Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 Seeing that the show is already late, we'll just SYN the intro! ***Tony Tourettes W/Congressman Joel Duncan Vs Sloppy Joe*** RENEE The fat versus the obese. And if you remember these two actually faced off in the 24/7 title tournament. COACH Ain't no one remember that shit. RENEE That's why I reminded them, Coach. Professionalism! This was of course not a technical affair. Or a pretty affair. Or even a tolerable affair. It was a battle of two fat asses more concerned about lucky charms and snicker bars than fighting. But when the food ran scarce the real battle begin. CONGRESSMAN DUNCAN Don't tell these two yahoos but I've got a half eaten kit-kat in my underwear. RENEE Really? You better prove it. COACH Joe, having more training, was able to overpower Tony. But when Tony started bringing out the weapons his fortunes improved. The two men wound up battering each other with everything they could get their hands on. But it was all for naught as the rest of THE MENAGERIE suddenly jumped Tony Tourettes! Leon delivered a One Hit Kill on Tony and allowed Joe to make the pinfall! Winner and new 24/7 champion: Sloppy Joe, via pinfall Post-match Leon had a microphone. LEON We reap what we sow in this world. What religion doesn't make that sort of comment. But what if others reaped what we sowed. What if your neighbor was punished for your crimes? Now that the Devil Inside, Leon Rodez, runs the realms, you can expect just that. Eggther, if you and your bonehead friends don't call of your war against me, everyone will suffer. Everyone but you. Leon drops down the microphone and leaves the ring. The rest of The Menagerie follow with Pierertte and Silver offering hearty congrats to Sloppy Joe for his title victory. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 Backstage in front of the Pretty Young Money dressing room we find women's champion Sugar Flair and December Belle engaged in a verbal battle. SUGAR December, I see what's going on. DECEMBER You do?! Oh no. Oh no. I haven't worked on the butterflypedia for three days! SUGAR I don't care about yer dumb butterflies. You're pressed because I one up'ed ya last week with my best friends forever. DECEMBER Annagret had you encased in a cage of fire. You wet your pants. It was on the App. SUGAR Dang it, December, you become real annoying real fast. DECEMBER I'm the annoying one now? SUGAR You always been a thorn in my side. And my front. And my back. And what a back it is! Whooooo~! But I been out of yer shadow since October, deal with it! I'm over and done with taking orders from you. I got real friends now to boss me around! DECEMBER Hmmmm. That doesn't seem to be the argument you want to present. SUGAR If you can find four other people who give two hoots about ya bring em to the ring and face my best friends! DECEMBER Okay, I'll do that. Thanks for the advice. December's nonchalance is just enough for Sugar to turn bright red and haul off. TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT BEST FRIENDS FOREVER VS BEST FRIENDS FOREVER TONIGHT! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 Inside The All XFL Team dressing room, Rhaenys approaches her sister with a broad almost cheesy grin. RHAENYS Prepare to be jealous. ALYSANNE I would never be jealous of you. You're my sister and your joys are my joys. RHAENYS Actually, no. They're mine. Look at this text message, Xavier sent me. Alysanne leans in to look at Rhaenys phone. ALYSSANE “Sup, sweet thang, I down D-T-F. You?” What's D-T-F? Down town fun? RHAENYS Down to fuck! ALYSANNE RHAENYS He wants me bad. ALYSANNE Are you sure? This isn't actually from his phone. RHAENYS He used a burner of course. A throw away phone. You need to be more aware of the workings of the modern male mind. ALYSANNE You're so right, I'm such a naive woman. RHAENYS Its one of your faults, but I love you all the same. I have to throw on some lip gloss and I'm off to see Xavier. Rhaenys is on cloud nine as she walks away from her sister. ALYSANNE Good luck. You might just need it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 *** Tango Bosley w/ CPA vs. MARV w/ MEL *** In a small preview of next week’s 2015 Anderson Cup Finals between VICE and the Christ Air Express, Bosley scored the W after ducking through the ropes during a rolling back