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OAOAST TMW: A comedy/erotic e-fed

Anglepalooza 2015 aka a labor of pain and love and boners


Chanel #99

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TV M
L, V, N, SSC


PRESENTED IN OAOASTHD & OAOAST3D

* DUN DUN DUN DUNNA, DUN DUN DUNNA *

 

Across a river, over a bunch of mountains, through fields, sweeping past trees and bushes, hovering over the skyline of New York City, the OAOAST logo flies through the air...before sweeping down, brushing past an elderly man who seems understandably shocked to see six over-sized letters fly past him. The logo continues going, nearing a house...which luckily, a woman is leaving, meaning the logo can sweep through the open door, continuing on down the hallfway and into the living room where a young kid is sat on his computer. It sweeps past him, hitting the computer...which explodes with a flash, lighting up much to the kid's shock and delight.

oao2.jpg

THE OAOAST... WHAT THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD IS READING~!

 

Production fucked up and the opening to the show winds up being some bloopers from 3's Company. Great show, great show.

 

BOOM!

BOOM!

BOOM!

BOOOOOOOOOOOM~!

 

After the ballyhoo and fanfare the show opens with Sunshine Yukino stood in the ring!

 

YUKINO

It Anglepalooza 2-kaay-fifteen!

 

"YYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

 

YUKINO

And this Lethal Bang, sponsored by Sunrise!

 

tumblr_nj7ugnFGF61rkiw19o1_1280.png

 

”YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!”

 

YUKINO

You cum, you eliminated! You last to cum, you win. You win, you face women champ at Sluttymania One live from Dubai!

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

We pan around to see Sugar Flair and Sara Jean Underwood at the announce desk!

 

tumblr_niy1zyfYe61rkiw19o1_1280.jpg

 

 

tumblr_niy232rAZD1rkiw19o1_1280.jpg

 

SARA JEAN

Welcome to Anglepalooza 2k15! And this is the first ever Lethal Bang! Exciting isn't it, Sugar?

 

SUGAR

Only if December don't win and don't get pregnant. I don't want another one of her coming to get me in eighteen years.

 

With a wide shot we see those members of the OAOAST roster who aren't in the Lethal Rumble. No they have the better duty of fucking any Hottie they want. Such lucky boys are Jo-Jo Whoa, Quentin Benjamin, Carl MacDonald, Northstar, Vinny Valentine, Flynn Stevens, and many more!

 

BUFFER

And now the Hotties who will contend in the LETHAL BANG!

 

Wanna lick get a taste of the dip, in my kitty box
Wanna play for a day dad-dy? In my kitty box
Wanna lick get a taste of the dip, in my kitty box
Wanna play for a day dad-dy? In my kitty box
(My kitty box, my kitty box, my kitty box, my kitty box)

 

Picture Maya masturbatin in a drop
Picture Maya tan and topless on a yacht
Picture Maya suckin on you like some candy
Picture Maya in your shirt and no panties
Shirt and no panties... [moaning]
Picture Maya in the pool skinnydippin
Picture Maya in the 69 position
Picture Maya dancin on a stripper pole
Picture Maya in a Playboy centerfold
Playboy centerfold, Playboy centerfold
Playboy centerfold, Playboy centerfold

 

Maya whirls out first, flaunting her massive Duncan mellons to the lusting audience.

 

BUFFER

From Los Angeles, California, "THE FUCKSLUT FROM HELL" MAYA DUNCAN-BLANCHARD!

 

“YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

SARA JEAN

Maya is so oversexed she might just cum at the thought of this match.

 

SUGAR

Fine by me.

 

This is the end
Hold your breath and count to ten
Feel the earth move and then
Hear my heart burst again
For this is the end
I've drowned and dreamt this moment
So overdue I owe them
Swept away, I'm stolen
 
Let the sky fall
When it crumbles
We will stand tall
Face it all together
Let the sky fall

When it crumbles
We will stand tall
Face it all together
At skyfall
That skyfall

 

BUFFER

From Edmonton, Alberta Canada...."THE SHOWGIRL" MOLLY NERRRDDDLY!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

More conservative than Maya, Molly waves and smiles to her future studs.

 

SUGAR

She ain't winning. Look in her eyes. Raw lust I tells ya!

 

I used to have two girlfriends,
now I got none.
Cause my number two girl
found out about one.
Two girl friends,
now I got none.
Cause my number two girl
found out about

 

BUFFER

From Big Bear, California....BUSTY ROSE!

 

“BBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

Busty sizes up the guys, and finds all them wanting compared to BPT.

 

SARA JEAN

We'll also see Holly and Malaysia in this. But we won't see Ohlala. Gotta keep things friendly!

 

Come on, let me ride your bicycle
It's so fantastical on your bicycle
We can get a little more physical
Baby, after all, it's only natural
I feel it coming, coming, coming, oh
I feel it running, running, running, oh
Come on, let me ride your bicycle
It's so fantastical on your bicycle

 

BUFFER

From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada....MALAYSIA NERDLY!

 

Malaysia comes out cracking a brand new whip which ha more than a few of the men fearing for their lives.

 

SARA JEAN

And there she is!

 

SUGAR

You must be psychic.

 

SARA JEAN

Or I have the order of entry in front of me.

 

Baby, I'll learn to touch you
I wanna breathe into your well
See, I gotta to hunt you
I gotta to bring you to my hell
Baby, I wanna fuck you,
I WANNA FEEL YOU IN MY BONES
Boy, I'm gonna love YOU
I'M GONNA TEAR INTO YOUR SOUL


DESIRE, I'm hungry
I hope you feed me
how do you want me, how do you want me?
how do you want me, how do you want me?
how do you want me, how do you want me?
how do you want me, how do you want me?

 

BUFFER

From Voltera, Italy “THE VOLTERA VIXEN” GLOSS ANGIEACOLA!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Skipping out from backstage, Gloss likes what she sees in her choice of lovers. Of course she isn't known to be picky.

 

SARA JEAN

Here's Gloss, who says she's invented gangbangs, throat fucking and anal beads. And was a writer for Family Matters for season 3.

 

I AIN'T GOT NO MOTHERFUCKING FRIENDS

 

BUFFER

From Las Vegas Neavad, “THE ANGEL OF DEATH” HOLLY!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

The combat boots carry a cursing and yelling Holly to the ring.

 

SUGAR

She ain't have nothing to nice say about these guys, did she?

 

The voice of the empire, the scene is on fire
Pull the plugs higher, I spit fire
Trance of the empire strangle my desire
Pull the plugs higher, and I'll spit fire

I'm borderline happy, and I'm borderline sad
I'm borderline good and I'm borderline bad
And I can't get rid of this singing fear
You saw me out and my head gets clear
I live my life in shackles, but I'm borderline free
I used to be blind and I still can't see
In a round and round till you change your mind
As long as nobody breaks my sight

 

BUFFER

From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, “THE MAPLE LEAF CUTIE” MORGAN NERDLY!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Smirking, the tiniest Nerdly counts the number of guys she's panning to get off tonight.

 

SARA JEAN

Morgan leans towards girls, so I'm guessing she'd have an advantage in not cumming tonight. And just so everyone knows, Pierette was supposed to be in this match, but after shoving Morgan off the interview stage she's taken a hit to the purse and got a two week suspension.

 

I can't take it
From the day I saw
My heart start breaking
No one saved me
I can't take it
Can't believe I went and
Lost you baby
Earth keeps shaking
All around
Oh, you let me down
And I can't take it
From the day I saw
My heart start breaking
No one saved me

 

BUFFER

From Kiev, Ukraine....DASHA YUSCHENKO!

 

“YYEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

As happy as can be, Dasha trots to the ring!

 

SUGAR

Boo!

 

I tried to find you at the bottom of a bottle
Laying down on the bathroom floor
My loneliness was a rattle in the windows
You said you don't want me anymore

And you left me
Standing on a corner crying,
Feeling like a fool for trying
I don't even remember
Why I'm wasting all these tears on you
I wish I could erase our memory
Cause you didn't give a damn about me
Oh, finally I'm through
Wasting all these tears on you
These tears on you

 

BUFFER

From Nashville, Tennessee by way of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada....”CANADIAN COUNTRY” MELISSA NERDLY!

 

Less confident than usual, Melissa keeps her distance from all the guys when she reaches ring.

 

SUGAR'

WHOOOO~! There's my pick! Go Melissa!

 

I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream
I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam
And I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem
But if I know you, I know what you'll do
You'll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream

 

BUFFER

From Yaroslav, Russia...”TENDER AT HEART” ANASTASIA VIOLETTA!

 

“BBBOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

SUGAR

My other pick!

 

SARA JEAN

Only one can Hottie can win.

 

SUGAR

I do what I want!

 

I was reminiscing just the other day,
While having coffee all alone and Lord, it took me away.
Back to a first-glance feeling on New York time.
Back when you fit in my poems like a perfect rhyme.
Took off faster than a green light, go,
Hey, skip the conversation when you already know.
I left a note on the door with a joke we’d made,
And that was the first day.

And darling, it was good never looking down.
And right there where we stood was holy ground.

 

 

BUFFER

From Lovelock, Nevada, “THE SPICE OF LIFE” CINNAMON SPOONS!
 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Despite all that's happened to her recently, Cinnamon keeps her head held high and smiles for her fans.

 

SARA JEAN

A feel good pick right along with Annagret, huh, Sugar?

 

SUGAR

I feel like I gotta puke!

 

Children grow and women producing
Men go working
Some go stealing
Everyone's got to make a living

 

BUFFER

From Los Angeles, California...”LITTLE MISS CALIFORNIA” JADE RODEZ-DUNCAN!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Jade hits ringside and gives her sister a low five. Why low? I dunno.

 

Underneath the starlight - starlight
There's a magical feeling - so right
It'll steal your heart tonight

You can try to resist
Try to hide from my kiss
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
Deep in the dark
You'll surrender your heart
But you know
But you know that you can't fight the moonlight
No, you can't fight it
It's gonna get to your heart

 

BUFFER

From Knoxville, Tennessee....”THE BITTER BEAUTY” DECEMBER BELLE!

 

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

December is half asleep when she walks out, but wakes up with the roaring of the New York crowd and the sight of so many potential lovers.

 

SARA JEAN

I hope you upped your bounty.

 

SUGAR

I did. One hundred dollars and a voucher to see Selma!

 

SARA JEAN

The late Martin Luther King must be so proud of you, Suge.

God cannot save my soul
It's straight to hell for me, I know
And when I get there,
At least I've found a place to call my home

 

BUFFER

From Edmonton, Albeta, Canada “THE DEATH VIEL CUTIE” MAGGIE NERDLY!

 

“BBBOOOOOOOOO!”

 

Maggie swigs down her bottle of wine, possible giving her an advantage tonight.

 

SUGAR

Best friend number two! WHOOOOOO!

 

Her pistol go (bang bang, boom boom, pop pop),
Her pistol go (bang bang, boom boom, pop pop),
I said her pistol go (bang bang, boom boom, pop pop),
Cause she a fashion killa, and I'm a trendy nigga
I said her pistol go (bang bang, boom boom, pop pop),
Her pistol go (bang bang, boom boom, pop pop),
I said her pistol go (bang bang, boom boom, pop pop),
Cause she a fashion killa, and I'm a jiggy nigga

 

BUFFER

From Paris, France....SOPHIE GREEEEY!

 

“YEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Our lord and leader struts to ringside, looking both hot and chic at the same time.

 

SUGAR

Grey ain't no French name. They got names like Parlezpoo.

 

SARA JEAN

What French person do you know named Parlezpoo?

 

I need a hundred black coffins for a hundred bad men
A hundred black graves so I can lay they ass in
I need a hundred black preachers with a black sermon to tell
From a hundred black bibles, while we send them all to hell
I need a hundred black coffins, black coffins, black coffins, oh lord
I need a hundred black coffins, black coffins, oh lord, black coffins
I need a hundred...

 

BUFFER

From Rush, Ireland, “THE DAUGHTER OF DARKNESS” LYRIC DELACEY!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Sexy, graceful and cool Lyric DeLacey strolls to the ring.

 

SARA JEAN

I guess Lyric is a wildcard in this match.

 

Hey, hey
I let you walk all over me, me
You know that I’m a little tease, tease
But I wanna play there please, please

You know you know you know I’m crazy
I just wanna be your baby
You can fuck me and then play me
You love and you can hate me

Miss me, miss me, now you wanna kiss me

Try me because I said so
Struck me within my ego
I’ve been a bad girl, don’t you know?
(Don’t tell me what’s your deal)
Come get it now or never
I’ll let you do whatever
I’ll be your bad girl, bad girl
(1-2-3-4)

 

BUFFER

And finally, from VANHEIM, “THE ANARCHIC ANGEL” ANNAGRET WICKEDBOOORRRRRNNN!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

The flaming sword of surt leads the way for the flaming hot goddess, who is talked out of putting it up Flynn's ass by her sister.

 

BUFFER

Let the Lethal Bang BEGIN!

 

Pierette works her way around the studs, inviting them on by waving her scissors. Not the best way to get a matter, no. At least one red head knows how to get a man and that's Holly, who shoves Eggther in his bare chest, giving him a stare thick with skepticism.

 

HOLLY

I hope you know how to fuck a real woman, silver haired faggot.

 

Eggther may not appreciate being called a silver haired faggot, but what he can appreciate is Holly's perky tits. Small moans spill from Holly's lips as Eggther's fresh shaven face glides across Miss Mann's bosoms.

 

HOLLY

Put your tongue on it, fuckface!

 

Not only does Eggther get the message, but so does Sonic JR. Together in perfect concert the two men roll their tongues across hard nipples that could shred through diamonds. Eggther finds Holly's embarrassment over enjoying this to be a little funny. But he dare not laugh at her if he still wants to sup on these fine tities.

 

SUGAR

Letting a guy named after the worst burger place in the world get you feeling good. Her mama ain't proud.

 

SARA JEAN

What do you have against Sonics?

 

SUGAR

They wouldn't hire me in tenth grade!

 

Every wrestling fan in the world sees Holly getting hot and horny from these two superstars prodding, sucking and chewing on her breasts. These two men she wouldn't give the time of the day to normally. The pleasure is so great she sags against the guardrail and even the fans get in groping Holly.

 

MELISSA

This is modern day Sodom and Gomroh, I feel the tendrils of hell creeping up on me just sitting here. I gotta go!

 

MAYA

And where might you be going?

 

MELISSA

Outta my way, looney tune!

 

MAYA

This is the Lethal Bang and I will not let it be disgraced in such a manner.

 

With a much firmer than expected grip on Melissa's arm, Maya drags her hollering back to the sex party

 

MAYA

See, my Uncle Pierce. He might be retarded and have a dangerously enlarged roid heart. This is what he's been doing this week, imagining that big pole of his in your mouth, making you taste his cum. Yeah, he wants you to milk his balls dry, and then do it again. Isn't that right Pierce?

 

PIERCE

Straight up like my Lil Bro down here. Not that he's little. Right? Right?

 

MAYA

Ehh, not gonna lie so just not gonna answer. Get ready to experience the mega awesome cocksucking skills of Melissa Nerdly!

 

Down goes Melissa, forced to her knees by this tormenting teenage girl. These strong hands of Maya pry open Melissa's sexy lips and then force them around Pierce's throbbing cock.

