OAOAST IntenseZone - 5/27/02, A special memorial day edition...

[Chanel #99]

Treble-Charged is arguing with someone in a different room…

TC: What do you mean I have to wear the dress?

Voice: You're the women's champion right

TC: Yeah, but that's only because I'm proving why men are superior to women

Voice: Then you can prove you look better in a dress too

TC: But

Voice: That's FINAL!

The door swings shut onto TC's face. He curses and slings the spaghetti-strap dress over his shoulder and storms off. The camera pans back to the door label: Commissioner

New Opening Montage! Fire sparkles out from the corners of the screen as Prodigy's FireStarter blares. We see AngleSault falling, BPP tapping, a shadowy figure, the aWo posing, the Zack Attack, Jingus staring, Eskimo sledding, The Deadly Alliance in the ring, another shadowy figure, Alfdogg holding the IC title, the DoD, Greenmist and Dreamer having problems, EF winning the HardKore title, and the picture explodes!

[Chanel #99]

Backstage, The Ultra-Expensive Custom In Crowd Limo pulls up. Michael Cole steps out, walks over and lets out EvenflowDDT and Alison.

Alison:I just don't like how you paraded me out there, in front of all those people, instead of just going to my brother in private. I feel like such a fool, like you were just using me for cheap sympathy.

Evenflow:Relax, you know I love you, and if it wasn't for that punk Alfdogg it would've gone perfect. Now, if you could just do something like that for him tonight...

Alison:Weren't you listening to what I just said? Ugh... I can't believe you sometimes! I'll see you after the show.

Alison turns to leave, then comes back and kisses Evenflow::

Alison:Please don't hurt yourself or my brother. Good luck.

Alison heads for the women's locker room.

Evenflow (calling after her):Hey, I don't need any luck! I'm the richer, tougher, smarter, and better looking man, and I'll do whatever it takes to retain!

Evenflow(to himself):Such a beautiful girl... but sometimes her lower-class roots really show.

Evenflow turns around and is surprised to bump into Sandman9000

EvenflowWhat the hell do you want? You're too late, Alison already left, and you're too early, I'm not going to beat you down until we're in the ring!

Sandman:Listen, dude, chill. I just wanted to let you know that I feel really terrible for shoving my sister. As much as I can't believe she's happy with scum like you, I don't want her to get hurt, so I came to you to ask her not to come to ring-side for tonight's match.

Evenflow:You're not only jealous of me for being richer, tougher, smarter, and better looking than you, but you're also afraid of your own sister interfering? What a pussy!

Sandman gets really angry, but calms himself

Sandman:That's not what I said at all. Listen, no matter what happens, it ends here. It's already going to hurt Alison enough to see you seriously injured and in tears from losing the title. I don't want to have to see her cry over what I've done to you ever again... after tonight.

Sandman turns to leave. Evenflow clotheslines him in the back.

Evenflow:I admire your delusions of grandeur. Unlike the heartbreak if anything would happen to me, Alison doesn't care what I do to you! You're right, it ends here, but not out of your "kindness", but because I'm going to cripple you!

Evenflow spits on the fallen Sandman and walks away

[Chanel #99]

We are live Philadelphia for INTENSEzone! Camera pans to show a sold-out First Union Center! The pyro explodes on the stage!

"Simply Ravishing" fires up and Tony the Body makes his way down to the ring. As always, Tony is decked out in fashion and boas. He grabs a mic.

Tony: Ladies and Gentlemen of Philadelphia! *Crowd Cheers* Welcome to INTENSEzone, the premier show of the OaOasT. Tonight I'm out here to give a very important announcement about the Great Angle Bash. Three new matches have been signed, and the very first Tag Team Champions will be decided at the Great Angle Bash.

Tony:In the first contest, the aWo's very own CWM and Some Guy *Crowd chants aWo! AWo!* will take on wrestling's odd couple, TrebleCharged and The Mystery Eskimo *Sign in crowd 'Treble Charger Sucks'*

Tony:In the second match, the In-Crowd *booooo* will take on the Deadly Alliance *bigger boos*. The winners of both matches will fight later on in the night to determine…

"Treble Charger, Brand New Low" hits and TC comes out in a lovely black spaghetti strap dress!

TC: Excuse me, but is there even a question that The Odd Couple will be in the finals? *Crowd: NO!*

TC enters the ring…

TC: So Tony, you're through with your little announcement. I am out here to entertain…grah!

Tony the Body decks TC with a right, whips TC into the ropes, and hits the OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE!

Tony: And that's how Philly treats men in drag! *Crowd pops.* Now if you'll excuse me, I have some important business to attend to.

[Chanel #99]

Jingus/MarioLogan vs. Dreamer420/Greenmist

Tag Team Match, One Fall, 15 minute time limit

A clip are shown of Jingus and MarioLogan arguing after their HeldDown match, followed by another clip of Greenmist misting Dreamer 420

Ave Satani begins to play, MarioLogan leads Jingus out and into the ring…the two appear to be discussing strategy.