cradle attempt by MARV, allowing CPA to land a cheap shot in the form of his knockout GIGATON PUNCH.Winner: Tango Bosley, via pinfall. After the match the guys taunted the CAE. REENE Will VICE still be laughing after they face the CAE next week in the 2015 Anderson Cup Finals? COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 Our view is on Rhaenys, who is giddy about her meeting with The XFL. There's a pep in her step and not her usual snobbish walk. She soon approaches a meeting room near the garage of the arena. RHAENYS Here I come, my chocolate prince! Rhaenys opens the door... AND HAS LIKE A MILLION FUCKING ANTS DUMPED ON HER HEAD! RHAENYS NOOOOO! AISLING (OS) HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA! The lights flip on and we see Clar Aisling DeLacey and Sabrina Oakheart, holder of a BIG BUCKET! SARBINA There's, like, a thousand Mister Ants on you! You look so stupid I could puke. As you can expect Rhaenys does dance around like a woman with ants in her pants. RHAENYS YOU BITCHES! YOU BITCHES! WAAAHAAAAAH! SABRINA If you squish em with your finger they make a funny popping sound! RHAENYS I HATE YOU! I FUCKING HATE YOU! AISLING (in rocker voice) That was for Archie, but when we win the tag belts at Sluttymania, that for rock n roll, biiiiiiiaaaaaatttch! Ohhhhhhhh yeaaaaaaah! The School for Bad Girls walks of giggling and Rhaenys continues to fret and panic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 In a interview conducted with OAOAST Original Tony Brannigan backstage at the world famous interview lounge, Big Papa Thrust and his Freakazoids all had a laugh over the sick game played at the expense of Mr. Dick last week. As video of said incident aired, Malaysia remarked how MD always was soft on her. BPT quickly added now MD was just soft period because they broke him in more ways than one last week. They not only tore his heart out -- just like MD did when he “stole“ Oohlala according to BPT -- but they also ripped his balls from its sack! As it turns out, they nearly did. Brannigan noted MD sustained a strain groin in the attack but vowed revenge, challenging BPT to a match at AngleMania XIV. BRANNIGAN It seems the man still has balls. BPT and the girls were not amused. But the Big Bad Glutei Daddy accepted the challenge, vowing to send MD into early retirement just like Malaysia will do to Oohlala in their match tonight. MALAYSIA Then you two can grow old and fat together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 ***Simon Singleton W/Molly Nerdly Vs Flynn Stevens*** Having trained with Ned, Simon was ready for dealing with a martial arts expert. Even so Flynn's kicks and blows hurt more than your average OAOAST star. They hurt enough that Simon tried to put Flynn away early with the Live and Let Die choke suplex. But Flynn escaped and countered with his trademark sitout gordbuster. The Boston native kept control of the match, but could never seal the deal so to speak. Simon's experience won out, and he won the match when he dodged a left high kick and rolled up Flynn! Winner: Simon Singleton, via pinfall! Let's look in live! COACH No doubt, Simon is on his A game. RENEE And his stubble is on his A game. Looking good to match wrestling good! Flynn stands upright, ready to continue the fight against Simon. RENEE I don't think Flynn's too happy with the result. How about losing with grace? But before Flynn can attack Simon, he's hammered from behind by COLIN MAGUIRE SR! CROWD RENEE Colin's dad! COACH Yo, I don't want know part of this! Coach really does hide like a chicken shit. But maybe its a good idea, as Maguire SR pitches Flynn over the ropes and to the outside! MOLLY What's going on? MAGUIRE SR What do you think, girl? Maguire SR uses a big swing to hammer Flynn's head into the guardrail! Blood instantly gushes from a fresh wound. MAGUIRE SR Where is my son?! Now Flynn is thrown into the steel steps shoulder first, and a crack is audible. RENEE This isn't your run of the mill senior citizen, guys, this is a Valkyrie! MAGUIRE SR Where is my son?! Simon has seen enough and makes moves to intervene on Flynn's behalf. SIMON Haven't you heard? Torture yields middling results. Maguire SR may have heard but he doesn't care as he shoves Simon to the ground! “BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” MOLLY Simon! SIMON