 

MELISSA

MMMMFFF!

 

Melissa tries to swallow the thick soupy saliva mixed with Pierce's precum, but its all blocked by his shaft. Giving up this blowjob, she tries to get away, yet Maya's grip is ever firm and she refuses to let Melissa do anything but suck Pierce's cock.

 

MAYA

Suck his dick, Melissa. I'm not letting you go until you suck his dick.

 

Maya pushes forward on Melissa's head forcing her to take Pierce's once again, eliciting a strong gag from the country singer. She struggles against the power and strength of the dick, but with nowhere to run she has to relax her throat muscles and take it. Her beautiful chest is dripping with own saliva, which Maya helpfully licks off. More lucky for Melissa is that she's able to push the cock to her cheeks, relaxing her throat and giving a hot bulge.

 

tumblr_nihd51zJvA1rkiw19o1_1280.png

 

SARA JEAN

Now she's getting the hang of this.

 

Busty lays in the ring with Rayder's tonuge feeling its way around her pussy. Perhaps not as good as BPT, but still good enough to push raw groans from Busty's juicy lips. The Big Bear native puts her long legs onto Rayde's broad shoulders, giving her great leverage to push her horny cunt against him. Even the feel of his beard tickling her sends her into overdrive.

 

SUGAR

She's gonna burst! One down!

 

Not quite as Busty settles into a groaning rhythm, withstanding the urge to cum.

 

SARA JEAN

Kind of overeager there, Sugar, are you afraid to face Busty at Sluttymania?

 

SUGAR

Afraid? Flair's don't know the meaning of the word!

 

Cinnamon is straddling the dick of mega stud Jo-Jo Whoa!

 

 

CINNAMON

Yes! Slam my vagina with your whoa inducing rod of might! Slam!

 

Jo-Jo has no idea what Cinnamon's going on about, but he bucks his hips upward. Its a powerful motion that sends his cock deep into Cinnamon's pussy, reaching all the way to her womb. When it hits her stomach, Cinnamon lets out a wild scream. Wild enough that the officials on hand have to check and see if she came. But she assures them she hasn't and continues heaving her soaking cunt onto JJ's hard member.

 

SUGAR

This ain't no honor system! She came I saw her with my own two, I did.

 

Holly pussy is being filled by Sonic JR! And for such a little man he has massive stroke, mounting Holly from behind and drilling her with deep, strong precision. Juices oozes out of Holly's cunt, each time he pulls out, and huge squishing sound is heard when he plows back in!

 

REFEREE

Are you cumming Holly?

 

HOLLY

Like fuck I am!

 

But that's a lie. For Holly's body shudders and her pussy trembles and her mouth opens to let out a stream of vulgarities, all part of the orgasm Sonic JR gives her!

 

REFEREE

That's it, Holly, you came!

 

HOLLY

No! No! Fuck no!

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Holly

Eliminated: 1st

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

Ha! Talk tough and get eliminated first! Ha!

 

 

 

Holly is irate, throwing a massive fit, unable to fathom how she got eliminated FIRST.

 

SARA JEAN

That knocks Holly out the running. She can cry in BPT's arms if she wants.

 

Next to Busty, Morgan is being drilled by Brain Travis Kidd. Her legs are high up in the air, kicked back to allow his dick to fully penetrate her cunt. And penetrate it does, filling the tight hole, hitting the walls and spilling his precum into her horny little hole. Its so tight, he could force himself out if he came in her

 

 

MORGAN

You're a pretty good fuck, Brian. Let's meet up after this, you can bring Oscar along, then it'll be a party.

 

Brian likes the sound of that, and it causes him to speed up his fucking of Morgan. Her tiny body shakes and bounces on the ground, so greatly rocked by this banging. BTK can hold back no longer and spits his cum into the deepest reaches of her sex!

 

MORGAN

Yes! So much cum in me!

 

BTK has to pull out and take a break, but Morgan doesn't go lonely as James Riggs step in!

 

RIGGS

Let me take a turn with her.

 

Taking her mind off Ice Quiz eating her asshole, Maya remembers Melissa.

 

MAYA

Someone DP her!

 

MELISSA

DP, what's that mean?

 

MAYA

One in the pussy, one in the booty!

 

MELISSA

Heckie no! Are you crazy?!

 

Maya waves over the unusual pairing of Mathis Golden and to join Piercey D!

 

MAYA

I want bodybuilding.com in her ass.

 

MELISSA

No! Not in there! Maya, you better stop them!

 

Mathis Golden does as told, his long thick cock isn't used gently to push through Melissa's asshole.

 

MELISSA

It's too dang, big! Tell him to get it out, Maya!

 

MAYA

Just a little more.

 

MELISSA

No! No more!

 

Mathis grits his teeth and sinks his fuck rod into Melissa's asshole, stretching out her rectum with one painful scream inducing fuck.

 

MELISSA

Maya! Get him out of my asshole! Get him out, please! I'll do anything you want!

 

MAYA

Tell me if Uncle Pierce cums baby oil.

 

Pierce sinks his schlong into Melissa's pussy, finding no trouble in getting it past her glistening outer lips.

 

MAYA

Oooh, that went in there so easily. Methinks the lady likes it.

 

MELISSA

The lady sure don't!

 

MAYA

Fuck her brains out, guys.

 

Pierce lets his cock find a place in her aching channel, plowing through her cervix. And Melissa can fill every millimeter of Golden's gigantic dick filling her virgin tunnel. Her whole body jerks, her bottom lover showing no respect for the fact she's never taken it in the ass before.

 

MELISSA

God save me! Stop, stop, please make them stop, Maya! I can't take it!

 

MAYA

Harder! Fuck her harder!

 

Melissa tries to fight out, but Pierce's muscles are like a rod, his penis a hand keeping him in place. Golden's dick is like a light post being rammed endlessly and brutally into her freshly popped asshole.

 

MELISSA

Oh no, I can feel em touching! That ain't right! That ain't right!

 

tumblr_nihv2pyuaV1rkiw19o1_1280.png

 

Melissa's brain is almost shorting out thanks to a wild heat building upinside her. The steady rhythm of Pierce's cock, and the harsh hammering off her asshole, with each cock hitting one another is nothing she ever before dreamed of. It almost feels like these dicks could tear through her very body at any second. She feels like half her body is full of cock and soon its full of their hot sticky semen. The white goo fills her pussy, then overloads her asshole, and its that feeling of two rivers of cum filling two holes that causes her to cum hard!

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Melissa

Eliminated: 2nd

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

That was my pick! We were gonna bring the house down at Sluttymania!

 

SARA JEAN

I always heard a Flair could have a great match with a broomstick.

 

Molly is sucking on Carl's dick as if her life depended on it. It doesn't, but she's still gobbling that dick with gusto. Its too hard for her to deep throat, but she tries her damndest. Gagging, goughing and wheezing by damned Molly needs to swallow this dick. She's rewarded by Carl's tongue taking hurried swipes at her pussy. Up and down they go, icing on the cake for Molly, the cake being this beefy cock in her mouth...

 

tumblr_nihznzpTUa1rkiw19o1_1280.png

 

MOLLY

Take me, baron of industry!

 

Carl has no need to be told twice! He flips Molly onto her knees and sinks his eager member past the folds of her pussy. Molly lets out a strong yell, so pleased to take the piston inside her vagina. The two milky white lovers begin an earnest and passionate fucking, Carl wanting to fill Molly's tender vagina with his milky seed.

 

 

MOLLY

Serve me a milkshake, burger man!

 

Carl gives Molly just what she wants, unleashing his seed inside her. And Molly gives him what she wants cumming around his dick and his explusion of cum!

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Molly Nerdly

Eliminated: 3rd

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

Ain't no surprise there as far I reckon.

 

December is stretched out, holding onto the ropes and getting it in long steady strokes from Ser Timothy Cash! Each one is designed to give December maximum pleasure because that's just the kind of good lover Timothy is.

 

tumblr_nim08qtYlE1rkiw19o1_1280.png

 

DECEMBER

Very great, Timmy! I'll give you a bonus chapter in my dickipedia!

 

SUGAR

Never mind her stupid, dickipedia, make her cum!

 

As Cash wants this to be as pleasurable as possible, he isn't focused on making December cum, just giving her pussy the kind of passionate fucking it deserves.

 

SER TIMOTHY

I hope you're enjoying this, milady.

 

DECEMBER

Darling, aren't you sweet?

 

SUGAR

:angry:

 

A rippling muscle man, painted green emerges through the crowd! His pecs glisten in the light, his arm are cut out of solid granite.

 

SARA JEAN

Look Sugar, its Felix Phillips! From NRG!

 

SUGAR

I got an NRG candy bar from Elementary school, you think I should eat it when I get back home.

 

SARA JEAN

Only if you want to die slowly.

 

 

FLEX

FELX FUCK!

 

The giant bodyguilder is ready to fuck with a huge dick standing at full attention and also painted green!

 

ANASTASIA

What is your problem?

 

FLEX

FLEX FUCK!

 

Anastasia hass seen the cocks on the horses at the family farm in Russia when she was growing up, and this was pretty much as big if not bigger! Her hand touchs the rock hard phallus

 

ANASTASIA

It feels like its on fire!

 

Anastasia can't resit lowering to her knees and and putting her mouth on the massive cock.

She runs her soft lips up the underside of his shaft, such length and such texture amazes her.She takes both of her hands and starts to stroke his hard cock up and down as she puts her mouth on the tip.

 

FLEX

WOMAN SUCK!

 

Anastasia can hardly fit half of Flex's cock within her mouth no matter how wide she opens. This frustrates her, but she still succeeds in at least getting half of it inside her. It fills her mouth almost comically, there's no room within her the confines of her mouth as its filled by this huge green dick!

 

SUGAR

Anastasia you better not let this green goblin make you cum!

 

Suddenly Anastasia's mouth is full of hot sticky cum, it shoots through her like a garden hose. So much is dumped down her throat, she feels the fullness in her belly. Soon white jizz runs out her mouth and down her chin. Giant Flex pulls out and spews more of his thick ropey cum onto her knockers, delight8ihng Anastasia.

 

SUGAR

She didn't cum, not yet Sugar, she's still in it.

 

SUGAR

She better be in it till the end or I'll kick her shins!

 

Across from Anastasia, Malaysia is on her knees and wraps AC's member in a bear hug, squeezing his cock between her full tits and thick biceps!

 

SARA JEAN

Hey, that's unique!

 

AC

And painful!

 

The Canadian muscle babe gets more grunting and whimpering from AC as he leans his head back, his seven inch cock pulsing powerful from the sensation. After marveling at the look of pain on AC's face, Malaysia uses her biceps to roughly jerk his cock off, sending brutal yet wonderful sensations through his leaking rod.

 

SARA JEAN

Anastasia's still dealing with The Incredible Flex. Lucky her!

 

Anastasia bends over, stretching her upperbody in the guard rail so all the front row fans can see the look of burning lust on her face. They watch her mouth open, part on pleasure part in pain from Flex starting to push his cock into her love hole. It feels like a lead pipe is entering, deeper and deeper never ending.

 

ANASTASIA

Holy shit!

 

Flex's giant balls slap against her clit making her even more horny than before!

 

ANASTASIA

OH MY GOD, YES, FLEX! FUCK ME! FUCK ME YOU DIRTY BEAST!!!

 

SUGAR

I wouldn't want nothing to do with a guy who's green unless he's Raphael.

 

SARA JEAN

I won't ask you to elabroate.

 

Flex's face contorts in a wild passion as he fucks this Russian woman like they were both animals.

She slides up and down on his cock like a ragdoll as he starts to lift her up and onto his monstrous tool. He holds her by her slender waist now and use her entire body as though she were a flesh light or some other masturbator.

 

ANASTASIA

USE ME YOU GIANT ANIMAL!

 

The massive Flex fucks her silly, her eyes rolling into the back of her head and her tongue hanging out.

 

SUGAR

Oh no, oh no, she's gonna cum! Dang it!

 

Sugar's worse fears are realized and Anastasia cums from Flex's fucking!

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Anastasia Violetta

Eliminated: 4th

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

Gaawwwwwrdddd! I can't stand it! If December wins I'm blowing this place sky high!

 

SARA JEAN

I think the blowing is being taken care of by Annagret and Maya, Sugar.

 

Sara Jean is spot on the money or money shot as VICE finds their cocks inside the mouthes of Sunrise's crown jewels.

 

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As we can see Annagret uses this coveted black cock to stretch out her cheek, pushing it out as far as it can go. And all the while her tongue rolls around the shaft, Annagret using it to trace each and every vein. Right next to her is BFF Maya chugging on Bosley's ball sack. She sucks them so hard that her vaccuum like state is a little painful for The Bos. But the girl is a wild woman on his nuts and even when she bites into them its too hot to complain.

 

SUGAR

These two are pros! This junk is rigged, I want my money back.

 

SARA JEAN

You didn't pay any money.

 

SUGAR

Alix said I had to give her six dollars to sit here. That was my snack money!

 

The Duncan fun continues with Jade taking a ride on Jack Wendy's cock. Wendy may stupid as a sack of pebbles but he has enough sense to appreciate Jade's juicy pussy working its way up and down his now shining rod. Luckily Jack has the size himself to handle Jade's weight crashing down on him with her enthusiastic riding.

 

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JADE

This is so great, Jack! Next time lets soak your penis in a frosty!

 

SARA JEAN

That would be very uncomfortable,

 

SUGAR

Who cares, that boy's a few fries short of a happy meal, I bet he'd dip his pecker in molten lava if ya asked him nicely.

 

On the French announce desk, Busty is riding Charlie Moss' dick in a steady rhythm. Her namesakes bounce along with her, screaming up when she rises and lowering in a hefty boom when she sinks.

 

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“MAKE HER CUM! MAKE HER CUM! MAKE HER CUM!” the audience orders Charlie!

 

MOSS

Lord forgive me for please for the sinful act I am committing. This act of sex before marriage. I beg your forgiveness, lord, I beg for it.

 

Wouldn't you know, but Moss' little speech to the lord turns Busty on quite a bit. In fact it send her into horny overdrive and her body rocks with an orgasm!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Busty Rose

Eliminated: 5th

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

I'm glad I ain't gotta face her.

 

As Busty is escorted to the back, she passes by Gloss Angieacola giving one of her award winning blowjobs to Christian Wright! Its not the first time CW has had Gloss work over his schlong, and this time is every bit as awesome as the previous times. Gloss sucks with no hands and no need for taking breaths, sucking on Wright so hard it makes his vision blurry.

 

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SARA JEAN

Sugar, I'd think you wouldn't wanna face Gloss either.

 

SUGAR

No vampers!

 

Sophie asshole is being filled with the immense cock of Pierce. Not minding the discomfort, Sophie bounces her ass up on his well soaked rod. She's getting the spit of Melissa and the country starlet's juices from earlier mixed within her asshole which is all the hotter.

 

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Riggs stands behind Sophie, smacking her ass which makes the cock painfully bounce around in her bowels.

 

SOPHIE

Ooh! Ooh! Oui! Oui! Smack my ass!

 

SUGAR

I don't trust Sophie, if she wins she's gonna make me get screwed out my title.