Redman/Method Man, Da Rock Wilder hits and Dreamer420 comes out with a stoned expression. He shuffles on down to the ring and enters…Jingus attacks, and the bell rings!

Alice in Chains, Hey plays and the crowd pops as GreenMist comes running down to get into his corner. Jingus with a pickup and slam on Dreamer. Another pickup, but Dreamer squirms out and hits a superkick to gain the advantage!

Jingus wobbles, and Dreamer hits in with the elbows…There's a whip, and another superkick puts the monster down…Dreamer with the cover, but Jingus powers out at 1.

Dreamer whips Jingus into his team's corner, and tags Greenmist in. Green with chops galore on the behemoth, and sends Jingus into the ropes. Green goes for a handspring elbow, but Jingus caches him into a Full-Nelson Slam! Jingus rolls over to Mario and tags him in.

Mario springs over the top rope and hits a running dropkick on ole Misty. With Green down in the neutral corner, Mario scales up and tries to hit THE LEGDROP THAT WON'T HIT! Needless to say, it doesn't hit as Greenmist rolls out of the way. Both men up with punches, but Greenmist ducks the third and hits a standing dropkick! Mario scampers back to tag in Jingus, and as Greenmist goes for the tag, Dreamer ducks away.

Jingus jumps over Mario and nails Green with a running clothesline. He whips Jingus across and hits a running knee lift, but trips on a still-recovering Mario and flips over the top rope. Mario thinks he was tagged in!

Mario pulls himself up and swings for a punch, but out of nowhere, Greenmist dodges and hits a desperation BRAINBUSTER. He covers for the 1…2…3! Greenmist rolls out of the cover, and feels the pain of Dreamer's SHOOTING STAR PRESS! Dreamer points to himself and leaves the ring…Mario and Jingus argue on the outside. Greenmist coughs up blood and the ref signals for the EMT's.

Your Winner, by pinfall, Greenmist and Dreamer420!

[Chanel #99]

Yesterday, at an undisclosed hospital, the aWo visited Anglesault and consol their fallen leader.

CWM: Feeling allright buddy?

AngleSault: Fellas, they've got me really high on painkillers now, so I need to be brief.

CWM, SomeGuy, you fellas need to practice, and practice more. The aWo deserves those Tag Team titles, so you guys go and get them.

Big, all of us are counting on you to challenge Big Zit Poppin Popick next week. Do your best.

AP, make sure Popick gets what he deserves.

For all of you, win. Do it for me, do it for the aWo. Do it, because the fans *crowd pops* in Philly *crowd pops* believe in you. Remember, this is the city of champions, and we're the best champions there are. Go fellas, go and make me proud.

[Chanel #99]

CWM vs. TrebleCharged vs. Zack Malibu vs. Big Poppa Popick

Fatal Fourway, 1st pinfall wins, 20 minute time limit[/]

Nirvana, Smells Like Teen Spirit blares and CobainWasMurdered walks down to the ring, making a belt motion over stomach. He hits the aWo salute on the turnbuckle, and the arena darkens…

Treble Charger, Brand New Low fires up and TrebleCharged comes ringside. He stares at CWM and rolls under the bottom rope. CWM with boots and kicks to TC, and he goes for the early pin, but he only gets a 1-count.

Saved by the Bell rings and Zack Malibu appears on stage. He saunters to ringside but doesn't get in his corner. Meanwhile, TC gets in an eyerake and a hard shot to CWM's back, laying him down on the mat. TC goes for the early pin, but Zack grabs CWM's leg and puts it on the ropes. TC comes to argue with Zack, which allows CWM to splash Zack from behind!

[Darude, Sandstorm[/] plays and Big Poppa Popick comes out to a very negative reaction. Several members of the audience throw trash his way, but he walks with a smirk. High Five to Zack, and the two men take their respective corners.

CWM, already having the advantage, places TC's head on the second rope, and hits a running leg-drop from behind. TC flops back into the ring and crawls to BPP's corner, but CWM steps on TC's dress to prevent that tag. CWM up and down with a legdrop in the middle of the ring. He sets up for the TEENSPIRIT LEGDROP, but as he lands TC rolls away. CWM lands badly and TC rushes to tag in BPP.

Shouldertackle to the leg of CWM by BPP. One middle finger later, CWM finds himself in the Sharpshooter, but CWM manages to reach the ropes and the ref breaks the hold. BPP with lefts to CWM's jaw, and whips CWM into the ropes. CWM dodges, but BPP dodges CWM's counter and hits a sleeper-drop. BPP tags in Zack.

Zack with a couple slaps while BPP distracts the ref. It backfires though, as CWM hits the low blow to even the odds. Zack lies in the middle of the ring writhing in pain, but crawls over to tag in TC.

TC races over and nails BPP with a clothesline, sending BPP to the mat. He hits Zack with another for good measure, and follows up with the Toronto Maple-Leaf! But Zack was too close to the ropes, so the ref breaks that hold too…

TC throws Zack into CWM's corner..the two double team, and Zack is whipped to the opposite side as it looks like CWM and TC are setting up for the 3D! Zack back and launches the Zack Attack in Desperation! CWM ducks, but TC gets hit full in the face and is knocked from the ring!

