cheap piece of lawn decoration. Even for a baseborn that is...that is...UNACCEPTABLE! Stand aside, I will handle our adversaries, but do not deign to make eye contact with me. That sort of thing isn't done. RENEE If there was ever any doubt that's Christian's sister it should be gone now. Pierette was in a good mood. Or in a manic mood. Either way she started by cartwheeling around Gretchen. At that point Gretchen was ready to quit, but she managed to get Pierette to lockup with her. The gals went from corner to corner and were eventually forced to break after a stalemate. PIERETTE I made a friend! GRETCHEN A friend? You? Tosh-bosh, you aren't fit to sweep the sludge out the gutters of my family's winter cottage, and eat it for supper with a side of raw sewage and beans. JUICY Beans....that's a normal- GRETCHEN Do not question me, cur! Sheep fornicator! JUICY Silver and Juicy stepped in with Silver often looking for his ankle lock that his uncle taught him. But, Juicy kept avoiding the attack and finally managed to hit his signature armlock scoop slam and then a standing moonsault for a two count. RENEE Silver was trained by his uncle AngleSault and that's a major x factor in his favor. Juicy and Silver traded high flying attacks. When Juicy went off the top, Silver caught him with his trademark super fast spinning heel kick for a two count. He then tagged in Pierette, which bought in Gretchen! PIERETTE Ho-ho-ho, I got to touch the skin of a teenage beauty! GRETCHEN Keep your filthy mitts to yourself unless you want them tossed on a pike! PIRETTE My kind of a girl! Pierette ran towards Gretchen only to get hit with a step up DDT! RENEE That's called Blue Blood Letting! PIERETTE That was awesome! Your the best! I'd pee myself if we weren't friends! GRETCHEN Friends? Smile, be polite and have faith Gretchen Pierette and Gretchen fought hard with several reversals between them. Eventually, Silver made a blind tag on Pirette and dragged Juicy into the ring. Cantu-Si was ill equipped to deal with Silver at full force and fell victim to the Silver Bullet (AngleSlam) to take the loss. Winner: Silver and Pierette, via pinfall Post-match Silver took the microphone. SILVER What a disappointment you are Juicy Cantu-Si. I expected a lot better from you. This frankly sucks. You, Mariachi and Chick aren't worthy enough to be the guiding light of the six man division. The Menagerie will be needing those six man titles back, thanks. Gretchen wasn't exactly much for building her partner's confidence back up. GRETCHEN Sheep fornicating cur! COACH The cinderella run for 3 Amigos is about to end. Turn them fuckboys into pumpkins! COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 At the state of the art and high tech interview set backstage, Josh Matthews stands with a snarling Bobbi Cheesecake of Sunrise. JOSH Bobbi Cheesecake, your problems with Malaysia don't seem to be going away. BOBBI You should rethink how you put that. Malaysia's problems with me don't seem to be going away. JOSH Strong words to be sure. BOBBI But, I so get it, Malaysia, I really do. It must make you feel like crap knowing people pay thousands and thousands of dollars to be abused, insulted and treated like garbage by me, but for you, you basically have to club someone over the head to give you any attention. I really do feel for you, Malaysia. Honestly. Lose the Kate Gossellin circa 2011 hair cut and you might get some looks your way, but none at my expense. JOSH Whoa now, are you sure you want to insult Malaysia so openly? BOBBI Why not? She didn't beat me at SluttyMania, and she still seems fascinated with me. But then again I didn't beat her. Hmmm what to do, what to do. Boom, idea. As your dominatrix career winds down, and you head into the long road of being a good sub, Malaysia, you'll need to be broken in. And what better way to do that then at School's Out in a Malaysia's Dungeon match. Although, it'll be my dungeon when we're finished and you'll my bottom bitch. JOSH Bobbi, thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 *** Mr. Dick, Oscar Friberg & Tanner Neptune w/ U.S. Champion Blaine Cayley & Samantha Cayley vs. Big Papa Thrust w/ the Freakazoids, Logan Mann w/ Holly & Alexander The Brutal *** As result of what occurred earlier in the show, the OAOAST Galaxy was treated to an exciting 6-man tag featuring a unique mix of OAOAST superstars, particularly the trio of BPT, Logan and ATB. And make no mistake about it, ATB took no joy partnering with the men on his team (two of the most hated in the OAOAST). Likewise they weren’t especially fond of ATB, but the threesome managed to put their differences aside to emerge victorious when ATB made Tanner tap with the crossface. BLAINE Tsk. SAMMIWinners: Big Papa Thrust, Logan Mann & Alexander The Brutal, via submission. Following the match, as MD and Oscar continued to brawl with Logan and BPT, Blaine decided to replay ATB from