I'm alright. Flynn is out of it, a victim of his terrible assault. As such Maguire SR has no choice but to back up the stage in disgust. MAGUIRE I will kill my son! COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 Inside the locker room, we see Tyler Bryant sat staring off into space. Sure enough he's approached by his life long best friend and tag team partner, Shayne Brave. SHAYNE Tyler, dude. Tyler glances up at Shayne. SHAYNE Jade and Lorelei, at SluttyMania One. Dude, that's crazy. Lorelei screwed us, but still....what do you think, dude? Tyler rises and turns frozen grey eyes upon Shayne. Frozen and foreign to this best friend. TYLER I think you need to focus more on your career and less on Lorelei and Jade. Dude. And with that Tyler sits back down, not even thinking to continue the conversation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 2, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 2, 2015 *** Lucius Soul w/ Rico de Janeiro vs. Alexander The Brutal *** OAOAST United States Champion Oscar Friberg served as guest commentator for the match. - Oscar hyped his upcoming title defense vs. Logan Mann at AngleMania XIV. Naturally. - He also got grilled by Coach over Alexander’s involvement at Anglepalooza, even bringing up Logan’s talking point about the two conspiring together against him. Oscar called out Coach for drinking the Kool-Aid and noted Logan has more heat than the sun. REENE That’s a lot of heat! Coach then tried to cause heat between Oscar, Blaine Cayley and Alexander over what occurred during their 6-man a couple weeks ago. Oscar saw through Coach’s game but pointed out Blaine and Alexander were a couple of headstrong guys. As for the match, Alexander put Lucius away with the crossface. In fact, he didn’t even have the hold fully applied when Lucius began tapping! Winner: Alexander The Brutal, via submission. But the taste of victory was short-lived as Rico, dressed in a ROBE for reasons that left everybody wondering, pounced on Alexander following the bout. REENE I sure hope Rico has underwear beneath that robe! “OSCAR!” “OSCAR!” “OSCAR!” With his name echoing throughout the arena, the U.S. Champion rose from his comfy seat at Sofa Central and was prepared to leap into action only to be beaten to the punch by… BLAINE CAYLEY! “YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Blaine sprinted right towards Rico, stripping him of his robe, leaving the Brazilian in his boxers as college student Sammi joins her brother in the ring. COACH I wonder what’s got home boy hot under the collar?* BZZZZZZT *OMG~! As luck would have it, we learn the answer thanks to the mysterious hidden camera. We see Sammi, in his school girl outfit, eagerly run to the Team Scream dressing room where inside RICO DE JANEIRO lays across a trio of chairs very seductively with his robe wide open and playing with his hairy chest! SAMMI Aah! Where’s Blaine? RICO This isn’t about your brother, chica. It’s about us. Never have I seen a more beautiful woman in my life. That innocent face, those eyes of a wild tiger. SAMMI Get out of here. Now! RICO But I must have you. SAMMI You’ll have nothing and like it. Now go. Rico pops up and places Sammi’s hand over his heart. RICO Feel my lust. Now let me feel-- SAMMI I said go! RICO Ah, I forget about you American girls. Rico reaches into his robe pocket and pulls out some Mardi Gras beads. RICO (twirling beads) Hmm. “Jive Soul Bro” cues in background, so this obviously occurs moments before Lucius’s match. RICO Perhaps another time. *kisses Sammi’s hand* Rico exits. SAMMI (wipes hand) Creep. Out in the halls we see Rico make a left, then moments later we see Blaine going back to the TS dressing room muttering to himself. BLAINE (under breath) Sophie wants to see me my ass. Asshole. * BZZZZZZT *OMG~! Back LIVE, Blaine is still pissed. And Rico has a mic! RICO Hey mang, what can I say. Rico loves the chicas and the chicas love Rico. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" RICO & LUCIUS RICO But I tell you what, you obviously don’t approve of me as a suitor for your sister’s heart and I get that. You her big brother. But it ain’t her heart I’m after mang… REENE BLAINE Blaine demands a mic and gets one. BLAINE The only thing you’re gonna get is an ass-kicking! ‘Cause right here next week it’s gonna be my pleasure to kick BOTH your asses! Alexander grabs the mic. ALEXANDER Not alone you won’t. (seething, to MGHFC) We’re not through yet either! RICO & LUCIUS REENE Perhaps the Mardi Gras Hellfire Club have bitten off more than they can chew! COMMERCIAL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2015 KRISTA'S MANSION Descending down this impressive staircase is the even more impressive... KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN KRISTA Landon, lets chat, you and I. Royal to royal. Oh, I can hear your shrill squirrel masturbating voice now. “You are not royalty”, you'll scream, as you orgasm over an acorn find. But I am queen of an ever profitable fitness empire, one that's earned me enough cash to pay your parents to toss your baby pictures into a dumpster fire. Or if the payment rendered is enough, toss you into the fire. Isn't that a pleasing thought! KRISTA And like you I am queen of my castle. Except my castle isn't the two bedroom in a failing suburban you found on roomates.com and share with a man who's no longer allowed to see his children. Mine is the kind of palace that makes poor people's eyes melt and heart shatter to bits. In addition I have two very lovely princesses. Krista strides into her living room, which now features a ruby and diamond encrusted throne. But better than that is what sits at the bottom of the throne... MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN MAYA and JADE Yes you do mother. Maya and Jade lavish kisses upon their mommy dearest's perfectly tanned legs. KRISTA Good girls. Landy you fret and panic over a belt you've only won twice. A belt I've won eight times while you were out being intimidated by a man who couldn't get on HeldDOWN for a ten bell salute if he died, Nathaniel Black, and were having your kingdom overran by the likes of Remy Bazil, piss fetishist. You attack, Zack Malibu, who for some reason claimed to be my friend. I don't know what that was about. Maya what was I doing while Landon was losing his shit? MAYA You were boring out my slutty teenage cunt, mommy. KRISTA And did you enjoy it, sweetling? MAYA I cummed so fucking hard so many times. Maya traces her fingers along her mommy's lovely legs, all while Jade moves her tongue up along them. The feel and taste of their hot, horny mother is incredible. KRISTA And Jade while Landy is left fuming and ranting about this segment, what will I be doing to you? JADE You'll be banging my big ass until I howl. KRISTA Howl and what? JADE Squeal? KRISTA Good girl. JADE KRISTA Well then, I have family business to attend to. But, I just want everyone to know I have a super duper surprise all set for next week. See ya then. MAYA Mommy, what should I do while you're ass fucking Jade? KRISTA Why watch and finger yourself of course. MAYA Yay! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2015 *** Malaysia w/ Big Papa Thrust & Busty Rose vs. Oohlala *** What was supposed to be a one-on-one bout turned into a 2 on 1 attack as Malaysia and Busty pounced on Oohlala before the bell even sounded. Just when it appeared BPT and the Freakazoids were gonna make good on their promise to send Oohlala into early retirement, BOBBI CHEESECAKE sprinted to the ring and got her some of Malaysia! COACH What the heck? REENE Bobbi doesn’t want to wait until SluttyMania, she wants her some of Malaysia like right now! As all 4 ladies battled it out inside, referee Nick Patrick shrugged his shoulders and allowed the mayhem to continue as a…*** Texas Tornado Tag Match: Malaysia & Busty Rose vs. Oohlala & Bobbi Cheesecake *** In a mini-preview of 2 singles match at SluttyMania that was chaotic and sometimes ugly, the team of Oohlala and Bobbi emerged victorious after Oohlala nailed Busty with a Stiff Kick.Winners: Oohlala & Bobbi, via pinfall. Malaysia and BPT fumed after the match over Bobbi’s involvement. MALAYSIA I am going to so break you, little girl. *bites lip* Bobbi invited back in, but Malaysia decided its best to live to fight another day, leaving Bobbi and Oohlala to celebrate their W. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2015 Backstage in an office we find poor Spencer Reiger being grilled by little Morgan Nerdly SPENCER I don't have time to do what you're asking me to do! MORGAN I just want all sharp objects cleared out the hotel for SluttyMania. Aren't you a do-gooder? SEPNCER I can't get all the sharp objects cleared out. I have no authority to do that. MORGAN It'd be very bad for you if your wife's best friend got gutted by Pierette. Wouldn't you think? SPENCER Why me? Morgan gives a fake yawn. SPENCER Stop that. MORGAN Stop what? SPENCER Yawning at me. MORGAN Whatever. I'm leaving. SPENCER Where are you going? MORGAN You're useless, so I'm going back to my room. SPENCER I don't want you to get hurt. Maybe I can help. My family has connections overseas. MORGAN Except I don't work in maybes. SPENCER I hate making promises I can't keep. MORGAN But you need motivation. Right? Something to spur you to action. I understand, don't worry. Morgan rubs her fingers along Spencer's MANLY~! Shoulders. MORGAN Did you know they call me the Blowjob Cutie? SPENCER MORGAN Because I'm cute as hell and I give badass blowjobs. I'll lick the head, slobber on your balls, deep throat your cock, I have no gag reflex. And if that's what it takes to keep sharp objects out of Pirette's reach. Well, your cock is a big price to pay and I'm happy to pay it. SPENCER Ah! Gloss! Gloss! Dipping down to her knees Morgan finds that Spence's pecker is already pressing against his pants. MORGAN That's no sharp object in there. Her fingers slowly pull down the zipper and inch by inch brings more of the penis forward. It potrudes out at her like fat piece of sausage. Yummy, yummy, thinks Morgan. MORGAN Not sharp, but very big. Morgan's fingers dance across the top of the member, as if they were playing some sort of insturment. It almost is an insturment and The Blowjob Cutie calls herself a maestro. MORGAN Nice and fat. Just think you were gonna let me leave this room without sucking your cock. Morgan doesn't suck it. Not yet. Instead she gently, teasingly, and cooly traces her index fingers on his nut sack. SPENCER Gloss is my wife! MORGAN And I'm sure she's been nothing but faithful to you. Oh that's right she hasn't been because I've been fucking her in the ass. To emphasize her point Morgan reaches around and clutches on Spencer's butt with a tight grip that betrays her petite size. MORGAN You've got a lovely wife. And I have a lovely bitch. Now keep your mouth shut and let me suck you off. Morgan's long tongue slithers from her thin lips. The beautiful snake reaches the head of Spencer's cock and begins swirling about the dick hole. Its just one tiny spot, but Morgan plays with it so amazingly and so expertly its like his entire body feels the pleasure. MORGAN That's where the cum comes from. Do you ever cum on Gloss' face. SPENCER Private! Private! MORGAN That's a no. Morgan teases gulping the entirety of his dick within her mouth, but she pulls back and just shakes her head at a disappointed Spencer. MORGAN Shy and demure, but you want me to lodge that dick in my tiny mouth. That doesn't add up. An “ahhhhh” sounds comes from Morgan's mouth all thanks to how she bounces the cock on her outstretched tongue. Up and down it goes, Spencer feeling thrilled when it hits that long monster and feeling dejected when she lets it go. MORGAN I can't wait to tell Melissa how I sucked you off. I'll tell her loudly and often and in as many vulgar details as I can remember. Morgan pulls in half of Spencer's delicious dick, yet just leaves it there. Just leaves this pulsing hard fat cock in her little mouth on her tounge. Just gazes up at Spencer with those perfect clear blue eyes, full of a wicked innocence. MORGAN Heh. But thankfully that these doesn't last long. She's not the blowjob cutie from messing around. Our little lady swings her tongue around Spencer's hot rod, lavishing the viens in sweet salivia, while cupping his big drooping balls. MORGAN Nice nuts, Spencer! Gloss failed to leave those out her accounts of fucking you. Morgan coaxes the cock up and down, grinding her wealth of spit into the pink skin, keeping Spencer on a horny wild edge. And why not? He has both Morgan's spit and her delicate hands on his dick? He starts involuntarily thrusting against her, and that's when Morgan knows she has to take him into her mouth. She opens wide and swallows in his chubby pecker, just like Gloss would. And now Spencer has the luck of having been blown by both of True Blood Sisters! Morgan goes to fierce work on the dick, swinging her head from side to side, tossing the fat monster