CWM and Zack exchange punches in the middle of the ring. Zack tries to whip CWM into a neutral corner, but CWM reverses and whips Zack into BPP's corner. An errant BPP was too close to the turnbuckle and gets knocked off by Zack's impact…Zack wobbles around to get the POLLYcutter! Ref counts…1…2…3!

Your winner, by pinfall, CobainWasMurdered

The Mystery Eskimo comes ringside to help his partner back up the ramp… TC sees BPP laid out, and rips off his spaghetti-strap dress and throws it on top of BPP. Zack tries to help BPP up but the two start to argue about what happened. They continue up the ramp, unhappy with the outcome.

[Chanel #99]

Meanwhile, Backstage in the Locker Room…

The camera is focused on Sandman in the locker room. Sandman is sitting in a chair in the corner, holding his mop. His head is down and all is silent. Sandman looks up and at the camera

Sandman: So, it has now come down to this. A no-rope barbed wire ladder match. Something even I haven’t done. And even though it is for your belt, the belt is secondary. We are not fighting for a piece of gold that will be excommunicated in a couple of weeks. We are fighting for pride. To show who is the better man. Ah, fuck that.

Sandman: Evenflow, we are having this match because you are a dumb shit, plain and simple. I have told you from the beginning, that Zack was the one who attacked you in the rumble. He is going to turn on you, Evenflow. Plain and simple, he will stab you in the back when you are most vulnerable. Since you haven’t seemed to realize that yet, I need to reinforce the lesson.

Sandman: Buuuuuuuut, now you bring in my sister and now say that she loves you. First off, just because she has the same DNA as I do and we came from the same mother, doesn’t mean that we are close. When I grew up fighting in the streets, it was often to defend her. Some older boy would want her to turn tricks for him, and it was up to big brother to knock the guys ass out. Most of the time, it involved me getting my ass kicked. She never really did thank me for everything I did for her. And when she turned sixteen, she met up with some college guy who had a convertible. Showed her a hundred dollar bill and a bong. That was five years ago. Last Thursday, as I was slowly squeezing the life out of you, was the first time I have seen her in five years. And she hasn’t changed.

Sandman: Evenflow, do you think she loves you? Of course not, since you don’t love her either. She is using you for the money and fame, and you are using her for the sex and to piss me off. Well, your only getting one of the two, ain’t ya? As soon as you get tired of her, or vice versa, you’ll break up. This isn’t permanent. And when that happens, she’ll run back to big brother, to fight her battles for her. Only, this time, it won’t happen.

Sandman: This is it, Evenflow. This is the type of match where people change. I know you don’t like to get hurt badly, Evenflow. And we both are going to get hurt badly. We are both going to sweat, bleed, and break ourselves in half. And I am going to enjoy it the whole time.

Sandman: See, when I say that Hardcore is for pussies, I didn’t just say that because you have the belt. The word “hardcore” used to mean something. It meant those who went above and beyond what was to be expected. Those who took a chair shot head on rather then block it. Those who would crash through tables and enjoy it. Those who had no problem having their skin punctured by tacks and barbed wire and nails and lightbulbs. But then “hardcore” became a joke. It became an excuse for comedy, to have twenty title changes in five minutes. That’s when I turned to Deathcore. Those who go above and beyond the call of hardcore. That’s why we are not having just a ladder match, or just a no-rope barbed wire match. We are combining the two, in something that has never been done before. This is what Hell is going to be like. I know I am going to Hell, and most likely you will too.

Sandman:I’m going to sum this up so even you can understand it. I’m going to hurt you. I’m will break you. And if Alison gets in the way, and you better make sure that it doesn’t happen, I cannot guarantee her safety. I already know your ass-mashing buddies are going to get involved, and I have them taken care of. But the belt will be mine.

[Chanel #99]

Superstar vs. Bif Everchad

Singles Match: Stipulation: aWo and In-Crowd barred from ringside

Bif comes out through the crowd, throwing copies of his latest movie "You Only Die Twice" to fans along the way. He swings into the ring and saunters, awaiting his opponent.

Saliva, Superstar bellows through the arena as The SuperStar is greeted by a chorus of boos. Superstar with the unsurprising flip-off, and he enters the ring.

Lockup, and Superstar powers Bif down…He lays in the boots to Bif's midsection, finally picking Bif up but hitting a gutwrencher! Superstar with the COCKY PIN! But Bif easily kicks out at 1.

Bif up and tries to hit Superstar with a chop, but the chop misses and SuperStar hits one of his own, followed by several more. Bif's chest is red. SuperStar hits a SuperSuplex, and hangs on to hit another one! Superstar is controlling this match!

SuperStar poses, and Bif gets a rollup for a quick 2, but no more. Superstar with a running knee strike, but Bif dodges! Finally, Bif gets some offense in. He hits Superstar with rights and lefts, and whips SS across the mat, Bif grabs a copy of his latest movie, and meets SuperStar with a flying Tape Shot! SuperStar looks out, and Big signals to the top rope.