 

SARA JEAN

You've got the paranoia of a chronic pot smoker, Sugar.

 

December is experiencing the true meaning of a lethal bang with Studderboxx's cock crammed down her throat and Snot's chubby member spelunking in her asshole. December does her best to navigate the situation, grunting down on Studd's penis when Snot's rod rams the tenderest part of her asshole.

 

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SUGAR

Make her cum! Get her out of here!

 

SARA JEAN

December is holding extra double tough!

 

The gangbanging continues on Maggie Nerdly, impaled in every hole. Ice Quiz pounds his cock into her mouth, driving it all the way to the top of her throat. Maggie moans around it, feeling so stuffed with also having a mustache ride in her pussy from Rico and Fenrir stretching out her asshole.

 

SARA JEAN

I wonder how much little Maggie can take?

 

SUGAR

Who you calling little?

 

SARA JEAN

Not you for once!

 

Fenrir pumps his cock deeper and deeper into Maggie's asshole, while Rico performs the same act inside her pussy. Both men go in fast and hard, combining with Ice Quiz to give Maggie a furious triple penetration. The feel of having so much cock within her causes Maggie to explode with orgasm!

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Maggie Nerdly

Eliminated: 6th

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

Best friend number two! No!

 

SARA JEAN

I thought I was best friend number two.

 

SUGAR

:o

You wanna be my friend?!

 

SARA JEAN

Just kidding, I don't.

 

Every sensation in Joey The Rat's body disappears besides the feeling in his dick which is penetrating Lyric DeLacey. Warmth, wetness and softness are the feelings Joey feels, such is the greatness of this 500 year old vampire pussy. Much to Lyric's amazement, Joey's penis is radiant within her. She feels the rigidity and fullness within her, each stroke felling like the penis is about to spew its white goo within her. The rod throbs and pulses deep within her and her body does the same.

 

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LYRIC

Yes, yes! Big strokes from your big rodent cock, little man!

 

SARA JEAN

I'll bet ten dollars she's the best looking woman Joey's ever gotten with.

 

SUGAR

I'll take that bet.

 

SARA JEAN

You'd lose.

 

SUGAR

I got a gambling problem.

 

Morgan is teasing the crowd and Jo-Jo a bit, acting indecisive on what she should do with his aching penis.

 

“SUCK HIS COCK! SUCK HIS COCK! SUCK HIS COCK!” they urge.

 

MORGAN

Hey, I'm not one to disappoint.

 

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Inside the ring, Jade builds up a steady rhythm on Carl MacDonald's cock. Not as big as Jack, Carl's body strains somewhat underneath the heaving of Jade's weight. But the pussy is so tight and so weight that any minor discomfort is well worth it!

 

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JADE

Old McDonald! Old McDonald fuck me like a farm animal!

 

Carl bucks his hips high and hard, maybe not farm animal style but still good enough and with enough force to have Jade start creaming herself. The feel of her rush of pussy juice is enough to cause Carl to spray his own juice within her, both these food lovers making a tasty desert in her pussy!

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Jade Rodez-DUncan

Eliminated: 7th

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

Say goodbye, Miss Piggy!

 

SARA JEAN

Wow, clever, Sugar.

 

SUGAR

Thanks!

 

SARA JEAN

I was being sar...nevermind.

 

Its the twin terrors of MARV and MEL who have plastered their cocks in Sophie. The French Girl bobs her head on MARV's pecker, spurred along by the bouncing of her body with MEL taking her from behind.

 

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SARA JEAN

Double your pleasure, double your Nerdly!

 

Sophie moans around MEL's meaty shaft, which constantly hits the roof of her mouth before settling to go back towards her throat. For slacker stoner's the two know how to fuck her right, timing their thrust together to give her horny fuck holes maximum pleasure.

 

MEL

Dude, she's gonna cum, soon!

 

MARV

We're gonna win!

 

SUGAR

These dopes ain't even competing!

 

Sophie yells out her orgasm around MEL's cock, sending wild vibrations to the fuck stick. Desperate to taste their river of sperm before she has to leave, Sophie pulls them out her body and into her hands.

 

SUGAR

She's cheating like I said she would!

 

The OAOAST boss makes a frantic jerking of the twin's dicks and needs only a few strokes to have their cum splash across her gorgeous face.

 

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“SOPHIE! SOPHIE! SOPHIE!”

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In the midst of this giant gangbang, another fan leaps the rail!

 

SARA JEAN

Mikey would probably call this pandemonium.

 

SUGAR

Panda who now?

 

The fan is a burly man, bigger than even a few OAOAST grapplers He grabs Yukino by the arms, which doesn't seem odd to anyone.

 

YUKINO

Who you? What you want?

Still holding Yukino with one arm, the man uses his free hand to remove his pants and expose engorged erection.

 

YUKINO

I not in match. You find someone else. I respectable lady.

 

The big man doesn't leave the “respectable lady” much choice in the matter as he pushes her onto her knees.

 

YUKINO

Oh! You bad man! I tell you I respectable lady! You no do this! You go now!

 

The man doesn't go anywhere and instead forces his cock within Yukino's pussy!

 

YUKINO

Ah! Ah! Penis too big for me, you split me open!

 

 

YUKINO

I respectable lady! You stop this now!

 

 

YUKINO

Bad man treat good woman like ragdoll! Stop! It very shameful!

 

The action continues to be hot, horny and heavy and no one is getting it hotter, hornier and heavier than Cinnamon. The big fat prick of Jormungandr scrapes the roof of her mouth, tickling her the same awesome way her tongue tickles its underside. Even better is the way Cinnamon gropes his testicle. Just one of these enormous balls are two big for her delicate hand. Not so delicate is Eggther, who gets his balls groped by her while he lets his dick smack her in the face!

 

 

CINNAMON

Jeepers how big can balls be?

 

Next to Cinnamon is Ice Quiz, the hip hop head ramming his dick into Dasha's ass with rapid fire thursts. Each hit from his big body and big dick jerks Dasha forward, but her rectum clenches tight to IQ's member.

 

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DASHA

Oh yes big hip hop white man you make Dasha feel so excellent tonight!

 

SUGAR

She's done get her out of here!

 

SARA JEAN

Your blood pressure is crazy high I bet.

 

Outside of the ring the fans get a beautiful view of True Blood Sisters riding PDB's cocks. Gloss bounces her curvy body on Piercey D, while Morgan matches her speed on Riggs despite her teeny tiny size.

 

 

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MORGAN

You like this, huh, boys? Me and my cum dumpster buddy riding your dicks?

 

GLOSS

Ah,ah, ah! I'm such a dirty bitch! Ah, ah, ah! Fuck me like a dirty bitch!

 

Elsewhere a situation is developing when Malaysia suddenly whips Brian Travis Kidd!

 

BTK

Ow! Malaysia, what's the deal?!

 

 

CRRAAAAAAACK!

 

MALAYSIA

I heard you're a fan of Bobbi Cheesecake. Purple Wig WHORE!

 

BTK

Everyone liiii....

 

Brian trails off when he realizes that finishing that sentence is a bad idea!

 

MALAYSIA

Say it! Say you like that worthless whore! Tell me you like her!

 

BTK

Calm down, calm down.

 

Malaysia is threatening to attack Brian again, and is only kept from it by security.

 

YUKINO

No attack men! This not that kind of bar! You gone now.

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Malaysia Nerdly

Eliminated: 9th

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

MALAYSIA

(walking off)

I'll get you! And that Purple Wig WHORE Cheesecake!

 

SUGAR

PHEWWWWWW! I'M SAVED!

 

SARA JEAN

Yeah but girls like Annagret, and Maya are still in.

 

SUGAR

PHEW! I'M HALFWAY SAVED!

 

Eggther can hold back his seed no longer and sprays it forth. Its such a giant load that it gets on Maya as well!

 

MAYA

I want that cum! I want it, I want it, I want it!

 

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“MAYA! MAYA! MAYA!”

 

Annagret is driving her juicy cooch onto Lucius Soul's stiff black cock. She slams with her typical fiery horniness so thrilled to have another black cock at her disposal. Soul for his part has to keep himself from blowing his load. This is by far the best pussy he's ever had.

 

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ANNAGRET

I love that big black cock in me, daddy!

 

SARA JEAN

Annagret's probably gonna cum at this rate.

 

SUGAR

Shoulda hooked up with an Asian guy. They're fugly!

 

SARA JEAN

Ah! The views of Sugar don't reflect the views of anyone else. Honest!

 

In the center of the ring, Big IQ have joined forces to give Dasha the Shanghai-la of sexual bliss. Ice Quiz hits the deepest reaches of her snatch, his balls slapping against her entrance while Wright forces his cock in and out of her so-tight rectum. Little Dasha is basically two cocks splitting her apart, and it is one seriously badass feeling!

 

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DASHA

Eeee my pussy takes no more! I am doing the cumming now! Now! Now! Yes! The cumming!

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Dasha Yuschenko

Eliminated: 10th

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

Ha! Hit the road, Stinky Shorts! And take December with ya!

 

Right after Dasha cums we hear this...

 

 

LYRIC

God damn it, Slime, you filthy bloke, you made me cum!

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Lyric DeLacey

Eliminated: 111h

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SUGAR

What are these tools waiting for? Get December to cum!

 

Sugar might be in luck as December is hung upside with her head over the apron. The needy cock of Brian Travis Kidd pushes through her thick lips entering the warm wet heaven of her mouth.

 

SUGAR

Yes! Finish her off!

 

December sucks in on her cheeks with all her strength and BTK's cock is left in a pressure cooker. BTK begins fucking her gently, and is speed is spurred on her by her stroking his meat missile.

 

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“THROAT FUCK! THROAT FUCK! THROAT FUCK!”

 

December's heated moans and the loud squishing noises from the fucking take their toll on BTK's patience. Abandoning southern gentlemen standards, he begins fucking December with a wolf like abandon.

 

SUGAR

Yeah! Yeah! Make her cum!

 

With all restraint gone, BTK fucks her like a jackhammer, pumping in and out as hard as he can.

 

SUGAR

Slam it in her!

 

December lays below him, her face buried in his crotch and holds on as best she can. The Frosted Beauty thrusts up every time he pumps, the fury matching his own. He cums, a great gush of spit and jizz splashing her face and soaking his groin.

 

SUGAR

No! You can't be done! What a gip!

 

Morgan is working magic, astounding magic on Sonic JR's pecker. The little minx rolls her hips up and around, bouncing and stroking that hard dick of his within her pussy. She feels it slide further back then into her willing womb with each move.

 

 

MORGAN

We, the little folk, have to stick together, Sonic. We have to cum together too, understand? You're gonna dump that jizz all in me aren't you?

 

Sonic has been holding back and with that permission he unleashes a torrent of semen into Morgan's cunt, reaching into her stomach. The second Morgan feels the sticky white goo in her, she shouts “FUCKING HELL YEAH, JUNIOR!” and lets herself be rocked by a violent orgasm.

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Morgan Nerdly

Eliminated: 121h

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

MORGAN

That was a lot of cum for a little guy. Call me if you wanna meet up sometime.

 

Morgan strokes Sonic's cheek and off she goes.

 

SARA JEAN

So we have Cinnamon, Annagret, Maya, December, and Gloss left.

 

SUGAR

Can a lightning bolt hit them all please?

 

SARA JEAN

That's Leon's department now.

 

With so few girls around and so many horny guys, there's a convergence on the remaining Hotties! James Riggs and Carl McDonald, and Pierce Duncan find their cocks have welcome homes in Gloss' holes.

 

SUGAR

She's all filled up!

 

Gloss leans her head forward and takes Carl's cock within her talented mouth. She flicks her tongue over the swollen head, then wraps her lips around his girth. His dick is less than half way inside her mouth when he starts shoving it towards her throat. Gloss welcomes this type of rough treatment and eases him in by sliding her tongue underneath her shaft.

 

SARA JEAN

Now that's a gangbang!

 

Gloss swollen clit and hungry pussy is pleasured by Piercey D. His rod works like a battering ram and forces it way through her hole, breaking her walls down, spilling heaps of precum inside her. Riggs is right there with his buddy, his well used cock finding its latest fuck hole in her anus. Her rectum is stretched wide and well by his chubby member. Everytime it seems to be coming back to normal, a hard thrust from Riggs stretches it out all the more...

 

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GLOSS

These dicks are so so yummy! I can't wait to have your cummy in my tummy!

 

The fans near the entrance ramp get a nice little view of Cinnamon being double teamed by Wright and Jo Jo Whoa. Whoa butts his glistening purple head up against her tight little ass hole, rubbing it up and down coating her hole with slippery fluid.

 

CINNAMON

I am Cinnamon! I suck like a vacuum cleaner and do anal like a...thing that does anal!

 

SUGAR

What a loser.

 

Cinnamon lowers her head forward, swallowing Christian's dick in one impressive gulp. She purrs around it, as she now feels the probing sensation of Jo-Jo's dick widening her asshole bit by wonderful bit.

 

CINNAMON

Yes, noble heroes, fuck me in the name of a brighter future!

 

“FUCK HER! FUCK HER! FUCK HER!” the fans near Cinnamon sing.

 

As Cinnamon's asshole expands all the way to accept, Jo-Jo's length she lets out a loud contented sigh of bliss.

 

SARA JEAN

There's a happy girl!

 

GLOSS

Uhhhh this gangbang is super duper fantasticerific!

 

Gloss rocks herself back against the two dicks impaling her pussy and asshole. Despite her giant these two dicks are Gloss' holes gobble up the two fuck sticks, squeezing out little bits of cum from their owner. Her mouth falls around the lengthy shaft of Bosley, who has replaced Carl. Lengthy or no, Gloss inhales this member all the way to the back of her mouth and down her throat. This is so hot that Bosley, cums squirting a helping of cum into her stomach, and that meets with the spewing of cum from The Party Brigade inside her!

 

GLOSS

Human cum! I looooveeeee human cum!

 

Gloss grabs hold of Coulter Doyle and Flynn's dicks and jerks them off just as hard as she can. Which is pretty damn hard! And there splashing of semen is enough to cause Gloss to climax.

 

GLOSS

Clear a path everyone!

 

One fan doesn't clear a pass and Gloss sprays her cum all over him! Gloss makes it up to him, though, by licking the cum off him!

 

“YYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Gloss Angieacola

Eliminated: 13th

Final Four: Annagret, December, Maya,, Cinnamon

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

SARA JEAN

There's your final four, Sugar!

 

SUGAR

I hate em all, but long as December don't win.

 

Inside the ring, Annagret is in black cock heaven as she pounds her pussy against the stiff chocolate dong of CPA. In one hand she jerks and twists the dick of Quentin Benjamin, while her other hand assists her mouth in oozing cum out of Jack Wendy's cock...

 

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“FUCK THEM HARD! FUCK THEM HARD! FUCK THEM HARD!”

 

Definitely listening to this is Jo-Jo and Wright. Wright thrusts upwards with his hips, smashing his cock against Cinnamon's tonsils. While he does that, Jo-Jo whips his dick into overdrive as it assails Cinnamon's hungry asshole. The two men move in a blur, and Cinnamon's body rocks and jumps from the thrusting of their dicks!

 

SARA JEAN

Look at them go, Sugar!