back and forth between the walls of her mouth. Each time it hits, the flesht sensation gives her a shock all the way to her cunt. Spencer's cock bulges her out and fills her up, leaving her wondering how he'd feel crammed up her tight pussy. There are times when she's bouncing the dick around her mouth that she feels it jerk and shake, like a river of cum is about to flow through her throat. Morgan has no intention on neglecting Spencer's balls, and wraps her little lips around them. These big freshly shaven nuts blow out her mouth to almost obscene proportions. Her tongue is bunched up, so little room is given to her by these giant testicles. Spencer's cock is still played with, Morgan using her hands to jerk him off. She tears her hands up and down, rapid fire, the sound of saliva and skin moving up and down filling the air, along with Morgan slobbering on the balls. Morgan knows her hands can work even better than her mouth and so begins dancing them atop his plumb shaped head. Bits and bits of precum ooze out and Morgan leans in for a tiny taste of his man juices. Delightful she thinks. MORGAN I love the way your cock smells. The sweat, the semen, the piss. Morgan runs her cute nose up and down the rod, getting a good whiff of this manly scene of Grade A fuck meat. Once done with that, Morgan gives Spencer a handjob in earnest. Her grip is tight, almost painful, but both she and he love the feel of her hand around the cock. Her palms get massaged by every vein and contour of the fat meat, and the head gets jerked up and down with its lovely skin. Soon enough Spencer shudders, and Morgan takes fuck stick into her mouth to taste that river of cum. MORGAN Love the semen. Morgan starts licking the cum off her fingers.. MORGAN Do we have a deal? SPENCER Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2015 The OAOAST SPINEBUSTER OF THE WEEK~! spotlighted Judge Dudd and the Army of 1 Nation complaining about the letter received from OAOAST boss lady Sophie chiding them for failing to compete/defend the OAOAST tag titles on a timely basis. As we returned live, the Judge and her men headed ringside for their scheduled title defense, which they were basically shamed into agreeing to do so last week. Reene noted the social media storm caused by the Ao1N after they claimed to have defeat every single OAOAST tag team in an open challenge Tag Team Turmoil bout at a non-televised event in Bloomington, Indiana. REENE Except the OAOAST never even held a show in Bloomington, or anywhere near Indiana for that matter! Yet so many, including media outlets, reported it as fact without ever bothering to take a single second to research the story, one that was just a simple internet search from uncovering the truth! Then for the Army of 1 Nation to challenge people calling shenanigans on their story to come fight them tonight in the ring? You’ve gotta be kidding me! The Ao1N reiterated the story and called out all the “keyboard warriors” who refuted their story. COACH I wanna see this! REENE Who’d be crazy enough to walk in off the streets to face two highly trained fighting machines like the Army of 1 Nation? At least two (one fat, one scrawny) in plain black spandex bodysuits (’cause they’re anonymous!) who come out to “Enter the Worms” by Cathedral. COACH Well I’ll be damned. Real life keyboard warriors! Despite their opponents odd and perhaps humorous appearance, the Ao1N are dead serious. They’re eager to send a statement. But they only watch as two YOUNG BLACK MEN jump out of the crowd and blindside the Keyboard Warriors, posting fatty and double power bombing scrawny on the steel steps! COACH Who the hell are these 2 dudes? REENE I think we’re all wondering the same thing. The 2 dudes jump into the ring as MARCELLUS WALLACE of South Central Militia fame joins the guys ringside brandishing a pimp cane. “HOLY SHIT!” “HOLY SHIT!” “HOLY SHIT!” BLACKHAWK, EAGLE EYE & JUDGE DUDD COACH That’s--That’s Marcellus Wallace of the South Central Militia! Former OAOAST tag champions! REENE You’re right, it is! The last anyone heard of Marcellus and his tag partner Vincent “Whitey Ford” Santana was years ago when both got sent to the big house. COACH And she doesn’t mean the University of Michigan football stadium people. The 2 dudes toss their button shirts aside and get down to their wife beaters, then signal for the Ao1N to bring it. The champs hesitate and get bum-rushed!