Bif takes his time to pose, which proves to be a mistake. SuperStar lunges for the ropes and the imbalance causes Bif to crotch himself.

With Bif on the top-rope. SuperStar Scales as well. It looks like he is goint to hit a Superplex…but SuperStar places Bif's head in between his legs! SS points to the announce table, and picks Bif up and Power-Bombs him off the ring and through the table! The area is destroyed, and the ref immediately rings the bell. EMT's rush ringside as Bif is heard saying he can't feel his legs.

Your winner, by Ref's Decision, The SuperStar!

[Chanel #99]

Evenflow DDT vs. Sandman

HardKore Title Match, Stipulation: No-Rope Barbed Wire Ladder Match

We are joined for this bout by JR and Tony the Body, who have taken ringside positions to commentate on the biggest main event in INTENSEzone history!

“Five Minutes Alone” hits as Sandman9000 makes his way out to the ring. Showing that he is not afraid of anything, Sandman walks directly underneath the eight-foot ladder. As Sandman slides under the bottom strands of barbed wire into the ring, he catches the back of his shirt on the ropes. Frustrated, Sandman takes his torn-up shirt off and tosses it into the crowd.

JR-“Bah Gawd! Sandman just got rid of his shirt! He’s topless, Tony! There is no protection between him and that barbed wire!”

Tony- “That’s because he is an idiot, JR. He is so obsessed with this “Deathcore” crap that he is going to kill himself before he hurts anyone else. And that is good, since it will make for an easy victory for Evenflow, and Evenflow will never have to deal with this moron again.”

“Here Comes The Money” hits as EvenflowDDT comes out, flanked by Zack Malibu and The SuperStar. Evenflow is without his Hardcore Title, as he surrendered it earlier in the day. It is now hanging fifteen feet above the ring.

Evenflow seems hesitant to get into the ring. He makes motions to enter the ring, but squirms away when he comes near the wire. The In-Crowd huddles together.

JR-“Well, is he going to get into the ring or not?”

Tony-“He’s being smart, JR. No sense in doing something stupid, especially when you are the champion. Take your time and let your opponent make a mistake.”

After a brief huddle, Zack grabs the ladder and sets it up next to the ring. SuperStar and Zack hold the ladder while Evenflow climbs to the top. After posing for a photo-op and hearing the boos of the crowd, Evenflow jumps over the wire and into the ring.

As the two competitors circle the ring, Zack starts to climb the ladder. The ref rushes over and stops Zack from entering the ring, then throws both Zack and SuperStar out!

JR-“The official just had the In Crowd removed from ringside!”

Tony-“First, Evenflow has to be in this kind of a match, then he has his support group removed. Is there any way that the odds can be stacked more against him?”

The official, after moving the ladder back to its original spot, signals for the bell to be rung.

JR-“Here we go folks! The first ever No Rope Barbed Wire Ladder Match in OAOAST history is underway!”

Sandman starts towards Evenflow, but Evenflow backs away every time. It continues for about twenty seconds, with Sandman approaching and Evenflow retreating, until Evenflow is back into a corner. Desperate, Evenflow goes for an eyepoke, but Sandman catches the hand. Grinning, Sandman starts to open up on Evenflow.

After a series of right, Sandman whips Evenflow towards the barbed wire. Evenflow, smartly, throws himself to the ground. He starts to roll towards the outside, but is hesitant to get near the barbed wire. Evenflow stands up and a stand-off occurs.

As Sandman approaches, Evenflow forces him into a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Evenflow works it into an armbar, then turns it into a wristlock. Sandman reverses, but Evenflow is able to counter and take Sandman to the mat with a headlock takeover. Evenflow applies a chinlock as the bloodthirsty crowd boos.

Tony-“See, Evenflow is being smart. He knows he can’t brawl with Sandman, especially in this environment, so he going to remove Sandman from his game. This is Evenflow’s match right now.”

[Chanel #99]

After holding the chinlock for thirty seconds, Evenflow brings Sandman up to a standing headlock. Evenflow goes to take Sandman over in another headlock takeover, but Sandman blocks and hits a belly-to-back suplex. As Evenflow bounces back onto his feet, Sandman takes him down with a running leg lariat.

JR-“Business might be ready to pick up!”

As Evenflow staggers near the barbed wire, Sandman nails a couple of right hands. Taking a couple of steps back, Sandman throws a big clothesline which Evenflow ducks. Sandman stops before hitting the barbed wire, but Evenflow shoves Sandman back-first into the barbed wire! Sandman screams in pain as the crowd gasps.

JR-“And Sandman is the first to taste that heinous barbed wire! It’s cutting into his bare back!”

With Sandman stuck, Evenflow punches Sandman in the face. Evenflow pulls Sandman out of the wire, only to shove Sandman back into the wire again! Evenflow again frees Sandman, whose back is punctured and starting to turn red. Evenflow hooks Sandman up for a suplex, but drop Sandman stomach-first across the barbed wire! The crowd screams while Sandman tries to fall back into the ring.