 

Maya wouldn't have fucking go any other way as she makes her rounds about a circle of horny dudes. She jerks and sucks them off in a rapid fire motion, never lingering on one cock, keeping her mouth and hands full of new dicks. Even the fans get their dicks jerked off by the Fuckslut from Hell. In the end Maya winds up with a face drenched in sticky white cum.

 

MAYA

Look at, you guys drenched me like a fucking teenage whore! Someone fuck me with all this cum on my face!

 

Sonic JR takes hold of Maya and sits her on a dick still drenched with Morgan's juices.

 

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MAYA

That's it, baby, fuck your little teenage whore! Cum inside me, 'cause that's what you do for a good whore like me.

 

Sonic does indeed have to cum in Maya, unable to fight against the warm folds of her cunt. When Sonic's done Maya is quickly passed off to Rayder...

 

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MAYA

Give it to me, give me that cum in my eighteen year old pussy, mister! Please, pretty please!

 

Like Sonic before him, Rayder can't help but fall victim to this hot teenage cunt. Pussy dripping with cum, Maya lets Ser Timothy Cash take a hard plunge into her asshole, while Vinny Valentine penetrates her pussy.

 

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MAYA

Oh, I'm taking it! I'm taking these big cocks like a good teenage slut, aren't I, Sara Jean?

 

SARA JEAN

Mommy would be proud!

 

As Tim increases the speed of his thrusting into Maya's asshole, Vinny compliments by hurling upwards to drill her fuckhole. The feeling of having two cocks firing in and out of her is a carnal bliss that doesn't compare. Placing her hands on Vinny's chest, she tosses her head back and delights in the stuffed feeling. And even better is the circle of guys around her jerking off.

 

MAYA

Cum on me! Spray this pretty teenage face with your white hot sperm!

 

SPLAT! SPLAT! SPLAT! SPLAT!

 

MAYA

Oh, I'm cumming! I'm cumming! I'm cumming! I'm fucking cumming with all this hot jizz on me!

 

Maya cums hard and over and over again with the men spilling their seed into her holes and on her face.

 

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~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Maya Duncan-Blanchard

Eliminated: 14th

Final Three: Annagret, December, Cinnamon

~~~~~~~~~~~

SUGAR

She's finished! I don't gotta deal with her! Just someone get December outta here!

 

Ever the good knight, Ser Timothy Cash carries Maya backstage within his arms. He passes by December who's tits are being mauled by Celtic Gothic, who's cheeks are being slapped by the dick of Joey The Rat, who's mouth is being filled by the cock of Ice Quiz, who's hair is being cummed on by referee Charles Robinson(!), and he's pussy is being violently battered by Slime!

 

SUGAR

I bet she came already! How can you see her behind all those guys?

 

December is a grunting, sweaty, aching, sticky mess. She's being used as a total fuck toy for this gang of OAOAST stars, and its all she can to do not to cum. Its so demanded hard not to release an orgasm with Slime digging through her cunt, not to mention the cavalry of dicks abusing her face.

 

SARA JEAN

Major props to December for hanging in there.

 

SUGAR

I thought you were on my side!

 

SARA JEAN

Who told you that?!

 

Elsewhere on the ramp, the fans root on Cinnamon as she continues to be taken in the ass and in the mouth. CW is first to cum, exploding inside her mouth. So much cum fills Cinnamon up that it leaks from her lips and back to Wright's dick. As Cinnamon gulps up the delicious semen, a new batch of cum drenches her bowels thanks to Jo-Jo Whoa shooting his load.

 

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CINNAMON

Oooh I'm cumming! Mine is the cumming of champions! This orgasm is so good its scary!

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Cinnamon Spoons

Eliminated: 15th

Final Two: Annagret, December

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“LET'S GO ANNAGRET!”

“LET'S GO DECEMEBR!”

“LET'S GO ANNAGRET”

“LET'S GO DECEMBER!”

 

SUGAR

I don't wanna face either one! But the principal of it all says I can't face Decemebr. You ain't gonna win, Belle! You ain't gonna win!

 

Felix's cock is easily nine inches long and Annagret is swallowing him whole! She keeps deepthroating the dick until he can't take it anymore. She holds his cock at the base and quickens the pace of stuffing his engorged knob into her throat. While her bowels are stuffed with CPA's giant rod, she holds the tips of his cock between her lips and drains him of sperm.

 

“SWALLOW IT! SWALLOW IT! SWALLOW IT!” The fans wish, and Annagret makes that a command, slurping down his seed.

 

The strong powerful hands of Coulter Doyle are bouncing December up and down his rod, like she were nothing more than a masturbation toy. December needn't do much work in this case, as her pussy and her whole body is being guided by Coulter's hands. Her mouth and tongue on the other hand are hard at work, sucking the skin off Charlie Moss' pecker wood. She swirls around his shaft, all while inhalling and swallowing his fuckmeat. Her hands work with speed holding the base of Charlie's shaft, while also jockying Flynn's dick, oozing bits of cum!

 

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DECEMBER

I didn't chose the slut life, the slut life chose me.

 

SUGAR

Make her cum! Get her off! Do it! Do it!

 

SARA JEAN

Who gets the bounty? There's a lot of guys?

 

SUGAR

Who cares?! Just make her cum!

 

Annagret is getting fucked in a standing sandwhich position by Soul and Wendy, Soul smashing her pussy with poweful thrusts and the muscle bound Wendy spreading her retcum with his meaty vieny shaft. Even as tall and long as she is, Annagret feels an overwhelming fullnless, pierced by these two big black cocks.

 

ANNAGRET

Yes! Give me those big black dicks! I want those black dicks fucking me hard!

 

Over yonder December is still thrust around Coulter's dick like a common sex toy. Her mouth has to take turns on sucking off Snot, Bosley, and Sonic, a full mixture of cum and precum spilling into her tummy. Unfortunately she doesn't have enough hands to jerk off all the guys who want a piece of her beautiful body. She jerks off who she can and lets others rub and beat their dicks against her face.

 

DECEMBER

Oh no, oh no! There's too many dicks for my pussy to handle! I don't wanna cum!

 

SUGAR

You got no choice! Cum! Cum!

 

DECEMBER

My little pussy can't deal with this!

 

SUGAR

Do it! Cum now, you loser!

 

DECEMBER

Mmmm ahhhhh! They all feel way too good! Mmmm ahhhhh!

 

SUGAR

You're cuming! You're gonna lose!

 

ANNAGRET

Uh, hello? Dorks? I came like twenty seconds ago?

 

SUGAR

:no2:

 