earlier with a vintage ::beltshot:: RENEE & COACH Brother and sister then walked away hand-in-hand visibly pleased. BLAINE & SAMMI Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 Backstage in the discordant PYM dressing room we find Sugar BelleFlair passing back and forth with her women's title over her shoulder. SUGAR Hurry, hurry. The door swings open and two of Sugar's assigned security comes in with cash in hand. SUGAR Dunk and Lunk! You got it? Where is it? LUNK (hands over the cash) Here ya go, Sugar, Cinnamon's money in the bank. Just like you asked. SUGAR You dunce cap wearing morons! That's a briefcase! The Money In The Bank Briefcase! This is pocket change! Not what I asked! DUNK So you want us to give it back. SUGAR …....No I'll keep it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 *** OAOAST Tag Team Champions Hood Again w/ Marcellus vs. The Keyboard Warriors (Tango & Cla$h & HR_Blocked) *** Looking to serve a little “hood justice” after their ride was vandalized a few weeks back (eventually revealed to be the work of the Keyboard Warriors after many internally suspected the Christ Air Express), the tag champs were struck by how tall and beefy their anonymous foes were. RENEE These guys don’t fit the stereotype of anonymous keyboard warriors. COACH Apparently they’ve heard of the gym. Suddenly a text message appeared on the AngleTron telling the champs to “man up” and put the titles on the line. “Not chicken r u? #bawk” Marcellus looked at his nephews and asked, “Well?” Then the guys jumped on the Keyboard Warriors! COACH I guess not! A wild brawl ensues for the next several minutes. The situation is so chaotic the ref is about ready to call the match over. Then the CHRIST AIR EXPRESS hit the ring to attack the Keyboard Warriors! “YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" RENEE Remember how many suspected the CAE to be the ones behind vandalizing Hood Again’s ride? They obviously haven’t forgotten and clearly harbor ill will towards the men truly responsible. And rightfully so for dragging their name through the mud. The bell sounds repeatedly as the CAE and HA do a number on the Keyboard Warriors. MEL then begins tearing away at one of the men’s mask, prompting JOEY THE RAT to run out and try to pull the guy out to safety… but the mask rips to reveal TANGO BOSLEY! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Bosley pounds the apron in frustration. With his partner exposed the other KW unmasks as CPA! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" RENEE It’s VICE! COACH Then what happened to the Keyboard Warriors? RENEE VICE must’ve taken them out knowing Moses and Kawhi were so eager to face the Keyboard Warriors they’d likely agree to put the tag titles on the line. They just didn’t plan on the CAE wanting revenge on the Keyboard Warriors as well. BOSLEY, CPA & JOEY HA and the CAE stare VICE down then turn to each other. Clearly the CAE would like another shot at the gold and the champs know it, holding their titles high and proud.Winners: Double DQ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 Its a lavish pool party tonight and your lame ass ain't invited! But Tyler Bryant sure was, and he's currently putting sunscreen on Lorelei DeCenzo's bare back as she looks over her phone. LORELEI Would you like me to read some mean tweets? TYLER Mean tweets? Why bother, I know I've made a lot of enemies. They keep trying to take the energy, drain the wave from me. LORELEI The wave, you say. TYLER The wave. I hear fairytales about how they're gonna run up on me. Tyler stands up and shouts out to the world. TYLER Well run up when you see me, then we gonna see! LORELEI Sit down, child. Calmed, Tyler has a seat and resumes his duties. LORELEI Let's read someone else's mean tweets. The official Keyboard Warrior account says “Biffman=coward. Failed to protect us from THE FLEX. #superloser” TYLER I had high hopes for Biffman, always chatting about who he's gonna save, so we still gonna see. But, reply back to the Keyboard Warriors, and tell them a real hero will fight THE FLEX. LORELEI I don't think you- TYLER A real hero named Shayne Brave. LORELEI FIRE & ICE VS PRETTY YOUNG MONEY THE MAINEVEN IS NEXT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted May 4, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 4, 2015 I tried to find you at the bottom of a bottle Laying down on the bathroom floor My loneliness was a rattle in the windows You said you don't want me anymore And you left me Standing on a corner crying, Feeling like a fool for trying I don't even remember Why I'm wasting all these tears on you I wish I could erase our memory Cause you didn't give a damn about me Oh, finally I'm through Wasting all these tears on you These tears on you There's no love shown for the arriving duo of Sugar Flair and Melissa Nerdly. Even as they hit an impressive and well synced twirl the fans still can't give them