Tony-“See! Evenflow isn’t scared! He’s taking the fight directly to that sick sonofabitch, and he’s winning! Evenflow isn’t the Hardcore champion because of dumb luck! He’s damn tough!”

Evenflow pulls Sandman off the barbed wire and back into the ring. After a kick to the stomach, Evenflow backs up, looking for a knee lift. As Evenflow charges, Sandman moves and throws Evenflow towards the barbed wire! Or tries to, as Evenflow dives OVER the wire, to the outside of the ring!

JR-“Evenflow just barely saved himself there!”

Tony-“Dumb luck. Sandman got lucky, but it was SKILL that Evenflow used to save himself. Heads up JR!”

As Tony says that, Sandman jumps over the barbed wire as well with a somersault plancha, nailing Evenflow. Both men are down on the outside of the ring. Sandman is up first, but Evenflow counters and tosses Sandman over the guardrail, into the crowd.

JR-“What the hell is this? It’s a ladder match, not falls count anywhere!”

As Sandman and Evenflow brawl through the crowd, heading towards the stage, both men throw each other into the hockey barriers. They make their way to the stage area, where Evenflow whips Sandman into the guardrail, only to be backdroped over and into the stage area. Sandman hops onto the guardrail, and comes off with a clothesline. Sandman then starts digging around under the stage, and pulls out a table with 15 lightbulbs taped onto it!

Tony-“What the hell is this! This isn’t a lightbulb match! Why the hell does he have that damned table?”

Sandman sets the table over perpendicular to the stage, then grabs Evenflow and forces him onto the stage. On the stage, Sandman hits a bodyslam and a legdrop.

JR-“That stage is about ten feet off the ground. It’s a nasty fall, especially if you hit that lightbulb table.”

Sandman leads Evenflow towards the end of the stage, near the lightbulb table, but SuperStar rushes out from the entrance way and attacks Sandman from behind.

Tony-“That is the brilliance of Zack Malibu and the In Crowd! See, just because they are barred from ringside doesn’t mean they can’t attack on the stage! Tremendous! And now Sandman is going to get what he deserves!”

SuperStar and Evenflow start clubberin’ Sandman, to the boos of the crowd. They try to pick the challenger up, but Sandman is too much dead weight for them. After softening Sandman up some more, the two In Crowd members finally have Sandman on his feet. They prepare Sandman for a double hiptoss off the stage onto the lightbulb table, but Sandman is able to counter with elbows. SuperStar goes for a Ghetto Blaster, but misses and nails Evenflow upside the head. Sandman hits SuperStar with a kick to the stomach, then bring him over to the end of the stage and sets him up in a powerbomb position as the crowd pops.

JR-“No! Bah Gawd Sandman, don’t do it!”

[Chanel #99]

With Sandman stuck in the barbed wire, Evenflow takes the opportunity to set the ladder back up under the belt and start climbing. As he makes it to the fifth rung, Sandman frees himself, and starts climbing underneath Evenflow. Sandman manages to get Evenflow sitting on his shoulders, and falls off the ladder, with Evenflow going back-first into the barbed wire! Evenflow screams in pain as his shirt is completely ripped to shreads.

Sandman opens up both chairs next to each other, but sees that Evenflow is in a bad way, so Sandman starts to climb the ladder. Evenflow is still fighting, however, and starts to climb the other side. Both men are on the fifth rung of the eight-foot ladder, until Evenflow hits a hiptoss off the ladder, through both chairs!

Tony-“Evenflow will never quit on you. He is a fighter, a person who would rather die then surrender.”

With Sandman down, Evenflow knows that he is going to have to soften the challenger up more. Evenflow props the ladder up against the barbed wire, then throws Sandman into the ladder. However, Sandman and the ladder go tumbling to the outside, leaving Evenflow with no way to reach the belt!

Frustrated, Evenflow is stuck in the ring, bleeding out of his face and back, and is hesistant to get near the barbed wire. However, Evenflow remembers that officials always have wire cutters in this kind of match. Evenflow demands the wire cutters from the official at ringside, then uses them to cut down the barbed wire on one side of the ring, the side that had the strand snap earlier. As Evenflow is cutting down the wire, Sandman grabs a lightbulb from under the ring and nails Evenflow in the back with it! Evenflow tumbles over the wire and out of the ring, with half of the barbed wire cut off the ringpost.

With both men on the outside, Sandman stomps on Evenflow. Taking the wire cutters, Sandman cuts down the rest of the barbed wire, leaving one side with no fencing; free of barbed wire. Sandman takes a strand of the barbed wire and wraps it around his mop, then rakes it along Evenflow’s back! As Evenflow screams in pain, Sandman starts to beat Evenflow with the barbed wire mop. Sandman then throws the ladder back into the ring.