~~~~~~~~~~

ELIMINATED

Annagret Wickedborn

Eliminated: 16h

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

~~~~~~~~~~

TEH WINNOR~!

December Belle!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

BUFFER

Your winner of the inaugural LETHAL BANG....DECEMBER BELLE!

 

“YYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

DECEMBER

Sweeter than candy canes! Now I can cum buckets!

 

December cums big time, sending out a geyser of pussy juice, that just has to hit Sugar directly in the eye.

 

SUGAR

AHHHHHH! NOOOOOOOO! NOOOOOOO!

 

Sugar falls to the ground and balls her eyes out, while the OAOAST roster provides the Galaxy and December with a money shot no one will forget.

 

SARA JEAN

She looks like a glazed donut!

 

Soaking with cum, and smiling widely, December has her hand raised by her boss, Sunshine Yukino who's still fucking that same guy...

 

 

SARA JEAN

Congratulations December!

 

LIVE MARCH 8TH

FROM DUBAI

SLUTTYMANIA I

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*** United States Title: Logan Mann vs. Oscar Friberg © ***

Team Scream member Oscar Friberg proved who the true one & only U.S. Champion really was, defeating Logan Mann with an assist from ALEXANDER THE BRUTAL~!

Late in the bout Logan hurled Oscar into the direction of referee Nick Patrick, causing the two to collide, sending Patrick out to the floor in the process. Logan then produced a STEEL CHAIN and was about to K.O. Oscar with a wicked left hook when the arena went dark. When the lights returned the Modern Day Gladiator known as Alexander The Brutal appeared behind Logan to thunderous applause.

LOGAN
:huh::o

Alexander acknowledge his rival with a nod. Initially taken aback Logan responded with a wicked left hook… but Alexander ducked and impaled the cocky superstar with the Sword Of Damocles. The MDG then tossed the referee back in as Oscar finished off Logan with a top rope leg drop for the W.

Winner: Oscar Friberg, via pinfall.

 

***OAOAST World Title: Tyler Bryant Vs Shayne Brave Vs King Landon****

Here's a Tony special: Lorelei turned on Tyler when King Landon had taken out Shayne and was giving Tyler that work. Lorelei called for the bell with Tyler trapped in but not submitting to a guillotine.

 

Winner: King Landon, via pinfall

 

This wasn't planned by Lorelei as evidenced by her anxious expression heading backstage.

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BUFFER

The following is the 2015 LETHAL RUMBLE MATCH! Introducing entry number one...

 

If you could only see the beast you've made of me
I held it in but now it seems you've set it running free
Screaming in the dark, I howl when we're apart
drag my teeth across your chest to taste your beating heart

My fingers claw your skin, try to tear my way in
You are the moon that breaks the night for which I have to howl
My fingers claw your skin, try to tear my way in
You are the moon that breaks the night for which I have to

Howl, howl
Howl, howl

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Time to catch some sun!

 

A silhouette screen guards Tanner Neptune from the view of the roaring fans. But not for long as his jewel studded trident shears through it and the audience explodes with further glee!

 

BUFFER

From Palm Beach, Florida....”THE LORD OF THE TRIDENT” TANNNER NEEPPPTUNNNNE!

 

“YEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COACH

Tough draw, Neptune!

 

COLE

Tanner's got speed and stamina to last to the end though. Its been done before in the OAOAST by Mister Dick.

 

Tanner slides himself into the ring, leaving his trident behind which is fortunate for his foe to say the least. He points to the hard camera and promises victory tonight.

 

BUFFER

And entrant number two....

 

In my hands, I hold the ashes
In my veins, black pitch drums
In my chest, if I can catch this
In my way, the setting sun
Dark clouds gather 'round me
Due northwest, the soul is bound
And I will go on ahead, free
There's a light yet to be found

 

The last pale light in the west
The last pale light in the west

 

COACH

Here's a threat!

 

Eyes shielded by a black cowboy hat, Outlaw Cello makes his move towards the ring. His eyes may be obscured but his frown is not.

 

COLE

Outlaw Cello always ready for a fight and he's got one starting at number two.

 

DING DING DING

 

Cello goes for a homerun right away and launches a Lasso at Tanner! But the youngster runs beneath the ropes and comes back to flatten Cello with a high flipping lariat!

 

COLE

Look at that hair. Tanner should get a spot in the AngleMania mainevent.

 

Tanner picks up Cello thinking of tossing him over the ropes. This doesn't happen as Cello slugs him repeatedly in the stomach. The hot stud stumbles away and his hounded by Cello who unleashes a clubbing forearm on his back. With Tanner weakened, Cello starts choking him on the apron!

 

“ARREST CELLO! ARREST CELLO! ARREST CELLO!”

 

COACH

Snitches.

 

Tanner fights off Cello to end his choking attack. He then tries to upend his foe over the ropes, but Cello easily fights it off. With Tanner stunned, Cello comes forward and blasts him with a yakuza kick to the stomach. Now, Cello feels he can go for the victory. He leads Tanner to the ropes and starts trying to throw him over.

 

COLE

Time for a new entrant!

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

Cello is getting closer and closer to upending Tanner!

 

“SEVEN!”

 

COACH

My bet is on Virgil!

 

COLE

That's a stupid bet, Coach.

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

“FOUR”

 

Tanner is dumped over the ropes! But luckily he manages to land on the ring apron!

 

“THREE!”

 

COLE

Tanner is in danger!

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BZZZZZZT!

 

We are crawling along
At the edge of the world
Dance beneath the borders
Bring fences to fall
We seize the day
We own the night
Lets move measured and slow
Walk until the crimson shows

We taste honey, we smell blood
Raise your fists, open your hearts
We taste honey, we smell blood
Raise your fists

WE ARE THE NEXT ONES TO COME
YOU WON'T TAKE US DOWN
WE ARE THE NEXT ONES TO COME
YOU WON'T TAKE US DOWN

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

The Lion emerges.

 

Blaine rushes down the ring, blond hair flowing freely behind him. When he reaches the ring he pushes Tanner back inside!

 

COLE

Tanner saved by Blaine!
 

COACH

That was dumb.

 

COLE

Well, Tanner is an ally of sorts.

 

Blaine climbs to the top turnbuckle, which causes Cello to go after him. However, Blaine counters his charge by using a diving double stomp that lands right on Cello's face!

 

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

 

COLE

A hard double stomp!

 

Mounting Cello, Blaine rains down a barrage of punches on his opponent. Cello only takes so much of these before he shoves Blaine off. Staggering to his feet, Blaine is caught with a high impact elbow smash that knocks him over the ropes...and onto the apron!

 

COLE

Murder of a Greenhorn!

 

COACH

Blaine is in danger.

 

Not for long as Tanner saves the day and hits Cello with a lungblower! He keeps Outlaw on his knees and Blaine comes back into the ring, nailing the New Mexican with an Arbian Press!

 

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Welsh Press!

 

TANNER

Give it up, New York, lets go!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Cello is brought to his feet by Tanner and Blaine who have every idea to pitch him to the outside. But, the former criminal holds on for dear life and eventually elbows the two youngsters away.

 

CELLO

Fucking kids.

 

“TEN!”

 

COLE

Its almost that time!
 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

“SEVEN”

 

 

COACH

Get ready for Virgil!

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

Cello whips Tanner into the corner, but Tanner moves out the way!

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

Blaine comes in with a splash, but Cello uses his momentum against him and dumps him over the ropes!

 

COLE

Blaine in trouble!

 

“THREE!”

 

Using one hand, Blaine saves himself and pulls his body back onto the apron!

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

Wanna bite the hand that feeds me, wanna turn the tides

Set the demons free and watch 'em fly

Strike down the one who leads me, I'm gonna take his place

Gonna vindicate the human race

 

Better watch out 'cause I'm a war machine

Better watch out 'cause I'm a war machine, yeah

 

“OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!”

 

COACH

Awww shit!

 

Lead by Rick Heyross, the Champagne Papi, the War Machine Brock Lesnar is a tank rolling to the ring.

 

COLE

One of the giants in this Lethal Rumble, and has to have a huge advantage.

 

As Brock enters the ring, Cello is trying to force Blaine out the match entirely. The rookie fights him off, battering him with a series of forearms to the face. Backed up Cello has to deal with Blaine descending on him with a springboard lariat. Deal with him he does as Cello nails him with a leaping uppercut!

 

COLE

Knocked him clean out the air!

 

COACH

This dude Blaine is going to hard. He'll never last to the end at this rate.

 

Brock takes Tanner onto his shoulders setting up an F-Stunner-5 that worries the MSG crowd. But, the tanned one slips out of the hold and swiftly attacks Brock with a dropkick to the knee. Cello is quick to join him and the two men begin pounding on Brock.

 

COLE

This is smart thinking.

 

COACH

Yeah, you gotta get Brock out early.

 

Brock doesn't take to kindly to being doubled teamed and ends up wiping out both men with double lariats! As Tanner is the smaller of the two, Brock picks him over his shoulders and prepares for elimination. But right as he gets to the ropes, Blaine attacks him with a chop block and he falls to the mat freeing Tanner.

 

TANNER

You're a pretty handy guy to have around.

 

BLAINE'

If anyone is tossing you out its me.

 

TANNER

Good thing, bad thing?

 

BLAINE

Just a thing.

 

“TEN”!

 

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

COLE

Its always a mystery on who's going to come out next

 

“SEVEN!”

 

“SIX!”

 

“FIVE”

 

Blaine instructs Tanner to stand beside him in a defense position.

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

“THREE”

 

 

“TWO”

 

BLAINE

Whoever comes let them enter the ring.

 

TANNER

Okay.

 

BLAINE

Then kick them in the nuts and toss them out.

 

“ONE!”

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

Baby listen I'm not on DRUGS, I'm not on DRUGS
I'm just in LOVE
Oooh, baby don't you see
I'm not on
DRUGS, I'm not on DRUGS
I'm just in LOVE
You high enough for me

 

“YYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAA!” the fans are unglued for Alix!

 

COLE

The Hollywood Bad Girl looking to win her first rumble!

 

BLAINE

Oh. A girl. You can handle her.

 

TANNER

Okay, sure...wait, no. What the fuck?!!

 

Alix slides into the ring wild and reckless, going straight through Tanner's legs and popping up behind him.

 

ALIX

Tanner, my main man, wassssssup!

 

TANNER

I'm not Sha...wait up, you called me by my real name. You didn't confuse me for Shayne this time. Maybe now we can be, you, know friends?

 

SUPERKICK by ALIX!

 

ALIX

Friends with a white guy ? Gross!

 

Alix turns from Tanner and goes about her Lethal Rumble business. She aids Cello in starting to push Brock over the ropes, but The War Machine fights them off. Apparently unconcerned about Tanner, Blaine goes after Brock. But instead of helping him, Cello attacks Alix and now do the two fight!

 

COLE

Alix and Cello had a rivalry that was settled last year in The Money In The Bank match at Anglemania, but hard feelings still persist.

 

 

Cello manages to overpower Alix and then situates her onto the top turnbuckle. The fans are filled with worry as Outlaw backs up for a charge. But when he comes forward Alix leaps onto his shoulders and expels him from the ring with a hurricanrana!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

First man eliminated!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Outlaw Cello

Entered: 2nd

Eliminated: 1st

Eliminated by: Alix Maria Spezia

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

Our first man eliminated is Outlaw Cello!

 

Brock takes a swing at Blaine, punching him back into the corner. The War Machine tries to run in, but he's got off by a dropkick to the side of the skull by Tanner! The giant stumbles into the ropes and Tanner sniffs blood in the water. Using every bit of strength he has he tries to take Brock out the ring!

 

COLE

Tanner! Tanner!

 

Just as Alix comes to help Tanner, Brock shoves him away, wasting her time.

 

ALIX

See? White guys.

 

“TEN”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!

 

Brock lines Alix up for a lariat, but misses due to her sliding out of the ring enitrely!

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

COLE

Going under the ropes doesn't count.

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZT

 

All a nigga want is some of that lip service

All a nigga want is some of that lip service

 

“BBBOOOOOOOOOOOOO”

 

COLE

The wrestler of the year is here!

 

Yes it is the wrestler of the year; Big Papa Thrust curses and blusters as he charges to the ring!

 

COACH

Here's a hero to battered spouses everywhere. You deserve better than Ohlala, son!

 

Big Papa throws himself into the ring and looks for a fight. He sure does get one Alix clubs him with a forearm to the back.

 

BIG PAPA THRUST

Do you see how big this back is?!

 

ALIX

Do you see how big this ass is?

 

BIG PAPA THRUST

God damn!

 

Big Papa gets that Latina booty, just not in the way he wants as Alix hits him with a butt bump! The Missionary Man is pushed into the ropes and Blaine cracks him with a dropkick! Lucky for him he just lands on the apron.

 

COACH

A little too close for BPT.

 

Big Papa Thrust rolls back into the ring with Blaine still hounding him. Tired of these attacks, Big Papa whips Blaine at Brock. The War Machine throws a lariat at Blaine, but the Welsh grappler turns it into a crossarm side Russian leg sweep.

 

“YYYYEAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Calls that Song for a Sad Girl! But what girl wouldn't be happy with a guy who looks like Blaine.

 

Those good looks are threatened as Alix starts pumping forearms at Blaine. He's forced to coverup and Alix thinks she can lift him over the ropes. But that's kiboshed when Big Papa Thrust smashes them both with a corner splash! Wasting no time he grabs Alix and tosses her over the ropes!

 

“BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

But wait! Alix has tangled her furry boots around the bottom rope and uses that grip to pull herself back to safety!

 

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” the fans sing.

 

Big Papa Thrust has no time to be mad as he now has to deal with Tanner. BPT weathers Tanner's storm and promptly presses him overhead. He can't throw him out as Tanner manages to slip out the hold. Joining with Blaine they hit a pair of single leg dropkicks to either side of Big Papa's head!

 

COLE

BPT got his brain rattled!

 

COACH

We don't pay him to think. We pay him to kick ass.

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

BLAINE

Get. Her.

 

TANNER

So now you're ready to help me.

 

BLAINE

I guess I overestimated your competence. Won't happen again.

 

TANNER

:(

 

FOUR!

 

ALIX

Two boys want Alix! But don't all the boys want Ally Cat?

 

THREE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

ONE!

 

Now I'm just chasing time
With a thousand dreams I'm holding heavy
And as we cross the line these fading beats have all been severed
Don't tell me our youth is running out
It's only just begun

If I asked you for good news

Would you smile and turn away?
It's like a bad dream
That is too afraid to wake

 

BZZZZZZZZZT!

 

COLE

Entry number seven is Spencer Regier!

 

BLAINE

Sorry, Tanner, I've got a date.

 

TANNER

Whhaaaa?

 

Tanner watches Blaine leave him to wait for Spencer!

 

ALIX

(to Tanner)

Looks like you hitched your scrotum to the wrong schlong, cowboy.

 

Tanner hasn't even a moment to square up; Alix gets him by his lovely hair and sends him hurtling over the ropes directly to the outside!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Tanner Neptune

Entered: 1st

Eliminated: 2nd

Eliminated by: Alix Maria Spezia

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

And Alix has eliminated the first two entries into the rumble. She's also responsible for the only eliminations.

 

Spencer tries to get into the ring, but Blaine clobbers him with punches and pushes him right back out.

 

SPENCER

You're serious with this?

 

BLAINE

What do you think, you fucking goofball?

 

Now Spencer is a little worried about getting into the ring. After all why face this golden haired mad child. But his qualms don't matter as now Blaine reaches through the ropes and takes hold of his hair. He then sucks him into the battleground!
 

COLE

Now he wants him in the ring?!

 

COACH

That kid is out of control. He fucks over Teen Scream now he can't make up his mind whether he wants Spencer in the ring or out.

 

Blaine forces Spencer into the corner and begins unleashing the dreaded ten punches!

 

“ONE!”

“TWO!”

“THREE!”

“FOUR!”

 

Big Papa Thrust shoves Blaine off the top rope and out of the ring!

 

COLE

Blaine is out!

 

But, wait! Blaine lands on the stairs!

 

BIG PAPA THRUST

Get out this ring!

 

BLAINE

Make me you bloody overgrown arse.

 

Blaine scrambles up the stairs where Big Papa Thrust and Spencer are waiting for him. This is of no matter to him as he smack their heads together!

 

COLE

Nice move by Blaine!

 

The Lion climbs up to the top rope and throws aside caution to hit these two with a double lariat!

 

“BLAINE! BLAINE! BLAINE!”

 

Blaine whips his blond locks back and then goes to assist Alix with Brock.

 

COLE

No hard feelings between these two now.

 

COACH

I guess Tanner outlived his usefulness for Blaine.

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

“SEVEN”

 

COACH

Next is Baron. I have the scoops.

 

“SIX!”

 

“FIVE”

 

Alix and Blaine are making little headway in getting Brock over the ropes.

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

“THREE!'

 

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BBZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

I Can Feel The Beat!

 

Daisuke Motozaki emerges with JACKETSWAG~!

 

COLE

Daisuke Motozaki beat his friend Faqu to qualify for this match.

 

Daisuke slides into the ring and immediately goes after Brock. Shoving aside Alix and Blaine, Brock begins slugging it out with Daisuke! The two mean wail on each other with thudding, heavy punches!

 

COLE

Look at these giants slugging it out!

 

Suddenly, Big Papa Thrust comes forward and clobbers them both with lethal punches!

 

BIG PAPA THRUST

Big Papa Thrust, btiches!

 

“BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

The Missionary Man is of a mind to press slam Daisuke, but the Japanese star uses elbows to fight free before that move can even happen. Now Daisuke goes on the attack and tries to throw Big Papa Thrust out of the ring. Yet, the former world champion uses a grip on the ropes to prevent that from happening.

 

COLE

It would be a boon for the field if Big Papa Thrust was eliminated.

 

Big Papa Thrust elbows Daisuke away, but the Japanese star comes back with a roaring elbow to bowl BPT over! Pleased with himself, Daisuke pops his JACKET~!

 

“JACKET! JACKET! JACKET!”

 

Elsewhere, Brock has Alix over his shoulders. But its not for long as Alix counters with a tornado DDT! Although hurt, Brock still finds his way upright rather quickly. Blaine sees an opening and slams his entire body into The War Machine. This staggers Brock back only a little, but luckily Daisuke is there to hit him with a lariat that pushes him into the ropes.

 

COLE

The War Machine about to go out of commission!

 

The War Machine explodes forward and takes Daisuke down with a diving shoulder tackle! No rest for the weary as Blaine starts stomping away at both giants. But even he falls prey to Spencer who hits him with a running bulldog!

 

COLE

New York Knockout!

 

SPENCER

Ha! Ha! How'd that feel, psycho stalker?

 

“TEN”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

COLE

Here we go, folks!

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

“SEVEN!”

 

Blaine has the good sense to hang onto the bottom rope so that Spencer can't move him.

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

COLE

Someone is chomping at the bit to get out here!

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

I stay out too late

Got nothing in my brain

That's what people say, mmm-mmm

That's what people say, mmm-mmm

 

I go on to many dates [chuckle]

But I can't make 'em stay

At least that's what people say, mmm-mmm

That's what people say, mmm-mmm

 

But I keep cruising

Can't stop, won't stop moving

It's like I got this music

In my mind

Singing, "It's gonna be alright."

 

'Cause the players gonna play, play, play, play, play

And the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate

Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

I shake it off, I shake it off

Heart-breakers gonna break, break, break, break, break

And the fakers gonna fake, fake, fake, fake, fake

Baby, I'm just gonna shake, shake, shake, shake, shake

I shake it off, I shake it off

 

 

”YEEEAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

The entrance doors spread apart and out arrives the queen of all she sees, Krista Isadora Duncan!

 

COLE

A lethal number nine in the Lethal Rumble!

 

Krista makes a Baywatch style trot to the ring, bouncing all along as she does. When she enters the ring, the clothes come off!

 

 

KRISTA

Alright, who's cock am I gonna suck first?

 

ALIX

Krissy, this is the Lethal Rumble not the Lethal Bang.

 

KRISTA

Oh...this is awkward.

 

Casual as can be, Krista kicks Daisuke in the balls and then pitches him over the ropes!!!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Daisuke Motozaki

Entered: 8th

Eliminated: 3rd

Eliminated by: Krista Isadora Duncan

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

KRISTA

What a dumb jacket.

 

Over in the corner, Big Papa Thrust is busy choking Brock with his boot. But miraculously, Brock grabs hold of Big Papa Thrust's boot and upends him to the ground. Stomping after Big Papa, Brock is caught with a standing dropkick to the back by Spencer. This hits him hard but only dumps him through the ropes. Right after that Blaine decides to pitch Spencer over the ropes. Problem is Spencer runs into a great pink wall that is Brock!

 

BROCK

:angry:

 

BLAINE

You pissed him off. Nicely done, lad.

 

Lucky for Spencer, Big Papa Thrust intercepts Brock and starts battering him with clubbing blows. The two muscle bound warriors brawl and eventually topple themselves to the ground. Brock pops up first, only to get hit with a double face crusher by COD that lands him on Big Papa's big balls!

 

ALIX

We did something!

 

KRISTA