*** Tag Team Title Match: The Army of 1 Nation © w/ Judge Dudd vs. 2 dudes (names unknown) *** To say the champs get the shit beat outta them is an understatement. Hit by a tidal wave of youth frustration and anger the Ao1N offer little resistance. Blackhawk is sent flying outside, leaving eagle Eye to fall victim to a devastating power bomb/double knee backbreaker combo for the shocking 1-2-3! JUDGE DUDD REENE New champions! COACH Unbelievable!Winners & New Tag Champions: 2 dudes (names unknown), via pinfall. Marcellus nods in approval as his 2 young charges are awarded the OAOAST tag titles. They celebrate with the man one can only assume is their mentor and exit through the crowd like they first appeared. REENE They say anything can happen in the OAOAST and it just did! Laying by timekeepers table is the fat Keyboard Warrior who grabs the mic after a brief struggle reaching for it. KEYBOARD WARRIOR (straining) Onward… keyboard… warriors! * drops mic & lays self out spread eagle * Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2015 *** Grudge Match: Mariachi w/ El Hijo del Sheep vs. Deuce Deuce Bigelow *** Just prior to the match both superstars instructed their respective stable mates to remain in the back, giving us the grudge match nearly a year in the making. REENE One man seeks to avenge the brutal slaying of his beloved furry amigo, the other looks to complete his diabolical revenge plot. And it was around this time over a year ago that Mariachi defeated Deuce. Summoning the warrior spirit hidden deep beneath his flamboyant exterior, Mariachi charged forward and somersaulted over the top rope onto Deuce! COACH Forget about the bell having not been rung yet, Deuce hadn’t even made it into the ring before being attacked! With the OAOAST Galaxy firmly behind him, the flaming luchador took it straight to Deuce, introducing him violently to the ringpost and clubbing away wildly. But the tide turned when Deuce reversed an Irish whip intended to send him crashing into the guardrail… or so it seemed. Instead Mariachi, displaying tremendous agility, leaped onto the guardrail and back at Deuce with a MOONSAULT… only to be CAUGHT and Snake Eyes’d on the steel ring steps! “OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” COACH Deuce would spend the next several minutes being the hell outta his foe, kicking and paint-brushing him. Even time Mariachi would attempt to fight back he’d receive a stiff clothesline or a hard forearm smash to the face. Then following a vicious power bomb Deuce would hit his trademark top rope diving head butt now dubbed the Flame-Boiled Whopper. A blow delivered to the heart of Mariachi… Again. And again. REENE Okay, that’s enough! Indeed it was, as Deuce sat down on Mariachi for the 1-2-3.Winner: Deuce Deuce Bigelow, via pinfall. But winning wasn’t enough for Deuce, he wanted to embarrass Mariachi the same way he felt embarrassed losing to him nearly a year ago and went for THE MASK~! COACH I think Deuce wants a souvenir from his big win. REENE Really? Isn’t getting the win enough? Referee Charles Robinson frantically tries to stop Deuce and is tossed aside like a rag doll. As Deuce unlaces the mask help arrives in the form of Mariachi’s other 2 amigos JUICY CANTU-SI and CHICK. “YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!" Deuce eats a couple of fists, but soon THE SLAUGHTERHOUSE hit the ring and do a number on Juicy and Chick, prompting every official and agent in the back to storm out and restore order. During the process Deuce decides to grab possession of EL HIJO DEL SHEEP and leaves with Slaughterhouse. COACH Looks like Deuce found him a souvenir! REENE Not El Hijo del Sheep! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2015 Backstage in the state of the art, expensivly assembled interview area, Josh Matthews stood with Cobra Strike and Melody Nerdly. JOSH Ned, Baron, Melody, your thoughts on Silver, who has declared himself in a feud with Cobra Strike. BLANCHARD Silver, son, you oughta change your name to Brown because your a real piece of shit. BOOOM! MELODY That sound was Silver hitting Ned in the back of the head with Scourge's lead pipe! BARON Damn it, man! Baron launches an attack on Silver but gets smacked in the stomach by the lead pipe! BARON Aggggh! With both members of Cobra Strike down and out, Silver takes hold of the microphone. SILVER I am the Ultimate Hope! And the Ultimate Hope will never lose to something as vile and depressing as a den of snakes! With one last shot to both Cobras, Silver walks off. MELODY Wait till I sick n00b on you, punk! TONIGHT'S MAINEVENT BEST FRIENDS FOREVER VS BEST FRIENDS FOREVER THE MAINEVENT IS NEXT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanel #99 Posted March 3, 2015 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2015 ***Sugar Flair, Melissa Nerdly, Anastasia Violetta, Amberlyn Duncan, Maggie Nerdly Vs Sunrise (Maya Duncan-Blanchard, Annagret Wickedborn, Megan Skye, Dasha Yuschenko, December Belle) With only Bobbi and Yuki absent Sunrise rolled out a major crew. AMBERLYN Why am I here? SUGAR Your my best friend forever, number one! WHOOOOO~! AMBERLYN Ahh! Why do you have to yell?! MAGGIE If she leaves, I leave. Sugar's team was in disarray, but at least the two toughest members of Sunrise were busy lezzing out. ANNAGRET to MAYA RENEE See, that's friendship! COACH Can I be your friend. RENEE All full up. But, thanks. Sugar made Amberlyn start against Megan and nearly lost the match right there/ It was only a frantic series of elbows that allowed Amberlyn to escape and tag in Melissa! AMBERLYN She was trying to hurt me! What is wrong with people? Melissa and Megan had a solid technical affair. But Hotties pulled out all the stops with chain wrestling that impressed the audience. DASHA Good to see super good wrestling, Melissa and Megan! SUGAR Shut up, you ain't allowed to talk to my best friend number three! You probably killed that Russian diplomat guy. You'd know Anastasia, wouldn't you? ANASTASIA You might have faulty intel. Dasha got into the ring and wowed the audience with her high flying attack. Both Melissa and Maggie fell victim to it, and then they feel victim to each other when Melissa accidentally ran into Maggie! MAGGIE You fucked up. Shocker. Dasha sought out a tuck senton spalsh, but missed and Maggie got the tag to Sugar Flair! Sugar came charging at December and Annagret but got hip tossed over the ropes and out the ring. She landed right on the camera... COACH I wanna get paid for Sugar to fall on me. RENEE You already get paid to sit next to me, I think that's good enough. COACH Girl, you ain't ever lied. Sugar allowed Anastasia to take her place, which turned the tides for the heels. But only for a little while. The overwhelming might of the faces was too great to bare and even Anastasia escaped. Luckily she and Melissa were able to double team Dasha. This led to the smallest of an otherwise towering team of Hotties to be isolated. COACH Smart thinking, isolate the weakest of the group. Sugar knows how to lead a team. RENEE Sugar's just playing with her hair. That she is. But her partners work over Dasha bit by bit with even Amberlyn getting in on the action. But when Melissa tried for a Hell on Heels bicycle kick, Dasha rolled beneath and made the tag to December. Just as December entered, Sugar got the tag! RENEE Two big tags! Hottie mayhem was the order of the day with all ten babes going at each other! Amberlyn made the crucial error of getting caught by Maya who hit her with a Child Star Syndrome (Wasteland)! MAYA Bootytime! “YYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” ANNAGRET Blond bootytime~! “YYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Annagret slapped Maya on the butt and The Fuckslut From Hell hit the moonsault! Chaos continued to rule as Maggie and Dasha duked it out on the outside, and Annagret went after Anastasia. Maya gave her hand, until she was peeled off by Melissa. Luckily Megan was there to aid her charges in Sunrise. RENEE Coach, look, look! Sugar has the women's title! The Dirtiest Hottie in the Game, snuck into the ring and walloped December in the back of the head! December collapsed to the canvas and was pinned by Sugar for the loss! Winner: Sugar Flair, via pinfall! Sugar went rushing away from the scene of her crime, trailed by debris and jeers. Once safely at the entrance ramp, she showcased her title and promised more of the same would meet December at SluttyMania. FADE OUT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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