anything but jeers and taunts. Such is the life of a failed country group! BUFFER The following tag match is scheduled for one fall...now making their way to the ring, representing PRETTY YOUNG MONEY, “CANADIAN COUNTRY” MELISSA NERDLY, and the OAOAST Women's Champion “THE NATURE GIRL” SUGAR BELLEFLAIR! RENEE Sugar might be a thief, but she is the longest running champion in the OAOAST. She's held her belt since Halloween Spectacular of last year. COACH That's them Flair genes, baby girl. Melissa smiles and offers waves and cheers to the fans, while Sugar is ready to start a near riot to rival any recent one we've seen! I was reminiscing just the other day, While having coffee all alone and Lord, it took me away. Back to a first-glance feeling on New York time. Back when you fit in my poems like a perfect rhyme. Took off faster than a green light, go, Hey, skip the conversation when you already know. I left a note on the door with a joke we’d made, And that was the first day. And darling, it was good never looking down. And right there where we stood was holy ground. “Holy Ground” by Taylor Swift pumps out with real live drummers bouncing towards the ceiling and banging a sick beat! Cinnamon Spoons prefers to bang her beat on her sister, Annagret's, sweet ass! The problem arises when ChubChub wants to drum on Annagret's ass too! ANNAGRET I swear on my life if you don't learn to control this stupid animal I'm selling to dwarven slavers. CINNAMON Not the dwarves! BUFFER And their opponents, “THE ANARCHIC ANGEL” ANNAGRET WICKEDBORN, “MISS WOMEN'S MONEY IN THE BANK” CINNAMON SPOONS, FIIIIREEEEEE AAAAAAANNNNDDDD IIICEEEEEE! “YYYEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Cinnamon is on a floating platform, dancing the night away.... CINNAMON ANNAGRET And I'm stuck Pegasus sitting! RENEE Cinnamon is all set to cash in her women's title contract at School's Out. We'll also see the women's tag title defended by St.Archibald's School For Bad Girls, against Bohemoth.com COACH The Man's women! DING DING CINNAMON Return the stolen gold, you putrid purloiner! SUGAR No! CINNAMON If you don't, I might just have to lose my temper! Grrrr! ... Aw, c'mon, please? Those are my special hero savings! ANNAGRET Ugh! Sugar and Cinnamon lockup with Sugar getting shoved all the way into the ropes. Fighting mad, Sugar cames back with a lariat that C innamon turns into a deep arm drag! SUGAR You did it now! Miss BelleFlair comesa after Cinnamon with another lariat and gets upeneded with a second arm drag! SUGAR Melissa, you deal with her. RENEE What happened to you did it now?! Melissa hops over the ropes, continuing her eternal quest against the supernaturals. The two Hotties also lockup with Cinnamon forcing her foe into an empty corner. Cinnamon gives a clean break, but that doesn't stop Melissa from nailing her with a chop block! “BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” MELISSA There ain't nothing clean when you fight the devil's minions! RENEE A valkyrie is like the exact opposite of a devil minion. Melissa stomps away at Cinnamon, but The Spice of Life still manages to get to her feet. Yet when she does Melissa throws her down with a bodyslam then hits bodysplash into a lateral press... ONE! Kickout! COACH Yo, this horse, ChubChub, is eating my Jordans! RENEE Are you still acting like they're real? COACH That ain't the point. Melissa lifts Cinnamon's leg up and proceeds to drop an elbow onto the inside of the knee. With Cinnamon trapped, Melissa applies a leg lock. CINNAMON Devilish fiend! You'll let go me if you're smart! MELISSA Well, I ain't smart! ANNAGRET That's for sure. Cinnamon uses her supernatural strength to power out the hold, greatly upsetting Melsisa. Canadian Country gets to her feet, but Cinnamon overturns her with a biiiiiiig back body drop! MELISSA Lordie, that hurt! While Melissa frets over a broken leg, Cinnamon looks to tag in Annagret CINNAMON To the fray, trusty ward! ANNAGRET I'm not your ward. CINNAMON To the fray, trusted sidekick! ANNAGRET I'm so not that either. I'm your sister because mom swears your related. I have my doubts. In the end is a tag is made, and Melissa isn't happy to see Cinnamon. RENEE Melissa's a big boxing fan, lets see if she land more punches than Pacman? Canadian Country gets off to the good start, blasting Annagret with body blows. After those attacks conclude she whips the tall blond to the ropes. But, Annagret comes back with a mighty big boot! ANNAGRET Let's see how flexible you are. ANNAGRET Not too bad, I'll put in a good word to Sunshine Yukino. MELISSA A brothel! A brothel! I'm gonna be sold into sex slavery! Melissa scrambles out her flexible position and rushes to tag in Sugar! ANNAGRET So you'd rather the midget get sold into sex slavery? RENEE Sugar won her women's title by beating Annagret all the way back at Halloween Spectacular. Lightning doesn't strike twice for Sugar as she's beat