Sandman sets the ladder up, but near the empty portion of the ring, not under the belt. Sandman climbs up the ladder, and makes it up to the sixth rung before Evenflow makes it back to his feet. Seeing Sandman way above him, Evenflow quickly slides into the ring. Before Sandman can reposition himself on the ladder, Evenflow tips the ladder over, sending Sandman crashing into the guardrail on the outside!

Tony-“I hope Sandman cracked his fool head open! What is he thinking, going for such a stupid move when he could go for the belt.”

Evenflow sets the ladder underneath the belt and starts climbing as well. As Evenflow makes it up to the sixth rung and is within reaching distance of the belt, Sandman makes it up to his feet. His nose broken, Sandman can barely see, but is able to spot Evenflow on the ladder, about to grab the belt. In desperation, Sandman grabs his mop and throws it at Evenflow. The mop catches Evenflow on the side of the head, knocking Evenflow off the ladder and chest first into the barbed wire!

JR-“And now Evenflow goes bare-chested into that unforgiving wire, which does not taste like mah BBQ sauce!”

Tony-“Would you stop with those BBQ sauce comments already! For the love of God, you DRINK the stuff during these broadcasts!”

Evenflow tries to free himself from the wire, but starts screaming about how one of his nipples is caught in the wire. Sandman takes the opportunity to set the table up in the corner and nail Evenflow from behind with the barbed wire mop. Sandman pulls Evenflow free of the barbed wire, with blood coming out of Evenflow’s nipple. Sandman looks like he is setting Evenflow up for the EdgeCrusher through the table, but Evenflow is able to knee Sandman in the stomach. Evenflow spins around, hooks Sandman, bring Sandman into the Gory Guerrero Special position, and drives Sandman neck-first through the bridged table with the SoCal Suburban Angst!

JR-“That’s the same damn thing that Evenflow did to Sandman back at AngleSlam! Damn near broke Sandman’s neck!”

Tony-“I hope Evenflow did this time, since these guys need to end this match quickly. And if a guy can’t feel his legs, he can’t climb a ladder, can he?”

[Chanel #99]

Both men, after being down for close to 45 seconds, start to stir at the same time. With the ladder still set up in the middle of the ring, both guys start towards it. However, Evenflow grabs Sandman and tries to whip him into the ladder, but the whip is reversed and Evenflow ends up going back first into the barbed wire! Knocking the ladder out of the way, Sandman moves to the other side of the ring, rotating his right shoulder and warming it up. As the crowd begins to pop, Sandman rushes forward and nails Evenflow with the Killshot, sending both men tumbling over the barbed wire, out of the ring. However, Evenflow has his pants stuck on the wire, and is handing upside down!

Sandman punches the dangling Evenflow before the wire snaps and Evenflow falls to ringside. The challenger picks up the In Crowd member and tosses him over the guardrail, into the crowd. Sandman follows as Evenflow starts retreating from the ring.

Tony-“Now where the hell are they going?”

Sandman and Evenflow brawl until they reach the bottom of a balcony. Evenflow tries to stop and lead Sandman back to the ring, but Sandman hammers Evenflow from behind and starts dragging the champion up the stairs, heading for the top of the balcony!

JR-“Good God almighty! That’s gotta be about a 50 or 60 foot balcony!”

Tony-“Dammit JR, I’m sick of your hyperbole. Can’t you get your heights straight? That’s probably only about a 30 foot balcony.”

Sandman and Evenflow make their way up the stairs, and reach the top of the balcony. Suddenly, Zack Malibu attacks out of nowhere! He hits a School’s Out on Sandman, knocking the challenger down. Zack hands an object to Evenflow before the two celebrate, as Zack heads down the stairs.

JR-“What did Zack give Evenflow? What are those two planning?”

Tony-“They are planning to win this match, JR! This is why the In-Crowd will reign supreme over Sandman! They actually think and use strategy, instead of foolish tactics!”

At the bottom of the balcony, Zack has workers construct three tables in a pyramid form. At the top, Evenflow brings Sandman up to a standing position and is taunting the towel boy. Out of nowhere, Sandman awakens and starts opening up on Evenflow, knocking the champion dangerously close to the end of the balcony! Sandman hooks Evenflow up for an EdgeCrusher, but Evenflow floats over and hits a Pillow Made O’ Concrete instead. The crowd boos as the workers finish constructing the table pyramid.

JR-“What are those two planning! And why are Sandman and Evenflow on that balcony? Those two are crazier then pet coons in an insane asylum!”

Tony-“Quiet, JR, the In Crowd is going to finish Sandman off once and for all!”

However, the workers immediately flee the balcony, as an object steps out of the shadows! Zack looks at the running workers, then turns around to see what they were scared off. Zack screams like a girl and falls down.

JR-“It’s JINGUS! Bah Gawd, it’s JINGUS!”

JINGUS grabs Zack’s head, engulfing it in his massive paw, and delivers a nasty claw slam. As Evenflow looks on stunned, JINGUS presses Zack over his head and places Zack on the top table.