Middle class work. Disgusting.

 

Spencer is slugging Blaine in the corner, bashing him with stomps to the chest.

 

KRISTA

Honey, what's going on, what are you doing?

 

SPENCER

This guy wants to kill me!

 

ALIX

Ah, young love!

 

KRISTA

Oh. Well, I suggest a good stabbing, drowning works if you don't want blood. I know a Korean fellow who can dispose of the body. Let me know if you need the number.

 

Spencer contemplates what Krista said, but in the end decides to just sit Blaine on the top turnbuckle.

 

COACH

This dude Spencer is gonna cook up a highlight reel spot.

 

With the fans abuzz, Spencer climbs up with Blaine. Yet when he tries to put on a front facelock, Blaine shoves him to the side and crotches him on the ropes!

 

KRISTA

Oooohh poor form, poor form.

 

Roaring as only The Lion can Blaine throws a top rope Cruel Intention lariat that launches Spencer off the ropes and out of the match!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Spencer Reiger

Entered: 7th

Eliminated: 4th

Eliminated by: Blaine Cayley

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

BLAINE

Bye, Spencer.

 

COACH

This dude has no chill. Fuck is wrong with this pretty boy.

 

TEN!

 

 

NINE!

 

 

EIGHT!

 

 

COLE

One exits and another one enters!

 

 

“SEVEN”

 

 

“SIX!”

 

Blaine goes right after COD, not the best of the ideas at all.

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

Alix pins Blaine's arms behind his back while Krista gives him a dental exam. With the back of her hand.

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

It’s hard letting go,
I’m finally at peace, but it feels wrong,
Slow I’m getting up,
My hands and feet are weaker than before.


And you are folded on the bed
Where I rest my head,
There’s nothing I can see,
Darkness becomes me.

But I’m already there,
I’m already there,
Wherever there is you,
I will be there too,
There’s nothing that I’d take back,
But it’s hard to say there’s nothing I regret.

 

“YEEEEAAAAHHHHHHH!”

 

Clad in bold red trunks, Teddy Buckworth sprints towards the rumble!

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KRISTA

Look, Alix, its Ted!

 

ALIX

Yoo-hoo, Bucky! Over yonder!

 

Buckworth enters the ring and immediately approaches COD.

 

BUCKWORTH

Ladies I can not place enough emphasis on the need to take this one match seriously.

 

ALIX

I liked you better when you didn't use big words. “Seriousl.” Like use words you know.

 

BUCKWORTH\

You approach this as a lark at your own peril.

 

Having said his peace, Teddy makes a move on Big Papa Thrust whipping him into the ropes. Big Papa comes hurtling back with a lariat, that Buckworth ducks but that hits Blaine. Not caring about Blaine, Big Papa Thrust spins around gets rocked by a running knee from Buckworth!

 

COLE

House of The Rising Knee!

 

Brock appears suddenly and tries to carry BPT over the ropes! This results in quite the struggle as both men are teetering over the cables. Buckworth tries to give them a “helpful” push but they each crash back to the ring mat before he can act. No problem for Blaine, as he pounces on Big Papa Thrust and batters him with punches.

 

COLE

No rest for Blaine out here in his first Lethal Rumble.

 

Blaine pulls Big Papa Thrust upright and stashes him into a front facelock. Whatever move he has planned doesn't go off as Alix dropkicks him in the back. Blaine falls aside, landing against the corner posts. That's when Krista strikes and shoves him over the corner! Blaine rolls and rolls falling down the stairs but saving himself before he hits the floor!

 

KRISTA

Honey, you have moxy. I'll be sure to spend the next three years humiliating it out of you.

 

“TEN!”

 

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

COLE

Less than ten seconds away from our next entrant!

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVBE!

 

Blaine crawls back into the ring and is immediately seized by Alix!

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

“THREE!”

 

 

Blaine grabs Alix by the waist band and throws her against the ropes. But Alix handsprings back and lands on him with a splash!

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

Scream, shout
Scream, shout,
We are the fallen angels

We are the in between, cast down as sons of war
Struck to the earth like lightning, on this world we're torn
We won't cause the pain, of living out their law
Take joy in who you are, we know our wings are flawed

 

Fat as fat can be Sloppy Joe waddles to the ring.

 

COLE

Here's a man who's going to be pretty hard to eliminate.

 

COACH

Pretty hard? Who can move this fat ass?

 

Sloppy Joe enters the ring and starts waylaying his foes. Alix is knocked over with a punch, Krista falls to another, and Blaine is brought down by Joe slamming his fat body right into him!

 

COLE

Two other members of The Menagerie in this match, Silver and Leon Rodez.

 

Sloppy stares at Big Papa Thurst and waves him on!

 

BIG PAPA THRUST

You think I'm a Big Buford with your FAT ASS!

 

The muscle man and the fat man go right at each other hammering one another with chops!

 

COLE

I'd give the edge on striking to Big Papa Thrust but Sloppy is a lot of man. A whole lot of man. He's even fatter than Kareem!

 

Krista rushes at Brock, an unusually bad idea as Ausstin upends her over the ropes and dumps her on the apron! Alix tries to stop Brock from attacking her, but Brock wards her off with an elbow. This gives Brock open season on Krista and he smashes her off the apron!

 

 

 

But Krista flies backwards and lands on the guardrail!

 

COLE

Amazing!

 

COACH

Amazing but now what? How's she gonna get back into the ring?

 

Brock seems to think she has no chance of returning and taunts her with the Happy Hoss Dance!

 

 

But pride comes before the fall and Teddy Buckworth pitches him over the ropes!

 

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Brock Ausstin

Entered: 4th

Eliminated: 5th

Eliminated by: Teddy Buckworth

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

Brock is gone! Brock is gone!

 

That's advantageous to Krista as she leaps onto Brock's chest and uses him as a bridge to make a graceful return to the ring!

 

COACH

Even without trying Krista ruins people's lives.

 

“TEN!”

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT”

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

COLE

We are on entry number twelve!

 

On the outside Brock is yelling at Buckworth with the referee's telling him to head backstage.

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

Finally, Brock storms backstage accepting his defeat.

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

 

 

“ONE!”

 

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

Because I was born this way
I got lightning running thru my veins
Ain't nobody gonna stop this train
So hop on board, or get out the way
Because I was born this way
I got lightning running thru my veins
Ain't nobody gonna stop this train
You can't stop us, we can't be stopped

 

COLE

Oh yeah!

 

The sterling white cowboy boots of Mister Dick carry The Human Hard On to the ring!

 

 

But Big Papa Thrust moves to intercept him!

 

COACH

Its about to get ignant!

 

Mister Dick and Big Papa Thrust engage in a violent fight that has the crowd ELECTRIFIFED!

 

KRISTA

Honies, don't fight, this makes me sad. Think of all the double penetrations we've had!

 

Alas Krista can't get these two to act correctly, but they do at least roll in the ring to continue their brawl. But Sloppy Joe finds the mark and hits them both with a splash! Luckily for Big Papa Thurst, Mister Dick takes most of the blow.

 

COACH

That was pretty smart by Sloppy.

 

The fat one can't capitalize on that due to Blaine hitting him with a diving double stomp! And he's struck by Alix, who clobbers him with body blows. These attacks are stomached by Blaine and he batters Alix with kicks. This doubles Alix up and Blaine tosses her over the ropes!

 

COLE

Alix in trouble!

 

The Hollywood Bad Girl catches hold of the ropes and starts skining the cat. The problem is Blaine catches hold of her ankles and has every intention of flipping her off. But Alix uses Blaine's hands and his entire body to flip herself back into the ring!

 

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!”

 

COLE

Alix has never won a Lethal Rumble but could tonight in Madison Square Garden be her night?

 

 

“TEN”

 

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

 

“EIGHT”!

 

 

Sloppy Joe goes back to attacking Big Papa Thrust and Mister Dick!

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

Mister Dick and Big Papa Thrust make common cause and beat down Sloppy Joe.

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

Common cause gone, Mister Dick and Big Papa Thrust resume the warring!

 

“TWO!”

 

 

 

“ONE!”

 

 

BZZZZZZZZZZTTTT!

 

I'm giving you a night call to tell you how I feel
I want to drive you through the night, down the hills
I'm gonna tell you something you don't want to hear
I'm gonna show you where it's dark, but have no fear

 

“BBBBOOOOOOOOO!”

 

COLE

The Sultan of Sleeze!

 

Remy Bazil as expected is in no hurry to get to the ring and takes his good time in getting down the ramp.

 

COLE

No one claimed Remy was courageous.

 

No one is waiting for Remy especially not Big Papa Thrust and Mister Dick who duke it out in the corner. Jock has the upper hand on his newfound rival, but Big Papa Thrust backs him off with a thumb to the eye. Blinded, Mister Dick has no idea Big Papa Thrust is coming at him with a lariat. But he finds out when that giant arm slams into his chest. Thanks to Remy lowering the rope The Human Hard makes a shocking exit from the Lethal Rumble!

 

CROWD

:o

 

COLE

Mister Dick is gone! Remy and Big Papa Thrust screwed him!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Mister Dick

Entered: 12th

Eliminated: 6th

Eliminated by: Big Papa Thrust

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

“BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT!” the New Yorkers call out.

 

BIG PAPA THRUST

What's bullshit is that cocksucker has the nerve to look me in the face! Get the fuck outta my sight, Jock!

 

No less than six of the referees have to hold Jock back from getting into the ring and resuming his furious fight.

 

COLE

Who's he going to go after Remy or Big Papa Thrust.

 

Sloppy Joe takes a run at Krista, but ends up getting hit with a leg sweep. He lands on his oversized tush, leading Krista to take a run of the ropes and smack him with a knee!

 

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

VINTAGE Krista!

 

The fitness queen takes to the air and lands a perfect shooting star press on Sloppy! Problem is he's so fat that it has no effect! Sloppy presses Krista off him and launches her totally over the ropes! Krista lands on the apron and starts to roll off, but fortunately catches herself.

 

COACH

There's some strength beneath all that blubber!

 

Sloppy Joe has a mind to take Krista out once and for all, but Alix stops him by leaping onto his back. This is but a minor annoyance to the Nebraska native as he drops backwards and powerbombs himself to crush Alix beneath his mass of blubber!

 

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

 

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

Sloppy Joe pats his stomach, understandably pleased with himself!

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

Teddy and Blaine are fighting with Blaine using kicks to wear Teddy down.

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BBZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

The game ends here, the structures fall

Collapsing walls, I'll let you know this time

A curtain call, the final thoughts

To end it all so now you know you're mine

 

Your worst nightmare

You'll work for your soul here, and I said

It's not what you wanted

But you'll get hung, drawn and quartered in here

 

COLE

Big Boy!

 

COACH

In his first Lethal Rumble!

 

The husky member of Slaughterhouse storms the ring, eager to make his mark in the rumble.

 

COLE

Let's see what Big Boy can do!

 

Big Boy is immediately confronted by Sloppy Joe!

 

COLE

Two big guys going right at it.

 

Big Boy seems to take actual offense to being assaulted by Sloppy. He takes Sloppy over his shoulder, which is amazing enough. But even more thrilling is that he rushes across the ring and launches Sloppy out the ring entirely!

 

“HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!”

 

COACH

DAYUM~!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Sloppy Joe

Entered: 11th

Eliminated: 7th

Eliminated by: Big Boy

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

BIG BOY

This isn't the place for fat boys, its the place for BIG BOY!

 

“BIG BITCH! BIG BITCH! BIG BITCH!”

 

BIG BOY

You wouldn't say that to my face!

 

Someone who does get in Big Boy's face is Big Papa Thrust. The Missionary Man grabs hold of him and seeks a belly to belly. But Big Boy blocks the attack and then goes on the attack himself. Using Big Papa Thrust's signature move he tosses him out the ring with a violent two handed chokeslam!

 

“OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Big Papa Thrust

Entered: 6th

Eliminated: 8th

Eliminated by: Big Boy

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

Big Boy just eliminated the wrestler of the year!

 

COACH

Yo, this guy is my pick to win it all. He's incredible.

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

Alix combats Big Boy, wisely using a pair of kicks to his legs.

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

Less wisely she tries to throw him over the ropes but gets thrown over herself!

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

Having landed on the apron, Alix springboards back in and hammers Big Boy with a spear!

 

“YYYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Coming Straight out of Compton!

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

 

“ONE!”

 

 

BBBBBBBBBBBBBZZZZT!

 

Am I wrong cause I wanna get it on till I die?
Am I wrong cause I wanna get it on till I die?
Get it on till I die
Get it on till I die
Y'all, Y'all remember me
Y'all, Y'all remember me

"YEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

 

COLE

Reject! Reject!

 

COACH

A native of the Bronx right here in Madison Square Garden!

 

Back in the OAOAST, Reject dashes to the ring as confident as ever.

 

Remy sees Big Boy is weakened and joins with Alix in trying to force him over the ropes!

 

COACH

My pick! My pick!

 

Big Boy explodes with strength and back drops Alix and Remy over the ropes! Remy hits the ground first and Alix lands right on him....saving herself from elimination!

 

COLE

Remy saved Alix!

 

ALIX

Hey thanks, mang, me and Maya will blow you later, kay.

 

REMY

:)

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Remy Bazil

Entered: 13th

Eliminated: 9th

Eliminated by: Big Boy

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

Reject and Krista are locked in a tussle, each trying to force one another over the ropes.

 

KRISTA

You better help me, Teddy!

 

BUCKWORTH

Are you aware it is every person for themselves in this affair?

 

KRISTA

You were the maid of honor at my wedding, and I backed off the demand to make you wear a dress.

 

BUCKWORTH

Only after you flogged me.

 

Fortunately Buckworth doesn't have to decide on anything as Blaine starts hitting him with chops. These blows aren't suffered by Ted as she sweeps Blaine in a standing fireman's carry!

 

COLE

Time to write Blaine off?

 

Not quite yet, as Blaine slips off the shoulders and shoves Buckworth right into the rampaging path Big Boy! But no friends here as Blaine smashes Boy with a superkick. Krista then strikes with a KIDology and Big Boy is out. Or seemingly so. Rather he comes to life and slams into Reject to lariat him over the ropes!

 

 

“BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Reject

Entered: 15th

Eliminated: 10th

Eliminated by: Big Boy

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

Who can stop Big Boy?!

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

Big Boy's efforts to toss over Teddy prove less than fruitful.

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZT

 

Oh, what a cold, dark world it is to walk through
Alone with a fear-filled head
Thinking of losing you is a haunted song
And a dread much worse than the fear of death

Now I feel the fear rising up
Climbing up, taking over my body
And I feel my pulse starting up
Waking me again

Open my eyes, I'm reaching for you
Set me on fire, set me on fire
I'm burning inside, I'm waiting for you
Set me on fire, set me on fire

 

“YEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Come get you some, Oscar Friberg!

 

The ultra popular baby face ascends to the top turnbuckle when he reaches the ring. He takes aim at Big Boy who is pounding on Blaine. A missile dropkick takes care of that and dumps Big Boy to the side.

 

BLAINE

Oh, you. Maybe you'll be more useful than Tanner. I rather doubt it though.

 

Oscar rolls his eyes and actually goes a separate way from Blaine. He takes over on Big Boy, battering him with blows to the arm. When those conclude he looks in a fujiwara armbar!

 

COLE

The Crowbar!

 

COACH

That'll make it hard for Big Boy to eliminate anyone else.

 

Teddy is in the process of forcing Blaine over the ropes. The only problem is Blaine has wrapped his entire body around the ropes. Well, Teddy is a veteran so he uses this as a moment to clobber Blaine with knees to the ribs.

 

COLE

Blaine's going to have trouble breathing with those hits to the ribs.

 

COACH

Not to mention the fact that he's been in here longer than anyone else.

 

Using his considerable power, Big Boy forces Oscar off him. Determined to continue the attack, Oscar charges at Big Boy buts overpowered by a discus big boot!
 

“OOOOOHHHHHHHHHH”

 

COLE

Oh my!

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

“SEVEN”

 

 

Blaine falls to the mat, but still holds onto the ropes.

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

Teddy stomps away at Blaine, but no matter what Blaine refuses to go down.

 

“THREE!”

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

This is survival of the fittest
This is do or die
This is the winner takes it all
So take it all

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Whipping off his burnt orange vest, The Orange County Cobra hauls ass to the ring!

 

COLE

Former world champion, Ned Blanchard!

 

Ned enters the ring and ducks a lariat from Big Boy. Off the ropes he comes and smacks Big Boy with a Thez Press!

 

BLANCHARD

Stand your ass up you bearded son of a bitch!

 

Big Boy does stand up and Ned launches him into the corner. The Cobra then strikes big with a corner avalanche that sinks Big Boy to the ground. From there Ned pops the crowd as he stomps a mudhole in Big Boy and walks it dry!

 

“NED! NED! NED!”

 

Ned has a serious problem as Alix pitches him over the ropes! But, Ned is able to land on his feet on the aprons and moves himself back into the battleground. Big Boy is there to confront him instead of Alix, and starts delivering beastly knees in the clinch.

 

COLE

Big Boy from Medicine Hat, Alberta, Canada.

 

COACH

Do they make em all that huge in Medicine Hat?

 

Alix latches onto Big Boy's head and bashes his face into the corner. Letting bygones be bygones Ned assists her and together they both smash his face against the posts.

 

COACH

Yep, you're gonna have to work together to get Big Boy out this thing.

 

Big Boy won't suffer any more of this and elbows both Alix and Ned to the side. This stirs Krista from her slumber and a corksckrew kick from her leaves Big Boy laid out against the corner posts.

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

Now Teddy is in a fight with Oscar, the two men trying to dump each other over the ropes!

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

Oscar seems to have Teddy over the edge of the ropes, but Buckworth comes back with a swift punch.

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BBZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

You are gasoline
You are fire and smoke

 

”BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

COLE

As JR would say business is about to pick up!

 

Flanked by two young squires, the armored Ser Pike Pantera cuts a fearsome figure. The squires remove his armor, his gilded sword and shield to prepare him for the fight.

 

COLE

Folks, this might be the winner right here!
 

Pike parades to the ring, slowly, confidently and with wild blue eyes sat on Krista.

 

KRISTA

Come and get it fuckboy.

 

Exhibiting no fear of Krista, Ser Pike enters the ring. But Krista shows no mercy for him and attacks him immediately!

 

COLE

Its about to get wild!

 

Pike pushes Krista away, only for her to come right back with a boot to his stomach. Doubled over, Pike is hooked inside a front facelock.

 

COLE

Going for Krista Ever After!

 

Pike makes a counter, using his incredible strength to lift Krista up and dump her over the ropes! Its only by sheer luck that she remains on the apron. But she makes use of that luck by springboarding back and hitting Ser Pike with a corckscrew forearm!

 

KRISTA

Alix, get over here!

 

ALIX

Right away, Massa! I shine yo shoes.

 

KRISTA

Unnecessary. Double booty time lets hit it on this aww shucks huck a buck piece of shit.

 

CHICKS OVER DICKS

booty-2girls2.gif

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

With the fans rooting them on, the seven time tag champs perform a moonsault onto Ser Pike!

 

 

TEN!

 

 

NINE!

 

 

EIGHT!

 

 

SEVEN!

 

 

COLE

Number nineteen on the way!

 

 

SIX!

 

 

FIVE!

 

Big Boy rises, showing little pain from his prior beating.

 

 

FOUR!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

ONE!

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

Chicken Noodle Soup
Chicken Noodle Soup
Chicken Noodle Soup
Wit A Soda On The Side

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Hey its, Chick Filet!

 

All of 5'3, barely taller than Morgan, Chick Filet scuries like a praie dog to the ring.

 

COACH

Look at Big Boy licking his lips, Chick is appetizer to him.

 

Chick rushes into the ring and slides right through Big Boy's legs!

 

BIG BOY

Get back here!

 

Chick does get back, using a spinning head scissors to take Big Boy for a dizzying ride! Its so disorientating that Big Boy has to use the ropes to bring himself upright.

 

COLE

That is not a good position to be in, Big Boy.

 

Chick leaps to the top turnbuckle, giving the fans a reason to pop. As they cheer him on he leaps off with a dropkick that smacks Big Boy in the head...

 

 

And dumps him over the ropes and out the ring!

 

 

“YYEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Big Boy from Medcine Hat, Alberta is gone! His run of dominance is done!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Big Boy

Entered: 14th

Eliminated: 11th

Eliminated by: Big Boy

Eliminations: Big Papa Thrust, Sloppy Joe, Reject, Remy Bazil