all around the ring with knife edge chops! COACH Yo, I swear this damn horse is about to take a piss on me! I swear! RENEE He's a pegasus. Maybe if you got his species right he'd quit acting up. Sugar tries to get out off the ring, but there's nothing doing in that department; Annagret throws her down with a pinning back suplex.... ONE! TWO! Kickout! The women's champion is whipped so hard into the corner she's pushed back towards her foe. Annagret tags her in the stomach with a knee that has her doubled up. Off the ropes comes the leggy babe, using those long legs for a scissors kick! RENEE Widow's Wail! “YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” The cover.... ONE! TWO! The kickout! Annagret pulls Sugar up and launches her into the ropes. When Annagret throws a lariat, Sugar ducks and goes behind her. However, Annagret switches the hold and gets a boobietastic waistlock. SUGAR Soooooo soft. ANNAGRET No freebies! Annagret decides to fling Sugar over with a German suplex, but Sugar flips out of the hold. When Annagret turns around, Sugar brings her down with a hurricanrana into a pin.... ONE! TWO! Kickout! Not wanting anything to do with Annagret, Sugar gives the tag to Melissa! “BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Sugar holds Annagret in place just long enough for Melissa to use a superfly splash on her! The cover.... ONE! TWO! Shoulder up! MELISSA Lord, forgive me for this win I'm about to receive! After that odd bit of prayer, Melissa hits an arm wrench hook kick that dumps Annagret backwards. The babyface is hit in the back of the head by Sugar, and stumbles into a front Russian leg sweep by Melissa! RENEE Number One With a Bullet! The cover.... ONE! TWO! Shoulder up! MELISSA That's alright, that's alright. The lord just wants me to entertain ya'll a lil bit longer, bring light to your lives. Ain't that right Sugar? SUGAR You better finish her off or I'm gonna pants you! That threat in mind, Melissa snags a front facelock on Annagret. From there she raises her into the air to look for a vertical suplex. Yet Annagret uses a wave of knees to get out of the attack. Irate, Melissa comes after Annagret and gets blasted with a big boot! “YYYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAA!” ANNAGRET I'm the only god in your life. Annagret reaches backwards and applies the tag to Cinnamon! “YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” CINNAMON Dun-dun-dun, the toughie masher arrives! Hold on that didn't sound right. Do-over! No do-over in the OAOAST as Melissa brings Cinnamon in the hard way. ANNAGRET If she wasn't a valkyrie she'd be dead by now, not even gonna lie. Melissa hits the ropes, seeking out her Hell on Heels bicycle kick finisher. But Cinnamon rolls beneath the hold and avoids the attack! Cinnamon then lifts Melissa onto her shoulders in a fireman's carry and executes a lethal flapjack! “YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” RENEE Cinnamon Challenge! Cinnamon hooks the legs for the pin.... ONE! TWO! Sugar breaks up the pinfall! Annagret is on Sugar with goddess worthy fury! Suagr tries to beat a hasty retreat, but Annagret catches hold of her and flings her overhead with a belly to belly. RENEE Big Papa Thrust has to be so impressed with move right now. COACH And them legs. CINNAMON The buns are ready! Cinnamon tries use CinnaBuns her butt bump to a kneeling Sugar! But Sugar has no thought of letting this happen. SUGAR Keep those butt cheeks out my face, freakshow! Sugar manages to push Cinnamon at Melissa....who pushes Cinnamon back at Sugar and gets her hit in the face with those yummy CinnaBuns anyway! MELISSA CINNAMON Let's vanquish the bad guys and cry victory to the four winds! Or is it five? Maybe its three? ANNAGRET Ugh, let's just hit our finish. CINNAMON That's what I was saying! ANNAGRET I hate you so much sometimes I can't take it. Fire & Ice delivers crushing punishment to PYM as Cinnamon hits a styles clash on Sugar, and Annagret hits one on Melissa! “YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAA!” RENEE Wicked Cinnamon Toast Whisper Crunch! The double cover... CROWD ONE! CROWD TWO! CROWD THREE! DING DING DING BUFFER Your winners as a result of a pinfall....FIRE AND ICE! “YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” CINNAMON Listen, sister, to the roar of the crowd! “Rah! Rah!” “Great job, you two!” “Marry me, Cinnamon!” “Cinnamon, you're every bit as a attractive as your sister!” ANNAGRET Please! RENEE Give it up to Fire and Ice, they came, they saw, they butt bumped and they conquered! COACH Yeah but, the way wrestling works is whoever wins the tag match loses the singles match at the pay per view, so Cinnamon fucked up. RENEE Coach, is getting his walking papers for exposing the business, so it'll be just me seeing you next week! FADE OUT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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