On top of the balcony, Evenflow looks on in disbelief. Sandman spins Evenflow around and hits him in the stomach with a chair. Sandman tosses the chair to Evenflow, who catches it, and eats the chair as Sandman nails a Yakuza kick! With Evenflow down, Sandman makes his way to the edge of the balcony, as the fans begin to cheer. JR-“OH MAH GAWD! HE’S GONNA JUMP!”

Tony-“Don’t do it! For the love of God Sandman, don’t do it!”

Sandman turns his back to the balcony, his heels hanging over the edge, his arms raised above his head. With the entire crowd screaming and yelling, Sandman leaps and pulls off two forward flips before smashing through Zack and the tables!

JR-“OH MAH GOD! OH MAH GAWD! OH MAH GAWD! PHANTISMO DESTRUCTO OFF THE BALCONY THROUGH ZACK MALIBU AND THREE TABLES! WITH GAWD AS MY WITNESS, BOTH MEN ARE BROKEN IN HALF!”

Tony-“Someone call 911! Get some medical help out here! Zack Malibu is seriously injured, Sandman is probably dead, and Evenflow needs some medical attention!”

[Chanel #99]

As the workers return to check on both men, replays are shown of Sandman’s insane stunt, from various angles and in slow motion.

On top of the balcony, Evenflow crawls over to the edge and takes in the carnage. Furious, Evenflow grabs the chair and throws it off the balcony, nailing JINGUS square in the back of the head! JINGUS falls to the ground, unconscious.

JR-“And Evenflow just threw a chair off the balcony and nailed that hoss JINGUS in the head! I think he actually knocked JINGUS out!”

Tony-“I’m speechless. After what we have just seen, I don’t think words can describe it.”

Evenflow makes his way down the stairs as Sandman begins to stir in the wreckage of the Pyramid of Hell. Grabbing a fan’s camcorder, Evenflow smashes it against Sandman’s head! Despite bleeding badly from the face, back, and nipple, Evenflow picks up Sandman in a fireman’s position and carries him through the crowd, heading back to the ring.

Back at ringside, Evenflow despoits the hurt Sandman into the ring. Grabbing some of the loose barbed wire, Evenflow wraps it around a chair and enters the ring. As Sandman tries to get to all fours, Evenflow starts to smash the barbed wire chair against the back of Sandman, again and again. Sandman rolls out of the ring to avoid the punishment.

Evenflow follows and beats on Sandman with the barbed wire chair more. Stopping, Evenflow grabs the wire cutters and digs them into the Sandman’s forehead. After a disturbing amount of blood begins to flow, Evenflow cuts down another section of barbed wire, from where he had hung by his pants before. After cutting down the entire section, only two sides of the ring, opposite from each other, have barbed wire. The other two are completely bare!

JR-“I do not like where this is going.”

Tony-“And you think I do?”

Evenflow pulls a table out of the ring and wraps it in barbed wire. He places the table next to the ring on a side that has no barbed wire. Grabbing some lightbulbs out from under the ring, Evenflow stuffs the table with about eight bulbs, before smashing two over Sandman’s back!

Evenflow throws Sandman into the ring and sets him up to go through the table, but Sandman falls down every time. After three attempts, Sandman falls out of the ring on the opposite side, one with no barbed wire. Evenflow shrugs and sets the ladder up under the belt and begins to climb.

Tony-“He’s going to do it! I told you, JR, I told the world that Evenflow was going to win, and now he is going to do it!”

As Evenflow makes it to the sixth rung, Sandman crawls back into the ring with another ladder, this one already wrapped in barbed wire! Sandman pressed the ladder over his head and throws it into the standing ladder, knocking it over! It sends Evenflow flying off, and the champion crotches himself on the wire, as the entire male population screams with Evenflow!

Tony-“Oh dear God.”

JR-“Now I’m speechless!”

[Chanel #99]

Sandman opens up the barbed wire ladder, places it under the belt, and begins to climb. As he makes his way up the ladder, Alison emerges from the locker room and slides into the ring. She grabs Sandman’s foot, pleading with him to stop.

JR-“That’s Alison, Sandman’s sister! What is that jezebel doing out here?”

Sandman climbs back down the ladder and begins to argue with his sister. The spat heats up, climaxing with Alison spitting in Sandman’s face! Sandman grabs Alison and sets her up for the Messiah Bomb, but Evenflow, who was able to free his crotch from the barbed wire, makes the save, hitting a Primadonna onto the barbed wire, which practically skins the flesh of Sandman’s back!

Evenflow and Alison laugh, and go for a hug before deciding not to. As Alison exits the ring, Evenflow begins to climb up the normal ladder. However, Sandman positions his barbed wire ladder next to the normal one, and begins to climb along side Evenflow! The race for the belt becomes neck and neck, as the two begin to exchange punches at around the fifth rung. Evenflow stuns Sandman with a palm strike to Sandman’s broken nose, then hits the Foolish DDT off the ladder!

Tony-“Yes! Now that Sandman is out, Evenflow can easily take the gold!”

JR-“But Evenflow is hurt as well!”