~~~~~~~~

 

CHICK

Go on with ya corn fed ass, Big WHHOAAAAAAAA!

 

The whoa is because Krista pitches him outside as though he were a piece of garbage.

 

KRISTA

I find the fact the OAOAST allows midget Steve Harvey to use part of my tag team's name as his first name to be distasteful.

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Chick Filet

Entered: 19th

Eliminated: 12th

Eliminated by: Krista Isadora Duncan

Eliminations: Big Boy

~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

From hero to zero for Chick Filet.

 

COACH

His name is Chick Filet he'll always be a zero.

 

Ned whips Blaine into the ropes, but makes the mistake of telegraphing a backdrop. Blaine flips over Ned's back and then twists him up and around for a dangerous vetebreaker!

 

“YYEAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Blaine calls that Bittersweet Romance!

 

 

TEN!

 

 

NINE!

 

 

EIGHT!

 

Blaine tries to get rid of Ned, but the former world champion has enough in him to block such a measure.

 

 

SEVEN!

 

 

SIX!

 

 

FIVE!

 

Ned starts hammering Blaine with overhand rights, but that's snuffed out by Oscar drilling him with a high knee!

 

BLAINE

About time you did something.

 

FOUR!

 

 

THREE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

ONE!

 

Ser Pike sits up with a blank expression on his face as we hear...

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

Bruh, I see, girls everywhere

Titties, ass, hands in the air, it's a party over here

Shake it for the man of the year

Uh, man of the year, man of the... bounce

 

"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

 

COACH

THE MAN!

 

Joined by Rick Heyross, Bohemoth flexes his awe inspiring muscles before descending upon the ring!

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Bohemoth tears into the ring and is set upon by Teddy. There's no beating The Man and he flattens Buckworth with a STIFF LARIAT! Right after he does that, he spins around delivers another lariat to Alix!

 

“BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
 

Krista comes after Bohemoth and is struck down by a looping left hook. The worst is saved for Oscar who is drilled into the mat with a spinebuster!

 

“BBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

Ned leaps off the top rope, coming at Bohemoth with an axe handle smash. Its a wasted effort as Bohemoth swats him out the air with an overhand chop!

 

“BBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

Blaine launches himself at Bohemoth, and meets a worse fate than Ned as Bohemoth destroys him with a harrowing chokeslam!

 

BOHEMOTH

I'M THE MAN!

 

GORE BY PIKE!

 

COLE

Smoking Gun!

 

SER PIKE

You know how much I hate The Man.

 

COACH

Ser Pike and Bohemoth have never gotten along.

 

COLE

Its Pike laughing now.

 

COACH

I don't think Ser Pike is the type of dude to chuckle.

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

Ser Pike picks Ned up, a limp victim that should be easy to pitch over the ropes.

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

 

“SIX!”

 

But Ned shows thrilling life and begins walloping Pike with punches!

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

With the upperhand, Ned lariats Pike into the ropes. Into but not over as Pike sags to the ground.

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

 

“TWO!

 

 

 

 

“ONE!”

 

And our people talk to me, but nothing ever hits,
So people talk to me, and all the voices just burn holes.
I’m going in (ooh)

This is the start of how it all ever ends
They used to shout my name, now they whisper it
I’m speeding up and this is the
Red, orange, yellow flicker beat sparking up my heart
We rip the start, the colors disappear
I never watch the stars there’s so much down here
So I just try to keep up with them
Red, orange, yellow flicker beat sparking up my heart

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

 

Emerging through parted entrance doors is Silver, owner of the kind of manic smile that would frighten children into never leaving their house.

 

COLE

Former world champion, Silver looking to win the Lethal Rumble in his hometown!

 

As soon as Silver enters the ring he assists Ned in trying to get Pike over the ropes. But when that proves too difficult, Silver gives up.

 

SILVER

What a trooper this Pike is! I'm going to help him win the Rumble!

 

Silver makes good in his promise as he snaps off a dropkick that sends Ned hurtling over the ropes and out of the ring!

 

“BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Ned Blanchard

Entered: 17th

Eliminated: 13th

Eliminated by: Silver

Eliminations:

~~~~~~~~

 

SILVER

We're gonna do it, Ser Pike Pantera!

 

Ned is righteously pissed off, and has to have no less than three security guards escort him to the back.

 

COACH

Good. Get that hothead out of here.

 

Not so fast! Ned starts running back to attack Silver, and two more security guards have to tackle him to the ground. Now a whopping five carry The Orange County Cobra to the back.

 

SILVER

That kind of attitude makes me sad. We're all in this together!

 

In slightly calmer areas of the ring, Bohemoth is choking Alix with his boott. Of course that doesn't sit well with Krista and she clocks him with an inverted DDT! Right next to them Pike has moved onto to attacking Blaine.

 

COLE

There's a future AngleMania mainevent right there.

 

This time its Blaine getting the upperhand as a leaping superkick lays Pike against the middle rope and seems to have the big man seeing stars.

 

COACH

Isn't Silver supposed to be helping Ser Pike?

 

COLE

I don't exactly think Silver is on the reliable side these days,

 

 

TEN!

 

 

NINE!

 

 

EIGHT!

 

 

 

SEVEN!

 

 

 

SIX!

 

 

FIVE!

 

 

FOUR!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

ONE!

 

This is survival of the fittest
This is do or die
This is the winner takes it all
So take it all

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

The handsome ill-tempered Texan, Baron Windells throws down his cowboy hat, and with a point to Silver makes his way to the ring!

 

SILVER

Me?!

 

Yes, you! Baron gets into the ring and decks Silver with a Texas Sized Right Hand!

 

“BARON! BARON! BARON!”

 

COLE

Baron getting some revenge for his Cobra Strike partner!

 

Silver is shot into the ropes by Baron and then hammered by the Cowboy Bebop elbow!

 

COLE

Things aren't looking good for the hometown, Silver!

 

SILVER

Stop! Stop! I live here!

 

That doesn't matter much to Baron who scoops Silver into his arms and throws him aside with a Fallaway Slam!

 

“YYYYYEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!”

 

COLE

Devil's Addiction!

 

Blaine continues to go after the big boys, taking on Bohemoth. He's less than successful with Bohemoth muscling him into the corner. The Beast looks on in a foul expression as he tries to push Blaine over the posts. Tries and fails due to Blaine's incredible resiliency.

 

COACH

Blaine's been in since number three. Number three! This dude might just...

 

COLE

Win?

 

COACH

He might!

 

TEN!

 

 

NINE!

 

 

EIGHT!

 

 

SEVEN!

 

Blaine wraps his legs around Bohemoth's face and uses a head scissors that drops him onto the apron but also drops Bohemoth's neck onto the ring ropes!

 

SIX!

 

 

FIVE!

 

 

FOUR!

 

 

Blaine springboards back into the ring to hit Bohemoth with a beautiful elbow drop!

 

 

THREE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

ONE!

 

Can't Stop It, Can't Stop It

 

BBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

 

COACH

SQUAD UP~!

 

Rick Heyross makes his second appearance of the night, beaming beside the touchdown dancing Xavier Franklin Long!

 

COLE

In his short career, The XFL has a massive list of illustrious accomplishments. Can he add Lethal Rumble winner to the mix?

 

The XFL slides into the warzone, greeted by Oscar Fribeg. The two warriors tangle up, leaning dangerously close to the ropes. Close enough for Blaine to dump The XFL over the ropes! But as soon as XFL lands on the apron she rolls back in and clings to the ropes.

 

BLAINE

Nice hair, lad. It was very popular back when I was five. You know 2001.

 

THE XFL

:(

 

Silver is basically running from Baron at this point, weaving and dodging like he was in the Frogger video game.

 

COLE

Baron might be too focused on ditching Silver.

 

Baron's single minded pursuit does cost him as Krista floors him with a high flipping lariat!

 

SILVER

Thank you, Krista! Thank you, you truly are a golden goddess. Its my duty to help you win the Lethal Rumble.

 

KRISTA

Amazingly, I liked you better when you were generic arrogant heel number 21.

 

Krista has better things to do than talk with Silver such as try to pry Ser Pike away from Buckworth. Pike barely notices her, which is both insulting and annoying. And when he swats her away with his backhand, she's even more annoyed.

 

COLE

We have to also credit Alix, entered in at number five and still going strong.

 

COACH

That's the adderall.

 

Alix is fending off Bohemoth and gets unexpected help from The XFL. He makes common cause with Alix and starts forcing Bo over the ropes.

 

COLE

I'd think The XFL would want to eliminate Bohemoth on his own. But I guess he'll take all the credit later.

 

“TEN!”

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

Bohemoth fends off Alix and The XFL, but the brawl continues with The Young Wolf.

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

“FOUR!

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

 

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

I look and stare so deep in your eyes,
I touch on you more and more every time,
When you leave I'm begging you not to go,
Call your name two or three times in a row,
Such a funny thing for me to try to explain,
How I'm feeling and my pride is the one to blame.
'Cuz I know I don't understand,
Just how your love can do what no one else can.


Got me looking so crazy right now, your love's
Got me looking so crazy right now (in love)
Got me looking so crazy right now, your touch
Got me looking so crazy right now (your touch)
Got me hoping you'll page me right now, your kiss
Got me hoping you'll save me right now
Looking so crazy in love's,
Got me looking, got me looking so crazy in love.

 

“YYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

So handsome and so deadly, Simon Singleton stalks to the ring like a panther through the night.

 

COLE

There he is, the hero who saved Mrs.Spoons!

 

COACH

I think Mister Maguire's nearly killing his son, helped that a bit.

 

COLE

As a result Colin is not in this rumble.

 

Silver runs into Simon, which seems a better prospect than running into Baron at least. Thus the two men come to quick blows. But Baron is hot on the trail and uses a lariat so powerful he dumps himself, Simon and Silver onto the apron!

 

COLE

The power of the big Texan!

 

Baron gets up and drags Silver into a front facelock!

 

COLE

No! Don't do it, Baron!

 

Desperate for an escape, Silver uses a low blow on Baron!

 

“OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

 

This shreds BW's hold and leaves him in major misery. Its also enough for Silver to shove him off the apron!

 

“BBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Baron Windels

Entered: 17th

Eliminated: 14th

Eliminated by: Silver

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

About the only thing that saves Silver from utter decimation is that the low blow continues to riddle Baron with hurt.

 

SILVER

WHHHAAAAAAA-HAAAAAAAA! The vile snakes in the grass stomped out and sent to the depths of hades! Its almost biblical!

 

Bohemoth nearly has Teddy over the ropes, but Simon comes by and saves the day. He beats The Man away from his partner, and then sends him off into the ropes. Silver gets in the way, and Bohemoth exerts his anger on him with a diving shoulder block! Now Bohemoth looks to throw out Silver, but the hometown villian latches onto the middle ropes to prevent that from happening.

 

COLE

Silver is a former Anglemania Maineventer. And he's still pretty fresh.

 

COACH

Fresher than Blaine, I don't know how that dude is hanging in there.

 

COLE

Like we said he could win in only his third month in the company!

 

Blaine is choking Ser Pike on the ropes, looking to weaken him in preparation for an elimination. But Pike surprises him by taking him onto his left shoulder!

 

COLE

This might be it for Blaine!

 

TEN!

 

 

 

NINE!

 

 

 

EIGHT!

 

 

Blaine makes a crucial counter and uses an inverted DDT to bring down Pike!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

“SEVEN!

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

Silver is still clutched onto the ropes, but refuses to let Bohemoth have him.

 

 

“FOUR!”

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

You and I are like water and fire
Opposites only exist with each other
Dark and light give rise and turn
Are you doing alright?
Do you feel the burn?

There's nothing more dangerous than a wounded heart

There's nothing more dangerous than a wounded heart

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

 

Stripping off his shield and sword, the shredded babyface, Alexander The Brutal, makes a furious charge to the ring!

 

COLE

We saw the sexy Alexander make his mark earlier tonight in the US Title match!

 

Once he enters the ring, Alexander is assaulted by The XFL. But the tide turns quickly for The Young Wolf as a thrust kick puts him through the ropes! Simon comes next, battering Alexander's chest with chops. But even those don't do much lasting impact and Alexander overturns Simon with an exploder suplex!

 

“BRUTAL! BRUTAL! BRUTAL!”

 

COLE

What a great draw for this powerhouse stud. Number twenty five!

 

Oscar Fribeg rebounds off the ropes and decks Krista with a lariat. But as soon as he turns around Alexander connects with a big boot that hurls him out of the ring!

 

CROWD

:o

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Oscar Friberg

Entered: 17th

Eliminated: 15th

Eliminated by: Silver

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

Yo, didn't that dude just help Oscar retain the US title?

 

COLE

I think that was all about screwing over Leezus Price!

 

Silver is free of Bohemoth's grip and looks to perform a handspring elbow onto Alix. But when he comes back, Alix catches onto his hair and sends him flying over the ropes and out of the ring!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Silver is gone!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Silver

Entered: 21st

Eliminated: 16th

Eliminated by: Alix Maria Spezia

Eliminations: Baron Windels, Ned Blanchard

~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

These New Yorkers are sick. Cheering one of their own getting tossed out.

 

TEN!

 

 

“NINE!”

 

 

“EIGHT!”

 

 

“SEVEN!”

 

Bohemoth and The XFL are back brawling again!

 

 

“SIX!”

 

 

“FIVE!”

 

 

Pike hammers them both with lariats, but rather than go over the ropes they fall like large sacks to the ground.

 

 

“THREE!”

 

 

 

 

“TWO!”

 

 

 

“ONE!”

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

 

Cause I'm a badass
And you don't want to clash
Cause your mouth's writing checks that your face can't cash
Cause I'm a badass
And this warning's your last
Just cross my path and I'll drop you fast

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Badass Jack steps out from the back wearing a ferocious snarl. Steel claws are thankfully discarded and Badass jogs to the ring.

 

COLE

It was just a few years ago that Badass was one of the final two in the Rumble!

 

Badass enters the ring and boots Bohemoth in the head just he rises. The XFL meets a similar fate, taking a swift kick to the stomach. But that's all Badass can do as Pike ceases his lurking and lariats him over the ropes and out the ring!

 

“BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Badass Jack

Entered: 26th

Eliminated: 17th

Eliminated by: Ser Pike Pantera

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

COLE

The unstoppable Ser Pike Pantera claims Badass Jack!

 

Jack points a threatening finger to Pike, forcing the officials to separate Jack from the ring.

 

COLE

Alix, Blaine, Krista and Teddy those four are the marathon runners tonight.

 

COACH

And easy pickings.

 

Teddy fights off The XFL, only to get caught within a rear waistlock by Blaine. The Lion then dives backwards and hurls Buckworth overhead with a German suplex! Rather than fall to the ground, Buckworth lands in Alexander's arms. The Greek God makes an effort to pitch Buckworth over the ropes, but he hangs on and Simon makes a rescue of him!

 

COLE

Simon Singleton a hero once again!

 

COACH

Yeah, well he can't sharpshoot his way to victory here.

 

Bohemoth is using his boot to coke Krista, but is soon clobbered in the back of the head by Krista. The Beast staggers off and Krista takes to the top turnbuckle. Chicks Over Dicks work together and Alix launches her wife at Bohemoth, allowing Krista to drill him with a lariat!

 

“C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D!”

 

ALIX

Yay! Initials! It makes us look young and relevant!

 

KRISTA

I thought that's what the non invasive cosmetic treatments were for.

 

TEN!

 

 

NINE!

 

 

 

EIGHT!

 

 

SEVEN!

 

Teddy and Simon try to force Alexander over the ropes, but there's nothing do in that department.

 

 

SIX!

 

 

 

FIVE!

 

The two hot youngsters in the match, Ser Pike and Blaine duke it out with neither gaining an upperhand.

 

 

FOUR!

 

 

THREE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

ONE!

 

 

BZZZZZZZZZT!

 

Ya, You never said a word
You didn’t send me no letter
Don’t think I could forgive you

 

“BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

Logan Mann emerges wearing a Jesus Robe and a distressed look on his face. Not the expression of the savior. As the New Yorkers pelt him with jeers he makes his walk to the ring.

 

COLE

Logan failing in his quest to regain the United States title early tonight.

 

COACH

We all know what happened. Blame Alexander!

 

Logan may blame Alexander, but he sure as fuck stays away from him as he enters the ring. So rather than fight Alexander he picks off Blaine, assisting Ser Pike.

 

COLE

Ser Pike won that battle royal on HeldDOWN, eliminating Krista, and he's getting help he doesn't need.

 

COACH

Its every man for himself but get Blaine out. That dude has to be exhausted.

 

The XFL and Bohemoth are resuming their battling, both trying their hardest to take the others head off!

 

COLE

Rick Heyross has to be panicking backstage!

 

The Beast and The Young Wolf are going to war with the fans rooting for mutually assured destruction! And that's exactly what they got as Krista pushes Bohemoth over the ropes and Alix pushes The XFL! Both men tumble to outside, their fight causing their demise!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Bohemoth

Entered: 20th

Eliminated: 18th

Eliminated by: Krista Isadora Duncan

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: The Xavier Franklin Long

Entered: 24th

Eliminated: 19th

Eliminated by: Alix Maria Spezia

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

But elimination doesn't stop the battle between these two mainevent icons! No, The XFL and The Man continue their brawl on the outside!

 

COACH

These two ain't gonna quit!

 

The referees converge on Bohemoth and The XFL, desperate to stop the two men from destroying each other and ringside. There's no listening to them though, both warriors keep on slugging one another no matter what the cost!

 

COLE

We need more help out here! Its pandemonium!

 

Over on the otherside of the ring, Blaine uses a dropsault to send Logan hurtling over the ropes and out of the match!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Leezus Price is gone!

 

Logan is a shrewd costumer sometimes. And this is one of those rare times. With the referees busy ending the confrontation between Beast and Wolf, Logan knows no one has seen his defeat by Lion. As such he slinks back into the ring.

 

COLE

Wait, wait, Logan!

 

Blaine isn't expecting, Logan's return and for that reason he falls victim to being pitched to the outside! The only reason his elimination is noticed is because he crashes into a referee!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Blaine Cayley

Entered: 3rd

Eliminated: 20th

Eliminated by: Logan Mann

Eliminations: Spencer Reiger