Both men are down for what seems like eternity, as the official is unable to issue a standing 10 count. Finally, both men begin to stir and reach for the ladders, this time on opposite sides. Stunned, both men begin to climb slowly, as the crowd, which has been standing for ten minutes, cheers on.

Tony-“C’mon Evenflow, this is your chance!”

Evenflow makes it up to the sixth rung first, and nearly has the belt in his grasp before Sandman hits a right cross to Evenflow’s balls! Evenflow is doubled over and nearly falls forwards as Sandman catches him. With both men strattling both ladders, Sandman turns so his back is to Evenflow. Sandman places his hands underneath Evenflow’s armpits as the crowd begins to pop again, as the towel boy nails the Acid Bomb off the ladder, both men crashing again to the mats!

JR-“For the love of Gawd, will somebody please win this match!”

Again, both wrestlers are down, and Sandman holds the back of his head, as he caught it on the bottom rung on the way down. The crowd begins to chant for Sandman as both men begin to stir again. They crawl, bodies broken, to their respective ladders, on opposite sides again, and once more begin to climb.

Tony-“Please, Evenflow, get the belt and end this match!”

Sandman makes it to the sixth rung first, and nearly has the belt within his grasp as Evenflow makes it up as well. Both half-heartly exchange punches at the top as Alison slides back into the ring. She begins to push on Sandman’s barbed wire ladder, and finally succeeds in tipping it over! As Sandman begins to fall, he kicks at Evenflow’s ladder, enough to unbalance it. Both men fall off the ladders onto the barbed wire ropes! Champion and challenger fall to the mat once more!

JR-“Will somebody end the damned match! A belt is not worth your life, guys! Just call it a draw and get the medics out here!”

Stunned, Alison picks up the normal ladder and places it under the belt. She tries to pick up Evenflow, but is unable to do so. The official orders her out of the ring, and she complies, as the crowd is at a feverish peak.

Both men are bleeding feverishly out of their arms, back, torsos, and face. Sandman’s back looks like raw meat, while Evenflow’s face no longer looks human. After some time, both men begin to stir again. They both unknowingly stand the barbed wire ladder up, and slowly start to climb, on opposite sides and ladders, rung by rung.

JR-“They have to grab the belt now! They may not live if they fail this time!”

Tony-“Evenflow, hell even you Sandman, one of you, just grab the belt and end this thing!”

[Chanel #99]

Ever so slowly, both men climb the ladders. They reach for the belt, but are blinded by the blood in their eyes. They make it to the seventh rung before Evenflow nearly falls off, but saves himself. Sandman chops Evenflow weakly, but Evenflow surprisingly steps down a rung! As Sandman reaches for the belt, Evenflow digs through his pockets and pulls out the object that Zack Malibu gave him! As Sandman has his hands on the belt, Evenflow steps out and hits Sandman in the face with pepper spray!

JR-“Pepper spray? What a low-down, dirty tactic!”

Tony-“It’s genius! Evenflow has it now!”

As Sandman feverishly rubs his eyes, Evenflow shoves Sandman’s ladder backwards! Unable to hold on or see what is happening, Sandman falls off the ladder, out of the ring, and through the barbed wire and lightbulb table, which explodes on contact!

JR-“Goddammit! He’s dead! Are you happy, the man is dead!”

Finally, Evenflow is able to reach up, and with the remainder of his strength, pulls down the belt!

Tony-“Of course he is happy, he just won! He just survived the most hellacious war that I have ever seen! That is why Evenflow DDT is better then Sandman, why he is better then almost everybody else!”

Alison, crying out of joy, slides back into the ring as Evenflow is slumped over the ladder. Officials come out of the back, tending to both the victor and the loser. Evenflow is finally helped off the ladder and onto a stretcher, while Sandman is pulled out of the debris of broken glass, barbed wire, smashed table, and puddle of blood.

“Here Comes The Money” hits as both men are placed on stretchers and helped to the back. The crowd, which had been standing for over fifteen minutes, offers a standing ovation for both men.

JR-“There is nothing that I can say that will do justice to this matchup.”

Tony-“I can. Bottom line is this: Sandman threw down the gauntlet, and Evenflow stepped up and cracked a grand slam! Evenflow is still the Hardcore champion, and now he and Alison no longer have to worry about that psychotic sonofabitch!”

JR- And now what?

Stroke 9's Kick Some Ass blares and BPP comes out to congratulate Evenflow on his hardfought victory

BPP: You know, after this bloody match, I feel like giving Sandman a second chance. So EF, if its allrite with you, if Sandman can make it to HELDdown, I want you to finish what you started tonight, and take my place in the main event tag team match.

EF: It would be my pleasure…

The In-Crowd grins sickly, as the crowd is silent. EMT's come to check on Sandman, who seems to have lost a lot of blood, as well as consciousness.

As he is stretchered out, Sandman lifts one bloody arm up in the air in a first. The crowd explodes into cheers...

JR: BY GAWD, a new STAR in the OaOasT was born tonight, and his name is the SANDMAN!