~~~~~~~~

 

”BBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

BLAINE

What?! What?!

 

REFEREE

Blaine, you gotta go to the back.

 

BLAINE

I'm sorry, lad, you've mistaken me for someone who gives a shit.

 

The referee places a comforting hand on Blaine, which is simply unwise. Blaine winds up and decks the official with a punch!

 

“OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

 

Another referee makes the same foolish error and gets himself pitched into the ring steps!

 

COLE

Blaine, calm down! Are you crazy!

 

Hard green-gold eyes turn upon Cole. The golden flecks smolder with an unnatural fury.

 

COACH

You're on your own, b.

 

Blaine grabs hold of Cole by the shirt collar, those wild eyes boring through Cole's soul. Lucky for the announcer, Oscar is on hand to save him.

 

OSCAR

Blaine, enough.

 

BLAINE

They fucked me!

 

OSCAR

Welcome to wrestling. Let him go.

 

BLAINE

He insulted me.

 

OSCAR

He called you crazy.

 

BLAINE

I'm not crazy.

 

OSCAR

You've got a forty five year old man by the shirt collar and you're ready to kill him. That's crazy.

 

BLAINE

Arrrgh!

 

Though aggrieved and insulted, Blaine shoves Cole back into his seat. And fortunately for the rest of the world, Oscar gets him to back without incident.

 

TEN!

 

 

NINE!

 

 

 

EIGHT!

 

 

COLE

Folks, um...let's just try and keep going.

 

COACH

You alright, b?

 

COLE

Now you care?!

 

 

SEVEN!

 

 

 

SIX!

 

 

 

FIVE!

 

 

 

FOUR!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

ONE!

 

A boy of anguish now, he's a man of soul,
Traded in his misery for the lonely life of the road.
The years were cruel to him no,
He won't let them go.
Lays awake tryna' find the man inside to pack his bags and escape this world.

 

“BBOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

Attired in a padded black outfit, sharp black mask, and totally white eyes, is Leon Rodez “The Devil Inside.” Leon takes in a breath, almost sucking in the hatred of the fans, and takes to the ring.

 

COLE

This man is a murderer! He killed Clem!

 

COACH

Clem made a deal with The Devil Inside. Sorry it had to be him but better him than me!

 

Leon has an easy way into the ring with everyone currently occupied. The former world champion catches Logan off guard and manages to dump him partially over the ropes. But, Logan fights him off and Leon figures he isn't worth the fight.

 

COLE

Only two more entries left to go.

 

Over in the comer, Pike has Krista sat atop the turnbuckle. Its not a good position for Krista and Pike attacks her with a series of punches intended on knocking her over.

 

“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” the fans chant, urging Krista to fight Pike off.

 

Krista withers underneath the blows, and her elimination is dangerously close. But, Alix is on hand and starts attacking Pike!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

Alix wallops Pike with a wave of chops, which do very little to damage the monstrous boy. The Hollywood Bad Girl doesn't give up and bouncs off the ropes. But that's when Pike strikes with the gore, hitting Alix high so that he runs her over the ropes! Its a painful fall for Alix who lands in a heap on the ring mats!

 

“BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Alix Maria Spezia

Entered: 5th

Eliminated: 21st

Eliminated by: Ser Pike Pantera

Eliminations: Outlaw Cello. Tanner Neptune, Silver, The Xavier Franklin Long

~~~~~~~~

 

 

COLE

Oh my! Alix speared out of the ring by the Smoking Gun!

 

KRISTA

Grrrr...BRIE MODE!

 

CROWD

:huh:

 

KRISTA

Sorry, I don't know what just came over me.

 

Krista leaps off the top turnbuckle and smashes her knees into Pike's face with her finishing strike!

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

Lighting on Her Feet!

 

Pike is still on his feet, though wobbly from the attack. This is of no problem for Krista who leaps into him and curses him with a KIDology. This is the fatal blow for the dark knight as he teeters backwards and topples out of the ring!
 

”YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

He's gone! He's gone! Ser Pike is gone!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Ser Pike Pantera

Entered: 19th

Eliminated: 22nd

Eliminated by: Krista Isadora Duncan

Eliminations: Badass Jack, Alix Maria Spezia

~~~~~~~~

 

We cut backstage to find King Landon overturning a coffee table and all the refreshments on it! Queen Esther tries to calm him and is violently shouted down by the King.

 

COLE

He's lost it, Coach.

 

COACH

Can you blame him? Ser Pike was Krista's biggest obstacle to Anglemania.

 

TEN!

 

 

 

NINE!

 

 

 

EIGHT!

 

There's no rest for Krista as she's accosted by Simon Singleton

 

 

SEVEN!

 

 

 

SIX!

 

 

 

FIVE!

 

 

Krista fights off Simon and the yells at Teddy for not controlling his partner.

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

ONE!

 

"I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!"

 

“YYYEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”

 

COLE

At number twenty nine the 24/7 Champion! Alright!

 

Rather than hold his title Tony Tourettes holds a protest sign “I SHULD BEN N LEFAL BAN!”

 

COACH

Wut.

 

Tony enters with sign in hand. Tony gets signed snatched out of hand by Leon. Tony gets sign bashed over head by Leon. Tony gets thrown out of match my Leon. The end.

 

“BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Tony Tourettes

Entered: 29th

Eliminated: 23rd

Eliminated by: Leon Rodez

Eliminations: None

~~~~~~~~

 

COACH

That idiot missed the Lethal Bang for that! BWHHAHAAHAAHHA!

 

No one much cares for Tony's affairs and the battle rages on. Leon picks up the remnants of Tony's sign and uses them to choke Krista.

 

COLE

No love between those two.

 

Teddy is catching a much needed break in the corner, while Simon, Alexander and Logan each take turns pounding on one another.

 

COLE

Krista and Teddy have been in this match the longest, entering at numbers nine and ten. Their next closest entrant? Simon at a very fresh twenty two.

 

Leon feels that he's rid himself of the Krista menace once and for all as he pitches her over the ropes. But, Miss California shows amazing strength by catching onto the middle rope with one arm and using that to pull herself to safety!

 

COLE

Oh my!

 

COACH

DAYUM~! Baby girl got strength!

 

Leon is not pleased and attacks Krista, clobbering her to the ground. He then uses his boot to try and shove her out of the ring, but Krista refuses to be eliminated!

 

“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!”

 

Leon finally gives up and goes elsewhere, allowing Krista a moment of rest.

 

TEN!

 

 

NINE!

 

COLE

Here comes the last man!

 

 

EIGHT!

 

 

SEVEN!

 

 

Leon and Simon fire off shots, with neither man gaining an advantage.

 

 

SIX!

 

 

 

FIVE!

 

 

 

FOUR!

 

 

Logan clings onto the ropes, refusing to let Alexander eliminated him.

 

 

THREE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

ONE!

 

 

BZZZZZZZZZZZZT

 

Time will destroy everything

Time will destroy everything

Time will destroy everything

Time will destroy everything

 

Oh, the world is rough

It's just like hoping it will swallow you right up

And know that you're awake

The clock is ticking and it won't stop, it don't stop

 

COLE

Oh no.

 

 

The lights go down~!

 

 

COACH

Oh no~!

 

And when they come up, Ivar stands in the center of the ring.

 

IVAR

Now we begin.

 

Now we begin SYN! I shall summarize the events of the rumble from this point on! Ivar latches onto both of Teddy and Simon's neck and uses that deadly grip to turn them over the ropes for a double elimination!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Teddy Buckworth

Entered: 10th

Eliminated: 24th

Eliminated by: Ivar The Cunning

Eliminations: Brock Ausstin

~~~~~~~~

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Simon Singleton

Entered: 22nd

Eliminated: 25th

Eliminated by: Ivar The Cunning

Eliminations: Brock Ausstin

~~~~~~~~

 

Fuckery and mayhem ensue as EGGTHER leaps the guardrail and eliminates an unsuspecting Leon Rodez!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Leon Rodez

Entered: 29th

Eliminated: 26th

Eliminated by: Eggther?

Eliminations: Tony Tourettes

~~~~~~~~

 

~~~~~~

Final Four:

Logan Mann, Ivar The Cunning, Krista Isadora Duncan, Alexander

~~~~~~~~

 

The battle wages hot and violent with every man and woman going for a wild attack. Alexander seemingly has Logan out of the match, but Ivar comes and lariats Alexander out of the ring!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Alexander

Entered: 25th

Eliminated: 27th

Eliminated by: Ivar The Cunning

Eliminations: Tony Tourettes

~~~~~~~~

 

And how does Logan repay Ivar for saving his ass? Why he backdrops him out of the ring, of course!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Ivar The Cunning

Entered: 30th

Eliminated: 28th

Eliminated by: Logan Mann

Eliminations: Simon Singleton, Teddy Buckworth, Alexander

~~~~~~~~

 

This left Logan alone with Krista. Not the best situation for one to be in. And when one considers Krista's long standing hatred of Logan well....

 

Logan spends a good time running from Krista, which isn't conducive to a battle royal. But he actually manages to lower the ropes and sends Krista flying onto the apron! Thinking he has her beat, Logan charges in....and gets hip tossed over the ropes and out of the ring!

 

~~~~~~

Eliminated: Logan Mann

Entered: 27th

Eliminated: 29th

Eliminated by: Krista Isadora Duncan

Eliminations: Blaine Cayley, Ivar The Cunning

~~~~~~~~

 

~~~~~~

WINNER!

Krista Isadora Duncan

Entered: 9th

Eliminations: Logan Mann, Daisuke, Ser Pike, Chick, Bohemoth,

~~~~~~~~

 

Post-match Krista celebrates with the fans, who delights in her record third Lethal Rumble win. But, for Krista the greatest joy comes from seeing King Landon on the Angletron, curled into a fetal position and cursing like a drunk sailor.

 

 

FIN

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